The A-Team (1983) s04e14 Episode Script
The A-Team Is Coming, the A-Team Is Coming
1 (Lean) That's Katrina Karpov.
The star of the Russian ballet.
Katrina? Where is she? Welcome to freedom.
I hope all of you will be all right.
How is Ivan gonna start World War Ill? By stealing Abraxas.
It appears that the A- has jumped sides and gone to work for the Russians.
From here on out, it's shoot to kill.
You're not gonna get away with this, you commie flake.
(male narrator) In 1972, a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit.
These men promptly escaped from a maximum-security stockade to the Los Angeles underground.
Today, still wanted by the government they survive as soldiers of fortune.
If you have a problem, if no one else can help and if you can find them maybe you can hire the A-Team.
[gun firing.]
Don't move! We're here-- I know what you're here for.
Three cases of Uzis, 10,000 rounds of ammo three grenade launchers and two anti-tank weapons.
I want to inspect the weapons Mr.
Ross.
Yeah? I want to inspect the cash.
There should be $100,000 in there.
(Padavich) I want to try it.
N[orchestral music playing.]
Get out of the way, pal.
[shushing.]
(Face) Hey.
Is that the hottest broad you've ever seen, or what? I'm appalled that in the presence of one of nature's most perfect creations that you can display the crass behavior of a drunken salesman at an aluminum siding convention in Atlantic City.
Listen, pal, all I said was she's one red-hot bimbo.
Just be quiet.
Shh! [audience applauding.]
[audience cheering.]
Sasha sends his regards.
He'll see you soon.
[pulley squeaking.]
So my critical friend, how did you like the performance? [speaking Russian.]
Yes, I would like to ask a question to one of your typical performers.
[audience continues cheering.]
Ask him, would he like to sell aluminum siding in this country? Katrina? Katrina? Where is she? [yelling in Russian.]
(tour manager) Katrina.
I want her.
Hey! Hey, pal, you can't treat a member of 66 like this just because you're from out of town.
[people chattering.]
[speaking Russian.]
[yelling in Russian.]
Nyet, comrades! [tires screeching.]
Welcome to freedom.
[car honking.]
Well, the pen is mightier than the sword, but it's no match for a gun.
Nice job, B.
A.
Now, let's get rid of this wreck and get back to the van.
You can take off your tutu, darling.
Welcome to America.
Here's your dance bag.
(Hannibal) I'm sorry you had to go through all this, Katrina.
[door closing.]
It was wonderful.
Somehow I thought a candlelight dinner might be more to your liking.
It was like James Bond, no? You know, Katrina, I have to agree with you from the standpoint of entertainment on the Murdock scale of one to ten, I'd have to give it a nine.
A nine? Let me see you drive like that! But, I never give a ten.
Never, never, never, never, never.
I mean, there's no such thing as perfection in the arts, B.
A.
This is a ten on B.
A.
's scale.
Ten being total pain.
Come on, guys.
You'll be in close quarters here for four days.
I have to wait to see my brother for four days? Well, we have to make sure Sasha isn't being followed.
They know you have a brother in this country.
Let's settle in, it's been a long day.
Lieutenant, you take the first watch in here with Katrina.
Murdock, you and B.
A.
and I'll split it up after that.
Pleasant dreams, guys.
[sighing.]
Hannibal, don't you think it is a bit of a mistake to let Face stay in there with Katrina? I mean, isn't that like giving the henhouse keys to the fox? [sighing.]
Captain, we must all deal with our own weaknesses.
Yes, the old tragic flaw.
The cornerstone of Greek drama from Euripides to the latter episodes of Mister Ed.
Two points.
I am bored.
Well, I I have heard so much about American men.
I'm dying to try one on.
I think you mean, try one out.
Whatever.
[chuckles.]
How you say, "Take off all your clothing"? Actually, you got that just right.
You know, your English isn't that bad.
Your shoulders are not that bad.
I think I take a bath and slip into nothing more comfortable.
You mean something more But I get the idea.
When I return you wear nothing, no? Nothing, yes.
Yeah.
Yes.
[door closing.]
Yes! [crickets chirping.]
[door closing.]
Sorry, pal.
No, I don't believe it.
Dimitri Shastovich, right here in our living room.
What? They've got you baby-sitting ballerinas now, Dimitri? What can I say, it's been very slow for me since Vietnam.
But I must say, you three are looking very well.
(Dimitri) How long has it been? Don't get him started, Hannibal.
He can outtalk Murdock.
Hannibal, it's just coffee.
(Hannibal) You set us up, Dimitri.
What's going on? You mean you knew all along? Had a pretty good idea.
Your little phone call confirmed it.
(Hannibal) Dimitri? I'm afraid it's going to be a long story.
I knew it.
That's why he brought the coffee.
Don't get him started, Hannibal.
You'd better condense it to 25 words or less otherwise, B.
A.
's gonna wanna shut your mouth permanently and I'm not sure I can stop him.
