Mad Men s04e11 Episode Script

I have sand in the weirdest places.
Jones Beach? Don't be so sure it's sand.
Hold up.
We got hitchers.
Made it.
I see that.
Hey.
Hi.
Girls, on the hop.
You gotta get up.
All I want to say is I did not plan this.
Nobody talk.
I'm really stoned.
I'm sorry.
You weigh, like, a pound or less.
I see you went in.
I like the water.
Can I quote you on that? I'm learning.
My God.
You're a slob.
We have to be quiet.
I have a roommate.
God, I love your shoulders.
You look like you're in the Olympics.
You never stop talking.
It was like the movies.
One minute we're listening to a lecture on rhododendrons, and the next, Patricia is driving like a speed racer to the hospital.
And Trudy keeps apologizing in the back seat, and we're saying, "it's okay.
Nobody cares.
You're having a baby!" Meanwhile, Campbell's on the back nine with his father-in-law, who's also a client.
That's a nice way to end a round.
Ken Cosgrove.
Don't get up.
John Flory.
This is my fiancée, Cynthia, Her parents, Ed and Lillian Baxter.
-Sorry to interrupt.
-It's a pleasure.
Nice to meet you.
Aren't you lucky? I'm spending my Sunday night with Dodge.
Nice to see you, Ken.
And, listen, I'm sorry about, you know My condolences.
David Montgomery? I was only there for about six months.
I didn't really know him.
Right.
Well, I should be on my way.
It was nice meeting you all.
Flory.
Look, you're with your family.
I shouldn't have said anything.
You didn't.
What's going on? Lucky Strike.
They're coming over to us.
What? Look, you didn't hear it from me, okay? -You're winding me up.
-No.
American Tobacco came in last Monday, said they're moving all the brands to us.
Well, that's not true.
Someone should tell Lee Garner, Jr.
that.
Sorry.
You okay, son? Whenever ad men meet, all they do is brag and brag, and it's hard not to get rattled.
Ed, Lillian, you'll have to excuse me.
Sweetheart, I swear to you I wouldn't do this if it wasn't serious.
Ken! What a pleasant surprise! There's nothing much to celebrate yet.
They were going to send Trudy home, but her mother protested.
I sent her for food just to get rid of her.
Anyway, I suppose your visit is premature.
-I shouldn't use that word around here.
-Can I talk to you? John Flory, some prick over at BBDO, just told me that Lucky Strike is going there.
What? You made me wait for you while you worked.
I'm not waiting anymore.
I should get it.
Of course.
The kids.
-Hello? -it's Pete.
Have you heard anything about Lucky Strike leaving? No.
Ken heard from somebody at BBDO that Lucky's coming over.
-Bullshit.
Call Roger.
-I did.
He's out.
Wake Cooper.
Meet me in the office.
What happened? I'm not sure.
I have to make a call.
Hello? What's going on? Ken here heard that Lucky Strike is leaving.
That they've already left.
What? Who told you that? John Flory.
He's an account executive at BBDO.
That's where they're going.
-No.
That's impossible.
-Call him.
I'm telling you, it's impossible.
Don't lose your temper.
Somebody call Lane in London? Yeah, I don't think he'll go back to sleep.
Could I get a drink? It's ringing.
Lee.
Roger Sterling.
From your agency.
Well, it's serious.
He's drunk.
You're damn right I heard.
Because you can consolidate your business here.
Just because your father's non compos mentis doesn't mean you have to listen to the board.
It's bullshit! Lee! Thirty years! I have to hear it on the street? No review? Nothing? He hung up.
It's true? I need to sit down.
Tomorrow morning, we're getting on the 6:00 a.
m.
to Raleigh-Durham.
I'll do it.
I've known him half my life.
I need a drink.
What time is it? Midnight.
You want one? Looks like you need both.
It looks like Lucky Strike might have gone south.
Holy crap.
Obviously, we'd like to avoid that information getting out.
