Party of Five s04e09 Episode Script
Truth Be Told
What are you doing here? I was in the neighborhood.
Thought you might need a lift.
No, that's ok.
Well, sometimes Reed gives me a ride on his way over to Griffin's, so Why don't I catch you later at home? Are you serious? Get in the car, claud.
Come on, Charlie.
Get in the car.
Look, um, as long as we're alone, I wanted to talk to you about something, something that's been going on with me.
I haven't told the others yet.
I wanted to tell you first.
I'm kinda, um It turns out I've got this this thing, this disease thing.
What, like v.
D.
Or something? Charlie.
No, it's not It's nothing like that.
It's called hodgkin's.
Hodgkin's, I don't It's a disease of the lymphatic system, and sometimes it turns up in guys about my age.
That's why I've been feeling so, you know, kinda draggy and run down for the past few weeks.
I thought that was no big deal.
I know.
Me, too, but I went to see the doctor, and she diagnosed it right away, which is great because if it's caught early, which mine definitely was, then this thing's, like, 100% curable.
It's, like, 100% curable or it is 100% curable? I'm going to be fine, Claudia.
Ok? I'm going to have to have some treatments and stuff, which just means going into the doctor's office every day for, like, 5 minutes.
For what, medicine? Yeah.
Pretty much.
They just want to make sure that you're getting the right dosage.
It takes 6 weeks, and then it's over.
I'm totally back to normal.
You know what the doctor told me? She said that if you have to have a disease, hodgkin's is definitely one of the best ones to have.
That's pretty reassuring, huh? Ok.
How does ice cream sound? Everybody wants to live like they wanna live and everybody wants to love Like they wanna love everybody wants to be closer to free-ee-ee-ee closer to free Hey.
Hey, man.
I got your message.
I was just on my way in when it occurred to me.
Do you have a plane? Yeah, somewhere.
'Cause we just put some carpeting down in Annie's bedroom 'cause Annie's bedroom is directly above Sarah's bedroom, and, well, you get the picture.
Anyway, it's this cheapo shag, so now we can't close any of the doors.
Hello.
Here we go.
Charlie? Hey, man, it's cool with you if I borrow this? Cool.
Thank you.
So, what was up with that message you left? What did you need to talk about? Is everything ok? Is Owen No, it's not Owen.
Uh, I just i just wanted you to know about something that's going on with me, that's all.
You ok? Um You might you might want to sit down.
Ok, I'm sitting.
What what's going on? Ok.
Boy, I'm telling you.
You can't beat renting, huh? Live like a king.
Am I right? At least for a little while.
Dining room set, kitchen set, and the bedroom set.
All right, you guys, let's go.
Let's get busy.
God.
We'll find something else, ok, jule? As soon as I get my shop turned around.
Griffin Stop, ok? You don't have to promise me anything.
I'm sorry.
Forget it, ok? It's not it's not Nina's fault.
It was just It was bad timing.
Anyway, I have more important things to worry about.
I know.
I know you do.
I have my first appointment tomorrow with the oncologist.
What are they What is that? I don't know exactly.
All kinds of tests Some scan thing that tells them where it is in your body, which lymph nodes, you know? I guess that pretty much determines how bad it is, what kind of treatments you're going to need.
God, Charlie.
I know.
But this isn't actually happening to me.
So that's the reason I'm so calm.
Can i Can I come with you? Tomorrow to the appointment? Kirsten, you don't have to 'cause I feel really bad, Charlie.
I feel like I keep leaving you at all the most important times.
But I promise you, in 2 weeks, all this is going to be over, and I'm going to be here for anything that you need.
Ok.
'Cause you don't have to do this alone.
I'm not.
I'm not.
I haven't told Julia yet, but I told Bailey and Claudia.
They were both great.
Of course they were.
What did you expect? I don't know.
I guess I thought maybe they'd panic, freak out or something, I don't know.
I mean, Claudia's only 14.
She's old enough.
Yeah, she is.
Excuse me.
I think these pamphlets you gave me are kind of out of date.
I'm sorry? Well, the statistics on survival rates are kind of off.
So I just don't think they have the most recent scientific advances.
I need your absolute latest information.
This is the latest information.
About hodgkin's disease.
Yes.
Is there something you're looking for that you're not finding? No.
That's ok.
Charlie? Hi, jule.
You got here fast, huh? What? Well, I left you a message.
Oh, I, uh, I didn't get it.
That's ok.
I just, uh, just said I needed to talk to you, and you're here, so Well, I need to talk to you, too.
Ok.
So we're both Charlie, can I borrow some kitchen stuff? Kitchen stuff? Yeah, you know, just a pot and some silverware and stuff.
Everything that we had was rented, and we had to return it.
So I'm sorry.
I'm not Griffin lost most of his money.
The business was really bad, and so he had to borrow to keep it going.
And we have to give up the apartment, and we've returned our furniture, and we're living in this empty space, and it's actually kind of horrible.
Look, take whatever you need.
Why don't you come live at home? Having you at home right now would be God! No, that that is the last thing we want.
I mean, the whole point to this is that we do this on our own.
I know.
I know that.
I mean, all I'm saying is that everyone needs a little help every once in a while, and if it makes it easier for you guys, I can really use Stop it.
Charlie, ok? I'm not coming home.
Griffin and I will work this out ourselves like any married couple.
I just i told you because you've been really great, and you have a right to know.
Thanks for the stuff.
You're welcome.
Oh, um, you had something you wanted to talk about? Nah, you got enough on your mind right now.
Ok.
That is so Bailey, I don't know what to say.
Yeah, well I mean, he seems so Even last week at the wedding, he seemed so I know.
Cancer? Yeah, cancer.
Do you think he's going to be ok? I mean, Bailey, he's got to be ok.
I don't know.
What can I do? Nothing.
He's not it's not like you guys are close or anything.
Well, yeah, but I want to do something to help if he needs something.
Well, then, he's got Claudia, Julia, or me to get it for him.
