The O.C. (2003) s04e08 Episode Script

Previously on The O.
C.
Thought you'd be a silent partner.
- Came to see my girlfriend.
- What? You need new recruits, right? So sign us up.
- Your date doesn't pay you.
That's illegal.
- Right.
I could put off RISD for a semester.
We could go back together.
- You'd put off college for me? - Take it.
- It's yours.
- Taylor.
- I found you.
- I Just had the weirdest dream.
- You were in it, I think.
- I think you were in my dream too.
I'm really glad you're here.
Hey, I asked you a question.
Yeah, no, Just some of these bugs are really sort of stubborn.
- I was using that.
- You're not.
You wanna tell me what's going on? What if I said it's New Year's Eve and we're going to vegas? Why are the girls acting strange? I don't I mean, you know, I don't know.
- How long is it supposed to take? - Five minutes.
- Okay, four minutes and 47 seconds.
- You're lying.
It's written all over your face.
Well, then I shouldn't bluff when we get to Las vegas.
- Man, they're in the bathroom.
Ask them.
- Thirteen seconds left.
- Do I need to remind you why you're here? - Eleven more seconds.
- You haven't killed me? - What if there wasn't enough pee? Because you didn't have any plans so you hiJacked mine.
- How many bars am I looking for? - Two bars.
Six more seconds.
- I told you I'd pay you back.
- I can't look.
I'm collecting.
What's happening? Oh, my God, three more seconds.
Two more seconds.
One more second.
- Here you go.
- Hey.
Last coffee of '06.
How much you hoping I don't make that Joke all day? - Not like I'll be around.
- So walk me through your itinerary.
- You've got breakfast with Taylor.
- Back home to pack, lunch, off to vegas.
- She doesn't know you're taking her.
- It's a surprise.
So he's told me nothing.
And I Just thought since he went to all of this trouble it would be nice for me to surprise him too, and - Summer, are you even listening to me? - What? No.
Yeah, every word.
- Because you seem kind of out of it.
- I'm sorry.
I'm Just still waking up.
You guys seem pretty serious.
Old adage, couples who have comas together, stay together.
- She won't think vegas is cheesy, will she? - You think it's cheesy to get him lingerie? I'm gonna be wearing it, but it's really for him.
- Taylor - Right, it's way too soon for lingerie.
Is he gonna think I'm some kinky sex-starved divorcee? - You're being paranoid.
- Still, be careful.
Because people, they go to vegas and they come back married.
What about you and Summer? Well, if it's a typical night for us, I'm probably in for some Korean cinema manga and making new friends on MySpace.
- In other words - No plans.
That's a dirty word.
That's right up there with responsibility and future.
Now, there'll be plenty of time for that when we're in college.
- And she's onboard with that? - Totally.
I hope we don't have to kill him.
When are you meeting Ryan? - Now.
All right, I will see you tomorrow.
- Happy New Year.
Happy New Year, Summer.
Same to you.
Good luck tonight.
I'm sure everything will be great.
- Oh, speak of the devil.
- Summer.
- Atwood.
- Taylor.
- Hi.
- You looking forward to your surprise? - I am.
Are you looking forward to yours? - I am.
That's my cue.
Okay, here it is.
- What is it? - Open it.
- Hey.
- Hi.
I wanted to talk to you about tonight.
Why talk when actions speak so much louder than words? - What is it? - I don't know, Just open it.
Okay.
- Oh, my.
- Surprise! It's funny because it's not.
- Do you think I'm a whore? - What? No, no.
It's Just, I already have this.
You nut.
For a second there, I was like, maJor miscalculation.
No, no, no.
It's gonna be a great night.
All right, come here.
Yeah.
You didn't make any plans for us tonight, did you? Well, I thought we would Just What? "Jamaica" them up as you go? You are such a baby.
You know what, I'm done babysitting you, do you understand me? I'm done.
I'm not questioning the fantasy, Spencer.
We've all imagined doing it with the delivery boy.
I am questioning whether we should be paying for the pixxa.
- It's starting to add up.
- Running a male-prostitution ring, Julie.
Pixxa's the cost of business.
Hey, who did we set Petrea Marchand up with? That guy you call the Mambo King.
My real question, what do you know about money laundering? That'd be nothing.
Why? Because it's the holidays, and we're busy and I can't keep filing all this cash under extra money.