All right.
I have reason to believe that one of my countrymen within 36 hours will commit act of terrorism which will bring our two countries on to brink of war.
Nuclear war.
I have been sent by my government to stop this from happening.
So, on behalf of people of the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics we would like to hire A-Team.
Soviet colonel, whose plan to attack West was vetoed by Kremlin decided to go ahead with plan went underground in Los Angeles to create terrorism and possibly trigger World War Ill.
Why don't your people grab him? A full-scale Soviet operation would be stopped.
They would be picked up.
lam under deep cover and I have very little time.
There's something you're not telling us, Dimitri.
It shows in your eyes.
(Dimitri) Ivan Padavich.
[exclaiming.]
Ivan the Terrible.
That's is another reason that I come to you.
You know him.
You know how he thinks.
You fought against him in Vietnam.
You remember what he did to that village in the Delta.
He's not a soldier, he's a butcher.
If he's in this country, we've gotta get him.
Hannibal, I don't wanna work for this sucker.
But I hate Padavich even more.
You know, Colonel, this jumped off the Art page.
It's a banner headline, four columns.
You said it.
And the key question? How is Ivan gonna start World War Ill? By stealing Abraxas.
A super satellite which can destroy 80% of Russian missiles.
Why the heck can't you just contact the boys in Washington? They would not even acknowledge its existence.
We do not know where it is.
We don't even know what it looks like.
But sources tell us that it will be moved within two days.
This weapon is so secret your government chooses to relocate it every two months.
Clever.
Padavich must have gotten to someone who not only knew where it was but how to make it operational.
But he must move in 36 hours.
We'll want files on Ivan and all of his known associates.
I cannot help you.
lam not even in the country.
But if you need some help you go to Soviet Embassy.
[all exclaiming.]
Then we are on the same side.
For now.
Here is floor plan of Embassy.
You've certainly come prepared.
I anticipate.
All right, here is main entrance.
Here is Consulate General Zamyatin's office.
Here is file room.
This is Padavich in Russian.
What's this small room here? It's infirmary.
How are you feeling, Murdock? I'm fine, why-- [Murdock chattering.]
(Murdock) Downwind! Downwind! [thudding.]
[alarm ringing.]
[man speaking Russian.]
[Murdock groaning.]
(guard) Freeze! Don't move! (Murdock) What are you looking for, a unicide? I'm a victim of gravity.
(Zamyatin) Shut off those bells! Halt! Where are you going? That's our glider, that's our pilot.
What is this? I think this is the Russian Consulate, Coach.
Gee.
Murdock really went off course, when he broke that strut.
[gun cocking.]
He could be hurt.
Comrade, you don't mind if I call you comrade, do you? Good.
Listen, you see with the crosswind (Zamyatin) Who are you? What are you doing here? Get your hands off that equipment.
Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh! Coach.
Coach.
Einstein was right, the strut broke.
Schrodinger, Heisenberg they didn't know what they were talking about.
[sobbing.]
That's why I was out of the zone.
(Hannibal) I can't believe it.
The final round of Point Dume National Gliding Championships.
And we're stuck with a broken strut.
You see, infinity is like an envelope you can stretch it across your eyes put a light behind it, but you can never see the light because it won't travel fast enough.
Yes, he's delirious.
He needs medical attention, Let's get him out of here.
Nyet.
He cannot leave.
This is Soviet property.
He will be detained.
Oh, give me a break.
I mean, look at him.
Does he look like a spy? Why, he's the living personification [screaming.]
of the flying all-American boy.
Yes.
He will be detained along with his equipment.
(Zamyatin) Come with me.
Get hold of our lawyer.
Have him contact the State Department.
Right, Coach.
Kepler was right semi-permeable gases are much stronger downwind.
You see? [camera clicking.]
All the talk about gas, we're forgetting about the unified theory.
We have the strong force and a weak force and there's gravity and there's electromagnetism.
We can't forget about that.
[birds chirping.]
(Hannibal) Make sure he's an expert.
Be sure you get all the bone in the back of his neck.
[machine beeping.]
It's for the glider.
This is an outrage.
The State Department will hear about this.
I have sent for a doctor.
And you will remain here, until we are satisfied that this is all an accident.
Let me tell you something, pal.
President Reagan is a big supporter of hang gliding.
You could be starting an international incident here.
I will take my chances.
You come with me.
[machine beeping.]
I want a report of this as soon as possible.
This has got to be the most aerodynamic airplane Okay, boys.
(guard) Halt! Halt? But my body is aerodynamically perfect and this is the only launchpad in 30 miles.
Strip-search them again.
If they are clean, cut them free.
[screaming.]
How are you, son? Now you see, he's got brain damage.
Oh, get out, you two, I never want to see you again! Get out of here! [Murdock screaming.]
(Dimitri) Was investigation fruitful? Yeah, we got this on Padavich, but we can't read it.