Look, Sarah, this is a family thing, ok? And we're good at this kind of stuff.
He's got us.
So thanks anyway.
Charlie.
Charlie.
Shh.
I finally got Owen to go down.
I went to the medical center today.
I looked it up.
Looked up what? It's not just a disease.
Hodgkin's It's cancer.
Claudia Isn't it?! Would you keep your voice down? It's a kind of cancer, Claudia, yes, but Only you didn't want me to know that, did you? I didn't think you needed to hear that word.
What about the words "radiation" and "chemotherapy," huh? 'Cause those are the treatments that you were talking about, isn't it? I didn't want to scare you.
So, in other words It's bad.
Yeah, I mean, it must be bad, or you would've leveled with me.
You said it's cancer, and one in 4 people who get it die from it.
But you didn't.
You said it's 100% curable.
And then You bought me an ice cream.
Claudia, come on.
Are you going to die? No.
Claudia, I am not going to die.
Why should I believe you? Bailey? What are you It's too late to call, right? Not Japan.
Oh.
Charlie.
He's probably asleep, don't you think? I just keep thinking What if he's Just lying there in bed staring at the ceiling and he's going over and over this thing in his mind and Feeling alone and scared? And I should call him, right? I should call him and say And say God, what do I say? Well How about, "I love you", and you're going to get through this.
" I already said that to him when he told me about this, but what does that do to make this better for him? How does that help him? And the truth is, what can I possibly say that's gonna make any difference to him? I mean, what do I know about any of this? Really? You've never felt like you were totally alone and afraid? You've never felt like you didn't have the strength to make it through the next hour, never mind the whole night? Gee, your recovery must have been a piece of cake compared to mine.
You got through the past 7 months, right? Yeah.
You do know how to help him, Bailey.
Are you ready? Am I ready? For your appointment.
Are you ready? Well, there's gas in the car, if that's what you mean.
No, Charlie, I'm not talking about gas.
Do you have our family history? Claud, don't worry about it.
Look, Charlie, I know you don't think I can handle this, but I can, ok? I'm not just some little baby anymore.
Now, do you have our medical history, both for you and mom and dad? I'll make sure I have it, claud.
Good, 'cause I've read that they're gonna ask you all about that.
And they're gonna take a ton of blood.
And do all these tests, like an EKG and A rectal exam.
You read about that, too? Uh-huh.
I also read about how they do this scan to find out how far the disease is in your body Like, in one lymph node, in more than one lymph node.
Or in more than one lymph node, but in 2 different parts of the body, like one in the right and one in the left.
Or in both the lymph nodes and in the organs, uh, like the liver.
Thank you.
I think the more you know about what's gonna happen, the better it is.
Yeah.
Hey.
You don't have to do this.
I mean, thanks and everything, but What time's your test today? Um, 4:00.
But it's ok.
Kirsten's going, and Claudia kind of insisted, so you really don't have to.
I'm there, man.
Look, Bailey There's gonna be other tests, radiation, maybe chemo.
I mean, I could be in pretty bad shape, and I'll need I'm just saying that there's gonna be plenty of other opportunities down the road.
No.
There's just today.
That's how you gotta think about it, Charlie.
There's just today, and today is right now.
It's right now.
It's this second.
So whatever you have to do right now to get through it, you do it.
You worry about tomorrow tomorrow.
Just take one day at a time.
Come on, Bailey.
Hey, it works.
The big picture, the future? That is huge, man, and, god, it's so scary.
Believe me, I know.
You know? Yeah.
Yeah.
And today Today's just 24 hours.
And if you're lucky, you're unconscious for 8 of them, and a good football game takes up 3 of them.
And if you give me a hand here That's an hour easy.
Now you're down to 10.
Whatever.
You get my point.
You just deal with what's right in front of you.
Ok.
Well I'll try that.
Thanks.
And hey.
You know what else really helps is keeping busy, not sitting around thinking all the time.
You gotta get out and do stuff and You know, get out of your head.
And what do you recommend? Well, for starters, you got 5 years' worth of crud on that windshield.
Hey.
It works, man.
Claudia? What are you doing here? I need to talk to you.
I think you should move back home, Julia.
I really do.
Great.
Another country heard from.
So so Charlie told you.
Yeah, of course he told me.
He told me as soon as he found out.
That's great.
That's just great.
Wait a second.
You're pissed? You don't think I have a right to know? No No, it's not that.
It's just I didn't want you to worry.
This whole thing is so I know, scary.
That's why I think it'd be easier if If you went back home.
Claud, Griffin and I don't want to, anything we can do to avoid that.
I told Charlie.
And he probably said that he didn't need you to, right? Right? See, that's how he's dealing with this whole thing, Julia, like it's no big deal.
But I read about it, jule, and it's gonna get worse.
I mean, he could be in really bad shape in another few weeks, depending on what kind of treatments the doctor prescribes.
What? Oh.
Oh, so he downplayed it to you, too.
Yeah, I mean, if they say that he needs chemo, he's not gonna be able to Chemo? Chemotherapy? That's only if it's hodgkin's stage 2b, and we won't know that until after the test.
But you know what? Even if that's not the way they say he has to go, even radiation's gonna wipe him out.
It could get really bad, and I think that if you were there, it'd just It'd really help.
What happened to all your furniture? Now I need you to drink it all down, the whole pitcher.
It's about 2 glasses, ok? It's orange-flavored, like tang, you know? Great.
Trust me, you're not gonna like it.
It's real sweet.
It makes most people sick to their stomach, particularly if you're already nauseated.
Are you, uh Yeah.
I'm feeling Right.
Well I want you to finish it for me, ok? It's a contrast fluid.
It'll help us see what we need to see in your test.
You got it.
That's that's enough.
Oh, my god.
Oh, my god.
Charlie, are you Man, that's Don't.
Don't do that.
Don't look at the pitcher.
Just take it one thing at a time, Charlie.
One glass at a time.
All right, Bailey.
Ohh You did it.
Way to go, man.
Just got one more.
