Ed, Edd n Eddy (1999) s04e08 Episode Script
Thick as an Ed/Sorry, Wrong Ed
1
Man: BL-BL-BLUH, YEAH!
[SNORING]
[ROOSTER CROWS]
[MUMBLING]
Sarah: ED!
GET UP, STUPID!
MOM SAID TO MAKE SURE
YOU WALK ME TO JIMMY'S!
OH, ISN'T THAT SWEE
OF ME TO REMIND YOU?
BIG BROTHER IS HERE, SARAH.
YEP, JUST TYING MY SHOE.
HERE WE GO.
[SNORING]
AH, WHO NEEDS YOU?
[BICYCLE BELL RINGS]
ONE, TWO, TIE MY SHOE
3, 4, CLOSE THE DOOR
5, 6, GRAB SOME STICKS
7, 8, LAY THEM STRAIGH
9, 10, A BIG, FAT HEN
11, 12 Eddy: ED!
[PUNCHES]
GET UP, STUPID.
YOU'RE WASTING TIME.
TODAY'S THE DAY, BUDDY BOY.
THE SCAM TO END ALL
SCAM OUR TRIPLE "E"
FROG-JUMPING DERBY.
AFTER WE CHARGE THE SAPS
FOR A FROG RENTAL
FEE, THEY'LL RACE
FOR THE GRAND PRIZE MITTENS.
LUCKY DOGS.
YOU GOT THAT RIGHT.
Edd: GENTLEMEN,
I'VE LOCATED A POND.
AND ACQUIRED ALL THE
REQUIRED ACCOUTERMENTS
IN ORDER FOR US TO DRAF
OUR FROG COMPETITORS
FOR TODAY'S DERBY.
WE'RE GOING TO BE RICH.
YOU'RE A PEACH.
Ed: EVIL BAD.
HERE, ED, LET ME HELP.
[SNIFFING]
EDDY, THERE'S A HORRIBLE ODOR
COMING FROM YOU KNOW WHO.
NORTH TO ALASKA.
ED? STINK?
SO WHAT ELSE IS NEW?
NOT LIKE THIS, EDDY.
I THINK I'M GONNA BE SICK.
WHAT ABOUT MY SCAM?
MAYBE HIS MOMMY CALLED HIM.
COME HOME, EDWARD,
AND PICKLE YOUR FEET.
P-U, ED!
DID SOMETHING
CRAWL ON YOU AND DIE?
WHERE'D YOU GO? WE
GOT FROGS TO CATCH.
NOT UNTIL I DETERMINE
THE ORIGIN OF ED'S
FOUL EXHALATION.
HELLO, FLY.
THERE, IN HIS POCKET!
QUIT YELLING IN MY EAR.
DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH.
ALL THAT'S IN HERE
IS MY LUCKY CHEESE CHUNK.
OH, MY LORD! YUCK!
Ed: SAY HELLO TO
DOUBLE "D," SHELDON.
Edd: THAT'S DISGUSTING, ED.
NO, THAT'S SHELDON.
HE'S LIVED IN MY
POCKET FOR 57 DAYS NOW.
AAH!
Eddy: OH, NO, YOU DON'T.
I NEED YOU TO CATCH
FROGS, DOUBLE "D."
WE'RE GONNA BE RICH.
ED, SHELDON GET THE WAGON.
[EDDY PANTING]
THOSE SAPS WON'
KNOW WHAT HIT THEM.
HA HA HA! IT'S THE BEST SCAM
IN THE WHOLE STINKING WORLD.
DO YOU REMEMBER
YOUR JOB THERE, STINKY?
I AM THE FROG WRANGLER
SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO
TOUCH THOSE SLIMY WEASELS.
[FROGS CROAKING]
SO WHERE'S THE FROGS?
ALBEIT DATED, THIS MAP
CLEARLY STATES THAT
UM THAT THE
COMMON FROG DOES
UH, RESIDE WITHIN THE
CONFINES OF THIS POND.
Edd: YEOW!
[THUD]
RANCID MOLDY CHEESE!
I REFUSE TO
PARTICIPATE ANY FURTHER
UNTIL ED WASHES THAT OFFENSIVE,
PUTREFIED JACKET OF HIS.
QUIT ROCKING THE BOAT.
WE GOT PEOPLE TO FILCH.
IS THAT A FROG OR A BOOT?
A BOOT? HEH HEH HEH!
THERE. SEE IT? WHAT IS THAT?
KIND OF LOOKS LIKE
ABRAHAM LINCOLN, EDDY.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
[GRUNTING]
COMFY?
FILTHY! CRUDDY! SMELLY!
ED, I INSIST YOU
REMOVE THAT JACKE
IMMEDIATELY!
OK, IF YOU GIVE ME YOUR HAT.
MY HAT?
WHY, THAT'S THE SILLIEST THING
I'VE EVER HEARD.
ABSOLUTELY NOT.
