Comic Book Men s04e13 Episode Script
Sucka M.C.
If you became a superhero, you had to design your own costume, would you go full mask, or would you just wear the thing that just covers your eyes? Oof.
I mean, I feel like in real life, I'd want to go full mask most of the time.
What about you? For cool factor, I would want to go full mask.
See, I don't buy it out of you.
You're such a fame whore.
He'd wear no mask at all.
Yeah.
Yeah, right? There's no way you'd wear any sort of mask.
You'd want the grandeur and the applause and everything that goes with it.
On my costume, like, my full name would be emblazoned on there, yeah, so everybody knew that it was me.
My archenemy will never find my loved ones.
Kids, daddy wants a modicum of fame.
Don't you understand that your lives are worth that? They just got to be a little more careful.
Yeah.
Yeah? Hello and welcome to another episode of Comic Book Men, the only show that's faster than Barry Allen.
In bed.
I'm your host Kevin Smith.
- Bryan Johnson.
- Walt Flanagan.
- Mike Zapcic.
- Ming Chen.
Okay, any new product come through the doors this week? Last week, the stash cast its net in hopes of acquiring one of the last affordable Marvel silver age number ones ever.
All right, have a wonderful day.
- You too.
- Thanks.
- Hey, guys, how you doing? - How are you? I got something real cool that I was curious if you'd be interested in.
I have a samaritan number 1 from 1967.
Ooh, Namor, the prince of the Marvel universe.
Prince Namor, the Submariner.
I mean, created in the '40s.
Fought against the Nazis.
Was he taking down u-boats and stuff? - Yeah, he's picking them up - Oh, yeah.
Crushing them under his armpit, yeah.
Then when they reintroduced him, he was almost a villain, I guess 'cause he's actually more interested in his own kingdom than surface dwellers.
You know, he has walked that tightrope between good guy and villain in the Marvel universe like no other character.
They never knew what to do with Prince Namor and still don't to this day.
Yeah, he started with the Fantastic Four as the bad guy, then had his you know, got his own series, turned into the good guy, He looks like a Spock in Speedos.
But why do you think the Submariner lags far, far behind in the rest of the Marvel pantheon? I mean, that's an age-old question that I think befuddles Marvel.
Like, they've done at least 15 to 20 different costumes changing on Namor.
Even at the height of Marvel's mutant mania of the '90s, they even went on to, like, emblazon his then current series as "Marvel's first mutant.
" - Mm-hmm.
- Like, that they were trying anything to sell really, they were trying to be like, "he could be an X-Men, kids.
"You want to try this out, "'cause the man lives in the ocean? Nah? We understand.
" I actually got this in 1975 at my first comic convention at the commodore hotel in New York.
Oh, yeah? And it's got a little fun surprise inside.
- Oh, can we open it up? - Yes, please, please.
It's Anthrax.
No, not with me in the room, please.
Oh, wow.
Is that John Romita? John Romita, yeah.
- Roy Thomas.
- Roy Thomas.
- I'm a big Don Perlin fan.
- Yeah.
I'm a big fan of his Werewolf by Night run.
Some of the names, I'll be honest like, I think that's Stan Goldman.
I thought it was Stan Lee at first, but then I realized that's not the way he - Big difference.
- Big diff So you actually went up and got these signatures yourself, or you bought them like this? I bought the book like this, so I did not - Oh, okay.
- Yeah.
It's one of those books, though, that, like, - is still affordable.
- Yeah.
You know, a number 1 Marvel comic in the Silver Age, I mean, you can't touch them nowadays, you know, under a G.
So why are you looking to sell it? Well, it's the first comic that I bought, and I've got a large collection that I need to start to let go, so I figured, what if I could get rid of this one? Then I could start moving the 25 long boxes and 25 of him bothering you more.
that I have in my house that my wife's ready to kill me with.
May be worth taking a risk on that they're authentic signatures if the price is right.
I mean, what are you looking to get for it? I was thinking about 100 bucks.
I mean, it's not out it's not out of the ballpark.
Would you take 60 for it? Mm.
That's a little too low.
What about 85? How about 75? You've got my wife on your side.
I think she'll be happy if I don't come home with it, so oh, she got a little sue storm in her, huh? Oh, a lot more than that.
I'd go more with Ben grimm the way she punches, but It's clobbering time? But I'll take it.
So 75 it is? - That works.
- All right, man.
Awesome.
Thank you very much.
Awesome, guys.
Thank you very much.
- Have a good one.
- Take care.
- What's happening? - Are you Darryl Mcdaniels? Yeah, yeah, DMC in the place to be.
