Ghosts (2021) s04e11 Episode Script

1
SAMANTHA: Bela, we are so glad
that you were able to come visit.
I know it's not under
the happiest circumstances.
Well, it's never fun getting fired,
but hey, we had creative differences.
Right, at the cat café.
What's a cat café?
Can cats even drink coffee?
What the hell is going on out there?
Samantha, we need to speak with you.
It's Thor. Next week is the
anniversary of his abandonment,
and he has become quite irritable.
He's being a real bummer, man.
[ELECTRICITY CRACKLING]
[THORFINN WAILING]
Ghost thing?
Thor's shipmates left without
him a thousand years ago,
and every year, on the run-up
to the anniversary,
he starts acting out.
It's fine. Once it passes,
he'll return to a more
normal level of Viking anger.
It's not fine.
This morning, I waved at him,
and he chopped my hand off.
Was it the most physical
contact I've had in months?
Was it nice just to feel something?
Point is, I'm available
for setups, people.
[GROANS] Why so many steps?
Why you not build this house shorter?
Isaac, put out hand real quick.
Hetty is the one who built the house.
- [GASPS]
- Cut her hand off.
No one needs to have their hand cut off.
Thor, you can talk to me.
I understand what you're going through.
I was also abandoned.
You mean, the time when you were nine
and your mother left you
at a Target store
for an hour after you threw a fit?
Sure, she came back,
but it was still traumatic.
All I wanted was
the Lisa Frank Trapper Keeper
with the dolphin on it.
Mother leaving you alone
in store with toys and candy,
not same as shipmates
leaving Thor in strange land
alone to die.
I'm not saying it's the same.
It did kind of sound like
you were saying that.
- [ELECTRICITY CRACKLING]
- Your thing not same!
[LIGHT BULB POPS]
Okay. Thor?
I think it's time we go back to therapy.
How's the book coming, babe?
It's coming along. And
the ghosts are loving
the new dish you've been
working on for the menu.
Look at you two.
A published author and a
soon-to-be head chef? Okay.
They would be the power
couple in their friend group
- if they had any living friends.
- [PHONE CHIMES]
Seriously? That guy Sean
that I was gonna hire
to manage the restaurant?
He took another job.
Oh, I'm so sorry, Jay.
I don't have time to deal
with all this managerial crap.
I got a list of, like, a thousand things
that Sean was supposed to do.
I wish I could help, but
between the Viking therapy
and this vampire deadline
More like un-deadline.
Uh, hello? [LAUGHS]
This is, like, perfect timing.
I'm unemployed.
Put me in, coach.
Whoa. That's a really
generous offer, Bela.
I-I'm just not sure
that I can take advantage
of your kindness like that.
Jay is lying through his teeth.
He don't want his screwup sister
anywhere near his restaurant.
[PHONE VIBRATING]
Ugh, I should take
this, it's my landlord.
But I'm serious, Jay.
I would love to help you out.
I'm very responsible.
Hi, Stanley.
So, yeah, someone put a hairbrush
in my garbage disposal.
Well, I don't really want
to point fingers.
Jay, I know Bela doesn't
have the best track record
- She got fired from a cat café.
- Okay,
but she also worked in advertising,
and event planning, marketing.
Yeah, she's been fired
from some top companies.
Look, she's smart.
She just needs someone
to believe in her.
So, Jay, what do you say?
You gonna let me help you out?
My guy Jay's a softie.
I feel a cave coming on.
N
Okay. Thanks, Bela.
[CHUCKLES] Yeah!
I am not gonna let you down.
ALBERTA: I don't know about this.
That girl is a train wreck,
and I've witnessed
an actual train wreck.
Well, that was more
of a heist gone wrong.
But if you want to know who
was involved, I ain't talking.
PARK: So
what I can help you with, Samantha?
[SIGHS] Well, shipmates abandon me
a thousand years ago.
Translate.
Well, my mom left me at Target
when I was in third grade.
And now Thor filled with rage.
And now I'm filled with rage.
PARK: That's hard.
And what was her reasoning
for leaving you there?
Thor not know. Shipmates
tell everyone Thor wander off.