GIVE HIM THE STUPID HA
SO WE CAN GET SOME FROGS.
THE POINT HERE IS
MY HAT DOESN'T SMELL.
OH, YES, IT DOES.
NO, IT DOES NOT.
YOU'RE JUST SAYING THA
BECAUSE I SAID
YOUR JACKET STANK.
STINKY HAT.
YOU'VE GOT A
REPULSIVE, FERMENTING
DETACHMENT OF CHEESE
IN YOUR POCKET, ED.
STINKY HAT.
ODIFEROUS CURD COAT.
STINKY HAT.
RANCID ROQUEFORT WRAP.
STINKY HAT!
REPUGNANT PARMESAN POCKET!
OH, YEAH?
STINKY HAT!
COAT OF CANTANKEROUS CAMEMBERT.
STINKY HAT!
SHUT UP! BOTH OF YOU!
HMPF!
HMPF!
OH, COME ON.
WE GOT A SCAM TO RUN HERE!
I'M SORRY, EDDY.
I CAN'T WORK UNDER
THESE CONDITIONS.
OH, YES, YOU CAN.
YOU JUST WORRY ABOU
GETTING THOSE FROGS,
AND I'll TAKE CARE OF ED.
HEY!
WHAT? THE FROGS WILL
RECOGNIZE YOU, LUMPY.
WHAT YOU NEED IS A DISGUISE.
A DISGUISE?
HURRY, GET UNDRESSED.
I GOT AN IDEA.
FROGS ARE SO STUPID.
HOORAY!
YOU OWE ME.
TRY SHOWING SOME MORE LEG, ED.
[WOLF WHISTLE]
Edd: EDDY, THIS
DELICATE PROCEDURE.
REQUIRES YOUR
ASSISTANCE, PLEASE.
HOLD THIS.
WHAT'S TAKING YOU
BACK UP! BACK UP!
[SNIFFING]
SUCCESS. GOOD.
NOW CAN YOU AND
ED KISS AND MAKE UP?
BECAUSE WE GOT MY
RETIREMENT TO THINK OF.
AHA!
THAT'S MY LUCKY CHEESE CHUNK.
WE'RE NEVER GONNA
GET THESE FROGS.
I BEG YOU, IN THE NAME
OF ALL THAT IS DECENT,
PLEASE DON'T OPEN THIS JAR, ED.
NO GO, JOE.
IT MIGHT SPOIL.
DEFILED! SOILY! PROFANE!
HOME SWEET HOME, HUH, SHELDON?
[GAGGING]
I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE.
I'M ON THE EDGE OF
SALUTARY COLLAPSE.
TOO LATE.
EVERYTHING'S GONE BLACK
BLACK AS THE MOLD
THAT PERMEATES
ED'S LUCKY CHEESE.
FORGE AHEAD, BRAVE FRIEND.
I'M SURE [COUGHS]
I'M SURE YOUR TRIPLE
"E" FROG-JUMPING DERBY
WILL DO WELL WITHOUT ME.
HMM?
OH, LOOK. DIRT.
YOU'RE MESSING UP MY SCAM!
OUCH! GET RID OF
THE STUPID JACKET, ED.
Ed: TAG. YOU'RE IT! HA HA HA!
Eddy: TAKE IT OFF!
[SNAPS FINGERS]
LOOK AT ME, ED.
I'M ALL WET AND FREEZING-LIKE.
I COULD SURE USE
SOMETHING TO KEEP ME WARM
LIKE YOUR JACKET.
GOT A TOWEL, EDDY.
DRAT.
OK, WAIT.
I KNOW. LET'S STAR
UP A NEW COUNTRY,
AND WE'LL CALL IT "EDTROPIA."
YEAH, YOU'LL BE A BIG SHOT
THE GRAND POOH-BAH
OF ALL ZOMBIES.
UM, AND THOSE
ZOMBIES WILL SALUTE
EDTROPIA'S NEW
FLAG, YOUR JACKET!
COOL! ZOMBIES!
WAVE THAT FLAG, EDDY.
WHOO HOO!
[EDDY PANTING]
OH!
Eddy: WHOO HOO HOO HOO!
NOW HOW ABOUT THEM FROGS, HUH?
YOU, TOO, DE NIRO.
I'D BE HAPPY TO
ASSIST YOU, EDDY.
JUST THINK, ED, YOU'LL
BE ABLE TO BUY A BRAIN,
WE'LL BE SO RICH.
LOOK, IT'S SHELDON.
AND TO THINK I
ALMOST FORGOT YOU.
OH, ED?
WAH!
WELL, THAT WAS ECONOMICAL.
TRIPLE "E" FROG-JUMPING DERBY,
HERE WE COME.
[WHIMPERING]
ED?
MAYBE THIS WILL HELP.
HANDKERCHIEFS CAN BE LUCKY, TOO.
YOU GUYS WILL NEED
MORE THAN LUCK
IF WE DON'T CATCH SOME FROGS!
