Gintama (2005) s04e15 Episode Script
If It Works Once, It'll Work Over And Over Again
[You never thought the day would come.]
[Live-Action GinTama!.]
[Up next!!.]
Man After making it to our fourth year, I've gotten to the point where I want to throw up every week in April, y'know? [Note: One cours refers to three months of scheduling.
In practice, 13 episodes.
.]
Next thing I know, one cours is up and done.
We managed to continue on despite all the pain and suffering.
We had to walk home from the station while holding in a big one, but we somehow managed to make it out of the shopping district.
But y'know It's a long ways getting home from the shopping district.
I wanted to give up when we passed by the park.
The whole "Just use a public bathroom" idea started to sound pretty tempting.
Oh, not that there's anything wrong with using a public bathroom.
But it's all about overcoming the temptation and reaching the washlet bathroom at home.
Right, Shinpachi? Huh? Gin-san? Is that Gin-san? That's right.
It's Gin-san.
Uh, what is this? What do you mean? This is GinTama.
Same GinTama time.
Same GinTama channel.
The same old GinTama.
Uh, doesn't this seem a little different? Oh, is this live-action?! When did GinTama turn into a live-action show?! What?! They're mannequins?! Ah, I thought someone told you.
We're going to become an anime that transcends anime.
Starting this week, we'll be showing "Live-action GinTama Revolution: Love will save Hollywood.
" [Note: Parody of the movie "Dragon Ball Evolution.
".]
We are not! This will leave Shueisha in Titanic status! [Note: Parody of the movie "Titanic.
".]
A surreal world anime with thirty minutes of talking mannequins.
"Oh! Gintamikey.
" [Note: Parody of mannequin comedy show "Oh Mikey!" aka "The Fuccons.
".]
No, this can't be considered anime anymore.
These are just still-frame photos! Well, this is basically what happened.
We tried a number of different detours and then someone said "Ah, that's right.
We haven't tried doing live-action yet.
" So we're doing this on the whim of the staff.
Got it, Shinpachi? Seriously? I was expecting 20th Century Box to show up behind us.
[Note: Parody of 20th Century Fox.
.]
Right, Shinpachi? Geez, why do you purposely take these risks? It's pretty damn scary.
You're such a spoilsport, Shinpachi.
That's why you can never stop being Shinpachi.
Learn your lesson already, Shinpachi.
Uh, what's that even supposed to mean? And why am I just a pair of glasses?! Okay, it's starting to rain, so we'll move indoors.
This show is pretty damn random.
We're going to visit Sunrise's fifth studio where they make the GinTama anime.
Excuse us, murder license.
[Note: Parody of manga "Murder License Kiba".
Shueisha title serialized in Super Jump.
.]
Oh.
This is where they make the GinTama anime.
Looks like a dirty place.
This is what is known as the modern-day sweatshop.
No, it isn't! Don't ruin their reputation! What if everybody believes you?! There isn't much difference.
This is a modern-day sweatshop.
Cancer Beam! [Note: Parody of GUNDAM W.
anime created by Sunrise.
.]
There's no cancer or beam involved here.
The boss is going to be pissed at you! Uh, Kagura-chan? What's with the horns on your head? They're antennas.
Starting today, I'm the digital conversion mascot, Digi-Kagura.
[Note: Parody of Chidejika (Digital deer), Japan's official mascot to promote transition to Digital terrestrial television.
.]
That's a complete rip-off! Okay.
Then I'll pitch in.
Don't take your clothes off! What the hell is this scene?! This is nowhere near acceptable for showing on TV! Then we'll move on to today's main topic.
All analog broadcasting will end in July of After that, analog televisions without a digital tuner will be unable to receive a signal.
There you have it.
Huh? That's it? This was just another digital TV ad, wasn't it? Why do I have to catch a cold this time of year? I'm completely out of sync with the rest of the world.
Is my body in 15 no Yoru or what? [Note: "15 no Yoru" (Night at 15) is a Yutaka Ozaki song.