I'll see you later at the place.
- Yeah.
- That was Jimmy on the phone.
- He's supposed to call Kaitlin at midnight? - Yeah.
Well, he's hosting a party on his boat.
He wanted you to tell Kaitlin he's sorry but he might be out of cell-phone range.
Poor Kaitlin.
I know she doesn't show it, but I think she really, really misses him.
- Can I help you with something? - No, no.
No, I'm good.
Julie, I appreciate you handling the bookkeeping but honestly, I probably have more experience.
Well, you know, all the more reason for me to learn.
I mean, what if you get hit by a bus or something? - God forbid.
- There must be something I can do.
Some more coffee? I got it at the place on the corner.
Somebody going on a coffee run? I'll take a latte.
Hello, sweetheart.
Just thought I'd drop off an invite to my soiree.
Yeah, Gordon, you know, I've received like 11 of these in the mail.
Now you got an even doxen.
So read it to me.
That Joke never gets old, does it? Been using it since 1989.
So, what time you want me to send a limo? Honestly, I'm not sure that I'll get through with everything here.
Damn it, hotcakes, when I bankrolled this operation I thought I'd see you more, not less.
Since I got back from Riyadh we've had two dinner dates and xero hanky-panky.
Well, it's a new business, Gordon.
Look, at least let me get you a bean counter to take care of some of the paperwork.
No, Bullit, let me have that back.
Wow, you girls eat a mess of pixxa.
We work through dinner a lot.
Look, I really appreciate the gesture, Bullit, but I would prefer to do this on my own.
Okay.
You coming tonight? If I can.
Damn woman.
And he requested me? Yeah, all right, all right, I'll see what I can do.
Okay.
Working on New Year's Eve? Yeah, one of your homeless guys from Thanksgiving attacked a parking meter.
Couldn't remember his name, but he remembered mine.
I was talking about the sandwiches.
Yeah, Ryan's putting together a cooler for vegas.
I'm his sandwich guy.
- Cohens are natural sandwich artists.
- It's like our very own superpower.
Yeah, I don't know if it qualifies us for the Justice League though.
What's up? You got that something's-up look on your face.
You know, probably because something's up.
- What'd you do? - More like what I didn't do.
Turns out Summer's expecting me to make some elaborate New Year's Eve plans.
Romantic holiday plans, definitely not a Cohen superpower.
Nine months until we go to college.
This is the last time we don't have to worry about stuff.
Yeah, the ladies don't really buy that line though.
You still have to show her that you value her.
My advice: Put some thought and effort into making some real New Year's Eve plans, pronto.
Well, my work here is done.
I got a date with a bail bondsman.
And you and Summer have a wonderful New Year's Eve.
And be safe.
- Hey.
- Hey.
- You be safe, too, in vegas, would you? - Yeah.
Sandwiches are all ready, good to go.
If I do say so, they're great.
- Thank you, Sandy.
- The only thing you have to keep in mind? - Make it personal.
- I think I Just got the perfect idea.
Good man.
- What was that about? - Oh, nothing.
- Just Summer and I are coming with you.
- What? You may wanna make some more sandwiches l'm gonna go upstairs and pack.
- You're late.
- Yeah, I've been looking for my book.
What book? The one with everyone's names, phone numbers I had it when I was talking to you, I put it down for a sec, it was gone.
- This has got to be a sign.
- What are you talking about? Your father tried to saddle me with an accountant today.
What if he finds out his investment's a whorehouse? Or if Kirsten finds out? No, we need to shut this down now.
Then let's Just do tonight.
All right? We both need the money.
We can manage without.
What if Neil sells your house? Where are you gonna live? We're gonna make 40 grand each.
Now, you wanna close down shop after that cool, but let's do tonight.
Come on.
- We'll burn everything tomorrow.
- I'll light the match myself.
Frank, Frank, Frank.
Damn, damn, double-damn.
Good to see you.
It's good to see you.
Come on in.
Have a seat.
- Can I fix you a drink? - No, I'm fine.
So, cowboy, what the hell are you doing in these neck of the woods? Well, you once said if I ever needed a Job Serious? Now, don't be Jerking the Bullit around.
- I'm serious.
- Well, now, that's a good thing.
I happen to have a couple of places I could use you pronto.
But knowing you, you've already picked something out.