OK, HOW ABOUT
ANGUS, MY MORE-THAN-LUCKY FISHY.
ED, GET RID OF THA
CARCASS IMMEDIATELY!
STINKY HAT!
SHIRT OF FETID FLOUNDER!
STINKY HAT!
TAINTED TROUT TOP!
STINKY HAT!
EDDY!
[GRUNTING]
CHECK OUT THE PHONE.
ROLF, HOW DOES A DUD LIKE YOU
GET A HAPPENING PHONE LIKE THIS?
Rolf: STAY BACK!
YOU AIN'T THROWING IT AWAY,
ARE YOU, STRETCH?
ASK NO QUESTIONS!
A CEREMONIAL TELEPHONE BURIAL?
AHEM. MY, HOW QUAINT.
CAN I HELP, ROLF?
OH.
COME NO FURTHER!
ROLF MUST COMPLETE THIS TASK
FORCED UPON HIM, OR
WE ARE ALL DOOMED.
I'll GIVE YOU A
SHOELACE FOR IT.
COOL!
OW!
Edd: PARDON ME, ROLF,
BUT HOW COULD A TELEPHONE
BE A MESSENGER OF DOOM?
KNOW NOTHING!
DON'T BURY IT! GIVE IT TO ME!
WALK AWAY FROM THE SUFFERING
THAT HAS CURSED ROLF'S FAMILY
FOR GENERATIONS, ED BOY!
HA HA!
I GOT A FEELING YOU'VE
CRACKED THERE, DRACULA.
WHY DON'T YOU GE
VICTOR TO GIVE YOU
A MASSAGE OR SOMETHING,
AND I'll GUARD THE BIG
BAD PHONE FOR YOU.
VICTOR'S HOOVES ARE MAGIC
ON ROLF'S HARDENED MUSCLES.
THANK YOU, ED BOY. THANK YOU.
THAT WAS REALLY
NICE OF YOU, EDDY,
TO EASE ROLF'S INTRINSIC GUILT.
IDIOT.
OK, ED, DIG!
GOODY, GOODY.
DIG A HOLE, DIG A HOLE ♪
REALLY, EDDY,
ANOTHER KNICKKNACK FOR
THAT ALREADY OVERSTIMULATED
ROOM OF YOURS?
Eddy: JEALOUS.
Ed: DIG A HOLE. [SMACK]
OUCH!
[MUSIC PLAYING]
CUTS A FIGURE IN
SOCIETY, DON'T IT?
IS THAT A NEW PHONE?
Edd: PLEASE STAY WITH US, ED.
[RING]
[RING]
[RING]
SOMEBODY'S CALLING ME.
STRANGE. THERE DOESN'T SEEM
TO BE ANY CONNECTION, YET
SO? IT'S CALLED A
CORDLESS, GRANDPA.
HELLO?
Edd: EDWARD?
YES, MOMMY.
WHAT'S WITH YOU?
IT WASN'T ME, EDDY.
HONEST AND FOR TRULY.
[RING]
GOT IT!
GET AWAY FROM MY PHONE, STUPID.
PROBABLY NAZZ.
AND I'M THEODOR GEISEL.
WHAT'S COOKING, GOOD-LOOKING?
I KNOW WHERE YOU'RE
GOING WITH THIS, EDDY.
NIGHTY NIGHT.
Edd: AHEM.
IT LOOKS LIKE YOU COULD
USE A NEW MATTRESS, EDDY.
SHALL WE ASK ROLF IF HE'S
BURIED ONE SOMEWHERE?
HEE HEE HEE!
YEAH, SURE.
ROLF?
[RING]
COULD BE ALL THOSE SWOONING
ADOLESCENT GIRLFRIENDS
THAT RESIDE IN YOUR OWN MIND.
[RING]
Y-ELLO?
EDDY'S IN PAIN NOW. HE'LL
HAVE TO CALL YOU BACK.
WHAT AN UNFORTUNATE
SET OF CIRCUMSTANCES.
SOMETHING'S UP WITH THIS PHONE.
[RING]
HELLO.
LET IT RING, ED.
JUST PRETEND WE'RE NOT HOME.
IT'S FOR YOU, EDDY.
HELLO?
OH, LOOKIT. A SKUNK.
DID YOU KNOW IN SOME PARTS
IT'S ALSO KNOWN AS A POLECAT?
WHO STEPPED ON A DUCK?
THIS STUPID PHONE'S CURSED!
Edd: OH, COME NOW, EDDY.
THESE UNFORTUNATE
MISHAPS ARE RANDOM AT BEST.
ANY RELATIONSHIP TO
ROLF'S TELEPHONE OF DOOM
IS PURE COINCIDENCE.
I SAY WE TEST IT.
TEST IT?
LIKE MUSTARD?
[AIR-RAID SIREN]
EVACUATE THE AREA!
MAN YOUR STATIONS!
Eddy: EASY, ED.
