Son of a Critch (2022) s04e13 Episode Script
For the Rest of Your Life
1
ADULT MARK (V.O.):
In the sanctity of my room,
Steve and I had decided
to write our own sketches.
Captain's log, star date, 1990.
I beamed down to a strange new world.
It is newly found land, so
I have decided to call it
"Land Found New."
[NEWFOUNDLAND ACCENT]
What are ya at, b'y?
[GASPS]
Phasers set for stun!
It's too late!
I'm already stunned.
Ah huh.
I don't get it.
Star Trek but set in Newfoundland, Pop.
It's satire.
But why are the Newfoundlanders
always the stupid ones?
I mean, don't sell out your culture!
CBC radio is doing a couple
of nights of young acts.
It's called Fresh Fish.
And if we get in, our skit
will be on national radio!
Ooh.
Check it out.
Ah!
What's a "Cat Fud"?
It's "cat food"!
But the way a cat would spell it!
Ah, I still don't get it.
It's just so stupid, it's funny!
You got the first part right!
Ah [SIGHS]
Spock, beam me up!
BOTH: Ahhh
♪
ADULT MARK (V.O.): I wasn't the only one
who was getting ready for a big show.
Come on, will ya?
You're supposed to be
making toilet paper flowers
for Suzanne's wedding. Here!
Alright, I'm out.
Where do you think you're going?
I got a friggin' wedding to plan!
I gotta go to work.
You're in, Pop.
[GRUMBLES] Well
What?
Well I don't have my glasses.
They're on your face.
My other glasses!
Well, can I get just get
some jeezly help around here?
I have a little project of my own,
and that, too, requires toilet paper.
- Oh!
- Excuse me.
- [PHONE RINGS]
- Oh!
- I got it!
- [PHONE RINGING]
- I got it
- Ah! Hello?
VOICE: [PHONE] Hello!
Is this Mark Critch?
Yeah, this is this is he.
Is that right?
Bye, yeah.
We got it!
No way!
We got it!
What did you get?
We got the show!
We get to do two sketches
on national radio!
- Two?
- And they're paying us!
- A hundred bucks each!
- Oh!
Yeah, I told you you
boys were gonna do it!
- Which night?
- Tomorrow.
Oh!
Oh, no you don't. The
wedding's tomorrow.
But it's our big break.
Yeah, I'm I'm sure
Fox will understand.
Her mother is getting married!
Let him do it. I mean, come on
I mean, they've worked too hard on this.
Mom's right.
I can't let Fox down.
I'm your partner.
You're letting me down.
No, I
ADULT MARK (V.O.): I was
doing the right thing.
But why did it feel so wrong?
[DOOR CLOSES]
♪
♪
- Hold still for a second.
- Make me!
Jennifer, can you come
down so I can see ya?
[FOX SIGHS HEAVILY]
[SIGHS]
Oh, my little woman!
Okay!
Can I wear my sneakers
tomorrow? These dumb shoes hurt.
What are Paul's crowd gonna think
if you're wearing sneakers?
You embarrassed of me?
Will you stop twisting everything?
Look, here, sit down for a second.
[SIGHS] What?
I was wondering if you might
say a few words at the wedding.
You know, something nice to
welcome Paul to the family.
No, I'm
I'm no good at that kind of stuff.
Is it 'cause you don't
want to make a speech
or you don't want him in the family?
Now who's twisting everything?
- I
- Okay, you know what?
No, I'm sick of talking
about this stupid wedding!
Hey!
I don't wanna wear
nothing I don't wanna wear,
and I don't wanna say
nothing I don't wanna say!
♪
It's okay, Mudder.
[DOOR SLAMS UPSTAIRS]
I'll give the speech.
[INHALES SHARPLY]
[PHONE RINGS]
Better listening, VOCM.
I have to drop off the flowers
and Mark wants a run downtown.
I won't be long, but
I just don't want to leave Pop alone.
He's fine, Mary.
He's just a little tired lately, is all.
Something seems different.
Damn thing is unnatural.
Alright, look, I can
take an early lunch.
But hurry on, will ya?
I've only got an hour.
Pop?
- [KETTLE HISSING]
- Pop?
