Party of Five s04e11 Episode Script

S'Wunnerful Life

Are you eating? Mostly just puking.
I know it's hard, but your body needs nutrition.
You're fighting both the disease and the treatment, so Now It looks like your white cell count is a little on the low side.
Not enough to be alarmed about, but we need to keep an eye on it.
If it doesn't build back up by Monday, we may have to suspend treatments for a week or so just as a precaution.
Wait a minute, you mean You mean stretch this out even longer? I know it's not a pleasant thought, but Chances are, come Monday, you'll be ok.
You've got the whole weekend to recharge, so Yeah.
I was kind of eyeing the wonder years marathon on cable.
The important thing is to relax.
Chances are There's nothing to worry about.
You keep saying "Chances are.
" Just a figure of speech.
Anyway Have a nice weekend.
Is that a figure of speech, too? Just Try to take it easy.
It-it's a chant kind of thing.
"Owah.
" That's the first word.
"Tadoo" is second, then "fiyam" Want me to give you a hand with this? No.
Just got to get back in the corners here.
Roaches are nimble.
So then, the brothers, they line you up in your briefs, and they throw corn meal, honey, and raw eggs at you while you hop on one foot and chant, "owah, tadoo, fiyam.
Owah, tadoo, fiyam.
Owah" "oh, what a doof you are.
" I get it.
Here, give me a hand.
Slide this back, will you? And watch the linoleum.
So then, they fill your briefs with seltzer tablets and throw you in the lake, but that's another story.
And you do all this because Because, when we get back from Christmas, I get to do it to some new pledges.
That's the beauty of it.
Gamma nu, man, gamma nu! Grab that, will you? I'm all over it.
Gamma nu Yes, ma'am? Oh.
Uh I'm I'm looking for Bailey.
Bailey: Annie! Hey! Hi.
So This is Annie.
Annie, this is will.
Oh, right! Bailey told me you were home for the holidays.
Nice to meet you.
I got the rest of the mail, mommy.
You, too.
Oh, thanks, sweet pea.
Hi, sweetie.
Yeah, uh, Bailey's told me a lot about you.
Really? He hasn't told me nearly enough about you.
Um, anyway, look, I'm sorry to barge in on you guys No.
But it came.
It already? Open it, mommy.
Yeah.
Go for it.
Great.
Here goes.
Oh.
Oh, my.
Oh, my god.
"Oh, my god"? Oh, my god! I did it! You did it? You did it! I did! She did it! Ooh! I'm sorry.
"It" I'm gonna be an insurance adjuster! Yes! Everybody wants to live like they wanna live and everybody wants to love Like they wanna love everybody wants to be closer to free-ee-ee-ee closer to free Hello! You're You're crushing me! Oh, god, sorry.
Ok, right here.
On 3.
God, I thought we swept.
And vacuumed and mopped.
What'd you expect? It's a shed.
Stop calling it a shed and help me out.
I want this place to look nice before Justin gets here.
I hope he's not coming till July.
Claudia, stop it.
I'm trying to make the best of this, ok? Ok, I'm sorry.
Maybe I can help.
You know, put in some Some Christmas lights or, uh Maybe a tree.
Yeah, and you know what? I've got a lot of extra time while Elliot's away, so I could make curtains and paint, you know.
We could turn it into a chateau or a cottage Hey! What are you guys doing in the shed? Justin! Hey! Hi.
Hi.
Uh Wow! You're early.
Yeah.
Half hour with my folks and I, uh Need a little air.
What are you guys doing? Julie and Griffin are moving into the shed.
Stop calling it a shed.
I thought Didn't you say you were, uh You guys had some great apartment or What? Oh, yeah.
Well, you know, with Charlie and all, we thought, um We're We're turning it into a guest cottage, actually.
You know, coat of paint and curtains and wow! Look at you.
Yeah.
I mean, uh, the Yale thing's really working for you.
Yeah? Well, thank you.
Uh That's pretty cool.
Yeah, well, you have to be sure to come to my tree-trimming party tomorrow night and brag about it to everybody.
Yeah.
The hallowed halls and crew and the smell of Ivy.
That's Yale.
Yeah.
Well I can't wait to hear all about it.