[speaking in Russian.]
Contact this man named Bertka.
His credentials for being a radical is quiet extensive.
Try this on him.
It's a variation of sodium pentothal.
It's not only truth serum but, if induced, can also cause temporary amnesia.
Peppermint, my favorite flavor.
Be careful.
If you use too much, act like laughing gas.
(Katrina) Shasti, are you ready to go now? (Face) Shasti? (Hannibal) What's going on? lam afraid she must turn herself in to Consulate.
Short defection, huh? No, Face, that's not the way it happened at all.
She was kidnapped by the CIA.
She was tortured, escaped and then ended on the front steps of the Consulate.
(Hannibal) What will they do to her, Dimitri? Well, since she is star of ballet troupe I do not feel she will suffer any consequences.
Can you guarantee that? Yes, I can.
Listen, I'm sorry about last night.
So am I.
[door opening.]
Well, I hope you'll be all right.
Face, the clock's ticking.
I hope all of you will be all right.
[door closing.]
[clock ticking.]
Once we've penetrated the perimeter we'll proceed to the centermost building here.
There we'll place a single explosive charge at the centre of the steel door.
(Bertka) The fuse will be set for six seconds.
Once the door is blown, we'll take our positions here, here, and here.
Situated in these positions we should be able to hold the entire area secure.
Very good.
White team.
White team will proceed into the structure and liberate this corridor.
(Padavich) Nyet.
Nyet.
[gun cocking.]
The only way we succeed is if we all carry out the plan precisely.
There can be no mistakes.
All personnel will be taken here and neutralized.
At which point, my team Red team moves into the central chamber and gains control of Abraxas.
Now I want you to go over every detail of phase two in your minds.
We are less than 24 hours away from attacking.
Bertka.
Remember, tomorrow you're meeting Panchow.
He is the key.
With him, we can bring this country to its knees.
You can trust me, Mikhail.
I know.
[clock ticking.]
Bull Fulbright.
I'm Lean.
SIA.
In charge of special operations in covert anti-radical procedures, West Coast.
Well, what brings the company down here to my shore? In the past 24 hours there's been a defection of a Russian ballerina [typewriter keys clicking.]
that ended in a KGB shoot-out and a dramatic rise in intelligence reports on the movements of radicals.
Sounds to me like you had a very busy morning.
I'm just dying to know how I fit into your commie mumbo jumbo.
Routine surveillance photos taken in front of the Russian Consulate.
(Bull) Smith and Peck.
I thought that might pique your interest.
It appears the A-Team has jumped sides and gone to work for the Russians.
Traitors, huh? I love it.
There's somethings, Lean, that never change.
All right, from here on out, it's shoot to kill.
Thank you.
(Bertka) Hey, what's going on? Who are you guys? (Murdock) Gas company.
We just found a leak underneath this building and three dead bodies, so get out of here, all of you.
[people murmuring.]
Leak? I don't smell anything.
You don't smell-- [exclaiming.]
Listen, I tell you, I wish I had a nickel for every poor slob who never smelled anything.
Gas is like a ghost.
Floating through the air, eating up oxygen and bam! And there you are, lying on the floor with your eyes bulging purple lips.
Really? Can you tell me where the meter is? Nine times out often times that's the culprit.
Sure, it's out here.
[laughing.]
We're looking for Mikhail Padavich.
Can you tell us where he is? [laughing.]
You guys look like mosquitoes.
He's wigging out on us.
You gave him too much of that stuff.
I expected more from a fellow journalist.
What? Have you forgotten the five W's? What, where, when, where Where is Padavich? Why? [laughing.]
Pull around the back.
Bertka will unlock the door.
Go now! That's Ivan, let's go.
I have to be at the Malibu Ranch Market by 5:00.
What? A dozen oranges.
Move to the next stand, three tomatoes.
No more, no less.
Then a bouquet of flowers Sounds like a code.
And that's how you find the big cheese.
[machine gun firing.]
[laughing.]
[tires screeching.]
[shells clinking.]
(Murdock) Bertka was babbling some kind of code before Padavich burst in on us.
He said something about later this afternoon at the Malibu Ranch Market.
Yeah, then a shopping list.
Oranges, tomatoes, flowers.
You remember that Cong captain that we captured in the Nui Kto mountains? Oh, yeah.
Ivan was an advisor in his company.
Precisely.
Remember when we interrogated Ivan he told us how he made contact with people that he met for the first time? Always in a public place and usually in the village market.
And they had a little charade worked out where the contact would go from booth to booth and he'd buy particular items in a certain order.
That way Ivan could identify the contact and see if he was being followed.
We got to get to this guy before Padavich does.
I was sent to meet you.
Shall we? Okay, you talk and you'll live, it's as simple as that, pal.
[people chattering.]
Who are you, anyway? I am deaf, I cannot hear.
Come on, we gotta tell Murdock.
You know, you're very easy to spot and you're quite unaware of the fact that you too are being watched.