I hear from my baby Bjorn,
who is ghost now.
Well, she said that it was
because I wandered off.
THORFINN: But Thor not wander off!
Thor get back to ship
when Thor supposed to.
Only to see ship leave without Thor.
But I didn't wander off, I just, uh,
went to the little Target Pizza Hut
like I was supposed to,
but she wasn't there.
I'm sorry you had to go through that.
Doctor, is there something I can do
to relieve some of the pain I feel
around the anniversary of this incident?
Pain!
[ELECTRICITY CRACKLING]
We're having that looked at.
Well, it sounds like you need
to get the real answer
for why your mom left you.
How Thor do that? Shipmates long dead.
Unfortunately, my mom died
seven years ago.
You know, death
its own form of abandonment.
It's possible you're conflating
your childhood trauma
with the more recent trauma
of losing your mother.
That's Wow,
that's really interesting.
You know, now that I think about it
Shut up, Samantha.
Thor just have amazing idea.
You go to Norway,
talk to ghost of dead shipmates
and find real reason
for Thor's abandonment.
I'm sorry, uh, Samantha,
it seemed like you were having
sort of a breakthrough,
but then you just kind of trailed off.
Um
What you waiting for? Simple solution
just fall in lap: drop everything,
go to Norway immediately.
I can't just go to Norway.
I'm sorry?
It's just another issue that I have.
Fear of flying,
specifically to Scandinavia.
Interesting.
[EXPLOSION]
Jay, we lost engine one.
- [EXPLOSION]
- And there goes engine two.
There's the problem: we're out of gas.
Damn it, I told Bela to fill her up
before we took off.
Okay, I see what's happening here.
It's a classic stress dream.
You're worried Bela's gonna screw up
that punch list you gave her.
I don't know what I was thinking.
You know, I could have said no,
but instead, I trusted my business
to the most unreliable person
in the world,
and now I'm about to crash
into the North Atlantic.
I'm pretty sure you'll wake up first.
Wait a minute, you could
spy on Bela to make sure
she's not making any mistakes,
and then report back to me
tomorrow night.
You know, usually, I don't like
to get in the middle
of family drama, but that's
not true. I'd love to.
Appreciate it, Sass.
Oh, also, I'd brace for impact.
Can you maybe dream about something
a little less stressful tomorrow night?
I'll try. I love you, man.
Love you.
[BOTH SCREAMING]
THORFINN: Please, Samantha.
Just book ticket to Norway.
You're being very selfish.
I went to a Dead show in Norway once.
Or I thought I did.
It turns out, I was just on acid
and never left my bedroom.
Thor, I'm running a B and B,
I have a book deadline,
the restaurant is opening
What about Peter?
He's always annoying us
with tales of travel.
Maybe he could go in Sam's stead.
I'd love to help, but Thor's
village sounds very remote.
- So?
- Well, when traveling internationally,
I like to stick close to airports,
so that way, when Little Pete
starts to disappear,
I can make it home
before I vanish into oblivion.
Isn't "Little Pete" what
everyone calls your grandson?
I will work on a new nickname.
Thor very frustrated.
So close to fixing problems,
but no one willing to
cross ocean for him.
- [ELECTRICITY CRACKLING]
- Disappointed!
JAY: Oh, my God!
Sam?
I think Thorfinn fried my laptop,
and it had all my recipes on it.
THORFINN: You hear that, Pete?
Jay lose recipes all because
you not go to Norway.
FLOWER: Wow, that was
cult-leader-level manipulative,
and I'm not gonna lie, it's kind of hot.
All right, fine.
What good
is having this miraculous power,
- if I don't use it to help a friend?
- [SHOUTS]
And wherever I happen to be
when "the hammer" disappears,
I'll just do my best
to make it home in time.
- Hmm, don't love that one.
- I'll be honest, I'm intrigued.
Bjorn, I have news!
Pete is in sky ship right now,
on way to motherland!
Hopefully, he will learn reason
for Thor's abandonment!
I'm so jealous of Peter.
I miss the village.
This time of year is beautiful
in Soørlia.
Why you say Soørlia?