You're not gonna believe this, but I saw you invested in a dating service.
You're kidding, right? A man of your talents? I think there's a future in it.
Yeah, but the tricky thing there is my girlfriend, Julie she's kind of running that.
- Really? I know what you're thinking, but it's not like that barmaid in Daytona.
- That one, she was a con artist.
- And Julie's legit? Absolutely.
I mean, Julie's problem is not thievery, it's pride.
She wants to do everything herself, and I get no chance to see her.
Oh, wait.
Bullit.
Right, the dress shop.
Okay.
On the way.
Sorry, I gotta go.
Well, it was good to see you.
- You're gonna love Newport.
- I'm sure I will.
Oh, and if Julie ever gets less proud, you let me know.
I'd love to help out.
- I'll do that.
Happy New Year, partner.
- Same to you.
- See you later.
- All right.
Taylor, you look terrible.
What's the matter? Okay, can you keep a secret? But I mean, a big secret.
Like, a really big secret.
- Yeah.
- I think you might be pregnant.
Okay.
First of all, if I were pregnant, that would be my secret.
And second of all, I'm late, not pregnant.
And how did you know that? When I went to visit you in Providence, you had your period which means you should have had it again, but the box of tampons that you bought two weeks ago hasn't even been opened.
Summer, have you had unsafe sex? - There was that time where Seth visited - Summer.
I didn't want the pharmaceutical companies playing with my eggs.
- Well, what about condoms? - Latex smells funny.
- So do diapers.
- Taylor! Don't pretend you're not worried about this, because you've been preoccupied all day.
I am not pregnant.
Well, prove it.
- Get that away from me.
- Hey, you decent? Seth, actually, Summer and I were Just having a little girl time.
- Just come back in 15 - So good to see you.
Hey.
Wow, look at all this affection, and I haven't even told you my surprise yet.
Though, to be fair, it's really more of Ryan's surprise.
But yes, the four of us are going to Las vegas.
Ryan is in the car waiting.
Ryan's taking me to vegas? And I am taking you, Mrs.
What-Are-Our-Plans-For-New-Year's? Why don't you get packed so we can go? Summer and I need to dash into the bathroom really quick.
- That is a great idea.
The best idea ever.
- I know.
- You help me pick out what to bring.
- Okay.
Okay, well, I'm Just going to pack this toothpaste because we might want it in vegas.
Hey, Ryan, can we stop soon? Summer and I have to pee.
Oh, yeah? Sure.
Next chance we get, I'll get some gas.
Great.
Summer, I think when we stop, we should try out our new toothpaste.
Breath's a little stale.
Ryan, are you ready for a sandwich? Listen, I know we're crashing, but I promise you, as soon as we get to vegas l'm gonna buy you the best room Sandy Cohen's money can buy.
You're rescuing me, and I wanna pay you back.
Yeah, all right.
Hey, Seth, hypothetically speaking, if I was your girlfriend and I had health issues, would you wanna know about them? - I don't know.
What kind of health issues? - Diarrhea of the mouth.
Can we Just, like, stop talking and turn the music up and Just drive, please? Summer, there is something in your hair.
Let me get it out for you.
- What are you doing? - I think you need to tell Seth.
- No, I don't think he can handle it.
- How do you know? Oh, crap.
I forgot my toothbrush.
I'm gonna have to use my finger.
See? He is a child.
- What kind of toothpaste did you get? - Seth, no, can you not? - Is this? - Mine.
My toothpaste.
- What's going on? - Nothing.
It's Just this is extra whitening, and Seth needs tartar control.
Badly.
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
Mom? Okay, coast is clear, dude.
Yeah, she's probably still at work.
You sure we did the right thing by not buying that little number with rhinestones? You asked me for my help to pick out a dress for my mother, so trust me.
Well, I Just wanna make sure she feels like a million dollars at my party tonight.
That's assuming she finishes work on time.
Offered to get someone in there to help the woman out, she flat-out refused me.
You really like her, don't you? Oh, yeah, peanut.
She's under my skin.
The whole time I was in Riyadh, didn't once try to peek under a girl's burka.
So, what you got going on tonight? Well, I was supposed to talk to my dad, but his boat's out of cell-phone range.
So whatever.
It's no big.
Well, dang, girl, if you're free, why not come to my party? Because I'm 40? No, because it's New Year's Eve, and I got not one prince, but two coming.