I heard this is the place to be, man.
- Yo, this DMC of run-DMC.
- I've arrived.
Hey, man, how you doing? How you doing? What's happening? - What can we do for you today? - What's going on? Nothing, man.
I've come to check out the mecca, man.
This is the place to be.
I heard I had to come here, man.
- Hey, hold on, hold on.
- The Secret Stash.
Are you Darryl Mcdaniels? Yeah, yeah, DMC in the place to be.
I heard this is the place to be, man.
Yo, this is DMC of run-DMC.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, most people don't know me 'cause I ain't got the glasses on.
This is crazy.
I've arrived.
I didn't know you were into comics.
I am comics, man.
I am comic books.
Comic books is my whole existence.
It empowers me.
Comic books made me who I am today.
There would be no run-DMC if it wasn't for comic books.
Really? In our store? Aw.
I love DMC.
I love run-DMC in general.
But I love DMC, man.
You're talking about two cats who, along with jam master Jay, had a dream.
Basically they wanted to rap, and nobody was doing that at that point, at least not too many people.
They brought rap to the mainstream, man.
Run-DMC, first ever rap artist to cross over with Aerosmith with walk this way.
They were the bridge between cultures, and they became the kings of rock, as they call themselves.
My whole existence as a kid was Marvel Comics.
Captain America, the Hulk, Spider-Man, the Avengers.
Sal Buscema defined my whole childhood.
So me and my brother, we had this big, huge collection of comic books.
Almost every issue of Marvel, right? And I can never forget this day.
My brother comes in the room.
He was three years older than me.
And he says, "Darryl, "we need to get some turntables and a mixer and some records.
" And just by the look on his face, I saw he was about to say it, and I was like, "no, don't say it.
" And he says, "we have to do a comic book sale "and sell some of our comic books to get some turntables.
" That's exactly what I did to make clerks.
I sold my comics to make to follow my passion, my art.
But I never let go of them, even though I sold them.
You know, obviously, comics infiltrated my heart and soul.
Sounds like the same thing for him.
Definitely.
I mean, he is ready to conquer the comics world like he did the music world.
I'm gonna do a celebration and a tribute to comic book culture.
So here I am today.
This is for you.
This is for you.
This is for you.
But this right here is issue 1 of the DMC comic book with the cover drawn by the one and only Sal Buscema.
There would be no DMC if it wasn't for Captain America, the Hulk, Spider-Man, and Iron Man.
And to let y'all know how deep it goes is, when run, "d, I'm putting you in my group, we're gonna make this record," I didn't want to get up in front of y'all and start rhyming.
I didn't want to get up onstage in front of thousands I was a shy little catholic school kid, geeky, nerd dude.
But what gave me my confidence? Every time I would hear a beat, I would go, "hmm, what would the Hulk do? Crash through walls, come through floors, bust through ceilings and knock you know what, comic books gave me the confidence to get up onstage and rap.
Check this out.
'Cause they said, "come up with a name for your imprint.
" - "Darryl makes comics.
" - DMC.
It looks spectacular.
I mean, we would be honored and proud to carry DMC comics here at the Stash.
Thank you.
I'd be even prouder to hear somebody taken him on in a battle.
A self-described mc.
Who's that? Who's the mc? Yeah, who are you talking about? Shockingly, he's one of these guys who believes he can rap.
- Really? - Yeah.
Well, I mean, I've dabbled, but, I mean, I'm not you know, I'm not a legend like you are.
- Oh, no? Really? - No.
You want to go round for round? - Pfft! - I think you should.
- Come on.
- You said I mean, what's the worst thing that could happen? I'm not kidding around.
He said he wants to be a professional rapper.
- Really? - That was his dream.
All right, you know, I've dabbled in spitting a few rhymes.
Oh.
Look, way two different things.
I agree.
I agree.
But these guys start egging me on, though.
And that's living room rapping.
You don't take it to the king of rock himself.
Well, he didn't take it to him.
We sort of, like, nudged him towards it.
I'll tell you what.
Here's what we do.
I got to run an errand real quick.
Here's what we'll do.
I'll come back.
We'll go verse for verse.
If you beat me, I'll put you on a record.
Got a couple of what if comics I think maybe you'd be interested in.
Oh, man, loved what ifs.
Mm.
I got a special place in my heart for the what ifs.
Check this out all throughout the book, we wanted to drop little easter eggs.
Could y'all tell me what this is from? Oh, I recognize that.
You recognize that, Mike? - Iron Man.
- Exactly, so hold on.