Now, if it won't start, pat the gas twice, take your foot off, turn the key.
As soon as it catches Gun it.
I know.
You said.
And I put furniture pads and rope in the back seat to tie on the armoire when you get it.
Perfect.
Oh, I can't wait for you to see it.
Hey, you're good at this.
What do you think is the quickest way there? I thought you'd been there before.
When I was 9.
I can barely remember my great-aunt, much less how to get to her house.
And anyway, the armoire's in storage, so Well, let's see: Probably the 5 to the 20 Can't Paul read a map? He got stuck with a 36-hour shift, so I'm going it alone.
Don't ask.
Wait a minute.
If you're If you're gonna go alone Why don't I come with you? What? Charlie, no.
I can manage.
I know you can manage.
That's not it.
I just I really want to go, that's all.
Let me come along for the ride.
You need to rest.
The doctor said The doctor said that I need to recharge, and I'm going crazy in this house so I could use some Some kind of distraction.
I know, but You can't be bouncing around that truck and lifting things and exerting yourself.
What exerting? You drive.
I'll ride shotgun.
And it's just a day trip.
We'll be back here by 4:00.
Come on, Charlie.
You sure that this is a good idea? Look, you guys got to stop babying me, ok? 'Cause I need this.
I need to I don't know, do something different.
Please let me come with you.
Thanks.
Ok.
Chocolate suicide for madame adjuster.
What are you guys gonna eat? Come on, man.
It's a celebration.
Dig in.
Drown your sorrows.
Uh, I gotta i got to watch my weight.
The sweetheart dance is coming up.
If I don't get a date, my life is, like, over.
Sounds like a problem.
I just This is the greatest thing that could happen to me.
Thank you.
Thank you for getting me to do it.
Hey, I was just a nudge.
You did all the work.
To Adjustments.
So, um, this Adjusting thing, that's a pretty big deal, eh? Oh, like you wouldn't believe.
I mean, and now that I'm licensed, I can get a real job, and I can make some decent money.
And you can send Natalie to that school you've been talking about, too.
Exactly.
That's what I was thinking.
And I'm gonna go on a real budget, too, and I'm gonna pay up my credit card bills and I'm gonna start a college fund for Natalie I can help you with that With the budget.
Income minus essentials equals savings.
Econ.
To savings.
To savings.
I'm dry.
Want some more coffee? Uh, warm up.
Be right back.
Thanks.
I'm sorry, man.
This is probably Boring for you, right? What, are you kidding? I love hanging out with my parents.
I can't believe I haven't seen these.
There was a extra roll of film in the camera.
Oh, wow! You remember the day at the louvre? Oh, do I remember it? I couldn't get you out of there.
You were, like, hell-bent on memorizing every detail.
I was? Please! You said you had to study for your year off so you could get some cool job in the art world.
I was gonna strangle you to get you to shut up.
Only because you wouldn't stop yammering about Yale.
God, you were like a A stuck cd.
Ha ha ha! Wow.
Hey You know what? That's been very interesting, but I got to go to work tomorrow.
Are we sleeping in the shed? The, uh, guest cottage? Yeah.
Good night.
Good night.
I love you.
Love you, too.
Night.
So Yale, is it just Is it everything you thought it'd be? Yeah.
And then some.
It's But you still haven't told me about the museum.
Could you take me on one of your tours? Oh.
Uh, you know what? I must've been so busy I forgot to write and tell you I sort of, uh I got another job, so You did? Mm-hmm.
Well, what kind of job? Um Well, actually, it's at at Taylor's.
The department store? Yeah.
Uh, yeah.
Um Mrs.
Taylor came in for a tour one day, and she was so impressed with my knowledge of, you know, light and color and stuff that she offered me a job.
No kidding.
Mm-hmm.
Uh, doing what? Uh Uh, merchandising and displays.
It's kind of All wrapped into one.
It-it's sort of a junior executive position.
Man.
Who needs higher education? Oh.
Not me.
Wow.
Milan.
Wish we could go back tomorrow.
Christmas time.
What? Did you say something? Oh.
Did I say that out loud? It sounded like "Christmastime"? I know.
I just I saw this house back there all decorated.