.]
I feel like I'm racing along on a stolen motorcycle.
[Note: A lyric from "15 no Yoru"(Night at 15).
A song about an unruly teenager"s life.
.]
Hello.
Are you okay, Gin-san? Honestly How could you catch a cold this time of year? Hell if I know.
My body went off and picked up some hitchhiking germs from who knows where.
Y'know? Since my body's all kind and considerate.
Don't let that hitchhiking germ spread to me.
In any case, a cold in this season can be a real pain.
You have to take good care of yourself or you won't get better.
Gin-chan.
I made some rice porridge.
Eat this and get better soon.
No, he's going to be feeling a different kind of sick if he eats all that.
That isn't even a normal portion size.
Guess I have no choice then.
I'll help out.
Are you sure you don't just want to eat it yourself?! This just sucks.
I feel so crappy that I don't even care anymore.
How can you say that after a little cold? Think back.
That newtype influenza was much worse.
Influenza? That's right.
This cold is nothing compared to that.
Yes Compared to that ["If It Works Once, It'll Work Over and Over Again".]
[Winter.]
The current outbreak of influenza in Edo is believed to be a newtype virus from Planet Onishi.
[Note: Onishi was the first GinTama manga editor.
.]
We expect the outbreak to get extensively worse.
Everyone please take care of yourselves.
Sis, I'm coming in.
Yes It's starting to snow.
We'll probably have some accumulation.
Are you okay, Sis? Let me know if you're cold.
I made some rice porridge.
Eat plenty so you get better soon.
Th-Thanks, Shin-chan.
I'll be fine now, so go to work.
Ah, it's fine.
I just called and he was like, "You're probably infected already so don't bother coming, you sicko.
" Honestly, that Gin-san It's so terrible of him to call you a sicko.
They were probably trying to be considerate.
That's not possible.
There probably isn't any work.
I'll take the day off.
I also let "Hostess Club Smile" know that you'd be taking the day off.
I can look after you the entire day.
But it would be terrible if you caught my cold.
Don't worry.
It's my turn to take care of you.
You look kind of happy.
Ah, uh Sorry.
That's not it.
I'm sorry.
It's disrespectful to feel this way when you're suffering.
It's just that, well, we haven't had a chance to be alone like this in a while.
I-I'm really sorry.
Honestly, you're so hopeless, Shin-chan.
Then I guess I'll depend on you today.
Will you listen to my whims? Y-Yes! You can ask for anything! I'll do it all.
Ah, then I'll go get some more water! It's dangerous to run.
I'll be right back so sit tight.
Yes? Eh? I caught a cold.
It hurts My head is splitting I'll probably I'll probably feel better if I eat some rice porridge No, you gotta add egg.
Pretty sure I won't get better without rice porridge with egg and takuan [Note: Takuan is a traditional Japanese pickle made from daikon radish.
.]
Uh, why did you come all the way to my place? Shouldn't you rest at home if you're sick? Why did you come here? Don't be so cold.
Neither of us can move.
Like, you know, in DQ when a party of jesters have been paralyzed.
[Note: Parody of Dragon Quest III video game.
.]
[Jesters - Helpless beings that just play around during battle.
But, they never run out of laughs; they're just creepy, popular guys!.]
Jesters? That's a strange analogy, but in the game, jesters have their minds paralyzed the second they go on a journey.
[Kintoki suddenly collapses! Kintoki: *Snore Snore* He somehow manages to breathe normally! Kintoki: Ahh Ahh I can't move.
Kintoki is bound by evil spirits.
.]
We used the last of our strength to make it here.
There can't be much difference between looking after one person or two or three.
I leave the rest to you, Mecha Doc.
[Note: Spoof of manga "Yoroshiku Mecha Doc" (Mechanical Doctor).
Serialized in Shonen Jump in the 80s.
.]
Uh, this isn't a church or inn or anything.
[Note: Parody of game "Dragon Quest.
".]
