Phineas and Ferb s04e13 Episode Script

I think this might be the hottest day on record.
Wait.
Yep.
Hi, guys.
Hey, Baljeet! How was physics camp? Positively remedial.
How much more basic can you get than the surface tension of water droplets? Surfer tension? What's that? Surface tension is the property which allows molecules of water on its surface to form a sort of stretchy skin, which allows it to retain its shape and durability at a small size.
Cool! Ferb, I know what we're gonna do today! Not me.
Really? And what are you doing today? With the hurly-burly of my busy social calendar, I often forget to have quality time with my pet goldfish, Biff.
So, I shall smell you later.
Wow.
"Smell you later" sounds a lot more formal when you bow.
Well, Ferb, I know what the rest of us are gonna do today.
Speaking of pets, where's Perry? Sorry I can't be there, Agent P, but I'm stuck on jury duty.
You'll be getting your mission today from Director Dipthong from accounting.
Good luck.
Uh No— No! No, Your Honor, I'm— I'm not speaking on a mobile device.
I'm— I'm talking to a wart on my hand.
I'm talking to a wart on my hand.
Go away, wart! Go away! Hello, Agent P.
It's me, Director Dipthong, from accounting.
Dr.
Doofenshmirtz has been buying an exorbitant amount of negative ion generators and negative power cable and I'm positive that it can't be good.
Yeah.
Uh, so go find out what Doofenshmirtz is up to and put a stop to it.
Descending Dipthong! What are you doing? It's my signature sign-off.
What do you think? Descending Dipthong.
I'd stick with accounting.
Can you believe how hot it is today, Jeremy? Even my dollies are sweating! Not that I play with dolls.
I just happen to have a couple on my shelf next to my unicorn.
Heh.
Cool.
So, what do you wanna do today? I don't know.
I thought maybe we could head to the mall.
I suppose we could go to the mall again.
the mall again the mall again the mall again the mall again the mall again the mall again the mall again the mall again the mall again Really? The mall again? Wow, you are so predictable! So ordinary! Predictable? Ordinary? I mean, come on! I play 20 instruments! Yeah, that all start with the letter "B", as in boring.
Tra la la la la la la la la la la la la la la Who's that? Just pretend she's not there.
That's what I do.
Candace? Candace?! Are you there? Uh, yeah.
Yes, sorry.
Forget the mall.
I'm gonna think of something else to do that's really cool and totally different.
'Cause, you know, I gotta be my unpredictable self.
So, Candace is out, peace! Uh, y-you know what? That's so overused.
Candace is out.
Tra la la la la la la la la Candace, I'm on my way to— You know, this feels awfully familiar.
I tell you I'm going out, later you'll tell me Phineas and Ferb are up to something, but there's nothing there to see, so we all have pie.
Just another ordinary day.
Ordinary?! Do I ordinarily do this? Tra la la la la la la la la la la la la la la Tra la la la la la la! Like I said, just another ordinary day.
Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated! Aw, man, why did I save all the manual labor on my newest inator for the hottest day of the year? I might as well be doing hot yoga up in this piece! Can I get a "what-what?" Norm, where's my "what-what?" I'm sorry, sir.
People do not say that anymore.
How do you stay so current? Ah, Perry the Platypus, won't you have a seat? That is not not how you sit on a chair! Which means it is! Because I used a double negative! Sure, it's grammatically incorrect, but it's the core of my newest creation the Double Negative-inator! It takes any negative statement and turns it into a double negative, which which, in turn, makes it positive, I— Anyway, I— I was dreaming about cold weather because it's been so hot lately and I remembered how much I loved the Minty Wink Eggnog they make at Beverly's Lunch downtown.
So I went out to get one.
But then, Beverly told me I couldn't have it because they only make it in the winter.
No matter how I begged and pleaded, she stood firm.
No Minty Wink Eggnog! Because it's not winter! Ugh! Anyway, once I recovered from the shock, I did what I always do.
Solve a simple problem by inventing a complicated and menacing machine.
All I have to do is blast Beverly with this and bzzt! She'll be like, "Oh, I guess you can have it, because it's not not winter".
And, suddenly I'm drinkin' Minty Wink Eggnog, baby! Perhaps then, I can make myself not not ruler of the Tri-State Area, huh? Huh? You didn't see that coming, did you? Oh, don't be cranky, Perry the Platypus, you can have a Minty Wink Eggnog, too.
Nice work, guys! We'll have no trouble beating the heat with the world's largest drop of water.
Yes! By my calculations, we have effectively strengthened the hydrogen bonds between water molecules, so that the surface tension is virtually unbreakable! In your face, physics camp! Booyah! Come on, gang! Let's surf the surface tension! Cowabunga! Totally awesome! Okay.