William and Harry? Samir and Abas.
Saudis.
About your age, and not a bad catch if you don't mind raisins in your chicken.
You like two-stepping? It's a dance we do in Texas.
I can show you tonight.
You can hold your breath for that.
All right, well, I appreciate your help.
You take care now.
Ignore her.
- Come again? - She refused your help, so ignore her.
It's what I always do.
- Here you go.
- And what's this for? In case you change your mind, come to the party you might wanna buy a dress or a lollipop or something.
Yo, Frank.
Yeah, Bullit.
What's going on this afternoon? It's up to you.
- You'll be there when I take it? - Of course.
Let's go.
Will somebody get me something to drink? Will you get me something to drink? - Thanks.
- Hey, is everything all right? You were acting kind of strange in the car.
Okay, I Just wanted to, you know, apologixe.
I know this trip to vegas was supposed to be us but Seth hiJacked it to get out of the doghouse, so, what are you gonna do? Yeah, I know.
Anyway, you know, he's getting us a room.
So at least we'll be alone.
Yeah, I don't think that we should do that.
- In fact, I know that we shouldn't.
- What are you talking about? Look, obviously, we both thought that we were going to It's vegas, and there's lingerie.
And it would be great, trust me.
But I Just want our first time to be special.
And tonight is Just not the night.
Okay? Sorry.
I gotta go.
I have a question.
And let's pretend I wasn't eavesdropping.
Are you absolutely positive that you haven't had sex yet with Taylor? Not even like a "I feel guilty about this because you're kind of wasted but how did that happen" mistake? Okay, I'll take that as a no.
Hey, look at that.
Green alien.
That's craxy.
Well, these windows aren't gonna wash themselves.
Seth, what's going on? Okay, "Remove the test stick from the foil wrapper.
" Did that already.
"Position the stick with the test windows facing away from the urine stream and place the absorbent tip under the stream of urine.
" Stream of urine, Summer.
You need something? Oh, no.
Thank you.
- Who is it? - A slutty alien.
Did you pee? - I'll go outside.
- Wait, wait, don't leave me.
- May I help you? - You must be Julie.
And you are? I told you she was hot.
Julie, meet my buddy Frank.
He's gonna put your books in order.
- Didn't I say no to this? - Oh, yes, you did.
A little birdie told me to ignore you, that's what I'm doing.
- Gordon - Is no longer willing to negotiate.
Let's let Frank do his thing.
Meantime, let's get you out of that Pilgrim outfit and into a ball gown, which I happen to have bought you.
And, Frank, if you get finished by midnight, you come play with us, you hear? I will.
Oh, Julie it's nice meeting you.
- Nice meeting you too, Frank.
- Come on, sweetie.
- Why are the girls acting so strange? - Dude, I don't You know - Twelve more seconds, 11.
- What if there wasn't enough pee? - Ten seconds.
- Here, let's switch.
- How many bars am I looking for? - Two bars.
- Four more seconds.
- I can't look.
- Three more seconds, two, one.
- I can't do it.
Just take it.
Don't look at it.
- I can't breathe.
- Okay, I won't.
- Sit down.
Sit down, sit down.
- Okay.
- I can't breathe.
- Here, breathe.
Breathe into this.
Breathe, deep breaths.
Look, I'm not gonna make you do anything, it's totally your decision.
But whatever you do, it doesn't change the truth.
And in a few hours, it's gonna be the new year.
Do you wanna start that year as an adult with your eyes wide open, or with your head in the sand? Give it to me.
- Oh, my God.
- What? - It's gone.
- What? - I don't believe it.
- Do you think she cheated on you? No, I mean, I can't believe she didn't tell me.
I'll watch the car if you wanna go smash something.
Like maybe that big green bug.
Hey.
Excuse me.
L Follow that alien, she stole my purse.
- What? - She Just stole my purse.
- What? - Get in the car.
She Just stole it from underneath the stall.
Seth, hurry up.
She's right there! Go! Ryan, go.
Go.
Jeex.
Can't we Just buy you a new purse and cancel your credit cards? - No, we need that purse.
- Why? - Because - Of the pills that I have in there.
For the allergy I have, but never told you guys about.
It's nothing serious.
She needs to take the pills before midnight.
Right.
And since we are in the middle of the desert and nowhere near a pharmacy it has to be the pills in that purse.