I'm gonna put you on the spot and go deeper.
Let me see if this is the real mecca.
Check this out.
Akira.
Oh, that's good.
Oh, wow.
- Incredible Hulk.
- Web of Spider-Man.
Oh, wow okay, okay.
How about this one? Black Panther, Jungle Tales.
Dark Knight Returns.
Okay, okay, okay.
All right, here we go.
Wolverine, X-Men 211, I believe.
- John Romita, Jr.
- Yeah, I'm pretty sure.
And this one is Daredevil, isn't it? Oh, man, I ain't getting over on you.
So y'all official.
You know, I come in here like I'm all official, trying to test your but that's great, man.
How you doing? - How's it going, guys? - What's going on? I got a couple of what if comics I think maybe you'd be interested in.
- What if? - What if.
Oh, my goodness, you know what we were just doing right now? A "what if.
" Oh, well, I have what if the Hulk had killed Wolverine? What if Wolverine had killed the Hulk? And what if Wolverine was lord of the vampires? Mm, do you remember what ifs, Mike? Oh, man, loved what ifs.
These were real popular back in the day.
But I think what if has kind of, you know, gone the way of the dinosaur.
Really, you don't hear much about it.
But I got a special place in my heart for the what ifs.
What if was Marvel's fantasy book.
You know, battling it out with our imaginations, asking us the important questions.
What if Wolverine had killed the Hulk? What if the Hulk had Bruce Banner's brain? Oh.
I mean, it was just a great series.
But generally, people were like, "well, that's that's not a real comic.
That's what if," which is ironic, 'cause the stuff that they were like, "this is a real comic where the Hulk didn't get killed by Wolverine," it's like, "no, that's fake too.
" One of my favorite ones, which actually came to pass, though, was, what if Spider-Man joined the Fantastic Four? Did you have a favorite what if issue? I liked the what if the Vision had destroyed the Avengers? That's one of my all-time favorites.
What was your favorite what if? - I never read one.
- Oh, you never - You were never into these? - I never read one, no.
- No.
Were they all this serious? - Oh, yeah.
Where it's like, "what if so-and-so killed so-and-so?" Think about it.
Comics can go anywhere.
The only thing they can't do is really kill their characters.
So the only way you can really do it, the only way you can tell that story, is in a what if.
Come on, man.
I'd be like, "what if I cared about any of this?" You're looking to sell these today? - Yes.
- How come? Well, I am looking to raise money to get a video game console for a local community center, so the kids can have something to do and not be out in the street, getting into who knows what kind of trouble.
So keep them busy, give them something to do, - All right.
- You know? I mean, did you look up any of the prices before you got here today? 'Cause you're probably not looking at like, at a Playstation 4 - or an Xbox.
- Definitely not.
You're probably looking at a like, at a pong.
- 2600? - 2600, yeah.
Those little tiger handhelds.
Yeah.
I mean, what were you looking to get today? Well, I was hoping for at least 50.
- Wow.
- Yeah.
Um I don't think I could go that high for these issues.
I mean, it's a great cause, and because it is a good cause, um I could do 25.
You wouldn't go 30? I could do 28.
That's it.
- Oof.
- 28.
All right, sounds good.
Sounds good.
- 28? - 28 sounds good.
Whatever helps, whatever helps.
$28, man.
- All right.
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
All right, guys.
- Good luck.
You know what? They should tap us to be the writers of what if, right? That's all we do all day, like you said.
Marvel comes to you.
The editor says, "Ming, what do you got for me? First issue, what if relaunch.
" Me and Mike on a deserted island.
Yo, yo, yo, yo.
All right, y'all.
Microphone check, one, two.
Let's do this.
First rap battle the stash has ever had.
Yes.
How do you get to rap battle with DMC? Like, what world is this possible? Why you? I have no idea how this happened.
Well, you can't back out, right? No, I can't back out, but I'm sitting here I was like, is this really happening? It's just it's so crazy to me that all those years I've been listening to run-DMC, and whenever they talk about a sucker mc, like, it's you.
You are who they've been singing about.
Like, you would think MC meant Ming Chen.
All right, let's do this the right way.
Can somebody do the intro? On this side, you have the pioneer of an entire genre, one of the most legendary hip-hop groups of all time, if not the all-time, run-DMC.
Darryl "DMC" Mcdaniels, straight out of Hollis.
And straight out of his condo over in Shrewsbury, because his wife let him leave the house today, Ming Chen.
I'm ready when you are, man.
I had this memorized, but I want to get it smooth, so All right, whatever it takes for you to get the verse out.