When we were kids, mom and dad used to pile us into the car, and we'd drive around the city looking for Christmas lights and decorations.
It was kind of a game, you know.
Yeah.
First one to spot 'em would call "christmastime.
" Anyway You getting tired? Want me to drive? Nope.
I got it.
Christmastime.
Merry Christmas, I don't want to pass it up Here.
Taste my eggnog.
Merry Christmas, I don't want to pass it up Wow! It's good! Is there rum in it? No.
Totally nonalcoholic.
Bailey.
Right.
You know It's great that he's sober and everything.
I mean, it's fantastic.
No question.
Yeah.
No, I know.
But Is it just me, or has he turned into, like, a total adult? I don't know, you know? Ever since he hooked up with Annie, it's like he's this completely different person.
Really? You know, I just I miss the old Bailey, you know? I mean, not the drunk Bailey he was a pain in the ass But the old old Bailey, the one who actually knew how to have a good time, you know? I know.
God, this music is crazy! Yeah.
The brothers were playing it at Christmas chaos.
We head-slammed till, like, Whee! Hey.
Hey! Hey! Hey, hey.
I got to ask you guys to keep it down for a little while.
Ok, Sarah, can I borrow your computer? I got to retype Annie's resumé for her.
She can't do it at work 'cause her boss might catch her Hey, will you stop moving for a second? You got to do that right now, like, this instant? Well No, I don't, but What is with you guys? Just loosen up for 5 minutes, bay.
It's a party.
"Loosen up"? I'm plenty loose, will.
I just told Annie that I would Well, that can wait.
Right? You said so yourself.
Hey Come on.
For your own mental health Head slam.
Just once.
I dare you.
What is the big deal, will? Here.
Look, I can head slam, see? Yeah, lame-ola.
Come on, like you mean it! I want merry Christmas I don't want to pass it up, it's Yeah! Yes! Whoo! Just so you know, I hate you both.
We love you! Are you sure this is the 16? No.
Actually it's, um The 16, actually.
Well, ok.
Um Huh.
What now? Well, we can take the, um Well, that's That's kind of out of the way.
What? That only adds Well, my thumb is It only adds, what, And the back roads are more fun anyway.
Mm.
I know.
But What about Owen and Claudia? There's phones up here.
I'll call.
Besides, if we go through widener's pass, we could stop and eat at at Tony's.
Tony reitano.
He worked for my dad.
He opened a little diner up there, and, uh, I've always wanted to find him.
When am I ever gonna get another chance? Are you sure? I mean, are you Are you ok and everything? I'm fine, Kirsten.
And I want to forget about that for a while, ok? I don't know.
You and me and road trips I'll chance it if you will.
New haven? My god, don't get me started.
Beautiful, huh? Oh, it's pretty Remarkable.
You know, the architecture, the culture You'd go nuts there.
You'd really love it.
Yeah? Yeah.
But enough already.
Tell me about this cool job you got.
It's at emporium? Uh, uh, at Taylor's, actually, and I kind of i told you already, so Do you get a discount? What? A discount.
Oh, yeah.
'cause I have a ton of Christmas shopping to do.
I was maybe I could tag along with you, uh You know, this afternoon, when you go in Well, I already maxed out my discount, you know, the holidays and all, and I'm gonna be at meetings all afternoon.
Oh Board Meetings.
Oh, wow! That's beautiful! Yeah.
For Griffin? Uh, yeah.
It looks just like him.
What's the price? Uh, let's see.
It's, uh Uh$60.
You want to Oh You know what, is is that wool? 'Cause Griffin's allergic.
He breaks out in these big hives, like, the size of pancakes, so Yuck! Forget about it.
Uh-huh.
So anyway, tell me about the art department at Yale.
How's the museum? I already told you about it.
Well, tell me again.
"Open all day every day, Ha ha! Am I missing something here? Oh, I don't know, but I'm starved.
So am I.
Wow, that's Believe it or not, I actually have an appetite.
So, of course, we're in the middle of nowhere, and I haven't seen any other places.
Charlie, you're shivering.
Yeah.
It kind of got cold all of a sudden.
But I'm ok.
Come on, let's go.
You didn't bring a coat? Well, it's not exactly like I packed a suitcase.