You won't restore HP or recover from status effects by staying in a commoner's house.
My body is burning I'm gonna die It hurts I might I might get better if I eat some ice cream All you've been thinking about is food! Shin-chan, I'll give you a hand, so let's make rice porridge for everyone.
No, no! You just rest! Aren't you sick? But I can't just lie down in this situation.
You fool! Don't push yourself! Your cooking will lead to death! For us! You should take better care of yourself! That's right.
We just want Sis to live.
We're not asking for anything else.
You two care about me that much? Fine! I get it! I just have to do it, right?! I just have to take care of all three of you, right?! S-Sorry Could you make it four? Sorry Could you add another one? I didn't think it'd be so contagious I came here to take care of Otae-san, but now I'm being taken care of! The biggest mistake I've ever made! But I'm so happy to contract a virus from Gin-san! Wreck me hard, why don't you? Have your way with me, Ginfluenza! What are you talking about?! This virus is from Otae-san! Violate me, Taefluenza! Harder, Ginfluenza! Squeal, Taefluenza! Indulge yourself, Ginfluenza! Deeper, Taefluenza! It burns! It burns! You're too damn loud! You sickos wanted to take care of them, my ass! You were just stalking them! Why do I have to take care of stalkers?! Calm down, Shinpachi-kun.
It's long been said that you'll recover from a cold if you give it to someone else, yeah? I intended to sacrifice my body to save Otae-san Sis, you okay? She isn't any better! She's even worse because the air's all contaminated now! Why do all these people have to gather at our house?! Nobody will get any better with this much virus concentrated in one place! It's fine, Shin-chan.
Sis! Everybody feels lonely when they're sick, like they're the only one suffering in the world.
It feels reassuring to have so many sick people in the same room.
What are you talking about, Sis?! These people are sick in a different way! Their way of life is fundamentally sick! That's right! I'm infected by the disease known as Gin-san! I can't leave him, until death do us part! What?! That means I'm infected by an incurable disease called Otae-san! I won't be able to leave her after I'm dead! Couldn't you people at least pretend to deny it? Shin-chan We may fight all the time, but we're all sick and in the same boat now.
Let's work hard together to beat this cold.
Yes, Otae-san.
Let's work hard together, Otae-san! We'll get better and run around the fields like we used to! When did that ever happen? There's a folk remedy I'd like to try.
It involves this green onion Ah, green onions are supposed to be effective against coughs and phlegm.
My mom wrapped one around my throat when I was a kid.
So what are we going to do? Otae-san! How much longer do I have to keep this up?! Until your fever's gone and you're frozen stiff.
Sis, he's going to die.
That should help clear up the air.
But the air's too dry.
The virus is going to multiply.
That's it.
I'll water the yard.
Otae-san?! The snow turned into rain?! Sis, he's really going to die.
Hey Could you shut the door? It's cold.
I can't stop shivering.
Oh, you're cold? Then I'll sleep with you.
Huh? You're supposed to lie naked together when it's cold.
Ah, wait, hold Gin-san? Wait, Gin-san! Y-You can't! Not that I don't want to But you can't! Not here! They're all watching! This This Makes me so excited! Gin-san! Do whatever you want! Shinpachi, don't let any more sick people in.
Uh That was really important to me Th-That's! A large amount of virus is sneaking in through the door cracks! O-Otae-chan I'm here to see how you're doing Now we have someone whose very existence could be considered a virus! Huh? Oh? What's this? You guys are here, too? What's this? You're all sick together? Honestly You're such a weak bunch.
I'm used to living on the streets, that's why I'm fine as you can see.
What the hell?! You just threw up blood! You've got something worse than a cold! As you can see, I'm just fine.
I don't feel cold at all when I'm practically naked.
He's wearing the virus.
He's posing with the virus like it's a winter trend! This is just a small token, but please eat it together and get better.
It's a Nagoya delicacy What is this stuff covering the Uiro?! [Note: Uiro is a steamed cake from Nagoya.
.]