EASY.
STAND CLEAR, LUMPY.
HONESTLY, EDDY.
IT'S JUST A PHONE.
Eddy: WHAT'S TAKING IT?
MAYBE IT'S ON TO US, EDDY.
HEE HEE HEE!
[TELEPHONE RINGING]
AHA!
YOU'RE SUPPOSED
TO ANSWER IT, IDIOT!
HELLO?
THERE. YOUR TES
PROVES IT, EDDY.
ANY CORRELATION
BETWEEN THE PHONE
AND YOUR ACCIDENTS IS OUCH!
I ASSURE YOU,
THERE IS A RATIONAL REASON
FOR THIS MISCHANCE, EDDY.
AH, HERE'S YOUR CULPRIT:
JUST A RUSTY, WORN NUT.
BAD PHONE.
EVIL. ROTTEN.
AND ITCHY.
DON'T ANSWER IT, ED!
RUSTY, WORN NUT, EDDY.
ME, AGAIN.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
CAN THE SON OF A
SHEPHERD ASSIST YOU?
YEAH, TAKE BACK
YOUR STUPID PHONE!
IT'S CURSED, I TELL YOU!
YIKES!
YOU HAVE RESURRECTED
THE DISPATCHER OF DESPAIR.
LET IT BE ON YOUR HEAD!
AAH! IT'S YOURS. YOU KEEP IT!
HALF-WITTED BOY!
HOT POTATO!
IF I MAY INTERJECT
Edd: PEOPLE, PLEASE
CONTROL YOURSELVES!
WAIT!
YOU'VE LET A COMMON
HOUSEHOLD PHONE
FEED UPON YOUR LACK
OF RATIONAL THINKING.
EDDY!
ROLF, TAKE IT BACK!
TAKE IT! TAKE IT!
I HAVE NO IDEA WHA
YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
I'M BEGGING YOU.
WHAT IS THAT? WHO ARE YOU?
I GOT IT! I GOT IT!
OH, FOR GOODNESS SAKE,
LET'S PUT AN END TO
THIS ONCE AND FOR ALL.
HELLO. EDWARD
DOUBLE "D" SPEAKING.
[GROANING]
[HORN HONKING]
[HUMMING]
[EDDY PANTING]
HEY, JONNY BOY.
HERE, HAVE A PHONE.
YOURS TO KEEP. FREE!
WE'LL JUST GLUE IT TO YOUR HEAD
SO YOU DON'T LOSE IT, OK?
OK.
PLANK, GET OUT HERE.
WE JUST SCORED
THE COOLEST PHONE.
WHOO HOO!
I'M OFF THE HOOK!
NO MORE BAD LUCK!
OR BATHTUB RING.
I'M GONNA BE SICK.
HEE HEE HEE!
NO MORE CURSED
PHONES FOR THIS GUY.
TELEPHONES AREN'T CURSED, EDDY!
THEY'RE PLASTIC!
CALM DOWN, DOUBLE "D."
THINK OCEAN WAVES,
SEA MAMMALS, ARIAS.
WAS THAT YOUR
DARK SIDE, DOUBLE "D"?
Eddy: SHAKE A LEG, GIRLS.
THERE'S STILL ENOUGH
LIGHT TO GET A SCAM IN
BEFORE SHUTEYE.
DIDN'T HEAR A WORD
YOU SAID, EDDY.
Edd: COUNT ME IN, EDDY.
I'M ALL FOR A BIT OF NORMALITY
AFTER A DAY LIKE TODAY.
Ed: WELL, THAT'S A KEEPER.
RISE AND SHINE, FOLKS.
GET YOUR ED FLAKES CEREAL HERE.
EXCUSE ME, EDDY,
BUT WOULDN'T A BREAKFAST VENTURE
BE MORE SUITED TO A
MORNING CLIENTELE?
THIS AIN'T YOUR SAME OLD SAME
OLD BREAKFAST CEREAL, DOUBLE "D."
IT'S 100% CURSE FREE!
EDDY, GET OFF THIS
CURSE FIXATION.
THERE'S NO SUCH THING.
SAYS YOU.
GOOD MORNING, TREE.
SEE?
WHAT DO YOU CALL THAT?
[AIR WHISTLING]
HIPPOS!
AHA!
PROOF POSITIVE
THAT THESE UNFORTUNATE INCIDENTS
HAVE BEEN NOTHING
MORE THAN COINCIDENCES!
LOOK AROUND YOU, EDDY,
AND WHAT DO YOU SEE?
NOTHING.
DO YOU SEE A PHONE?
I DON'T SEE A PHONE.
NO PHONE. NO CURSE.
I REST MY CASE.
WHY ME?!
AAH!
Edd: COINCIDENCE, EDDY!
[RING]
Eddy: AAH!
[RING]
BOY, PLANK, YOU SURE
ARE A POPULAR GUY.
Eddy: AAH! HELP ME!