What happened? Supposedly, they're consolidating for a reduced commission at BBDO.
Hey, watch it.
You have to keep a clear head.
Every day, I tried not to think about what would happen if this happened.
Look at that plum.
What's that? That face.
You're the most hirable man on Madison Avenue.
I'm not at that point yet.
Okay.
How's Trudy? Her mother's got her all worked up.
She made such a stink.
And that thing's at least another day away.
Can I see her? Have you been drinking? You need to calm down.
I was at a ballgame when Trudy was born.
Go about your business.
Are you all right? Could I speak with you candidly? Always.
I'd like to think I'm more to you than a typical father-in-law.
You are.
That's the problem.
It's about business.
There's no business in here, son.
We may have lost Lucky Strike.
I'm sure this agency was a thrill, but you've had your folly.
That's not right, Tom.
I haven't stayed at Vick Chemical for 28 years because I love it.
It's because I have a family.
And any minute here, you will, too.
This still can work.
I'm not rooting against you.
You've got my account, for God's sake.
It's just You're a frequent topic at CGC.
Now, apparently, you were a tough act to follow when we moved Clearasil over there.
Ted Chaough? I hate him.
He's a good guy.
He's not interested in me.
He's just trying to hobble Don.
There's no reward in going down with the ship.
I have an agency.
I'm a partner.
I found him.
He was down at the candy machines, dozed off.
-Can I see her? -No.
She finally went to sleep.
Why don't you just go back to the candy machines and we'll wait.
I'm sorry about that.
Well, the air conditioning guy's supposed to be there at 8:00.
I guess I'll see you, then.
You don't want me to go? I want you to do whatever you usually do.
Hey, I don't usually do anything.
Really? Can't you tell by how badly I'm leaving? I'm not letting you leave.
What about your air? You're unbelievable.
I'm sorry.
I'm not usually like this.
Hello? I just walked out of there.
it's over.
I see.
Since his father got sick, the board took over, and there's no point in talking to them.
He said we did good work.
Our clients need to hear this from us.
I know, Bert.
Don't wait for me.
I'm standing by Lee's receptionist.
I didn't want to have to pay for the long-distance call.
Very well, then.
Lane Pryce isn't coming back.
That's my guess.
I think they'd do that in a memo.
And I got five that says Cooper's retiring.
No champagne? I'd say he's got cancer.
-it's in bigger print now.
-Everyone, if we could have your attention, please.
Bert.
"We have called this meeting of our nearest and dearest "to let you know of a change in the agency.
"After 30 years of consummate service, "American Tobacco has reluctantly decided "to consolidate their business at Batten, Barton, Durstine & Osborn.
" Damn it.
"So what does this mean to you? "Now, Donald Draper, partner, creative director.
" Pete Campbell and Ken Cosgrove will handle calls to clients.
Those are the only calls we want made with this news.
Now, we've had a pretty good year.
We've gained more accounts than We've lost, a lot more, because our work is thoughtful and effective.
Even Lucky Strike said so.
Which means that nothing should change.
Nothing will change.
We're gonna push ourselves shoulder to shoulder, and we're gonna overcome this and succeed tenfold, and it will be exhilarating.
Joe.
As Don said, "Nothing is going to change.
" There's only a small modification in policy.
Anything out of the ordinary must be approved by myself, Joan Harris or Lane Pryce.
And that said, inquiries as to paychecks and advances -What's going on? -That's the head of accounting.
-What do you think is going on? -Any questions? Nothing? Okay.
If you want to talk to me individually, I'll be in my office.
What happened? We lost Lucky Strike.
Jesus.
But it sounds like everything's under control.
I think I should go to a meeting.
Peggy, Freddy, Danny, Stan, in my office.
We're in some trouble here.
Creative needs to be on its toes.
Is it a "last hired, last fired" sort of thing? You're in this room.
That's all I can say.
Now, myself and the other partners will be out there beating the bushes for new business, but creative's job is to hold on to what we have.