Are you trying to poison us?! We appreciate the thought, now scram.
I'm feeling worse.
Don't be like that.
Zura-chi said he'd drop by later.
We can all chat together.
Huh? Katsura-san? Give me a break already.
Don't bring any more virus in here! Don't worry.
Despite his looks, Zura's tougher than I am.
He doesn't catch colds.
That may be true, but just think, Gin-san.
Kondo-san is here.
Won't it be a problem if he and Katsura-san see each other? Man, it's working! It's really working, Otae-san! I'd say it's having more of a spiritual effect than a physical one! Since I almost lost my dignity as a human being! Oh my I'm surprised to hear that Kondo-san had any dignity to begin with.
In any case, it would be bad for Katsura-san to show up right now.
You have a point.
Excuse me! Shoot! We're too late! Oh, you're here.
Over here! Over here! Zura-chi! I'm not Zura-chi.
I'm Ill Smith.
[Note: Wordplay of actor "Will Smith" and "Virus.
" Japanese pronunciation of "Virus" sounds like "Wills.
".]
He's not just sick! He's turned into Ill Smith! He's obviously been infected! Since he's Ill Smith! Sick to his very genes! And who the hell is Ill Smith?! How pathetic of you all to catch colds.
Yes, we can.
[Note: Parody of President Obama's campaign slogan.
.]
What country are you the president of? "Yes, we can," he says.
His character's so random.
That's totally somebody else.
You were infected by this virus because of the sloppy lifestyle you lead.
Yes, we can.
I don't want to hear that from someone who's sick to his very genes! An unbreakable will leads to the prevention of colds.
Can you celebrate? [Note: Title of popular song by Namie Amuro.
.]
What are you saying? Did the virus get his brain? Well, I doubt the half-gorilla will recognize him with that face.
Y-You're right.
Huh? But that's odd.
Katsura-san's infected to his very genes, yet he looks perfectly fine.
And there isn't any virus around him.
Hey! Look at that! That's! The virus around Hasegawa-san is vanishing! Could it be?! Katsura-san is absorbing Hasegawa-san's virus?! I-I see Damn Zura I thought he never caught colds because his body resisted viruses, but it's the opposite.
His body absorbs viruses, which means his immune system was strengthened to the point where he can never catch a cold! That's why he became Ill Smith.
Which means M-My body I feel better.
Th-This is Huh? A-Amazing He cured everybody's cold in no time.
I-It's like he's Yes, we can.
A messiah A messiah sent from the heavens to save us from the virus.
Katsura-san, I mean, Ill Smith You were actually helpful! Otae-san! The green onions worked! My fever's completely gone! It's amazing! You're so amazing! You should all give it a try! Come on! That's! All of the pent-up virus is blowing out his ass! Oh It was just a dream That's a relief.
Yes, we can.
That was a tough ordeal! Right? Like hell! What's with the forced flashback?! Why did the flashback start with the opening and finish with the ending?! The eyecatch was even part of the flashback! Didn't you screw up the timing for starting and ending the flashback?! We can't do anything about that.
This chapter was in JUMP in February Volume 10.
Don't mouth off to me! Don't snap at me! And this was too much of a stretch! [The End.]
[Preview.]
Why? Why you? That's what I should be saying, dimwit.
Shut up! Zip it, mayo baldie! No, you shut up, poop curls! The next episode "Two Is Better Than One! Two People Are Better Than One!" Man, that's good.
That's good.
We managed to make it through this week somehow.
At this rate, we'll make it through the fourth year in no time.
That won't do, Kagura.
We're only through one cours.
If we relax now, we won't be able to make it to the washlet toilet at home.
I don't think I can hold on another three seasons.
Forget it.
I'll just go right here.
So why am I just a pair of glasses? [Welcome to Anime Town.
It's just outside the Kami-Igusa train station.
.]
[Note: "Ai Senshi" was an ending theme from the GUNDAM anime.
.]
[By the way, the song the music box plays at noon is "Ai Senshi" (Soldiers of Sorrow).
