The Sandman (2022) s04e10 Episode Script

- I have not slept so well in ages.
- You're welcome.
How you doing, pumpkin, you
know, with the wedding coming up?
I'm fine.
Well, you're not fine, so don't pretend.
I'm not going to say "times a
great healer", because it isn't.
There's still a few dorks I'm
smarting over from the '90s.
I'm going to stop you there, I
know you've got the best intentions.
Both of you.
Yeah, it hurts.
And, yeah, it upset me and yes,
I do feel a little bit foolish.
But I'm moving on,
putting all that behind me.
Mum, I love you, but
shut up.
Right, I'm off to school.
That is not normal.
What happened?
Why am I with you?
Did we bond?
Is this a kidnapping?
Do you remember we were
talking about my wedding?
That I remember.
Well,
you had a point.
I did?
I was all for calling the
whole thing off last night,
I have every right to.
But that would have been selfish.
This is the rest of your
life, you're talking about.
This is my life.
Who I am.
You see these people,
Rose
she loves me.
My grandad was an important man here.
Right, he was loved and well respected.
I can't just throw all that away.
You see sometimes
you've just got to accept that
not everything is always
going to turn out the way
that you want them to.
You're right.
Come on, we're going to be late.
You are now officially
invited to my wedding.
Nice.
- Do I have to bring a present?
- Just yourself.
Right, let's get going. Things
to arrange, people to meet.
Obviously not assuming
I'm your best man.
But we have shared,
so pretty darn close.
I need to ask you a favour.
Whoa.
OK.
- Come on.
- What's going on?
This is for you, man.
Come on, man, what are
you doing? Let's go.
OK. Right.
So, this is all you, yeah?
I know it's a bit short notice but
if it weren't for the invite
I wouldn't have bothered.
Just go with the flow, bro.
I know we're not bessies but
we are bonding, aren't we?
Give me your hand.
Maharaja for a day.
You're the groom, OK.
Time to step up and be a man.
So what does this make
me rich then now, huh?
I mean it is Pakistani Rupees.
About 20 quid's worth
of Chunky Chicken, man.
I am going to need that back by the way.
All right, bro.
Hey, up, someone must
be getting married?
Saturday, no-one was supposed to know.
Ah, how is that working out for you?
Good one, sir. Good one.
That's what I'm here for.
You've got moves, man. Come on.
Sir. Will you come?
I know my grandad
would have invited you.
Yeah. I'd be honoured,
Johnny. Thank you.
- Don't let me down now.
- I'll be there.
There you go. There you go.
Are you all right?
Guess I'll have to be.
Are we?
That's up to you.
- I just want to be us again.
- We can.
But you've got to understand,
I'm different, Fizz.
I'm not always going to agree with you,
that doesn't mean I'm being disloyal.
- I never thought that.
- You did
and I can understand why you thought it.
It wasn't meant to hurt you.
- But you did.
- I know.
I know I'm a control freak,
but you're my best friend and
I don't want that to change.
I love you.
I love you too.
Oh, come here.
- It's all my fault.
- It wasn't.
Look, can we just go back
to sharing everything,
no matter how inappropriate, please?
- OK.
- OK.
- My thrush is back on the rampage.
- No.
- I want to talk to you
- What part of stay away did you not understand?
We've got nothing to say
to each other, all right?
The sooner you get that
in your head, the better.
- Please
- Look, I don't want to live with you any more!
Just give him time.
- It's my fault, I lied to him.
- You were protecting him,
there's a big difference.
- Hiya.
- Hi, sir.
Sir, do you mind if I don't
work with Kayla, today?
Oh, you're normally joined at the hip?
See, me, Kayla and Johnny Cooper,
kind of had a little bit of a tiff
and I wondered if you could kind of
help me break the ice between them.
So like if you could
partner her, with him?
Is this some kind of ruse?
No, no, sir, I promise, cross my heart
and swear to vote Brexit Party.
Yeah, yeah. All right.
Go on.
Good morning, Campers.
No?
Today, you'll be working in pairs.
Not your usual partners in crime.
This is not an opportunity for
you to discuss the football,
the cricket or whatever rubbish
your favourite social media zombie
is flogging you this week.
I want you to work
closely and diligently.
OK, eyes down for a full house.
Pawel and Rukhsana.
Saleem and Spud.
- Kayla and Johnny.
- No.
- Pardon?
- I mean,
lovely.
Go to work. Off you go.
Change positions.
Off the bums.
Bums are waiting.
It's rectum time, let's go.
Thank you.
Yeah, yeah.
Go on. Get a move on.
This is a very important
part of biology.
What goes on at that end of your
body is very important to understand
because a healthy gut is a happy gut.
And we all want to be happy.
I for one am not going to
feel awkward about this.
- Good.
- I mean. OK,
let's not pretend that nothing
has happened between us.
Hardly anything.
Unless the Wuthering
Heights wild and windy kiss
is raised in evidence, which
if it is, it won't be by me.
Or me.
We were good friends well
before you slept with Fizza.
And "the kiss", and the wedding,
neither me nor Fizza knew about.
Let's just acknowledge
those blips in our otherwise
unblipable relationship and
just move on down the track.
Do the project.
Which I'm sure will be very interesting
and informative for both of us.
How do bowel movements work?
Then again, maybe not.
Fizza, rectum and anal canal.
Saleem, haemorrhoids,
Kayla and Johnny, anal sphincters.
- You read my mind, sir.
- Lovely.
I thought you were moving on.
Or, haven't you?
Yeah, well.
I'm sort of stepping on the
train, but suddenly realising
I might have forgotten
something on the platform
and I'm casually tossing
my head over my shoulder,
to see if I've left anything unsaid.