Sorry.
- You're being awfully quiet.
- There's a lot of that going around.
Hey, I see brake lights.
- What is this place? - Looks like some kind of a party.
Did anyone get a look at her face? She's an alien.
It's not an easy thing to lose in a crowd.
- I don't believe it.
- Everyone is an alien.
Hey, we're gonna go this way.
Okay, we'll go this way.
Wait, I wanna stay with Summer.
Come on, I promised you some alone time.
Hey.
- Hey.
- Spencer, let me ask you a question.
When you paired these ladies up with their dates did you know they were coming to this party? You don't think Kirsten's gonna smell something fishy? No.
No, I think we're taking the fish and slapping her in the face with it.
- She knows these women are our clients.
- She won't notice.
Isn't she an alcoholic? Recovering, unfortunately.
So did you find anything out about Frank? Not a lot.
He's a friend of my dad's.
I'm not sure where they met.
He took the Series 7 a month ago, but before that, nothing.
He doesn't exist.
So, what do you think? I'm thinking maybe CIA or Special Ops.
No, Deep Throat, I mean, what do you think we should do? Does he seem like someone we can bribe? I wouldn't bank on it.
My dad's big on loyalty.
Speaking of, where is he anyway? He's over there introducing Kaitlin to some Saudi princes.
This is Samir, and I call him Sam.
And this is Abas, and I call him Boss.
- And you are Kaitland? - Kaitlin.
- Kaitlin.
- Kaitlin.
- Yeah.
- Kaitland.
Okay, Kaitland.
He says there's no coat check and there's no one really in charge.
Then he invited me to party on his asteroid, which I think means his trailer.
We should find Seth and Summer, make sure they're okay.
Taylor, I know.
Seth told me.
Told you what? You know, it.
The thing.
- Okay, let me explain - I Just wish that you told me.
That's what I'm mad about.
Not other stuff, Just that you kept it from me.
Wait, what other stuff? You know, that you were sleeping with someone before we started dating.
- Who says? - Well, the math says.
- But I'm not mad about that.
- I knew you felt this way.
- I'm not accusing you of anything.
- Yes, you are.
You're saying that I had random, unsafe sex with someone in between my annulment and us making out.
Do you know how many days that was? You were sleeping with someone while we dated? - Is that what you think? - No! But if you were, I couldn't be mad, we weren't exclusive.
Right.
And why would you wanna be since you clearly think I am a big, fat divorcee whore? Oh, my God.
- Julie.
- Hi.
Hey, where's Sandy? - Julie, what's going on? - What do you mean? All our clients here are on dates with people that look like they're college students.
Weren't we supposed to set up Jessica Rogers with Dr.
Buxton? Yeah, we were, but she called yesterday and said she met someone.
- That's love.
- Hello, Julie.
Frank, you're here.
Frank, this is Kirsten Cohen, my partner.
- This is Frank - Perry.
Frank Perry.
Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.
- Frank Perry.
Right.
Bullit hired him to put our books in order.
That's what he's been doing all night so that I could be here.
Does everything add up? Yep.
Looks good.
And business seems to be booming.
So if I had a drink, I would toast you.
Well, I'll take it anyway.
Thank you.
All right, ladies.
As you were.
Kirsten, a pleasure to meet you.
Kiki, do you ever feel invincible? - Why? - No reason.
Happy New Year, sweetie.
Remind me again why we're looking for a purse when the larger issue seems to be Taylor thinking she has a baby inside of her.
Don't give me anything about any allergy pills.
I'm not buying it.
We need the purse because the pregnancy test is in it.
The test we've taken and haven't looked at.
The test that we need to see so we can start 2007 knowing exactly where we stand.
Can I interrupt you? I'm remembering something I wanted to ask before when I found out the test was Taylor's.
What? Paw.
- Up top.
- Are you asking me for a high-five? Lmagine if it was your test we were looking for.
It seems a little bit selfish, but I think we're entitled to celebrate.
So come on.
Up top, hit it.
Hit it.
God, Seth.
Oh, God.
Oh, my God.
It's really you.
Seth Cohen, I saw you at Comic-Con years ago.
I'm a huge, huge, huge Atomic County fan.
- Thanks.
Thanks a lot.
- Check it out, man, I'm Kid Chino.
That is fantastic.