ED, EDD N EDDY!
BL-BL-BLUH, YEAH!
Man: BL-BL-BLUH, YEAH!
[SNORING]
[ROOSTER CROWS]
[MUMBLING]
Sarah: ED!
GET UP, STUPID!
MOM SAID TO MAKE SURE
YOU WALK ME TO JIMMY'S!
OH, ISN'T THAT SWEE
OF ME TO REMIND YOU?
BIG BROTHER IS HERE, SARAH.
YEP, JUST TYING MY SHOE.
HERE WE GO.
[SNORING]
AH, WHO NEEDS YOU?
[BICYCLE BELL RINGS]
ONE, TWO, TIE MY SHOE
3, 4, CLOSE THE DOOR
5, 6, GRAB SOME STICKS
7, 8, LAY THEM STRAIGH
9, 10, A BIG, FAT HEN
11, 12 Eddy: ED!
[PUNCHES]
GET UP, STUPID.
YOU'RE WASTING TIME.
TODAY'S THE DAY, BUDDY BOY.
THE SCAM TO END ALL
SCAM OUR TRIPLE "E"
FROG-JUMPING DERBY.
AFTER WE CHARGE THE SAPS
FOR A FROG RENTAL
FEE, THEY'LL RACE
FOR THE GRAND PRIZE MITTENS.
LUCKY DOGS.
YOU GOT THAT RIGHT.
Edd: GENTLEMEN,
I'VE LOCATED A POND.
AND ACQUIRED ALL THE
REQUIRED ACCOUTERMENTS
IN ORDER FOR US TO DRAF
OUR FROG COMPETITORS
FOR TODAY'S DERBY.
WE'RE GOING TO BE RICH.
YOU'RE A PEACH.
Ed: EVIL BAD.
HERE, ED, LET ME HELP.
[SNIFFING]
EDDY, THERE'S A HORRIBLE ODOR
COMING FROM YOU KNOW WHO.
NORTH TO ALASKA.
ED? STINK?
SO WHAT ELSE IS NEW?
NOT LIKE THIS, EDDY.
I THINK I'M GONNA BE SICK.
WHAT ABOUT MY SCAM?
MAYBE HIS MOMMY CALLED HIM.
COME HOME, EDWARD,
AND PICKLE YOUR FEET.
P-U, ED!
DID SOMETHING
CRAWL ON YOU AND DIE?
WHERE'D YOU GO? WE
GOT FROGS TO CATCH.
NOT UNTIL I DETERMINE
THE ORIGIN OF ED'S
FOUL EXHALATION.
HELLO, FLY.
THERE, IN HIS POCKET!
QUIT YELLING IN MY EAR.
DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH.
ALL THAT'S IN HERE
IS MY LUCKY CHEESE CHUNK.
OH, MY LORD! YUCK!
Ed: SAY HELLO TO
DOUBLE "D," SHELDON.
Edd: THAT'S DISGUSTING, ED.
NO, THAT'S SHELDON.
HE'S LIVED IN MY
POCKET FOR 57 DAYS NOW.
AAH!
Eddy: OH, NO, YOU DON'T.
I NEED YOU TO CATCH
FROGS, DOUBLE "D."
WE'RE GONNA BE RICH.
ED, SHELDON GET THE WAGON.
[EDDY PANTING]
THOSE SAPS WON'
KNOW WHAT HIT THEM.
HA HA HA! IT'S THE BEST SCAM
IN THE WHOLE STINKING WORLD.
DO YOU REMEMBER
YOUR JOB THERE, STINKY?
I AM THE FROG WRANGLER
SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO
TOUCH THOSE SLIMY WEASELS.
[FROGS CROAKING]
SO WHERE'S THE FROGS?
ALBEIT DATED, THIS MAP
CLEARLY STATES THAT
UM THAT THE
COMMON FROG DOES
UH, RESIDE WITHIN THE
CONFINES OF THIS POND.
Edd: YEOW!
[THUD]
RANCID MOLDY CHEESE!
I REFUSE TO
PARTICIPATE ANY FURTHER
UNTIL ED WASHES THAT OFFENSIVE,
PUTREFIED JACKET OF HIS.
QUIT ROCKING THE BOAT.
WE GOT PEOPLE TO FILCH.
IS THAT A FROG OR A BOOT?
A BOOT? HEH HEH HEH!
THERE. SEE IT? WHAT IS THAT?
KIND OF LOOKS LIKE
ABRAHAM LINCOLN, EDDY.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
[GRUNTING]
COMFY?
FILTHY! CRUDDY! SMELLY!
ED, I INSIST YOU
REMOVE THAT JACKE
IMMEDIATELY!
OK, IF YOU GIVE ME YOUR HAT.
MY HAT?
WHY, THAT'S THE SILLIEST THING
I'VE EVER HEARD.
ABSOLUTELY NOT.
GIVE HIM THE STUPID HA
SO WE CAN GET SOME FROGS.