Today's the big day in the Danville Fish Show.
Are you nervous? Don't worry about it.
It's normal.
Just remember today is your day to shine! So we gonna be scared? "No, Bufie!" Are we gonna be tough? "Yes, Bufie!" So let's see what you got! Just like we practiced, jump through the hoop.
You can do it, buddy! Jump through the hoop! Victory! What am I gonna do, Stace? Jeremy wants to spend time with me, but the best thing I could come up with is the mall! That's how boring I am! Well, there's a lot more interesting things to do.
At least, that's what my mom says.
The café, movie theater It just all seems so so ordinary.
I just gotta find something cool to do to get me outta my rut.
Wanna come along? Nah, I'm sticking to the mall.
It's air-conditioned.
(Song: Extraordinary) I want to be extraordinary Not just extra ordinary It seems like everywhere I see People far more interesting than me I know that change is kind of scary But maybe I should try to vary Some minor detail a small degree A slightly different version of me I could learn to cook vegetarian or take a fashion workshop Meditate, calculate, learn to knit a tank top Yoga, hula, clogging, jogging, walking on a tightrope Take a correspondence course and learn to make my own soap Jumping on a pogo stick, standing in a wheat field Going on a snipe hunt, gotta keep my eyes peeled Take a little time to really decorate my door, and Change my hair to black and then I'll dye it back to orange Underwater taxidermy, shopping for a suitcase Peeling tangerines while placing second in a sack race Lion taming, online gaming, trying to win a prize fight Appearing on a talk show dressed up like a water sprite Yeah! I'm gonna be extraordinary! I'm gonna stand out from the crowd and shout out loud You'll see I'll be a brand new me! On your marks Get set Spherical laps! How cool is that? Awesome! The momentum from the swimming action is causing us to roll! Looks like we're takin' this pool party on the road! Hey, you know what? We can totally steer this thing if we paddle opposite the direction that we wanna go! Seems counter-intuitive, but okay.
Full speed ahead, Ferb! Bumpy Street! Dead ahead! And hang a right onto Zigzag Street! Whoa! Loop-de-Loop Street! At least it's rent-controlled! I'm okay.
Happens all the time.
Okay, a few more tweaks and I'm ready to double down on some negatives! Wow, I— Now, that double negative did not make a positive! Ow! Oh, you are gonna get it now! Oh, no, no, n-no! Now it's stuck in random fire mode! Don't know why I put that mode on there.
Not it! Not it! Not it! Not not it! Get him! We, the members of the jury, find the defendant not not guilty.
So I guess we find him guilty.
Funny, I could've sworn he was innocent.
Hey, can't you see the detour? This is not a through street.
Like I said, it's not not a through street.
Go ahead.
All right! Ugh! This isn't extraordinary! It's just embarrassing! Hey, Candace! Phineas and Ferb? Thanks, Bobbi.
I'll see you next week.
Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Candace, what on earth is on your head? Never mind that! Phineas and Ferb are rolling through town on a giant ball of water! Come on! What about your fruit hat? Ladies and gentlemen, let's hear it for our next contestants, Rodney von Roddenstein and his pet piranha, Fluffy, with their hoop trick! Ta-da! What a terrific new twist to a tired old trick.
Let's see what the judges have to say.
Wow! That puts Rodney and Fluffy in the lead and almost impossible to beat! Next up are Buford and his pet goldfish, Biff, doing their version of the hoop jump trick.
Good luck toppin' that one, guys! Okay, Biffy, we're up! Jump through the— Oh, no! Public art! Right ahead! It must be part of the Public Art Relocation Program! You did it, Biff! We're number one! Congrats, guys! Thanks! I'm gonna put Biff's prize money in a scholarship fund for that fancy fish school in the Maldives! Wait until you see this giant ball of water! Hi, guys! Come on in! The water's great! You're right, Candace.
There is a "giant ball of water".
Though most people prefer to call it a lake.
Wow, a party in the lake? I never would have thought of that! You come up with the best ideas! We can go to the mall tomorrow.
You really want to go to the mall again? We're teenagers.
It's what we do.
Ha! You mis— Ow! That was refreshing.
Ah, that was not not the self-destruct button.
Ugh! Well, oh, man, once again, the place is trashed! You just take off, leaving me here to clean it all up.
Does it ever occur to you, Perry the Platypus, how much of a mess is left after one of our little tête-à-têtes? I bet you, it never even occurred to you that I keep talking to you for a while after you're gone! I mean, it's probably a sad commentary on my life that I'm wearing an apron and talking to a platypus that's no longer How long have you been standing there, Vanessa? Long enough, Dad.