We are from Steinkjer!
Oh, right, you do not know.
Year after you not return,
Steinkjer run out of cod,
so whole village move to Soørlia.
But if village move away,
then no ghosts of shipmates
will be there!
Uh-oh.
Pete going to wrong village!
Being a spy isn't as exciting
as the movies make it out to be.
Yeah, they rarely show James Bond
watching a woman order table linens.
What's going on here?
Jay has no faith in his sister,
so we're watching her
do administrative tasks.
Setting up the reservation
system, ordering supplies.
It's so boring.
She did almost spill ginger ale
on her computer, but she caught it.
I have faith.
When Bela decides to do something,
she is a force to be reckoned with.
The only thing she has left to do
is order a hundred pounds of shrimp.
Guys, she only has
one pound in the cart.
Oh, this would be a legendary screwup.
[YAWNS]
Bela, stay focused.
Put some zeroes on that order.
[ALBERTA GASPS]
She hit "place order."
That's only one pound of shrimp.
Bela, no.
And that's the game, folks.
Well, should we go tell Jay?
What? No. We got to tell Bela.
We should email her.
No, there's no time.
We're two minutes away
from the 5:00 p.m.
next-day delivery deadline.
I didn't think it was possible,
but this shrimp thing
- actually did get exciting.
- [CHUCKLES]
Wait, the screen is still open.
I can just order more shrimp now.
Jay never needs to know
that Bela messed up.
Yeah, but I told Jay that
I would let him know.
Sass,
I had a brother
who was always underestimated.
I don't want Bela to feel the same way.
So please, just let me take care of it.
Okay, fine. Yeah, you get in
there and order that shrimp.
[LAUGHS] One minute left
for next-day orders.
I'm genuinely exhilarated.
Our lives are so sad.
[STRAINS]
THORFINN: Samantha,
I have something most
urgent to tell you.
Yeah, we heard, Pete is headed
to the wrong village.
HETTY: He still doesn't
realize that we can
hear him screaming
at the top of his lungs.
Situation seems dark,
but if my military career
taught me one thing,
you can always give up,
and I suggest we do that here.
We're not giving up.
If only there was some way
to contact Peter.
Admittedly, the fact that
he's halfway around the world
and a ghost complicates things.
Wait. Pete knew that this
was gonna be a tight trip,
So he made a
down-to-the-minute itinerary,
which I have right here
on my computer. [CHUCKLES]
Ugh. Stupid pop-up ads.
Wait, you're saying that we know
where Peter is going to be
at any given moment?
Exactly. Every flight, every bus,
train, ferry and walk.
We just need to find a way
to send him a message.
But that feels impossible.
Which, not to just push my thing,
brings us back to my "giving up" plan.
It could not be easier to execute.
Ugh, damn these ads.
Wait a minute. This gives me an idea.
You're gonna get tickets
to Jersey Boys on tour?
It just might work.
SAMANTHA: No.
We send Pete our own kind of pop-up ad.
All right.
What's this?
"Go to Soørlia, not Steinkjer."
How did they know I'd be here?
[GASPS] The itinerary.
Nice work, Sammy.
Okay, it's gonna be tight,
but you're still looking solid.
[EXAGGERATED SIGH]
JAY: Why are there two
separate orders of shrimp?
This is like 200 pounds.
This is way more than we need.
Wait, this isn't right.
Well, I did order 100 pounds
from these guys.
But I only ordered one pound
from these guys.
Wait, she was ordering
the one pound on purpose?
What are you talking about?
Well, the place you gave me
was super expensive.
But then I remembered my friend Katie
is dating this hot shrimper up in Maine,
so I DM'd him on Instagram
and had him overnight the order.
Okay, but why did she order
the single pound of the other shrimp?
But I know you, and I know you
wouldn't be happy
unless you had a sample
of the expensive shrimp,
so you could see for yourself
they're not as good.
So that's why I ordered a small sample.
That's actually pretty smart.
Or it would've been
if we hadn't ruined it.
Small sample?
We're drowning in shrimp, Bela.
Sam, get in here! We need you!
Well, clearly the one place
sent too much.