Pop!
[DRAMATIC MUSIC]
[SMOKE ALARM BEEPING]
♪
♪
What have you done now?
The new kettle is electric, Pop!
You can't put it on the burner!
Well, how the hell am I supposed to know
which kettle's which when
you keep switching 'em out?
♪
Look, I
I don't wanna go the dumb wedding.
Asking me to say that I
want Paul to be my step-dad?
That's too much!
Follow your heart.
Wait really?
I thought you'd try
and talk me out of it.
I would never!
What gives?
We got the Fresh Fish show.
What? No way! Look, I
told you you'd get it.
It's tomorrow night.
But the wedding
You need to do that speech,
and I need to be there for you.
- Don't be an idiot.
- What?
I know what it's like to be
forced into doing something
just to make someone else happy.
Look, the service is
in the afternoon, right?
So, what if I come for that,
then leave to do my show,
then come back after?
I'd miss your speech, but
I'd be there for the dance.
Okay, there's not gonna be a speech.
Seriously, go, okay?
I'll be mad if you don't.
How did I get so lucky?
Yeah, I honestly have no idea.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
ADULT MARK (V.O.): Star-crossed
lovers, double-booked.
It's the second time he's done it.
Could have burned the house down.
I'll ask Dr. Bob if he
can fit him in tomorrow
before the wedding.
See what he has to say.
Am I not included in this conversation?
I'm not a child, you know.
And I'm not senile.
- [PLAINTIVE MUSIC]
- Oh, God
♪
♪
You okay?
Well, I've still got my marbles,
if that's what you wanna know.
You're the smartest person I know.
Yeah, well
you better keep that to yourself.
You know, your father's a traitor.
Well, look, I
It's hard to tell somebody
that you love the truth.
But the people that step up and do
those are the ones that really love you.
[CHUCKLES]
Now I know I'm getting old.
You're giving me advice.
You better go to bed.
Big day tomorrow.
For both of us.
Goodnight.
[POIGNANT MUSIC]
♪
♪
[INTRIGUING MUSIC]
ADULT MARK (V.O.):
A race against the clock.
Late to sound check,
but still early for the wedding.
I knew you wouldn't let me down.
Of course.
Can we get a level?
Uh
Hello?
Check. Check one. Check.
Okay? Sounds good.
How many people will hear this?
A million, if we're lucky.
Hear that?
If this goes well, who
knows what might happen?
So you boys are right off the top.
- Do you wanna run it?
- Yeah.
ADULT MARK (V.O.):
This was my big break,
but all that I was concerned
about breaking was a heart.
You know what?
I-I think we should wait for the show.
I don't wanna peak too soon.
Well, that's it. I'll
I'll just rest my voice.
You're not serious.
You're going to that
wedding, aren't you?
I promise I'll be back in time.
But we're first up!
ADULT MARK (V.O.): What can I say?
I was a people-pleaser.
A people-pleaser who
seemed to be out to prove
that you can't please everyone.
I feel like I'm a dog going
to the vet to be snipped.
I'll see if they do that too.
Alright.
A few things have slipped my mind.
No reason to strap me to
a chair and brainwash me.
We're all worried about you, Pop.
We don't think you're losing your mind.
We just want some
peace of mind, you know?
We don't wanna lose you.
Please?
Well, what you waiting for?
[SILENTLY] Thank you.
♪
Oh, that is a big crowd
of people out there.
You look gorgeous!
You ready?
I don't think I can do this.
Oh, it's just butterflies.
What am I even doing?
The kids hates him!
Those kids are better off with
a happy mother, believe me.
But what if I'm just being selfish?
Alright, you shut up and listen.
Now, I was so busy raising
those boys, and the men,
that I nearly forgot who the hell I was.
And then I felt like I had no purpose
when they didn't need me anymore.
Who was I gonna give all
that love to that I had?
Well, I started giving it to me.
And I took my course.
And I know who I am,
and I really like me.
You are gonna love you, too.
If you just do something
for yourself for once.
So, go on out there and get married.
I don't know about this.
Either I can inspire
you, or I can shove you.
But either way,
you are not getting
cold feet at my wedding!
Hit it!
