Marvel's Avengers Assemble (2013) s04e09 Episode Script

The Once and Future Kang

1 [CHATTERING.]
[GROWLING.]
[CHATTERING.]
[GASPS.]
[GROWLING CONTINUES.]
[ROARING.]
[PEOPLE SHOUTING, SCREAMING.]
[WHIMPERING.]
[ROARING.]
Avengers Assemble! [GRUNTS.]
[THUNDEROUS BELCH.]
Aah! Gross! You belch on me, and I will turn you inside out! [GROWLING.]
Press the attack.
Do not give it a chance to recover.
One press, coming up! [GRUNTS.]
Oh! Right in the toes.
Captain Marvel! I see her, Black Panther.
Keep the monster busy down here.
[SCREAMING.]
Ms.
Marvel, Vision, get those civilians to safety.
Go! I will keep the monster off of you, like so! [GRUNTS.]
This'll be close.
[PEOPLE YELL.]
[GROWLING.]
I'm gonna hit you right between the [YELLING.]
[SIGHS.]
Thanks for the save, Wasp.
Don't thank me yet, Ant-Man.
Better hold on to your lunch! You're gonna be okay, little girl.
Oh.
My sign language is a little rusty.
[COMPUTER TRILLING.]
Hi, Jen.
Nothing to be scared of.
My name is Carol.
[BEEPS.]
Not sure, huh? Here.
This makes you my copilot.
What do you say? Attagirl.
Okay, everybody, we're getting you outta here.
[GRUNTS.]
You got something in your eye.
Come on, Avengers! I think we can take that monster down! [BOTH GRUNT.]
I think the monster has other ideas.
That thing's a jerk, and one way or another, it's gonna go down! [GRUNTING.]
Follow me, please.
Over here.
Perfect.
Thank you.
[GRUNTS.]
And he's out! [SINGSONGY.]
Hello? Yep, he's out.
[HIGH-PITCHED GROWLING.]
You can't ever leave the Avengers, because you make cleanup so easy.
So, what exactly is that thing? - And how did it get here? - It was an accident.
Dr.
Foster, you were responsible for this? I was trying to open a door to another dimension, because I was looking for the missing Avengers.
And I found them.
The Avengers are alive? Are you sure? I'm almost certain of it.
I discovered a way to back-trace their energy signature through space-time.
But sending you to them will be risky.
Doesn't matter.
Send us.
Because risky or not, we're bringing the Avengers back.
These tethers are your lifeline back.
Find the missing Avengers, then activate the tethers to come home.
Each of you will be sent across space and time [WRIST DEVICES BEEPING.]
to one of the missing Avengers.
Find the missing Avengers, make physical contact, then use your tether to bring them home.
[WHIRRING.]
Don't activate your tether until you've found them.
You will only have one shot at this.
One shot is all we're gonna need.
We're gonna find our friends and bring 'em home.
All right, Avengers.
Let's do it.
[WHIRRING.]
[WHIRRING STOPS.]
Okay, Vision.
Looks like it's you and me.
- Whoa.
[GRUNTS.]
- Vision! Hmm.
Strange.
My systems should be functioning normally, but I am feeling a bit off.
I suggest remaining covert until we're able to assess the situation.
I'm just gonna go for a quick look.
Wasp, while it may in fact appear safe, I strongly urge a more discreet tactic in our reconnoiter.
I appreciate the concern.
It's kind of sweet.
- But we're fine.
- But Huh.
Not a single light on anywhere.
City's deserted.
Whoa! That's weird.
Now my suit's functions are slow to respond.
As if something is interfering with the technology in our systems.
Huh? Kang.
Kang.
Kang.
[BOTH GROANING.]
Kang.
Kang.
Kang.
Kang! Or at least Kang's head.
Kang.
A giant floating head.
That's never a good look.
[GRUNTS.]
[ELECTRONIC TONE BLEARING.]
[GRUNTS.]
[GROANS.]
[MECHANICAL HUMMING.]
Hey, Kang head! Heads up! [CRASH.]
Yeah! I gotcha! [SHUDDERS.]
I didn't think these things could look any creepier.
Wasp, another incoming.
[ELECTRONIC TONE BLARING.]
[BOTH GRUNT.]
Vision, you gotta get up.
Vision! Outta my way, chumps! [GRUNTS.]
Who are you calling chumps? Oh, pardon me.
Chumps and chumpette.
Red Hulk.
Vision and Wasp.
'Bout time some other heroes showed up.
[GRUNTS.]
Yeah, that's gonna leave a mark.
[POWERING DOWN.]
[BEEPING.]