That means clients' ideas should seem better than they normally do.
For the next few weeks, the only words you know are, "Yes, sir.
" -Yes, sir.
-That means, Stan, you babysit that Samsonite shoot every day.
And, Peggy, the Playtex presentation is still set for tomorrow.
I'll bring in my notes.
I can prep you in 10 minutes.
No.
You're still gonna do it.
It'll look desperate if I'm suddenly involved.
So, what about it then? Be successful.
I'm not worried.
Okay.
Let's skip the gossip out there.
Get to work.
Peggy.
You're not worried? I don't know.
You seem to have everything in hand.
Should I be worried? We don't even know how bad this is gonna be until Lane shows up.
Every time something good happens, something bad happens.
I knew I'd pay for it.
You're not paying for anything.
But I'm counting on you.
Close that, will you? Joan Harris.
Jeanie, I'm glad you're there.
I'm so sorry.
I feel so guilty.
It's not your fault.
I need to see you.
I need you to come down here.
I'm not flying to Raleigh.
When do you get back? No, I'm here.
What are you talking about? Mr.
Cooper said he spoke with you.
He did, but I didn't go.
Damn it, Roger.
Get on a plane.
You're very persuasive in person.
There's no point.
It's been over for weeks.
Garner was supposed to give me a month, and the bastard couldn't keep to it.
You knew about it? I can't believe you.
We could've done something.
Don't yell at me.
You know what it's been like walking around with this? I got a hole in my gut.
What am I supposed to do with this information? I'm sorry.
But I need you to know why I need to see you.
You should've told me.
Why didn't you tell me? I kept meaning to say something.
I thought I still had time.
I don't know.
I should go.
There's a lot of work to do.
Come after work.
I'm at the Statler.
I had to stay away from Midtown.
I'll have to see.
I think my setup is good, but Don always has these little examples at the end that explain to the client how big the idea is.
And they're always kind of poetic.
So get Don to write it.
We can't lose this.
Since when do we have doughnuts? Condemned man always gets his choice of a last meal.
You know what Pete Campbell just said to me? He said if anybody sends a resume out of here, they're gonna get executed.
Fellas, we're on an account right now.
Playtex gloves protect a woman's hands, so they're soft enough to touch all the things a woman wants to touch.
All the things? The exciting things she wants to feel with her fingertips.
His lips, the tuft of hair on his chest, the small of his back.
-I can't imagine Don saying that.
-Excuse me, I have a delivery for Peggy Olson.
What? Are you Peggy Olson? It's COD.
Let me get my purse.
Go ahead without me.
I'm going to take care of this and then practice.
Am I wrong or is she giving it off? Well, it's the last days of Rome.
I was in an agency that went down.
The women get sex crazed.
The energy is very good.
They said they wanted to revise the media plan, but I think what they really wanted was a budget to see how much of their money we haven't spent yet.
Who are we talking about? Birds Eye.
Why are we worrying about existing accounts? If anything, they're going to get more attention.
Because they're afraid we won't be here.
I have news from London.
Pete, wake up! Lane thinks our billings are probably around $22 million without Lucky, but he has to look at everything in person.
When's he coming? As soon as he can.
David Montgomery's memorial is tomorrow afternoon.
In case we need cheering up? The man was senior vice-president of accounts at the number four agency.
There's gonna be a lot of vulnerable clients in attendance.
I think Roger knew him.
Sorry to interrupt.
It's AI Weaver from Glo-Coat.
-What does he want? -I don't know.
Do you want me on the call? Didn't you talk to him this morning? No.
AI, how are you? Hello, Don- I'm glad I could reach you.
I just wanted to let you know we appreciate everything you've done for us, but we've decided to take the account in a different direction.
-All right.
AI -I want you to know it wasn't an easy decision.
-Now can I talk? -Sure.
I don't think you understand what's happened here.
And I'm not talking about losing Lucky Strike.
Lucky Strike didn't enter into it.