[ORGAN PLAYING PACHELBEL'S CANON IN D]
♪
[SIGHS]
Is Mom okay?
She better be, if she
knows what's good for her.
[CHUCKLES]
♪
Go!
[STARTS PLAYING WAGNER'S BRIDAL CHORUS]
MARK: [CLEARS THROAT]
Hell of a day for it, eh?
Sorry, sorry. Excuse me. Thank you.
[PEOPLE MURMURING]
[RESUMES PLAYING BRIDAL CHORUS]
♪
♪
That's my mudder.
You hurts her, I hurts you.
[ORGAN MUSIC CONTINUES]
♪
So, what do you want from me?
Name, birthday?
Who the prime minister is?
I mean, come on, let's get on with it.
I haven't got all day.
Mr. Critch, can you
draw me a clock face?
Okay, now, he's not that far gone.
Oh. Sweet of you.
Draw me a clock face
showing 10 minutes after 11.
Ten minutes, hm
After 11
[SOMBRE MUSIC]
♪
♪
♪
What now?
Well, we can try medication
to halt the process
for as long as we can
ADULT MARK (V.O.): Time doesn't
need a clock to tick away.
But this is something that
you'll have to live with
for the rest of your natural life.
I'm sorry.
[ORGAN PLAYING
MENDELSSOHN'S WEDDING MARCH]
- [SUZANNE LAUGHS]
- [APPLAUSE]
- Thanks!
- Thanks. Hi!
[APPLAUSE AND ORGAN MUSIC CONTINUE]
Great couple 'a kids.
- Thanks.
- I wish you all the best.
BOTH: Thank you.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
[SILENTLY] I love you.
ADULT MARK (V.O.):
I'd been there for her.
Now to be somewhere else for me.
ADULT MARK (V.O.):
No matter how much we try
to stop the clock, we can't.
EMCEE: Welcome to the Terra Nova
Fringe festival's Fresh Fish!
[APPLAUSE]
There you are.
Here's a young act surely about
to make waves in Atlantic Canada.
Let's hear it for Cat Fud.
[APPLAUSE]
And now, Baywatch!
[AUDIENCE CHUCKLING]
[LAUGHTER]
Some day.
Water's some calm.
Luh!
Whose boat is that?
Skipper Eli's, I thinks.
BOTH: Baywatch!
[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]
ADULT MARK (V.O.): Fox was right.
I couldn't have missed this!
So, aren't you gonna congratulate me?
Guess you got your way. Good for you.
You really aren't gonna
give me a chance, are you?
Okay, well, let's be honest.
I didn't ask you to
be my step-dad, did I?
You wanna be honest? Sure.
Okay. [SIGHS]
I didn't set out to marry
a woman with four kids
No and it's not like I'm
after the family fortune.
And I
love your mother almost
as much as she loves you.
So you can hate me if you want.
But I'm not going anywhere.
♪
MARY: Attention, everyone!
Would you please take your seats?
It's time for the speeches.
♪
MARK: And now
we take you to Jerusalem,
where a young carpenter's son
is having his second last supper.
[LAUGHTER]
Can I take your order?
Yeah, uh, me and my friends
would like a jug 'a water,
one order of the fish,
and a single loaf of bread.
[LAUGHTER]
A jug of water, an order of fish,
and one loaf for 12 guys?
Is is there a problem?
Wait a minute
I know you!
You're that carpenter's son!
He's not my real dad!
[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]
Paul, uh
Paul's a good guy.
Um
Paul's, um
Uh, Paul's got a job and, um,
Paul's got, uh, money,
you know? So that's
That's good. And, um, he smells nice.
- [AWKWARD LAUGHTER]
- No, no, like, I mean,
like, the cologne or
whatever that he wear
like, I don't care how
he smells like, b'ys!
Like, I'm not trying to
Oh, thank God.
[SIGHS] I
I think what Jason was
trying to say was
we've never seen our mom so happy.
I mean, Mom had to raise
us all on her own, so
Mom
I wanted to thank you
for all the sacrifices
you made along the way.
All the part-time jobs you did.
All the fevers we had.
[SUZANNE CHUCKLES]
And all the times you told us
that everything was gonna be okay.