THE POINT HERE IS
MY HAT DOESN'T SMELL.
OH, YES, IT DOES.
NO, IT DOES NOT.
YOU'RE JUST SAYING THA
BECAUSE I SAID
YOUR JACKET STANK.
STINKY HAT.
YOU'VE GOT A
REPULSIVE, FERMENTING
DETACHMENT OF CHEESE
IN YOUR POCKET, ED.
STINKY HAT.
ODIFEROUS CURD COAT.
STINKY HAT.
RANCID ROQUEFORT WRAP.
STINKY HAT!
REPUGNANT PARMESAN POCKET!
OH, YEAH?
STINKY HAT!
COAT OF CANTANKEROUS CAMEMBERT.
STINKY HAT!
SHUT UP! BOTH OF YOU!
HMPF!
HMPF!
OH, COME ON.
WE GOT A SCAM TO RUN HERE!
I'M SORRY, EDDY.
I CAN'T WORK UNDER
THESE CONDITIONS.
OH, YES, YOU CAN.
YOU JUST WORRY ABOU
GETTING THOSE FROGS,
AND I'll TAKE CARE OF ED.
HEY!
WHAT? THE FROGS WILL
RECOGNIZE YOU, LUMPY.
WHAT YOU NEED IS A DISGUISE.
A DISGUISE?
HURRY, GET UNDRESSED.
I GOT AN IDEA.
FROGS ARE SO STUPID.
HOORAY!
YOU OWE ME.
TRY SHOWING SOME MORE LEG, ED.
[WOLF WHISTLE]
Edd: EDDY, THIS
DELICATE PROCEDURE.
REQUIRES YOUR
ASSISTANCE, PLEASE.
HOLD THIS.
WHAT'S TAKING YOU
BACK UP! BACK UP!
[SNIFFING]
SUCCESS. GOOD.
NOW CAN YOU AND
ED KISS AND MAKE UP?
BECAUSE WE GOT MY
RETIREMENT TO THINK OF.
AHA!
THAT'S MY LUCKY CHEESE CHUNK.
WE'RE NEVER GONNA
GET THESE FROGS.
I BEG YOU, IN THE NAME
OF ALL THAT IS DECENT,
PLEASE DON'T OPEN THIS JAR, ED.
NO GO, JOE.
IT MIGHT SPOIL.
DEFILED! SOILY! PROFANE!
HOME SWEET HOME, HUH, SHELDON?
[GAGGING]
I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE.
I'M ON THE EDGE OF
SALUTARY COLLAPSE.
TOO LATE.
EVERYTHING'S GONE BLACK
BLACK AS THE MOLD
THAT PERMEATES
ED'S LUCKY CHEESE.
FORGE AHEAD, BRAVE FRIEND.
I'M SURE [COUGHS]
I'M SURE YOUR TRIPLE
"E" FROG-JUMPING DERBY
WILL DO WELL WITHOUT ME.
HMM?
OH, LOOK. DIRT.
YOU'RE MESSING UP MY SCAM!
OUCH! GET RID OF
THE STUPID JACKET, ED.
Ed: TAG. YOU'RE IT! HA HA HA!
Eddy: TAKE IT OFF!
[SNAPS FINGERS]
LOOK AT ME, ED.
I'M ALL WET AND FREEZING-LIKE.
I COULD SURE USE
SOMETHING TO KEEP ME WARM
LIKE YOUR JACKET.
GOT A TOWEL, EDDY.
DRAT.
OK, WAIT.
I KNOW. LET'S STAR
UP A NEW COUNTRY,
AND WE'LL CALL IT "EDTROPIA."
YEAH, YOU'LL BE A BIG SHOT
THE GRAND POOH-BAH
OF ALL ZOMBIES.
UM, AND THOSE
ZOMBIES WILL SALUTE
EDTROPIA'S NEW
FLAG, YOUR JACKET!
COOL! ZOMBIES!
WAVE THAT FLAG, EDDY.
WHOO HOO!
[EDDY PANTING]
OH!
Eddy: WHOO HOO HOO HOO!
NOW HOW ABOUT THEM FROGS, HUH?
YOU, TOO, DE NIRO.
I'D BE HAPPY TO
ASSIST YOU, EDDY.
JUST THINK, ED, YOU'LL
BE ABLE TO BUY A BRAIN,
WE'LL BE SO RICH.
LOOK, IT'S SHELDON.
AND TO THINK I
ALMOST FORGOT YOU.
OH, ED?
WAH!
WELL, THAT WAS ECONOMICAL.
TRIPLE "E" FROG-JUMPING DERBY,
HERE WE COME.
[WHIMPERING]
ED?
MAYBE THIS WILL HELP.
HANDKERCHIEFS CAN BE LUCKY, TOO.
YOU GUYS WILL NEED
MORE THAN LUCK
IF WE DON'T CATCH SOME FROGS!