Claudia.
What? I'm upset for him.
I'm allowed to be upset for him.
This is not helping, claud.
For god's sake, claud, you want somebody to take you home? No.
Please let me stay, Charlie.
II want to be here with you.
Hey.
Where the hell's Julia, anyway? Didn't she know what time the test was? She's not coming.
I haven't told her yet.
What? She's got enough of her own stuff going on.
Here you go.
I told her.
What? I didn't know it was a secret.
God, Claudia! You can't yell at me for this.
I don't believe this.
Charlie, just forget it.
What difference does it make? So she knows that I'm sick? Does she know about the test today, too? I told her I was coming with you.
Man! Nice of her to show up.
Charlie, this is so not important right now.
She's right.
Just focus on what you gotta focus on.
Would you stop with the aa stuff for just one minute, bay? Kirsten: He's only trying to help.
Yeah, well, I could use a little less help from everybody.
I've got I've got one more glass to go.
Ok.
Charlie? Sarah.
Are you ok? Yeah.
I just I don't know.
Who are you looking for? 'Cause Julia and Bailey aren't No.
No, I know.
Um Actually, um I was looking for you.
I made this for you.
It's, um Well, it's stupid.
It's banana bread.
Thanks.
Look, I know this whole thing really isn't my business, but I want you to know that I care about you.
And I'm really sorry.
And if there's anything that I can do, please, tell me.
So can I get some more banana bread? Sure.
He's exactly the right age to get it.
That's what the book says.
Yeah? Mm-hmm.
The statistics you know, the They're not that bad.
So I guess if you have Cancer, it's a pretty good cancer to have Hodgkin's.
Hodgkin's.
Why didn't he tell me? Griffin? I mean, that's gotta mean something, doesn't it? I don't know.
Why don't you call him? I mean, god, he He told Claudia.
And now he probably knows that I know, and he still isn't calling.
I don't know what to tell you, jule.
And you know what the most ironic thing is? I am so Angry at him right now.
But I think we need to move back there.
What? Well, what else can we do? I mean, we need to get out of here, and and we don't have the money to get a new place.
And he offered.
And And now he's sick.
That's just So not what we planned.
I'm sorry.
Am I interrupting? What? What are you doing? Filling out insurance claims for all the tests we did yesterday.
Well, that's pretty annoying, huh? Yeah.
How's your hip? Better.
Good.
Good.
That bone marrow test is pretty horrible, huh? Uh, what time do you have to go back to, uh To get your results? Tomorrow morning.
I did a little reading on the whole radiation thing And how they make these casts of different parts of your body to make these shields to protect it during the radiation.
Oh.
You want to hear about it? No, Claudia, I don't.
Ok.
Ok.
How how did you sleep last night? I mean, did you have any of those night sweats or Claudia, what are you doing? I'm just trying to help.
Well, you're not, ok? You're making it worse.
All your picking and your questioning is just making it worse.
Charlie All you want to do is talk about my tests and my treatments and my symptoms.
It makes me feel better to talk about it.
Well, it make me feel worse! It just it just reminds me that I'm sick, Claudia! Your Million stupid little medical facts.
I'm sorry.
I don't need you to tell me that I have cancer.
All right? I know that.
I just need you to I don't know what I need you to do.
I need you to stop! Just get outta my face all the time.
I promise you, if something happens, I'll let you know.
But until then, just So I've I've just gotta I'm driving to the post office, and I just had to I just gotta know.
What are you waiting for, Julia, my funeral? What? I can't get Claudia to shut up about it, and you I don't hear a word from! Nothing! You don't even stop by! It's like I'm going through all this, and you couldn't care less! You think that? You think I don't care? What am I supposed to think?! What's it take, Julia? How much effort is required to pick up a freakin' phone?! Maybe it takes, I don't know, some sign, something, that I'm a part of your life! I mean, you want me to care, Charlie, but you didn't want me to know! But You do know! Now you know! But you didn't tell me! Claudia did! Look, I don't have time to play games with you, Julia! Games? You are the one playing games, Charlie.
You've let me go on and on about my stupid money problems.
You don't interrupt.
You don't say a word, like your health Like your cancer isn't important enough to mention.
Like, how could Julia possibly care about anything but herself? God, what am I supposed to do, Charlie, except take my cue from you? If you had wanted anything from me, if you had expected anything from me, you would've treated me like you thought I was capable of coming through for you.
But obviously, you don't.
So congratulations, Charlie.
I guess you had me pegged.
What is this? What is your God.
I'm I'm sick.
I'm sick, and you've got a problem with with my process?! Get over yourself, Julia! Man, I thought Owen was the baby of the family! Charlie.
Hey, man, I was worried.
Where you been? Out Dealing with Julia.
Just Don't get me started.
What? What's goin' on? Somehow Julia seems to think that she's the most important person in all this.
Like I'm sick, yeah, but the real issue is how she's treated.
You gotta be kidding me.
That's she's not that selfish.
You want to bet? "Why why was I the last to know?" How come you didn't tell me?" That is ridiculous.
No kidding.
You talk to her.
At least you get it.
Yeah, I will.
Hey.
Listen.
The reason I came by is my sponsor gave me this.
And Most of it has nothing to do with you, but there's this one chapter in here where the guy talks about, uh, the higher power stuff? You know, surrendering yourself The idea that there's somebody looking out for you.
And it is really helpful, man.
'Cause I was watching you yesterday and how hard all that stuff is? And I i kept thinking how all of this stuff really does apply.
You know? It doesn't matter what disease you have.
Bailey Ok.
I'm sorry.
Look, I can't explain it nearly as well as they do in here, so I don't want the book, Bailey.
Ok.
And I don't want to hear any more of your aa crap.
You got it? Yeah.
Ok, Charlie.
It's, like For god's sake, if you want to do something nice, just say you don't know what to say Like Sarah did.
Just bring me a banana bread, and then just shut the hell up! Ok.
Look I didn't mean to Upset you.
I i thought that this might help.