Now it's our turn to tell you
that everything's gonna be okay.
We're a lot to take on, so
[LAUGHTER]
Yeah.
So, Paul
Good luck with that.
[LAUGHTER]
And welcome to the family.
- [PEOPLE CHEERING]
- [APPLAUSE]
Is that wine?
You never ordered any wine!
All I gave you was a jug 'a water
and now there's 12 glasses 'a wine!
Everybody out!
Trust me.
I'll be back!
[APPLAUSE]
EMCEE: Let's hear it again
for Cat Fud, everybody!
Truly an act to watch.
The next act is one
you all know and love.
Please give it up for
Corey and Wade's Playhouse.
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
Ah Woo!
Okay!
And now, please join us
as the happy couple
has their first dance.
[APPLAUSE]
[SHERIFF'S "WHEN I'M WITH YOU" PLAYING]
♪
I never needed love ♪
♪
Like I need you ♪
[TEARFULLY] Losers.
Seriously?
Shut up.
Excuse me. Do you have a card?
My sister's getting married in August.
Oh, I don't.
But you can find me in the
phonebook under Mike Critch.
♪
Maybe it's the way you touch me ♪
♪
Should I be jealous?
He did ask for my number.
I can't say I blame him.
How is Pop?
He's
he's fine.
When I'm with you ♪
♪
Baby, ay-yay ♪
Yeah, yeah ♪
Where you goin'?
I'll be back!
Here, take these, okay?
Oh, baby, ay-yay ♪
Yeah, yeah ♪
ADULT MARK (V.O.): Sometimes
love is simply about
being there for someone.
And sometimes it's
about giving them space
to be themselves.
You may not always be
with the people you love,
and that's okay.
As long as you're always there for them.
How did it go?
I did the speech.
I knew you would.
How was it?
We killed.
I knew you would.
It was the best.
But this is better.
Baby, ay-yay, yeah, yeah ♪
I get chills when I'm with you ♪
Oh-oh ♪
Oh, baby, ay-yay, yeah, yeah ♪
Now the world stands
still when I'm with you. ♪
♪
♪
♪
♪
♪
ADULT MARK (V.O.):
In the sanctity of my room,
Steve and I had decided
to write our own sketches.
Captain's log, star date, 1990.
I beamed down to a strange new world.
It is newly found land, so
I have decided to call it
"Land Found New."
[NEWFOUNDLAND ACCENT]
What are ya at, b'y?
[GASPS]
Phasers set for stun!
It's too late!
I'm already stunned.
Ah huh.
I don't get it.
Star Trek but set in Newfoundland, Pop.
It's satire.
But why are the Newfoundlanders
always the stupid ones?
I mean, don't sell out your culture!
CBC radio is doing a couple
of nights of young acts.
It's called Fresh Fish.
And if we get in, our skit
will be on national radio!
Ooh.
Check it out.
Ah!
What's a "Cat Fud"?
It's "cat food"!
But the way a cat would spell it!
Ah, I still don't get it.
It's just so stupid, it's funny!
You got the first part right!
Ah [SIGHS]
Spock, beam me up!
BOTH: Ahhh
♪
ADULT MARK (V.O.): I wasn't the only one
who was getting ready for a big show.
Come on, will ya?
You're supposed to be
making toilet paper flowers
for Suzanne's wedding. Here!
Alright, I'm out.
Where do you think you're going?
I got a friggin' wedding to plan!
I gotta go to work.
You're in, Pop.
[GRUMBLES] Well
What?
Well I don't have my glasses.
They're on your face.
My other glasses!
Well, can I get just get
some jeezly help around here?
I have a little project of my own,
and that, too, requires toilet paper.
- Oh!
- Excuse me.
- [PHONE RINGS]
- Oh!
- I got it!
- [PHONE RINGING]
- I got it
- Ah! Hello?
VOICE: [PHONE] Hello!
Is this Mark Critch?
Yeah, this is this is he.
Is that right?
Bye, yeah.
We got it!
No way!
We got it!
What did you get?
We got the show!
We get to do two sketches
on national radio!
- Two?
- And they're paying us!
- A hundred bucks each!
- Oh!