Mr.
Panchow? Please, please, not the name.
Not the name.
I hope that your associates are capable of executing their duties better than you.
Follow me, but not to close to my heels.
[van horn honking.]
You must be deaf.
I don't believe it.
Dimitri Shastovich.
We didn't even think he was in the country.
(Bull) Who's the skinny broad? Unless I've missed my guess, that's Katrina Karpov the star of the Russian ballet who defected yesterday.
They must have made her change her mind.
[tires screeching.]
You know, Shastovich goes back a long ways with your A-Team.
Shastovich.
Shastovich.
Shastovich.
Isn't that the name of the guy they captured during the bank robbery in Hanoi? Yeah, they tried to bring him back as a prisoner.
But he never got there.
That's the guy.
At their trial, Smith claimed they were on a ridge just north of the DMZ when Shastovich bolted and jumped about 10 feet onto some rocks.
Broke both legs.
With the enemy on their trail there was no way to carry him out.
Or maybe they just let him go.
[clock ticking.]
That's close enough, B.
A.
[gun cocking.]
[gun fires.]
Welcome Mr.
Panchow.
Are you through with your parlor games? We have a lot of work to do.
You just take care of the laser we'll handle the rest.
He lost his hearing several years ago but he can read lips quite well, now.
[speaking Russian.]
Let's go.
Looks like Russian, spelled phonetically.
[ringing.]
Dimitri, I need a translation.
It's phonetic.
Sounds like Yucca Yar Sierra Doroga pyatt mele posle Acton.
It's Yucca Canyon, Sierra Highway, five miles past Acton.
Got you.
Let's go.
In an hour Abraxas will be ours.
Then this world will be a different place.
Let's go.
Stick to this ridge and stay above them.
(Bull) Freeze! Or I'll drop you where you stand.
You're not gonna believe this, General.
[birds chirping.]
This time, Smith, I truly got you.
A half a dozen men being led by a Russian military expert.
They're trying steal something called Abraxas.
Abraxas? What do you know about Abraxas? That it's a laser.
But it won't be ours very long, if we don't move fast.
Forget it, Smith.
We got your man, Shastovich.
We know you're working for the Russians.
We're not working for the Russians.
We are working with them.
That's a subtle distinction.
Not really.
Shastovich came to us for help to stop a Russian colonel who's gone over the edge and wants to start World War Ill.
That's ridiculous.
Maybe not.
Abraxas is the code name for a killer satellite that's located not far from here.
When the system is in place, it's capable of destroying 80% of Russia's missiles while they're still in outer space.
And we have a man, who has infiltrated the radicals.
So, what's it gonna be, gentlemen? Okay, Smith, it's your show.
No way, Lean.
I'll leave two men here, to take care of these people.
We're gonna go in and get those clowns ourselves.
We'll go as a unit.
Under one condition.
When this is over, you drop your weapons and you surrender to me.
[birds chirping.]
Agreed.
[guns firing.]
[Hannibal chattering.]
I'll take the right.
Count to two and then you take the left.
You got it.
Let's go.
Get in, come on.
[machine guns firing.]
[alarm blaring.]
Who are you? A man with many friends and they're all outside.
Take your men and join Bertka, hold them off.
You're gonna have to carry this out of here.
[machine guns firing.]
Careful.
Put it there.
You are going to drive this through the wall.
Man, I'm in the risk pool already.
They're gonna cancel my policy.
Shut up.
Do as I say.
[alarm continues blaring.]
[explosions.]
[grunting.]
[grunting.]
[groaning.]
Are you all right, Colonel? Yeah, I'm all right.
How about you? Well, I won't be doing my jeté for this week.
I twisted my knee, I think.
Here.
Tie that creep to a tree and then take off.
We'd give ourselves up, General but remember what Ulysses Grant once said "There are no promises in war, just strategies.
" I thought you'd feel that way, Colonel.
I'm glad you understand.
You know what General Fulbright says? [guns cocking.]
"The opera ain't over till the fat lady sings.
" It's ironic, huh, guys? Every time we try to serve our country, we end up behind bars.
Yeah, thanks to Dimitri.
I don't think he sold us out, B.
A.
He's not the type.
So how does it feel to heave the A-Team's duffel bag under your bunk? Piece of cake.
I don't understand Becker's problem trying to run these clowns down.
[machine guns firing.]
Drop your weapons! You're not gonna get away with this, you commie flake.
Do not intend to.
15 minutes.
My men and I will surrender our weapons.
But if you try to stop the A- from escaping before then I will kill you.
That is promise.
Nice working with you, General.
Now what's gonna happen to you, Dimitri? Diplomatic immunity.
They put me on plane, send me back to Soviet Union.
I'll retire in dacha outside of Moscow and write my memoirs.
Too bad nobody's ever gonna get to read them.
Might be the story of the century.
Why don't you do it for me, my friend? You are a journalist.