.]
[See you next time.
.]
[Live-Action GinTama!.]
[Up next!!.]
Man After making it to our fourth year, I've gotten to the point where I want to throw up every week in April, y'know? [Note: One cours refers to three months of scheduling.
In practice, 13 episodes.
.]
Next thing I know, one cours is up and done.
We managed to continue on despite all the pain and suffering.
We had to walk home from the station while holding in a big one, but we somehow managed to make it out of the shopping district.
But y'know It's a long ways getting home from the shopping district.
I wanted to give up when we passed by the park.
The whole "Just use a public bathroom" idea started to sound pretty tempting.
Oh, not that there's anything wrong with using a public bathroom.
But it's all about overcoming the temptation and reaching the washlet bathroom at home.
Right, Shinpachi? Huh? Gin-san? Is that Gin-san? That's right.
It's Gin-san.
Uh, what is this? What do you mean? This is GinTama.
Same GinTama time.
Same GinTama channel.
The same old GinTama.
Uh, doesn't this seem a little different? Oh, is this live-action?! When did GinTama turn into a live-action show?! What?! They're mannequins?! Ah, I thought someone told you.
We're going to become an anime that transcends anime.
Starting this week, we'll be showing "Live-action GinTama Revolution: Love will save Hollywood.
" [Note: Parody of the movie "Dragon Ball Evolution.
".]
We are not! This will leave Shueisha in Titanic status! [Note: Parody of the movie "Titanic.
".]
A surreal world anime with thirty minutes of talking mannequins.
"Oh! Gintamikey.
" [Note: Parody of mannequin comedy show "Oh Mikey!" aka "The Fuccons.
".]
No, this can't be considered anime anymore.
These are just still-frame photos! Well, this is basically what happened.
We tried a number of different detours and then someone said "Ah, that's right.
We haven't tried doing live-action yet.
" So we're doing this on the whim of the staff.
Got it, Shinpachi? Seriously? I was expecting 20th Century Box to show up behind us.
[Note: Parody of 20th Century Fox.
.]
Right, Shinpachi? Geez, why do you purposely take these risks? It's pretty damn scary.
You're such a spoilsport, Shinpachi.
That's why you can never stop being Shinpachi.
Learn your lesson already, Shinpachi.
Uh, what's that even supposed to mean? And why am I just a pair of glasses?! Okay, it's starting to rain, so we'll move indoors.
This show is pretty damn random.
We're going to visit Sunrise's fifth studio where they make the GinTama anime.
Excuse us, murder license.
[Note: Parody of manga "Murder License Kiba".
Shueisha title serialized in Super Jump.
.]
Oh.
This is where they make the GinTama anime.
Looks like a dirty place.
This is what is known as the modern-day sweatshop.
No, it isn't! Don't ruin their reputation! What if everybody believes you?! There isn't much difference.
This is a modern-day sweatshop.
Cancer Beam! [Note: Parody of GUNDAM W.
anime created by Sunrise.
.]
There's no cancer or beam involved here.
The boss is going to be pissed at you! Uh, Kagura-chan? What's with the horns on your head? They're antennas.
Starting today, I'm the digital conversion mascot, Digi-Kagura.
[Note: Parody of Chidejika (Digital deer), Japan's official mascot to promote transition to Digital terrestrial television.
.]
That's a complete rip-off! Okay.
Then I'll pitch in.
Don't take your clothes off! What the hell is this scene?! This is nowhere near acceptable for showing on TV! Then we'll move on to today's main topic.
All analog broadcasting will end in July of After that, analog televisions without a digital tuner will be unable to receive a signal.
There you have it.
Huh? That's it? This was just another digital TV ad, wasn't it? Why do I have to catch a cold this time of year? I'm completely out of sync with the rest of the world.
Is my body in 15 no Yoru or what? [Note: "15 no Yoru" (Night at 15) is a Yutaka Ozaki song.
.]
I feel like I'm racing along on a stolen motorcycle.