Yeah, I told you you
boys were gonna do it!
- Which night?
- Tomorrow.
Oh!
Oh, no you don't. The
wedding's tomorrow.
But it's our big break.
Yeah, I'm I'm sure
Fox will understand.
Her mother is getting married!
Let him do it. I mean, come on
I mean, they've worked too hard on this.
Mom's right.
I can't let Fox down.
I'm your partner.
You're letting me down.
No, I
ADULT MARK (V.O.): I was
doing the right thing.
But why did it feel so wrong?
[DOOR CLOSES]
♪
♪
- Hold still for a second.
- Make me!
Jennifer, can you come
down so I can see ya?
[FOX SIGHS HEAVILY]
[SIGHS]
Oh, my little woman!
Okay!
Can I wear my sneakers
tomorrow? These dumb shoes hurt.
What are Paul's crowd gonna think
if you're wearing sneakers?
You embarrassed of me?
Will you stop twisting everything?
Look, here, sit down for a second.
[SIGHS] What?
I was wondering if you might
say a few words at the wedding.
You know, something nice to
welcome Paul to the family.
No, I'm
I'm no good at that kind of stuff.
Is it 'cause you don't
want to make a speech
or you don't want him in the family?
Now who's twisting everything?
- I
- Okay, you know what?
No, I'm sick of talking
about this stupid wedding!
Hey!
I don't wanna wear
nothing I don't wanna wear,
and I don't wanna say
nothing I don't wanna say!
♪
It's okay, Mudder.
[DOOR SLAMS UPSTAIRS]
I'll give the speech.
[INHALES SHARPLY]
[PHONE RINGS]
Better listening, VOCM.
I have to drop off the flowers
and Mark wants a run downtown.
I won't be long, but
I just don't want to leave Pop alone.
He's fine, Mary.
He's just a little tired lately, is all.
Something seems different.
Damn thing is unnatural.
Alright, look, I can
take an early lunch.
But hurry on, will ya?
I've only got an hour.
Pop?
- [KETTLE HISSING]
- Pop?
Pop!
[DRAMATIC MUSIC]
[SMOKE ALARM BEEPING]
♪
♪
What have you done now?
The new kettle is electric, Pop!
You can't put it on the burner!
Well, how the hell am I supposed to know
which kettle's which when
you keep switching 'em out?
♪
Look, I
I don't wanna go the dumb wedding.
Asking me to say that I
want Paul to be my step-dad?
That's too much!
Follow your heart.
Wait really?
I thought you'd try
and talk me out of it.
I would never!
What gives?
We got the Fresh Fish show.
What? No way! Look, I
told you you'd get it.
It's tomorrow night.
But the wedding
You need to do that speech,
and I need to be there for you.
- Don't be an idiot.
- What?
I know what it's like to be
forced into doing something
just to make someone else happy.
Look, the service is
in the afternoon, right?
So, what if I come for that,
then leave to do my show,
then come back after?
I'd miss your speech, but
I'd be there for the dance.
Okay, there's not gonna be a speech.
Seriously, go, okay?
I'll be mad if you don't.
How did I get so lucky?
Yeah, I honestly have no idea.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
ADULT MARK (V.O.): Star-crossed
lovers, double-booked.
It's the second time he's done it.
Could have burned the house down.
I'll ask Dr. Bob if he
can fit him in tomorrow
before the wedding.
See what he has to say.
Am I not included in this conversation?
I'm not a child, you know.
And I'm not senile.
- [PLAINTIVE MUSIC]
- Oh, God
♪
♪
You okay?
Well, I've still got my marbles,
if that's what you wanna know.
You're the smartest person I know.
Yeah, well
you better keep that to yourself.
You know, your father's a traitor.
Well, look, I
It's hard to tell somebody
that you love the truth.
But the people that step up and do
those are the ones that really love you.
[CHUCKLES]
Now I know I'm getting old.
You're giving me advice.
You better go to bed.
Big day tomorrow.
For both of us.
Goodnight.
[POIGNANT MUSIC]
♪
♪
[INTRIGUING MUSIC]
ADULT MARK (V.O.):
A race against the clock.
Late to sound check,
but still early for the wedding.