Oh, for the love of - Five.
Four.
- I really hate it when they self-destruct.
- Three.
Two.
- Hope you two don't cry easy.
One.
[RED HULK GRUNTS.]
[VISION, WASP YELL.]
[GRUNTS.]
We appear to remain functional.
- Where are we? - And when are we? Great.
Knew it was only a matter of time with old Kangy that some time-traveling nonsense would go on.
Better follow me.
[GROANS.]
[BUZZING.]
Wasn't expecting company.
Welcome to the man cave.
Good thing I tidied up the place last night, huh? We're underground where Kang can't find us.
As for your second question, you're in the future.
Kang showed up a few years ago.
Conquered New York, took out all the tech in the city, and ran everyone out.
- Everyone but you? - Ha! [GRUNTS.]
No one runs me out.
[LAUGHING.]
You say Kang took out all the technology? Yep.
Kang's good at all that kind of crud.
That would explain my current weakness.
Whatever affects technology is affecting me.
It's effecting me, too, but not as bad.
[CRUNCHING.]
Hungry? [CHITTERING.]
- Do we look hungry to you? - Ha! More for me.
[CHOMPS.]
Okay, my turn to ask the questions.
What are you kids doing time traveling in my neck of the woods? Kang was part of a Cabal that snatched the Avengers.
We think Kang must've taken at least one of the Avengers here.
Have you seen any Avengers here? Or other heroes? Mm, forget it, sparky.
Mm.
Hasn't been an Avenger seen here in years.
Since Kang showed up.
Everyone else is long gone.
You're looking at the only hero New York has left.
Are you sure? Not Captain America? - Nope.
- Not Hulk? - Nuh-uh.
- Not Falcon? Falcon? He's no Avenger! He's worse than Kang! Huh? [WHIRRING.]
Oh, no.
[ALL GRUNT.]
Ow! It can't be.
Falcon, is that you? Falcon, what are you doing? Huh! Nice try.
[GRUNTS, GROANS.]
[FALCON GRUNTING.]
Been saving this to use on you, bird boy! [GRUNTS.]
[YELLS.]
Bah! He's running away.
No.
He's looking for room to fight.
He appears to have found it.
[GRUNTS.]
[GRUNTS.]
Kang's looking forward to meeting you again.
[GRUNTING.]
Back off, Falcon! [BOTH GRUNT.]
What is this, some kind of trick? How can you be working for Kang? You sound just like But that's impossible! Gotcha! You lose, traitor.
[GROANS.]
[GROANING.]
I don't have time for this.
[ALL YELL.]
[GROANING.]
You're coming with me.
[BOTH GROAN.]
He got Vision.
That's not the Falcon we knew.
- He's changed.
- Yep.
[GROANING.]
Huh? Feeling better? As a matter of fact, I am.
Tech dampeners are out in the city, but not here in the castle.
I can't believe it's really you.
After all these years.
I suppose you're wondering why I'm working for Kang.
I admit that is a concern of mine.
It's hard to explain.
Easier to show you.
It's invisible, but you should be able to see it through this filter.
A singularity.
That is most disturbing.
All of Kang's time traveling caused a rip in the universe.
Now, in a couple of hours, that black hole is gonna destroy the Earth.
This is why you work for Kang? This is why Kang brought me to the future.
We made a deal.
I help Kang save the world, and Kang let the people of New York leave in peace.
So everyone left, except for Red Hulk.
He thinks Kang is just out to conquer the world.
Red Hulk.
That insufferable brute makes it hard to not destroy the entire city just to have a moment's peace.
But a deal is a deal.
Speaking of, you are infringing upon ours by bringing in this distraction.
Vision's not a distraction.
His computing power can help us.
And we're running out of options and time.
Now it makes sense, doesn't it? Why Kang the Conqueror would deign to join a Cabal.
With Iron Man gone, I needed Falcon's skills to save the world.
Records indicate that you are not exactly known for being noble.
My survival is intrinsically tied to the survival of the Earth, as is yours.
You would do well to remember that.
Clock's ticking.
I cannot imagine what it must've been like trapped for years in the future.
I am sorry it took us so long to find you.
It hasn't been all bad.
I learned a lot.
Maybe more than I could have with the Avengers.
Kang taught me forms of combat that haven't been invented yet.
I built new weapons.
I grew up.
I changed.
I just don't know if it's for the better.
I trust Kang.
But I know I shouldn't.
Makes me think I can't trust myself anymore.
You are still Falcon.
My scans indicate that, other than aging, you are exactly the same person you were before.
Yeah, and who is that? An Avenger.
[WASP.]
Security everywhere.