All right, all right, here we go.
Yo, what up, DMC? I give your rhymes props Gonna take more than that to sell your book in our shop - Is your comic story tight? - Yes.
Or will fanboys flee? Do you have what it takes to be the next Stan Lee? - Yes.
- Think rap critics tough? Well, you haven't met my crew You ain't in Hollis, queens, you in the stash now, foo' This my man flanny flan He been reading all his life But peeps are really shocked that he really has a wife This my man Mike Z He's the comics knowledge guy I see.
Just please please make sure That your book don't make him cry And my man biggie Bry He's the fourth fat boy Scream, "all you can eat" And he'll always be your boy That just leaves me To be down with the king But to sell your four colors Got to be down with the Ming Ah.
And so now we out Me and my four-man crew And I hand over the mic, and I throw it back to you - All right.
- Yeah, yeah? - Okay.
- All right? That was that was I crapped my pants.
Who is the best? That's what they are debatin' It's me, DMC And beatin' your punk ass ain't a mother thing I got to be honest with you, and I even want to go on the record now.
I have never had more respect for you than that moment when you stepped up to the plate and you went nose-to-nose with DMC.
And you I mean, that took a lot of cojones, yo.
I'm sorry.
I noticed a pig going flying by.
First thing I want to say about all of these wannabe rappers that exist in the world today, you know, I don't really waste my time battling them 'cause they're a waste of my Precious energy.
So instead of just going at you, I'm go about go ahead at all of you who think you can come at the king.
Just want to ask you this.
Who is the best? That's what they are debatin' While they are beef in' I am beatin' down Satan Went to the gates of hell And I kicked the gates in Said he was coming to see me I was standing there waiting I waited 40 days And for 40 nights I killed 40 mcs and I rocked 40 mics Punk-ass Satan, he never showed up So I shut down hell and I closed the gates up All the demons were screamin' DMC must die 'Cause I raise hell and I'm still on the rise High in the sky, where the angels all fly For heavy D, JMJ, and left eye It's me, DMC it's easy being king And beatin' your punk ass ain't a mother thing All right.
All right.
All right, that was good.
Give me that chain.
I think you earned it.
I think you earned it.
Maybe I lost, but at least I lost to the best.
You stood up.
You come correct, as they say.
And he respects you now, I bet.
Ooh.
I don't know.
Man, like, this sounds like a day that I actually missed.
Generally speaking, the adventures that happen around here, I'm happy to hear you guys tell me about.
But this sounds like a day I actually would have liked to have been there, man.
Like, meeting DMC is a cool thing.
Well, hold on.
I know what a big run-DMC fan you are.
I felt really bad that you weren't there that day, so planned a little surprise for you, so No.
- Stepping up to the mic - No! - The king of rock - No! Mr.
DMC himself, Darryl Mcdaniels.
No! Oh, my lord.
How are you, man? Oh, lord.
Oh! 'Cause I know you're the only one that cared enough to bring him back.
Sir.
Hey, what's up, Kev? Sir, you are absolutely, have been for 30 years, one of my biggest heroes.
And one of the things I loved so much about run-DMC, still do to this day, is the declarative "we know who we are.
" At age 14, that was so important to hear somebody be like, "I'm the king of rock, there is none higher.
" And you would sit there and be like, "why can they say that?" And by the end of the song, you believed them.
And it was just that kind of, like, self-assurance, man.
Like, that kind of self-esteem, like, translated over to me.
And by the time I was ready to make clerks, it was people like you who did it first.
So, like, you are absolutely one of my biggest heroes.
Well, thank you, man.
I mean, wow.
You know, truth be told, we didn't want to be celebrities to the audience.
I think that's the you know, people always say, "run-DMC, they're pioneers, they're legends," we this and that.
I think one of the most important things that we did, when you saw run, d, and Jay, you saw yourself.
Yes.
When we came into show business, we said, "why do we got to change who we are just to be onstage or be in front of the camera?" So when we stepped in front of the world, kids like you, white, black, Puerto Rican, Asian, didn't see something that they could not be.
Yes.
And they saw themselves.
Whoa.
All right, man, so I understand the king of rock was forced into some sort of rap battle with the king of not.
Yeah, yeah.
Well, yeah.
We went verse for verse, line for line.
All I got to say to you is this: Practice.
Oh! That's all the time we got.
We got to hip-op out of here, man.
For Comic Book Men, I'm your host Kevin Smith.
- Bryan Johnson.
- Walt Flanagan.
Darryl Mcdaniel.
- Mike Zapcic.