And thank you, Colonel.
Sure pal.
Here, have a cigar.
The star of the Russian ballet.
Katrina? Where is she? Welcome to freedom.
I hope all of you will be all right.
How is Ivan gonna start World War Ill? By stealing Abraxas.
It appears that the A- has jumped sides and gone to work for the Russians.
From here on out, it's shoot to kill.
You're not gonna get away with this, you commie flake.
(male narrator) In 1972, a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit.
These men promptly escaped from a maximum-security stockade to the Los Angeles underground.
Today, still wanted by the government they survive as soldiers of fortune.
If you have a problem, if no one else can help and if you can find them maybe you can hire the A-Team.
[gun firing.]
Don't move! We're here-- I know what you're here for.
Three cases of Uzis, 10,000 rounds of ammo three grenade launchers and two anti-tank weapons.
I want to inspect the weapons Mr.
Ross.
Yeah? I want to inspect the cash.
There should be $100,000 in there.
(Padavich) I want to try it.
N[orchestral music playing.]
Get out of the way, pal.
[shushing.]
(Face) Hey.
Is that the hottest broad you've ever seen, or what? I'm appalled that in the presence of one of nature's most perfect creations that you can display the crass behavior of a drunken salesman at an aluminum siding convention in Atlantic City.
Listen, pal, all I said was she's one red-hot bimbo.
Just be quiet.
Shh! [audience applauding.]
[audience cheering.]
Sasha sends his regards.
He'll see you soon.
[pulley squeaking.]
So my critical friend, how did you like the performance? [speaking Russian.]
Yes, I would like to ask a question to one of your typical performers.
[audience continues cheering.]
Ask him, would he like to sell aluminum siding in this country? Katrina? Katrina? Where is she? [yelling in Russian.]
(tour manager) Katrina.
I want her.
Hey! Hey, pal, you can't treat a member of 66 like this just because you're from out of town.
[people chattering.]
[speaking Russian.]
[yelling in Russian.]
Nyet, comrades! [tires screeching.]
Welcome to freedom.
[car honking.]
Well, the pen is mightier than the sword, but it's no match for a gun.
Nice job, B.
A.
Now, let's get rid of this wreck and get back to the van.
You can take off your tutu, darling.
Welcome to America.
Here's your dance bag.
(Hannibal) I'm sorry you had to go through all this, Katrina.
[door closing.]
It was wonderful.
Somehow I thought a candlelight dinner might be more to your liking.
It was like James Bond, no? You know, Katrina, I have to agree with you from the standpoint of entertainment on the Murdock scale of one to ten, I'd have to give it a nine.
A nine? Let me see you drive like that! But, I never give a ten.
Never, never, never, never, never.
I mean, there's no such thing as perfection in the arts, B.
A.
This is a ten on B.
A.
's scale.
Ten being total pain.
Come on, guys.
You'll be in close quarters here for four days.
I have to wait to see my brother for four days? Well, we have to make sure Sasha isn't being followed.
They know you have a brother in this country.
Let's settle in, it's been a long day.
Lieutenant, you take the first watch in here with Katrina.
Murdock, you and B.
A.
and I'll split it up after that.
Pleasant dreams, guys.
[sighing.]
Hannibal, don't you think it is a bit of a mistake to let Face stay in there with Katrina? I mean, isn't that like giving the henhouse keys to the fox? [sighing.]
Captain, we must all deal with our own weaknesses.
Yes, the old tragic flaw.
The cornerstone of Greek drama from Euripides to the latter episodes of Mister Ed.
Two points.
I am bored.
Well, I I have heard so much about American men.
I'm dying to try one on.
I think you mean, try one out.
Whatever.
[chuckles.]
How you say, "Take off all your clothing"? Actually, you got that just right.
You know, your English isn't that bad.
Your shoulders are not that bad.
I think I take a bath and slip into nothing more comfortable.
You mean something more But I get the idea.
When I return you wear nothing, no? Nothing, yes.
Yeah.
Yes.
[door closing.]
Yes! [crickets chirping.]
[door closing.]
Sorry, pal.
No, I don't believe it.
Dimitri Shastovich, right here in our living room.
What? They've got you baby-sitting ballerinas now, Dimitri? What can I say, it's been very slow for me since Vietnam.
But I must say, you three are looking very well.
(Dimitri) How long has it been? Don't get him started, Hannibal.
He can outtalk Murdock.
Hannibal, it's just coffee.
(Hannibal) You set us up, Dimitri.
What's going on? You mean you knew all along? Had a pretty good idea.
Your little phone call confirmed it.
(Hannibal) Dimitri? I'm afraid it's going to be a long story.
I knew it.
That's why he brought the coffee.
Don't get him started, Hannibal.
You'd better condense it to 25 words or less otherwise, B.
A.
's gonna wanna shut your mouth permanently and I'm not sure I can stop him.
All right.