I knew you wouldn't let me down.
Of course.
Can we get a level?
Uh
Hello?
Check. Check one. Check.
Okay? Sounds good.
How many people will hear this?
A million, if we're lucky.
Hear that?
If this goes well, who
knows what might happen?
So you boys are right off the top.
- Do you wanna run it?
- Yeah.
ADULT MARK (V.O.):
This was my big break,
but all that I was concerned
about breaking was a heart.
You know what?
I-I think we should wait for the show.
I don't wanna peak too soon.
Well, that's it. I'll
I'll just rest my voice.
You're not serious.
You're going to that
wedding, aren't you?
I promise I'll be back in time.
But we're first up!
ADULT MARK (V.O.): What can I say?
I was a people-pleaser.
A people-pleaser who
seemed to be out to prove
that you can't please everyone.
I feel like I'm a dog going
to the vet to be snipped.
I'll see if they do that too.
Alright.
A few things have slipped my mind.
No reason to strap me to
a chair and brainwash me.
We're all worried about you, Pop.
We don't think you're losing your mind.
We just want some
peace of mind, you know?
We don't wanna lose you.
Please?
Well, what you waiting for?
[SILENTLY] Thank you.
♪
Oh, that is a big crowd
of people out there.
You look gorgeous!
You ready?
I don't think I can do this.
Oh, it's just butterflies.
What am I even doing?
The kids hates him!
Those kids are better off with
a happy mother, believe me.
But what if I'm just being selfish?
Alright, you shut up and listen.
Now, I was so busy raising
those boys, and the men,
that I nearly forgot who the hell I was.
And then I felt like I had no purpose
when they didn't need me anymore.
Who was I gonna give all
that love to that I had?
Well, I started giving it to me.
And I took my course.
And I know who I am,
and I really like me.
You are gonna love you, too.
If you just do something
for yourself for once.
So, go on out there and get married.
I don't know about this.
Either I can inspire
you, or I can shove you.
But either way,
you are not getting
cold feet at my wedding!
Hit it!
[ORGAN PLAYING PACHELBEL'S CANON IN D]
♪
[SIGHS]
Is Mom okay?
She better be, if she
knows what's good for her.
[CHUCKLES]
♪
Go!
[STARTS PLAYING WAGNER'S BRIDAL CHORUS]
MARK: [CLEARS THROAT]
Hell of a day for it, eh?
Sorry, sorry. Excuse me. Thank you.
[PEOPLE MURMURING]
[RESUMES PLAYING BRIDAL CHORUS]
♪
♪
That's my mudder.
You hurts her, I hurts you.
[ORGAN MUSIC CONTINUES]
♪
So, what do you want from me?
Name, birthday?
Who the prime minister is?
I mean, come on, let's get on with it.
I haven't got all day.
Mr. Critch, can you
draw me a clock face?
Okay, now, he's not that far gone.
Oh. Sweet of you.
Draw me a clock face
showing 10 minutes after 11.
Ten minutes, hm
After 11
[SOMBRE MUSIC]
♪
♪
♪
What now?
Well, we can try medication
to halt the process
for as long as we can
ADULT MARK (V.O.): Time doesn't
need a clock to tick away.
But this is something that
you'll have to live with
for the rest of your natural life.
I'm sorry.
[ORGAN PLAYING
MENDELSSOHN'S WEDDING MARCH]
- [SUZANNE LAUGHS]
- [APPLAUSE]
- Thanks!
- Thanks. Hi!
[APPLAUSE AND ORGAN MUSIC CONTINUE]
Great couple 'a kids.
- Thanks.
- I wish you all the best.
BOTH: Thank you.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
[SILENTLY] I love you.
ADULT MARK (V.O.):
I'd been there for her.
Now to be somewhere else for me.
ADULT MARK (V.O.):
No matter how much we try
to stop the clock, we can't.
EMCEE: Welcome to the Terra Nova
Fringe festival's Fresh Fish!
[APPLAUSE]
There you are.
Here's a young act surely about
to make waves in Atlantic Canada.
Let's hear it for Cat Fud.
[APPLAUSE]
And now, Baywatch!