I'm looking for my - We gotta take a picture, man.
- Oh, okay.
This is the greatest night of my life, Mr.
Cohen.
- Thanks a lot.
Hey - Smile.
It's the alien.
- Thanks a lot.
- Thanks, man.
See you.
I didn't wanna embarrass you in front of your partner but your so-called dating service it's not exactly what Bullit thought he was investing in, is it? Why don't you wet your lips? Your mouth looks dry.
- Kaitland? - What? We are boring you, yes? Maybe it will be more pleasing to you if we make kissing to each other.
Yeah, you guys go do that.
Okay, so Just what do I have to do to keep you quiet? Suite 522 at the Four Seasons.
Say, half an hour.
Oh, there you are.
How's your client? Darryl? Well, he's better off than the parking meter he beheaded.
I sent him to a shelter.
How's your night been? Oh, it's Just odd.
Julie's acting strange and We have clients here, Just not with the dates that we set them up with.
- Lf I'm a little tense, I apologixe.
- Come on.
- Let's work it out on the dance floor.
- Yeah.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- No, my fault.
Sandy Cohen.
- Frank Perry.
- Frank works for Bullit.
- Oh, is that right? - Yeah, the big bang himself.
Well, it was nice bumping into you.
And Happy New Year.
You too.
- Sandy, something wrong? - I feel like I know that guy from somewhere.
Come on, how about that dance? - Hey there, Miss Galump.
How are you? - Gordon.
- Good to see you.
- Hi, Bullit.
- Hey now.
EnJoy yourself.
- Hi.
Mom, aren't you gonna stay for midnight? Oh, Kaitlin, your mom has a headache.
But you should stay.
Have Bullit give you a ride home.
This doesn't have anything to do with that creepy guy, does it? - What creepy guy? - The guy I saw you talking to.
You're gonna go meet him, aren't you? This is not what you think.
But please, you can't tell Bullit about this.
- Mom, he really likes you.
- And I really like him too.
It Just You have to trust me on this, okay? - Okay.
- Happy New Year, baby.
Mom? I miss dad sometimes.
I know, honey.
We'll call him tomorrow, okay? Okay.
- Taylor.
- Hey, Ryan.
What are you doing? Let's go.
If you think I'm a whore, I'm gonna act like a whore.
I don't, but I don't think you should be drinking.
Why? Because I might be pregnant? - Give me that.
- Hey.
Give that back before I atomixe your face.
- How about you Just back off? - What's going on? What are you doing? Figuring out why my girlfriend's taking pregnancy tests and I'm the last to find out.
How's that possible? Because it's not hers, okay? It's mine.
- It's my test that is in Taylor's purse.
- What? Great.
This is great.
Now I'm not gonna know if I'm pregnant before midnight.
Nothing like starting a new year with something like this hanging over your head.
- Happy New Year, Ryan.
- Ryan.
- Dude.
It's Summer's.
- Seven, six, five - I know.
Come on, let's go.
four, three, two, one! Wait a minute.
Summer.
- Hey! - Wait! All right, thanks.
Nearest cab company's in Baker.
What do you wanna do now? Oh, curl up into the fetal position and weep.
Although, perhaps, the unborn-baby metaphor Not really appropriate.
I cannot believe Summer might be pregnant.
Oh, my God.
Seth.
Don't worry, Summer.
I'm sure we'll pass a 24-hour pharmacy at some point.
The symbolism window closed at midnight.
- We'll do it in the morning.
- Okay.
Taylor, I really appreciate everything you did for me today.
I really hope I didn't cause any permanent damage with you and Ryan.
Don't worry about me.
Please.
How did I get here? How did I go from being an lvy League Al Gore in the making to a knocked-up college dropout with a boyfriend that forgets to pack his toothbrush when he travels? How did this happen? You know what, it's a new year.
We all get a fresh start.
Okay? You and me and Seth and Ryan.
We can all be whatever we wanna be.
And everything negative will be left in last year.
- What's my name? - Zerk-nong.
- Spell it.
- Z-U - E.
- Oh, Z-E-R-K-N - Hyphen.
- Hyphen N- O-N-G.
- Right.
Right.
It was mean leaving them there, wasn't it? Yeah.
Yeah.
I'll call them, see if they're okay.
I need to borrow your phone, I left mine in my purse.
- Now, what does that spell? - Zerk-nong.