I have reason to believe that one of my countrymen within 36 hours will commit act of terrorism which will bring our two countries on to brink of war.
Nuclear war.
I have been sent by my government to stop this from happening.
So, on behalf of people of the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics we would like to hire A-Team.
Soviet colonel, whose plan to attack West was vetoed by Kremlin decided to go ahead with plan went underground in Los Angeles to create terrorism and possibly trigger World War Ill.
Why don't your people grab him? A full-scale Soviet operation would be stopped.
They would be picked up.
lam under deep cover and I have very little time.
There's something you're not telling us, Dimitri.
It shows in your eyes.
(Dimitri) Ivan Padavich.
[exclaiming.]
Ivan the Terrible.
That's is another reason that I come to you.
You know him.
You know how he thinks.
You fought against him in Vietnam.
You remember what he did to that village in the Delta.
He's not a soldier, he's a butcher.
If he's in this country, we've gotta get him.
Hannibal, I don't wanna work for this sucker.
But I hate Padavich even more.
You know, Colonel, this jumped off the Art page.
It's a banner headline, four columns.
You said it.
And the key question? How is Ivan gonna start World War Ill? By stealing Abraxas.
A super satellite which can destroy 80% of Russian missiles.
Why the heck can't you just contact the boys in Washington? They would not even acknowledge its existence.
We do not know where it is.
We don't even know what it looks like.
But sources tell us that it will be moved within two days.
This weapon is so secret your government chooses to relocate it every two months.
Clever.
Padavich must have gotten to someone who not only knew where it was but how to make it operational.
But he must move in 36 hours.
We'll want files on Ivan and all of his known associates.
I cannot help you.
lam not even in the country.
But if you need some help you go to Soviet Embassy.
[all exclaiming.]
Then we are on the same side.
For now.
Here is floor plan of Embassy.
You've certainly come prepared.
I anticipate.
All right, here is main entrance.
Here is Consulate General Zamyatin's office.
Here is file room.
This is Padavich in Russian.
What's this small room here? It's infirmary.
How are you feeling, Murdock? I'm fine, why-- [Murdock chattering.]
(Murdock) Downwind! Downwind! [thudding.]
[alarm ringing.]
[man speaking Russian.]
[Murdock groaning.]
(guard) Freeze! Don't move! (Murdock) What are you looking for, a unicide? I'm a victim of gravity.
(Zamyatin) Shut off those bells! Halt! Where are you going? That's our glider, that's our pilot.
What is this? I think this is the Russian Consulate, Coach.
Gee.
Murdock really went off course, when he broke that strut.
[gun cocking.]
He could be hurt.
Comrade, you don't mind if I call you comrade, do you? Good.
Listen, you see with the crosswind (Zamyatin) Who are you? What are you doing here? Get your hands off that equipment.
Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh! Coach.
Coach.
Einstein was right, the strut broke.
Schrodinger, Heisenberg they didn't know what they were talking about.
[sobbing.]
That's why I was out of the zone.
(Hannibal) I can't believe it.
The final round of Point Dume National Gliding Championships.
And we're stuck with a broken strut.
You see, infinity is like an envelope you can stretch it across your eyes put a light behind it, but you can never see the light because it won't travel fast enough.
Yes, he's delirious.
He needs medical attention, Let's get him out of here.
Nyet.
He cannot leave.
This is Soviet property.
He will be detained.
Oh, give me a break.
I mean, look at him.
Does he look like a spy? Why, he's the living personification [screaming.]
of the flying all-American boy.
Yes.
He will be detained along with his equipment.
(Zamyatin) Come with me.
Get hold of our lawyer.
Have him contact the State Department.
Right, Coach.
Kepler was right semi-permeable gases are much stronger downwind.
You see? [camera clicking.]
All the talk about gas, we're forgetting about the unified theory.
We have the strong force and a weak force and there's gravity and there's electromagnetism.
We can't forget about that.
[birds chirping.]
(Hannibal) Make sure he's an expert.
Be sure you get all the bone in the back of his neck.
[machine beeping.]
It's for the glider.
This is an outrage.
The State Department will hear about this.
I have sent for a doctor.
And you will remain here, until we are satisfied that this is all an accident.
Let me tell you something, pal.
President Reagan is a big supporter of hang gliding.
You could be starting an international incident here.
I will take my chances.
You come with me.
[machine beeping.]
I want a report of this as soon as possible.
This has got to be the most aerodynamic airplane Okay, boys.
(guard) Halt! Halt? But my body is aerodynamically perfect and this is the only launchpad in 30 miles.
Strip-search them again.
If they are clean, cut them free.
[screaming.]
How are you, son? Now you see, he's got brain damage.
Oh, get out, you two, I never want to see you again! Get out of here! [Murdock screaming.]
(Dimitri) Was investigation fruitful? Yeah, we got this on Padavich, but we can't read it.
[speaking in Russian.]
Contact this man named Bertka.