Really? Why is that? Because you understand? Because you know what I'm going through? No.
I didn't I have a disease, Bailey! You don't have a disease! You've got a problem! It's not the same thing! You can stop drinking if you want to.
I can't stop having cancer! So if it makes you feel better to talk with all your alcoholic friends about what it feels like to have a disease, then go right ahead! But leave me out of it, all right?! I'm tellin' you, man, you don't have a clue! Charlie, I came as soon as I got your What happened? They just they just don't get it.
None of them.
All they're doing is making it worse.
I mean, you saw Claudia, right? She she won't let up.
And Julia, check this out, she's mad at me.
And Bailey.
If I have to listen to any more of his a.
A.
Crap.
I mean, he's trying to bond with me over our diseases.
Incredible, huh? I'm sure he's just trying to make sense out of this whole thing any way he can.
Yeah, well, it's not helping.
None of them are helping.
You're the only one, Kirsten.
You're the only one I can talk to about this.
Oh, don't say that.
No, I mean it.
You are.
I don't want to be the only one, Charlie.
'Cause what happens one day when I say the wrong thing or or if I disappoint you in some way? Come on, you won't.
Yes, I will, Charlie.
And I'm scared because if I'm the only one, then I've got to watch everything that I say and everything that I do.
I'm going to have to get everything exactly right.
What are you talking about? You you're great, Kirsten.
You're exactly what I need.
I mean, if it wasn't for you, i Charlie, I hear what you're saying about them.
And it's like I'm next in line to make the same kinds of mistakes that they're making.
I'm gonna I'm gonna call you too much or I'm not going to call you enough.
Or you're going to get insulted by some analogy that I make to some experience that I've had and that's going to be it.
That is not going to happen.
Would you just listen to me, Charlie, please? I am telling you it is going to happen.
What do you want from me? I mean, I can't I can't worry about you worrying about me, ok? I mean, I'm sick, Kirsten.
I got to worry about that.
Anything else is too much.
I can't i can't take that on.
I think you have to.
Because you know what, Charlie? If you don't, then sooner or later, you are going to be going through this all alone.
Hey.
Rain.
Probably be getting a lot of leaky roof calls.
That's sort of the last thing you need right now, huh? Don't worry about it.
I'll deal with it.
So, do you need a lift over to the house this morning or is Annie gonna? Why? Did you have some more baked goods you wanted to bring by? What? I mean, what were you thinking, Sarah? Banana bread? It was a gesture.
Yeah, well, it was stupid.
Charlie said that? Maybe it made you feel good.
Like you got credit for being conscientious or something, but he's got cancer, Sarah.
So he doesn't need to be burdened with you imposing your, like, you're personal agenda on his situation.
My agenda to deliver banana bread? And if it was your intention to show me up, to make it look like I was over the top or something, in comparison to your stupid little banana bread, that's too much? Well, hey, mission accomplished.
Ok.
What else? What else? Yeah.
What else do you want to yell at me about? 'Cause if this helps you, you know, to be angry and scream about how unfair all this is, how helpless you feel.
How helpless you are.
Well, then, that's what you need to do.
So, go ahead, I can take it.
It's bad.
Not as bad as we feared, but not as good as we hoped.
Oh.
Mr.
salinger.
Charlie.
Would you like to include a family member in this discussion? You sure? It can really help to have someone else here.
So it it spread.
The cancer.
It's in a number of lymph nodes, yes, but all of them above the diaphragm, which is good news.
We call this hodgkin's stage 2A.
And we treat it with a Now, is Dr.
devlin the radiologist you've chosen? I guess.
My office will help coordinate the initial consultation, but I suggest you simultaneously set up a regular time for treatments.
Would you like to know the recovery statistics? Some people are comforted by the numbers.
Others find them, well, counter productive.
I know the statistics.
I'm going to check with my nurse about setting up those sessions with devlin.
He books up fast.
Why don't I ask whoever came with you to step in? This could be a lot to take in at once.
No, it's, um, I'm I'm here alone, but it's ok.
Well, it's a roof over our head.
That's about it.
Well, we could put a mattress in the loft.
There's no bathroom.
Well, if we need to go, we can just run into the house.
Look I think maybe the attic would work better.
No, I don't want Griffin, this way, it's kind of like us living with my family, but at the same time, having our own place.
Look, I just i don't want to live with my new husband in my old bedroom.
Ok? Yeah, maybe with a new coat of paint.
You know there'll be times when I need to stay over there.
You know, in the house.
For Owen and claud and And for him.
When he's really sick.
When he needs my help.
Well, I'll bring my pillow.
Hey, when did you About 10 minutes ago.
Claudia's been filling me in on everything.
I think it's really cool what you're doing, jule.
And if you need me to come home for awhile and help out with anything, I can.
No, that's No, I'm fine.
We're fine.
So where is he? He, uh, he went to get the results of his tests and everything.
With Kirsten? No.
I think he kind of blew her off, too.
God! So everyone's mad at him, huh? No kidding.
Man, what is his problem? He's sick.
And he's scared, and he's angry, and he has no idea how to handle any of it.
Does this mean we have to put up with all his crap? Well, he put up with ours, didn't he? Ok, then, so we take it.
Whatever he says, whatever he does, no matter how bad it gets, we take it.
Right.
And if it gets really bad, then we complain to each other.
But we don't ever complain to him.
Deal? Mm-hmm.
Deal.
Ok.
Charlie.
Didn't hear you come in.
What are you all doing here? Talking about me? No, we were just We're just hanging out.
So, you ok? You want to tell us what happened? Or, I mean, if you need some time alone, we can just Do you want us to go? No, don't.
I want I have a lot of new things to deal with.
All at once and it's It's, like, too much to get right all at once.
And, uh, I think I got it wrong the first time.
So, I'm saying I'm sorry.
And I wanna start over with all of you.
Just tell you everything that I know.
What's going to happen to me.
And, um, and what I need.
Just from the beginning.
I have cancer.