[Note: A lyric from "15 no Yoru"(Night at 15).
A song about an unruly teenager"s life.
.]
Hello.
Are you okay, Gin-san? Honestly How could you catch a cold this time of year? Hell if I know.
My body went off and picked up some hitchhiking germs from who knows where.
Y'know? Since my body's all kind and considerate.
Don't let that hitchhiking germ spread to me.
In any case, a cold in this season can be a real pain.
You have to take good care of yourself or you won't get better.
Gin-chan.
I made some rice porridge.
Eat this and get better soon.
No, he's going to be feeling a different kind of sick if he eats all that.
That isn't even a normal portion size.
Guess I have no choice then.
I'll help out.
Are you sure you don't just want to eat it yourself?! This just sucks.
I feel so crappy that I don't even care anymore.
How can you say that after a little cold? Think back.
That newtype influenza was much worse.
Influenza? That's right.
This cold is nothing compared to that.
Yes Compared to that ["If It Works Once, It'll Work Over and Over Again".]
[Winter.]
The current outbreak of influenza in Edo is believed to be a newtype virus from Planet Onishi.
[Note: Onishi was the first GinTama manga editor.
.]
We expect the outbreak to get extensively worse.
Everyone please take care of yourselves.
Sis, I'm coming in.
Yes It's starting to snow.
We'll probably have some accumulation.
Are you okay, Sis? Let me know if you're cold.
I made some rice porridge.
Eat plenty so you get better soon.
Th-Thanks, Shin-chan.
I'll be fine now, so go to work.
Ah, it's fine.
I just called and he was like, "You're probably infected already so don't bother coming, you sicko.
" Honestly, that Gin-san It's so terrible of him to call you a sicko.
They were probably trying to be considerate.
That's not possible.
There probably isn't any work.
I'll take the day off.
I also let "Hostess Club Smile" know that you'd be taking the day off.
I can look after you the entire day.
But it would be terrible if you caught my cold.
Don't worry.
It's my turn to take care of you.
You look kind of happy.
Ah, uh Sorry.
That's not it.
I'm sorry.
It's disrespectful to feel this way when you're suffering.
It's just that, well, we haven't had a chance to be alone like this in a while.
I-I'm really sorry.
Honestly, you're so hopeless, Shin-chan.
Then I guess I'll depend on you today.
Will you listen to my whims? Y-Yes! You can ask for anything! I'll do it all.
Ah, then I'll go get some more water! It's dangerous to run.
I'll be right back so sit tight.
Yes? Eh? I caught a cold.
It hurts My head is splitting I'll probably I'll probably feel better if I eat some rice porridge No, you gotta add egg.
Pretty sure I won't get better without rice porridge with egg and takuan [Note: Takuan is a traditional Japanese pickle made from daikon radish.
.]
Uh, why did you come all the way to my place? Shouldn't you rest at home if you're sick? Why did you come here? Don't be so cold.
Neither of us can move.
Like, you know, in DQ when a party of jesters have been paralyzed.
[Note: Parody of Dragon Quest III video game.
.]
[Jesters - Helpless beings that just play around during battle.
But, they never run out of laughs; they're just creepy, popular guys!.]
Jesters? That's a strange analogy, but in the game, jesters have their minds paralyzed the second they go on a journey.
[Kintoki suddenly collapses! Kintoki: *Snore Snore* He somehow manages to breathe normally! Kintoki: Ahh Ahh I can't move.
Kintoki is bound by evil spirits.
.]
We used the last of our strength to make it here.
There can't be much difference between looking after one person or two or three.
I leave the rest to you, Mecha Doc.
[Note: Spoof of manga "Yoroshiku Mecha Doc" (Mechanical Doctor).
Serialized in Shonen Jump in the 80s.
.]
Uh, this isn't a church or inn or anything.
[Note: Parody of game "Dragon Quest.
".]
You won't restore HP or recover from status effects by staying in a commoner's house.