His credentials for being a radical is quiet extensive.
Try this on him.
It's a variation of sodium pentothal.
It's not only truth serum but, if induced, can also cause temporary amnesia.
Peppermint, my favorite flavor.
Be careful.
If you use too much, act like laughing gas.
(Katrina) Shasti, are you ready to go now? (Face) Shasti? (Hannibal) What's going on? lam afraid she must turn herself in to Consulate.
Short defection, huh? No, Face, that's not the way it happened at all.
She was kidnapped by the CIA.
She was tortured, escaped and then ended on the front steps of the Consulate.
(Hannibal) What will they do to her, Dimitri? Well, since she is star of ballet troupe I do not feel she will suffer any consequences.
Can you guarantee that? Yes, I can.
Listen, I'm sorry about last night.
So am I.
[door opening.]
Well, I hope you'll be all right.
Face, the clock's ticking.
I hope all of you will be all right.
[door closing.]
[clock ticking.]
Once we've penetrated the perimeter we'll proceed to the centermost building here.
There we'll place a single explosive charge at the centre of the steel door.
(Bertka) The fuse will be set for six seconds.
Once the door is blown, we'll take our positions here, here, and here.
Situated in these positions we should be able to hold the entire area secure.
Very good.
White team.
White team will proceed into the structure and liberate this corridor.
(Padavich) Nyet.
Nyet.
[gun cocking.]
The only way we succeed is if we all carry out the plan precisely.
There can be no mistakes.
All personnel will be taken here and neutralized.
At which point, my team Red team moves into the central chamber and gains control of Abraxas.
Now I want you to go over every detail of phase two in your minds.
We are less than 24 hours away from attacking.
Bertka.
Remember, tomorrow you're meeting Panchow.
He is the key.
With him, we can bring this country to its knees.
You can trust me, Mikhail.
I know.
[clock ticking.]
Bull Fulbright.
I'm Lean.
SIA.
In charge of special operations in covert anti-radical procedures, West Coast.
Well, what brings the company down here to my shore? In the past 24 hours there's been a defection of a Russian ballerina [typewriter keys clicking.]
that ended in a KGB shoot-out and a dramatic rise in intelligence reports on the movements of radicals.
Sounds to me like you had a very busy morning.
I'm just dying to know how I fit into your commie mumbo jumbo.
Routine surveillance photos taken in front of the Russian Consulate.
(Bull) Smith and Peck.
I thought that might pique your interest.
It appears the A-Team has jumped sides and gone to work for the Russians.
Traitors, huh? I love it.
There's somethings, Lean, that never change.
All right, from here on out, it's shoot to kill.
Thank you.
(Bertka) Hey, what's going on? Who are you guys? (Murdock) Gas company.
We just found a leak underneath this building and three dead bodies, so get out of here, all of you.
[people murmuring.]
Leak? I don't smell anything.
You don't smell-- [exclaiming.]
Listen, I tell you, I wish I had a nickel for every poor slob who never smelled anything.
Gas is like a ghost.
Floating through the air, eating up oxygen and bam! And there you are, lying on the floor with your eyes bulging purple lips.
Really? Can you tell me where the meter is? Nine times out often times that's the culprit.
Sure, it's out here.
[laughing.]
We're looking for Mikhail Padavich.
Can you tell us where he is? [laughing.]
You guys look like mosquitoes.
He's wigging out on us.
You gave him too much of that stuff.
I expected more from a fellow journalist.
What? Have you forgotten the five W's? What, where, when, where Where is Padavich? Why? [laughing.]
Pull around the back.
Bertka will unlock the door.
Go now! That's Ivan, let's go.
I have to be at the Malibu Ranch Market by 5:00.
What? A dozen oranges.
Move to the next stand, three tomatoes.
No more, no less.
Then a bouquet of flowers Sounds like a code.
And that's how you find the big cheese.
[machine gun firing.]
[laughing.]
[tires screeching.]
[shells clinking.]
(Murdock) Bertka was babbling some kind of code before Padavich burst in on us.
He said something about later this afternoon at the Malibu Ranch Market.
Yeah, then a shopping list.
Oranges, tomatoes, flowers.
You remember that Cong captain that we captured in the Nui Kto mountains? Oh, yeah.
Ivan was an advisor in his company.
Precisely.
Remember when we interrogated Ivan he told us how he made contact with people that he met for the first time? Always in a public place and usually in the village market.
And they had a little charade worked out where the contact would go from booth to booth and he'd buy particular items in a certain order.
That way Ivan could identify the contact and see if he was being followed.
We got to get to this guy before Padavich does.
I was sent to meet you.
Shall we? Okay, you talk and you'll live, it's as simple as that, pal.
[people chattering.]
Who are you, anyway? I am deaf, I cannot hear.
Come on, we gotta tell Murdock.
You know, you're very easy to spot and you're quite unaware of the fact that you too are being watched.
Mr.
Panchow? Please, please, not the name.