Um, hodgkin's disease, stage 2, actually, which I just found out.
And, uh
Thought you might need a lift.
No, that's ok.
Well, sometimes Reed gives me a ride on his way over to Griffin's, so Why don't I catch you later at home? Are you serious? Get in the car, claud.
Come on, Charlie.
Get in the car.
Look, um, as long as we're alone, I wanted to talk to you about something, something that's been going on with me.
I haven't told the others yet.
I wanted to tell you first.
I'm kinda, um It turns out I've got this this thing, this disease thing.
What, like v.
D.
Or something? Charlie.
No, it's not It's nothing like that.
It's called hodgkin's.
Hodgkin's, I don't It's a disease of the lymphatic system, and sometimes it turns up in guys about my age.
That's why I've been feeling so, you know, kinda draggy and run down for the past few weeks.
I thought that was no big deal.
I know.
Me, too, but I went to see the doctor, and she diagnosed it right away, which is great because if it's caught early, which mine definitely was, then this thing's, like, 100% curable.
It's, like, 100% curable or it is 100% curable? I'm going to be fine, Claudia.
Ok? I'm going to have to have some treatments and stuff, which just means going into the doctor's office every day for, like, 5 minutes.
For what, medicine? Yeah.
Pretty much.
They just want to make sure that you're getting the right dosage.
It takes 6 weeks, and then it's over.
I'm totally back to normal.
You know what the doctor told me? She said that if you have to have a disease, hodgkin's is definitely one of the best ones to have.
That's pretty reassuring, huh? Ok.
How does ice cream sound? Everybody wants to live like they wanna live and everybody wants to love Like they wanna love everybody wants to be closer to free-ee-ee-ee closer to free Hey.
Hey, man.
I got your message.
I was just on my way in when it occurred to me.
Do you have a plane? Yeah, somewhere.
'Cause we just put some carpeting down in Annie's bedroom 'cause Annie's bedroom is directly above Sarah's bedroom, and, well, you get the picture.
Anyway, it's this cheapo shag, so now we can't close any of the doors.
Hello.
Here we go.
Charlie? Hey, man, it's cool with you if I borrow this? Cool.
Thank you.
So, what was up with that message you left? What did you need to talk about? Is everything ok? Is Owen No, it's not Owen.
Uh, I just i just wanted you to know about something that's going on with me, that's all.
You ok? Um You might you might want to sit down.
Ok, I'm sitting.
What what's going on? Ok.
Boy, I'm telling you.
You can't beat renting, huh? Live like a king.
Am I right? At least for a little while.
Dining room set, kitchen set, and the bedroom set.
All right, you guys, let's go.
Let's get busy.
God.
We'll find something else, ok, jule? As soon as I get my shop turned around.
Griffin Stop, ok? You don't have to promise me anything.
I'm sorry.
Forget it, ok? It's not it's not Nina's fault.
It was just It was bad timing.
Anyway, I have more important things to worry about.
I know.
I know you do.
I have my first appointment tomorrow with the oncologist.
What are they What is that? I don't know exactly.
All kinds of tests Some scan thing that tells them where it is in your body, which lymph nodes, you know? I guess that pretty much determines how bad it is, what kind of treatments you're going to need.
God, Charlie.
I know.
But this isn't actually happening to me.
So that's the reason I'm so calm.
Can i Can I come with you? Tomorrow to the appointment? Kirsten, you don't have to 'cause I feel really bad, Charlie.
I feel like I keep leaving you at all the most important times.
But I promise you, in 2 weeks, all this is going to be over, and I'm going to be here for anything that you need.
Ok.
'Cause you don't have to do this alone.
I'm not.
I'm not.
I haven't told Julia yet, but I told Bailey and Claudia.
They were both great.
Of course they were.
What did you expect? I don't know.
I guess I thought maybe they'd panic, freak out or something, I don't know.
I mean, Claudia's only 14.
She's old enough.
Yeah, she is.
Excuse me.
I think these pamphlets you gave me are kind of out of date.
I'm sorry? Well, the statistics on survival rates are kind of off.
So I just don't think they have the most recent scientific advances.
I need your absolute latest information.
This is the latest information.
About hodgkin's disease.
Yes.
Is there something you're looking for that you're not finding? No.
That's ok.
Charlie? Hi, jule.
You got here fast, huh? What? Well, I left you a message.
Oh, I, uh, I didn't get it.
That's ok.
I just, uh, just said I needed to talk to you, and you're here, so Well, I need to talk to you, too.
Ok.
So we're both Charlie, can I borrow some kitchen stuff? Kitchen stuff? Yeah, you know, just a pot and some silverware and stuff.
Everything that we had was rented, and we had to return it.
So I'm sorry.
I'm not Griffin lost most of his money.
The business was really bad, and so he had to borrow to keep it going.
And we have to give up the apartment, and we've returned our furniture, and we're living in this empty space, and it's actually kind of horrible.
Look, take whatever you need.
Why don't you come live at home? Having you at home right now would be God! No, that that is the last thing we want.
I mean, the whole point to this is that we do this on our own.
I know.
I know that.
I mean, all I'm saying is that everyone needs a little help every once in a while, and if it makes it easier for you guys, I can really use Stop it.
Charlie, ok? I'm not coming home.
Griffin and I will work this out ourselves like any married couple.
I just i told you because you've been really great, and you have a right to know.
Thanks for the stuff.
You're welcome.
Oh, um, you had something you wanted to talk about? Nah, you got enough on your mind right now.
Ok.
That is so Bailey, I don't know what to say.
Yeah, well I mean, he seems so Even last week at the wedding, he seemed so I know.
Cancer? Yeah, cancer.
Do you think he's going to be ok? I mean, Bailey, he's got to be ok.
I don't know.
What can I do? Nothing.
He's not it's not like you guys are close or anything.
Well, yeah, but I want to do something to help if he needs something.
Well, then, he's got Claudia, Julia, or me to get it for him.
Look, Sarah, this is a family thing, ok? And we're good at this kind of stuff.