- Ming Chen.
Remember kids, it's like that, yo.
And that's the way it is!
I mean, I feel like in real life, I'd want to go full mask most of the time.
What about you? For cool factor, I would want to go full mask.
See, I don't buy it out of you.
You're such a fame whore.
He'd wear no mask at all.
Yeah.
Yeah, right? There's no way you'd wear any sort of mask.
You'd want the grandeur and the applause and everything that goes with it.
On my costume, like, my full name would be emblazoned on there, yeah, so everybody knew that it was me.
My archenemy will never find my loved ones.
Kids, daddy wants a modicum of fame.
Don't you understand that your lives are worth that? They just got to be a little more careful.
Yeah.
Yeah? Hello and welcome to another episode of Comic Book Men, the only show that's faster than Barry Allen.
In bed.
I'm your host Kevin Smith.
- Bryan Johnson.
- Walt Flanagan.
- Mike Zapcic.
- Ming Chen.
Okay, any new product come through the doors this week? Last week, the stash cast its net in hopes of acquiring one of the last affordable Marvel silver age number ones ever.
All right, have a wonderful day.
- You too.
- Thanks.
- Hey, guys, how you doing? - How are you? I got something real cool that I was curious if you'd be interested in.
I have a samaritan number 1 from 1967.
Ooh, Namor, the prince of the Marvel universe.
Prince Namor, the Submariner.
I mean, created in the '40s.
Fought against the Nazis.
Was he taking down u-boats and stuff? - Yeah, he's picking them up - Oh, yeah.
Crushing them under his armpit, yeah.
Then when they reintroduced him, he was almost a villain, I guess 'cause he's actually more interested in his own kingdom than surface dwellers.
You know, he has walked that tightrope between good guy and villain in the Marvel universe like no other character.
They never knew what to do with Prince Namor and still don't to this day.
Yeah, he started with the Fantastic Four as the bad guy, then had his you know, got his own series, turned into the good guy, He looks like a Spock in Speedos.
But why do you think the Submariner lags far, far behind in the rest of the Marvel pantheon? I mean, that's an age-old question that I think befuddles Marvel.
Like, they've done at least 15 to 20 different costumes changing on Namor.
Even at the height of Marvel's mutant mania of the '90s, they even went on to, like, emblazon his then current series as "Marvel's first mutant.
" - Mm-hmm.
- Like, that they were trying anything to sell really, they were trying to be like, "he could be an X-Men, kids.
"You want to try this out, "'cause the man lives in the ocean? Nah? We understand.
" I actually got this in 1975 at my first comic convention at the commodore hotel in New York.
Oh, yeah? And it's got a little fun surprise inside.
- Oh, can we open it up? - Yes, please, please.
It's Anthrax.
No, not with me in the room, please.
Oh, wow.
Is that John Romita? John Romita, yeah.
- Roy Thomas.
- Roy Thomas.
- I'm a big Don Perlin fan.
- Yeah.
I'm a big fan of his Werewolf by Night run.
Some of the names, I'll be honest like, I think that's Stan Goldman.
I thought it was Stan Lee at first, but then I realized that's not the way he - Big difference.
- Big diff So you actually went up and got these signatures yourself, or you bought them like this? I bought the book like this, so I did not - Oh, okay.
- Yeah.
It's one of those books, though, that, like, - is still affordable.
- Yeah.
You know, a number 1 Marvel comic in the Silver Age, I mean, you can't touch them nowadays, you know, under a G.
So why are you looking to sell it? Well, it's the first comic that I bought, and I've got a large collection that I need to start to let go, so I figured, what if I could get rid of this one? Then I could start moving the 25 long boxes and 25 of him bothering you more.
that I have in my house that my wife's ready to kill me with.
May be worth taking a risk on that they're authentic signatures if the price is right.
I mean, what are you looking to get for it? I was thinking about 100 bucks.
I mean, it's not out it's not out of the ballpark.
Would you take 60 for it? Mm.
That's a little too low.
What about 85? How about 75? You've got my wife on your side.
I think she'll be happy if I don't come home with it, so oh, she got a little sue storm in her, huh? Oh, a lot more than that.
I'd go more with Ben grimm the way she punches, but It's clobbering time? But I'll take it.
So 75 it is? - That works.
- All right, man.
Awesome.
Thank you very much.
Awesome, guys.
Thank you very much.
- Have a good one.
- Take care.
- What's happening? - Are you Darryl Mcdaniels? Yeah, yeah, DMC in the place to be.
I heard this is the place to be, man.