Not the name.
I hope that your associates are capable of executing their duties better than you.
Follow me, but not to close to my heels.
[van horn honking.]
You must be deaf.
I don't believe it.
Dimitri Shastovich.
We didn't even think he was in the country.
(Bull) Who's the skinny broad? Unless I've missed my guess, that's Katrina Karpov the star of the Russian ballet who defected yesterday.
They must have made her change her mind.
[tires screeching.]
You know, Shastovich goes back a long ways with your A-Team.
Shastovich.
Shastovich.
Shastovich.
Isn't that the name of the guy they captured during the bank robbery in Hanoi? Yeah, they tried to bring him back as a prisoner.
But he never got there.
That's the guy.
At their trial, Smith claimed they were on a ridge just north of the DMZ when Shastovich bolted and jumped about 10 feet onto some rocks.
Broke both legs.
With the enemy on their trail there was no way to carry him out.
Or maybe they just let him go.
[clock ticking.]
That's close enough, B.
A.
[gun cocking.]
[gun fires.]
Welcome Mr.
Panchow.
Are you through with your parlor games? We have a lot of work to do.
You just take care of the laser we'll handle the rest.
He lost his hearing several years ago but he can read lips quite well, now.
[speaking Russian.]
Let's go.
Looks like Russian, spelled phonetically.
[ringing.]
Dimitri, I need a translation.
It's phonetic.
Sounds like Yucca Yar Sierra Doroga pyatt mele posle Acton.
It's Yucca Canyon, Sierra Highway, five miles past Acton.
Got you.
Let's go.
In an hour Abraxas will be ours.
Then this world will be a different place.
Let's go.
Stick to this ridge and stay above them.
(Bull) Freeze! Or I'll drop you where you stand.
You're not gonna believe this, General.
[birds chirping.]
This time, Smith, I truly got you.
A half a dozen men being led by a Russian military expert.
They're trying steal something called Abraxas.
Abraxas? What do you know about Abraxas? That it's a laser.
But it won't be ours very long, if we don't move fast.
Forget it, Smith.
We got your man, Shastovich.
We know you're working for the Russians.
We're not working for the Russians.
We are working with them.
That's a subtle distinction.
Not really.
Shastovich came to us for help to stop a Russian colonel who's gone over the edge and wants to start World War Ill.
That's ridiculous.
Maybe not.
Abraxas is the code name for a killer satellite that's located not far from here.
When the system is in place, it's capable of destroying 80% of Russia's missiles while they're still in outer space.
And we have a man, who has infiltrated the radicals.
So, what's it gonna be, gentlemen? Okay, Smith, it's your show.
No way, Lean.
I'll leave two men here, to take care of these people.
We're gonna go in and get those clowns ourselves.
We'll go as a unit.
Under one condition.
When this is over, you drop your weapons and you surrender to me.
[birds chirping.]
Agreed.
[guns firing.]
[Hannibal chattering.]
I'll take the right.
Count to two and then you take the left.
You got it.
Let's go.
Get in, come on.
[machine guns firing.]
[alarm blaring.]
Who are you? A man with many friends and they're all outside.
Take your men and join Bertka, hold them off.
You're gonna have to carry this out of here.
[machine guns firing.]
Careful.
Put it there.
You are going to drive this through the wall.
Man, I'm in the risk pool already.
They're gonna cancel my policy.
Shut up.
Do as I say.
[alarm continues blaring.]
[explosions.]
[grunting.]
[grunting.]
[groaning.]
Are you all right, Colonel? Yeah, I'm all right.
How about you? Well, I won't be doing my jeté for this week.
I twisted my knee, I think.
Here.
Tie that creep to a tree and then take off.
We'd give ourselves up, General but remember what Ulysses Grant once said "There are no promises in war, just strategies.
" I thought you'd feel that way, Colonel.
I'm glad you understand.
You know what General Fulbright says? [guns cocking.]
"The opera ain't over till the fat lady sings.
" It's ironic, huh, guys? Every time we try to serve our country, we end up behind bars.
Yeah, thanks to Dimitri.
I don't think he sold us out, B.
A.
He's not the type.
So how does it feel to heave the A-Team's duffel bag under your bunk? Piece of cake.
I don't understand Becker's problem trying to run these clowns down.
[machine guns firing.]
Drop your weapons! You're not gonna get away with this, you commie flake.
Do not intend to.
15 minutes.
My men and I will surrender our weapons.
But if you try to stop the A- from escaping before then I will kill you.
That is promise.
Nice working with you, General.
Now what's gonna happen to you, Dimitri? Diplomatic immunity.
They put me on plane, send me back to Soviet Union.
I'll retire in dacha outside of Moscow and write my memoirs.
Too bad nobody's ever gonna get to read them.
Might be the story of the century.
Why don't you do it for me, my friend? You are a journalist.
And thank you, Colonel.
Sure pal.
Here, have a cigar.