Or you screwed up.
Okay, Jay, let's not say
anything we're going to regret.
This is a huge waste of money.
You know what? It's on me.
I should've just handled this myself.
Jay, I didn't order this. Trust me.
- Hey, guys.
- JAY: Great. Perfect timing.
Sam, can you ask Sass if he saw Bela
screw up this shrimp order?
Why would Sass know what happened?
Don't love that I'm the face of this.
Because I asked him to spy on you,
because I was worried that you
were gonna mess something up.
And guess what? You did.
Sam, can you tell Jay
we ordered the extra shrimp?
- What?
- Trevor did it on the computer.
You had a ghost spy on me? Wow.
You really don't think much of me, huh?
- Bela, wait.
- No, whatever.
All I wanted to do was help my brother.
Sam, tell him.
Okay, I'm just kind of
catching up on all this,
but the ghosts are here and they said
to tell you they ordered the shrimp.
What? Why?
They thought she screwed up,
and they were trying to cover for her.
Oh, man, I just yelled at Bela.
God, I'm such a jerk.
I kind of feel like a bit of a
jerk right now, too, to be honest.
We should've had faith in her.
Well, in our defense, the woman arrived
with a gas station nozzle
sticking out of her tank.
That's true. There was context.
I am Gorm, son of Gorm.
Oh, thank God.
I have been up and down
the Norwegian coast
talking to anyone without a pulse.
And finally I found you. [CHUCKLES]
The man they say has the information
I've been looking for.
Hey, look like we both die from arrow.
I get mine defending village
from army of 300 raiders.
How you get yours?
Uh, s-similar. Yeah, very similar.
Um, anyway, back to the reason
why I sought you out.
Uh, did you ever travel to the New World
with a guy named Thorfinn?
Uh, he loves cod and murdering.
Oh, yeah, I know of whom you speak.
Great. Well, I'm sort of his roommate
and I'm trying to get
to the bottom of why
his shipmates abandoned him
a thousand years ago.
Is very long and sad tale.
It was a very cold morning when
the ship set sail from Norway
And that is story
why Thorfinn abandoned.
Not to be rude,
but do you know
that your arm is disappearing?
Holy king crab!
I got to get a move on.
Uh, the 4:30 ferry picks up right here?
Most days, yes. Not today.
Today Sámi Day, national holiday.
- No ferry today.
- No, no, no, t-that can't be right.
See, I was a travel agent
when I was alive.
I know every travel-affecting
holiday there is.
Sámi Day new.
W-When is the next ferry?
8:00 a.m. tomorrow.
Oh, no.
Is terrible. Samantha should've
been back from airport
with Pete hours ago.
Where are they?
This is by far the longest
Peter's ever been gone.
I wonder what happens if
he completely disappears.
Is it bad that I sort of
want to find out?
I disappeared once.
Turns out I was just down
a well. It's a crazy story.
I'll tell you guys about it some time.
[DOOR CLOSES]
I couldn't find Pete.
I waited for him all day at the airport,
but he never showed up.
- Oh.
- This all Thor's fault.
Can't believe we'll never hear
Pete's happy little voice again.
PETE: Son of a biscuit!
Voice haunting Thor.
Wait. No, it's Peter!
[WHIMPERING]
[GRUNTING]
Oh.
[LAUGHING]
Oh. Oh.
[GASPING]
[LAUGHS]
Pete! Thank Odin you're home.
Why weren't you at the airport?
Oh, it was a whole thing.
Basically, Sámi Day threw
a wrench in my whole plan.
I had to fly into Newark instead of JFK,
then I had to crawl
from the nearest bus stop.
You drove right past me, Sam.
I did? I didn't see
You didn't see the one arm dragging
the severed torso up your driveway?
- I think I might've been texting.
- ISAAC: No judgement.
I was once reading
a Thomas Paine leaflet
and drove my carriage
right into a donkey.
[CHUCKLES] Guess I wasn't
showing a lot of "common sense."
Did you find out what happened to Thor?
I did.
Was it conspiracy? Betrayal?
Did ship captain fear that Thor
was threat to replace him
due to Thor natural charisma?