Really? So that has nothing to do with this? Don, it's a simple coincidence that it happened now.
Okay, you're right.
It is bad timing.
How can you blame us for wanting to move on? Because that commercial, that little cowboy kid, was the first successful strategy you've been near since you sponsored Fibber McGee and Molly.
-We won the CLIO! -You won the CLIO.
With work we did for you! With your direction! Believe me, we know how it looks, but it's just business, plain and simple.
I'm coming out there.
We're gonna talk about this in person.
I'm sorry, Don.
The decision's been made.
I just thought you should hear it from me.
You know we're gonna want another shot at this soon.
As long as you're around.
We'll be here.
Don't worry.
Good luck, Don.
I hope we can work together again sometime.
Okay.
-Goodbye.
-Good bye.
What was that? Nothing.
Do you want ice? No, but I need a favor.
Make sure I don't overdo it.
Okay.
How do I It's hard to tell with you.
Stop me at three.
This is one.
The doctor says they never let the labor go past two sunsets.
What exactly is the problem? Apparently Trudy's pelvis is too small and the baby's shoulders can't get through.
They should cut it out.
They don't like to start there.
Go to the hospital.
There's nothing to do here.
It's obviously what matters to you.
What? I don't know what the hell you said to them this morning.
So, Joan, that puts us at what, $20 million and change? Are you doubting my efforts? All you had to do was tell them everything was fine.
You think that call's easy to make? I think you're distracted.
And because of that, I think you scared the shit out of them.
Who the hell do you think you're talking to? Don't blow a gasket.
He called looking for me and my secretary told him where I was.
Incredible.
That was something else.
There he is.
The man of the hour.
Ted.
How considerate of you to stop by.
I wish the baby was here already, but I'm sure everyone feels that way.
Good news is always worth waiting for.
Well, Jeannie, remember, don't let your vanity get the best of you.
There is nothing wrong with being called "grandma" It's a rattle.
You can get it engraved.
Ogilvy sent me one when my son was born.
Thank you.
What do you want, Ted? No, this is about what you want.
I mean, hell, you're about to have everything the minute that baby comes.
You know your father-in-law never stops talking about you? And he doesn't know the half of it.
You've brought in a little business since you went out on your own.
Glo-Coat, Life Cereal, Sugarberry Hams, Vick Chemical, obviously, Mountain Dew, Fillmore Auto, Birds Eye, Ponds.
I didn't do all that by myself.
Pete, as far as I'm concerned, you're what's missing from CGC.
Jim Cutler's due to retire.
Campbell, Gleason & Chaough? Has a nice ring to it.
Wouldn't you want your name first? I'm open to it if we're having that discussion.
You'll have a full voting third.
I'm not Don.
it's not the Wild West.
We just got Alfa Romeo, little italian sports car.
I don't know if you've heard of it, but I think you'll really enjoy driving one.
-I don't drive.
-I'll teach you.
Tom, Jeannie, remember, my offer still stands.
If you want a hotel room, I can get you one across the street.
Roger.
I let you come over because you said you needed to talk.
We can talk.
Jeanie, I need you.
Stop it, or we can talk on the phone.
Is that what you sleep in now? What do you want? I'm exhausted! I waited for you at the hotel.
Why didn't you come? Are you mad at me? No! But, Roger, I can't do this anymore.
You always say that.
Then you come back to me because we belong together.
Don't do that.
I need you right now.
Because I'm a port in a storm? No.
Because I feel like shit, and you care about me.
I'm not a solution to your problems.
I'm another problem.
Are you serious? I can't do this anymore.
You'll change your mind.
You'll see.
I'm sorry.
I just can't do this anymore.
So what are you trying to say? Roger So that night we got mugged, that was the last time? Wish I'd known that.
God, I'd think this place would be packed still.
It's 8:00.
There's only so much we can pretend like we're doing.
-Are you okay? -You want something? I'd rather eat, but that's me.
I'm one over for the day.