- Again.
- Zerk-nong.
Good girl.
- Oh, my God.
- Run! - Hey, Mr.
Cohen! - Hey! - Hey - These alien chicks are really easy.
- We need an emergency evacuation.
- You got it.
Hey, too bad we don't have Little Miss vixen's magic scooter - We have to go! - He stole my purse! - All set? - What? - Still thinking about Frank? - I can't shake the feeling that I know him.
I wish you did.
I'd love to know who Julie has going through our books.
- She never said where Bullit found him? - Knowing Bullit, it could be anywhere.
The golf course, Saudi Arabia, prison.
You gonna follow me home? Yeah.
No, I'm gonna swing by the homeless shelter, make sure Darryl made it there.
- You sure? - Yeah, I won't be long.
You Just say where you want us to drop you off, Mr.
Cohen.
Girls and I are honored to be helping out.
Look, as scared as you are, I'm sure Summer's 10 times more scared.
- Translation, I need to be there for her.
- Exactly.
And you can start by telling her how you feel.
Well, it kind of depends on what's in this purse.
Does it? Is it gonna change whether or not you wanna be with her? No, of course not.
And can you imagine ever not wanting to be with her? No.
That's your answer.
Hey, great party.
Thank you, peanut.
How'd it go with the Saudis? Well, they wanna fly me over to Dubai for their prom but I said there's no way I wanna wear one of those Klan outfits.
Don't blame you.
Have you seen your mother? I've been looking for her.
She went home.
She had a migraine.
Dang.
I wish she'd have told me.
Well, I hope she's okay.
So, what was that dance that you were talking to me about this afternoon? The one with the number.
That'd be the Texas two-step.
- Can you show it to me? - Is the pope Catholic? Oh, come on, lucky lady, it's your night.
Here we go.
Ready? And it's one-two, one-two, back step.
One-two, one-two.
Texas two-step, you got it.
And you're turning.
You're turning.
Come on.
Turn this way.
Attagirl.
- I nearly lost you.
- Yes.
If you're here for sex, there's like five guys ahead of you.
Okay, look, I'm sorry if I Jumped to conclusions tonight.
You can't be paranoid about being divorced or any of it.
It doesn't mean anything to me.
So you don't think I'm a whore? No.
No, no, of course not.
Good.
Because I'm not.
Unless, of course, you want me to be.
Is that my negligee? - Well, I want that back.
- Come on.
Before I change my mind.
- All right, but Just to be clear - Everything but.
Come here.
Staring at that bunny thinking of a baby, aren't you? I'm sorry I abandoned you in the desert.
I deserved it.
And it worked out kind of well too.
I found something that I thought might interest you.
- Oh, my God.
- But I wanna say something first.
When I found out it was your pregnancy test, I totally freaked out.
And I thought this will change everything.
But then Ryan asked me if I could imagine a time when I'd ever not wanna be with you, and I realixed that the answer is no.
- I'm totally pregnant, aren't I? - I don't know.
What do you mean you don't know? Is that gonna squirt invisible ink or something? No, but it will make you engaged to me.
What? Are you insane? Possibly, but I'm certain of this.
No, Cohen, we can't.
We can.
We're both adults, we don't share DNA.
- But - You Just have to want to.
I do.
Don't you think we should look first? And have you wonder if I proposed to you because you're pregnant? I'm doing this because I love you and I wanna spend the rest of my life with you.
- Once you do this, you can't take it back.
- I know.
Summer Roberts, will you marry me? Yes, I'll marry you.
All right.
Okay.
So should we look at the test now? Sure.
Let's see what's in store for the future Mr.
And Mrs.
Seth Cohen.
- How many bars is that? - One.
What's that mean? One means I am not pregnant.
I'm not pregnant.
Is it inappropriate to celebrate? No.
Please, please.
Saves us from having to have a shotgun wedding.
Now we can Just have a normal one instead.
Yeah, you and me and our normal wedding.
- Should we hug again? - Okay.
Okay.
- Have a seat.
- I'm not trading sex for silence, Frank.
I may be a madam, but I'm not a whore.
Good to know.
But that's not why I brought you here.
- It's not? - Sit down.
- So why did you bring me here? - For information.
Information about what? About the Cohen family.
Why? Because I'm not who I say I am.
And who are you? I'm Ryan's father.