He's got us.
So thanks anyway.
Charlie.
Charlie.
Shh.
I finally got Owen to go down.
I went to the medical center today.
I looked it up.
Looked up what? It's not just a disease.
Hodgkin's It's cancer.
Claudia Isn't it?! Would you keep your voice down? It's a kind of cancer, Claudia, yes, but Only you didn't want me to know that, did you? I didn't think you needed to hear that word.
What about the words "radiation" and "chemotherapy," huh? 'Cause those are the treatments that you were talking about, isn't it? I didn't want to scare you.
So, in other words It's bad.
Yeah, I mean, it must be bad, or you would've leveled with me.
You said it's cancer, and one in 4 people who get it die from it.
But you didn't.
You said it's 100% curable.
And then You bought me an ice cream.
Claudia, come on.
Are you going to die? No.
Claudia, I am not going to die.
Why should I believe you? Bailey? What are you It's too late to call, right? Not Japan.
Oh.
Charlie.
He's probably asleep, don't you think? I just keep thinking What if he's Just lying there in bed staring at the ceiling and he's going over and over this thing in his mind and Feeling alone and scared? And I should call him, right? I should call him and say And say God, what do I say? Well How about, "I love you", and you're going to get through this.
" I already said that to him when he told me about this, but what does that do to make this better for him? How does that help him? And the truth is, what can I possibly say that's gonna make any difference to him? I mean, what do I know about any of this? Really? You've never felt like you were totally alone and afraid? You've never felt like you didn't have the strength to make it through the next hour, never mind the whole night? Gee, your recovery must have been a piece of cake compared to mine.
You got through the past 7 months, right? Yeah.
You do know how to help him, Bailey.
Are you ready? Am I ready? For your appointment.
Are you ready? Well, there's gas in the car, if that's what you mean.
No, Charlie, I'm not talking about gas.
Do you have our family history? Claud, don't worry about it.
Look, Charlie, I know you don't think I can handle this, but I can, ok? I'm not just some little baby anymore.
Now, do you have our medical history, both for you and mom and dad? I'll make sure I have it, claud.
Good, 'cause I've read that they're gonna ask you all about that.
And they're gonna take a ton of blood.
And do all these tests, like an EKG and A rectal exam.
You read about that, too? Uh-huh.
I also read about how they do this scan to find out how far the disease is in your body Like, in one lymph node, in more than one lymph node.
Or in more than one lymph node, but in 2 different parts of the body, like one in the right and one in the left.
Or in both the lymph nodes and in the organs, uh, like the liver.
Thank you.
I think the more you know about what's gonna happen, the better it is.
Yeah.
Hey.
You don't have to do this.
I mean, thanks and everything, but What time's your test today? Um, 4:00.
But it's ok.
Kirsten's going, and Claudia kind of insisted, so you really don't have to.
I'm there, man.
Look, Bailey There's gonna be other tests, radiation, maybe chemo.
I mean, I could be in pretty bad shape, and I'll need I'm just saying that there's gonna be plenty of other opportunities down the road.
No.
There's just today.
That's how you gotta think about it, Charlie.
There's just today, and today is right now.
It's right now.
It's this second.
So whatever you have to do right now to get through it, you do it.
You worry about tomorrow tomorrow.
Just take one day at a time.
Come on, Bailey.
Hey, it works.
The big picture, the future? That is huge, man, and, god, it's so scary.
Believe me, I know.
You know? Yeah.
Yeah.
And today Today's just 24 hours.
And if you're lucky, you're unconscious for 8 of them, and a good football game takes up 3 of them.
And if you give me a hand here That's an hour easy.
Now you're down to 10.
Whatever.
You get my point.
You just deal with what's right in front of you.
Ok.
Well I'll try that.
Thanks.
And hey.
You know what else really helps is keeping busy, not sitting around thinking all the time.
You gotta get out and do stuff and You know, get out of your head.
And what do you recommend? Well, for starters, you got 5 years' worth of crud on that windshield.
Hey.
It works, man.
Claudia? What are you doing here? I need to talk to you.
I think you should move back home, Julia.
I really do.
Great.
Another country heard from.
So so Charlie told you.
Yeah, of course he told me.
He told me as soon as he found out.
That's great.
That's just great.
Wait a second.
You're pissed? You don't think I have a right to know? No No, it's not that.
It's just I didn't want you to worry.
This whole thing is so I know, scary.
That's why I think it'd be easier if If you went back home.
Claud, Griffin and I don't want to, anything we can do to avoid that.
I told Charlie.
And he probably said that he didn't need you to, right? Right? See, that's how he's dealing with this whole thing, Julia, like it's no big deal.
But I read about it, jule, and it's gonna get worse.
I mean, he could be in really bad shape in another few weeks, depending on what kind of treatments the doctor prescribes.
What? Oh.
Oh, so he downplayed it to you, too.
Yeah, I mean, if they say that he needs chemo, he's not gonna be able to Chemo? Chemotherapy? That's only if it's hodgkin's stage 2b, and we won't know that until after the test.
But you know what? Even if that's not the way they say he has to go, even radiation's gonna wipe him out.
It could get really bad, and I think that if you were there, it'd just It'd really help.
What happened to all your furniture? Now I need you to drink it all down, the whole pitcher.
It's about 2 glasses, ok? It's orange-flavored, like tang, you know? Great.
Trust me, you're not gonna like it.
It's real sweet.
It makes most people sick to their stomach, particularly if you're already nauseated.
Are you, uh Yeah.
I'm feeling Right.
Well I want you to finish it for me, ok? It's a contrast fluid.
It'll help us see what we need to see in your test.
You got it.
That's that's enough.
Oh, my god.
Oh, my god.
Charlie, are you Man, that's Don't.
Don't do that.
Don't look at the pitcher.
Just take it one thing at a time, Charlie.
One glass at a time.
All right, Bailey.
Ohh You did it.
Way to go, man.
Just got one more.
Claudia.
What? I'm upset for him.