The only thing you left is me.
And I completely understand you.
It makes me love you even more.
I never for one second
wanted to hurt anybody, right?
Especially you.
I hope you really believe that.
Because I'd hate for you
to think that it was a lie.
Thank you.
Don't thank me.
I don't want that.
The one that's thanked always
seems to be left behind.
- Kayla
- And no-one has been, have they?
God. This is hard.
I didn't think it would be this hard.
But it's for the best,
we'll see that.
- Will we?
- In the end.
Won't we? Say we will.
Yeah.
Yeah, we will.
"First of all
First of all, I wanna thanks, yeah, and,
I'm, uh, I'm sure, my new
I'm sure my new wife"
"Would like to me to
thank you on her behalf
for showing our two
families this great respect."
I ain't never gonna
get the hang of this.
You think calling Rose me Gypsy
princess would be over the top?
It's a Gypsy wedding.
The one time in your life you can be
as big and over the top as you like.
So, Rose is your Gypsy princess then,
the love of your life.
I'm supposed I'm gonna
have to build that part.
You've known Rose your whole life.
It should be easy if you need to say it.
Are you doin' this for you
or for Granddad?
The dead don't get to ask things of us.
Dead are dead.
"You've every right to ignore me.
I'm ashamed of the way I treat you.
I'm sorry, Kayla."
There, beautiful.
Thank you.
I
- I really don't get you most of the time.
- Yeah.
Tell me about it, Enoch.
But you're my sister, and I love you.
You may not get me yet, but I get you.
- Here, try this.
- OK.
My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding, here we come.
- We look amazing.
- Can you see everyone staring at us?
I know. It's 'cos we look so good. Gosh.
- Hiya.
- Afternoon.
- Hi.
- Hiya.
Must be an ethnic
cultural thing, you know?
Definitely.
Thought you were going to wear black?
I thought I'd surprise you.
I really need you to get through this.
Thank you for coming.
It's all right. SHE CHUCKLES
- She looks beautiful.
- Yeah.
I'll give her that.
Sure you're all right?
I feel sure that Johnny
and Rose would like me
to thank you for
joining them here today,
to celebrate the beginning
of their new life together,
as husband and wife.
May I ask you all to be seated, please?
You are all here today to
witness the joining in matrimony
of Johnny Danior Cooper and
Rose Florence Defiance Boswell.
If anybody here knows
of any lawful impediment,
why these two people should
not be joined in matrimony,
he or she should declare it
now, or forever hold their peace.
- Love
- She can't marry him.
She loves me.
Sit down, Liam.
Who's Liam?
Get him out of here.
Don't do it, Johnny.
Mate, you don't love her.
You told me.
Who the hell's he?
Is he telling the truth?
I'm sorry.
I thought I did, but
But I don't love you, Rose.
I don't think I ever have.
I've lied and I've
cheated on you for years.
She did with Liam as well, don't forget.
I'm sorry, Rose, but
I can't do it any more.
I love her.
The hairy one?
Is that it? All this time you've
been cheating on my daughter?
Maybe we should all just have a minute.
Come on, Kayla, pick up the pace.
Oi, you, hairy.
Get back here.
Come on.
This is as far as I go, OK?
- I want you to be happy.
- No.
And you are happy.
I'm happy for you.
Nothing matters more to me than that.
Come on.
Go.
Come on, love, hurry up.
- Go.
- Thank you.
Oh, my God, I was wondering
what you were about to say.
- I couldn't let him go ahead with it.
- Obviously.
I thought you were going to
declare your love as well.
That wouldn't have been right.
- I told you, I don't want to see you.
- Just shut up
and just listen to her.
Thank you. OK, OK.
I messed up.
I should have told you and I didn't.
And I should have
made your dad tell you.
- I had a right to know. You know, that's my family.
- I know
- So he just dumped me and ran off.
- No, no.
- He was hurting.
- So was I.
I just wanted me mam
and I didn't have her any more.
My dad said it was all my fault she died
'cos I hurt her, but I didn't.
They should be here,
you know, my dad
should be here, with me.
I just wanted to stand by
his side and pray for her.
Oh, your mother loved you so much.
She loved you very much
and she would understand.
People, they behave
different when someone die.
They see things differently, eh, na?
This was nobody's fault.
Nobody's.
I know you miss her.
I miss her, too.
So we remember her, we
will remember her together.
We are your family now.
OK?
Is this the moment I fall into
your arms and say "I love you?"
- I think I've earned it.
- You think?
You picked your moment.
Yeah.
Look, this is real now,
you know, this you and me.
I'd like
I'd like it not to be another lie,
you know, that I'm not second guessing.
I'd like to be able
to feel safe with you.
I want you to know,
that when I told
everybody that I loved you,
I've never felt more sure or
honest about something in my life.
I don't expect you to feel the same way.
I don't deserve it,
but right here, this second,
I've never been happier.
And if I'm never happy again
I'll always have this.
Now you've earned it.
Ready?
OK.
Bismillah.
This is for my mother.
Oh, Allah, You are her sustainer.
You are her creator.
You provided her with sustenance,
guided her to Islam, and
took her soul back to You.
You best know her
secrets and public life.
We plead to You on her behalf,
forgive her sins and give her peace.
- Amen.
- Amen.
Well done.
Good lad.
Right.
OK.
Make sure you
Saleem, you have to
have the green today.
You are never eating the
greens. Give him double.
- Where's Johnny?
- Oh, gone to face the music.
Gives it a whole new perspective
of Ackley Bridge, from up here.
You need that, sometimes.
As long as we always
get to see it together.
Woe betide anyone who tries to stop us.