Actually
they just miscounted.
What?
Yeah, I guess they did a head count
and at first a guy named Ivar
was wearing a hat
and then he took the hat off
and they counted him twice.
So, they left Thor by mistake?
They not even know Thor missing?
Well, they realized
their mistake eventually,
but by that point, they were
halfway across the Atlantic
and they'd gone the long way
to avoid the great monster.
Sure, best to avoid the great monster.
So they just sailed home.
They were so embarrassed
by what happened
that they decided to make up a story
and say that you wandered off.
So they just forget Thor?
I'm sorry, Thor.
According to Gorm,
they felt really bad about it.
But not bad enough to turn around.
I dealt with the great monster
during travels, once.
It's what we call John Jay's
sensitive tummy.
That man could stink up a carriage.
[SIGHS]
Hey, Bela, you got a sec?
Don't worry, I'm packing up to leave.
Won't be able to mess
anything else up for you.
I owe you an apology.
Turns out, Trevor's the one
who ordered the extra shrimp.
He thought you made a mistake
and he was just trying
to have your back.
Really? So he still thinks about me?
You know, I met him in person
and he's not that handsome.
I'm lying, he's beautiful.
We're never telling Trevor
about any of this.
Nope, we're taking this to our graves.
- Or, you know what I mean.
- Yeah.
I'm sorry, okay?
I should've trusted you.
Look, I get why you were worried.
I've screwed up
at a lot of different jobs.
Maybe because I never
really cared about them.
But you're my brother.
This restaurant is your dream.
I take that incredibly seriously.
I might live to regret this, but
would you maybe want
to manage the restaurant?
Wow, that's a serious show of faith.
On an interim basis.
Okay, a little hedge,
but still something.
Do you really mean that?
Don't answer. No take backs.
I'm in.
[CHUCKLES]
For real, though, Jay,
this is so sweet.
It means the world to me.
Sometimes you're a pretty good guy.
And you'll call Mom
and you'll tell her what I did?
Sure. Um, but
can I borrow your phone?
Mine fell in the toilet.
Sure.
These two dingbats.
God love 'em.
Hey. We just wanted to see
how you were doing.
I'm fine, but you might
want to ask Thor.
He's processing some terrible news.
Thor, in a way,
your abandonment is kind of
a best-case scenario.
It was an accident.
And as I've told the grieving parents
of many factory workers over the years,
accidents happen.
Thor appreciate you all
for trying to help, but
Thor doing okay.
When Pete not return,
Thor not thinking about finding
answer to abandonment.
Only thing Thor think about is Pete.
Aw, buddy.
Worrying about friends from past
almost make Thor
lose friend from today.
Maybe what Thor really need is to
let go of past
and appreciate the people
that surround him now.
Wow, that's really healthy, Thor.
Thor take two sessions
of therapy in four years.
Thor very evolved.
Thor did the work.
I think I'm gonna take
a page out of Thor's book
and forgive my mom
for leaving me at Target.
Again, not same thing.
No, absolutely not the same thing.
But sort of similar.
Pete
you come through for Thor
in way that shipmates did not.
Thank you.
FLOWER: Aw.
I love that you're feeling
so close to Pete right now.
I don't like where this is going.
I'm just saying, it would be
rude of me and Thor
not to thank you properly.
And we're not rude.
If anything should transpire,
please report back
regarding "the hammer."
Tell me how you're feeling this week.
Well, I do have some new issues
that have risen to the surface.
I'm listening.
Uh, I almost died
coming back from Norway last week.
It got pretty hairy.
You went to Norway since
the last time I saw you?
Sam, say my thing.
Uh, there's more. I was stuck in a well
for a time last year, it was dark.
And wormy. Say wormy.
SAMANTHA: What else? Oh, right.
I'm still a virgin.
Aren't you married?
Yeah, it's weird.
It's not weird.
Do we really have to
do this all together
- in the same session?
- It's an insurance thing.
Now say mine, Samantha.
Also, I'm very torn up to
recently learn that I'm Irish.
I think we're gonna
need to start meeting
multiple times a week.
Huh. Honey, she can't afford that.