- Yo, this DMC of run-DMC.
- I've arrived.
Hey, man, how you doing? How you doing? What's happening? - What can we do for you today? - What's going on? Nothing, man.
I've come to check out the mecca, man.
This is the place to be.
I heard I had to come here, man.
- Hey, hold on, hold on.
- The Secret Stash.
Are you Darryl Mcdaniels? Yeah, yeah, DMC in the place to be.
I heard this is the place to be, man.
Yo, this is DMC of run-DMC.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, most people don't know me 'cause I ain't got the glasses on.
This is crazy.
I've arrived.
I didn't know you were into comics.
I am comics, man.
I am comic books.
Comic books is my whole existence.
It empowers me.
Comic books made me who I am today.
There would be no run-DMC if it wasn't for comic books.
Really? In our store? Aw.
I love DMC.
I love run-DMC in general.
But I love DMC, man.
You're talking about two cats who, along with jam master Jay, had a dream.
Basically they wanted to rap, and nobody was doing that at that point, at least not too many people.
They brought rap to the mainstream, man.
Run-DMC, first ever rap artist to cross over with Aerosmith with walk this way.
They were the bridge between cultures, and they became the kings of rock, as they call themselves.
My whole existence as a kid was Marvel Comics.
Captain America, the Hulk, Spider-Man, the Avengers.
Sal Buscema defined my whole childhood.
So me and my brother, we had this big, huge collection of comic books.
Almost every issue of Marvel, right? And I can never forget this day.
My brother comes in the room.
He was three years older than me.
And he says, "Darryl, "we need to get some turntables and a mixer and some records.
" And just by the look on his face, I saw he was about to say it, and I was like, "no, don't say it.
" And he says, "we have to do a comic book sale "and sell some of our comic books to get some turntables.
" That's exactly what I did to make clerks.
I sold my comics to make to follow my passion, my art.
But I never let go of them, even though I sold them.
You know, obviously, comics infiltrated my heart and soul.
Sounds like the same thing for him.
Definitely.
I mean, he is ready to conquer the comics world like he did the music world.
I'm gonna do a celebration and a tribute to comic book culture.
So here I am today.
This is for you.
This is for you.
This is for you.
But this right here is issue 1 of the DMC comic book with the cover drawn by the one and only Sal Buscema.
There would be no DMC if it wasn't for Captain America, the Hulk, Spider-Man, and Iron Man.
And to let y'all know how deep it goes is, when run, "d, I'm putting you in my group, we're gonna make this record," I didn't want to get up in front of y'all and start rhyming.
I didn't want to get up onstage in front of thousands I was a shy little catholic school kid, geeky, nerd dude.
But what gave me my confidence? Every time I would hear a beat, I would go, "hmm, what would the Hulk do? Crash through walls, come through floors, bust through ceilings and knock you know what, comic books gave me the confidence to get up onstage and rap.
Check this out.
'Cause they said, "come up with a name for your imprint.
" - "Darryl makes comics.
" - DMC.
It looks spectacular.
I mean, we would be honored and proud to carry DMC comics here at the Stash.
Thank you.
I'd be even prouder to hear somebody taken him on in a battle.
A self-described mc.
Who's that? Who's the mc? Yeah, who are you talking about? Shockingly, he's one of these guys who believes he can rap.
- Really? - Yeah.
Well, I mean, I've dabbled, but, I mean, I'm not you know, I'm not a legend like you are.
- Oh, no? Really? - No.
You want to go round for round? - Pfft! - I think you should.
- Come on.
- You said I mean, what's the worst thing that could happen? I'm not kidding around.
He said he wants to be a professional rapper.
- Really? - That was his dream.
All right, you know, I've dabbled in spitting a few rhymes.
Oh.
Look, way two different things.
I agree.
I agree.
But these guys start egging me on, though.
And that's living room rapping.
You don't take it to the king of rock himself.
Well, he didn't take it to him.
We sort of, like, nudged him towards it.
I'll tell you what.
Here's what we do.
I got to run an errand real quick.
Here's what we'll do.
I'll come back.
We'll go verse for verse.
If you beat me, I'll put you on a record.
Got a couple of what if comics I think maybe you'd be interested in.
Oh, man, loved what ifs.
Mm.
I got a special place in my heart for the what ifs.
Check this out all throughout the book, we wanted to drop little easter eggs.
Could y'all tell me what this is from? Oh, I recognize that.
You recognize that, Mike? - Iron Man.
- Exactly, so hold on.
I'm gonna put you on the spot and go deeper.
Let me see if this is the real mecca.