Charlie, wait a minute.
This is crazy.
We should head back.
What? Kirsten, I'm fine.
I swear.
No.
You're hungry and cold Will you stop it? This can't be good for you.
No, see, that's where you're wrong.
Ok? This is no big deal, Kirsten.
We can get in the truck and turn the heat on and find another restaurant and keep going.
We've got to keep going, 'cause Being cold and hungry, those are easy.
Those are things I can deal with.
Ok? Come on.
Ok, to the left To the left To the right just a scooch Stop.
There? Well, it's, um Crooked.
Yeah, well, what did you expect? I rescued it from the garland pile.
Hey, no, no, no.
A few ornaments, and you'll never notice.
Huh? What will! Way to go, mccorkle.
Hey, you picked it out.
Come on, I'll mess you up.
You want some of that? Come on! Huh, salinger! What do you wrestle, midgets? Hey, you guys What loser shows up to a party this early? Hi.
Wow, you know what? You're, um, early.
No, i i um, I'm looking for Bailey.
Will: Grab your hand and get the watch! Bailey.
No! Yeah, Annie! Get off me! I'm sorry, I haven't even started your resumé yet.
These guys That's not I need to talk to you.
Ok.
What? What's wrong? Uh I just, uh I got fired.
Woman: Oh, look at this! I mean, the pattern's upside down The bow's on the wrong end! No! You can't just Move it! That'll leave a tape mark.
This is unacceptable! I'm sorry.
If you'll just let me No! Never mind.
I'll do it myself.
Thank you for shopping at Taylor's.
I'm sorry about that.
Uh, welcome to Taylor's complimentary gift wrap.
May I help you select a presentation? Why would he fire you? Because he caught me scheduling interviews for my adjuster jobs.
He was such an ass about it.
Ok.
Just try not to Maybe this isn't the end of the world.
No, I don't have an income, Bailey.
No savings.
Nothing.
Nothing but a 7-year-old who is actually looking forward to Christmas.
Ok, well, maybe now you have time to go on interviews for other jobs.
Nobody's hiring until after the holidays, and I need a paycheck while I'm looking.
Ok, look.
Maybe Maybe this is one of those Blessing-in-disguise things.
Oh, please.
No.
Think about it.
Yeah, it's gonna be tight for a couple of weeks, but now you have a chance to go look for a better job.
You don't get it, do you? This is not like getting kicked out of some class, ok? Or getting a "c" in sociology.
This is my life here! I know that, Annie.
That is exactly why I'm trying to help you figure out Yeah, well, you know what? You can't.
Ok? Because you don't even understand.
I mean, and I don't want to hear it, ok? Because the last time I listened to you, it got me into this mess in the first place! Wait a minute No, if it weren't for you pushing me to take that test, I would still have a job! Wait a second, Annie, that's not fair.
Just do me a favor, ok? Please, just go play with your friends and leave me alone.
Hey, you're just in time.
I've drastically reduced my entire inventory.
Great.
Wouldn't happen to have any coats, would you? You are in so much luck.
And is there any place to eat? Well, they got mad cow burgers down by the interstate.
It's about 2 hours away.
Everything else is closed, which nobody bothered to tell me when I bought this place.
Here, try that.
I have a feeling it's you.
What's that smell? It's nice.
Uh, the sea, probably, and pipe tobacco.
It was my uncle's.
He was a steward on the queen Mary or something.
I'm sorry, but we're kind of in a hurry, so, uh How much for the coat? Oh, uh Sold.
I'll make you a deal.
You buy the coat, you help me move all this junk inside, and you can be the first to try my new lamb stew.
The b&B isn't really taking off, so I'm trying to make a go of the restaurant.
Really? That's what I do.
Maybe I can give you some pointers.
Wait a minute.
Uh That's that's sweet, but We can't.
This trip is already out of control, Charlie.
Are you kidding me? This is like the universe speaking or something.
We're lost, cold, and hungry, and the answer just falls in our lap? Come on, how can we say no? All right.
But after that, we're going home.
So Come in? I'm Glenn.
Charlie And Kirsten.
Hi.
Hi.
Uh, let me just grab my wallet out of the truck.
Ok.