OK, HOW ABOUT
ANGUS, MY MORE-THAN-LUCKY FISHY.
ED, GET RID OF THA
CARCASS IMMEDIATELY!
STINKY HAT!
SHIRT OF FETID FLOUNDER!
STINKY HAT!
TAINTED TROUT TOP!
STINKY HAT!
EDDY!
[GRUNTING]
CHECK OUT THE PHONE.
ROLF, HOW DOES A DUD LIKE YOU
GET A HAPPENING PHONE LIKE THIS?
Rolf: STAY BACK!
YOU AIN'T THROWING IT AWAY,
ARE YOU, STRETCH?
ASK NO QUESTIONS!
A CEREMONIAL TELEPHONE BURIAL?
AHEM. MY, HOW QUAINT.
CAN I HELP, ROLF?
OH.
COME NO FURTHER!
ROLF MUST COMPLETE THIS TASK
FORCED UPON HIM, OR
WE ARE ALL DOOMED.
I'll GIVE YOU A
SHOELACE FOR IT.
COOL!
OW!
Edd: PARDON ME, ROLF,
BUT HOW COULD A TELEPHONE
BE A MESSENGER OF DOOM?
KNOW NOTHING!
DON'T BURY IT! GIVE IT TO ME!
WALK AWAY FROM THE SUFFERING
THAT HAS CURSED ROLF'S FAMILY
FOR GENERATIONS, ED BOY!
HA HA!
I GOT A FEELING YOU'VE
CRACKED THERE, DRACULA.
WHY DON'T YOU GE
VICTOR TO GIVE YOU
A MASSAGE OR SOMETHING,
AND I'll GUARD THE BIG
BAD PHONE FOR YOU.
VICTOR'S HOOVES ARE MAGIC
ON ROLF'S HARDENED MUSCLES.
THANK YOU, ED BOY. THANK YOU.
THAT WAS REALLY
NICE OF YOU, EDDY,
TO EASE ROLF'S INTRINSIC GUILT.
IDIOT.
OK, ED, DIG!
GOODY, GOODY.
DIG A HOLE, DIG A HOLE ♪
REALLY, EDDY,
ANOTHER KNICKKNACK FOR
THAT ALREADY OVERSTIMULATED
ROOM OF YOURS?
Eddy: JEALOUS.
Ed: DIG A HOLE. [SMACK]
OUCH!
[MUSIC PLAYING]
CUTS A FIGURE IN
SOCIETY, DON'T IT?
IS THAT A NEW PHONE?
Edd: PLEASE STAY WITH US, ED.
[RING]
[RING]
[RING]
SOMEBODY'S CALLING ME.
STRANGE. THERE DOESN'T SEEM
TO BE ANY CONNECTION, YET
SO? IT'S CALLED A
CORDLESS, GRANDPA.
HELLO?
Edd: EDWARD?
YES, MOMMY.
WHAT'S WITH YOU?
IT WASN'T ME, EDDY.
HONEST AND FOR TRULY.
[RING]
GOT IT!
GET AWAY FROM MY PHONE, STUPID.
PROBABLY NAZZ.
AND I'M THEODOR GEISEL.
WHAT'S COOKING, GOOD-LOOKING?
I KNOW WHERE YOU'RE
GOING WITH THIS, EDDY.
NIGHTY NIGHT.
Edd: AHEM.
IT LOOKS LIKE YOU COULD
USE A NEW MATTRESS, EDDY.
SHALL WE ASK ROLF IF HE'S
BURIED ONE SOMEWHERE?
HEE HEE HEE!
YEAH, SURE.
ROLF?
[RING]
COULD BE ALL THOSE SWOONING
ADOLESCENT GIRLFRIENDS
THAT RESIDE IN YOUR OWN MIND.
[RING]
Y-ELLO?
EDDY'S IN PAIN NOW. HE'LL
HAVE TO CALL YOU BACK.
WHAT AN UNFORTUNATE
SET OF CIRCUMSTANCES.
SOMETHING'S UP WITH THIS PHONE.
[RING]
HELLO.
LET IT RING, ED.
JUST PRETEND WE'RE NOT HOME.
IT'S FOR YOU, EDDY.
HELLO?
OH, LOOKIT. A SKUNK.
DID YOU KNOW IN SOME PARTS
IT'S ALSO KNOWN AS A POLECAT?
WHO STEPPED ON A DUCK?
THIS STUPID PHONE'S CURSED!
Edd: OH, COME NOW, EDDY.
THESE UNFORTUNATE
MISHAPS ARE RANDOM AT BEST.
ANY RELATIONSHIP TO
ROLF'S TELEPHONE OF DOOM
IS PURE COINCIDENCE.
I SAY WE TEST IT.
TEST IT?
LIKE MUSTARD?
[AIR-RAID SIREN]
EVACUATE THE AREA!
MAN YOUR STATIONS!
Eddy: EASY, ED.
EASY.
STAND CLEAR, LUMPY.