I'm allowed to be upset for him.
This is not helping, claud.
For god's sake, claud, you want somebody to take you home? No.
Please let me stay, Charlie.
II want to be here with you.
Hey.
Where the hell's Julia, anyway? Didn't she know what time the test was? She's not coming.
I haven't told her yet.
What? She's got enough of her own stuff going on.
Here you go.
I told her.
What? I didn't know it was a secret.
God, Claudia! You can't yell at me for this.
I don't believe this.
Charlie, just forget it.
What difference does it make? So she knows that I'm sick? Does she know about the test today, too? I told her I was coming with you.
Man! Nice of her to show up.
Charlie, this is so not important right now.
She's right.
Just focus on what you gotta focus on.
Would you stop with the aa stuff for just one minute, bay? Kirsten: He's only trying to help.
Yeah, well, I could use a little less help from everybody.
I've got I've got one more glass to go.
Ok.
Charlie? Sarah.
Are you ok? Yeah.
I just I don't know.
Who are you looking for? 'Cause Julia and Bailey aren't No.
No, I know.
Um Actually, um I was looking for you.
I made this for you.
It's, um Well, it's stupid.
It's banana bread.
Thanks.
Look, I know this whole thing really isn't my business, but I want you to know that I care about you.
And I'm really sorry.
And if there's anything that I can do, please, tell me.
So can I get some more banana bread? Sure.
He's exactly the right age to get it.
That's what the book says.
Yeah? Mm-hmm.
The statistics you know, the They're not that bad.
So I guess if you have Cancer, it's a pretty good cancer to have Hodgkin's.
Hodgkin's.
Why didn't he tell me? Griffin? I mean, that's gotta mean something, doesn't it? I don't know.
Why don't you call him? I mean, god, he He told Claudia.
And now he probably knows that I know, and he still isn't calling.
I don't know what to tell you, jule.
And you know what the most ironic thing is? I am so Angry at him right now.
But I think we need to move back there.
What? Well, what else can we do? I mean, we need to get out of here, and and we don't have the money to get a new place.
And he offered.
And And now he's sick.
That's just So not what we planned.
I'm sorry.
Am I interrupting? What? What are you doing? Filling out insurance claims for all the tests we did yesterday.
Well, that's pretty annoying, huh? Yeah.
How's your hip? Better.
Good.
Good.
That bone marrow test is pretty horrible, huh? Uh, what time do you have to go back to, uh To get your results? Tomorrow morning.
I did a little reading on the whole radiation thing And how they make these casts of different parts of your body to make these shields to protect it during the radiation.
Oh.
You want to hear about it? No, Claudia, I don't.
Ok.
Ok.
How how did you sleep last night? I mean, did you have any of those night sweats or Claudia, what are you doing? I'm just trying to help.
Well, you're not, ok? You're making it worse.
All your picking and your questioning is just making it worse.
Charlie All you want to do is talk about my tests and my treatments and my symptoms.
It makes me feel better to talk about it.
Well, it make me feel worse! It just it just reminds me that I'm sick, Claudia! Your Million stupid little medical facts.
I'm sorry.
I don't need you to tell me that I have cancer.
All right? I know that.
I just need you to I don't know what I need you to do.
I need you to stop! Just get outta my face all the time.
I promise you, if something happens, I'll let you know.
But until then, just So I've I've just gotta I'm driving to the post office, and I just had to I just gotta know.
What are you waiting for, Julia, my funeral? What? I can't get Claudia to shut up about it, and you I don't hear a word from! Nothing! You don't even stop by! It's like I'm going through all this, and you couldn't care less! You think that? You think I don't care? What am I supposed to think?! What's it take, Julia? How much effort is required to pick up a freakin' phone?! Maybe it takes, I don't know, some sign, something, that I'm a part of your life! I mean, you want me to care, Charlie, but you didn't want me to know! But You do know! Now you know! But you didn't tell me! Claudia did! Look, I don't have time to play games with you, Julia! Games? You are the one playing games, Charlie.
You've let me go on and on about my stupid money problems.
You don't interrupt.
You don't say a word, like your health Like your cancer isn't important enough to mention.
Like, how could Julia possibly care about anything but herself? God, what am I supposed to do, Charlie, except take my cue from you? If you had wanted anything from me, if you had expected anything from me, you would've treated me like you thought I was capable of coming through for you.
But obviously, you don't.
So congratulations, Charlie.
I guess you had me pegged.
What is this? What is your God.
I'm I'm sick.
I'm sick, and you've got a problem with with my process?! Get over yourself, Julia! Man, I thought Owen was the baby of the family! Charlie.
Hey, man, I was worried.
Where you been? Out Dealing with Julia.
Just Don't get me started.
What? What's goin' on? Somehow Julia seems to think that she's the most important person in all this.
Like I'm sick, yeah, but the real issue is how she's treated.
You gotta be kidding me.
That's she's not that selfish.
You want to bet? "Why why was I the last to know?" How come you didn't tell me?" That is ridiculous.
No kidding.
You talk to her.
At least you get it.
Yeah, I will.
Hey.
Listen.
The reason I came by is my sponsor gave me this.
And Most of it has nothing to do with you, but there's this one chapter in here where the guy talks about, uh, the higher power stuff? You know, surrendering yourself The idea that there's somebody looking out for you.
And it is really helpful, man.
'Cause I was watching you yesterday and how hard all that stuff is? And I i kept thinking how all of this stuff really does apply.
You know? It doesn't matter what disease you have.
Bailey Ok.
I'm sorry.
Look, I can't explain it nearly as well as they do in here, so I don't want the book, Bailey.
Ok.
And I don't want to hear any more of your aa crap.
You got it? Yeah.
Ok, Charlie.
It's, like For god's sake, if you want to do something nice, just say you don't know what to say Like Sarah did.
Just bring me a banana bread, and then just shut the hell up! Ok.
Look I didn't mean to Upset you.
I i thought that this might help.
Really? Why is that? Because you understand? Because you know what I'm going through? No.