Check this out.
Akira.
Oh, that's good.
Oh, wow.
- Incredible Hulk.
- Web of Spider-Man.
Oh, wow okay, okay.
How about this one? Black Panther, Jungle Tales.
Dark Knight Returns.
Okay, okay, okay.
All right, here we go.
Wolverine, X-Men 211, I believe.
- John Romita, Jr.
- Yeah, I'm pretty sure.
And this one is Daredevil, isn't it? Oh, man, I ain't getting over on you.
So y'all official.
You know, I come in here like I'm all official, trying to test your but that's great, man.
How you doing? - How's it going, guys? - What's going on? I got a couple of what if comics I think maybe you'd be interested in.
- What if? - What if.
Oh, my goodness, you know what we were just doing right now? A "what if.
" Oh, well, I have what if the Hulk had killed Wolverine? What if Wolverine had killed the Hulk? And what if Wolverine was lord of the vampires? Mm, do you remember what ifs, Mike? Oh, man, loved what ifs.
These were real popular back in the day.
But I think what if has kind of, you know, gone the way of the dinosaur.
Really, you don't hear much about it.
But I got a special place in my heart for the what ifs.
What if was Marvel's fantasy book.
You know, battling it out with our imaginations, asking us the important questions.
What if Wolverine had killed the Hulk? What if the Hulk had Bruce Banner's brain? Oh.
I mean, it was just a great series.
But generally, people were like, "well, that's that's not a real comic.
That's what if," which is ironic, 'cause the stuff that they were like, "this is a real comic where the Hulk didn't get killed by Wolverine," it's like, "no, that's fake too.
" One of my favorite ones, which actually came to pass, though, was, what if Spider-Man joined the Fantastic Four? Did you have a favorite what if issue? I liked the what if the Vision had destroyed the Avengers? That's one of my all-time favorites.
What was your favorite what if? - I never read one.
- Oh, you never - You were never into these? - I never read one, no.
- No.
Were they all this serious? - Oh, yeah.
Where it's like, "what if so-and-so killed so-and-so?" Think about it.
Comics can go anywhere.
The only thing they can't do is really kill their characters.
So the only way you can really do it, the only way you can tell that story, is in a what if.
Come on, man.
I'd be like, "what if I cared about any of this?" You're looking to sell these today? - Yes.
- How come? Well, I am looking to raise money to get a video game console for a local community center, so the kids can have something to do and not be out in the street, getting into who knows what kind of trouble.
So keep them busy, give them something to do, - All right.
- You know? I mean, did you look up any of the prices before you got here today? 'Cause you're probably not looking at like, at a Playstation 4 - or an Xbox.
- Definitely not.
You're probably looking at a like, at a pong.
- 2600? - 2600, yeah.
Those little tiger handhelds.
Yeah.
I mean, what were you looking to get today? Well, I was hoping for at least 50.
- Wow.
- Yeah.
Um I don't think I could go that high for these issues.
I mean, it's a great cause, and because it is a good cause, um I could do 25.
You wouldn't go 30? I could do 28.
That's it.
- Oof.
- 28.
All right, sounds good.
Sounds good.
- 28? - 28 sounds good.
Whatever helps, whatever helps.
$28, man.
- All right.
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
All right, guys.
- Good luck.
You know what? They should tap us to be the writers of what if, right? That's all we do all day, like you said.
Marvel comes to you.
The editor says, "Ming, what do you got for me? First issue, what if relaunch.
" Me and Mike on a deserted island.
Yo, yo, yo, yo.
All right, y'all.
Microphone check, one, two.
Let's do this.
First rap battle the stash has ever had.
Yes.
How do you get to rap battle with DMC? Like, what world is this possible? Why you? I have no idea how this happened.
Well, you can't back out, right? No, I can't back out, but I'm sitting here I was like, is this really happening? It's just it's so crazy to me that all those years I've been listening to run-DMC, and whenever they talk about a sucker mc, like, it's you.
You are who they've been singing about.
Like, you would think MC meant Ming Chen.
All right, let's do this the right way.
Can somebody do the intro? On this side, you have the pioneer of an entire genre, one of the most legendary hip-hop groups of all time, if not the all-time, run-DMC.
Darryl "DMC" Mcdaniels, straight out of Hollis.
And straight out of his condo over in Shrewsbury, because his wife let him leave the house today, Ming Chen.
I'm ready when you are, man.
I had this memorized, but I want to get it smooth, so All right, whatever it takes for you to get the verse out.
All right, all right, here we go.