Kirsten, you got the keys? What did I tell you? This 'nog rocks! You made this, Sarah? Yeah, from scratch.
So, before I forget: Your ornament.
Ooh! Beautiful wrapping.
Uh-huh.
Yes.
That is very, very Professional.
Did you do that, or did you have some little elf do it for you? Oh No.
It, uh, came this way, actually, prewrapped, you know, at the store.
Ahh.
Hey, cool tree.
Let's go, um, look at the tree.
Ok, if you won't come to the party, then the party shall come to you.
Have some eggnog.
I hate eggnog.
Ok, well, some of your buddies from state are out there.
Nice guys, too.
I don't Who? Who's out there? I didn't catch their names, but those guys Ha ha! I don't know those guys.
You mean Oh, well, I just assumed that Nope.
No wonder they didn't bring an ornament.
Whoa! Ha ha! Bailey, your floor's not level.
Ha ha ha! God, I am such an idiot.
I can't imagine what I did with those keys.
Unless I dropped them outside.
Just Let it go for now.
Ok? We looked everywhere, and it's too dark now, so let's just Enjoy dinner.
You smell that? Go on.
Smell.
Wow.
That's amazing.
Actually, this whole place is amazing.
And it's all ours.
Hey, you guys Lamb is almost ready.
I promise.
Oh You know, you're welcome to stay here the night and just head back in the morning.
I've got 20 rooms sitting empty.
Oh, that's Thank you, but but we should probably Shouldn't we? I don't know.
Um Claudia said she's happy to watch Owen tonight, and we can pick up the armoire in the morning.
I mean We've come this far.
Unless You think Paul would mind.
No.
No, it's not that.
It's just What? It's Nothing.
It's nothing.
I'll go make up a room.
Uh We we kind of need 2.
Yeah.
We're We're not Oh, get out of here! You two? You just seem so No, no, we're We're just friends.
Good friends, but Just friends.
And besides, he snores.
Mmm It must be the nutmeg.
I love nutmeg.
Or maybe, you know what? Maybe it's the vanilla.
II love vanilla.
I'm thinking it's the rum.
I didn't put any rum in this.
No, but those guys did.
I love those guys! I always hated you.
Huh? Oh, yeah.
What a coincidence.
I always hated you, too.
I mean, let's be honest.
You got this whole "bad boy" thing going on "this is me, and I don't give a damn" thing that women always go for Makes me wanna puke.
Well, what about you, huh? You with your "smartest and thinks he's smartest" routine.
Major pain in the butt, Mr.
Harvard freakin' law.
It's Yale! All right? And I'm an English major.
Ooh, yeah, Mr.
Yale freakin' English.
You know what really baffles my ass? I'm the one who's killing myself.
And you, you already got everything you want.
You got your stupid little motorcycle shop, you're married to this perfect woman, and it's just Man, go figure.
Yeah, well, it's not all it's cracked up to be, all right? I've got overhead, I've got long hours, and I'm living in a shed.
Harvard's a piece of cake compared to the real world, pal.
Yale! Yale shmale, man! Don't come crying on my shoulder.
You're the one that's got it easy.
Oh, oh, you think you got it rough? Whoo-hoo.
I was valedictorian at Grant.
You know that? And then I go to Yale and, hello! All of a sudden I'm failing English lit.
English lit! It's like all of a sudden I'm stupid or something.
Oh, and the people there.
Oh, my god.
My roommate He's this thurston howell the turd wannabe.
First day he starts off by unpacking his collection of Brandy snifters.
And he's telling me all about his Polo scores, and I'm like, "whatever!" It sucks.
Ok? It blows! Ok? Ok?! Uh, ok, yeah.
No, man, whatever.
You yeah, you win.
Is there any more of this stuff? Oh, yeah.
Hey, the next one's on me, bro.
What? Nothing.
I was just Thinking about today.
That's all.
Yeah.
Can you believe it? Everything that could go wrong did.
Are you kidding me? Nothing went wrong.
This has been Everything went right.
I mean, one thing sort of led to another, and now we're In this incredible place.
And, yeah, there were All these setbacks, but it's like, this has been the best day I've had since they told me.
I don't know about you, but I'm really glad I got to do this with you.