My body is burning I'm gonna die It hurts I might I might get better if I eat some ice cream All you've been thinking about is food! Shin-chan, I'll give you a hand, so let's make rice porridge for everyone.
No, no! You just rest! Aren't you sick? But I can't just lie down in this situation.
You fool! Don't push yourself! Your cooking will lead to death! For us! You should take better care of yourself! That's right.
We just want Sis to live.
We're not asking for anything else.
You two care about me that much? Fine! I get it! I just have to do it, right?! I just have to take care of all three of you, right?! S-Sorry Could you make it four? Sorry Could you add another one? I didn't think it'd be so contagious I came here to take care of Otae-san, but now I'm being taken care of! The biggest mistake I've ever made! But I'm so happy to contract a virus from Gin-san! Wreck me hard, why don't you? Have your way with me, Ginfluenza! What are you talking about?! This virus is from Otae-san! Violate me, Taefluenza! Harder, Ginfluenza! Squeal, Taefluenza! Indulge yourself, Ginfluenza! Deeper, Taefluenza! It burns! It burns! You're too damn loud! You sickos wanted to take care of them, my ass! You were just stalking them! Why do I have to take care of stalkers?! Calm down, Shinpachi-kun.
It's long been said that you'll recover from a cold if you give it to someone else, yeah? I intended to sacrifice my body to save Otae-san Sis, you okay? She isn't any better! She's even worse because the air's all contaminated now! Why do all these people have to gather at our house?! Nobody will get any better with this much virus concentrated in one place! It's fine, Shin-chan.
Sis! Everybody feels lonely when they're sick, like they're the only one suffering in the world.
It feels reassuring to have so many sick people in the same room.
What are you talking about, Sis?! These people are sick in a different way! Their way of life is fundamentally sick! That's right! I'm infected by the disease known as Gin-san! I can't leave him, until death do us part! What?! That means I'm infected by an incurable disease called Otae-san! I won't be able to leave her after I'm dead! Couldn't you people at least pretend to deny it? Shin-chan We may fight all the time, but we're all sick and in the same boat now.
Let's work hard together to beat this cold.
Yes, Otae-san.
Let's work hard together, Otae-san! We'll get better and run around the fields like we used to! When did that ever happen? There's a folk remedy I'd like to try.
It involves this green onion Ah, green onions are supposed to be effective against coughs and phlegm.
My mom wrapped one around my throat when I was a kid.
So what are we going to do? Otae-san! How much longer do I have to keep this up?! Until your fever's gone and you're frozen stiff.
Sis, he's going to die.
That should help clear up the air.
But the air's too dry.
The virus is going to multiply.
That's it.
I'll water the yard.
Otae-san?! The snow turned into rain?! Sis, he's really going to die.
Hey Could you shut the door? It's cold.
I can't stop shivering.
Oh, you're cold? Then I'll sleep with you.
Huh? You're supposed to lie naked together when it's cold.
Ah, wait, hold Gin-san? Wait, Gin-san! Y-You can't! Not that I don't want to But you can't! Not here! They're all watching! This This Makes me so excited! Gin-san! Do whatever you want! Shinpachi, don't let any more sick people in.
Uh That was really important to me Th-That's! A large amount of virus is sneaking in through the door cracks! O-Otae-chan I'm here to see how you're doing Now we have someone whose very existence could be considered a virus! Huh? Oh? What's this? You guys are here, too? What's this? You're all sick together? Honestly You're such a weak bunch.
I'm used to living on the streets, that's why I'm fine as you can see.
What the hell?! You just threw up blood! You've got something worse than a cold! As you can see, I'm just fine.
I don't feel cold at all when I'm practically naked.
He's wearing the virus.
He's posing with the virus like it's a winter trend! This is just a small token, but please eat it together and get better.
It's a Nagoya delicacy What is this stuff covering the Uiro?! [Note: Uiro is a steamed cake from Nagoya.
.]
Are you trying to poison us?! We appreciate the thought, now scram.
I'm feeling worse.