I didn't I have a disease, Bailey! You don't have a disease! You've got a problem! It's not the same thing! You can stop drinking if you want to.
I can't stop having cancer! So if it makes you feel better to talk with all your alcoholic friends about what it feels like to have a disease, then go right ahead! But leave me out of it, all right?! I'm tellin' you, man, you don't have a clue! Charlie, I came as soon as I got your What happened? They just they just don't get it.
None of them.
All they're doing is making it worse.
I mean, you saw Claudia, right? She she won't let up.
And Julia, check this out, she's mad at me.
And Bailey.
If I have to listen to any more of his a.
A.
Crap.
I mean, he's trying to bond with me over our diseases.
Incredible, huh? I'm sure he's just trying to make sense out of this whole thing any way he can.
Yeah, well, it's not helping.
None of them are helping.
You're the only one, Kirsten.
You're the only one I can talk to about this.
Oh, don't say that.
No, I mean it.
You are.
I don't want to be the only one, Charlie.
'Cause what happens one day when I say the wrong thing or or if I disappoint you in some way? Come on, you won't.
Yes, I will, Charlie.
And I'm scared because if I'm the only one, then I've got to watch everything that I say and everything that I do.
I'm going to have to get everything exactly right.
What are you talking about? You you're great, Kirsten.
You're exactly what I need.
I mean, if it wasn't for you, i Charlie, I hear what you're saying about them.
And it's like I'm next in line to make the same kinds of mistakes that they're making.
I'm gonna I'm gonna call you too much or I'm not going to call you enough.
Or you're going to get insulted by some analogy that I make to some experience that I've had and that's going to be it.
That is not going to happen.
Would you just listen to me, Charlie, please? I am telling you it is going to happen.
What do you want from me? I mean, I can't I can't worry about you worrying about me, ok? I mean, I'm sick, Kirsten.
I got to worry about that.
Anything else is too much.
I can't i can't take that on.
I think you have to.
Because you know what, Charlie? If you don't, then sooner or later, you are going to be going through this all alone.
Hey.
Rain.
Probably be getting a lot of leaky roof calls.
That's sort of the last thing you need right now, huh? Don't worry about it.
I'll deal with it.
So, do you need a lift over to the house this morning or is Annie gonna? Why? Did you have some more baked goods you wanted to bring by? What? I mean, what were you thinking, Sarah? Banana bread? It was a gesture.
Yeah, well, it was stupid.
Charlie said that? Maybe it made you feel good.
Like you got credit for being conscientious or something, but he's got cancer, Sarah.
So he doesn't need to be burdened with you imposing your, like, you're personal agenda on his situation.
My agenda to deliver banana bread? And if it was your intention to show me up, to make it look like I was over the top or something, in comparison to your stupid little banana bread, that's too much? Well, hey, mission accomplished.
Ok.
What else? What else? Yeah.
What else do you want to yell at me about? 'Cause if this helps you, you know, to be angry and scream about how unfair all this is, how helpless you feel.
How helpless you are.
Well, then, that's what you need to do.
So, go ahead, I can take it.
It's bad.
Not as bad as we feared, but not as good as we hoped.
Oh.
Mr.
salinger.
Charlie.
Would you like to include a family member in this discussion? You sure? It can really help to have someone else here.
So it it spread.
The cancer.
It's in a number of lymph nodes, yes, but all of them above the diaphragm, which is good news.
We call this hodgkin's stage 2A.
And we treat it with a Now, is Dr.
devlin the radiologist you've chosen? I guess.
My office will help coordinate the initial consultation, but I suggest you simultaneously set up a regular time for treatments.
Would you like to know the recovery statistics? Some people are comforted by the numbers.
Others find them, well, counter productive.
I know the statistics.
I'm going to check with my nurse about setting up those sessions with devlin.
He books up fast.
Why don't I ask whoever came with you to step in? This could be a lot to take in at once.
No, it's, um, I'm I'm here alone, but it's ok.
Well, it's a roof over our head.
That's about it.
Well, we could put a mattress in the loft.
There's no bathroom.
Well, if we need to go, we can just run into the house.
Look I think maybe the attic would work better.
No, I don't want Griffin, this way, it's kind of like us living with my family, but at the same time, having our own place.
Look, I just i don't want to live with my new husband in my old bedroom.
Ok? Yeah, maybe with a new coat of paint.
You know there'll be times when I need to stay over there.
You know, in the house.
For Owen and claud and And for him.
When he's really sick.
When he needs my help.
Well, I'll bring my pillow.
Hey, when did you About 10 minutes ago.
Claudia's been filling me in on everything.
I think it's really cool what you're doing, jule.
And if you need me to come home for awhile and help out with anything, I can.
No, that's No, I'm fine.
We're fine.
So where is he? He, uh, he went to get the results of his tests and everything.
With Kirsten? No.
I think he kind of blew her off, too.
God! So everyone's mad at him, huh? No kidding.
Man, what is his problem? He's sick.
And he's scared, and he's angry, and he has no idea how to handle any of it.
Does this mean we have to put up with all his crap? Well, he put up with ours, didn't he? Ok, then, so we take it.
Whatever he says, whatever he does, no matter how bad it gets, we take it.
Right.
And if it gets really bad, then we complain to each other.
But we don't ever complain to him.
Deal? Mm-hmm.
Deal.
Ok.
Charlie.
Didn't hear you come in.
What are you all doing here? Talking about me? No, we were just We're just hanging out.
So, you ok? You want to tell us what happened? Or, I mean, if you need some time alone, we can just Do you want us to go? No, don't.
I want I have a lot of new things to deal with.
All at once and it's It's, like, too much to get right all at once.
And, uh, I think I got it wrong the first time.
So, I'm saying I'm sorry.
And I wanna start over with all of you.
Just tell you everything that I know.
What's going to happen to me.
And, um, and what I need.
Just from the beginning.
I have cancer.
Um, hodgkin's disease, stage 2, actually, which I just found out.
And, uh