It means a lot to me.
It's been Nice.
Really, really nice.
And you got a great coat.
And I got a great coat.
Thanks.
For taking me away.
Good night.
Sweet dreams.
Come here.
What? What? What are you doing? Nothing.
Nothing.
It's just, um, you know, you've never told me about your roommate.
At Yale.
What's he like? What are you uh He's, I don't know, he's pretty cool.
Why? Why are you asking me? "Pretty cool.
" Huh.
And what's cool about him exactly? Would that be the Brandy snifters or the Polo scores? Huh? I heard you talking to Griffin.
And, come on, I know you hate it there, so What kind of friends are we if you can't tell me the truth? Whoa, whoa, wait a minute.
Are you serious? Well, yes.
Yes, I don't understand why you've been going on and on and on about how great your life is if the whole time you've been I mean, why did you feel you had to lie to me? This is rich.
Especially coming from one of Santa's little elves.
What? How did you I am not the only one that's been lying here.
Oh, why don't you tell me about your great job over at Taylor's? That is not Wait a minute, Griffin told you? No.
I saw you.
So, good question, Julia.
What kind of friends are we? Excuse me.
Excuse me! I'm sorry.
We making too much noise, ma'am? Bailey.
Look Can we talk? Why? You not done yelling at me yet? No.
No.
I'm I'm sorry About that.
It's just I'm feeling a little out of control here.
Hey, hey, there you are! This thing is starting to make sense to me.
Not now, will, all right? I hope you don't mind my being honest here.
I've been trying to wrap my brain around the two of you.
I think I finally have an angle.
That's great, will.
Why don't you go stick your head in the freezer and sober up? Hang on, hang on.
It's like, when I got here, I'm looking at you guys, I'm thinking, "whoa.
I don't get it.
" Right? what, 10 years older.
And I'm thinking, "man, what's up with that?" Right? What's Bailey going through that he's into this older woman? And then it hits me.
I'm gonna hit you Maybe, maybe It's a maternal kind of thing.
You know, the whole Anne Bancroft-Dustin Hoffman-Mrs.
Robinson type thing that Hey! Just shut the hell up, all right?! God, will, what gives you the right to come back here and start psychoanalyzing everybody, huh? What? I thought we had a rapport going on.
Look, what goes on between me and Annie is none of your stupid business, ok? So just stop! Come on, Annie.
Annie! Annie?! Annie! Annie?! Annie! Oh, god.
Annie, you didn't.
I didn't.
But I want to, Bailey.
I am so close.
Do you mind? Ok.
Look, I know that this has been really rough on you Getting fired from your job and all God, Bailey, that's not I mean, yes, ok, it's a huge part of it.
It's not just that.
It's so much more than that.
Like what? Like what if he's right? Your friend will.
I mean, what if I am some dirty old woman, some some Mrs.
Robinson? What? Annie I'm 26.
I'm 26 years old, I just got fired from this crappy job, I have a child who's totally dependent on me, and I'm dating some College student.
Wh-what does that say about me, Bailey? I mean What kind of desperate person does that make me? I don't know, Annie.
What kind of person does it make me? Yeah You're older.
So what? You're older, but that It doesn't matter, Annie, because These last few years I've had to grow up pretty fast.
And I look at will, and it's like We don't even live in the same world anymore, you know? And after everything that I've been through, I have more in common with you than anybody I've ever known in my whole life.
You and me Make so much sense, Annie.
Because we understand each other.
So Don't throw that out just because some stupid friend of mine doesn't get it.
You know what? You're the oldest Actually I'm 19.
Are you speaking to me? Should I be? Look, Justin, I don't know how this whole stupid thing got so So out of hand.
But, if you tell me why you lied, I will, too.
I, uh I have some serious buyer's remorse about college.
Um, I made this big deal about going and how perfect my life was gonna be.
Only things kind of didn't turn out the way you thought they would.
Because, believe me, I get that.
You know, it's weird, but I needed to believe you.
I needed to, like, live vicariously through you or something.
It's really bad, huh? It's hell.
Huh.
What? I'm kind of glad.
Oh, thank you for the support.
No, no, because, I mean, I know it's totally selfish, but Now my life doesn't seem so bad.