Don't be like that.
Zura-chi said he'd drop by later.
We can all chat together.
Huh? Katsura-san? Give me a break already.
Don't bring any more virus in here! Don't worry.
Despite his looks, Zura's tougher than I am.
He doesn't catch colds.
That may be true, but just think, Gin-san.
Kondo-san is here.
Won't it be a problem if he and Katsura-san see each other? Man, it's working! It's really working, Otae-san! I'd say it's having more of a spiritual effect than a physical one! Since I almost lost my dignity as a human being! Oh my I'm surprised to hear that Kondo-san had any dignity to begin with.
In any case, it would be bad for Katsura-san to show up right now.
You have a point.
Excuse me! Shoot! We're too late! Oh, you're here.
Over here! Over here! Zura-chi! I'm not Zura-chi.
I'm Ill Smith.
[Note: Wordplay of actor "Will Smith" and "Virus.
" Japanese pronunciation of "Virus" sounds like "Wills.
".]
He's not just sick! He's turned into Ill Smith! He's obviously been infected! Since he's Ill Smith! Sick to his very genes! And who the hell is Ill Smith?! How pathetic of you all to catch colds.
Yes, we can.
[Note: Parody of President Obama's campaign slogan.
.]
What country are you the president of? "Yes, we can," he says.
His character's so random.
That's totally somebody else.
You were infected by this virus because of the sloppy lifestyle you lead.
Yes, we can.
I don't want to hear that from someone who's sick to his very genes! An unbreakable will leads to the prevention of colds.
Can you celebrate? [Note: Title of popular song by Namie Amuro.
.]
What are you saying? Did the virus get his brain? Well, I doubt the half-gorilla will recognize him with that face.
Y-You're right.
Huh? But that's odd.
Katsura-san's infected to his very genes, yet he looks perfectly fine.
And there isn't any virus around him.
Hey! Look at that! That's! The virus around Hasegawa-san is vanishing! Could it be?! Katsura-san is absorbing Hasegawa-san's virus?! I-I see Damn Zura I thought he never caught colds because his body resisted viruses, but it's the opposite.
His body absorbs viruses, which means his immune system was strengthened to the point where he can never catch a cold! That's why he became Ill Smith.
Which means M-My body I feel better.
Th-This is Huh? A-Amazing He cured everybody's cold in no time.
I-It's like he's Yes, we can.
A messiah A messiah sent from the heavens to save us from the virus.
Katsura-san, I mean, Ill Smith You were actually helpful! Otae-san! The green onions worked! My fever's completely gone! It's amazing! You're so amazing! You should all give it a try! Come on! That's! All of the pent-up virus is blowing out his ass! Oh It was just a dream That's a relief.
Yes, we can.
That was a tough ordeal! Right? Like hell! What's with the forced flashback?! Why did the flashback start with the opening and finish with the ending?! The eyecatch was even part of the flashback! Didn't you screw up the timing for starting and ending the flashback?! We can't do anything about that.
This chapter was in JUMP in February Volume 10.
Don't mouth off to me! Don't snap at me! And this was too much of a stretch! [The End.]
[Preview.]
Why? Why you? That's what I should be saying, dimwit.
Shut up! Zip it, mayo baldie! No, you shut up, poop curls! The next episode "Two Is Better Than One! Two People Are Better Than One!" Man, that's good.
That's good.
We managed to make it through this week somehow.
At this rate, we'll make it through the fourth year in no time.
That won't do, Kagura.
We're only through one cours.
If we relax now, we won't be able to make it to the washlet toilet at home.
I don't think I can hold on another three seasons.
Forget it.
I'll just go right here.
So why am I just a pair of glasses? [Welcome to Anime Town.
It's just outside the Kami-Igusa train station.
.]
[Note: "Ai Senshi" was an ending theme from the GUNDAM anime.
.]
[By the way, the song the music box plays at noon is "Ai Senshi" (Soldiers of Sorrow).
.]
[See you next time.
.]