Kang has got the entire city on lockdown.
Still think I should've scouted ahead before trying this.
I don't have time for what you think.
I'm gonna get Kang.
But first I'm gonna get Falcon.
[GRUNTS.]
Don't hurt Falcon.
If it's really him, we're gonna rescue him and bring him home.
[GROWLS.]
Whatever.
My mission is to destroy Kang and anyone else who gets in my way.
- But Falcon - I appreciate your concern.
It's kind of sweet.
But I can't concentrate with all your yapping! Rerouting energy from the generators.
If this works, this will cage the black hole, sealing its energy and stopping it from destroying the Earth.
Quickly.
Time runs short.
You promised me, Kang.
If I pull this off and save the world? You do this, and I will return to my own time, to never time travel again.
We are nearly out of time.
You better believe you're outta time.
[YELLING.]
[RED HULK YELLING.]
No! You're going to ruin everything! Vision? You are making a mistake! Oh, so you're on his side, too, huh? [GROWLS.]
Uh, what exactly is happening? The generators! They're gonna incinerate us all! Everything's gonna blow! Vision, I'm cutting the flow and reducing generator intensity! Then I will stabilize the generators from the inside.
[BEEPING.]
He did it.
The generator levels are back to normal.
All the android did was stall our own demise if we don't succeed in caging the black hole.
Now's my chance.
Ow! Hey! Haven't you done enough already? Now cool it and start paying attention to what people have to say for a change! [GROWLING.]
I didn't do a good job listening to you earlier.
Now give me the short version of what's happening.
Kang, Falcon, and I are trying to save the Earth.
That is how long we have until the end of the world.
[RED HULK.]
That's it? Are you kidding me? [BEEPING.]
And there's that.
[ELECTRICITY ARCING.]
Criminy.
We're seconds away from a zero-matter event horizon.
We must contain this now.
We are all well aware of that.
Please try to remain levelheaded as best possible.
We're out of time! One last chance! Hit it! The zero-matter event has been averted.
[SIGHS.]
Ha! You eggheads did it.
Not that I doubted ya, but I gotta say [GRUNTS.]
[CHUCKLES.]
Now and forevermore, Kang's power is as infinite as time itself.
Saving the Earth just so you could conquer it.
This is bigger than the Earth.
This is about time.
I now possess a wormhole in a box.
Stronger, more reliable method of time travel, without the negative side effects.
The universe is mine to conquer, wherever and whenever I choose.
Kang, you don't have to do this.
You've been a capable lieutenant these past few years.
Join me.
Together we could subjugate the entire universe.
I thought I knew you.
Oh, you're unbearably naive.
Now gaze upon greatness for the last time.
[LAUGHING.]
[POWERING DOWN.]
Huh? I may be naive, but I'm not stupid.
I installed tech dampeners to keep you from using it.
And as for greatness, you're about to find out just how great a teacher you are.
[GRUNTS.]
You insufferable Aah! Ya miss me? [YELLING.]
[GRUNTS, GROANS.]
Kang never misses.
- Oh, please! Brag much? - Hm? [GRUNTS.]
[GRUNTS.]
It's not bragging when it's fact.
Wasp! [GRUNTS, GROANS.]
It's just us, my pupil.
You still have things to learn.
Lesson one kneel before Kang! [BOTH GRUNTING.]
[GROWLS.]
I've had all the lessons from you I need.
I didn't teach you everything.
[GRUNTS.]
[BOTH GRUNTING.]
I'm not your pupil anymore.
I'm not even a kid anymore! [YELLING.]
[GRUNTS.]
[GRUNTS.]
[GROANS.]
The student got the better of the master.
How amusing.
You lost, Kang.
Not to your student or your henchman or a sidekick.
To an Avenger.
Lose? Did I? The true power behind the Cabal is coming.
He'll take care of things.
In the end, Kang is [CRIES OUT.]
[GRUNTS.]
That oughta shut your yapper.
Told ya.
No supervillain takes over my New York City.
All the people they're coming out of hiding.
Now that Kang's locked up, we're gonna rebuild.
People aren't afraid anymore.
You're welcome.
Huh? All right.
Fine.
Eh, all right.
Fine.
Put 'er there.
[GRUNTING.]
[BONES CRACK.]
Knock it off! You androids and your feelings.
Thanks for coming all this way, even though I'm not the Falcon you were looking for.
What's everyone gonna say when they meet the new me? Does it matter how others see you? It's about how you see yourself.
[FALCON.]
A new day for everyone.
Let's go home.
[BYSTANDERS MURMURING, EXCLAIMING.]
[CHUCKLES.]

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