Interesting.
But I kind of know what you mean.
Ok.
So tell me how it really is.
I wanna hear every single miserable detail.
All right.
Just as long as you promise to do the same.
Oh, I can beat you misery for misery.
Oh, yeah? All right, you're on.
Mm-hmm.
Uh, uh, new haven? It is the bleakest, coldest, most depressing place in the world.
Wow, that's good.
Try living in a shed.
Oh, yeah? Mm-hmm.
Ohh, this would be, like, so much easier if the room would stop spinning.
Thought it was just me.
Ohh.
Ooh.
Sorry.
You know, I'm gonna I think maybe I should Ice.
Oh, god.
Whoa, if I told you I know and give it to you in writing that I am a complete horse's ass, would it spare me the speech? No.
Not this time.
About all that stuff you said last night Look, I'm sorry, ok? The liquor just got a little verbose.
No.
The liquor just makes you say stuff you're already thinking, will.
I've been there, ok? But you know what I don't get? The last time you came home, you got all smug on me, and you called me a drunk.
And you were right.
I admit that.
But now you come home, and I'm sober, and I am really trying here, and it's like that's not good enough for you either.
You're all judgmental and nasty and and whatever.
What's up with that, will? Nothing.
God, I'm sorry.
Can can we please stop this? You're my friend, bay, and you're right.
You're sober, and that's fantastic.
And whatever works for you.
I'm sorry.
I'm really, really sorry.
Now, if you don't mind, I'm just gonna Lay down and die.
Yeah, well, you do that.
Did you really mean that? No.
I don't get it.
It's either one extreme or the other with him.
I just don't get it at all.
I just I can't believe I spaced like that.
It's ok, really.
No, Charlie, I swear.
I looked in my purse a hundred thousand times, and those keys were not there.
I told you, I found them in the little Little side pouch thingie.
It happens.
Yeah, well It's weird.
It's like a sign or something.
Yeah.
Kind of like that.
Ok.
They said it'd be right in front.
Oh, it's so beautiful.
It's gonna look so great in our Kirsten: Wow.
It didn't look like this when Kirsten: My cousins must've Hey.
No.
I'm sorry.
I just You gotta admit it.
Man, that is That is Butt-ugly is what it is.
Ohh! But I could refinish it for you.
Make it look as good as new.
Uhh! You could do that? Absolutely.
Of course I can.
Ohh Ok.
Then I guess we should load it up.
Yup.
And head for home.
Look, I made an angel.
Ohh! Hey That's beautiful, nat.
Kind of looks like your mom.
Can I hang it on the tree? Of course.
You know what? Put it right on the top.
Ok.
So First thing tomorrow morning, you file for unemployment.
You can do that since you got fired.
Right.
Ok.
And then We start circling ads in the paper for A real job.
And school's out for a couple of weeks, so I can take care of nat during the day so you can go on interviews and stuff.
So You'd do that for me? And I'm gonna help you out with Santa claus 'Cause that's, like That's important.
Thank you.
It's not gonna be easy, but You don't have to do it alone.
Ok? Look, I know what you're thinking, ok? And I understand if you're mad, but that is not why I felt I had to lie to Justin about stuff.
What are you talking about? Well, I know that you think that I lied because I'm ashamed of our relationship together or I'm unhappy with you or whatever, but that is so not it.
This has, like, nothing to do with you.
I know that.
It's just that he was all full of Yale and saying how great it is, and I couldn't exactly admit Julia, Julia, please.
You can stop, all right? I understand why you lied, all right? Completely.
You do? God, who wouldn't? I mean, things are miserable.
I mean, how many paper cuts did you get yesterday? I don't know, about a gazillion.
I've been working around the clock to try to keep our heads above water.
Charlie's sick.
Hell, we're living in a shed, for god's sake.
Stop calling it a shed.
Why wouldn't you want to lie about it? Griffin: Let's face it, life sucks right now.
Whoa Wow Well, who Ahh Shh, shh, shh.
You want to stop in tiburon? Get something to eat? I should probably just get back.
My treatment's pretty early tomorrow, so Want me to come with you? That'd be Yeah, that'd be great.
Huh.
Kind of hope there's traffic.

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