See that? I kissed you and it got quiet.
How'd it go? It was miserable.
Clients are running scared.
I'm used to having my ideas rejected, not me.
How do you do it? My job is to present facts.
If they're unhappy with the agency, it's not my problem.
Who's unhappy? Come on.
Clients are always unhappy.
Yeah? Like who? -Are you kidding? -No.
Why? I'm drowning here.
You know I can't do that.
If a client is unhappy, they're unhappy.
There's nothing against telling them to have dinner with me.
Or, if you don't want to, tell me who they are.
I'll call them out of the blue.
I can't do that.
Sure you can.
Who'll know? The standard of ethics in this business is low enough.
And God knows I've done some things I'm not proud of, but those other agencies pay me.
What about protecting the clients? So I'm gonna kill my business to save yours? It's not your business.
It's Atherton's.
This is different.
This is everything to me.
I don't believe this.
You want a shoulder to cry on, fine.
You want to throw me to the wolves so you can save your neck, forget it.
-I would do it for you.
-I would never ask.
I would never use you like that.
Because I know the difference between what we have and this stupid office.
Mr.
Cosgrove says Playtex just left the hotel.
Thank you! God, I'm so nervous.
You need to relax.
I can't do this drunk.
I know a technique that can really take the nerves away.
I learned it from a yogi.
Show me.
Close your eyes.
Now, take a deep breath.
Fill your lungs until you can't anymore.
Stick out your stomach.
Now release it in a cool stream right in my face.
Hey! What are you doing? You said you wanted to relax.
Let's relax.
Stan, no.
Come on.
You're so horny I can smell it on your breath.
Stan, knock it off.
Hey, I saw you with the delivery boy yesterday.
What? He's my boyfriend.
Come on, baby.
It's the end of the world.
Why do you keep making me reject you? I was trying to do you a favor.
Well, thank you.
I'm not anxious anymore.
Should I get the door? No.
It didn't get any worse.
What exactly did he say? He said they were terrified about the British banning cigarette ads from TV, and they need to cut costs.
Maybe it's a good time to get out of this business.
That's crap.
Sales were up 10%.
You do what you can do.
David Montgomery's memorial is in 40 minutes at the River Club.
David Montgomery died? Well, there's your silver lining.
Who the hell wants to go to that? We're trying to get new accounts.
Remember how to do that? You wanna dogpile on me? Saving that account was impossible.
Because you ignored it! One damn account, and you ignored it.
You don't know what you're talking about.
Pete, explain it to him.
You squeezed me off of it, Roger.
You wanted it all to yourself.
He would have never let this happen! But you do what you can do, which is nothing! Hey, you're the one who dragged me into your amateur hour.
I was perfectly happy where I was.
And why did I do it? Out of friendship.
But now that the account's gone, I guess that went with it.
Get out of here, all of you.
Go chase a hearse.
Sorry to interrupt.
Mr.
Campbell, your father-in-law called.
Your wife and your daughter are resting comfortably.
Just now? Yes, it happened.
You've got a baby girl.
-Congratulations.
-Congratulations.
Good job.
Thank you, Megan.
Okay, we should get going.
Let me get my coat.
Where does Draper get off? Lee Garner, Jr.
never took you seriously because you never took yourself seriously.
Are you ready? No hard feelings? None at all.
Everything good? Absolutely.
And so, I think about that night, staring out the window of that Detroit hotel room, knowing we were going home with Buick, and saying to David, "Is this the best thing we're ever going to do?" Lynn, it was your fifth birthday.
And the next day, when we were in the airport, he showed me this pendant he'd bought the day before downtown.
And as he closed the box, he said, "Crosby, that's the best thing I'll ever do.
" I know it's hard, but Dave loved you more than anything, sweetheart.
That's Stu Carlsbad from Ralston Purina.
He's always ripe.
We have dog food experience.
I got him.
I don't know how prepared I am, but Dave was always a fan of winging it.