HONESTLY, EDDY.
IT'S JUST A PHONE.
Eddy: WHAT'S TAKING IT?
MAYBE IT'S ON TO US, EDDY.
HEE HEE HEE!
[TELEPHONE RINGING]
AHA!
YOU'RE SUPPOSED
TO ANSWER IT, IDIOT!
HELLO?
THERE. YOUR TES
PROVES IT, EDDY.
ANY CORRELATION
BETWEEN THE PHONE
AND YOUR ACCIDENTS IS OUCH!
I ASSURE YOU,
THERE IS A RATIONAL REASON
FOR THIS MISCHANCE, EDDY.
AH, HERE'S YOUR CULPRIT:
JUST A RUSTY, WORN NUT.
BAD PHONE.
EVIL. ROTTEN.
AND ITCHY.
DON'T ANSWER IT, ED!
RUSTY, WORN NUT, EDDY.
ME, AGAIN.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
CAN THE SON OF A
SHEPHERD ASSIST YOU?
YEAH, TAKE BACK
YOUR STUPID PHONE!
IT'S CURSED, I TELL YOU!
YIKES!
YOU HAVE RESURRECTED
THE DISPATCHER OF DESPAIR.
LET IT BE ON YOUR HEAD!
AAH! IT'S YOURS. YOU KEEP IT!
HALF-WITTED BOY!
HOT POTATO!
IF I MAY INTERJECT
Edd: PEOPLE, PLEASE
CONTROL YOURSELVES!
WAIT!
YOU'VE LET A COMMON
HOUSEHOLD PHONE
FEED UPON YOUR LACK
OF RATIONAL THINKING.
EDDY!
ROLF, TAKE IT BACK!
TAKE IT! TAKE IT!
I HAVE NO IDEA WHA
YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
I'M BEGGING YOU.
WHAT IS THAT? WHO ARE YOU?
I GOT IT! I GOT IT!
OH, FOR GOODNESS SAKE,
LET'S PUT AN END TO
THIS ONCE AND FOR ALL.
HELLO. EDWARD
DOUBLE "D" SPEAKING.
[GROANING]
[HORN HONKING]
[HUMMING]
[EDDY PANTING]
HEY, JONNY BOY.
HERE, HAVE A PHONE.
YOURS TO KEEP. FREE!
WE'LL JUST GLUE IT TO YOUR HEAD
SO YOU DON'T LOSE IT, OK?
OK.
PLANK, GET OUT HERE.
WE JUST SCORED
THE COOLEST PHONE.
WHOO HOO!
I'M OFF THE HOOK!
NO MORE BAD LUCK!
OR BATHTUB RING.
I'M GONNA BE SICK.
HEE HEE HEE!
NO MORE CURSED
PHONES FOR THIS GUY.
TELEPHONES AREN'T CURSED, EDDY!
THEY'RE PLASTIC!
CALM DOWN, DOUBLE "D."
THINK OCEAN WAVES,
SEA MAMMALS, ARIAS.
WAS THAT YOUR
DARK SIDE, DOUBLE "D"?
Eddy: SHAKE A LEG, GIRLS.
THERE'S STILL ENOUGH
LIGHT TO GET A SCAM IN
BEFORE SHUTEYE.
DIDN'T HEAR A WORD
YOU SAID, EDDY.
Edd: COUNT ME IN, EDDY.
I'M ALL FOR A BIT OF NORMALITY
AFTER A DAY LIKE TODAY.
Ed: WELL, THAT'S A KEEPER.
RISE AND SHINE, FOLKS.
GET YOUR ED FLAKES CEREAL HERE.
EXCUSE ME, EDDY,
BUT WOULDN'T A BREAKFAST VENTURE
BE MORE SUITED TO A
MORNING CLIENTELE?
THIS AIN'T YOUR SAME OLD SAME
OLD BREAKFAST CEREAL, DOUBLE "D."
IT'S 100% CURSE FREE!
EDDY, GET OFF THIS
CURSE FIXATION.
THERE'S NO SUCH THING.
SAYS YOU.
GOOD MORNING, TREE.
SEE?
WHAT DO YOU CALL THAT?
[AIR WHISTLING]
HIPPOS!
AHA!
PROOF POSITIVE
THAT THESE UNFORTUNATE INCIDENTS
HAVE BEEN NOTHING
MORE THAN COINCIDENCES!
LOOK AROUND YOU, EDDY,
AND WHAT DO YOU SEE?
NOTHING.
DO YOU SEE A PHONE?
I DON'T SEE A PHONE.
NO PHONE. NO CURSE.
I REST MY CASE.
WHY ME?!
AAH!
Edd: COINCIDENCE, EDDY!
[RING]
Eddy: AAH!
[RING]
BOY, PLANK, YOU SURE
ARE A POPULAR GUY.
Eddy: AAH! HELP ME!
ED, EDD N EDDY!
BL-BL-BLUH, YEAH!