Yo, what up, DMC? I give your rhymes props Gonna take more than that to sell your book in our shop - Is your comic story tight? - Yes.
Or will fanboys flee? Do you have what it takes to be the next Stan Lee? - Yes.
- Think rap critics tough? Well, you haven't met my crew You ain't in Hollis, queens, you in the stash now, foo' This my man flanny flan He been reading all his life But peeps are really shocked that he really has a wife This my man Mike Z He's the comics knowledge guy I see.
Just please please make sure That your book don't make him cry And my man biggie Bry He's the fourth fat boy Scream, "all you can eat" And he'll always be your boy That just leaves me To be down with the king But to sell your four colors Got to be down with the Ming Ah.
And so now we out Me and my four-man crew And I hand over the mic, and I throw it back to you - All right.
- Yeah, yeah? - Okay.
- All right? That was that was I crapped my pants.
Who is the best? That's what they are debatin' It's me, DMC And beatin' your punk ass ain't a mother thing I got to be honest with you, and I even want to go on the record now.
I have never had more respect for you than that moment when you stepped up to the plate and you went nose-to-nose with DMC.
And you I mean, that took a lot of cojones, yo.
I'm sorry.
I noticed a pig going flying by.
First thing I want to say about all of these wannabe rappers that exist in the world today, you know, I don't really waste my time battling them 'cause they're a waste of my Precious energy.
So instead of just going at you, I'm go about go ahead at all of you who think you can come at the king.
Just want to ask you this.
Who is the best? That's what they are debatin' While they are beef in' I am beatin' down Satan Went to the gates of hell And I kicked the gates in Said he was coming to see me I was standing there waiting I waited 40 days And for 40 nights I killed 40 mcs and I rocked 40 mics Punk-ass Satan, he never showed up So I shut down hell and I closed the gates up All the demons were screamin' DMC must die 'Cause I raise hell and I'm still on the rise High in the sky, where the angels all fly For heavy D, JMJ, and left eye It's me, DMC it's easy being king And beatin' your punk ass ain't a mother thing All right.
All right.
All right, that was good.
Give me that chain.
I think you earned it.
I think you earned it.
Maybe I lost, but at least I lost to the best.
You stood up.
You come correct, as they say.
And he respects you now, I bet.
Ooh.
I don't know.
Man, like, this sounds like a day that I actually missed.
Generally speaking, the adventures that happen around here, I'm happy to hear you guys tell me about.
But this sounds like a day I actually would have liked to have been there, man.
Like, meeting DMC is a cool thing.
Well, hold on.
I know what a big run-DMC fan you are.
I felt really bad that you weren't there that day, so planned a little surprise for you, so No.
- Stepping up to the mic - No! - The king of rock - No! Mr.
DMC himself, Darryl Mcdaniels.
No! Oh, my lord.
How are you, man? Oh, lord.
Oh! 'Cause I know you're the only one that cared enough to bring him back.
Sir.
Hey, what's up, Kev? Sir, you are absolutely, have been for 30 years, one of my biggest heroes.
And one of the things I loved so much about run-DMC, still do to this day, is the declarative "we know who we are.
" At age 14, that was so important to hear somebody be like, "I'm the king of rock, there is none higher.
" And you would sit there and be like, "why can they say that?" And by the end of the song, you believed them.
And it was just that kind of, like, self-assurance, man.
Like, that kind of self-esteem, like, translated over to me.
And by the time I was ready to make clerks, it was people like you who did it first.
So, like, you are absolutely one of my biggest heroes.
Well, thank you, man.
I mean, wow.
You know, truth be told, we didn't want to be celebrities to the audience.
I think that's the you know, people always say, "run-DMC, they're pioneers, they're legends," we this and that.
I think one of the most important things that we did, when you saw run, d, and Jay, you saw yourself.
Yes.
When we came into show business, we said, "why do we got to change who we are just to be onstage or be in front of the camera?" So when we stepped in front of the world, kids like you, white, black, Puerto Rican, Asian, didn't see something that they could not be.
Yes.
And they saw themselves.
Whoa.
All right, man, so I understand the king of rock was forced into some sort of rap battle with the king of not.
Yeah, yeah.
Well, yeah.
We went verse for verse, line for line.
All I got to say to you is this: Practice.
Oh! That's all the time we got.
We got to hip-op out of here, man.
For Comic Book Men, I'm your host Kevin Smith.
- Bryan Johnson.
- Walt Flanagan.
Darryl Mcdaniel.
- Mike Zapcic.
- Ming Chen.
Remember kids, it's like that, yo.
And that's the way it is!