Beth, his beautiful wife, you were there before he made partner, and then you gave him to us.
But you know you and Lynnie were always on his mind.
True story.
We'd been in London for three months trying to nail down British Petroleum.
Never happened.
But once a week, he would drag me to Portobello Road looking for thimbles for your collection, Lynn.
Silver thimbles.
And he was an expert.
It's because Playtex is strong enough to protect a woman's hands.
Through her fingertips, she can dry the tears of a child or feel the warmth of her husband's skin.
Playtex protects a woman's touch.
It's very romantic.
I have to admit, when you first brought it up, I didn't think that was possible for latex gloves.
These images are about the moments after the housework is over.
They're about the meaningful life a woman leads when work is done.
Well, I feel pretty good about this.
Peggy, our pleasure.
We're thrilled to get this in the first try.
Now, I'm gonna let you get back to the hotel, and then steaks and a show.
That went well.
You have lipstick all over your teeth.
What? Why are you still here? I didn't know if I should leave or not.
How was the funeral? We'll see.
Get me the campaign briefs on Ken's accounts, and then you can go.
And send Peggy in.
Miss Olson's gone for the night, but if you need help Did you do that? I thought, in the end, you wouldn't want to throw it away.
You're wrong.
That commercial was great, and nothing they do can change that.
I'll take those.
Thank you.
You can go.
You sure you don't want some help? This is a little complicated.
That's okay.
I'd really like to learn what goes on here.
Really? Well, first of all, I think it would help me from making mistakes with your work the way I have.
And, secondly, I think I'd like, eventually, to do what you do, or what Miss Olson does.
I didn't know that.
Unless you'd rather be alone.
I don't want to be in the way.
No.
I don't mind.
This is a strategy statement signed by Fillmore Auto Parts.
Copywriters stray from these midstream sometimes if they have a better idea, but we can't take that chance now.
Wouldn't clients want a better idea? What'd you like about the commercial? You're putting me on the spot.
I know it's a floor wax, but I really remember that feeling of being a little kid and feeling like I was being punished when my mother cleaned the house.
-Where are you from? -Montreal.
We didn't have Glo-Coat.
Why'd you move here? Well, first of all, it's New York.
For an artist, it's Mecca.
You're an artist? I wouldn't say I'm an artist.
I'm an artistic person.
I majored in literature, and I've dabbled in writing and painting and a little bit of acting.
What are you laughing about? Because I just realized I Know everything about you.
I mean, you're in my head all day, even when I go home, and you don't know anything about me.
Well, you haven't been here that long.
And you don't know how long I will be, so why get to know me? I can see that's what everybody must think.
You judge people on their work.
I'm the same way.
Everything else is sentimental.
You want one? How many is that? Four.
I know you're angry, but I hope you're not afraid, because you will get through this.
You don't know that.
Why do you care what I think? Megan, I don't think this is a good idea.
This has nothing to do with work.
I can't make any mistakes right now.
Let's be clear.
I'm not gonna run out of here crying tomorrow.
I just want you right now.
Hey.
Where are you going? I'm exhausted.
How was your day? Fine.
I know how to make it better.
I'm really tired.
Sit down.
What'd you buy? Look.
Look at it.
Sign it.
"To my loving wife.
" I'm so proud of you.
You should go first.
Actually, I should go first.
Do you want to grab a bite? I want you to go home and I want you to sleep.
And I don't want you drinking any more tonight.
Wait.
Did you want to go first? Good night, Mr.
Draper.
Didn't expect to see you here.
I was going to call, but I didn't want to do this over the phone.
So you were gonna write it on an envelope.
Can I come inside? I got you a meeting with Heinz.
It's vinegar, sauces and beans.
They're at Ketchum, MacLeod, and they're restless.
Faye I thought about what you said, and I thought about you.
And I thought about, "Whatever.
You are my life right now.
" You didn't have to do this.
I wanted to.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Do you wanna stay? I'll probably fall asleep on you.
Just sit with me.