[AUDIENCE CHUCKLING]
[LAUGHTER]
Some day.
Water's some calm.
Luh!
Whose boat is that?
Skipper Eli's, I thinks.
BOTH: Baywatch!
[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]
ADULT MARK (V.O.): Fox was right.
I couldn't have missed this!
So, aren't you gonna congratulate me?
Guess you got your way. Good for you.
You really aren't gonna
give me a chance, are you?
Okay, well, let's be honest.
I didn't ask you to
be my step-dad, did I?
You wanna be honest? Sure.
Okay. [SIGHS]
I didn't set out to marry
a woman with four kids
No and it's not like I'm
after the family fortune.
And I
love your mother almost
as much as she loves you.
So you can hate me if you want.
But I'm not going anywhere.
♪
MARY: Attention, everyone!
Would you please take your seats?
It's time for the speeches.
♪
MARK: And now
we take you to Jerusalem,
where a young carpenter's son
is having his second last supper.
[LAUGHTER]
Can I take your order?
Yeah, uh, me and my friends
would like a jug 'a water,
one order of the fish,
and a single loaf of bread.
[LAUGHTER]
A jug of water, an order of fish,
and one loaf for 12 guys?
Is is there a problem?
Wait a minute
I know you!
You're that carpenter's son!
He's not my real dad!
[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]
Paul, uh
Paul's a good guy.
Um
Paul's, um
Uh, Paul's got a job and, um,
Paul's got, uh, money,
you know? So that's
That's good. And, um, he smells nice.
- [AWKWARD LAUGHTER]
- No, no, like, I mean,
like, the cologne or
whatever that he wear
like, I don't care how
he smells like, b'ys!
Like, I'm not trying to
Oh, thank God.
[SIGHS] I
I think what Jason was
trying to say was
we've never seen our mom so happy.
I mean, Mom had to raise
us all on her own, so
Mom
I wanted to thank you
for all the sacrifices
you made along the way.
All the part-time jobs you did.
All the fevers we had.
[SUZANNE CHUCKLES]
And all the times you told us
that everything was gonna be okay.
Now it's our turn to tell you
that everything's gonna be okay.
We're a lot to take on, so
[LAUGHTER]
Yeah.
So, Paul
Good luck with that.
[LAUGHTER]
And welcome to the family.
- [PEOPLE CHEERING]
- [APPLAUSE]
Is that wine?
You never ordered any wine!
All I gave you was a jug 'a water
and now there's 12 glasses 'a wine!
Everybody out!
Trust me.
I'll be back!
[APPLAUSE]
EMCEE: Let's hear it again
for Cat Fud, everybody!
Truly an act to watch.
The next act is one
you all know and love.
Please give it up for
Corey and Wade's Playhouse.
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
Ah Woo!
Okay!
And now, please join us
as the happy couple
has their first dance.
[APPLAUSE]
[SHERIFF'S "WHEN I'M WITH YOU" PLAYING]
♪
I never needed love ♪
♪
Like I need you ♪
[TEARFULLY] Losers.
Seriously?
Shut up.
Excuse me. Do you have a card?
My sister's getting married in August.
Oh, I don't.
But you can find me in the
phonebook under Mike Critch.
♪
Maybe it's the way you touch me ♪
♪
Should I be jealous?
He did ask for my number.
I can't say I blame him.
How is Pop?
He's
he's fine.
When I'm with you ♪
♪
Baby, ay-yay ♪
Yeah, yeah ♪
Where you goin'?
I'll be back!
Here, take these, okay?
Oh, baby, ay-yay ♪
Yeah, yeah ♪
ADULT MARK (V.O.): Sometimes
love is simply about
being there for someone.
And sometimes it's
about giving them space
to be themselves.
You may not always be
with the people you love,
and that's okay.
As long as you're always there for them.
How did it go?
I did the speech.
I knew you would.
How was it?
We killed.
I knew you would.
It was the best.
But this is better.
Baby, ay-yay, yeah, yeah ♪
I get chills when I'm with you ♪
Oh-oh ♪
Oh, baby, ay-yay, yeah, yeah ♪
Now the world stands
still when I'm with you. ♪
♪
♪
♪
♪
♪