Phineas and Ferb s04e16 Episode Script

Okay, gang.
Today, we're gonna tie a legendary knot.
Whoa, whoa, whoa! We're just startin'?! No— No intro, nothin'?! Just gettin' right into it? Yep, we're just doin' the knot.
Wait, how can we do something not? No, it's "knot" spelled with a "k".
I didn't think it was spelled with a "k".
No.
It's "knot" spelled with a "k".
It's "knot" spelled with a "k".
I don't understand your pauses.
Let me start over.
Today, we're going to reproduce the Gordian Knot.
Well, why didn't you say so in the first place? I've heard of that, but I can't remember the story.
I got this.
Back in the day where men wore miniskirts Wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle.
Alexander the Great was vacationing in Gordium, when he came upon a celebrated oxcart that was tied to a post using a knot that was so complicated, it was impossible to untie.
So he just sliced it in half in one bold stroke.
A simple solution to a complicated problem, hence the phrase, "Cutting the Gordian Knot.
" I've never heard that phrase! That is new to me.
Trust me, it's a thing.
So, we'll tie these ropes around our waists, follow this blueprint to recreate it, then it's up to us to figure out how to get loose.
That will make us the second people to tie the Gordian Knot, but the first people to untie it! What if we cannot untie it? No problem.
Our mom was always really good with knots.
There was this one time when Candace— Hey! I thought we weren't going to bring up the clothesline incident ever again! Oh, right.
Anyway, would you mind getting Mom if we get stuck in the ginormous Gordian Knot we're making? When it gets big and weird, I'll go get Mom.
Excellent! Does everyone have their ropes tied? All right, let see.
Isabella and Buford, make two loops where you're standing.
Great! You're good to start climbing.
Baljeet, turn twice counterclockwise and then dive in five loops from the bottom.
Then Ferb and I will do this and this and this, and we'll join you inside.
Shall we? Absolutely.
Let's go, bro! Baljeet and Ferb, twist to the right and wiggle towards the top.
Hey, where's Perry? Morning, Agent P! Seems that Dr.
Doofenshmirtz has been hitting every all-you-can-eat buffet in town, which can't be good! And if anything were to happen to Doofenshmirtz, we would have to make some drastic cuts over here! Especially in the non-essential personnel department.
Good luck, Agent P.
Oh, don't worry about the mess, uh Carl will take care of it.
I guess that makes me essential, huh? Don't get cocky, Carl.
Hey, Candace.
Hi, Jeremy.
What a nice surprise! Ooh, what's that? Oh, it's an old mini safe of mine that I found in the back of my closet.
I've had it for ages, but I haven't used it in so long that I forgot the combination.
I thought your brothers could open it.
I figured that's a "safe" bet.
So, what's in it? That's the thing.
I don't remember.
Maybe it's a rare baseball card.
No, I sold all those a long time ago.
Um, could it be your favorite toy car from when you were a kid? No, I traded that for this safe.
Well, maybe it's something cute, like your baby teeth.
Nope.
Definitely not.
I still got those.
Ew.
I mean, cute! Yeah, the Tooth Fairy never visited me when I was a kid.
Anyway, could you give this to your brothers? I gotta rush to work.
Sure.
I'll give it to them as soon as they finish their Ferbian Knot.
Don't ask.
See you later, alligator! In a while, crocodile! You guys have got to work on your pet names for each other.
So what's in the safe? I don't know.
But it's not baby teeth.
Okay, everybody.
Two twists to the left and we should all see daylight.
Well, I just earned my Overcoming Claustrophobia Patch! Ugh! Daylight! Now what? Now we burrow back in and untie ourselves.
You gotta be kiddin' me! Who looked at this idea and said, "Yeah, that'd be fun"? You see?! This is what happens when we have no intro! I have been making mental notes of the paths and probabilities as I have gone along.
It will be a piece of cake.
If I just walk backwards, it should work.
To heck with this game! I'm just gonna chill here for a while.
Hey! Who's pullin' on my rope?! Over here, Perry the Platypus.
I'm just having a little lunch.
Why don't you pull up a chair and join me? What do you think? Pretty clever, right? It's my new high chair trap! I thought of a high chair 'cause you're just a little guy.
Aren't'cha? Yes, you are.
You're just a little guy.
Hey, you're not getting outta this so why don't you enjoy the food? It's All-You-Can-Eat, you know.
Y-You're good? You're already full, right? Me, too.
I barely touched my plate.
That's how these all-you-can-eat places make their money.
They charge you like you're gonna eat a week's worth, but then, when you fill up after, like, two plates, t-they've really made a profit.
That's why I'm opening up my own All-You-Can-Eat Drusselsteinian buffet! Look.
I've already made a commercial for it.
All-You-Can-Eat Drusselsteinian Buffet! It's food the way your mother never made! We've got Hassenfloffer Entrail Waterzooi, with Gopher Gut Au Gratin! Fuzzy Fungus Flugelbrotchen! And an assortment of tripe-based desserts! And those brave enough can try our new Mystery Lump! Remember, "Doof" spelled backwards is "fooD"! You know, come to think of it, it really should be called the All-You-Can-Stand, because Drusselsteinian food is terrible! That's the beauty of it.
Nobody will be able to finish even one plate's worth! My profit margin will be huge! But, first, I've got to eliminate the competition, with this the Eat-It-All-Inator! You see, it gives people a huge appetite, so everyone will eat so much that all of these All You Can Eat places will go out of business! Then my restaurant will be packed! Maniacal laughter.
What do you suppose it is? It's probably some dumb boy stuff like firecrackers or turtle shells.
Or maybe it's his secret inner thoughts written as a sonnet.
No, no, no, no, that's not it! I gotta think more like my brothers.
You know, use my imagination.
This could be dangerous.
Maybe it's a secret spy plan.
Or a glass eye! Or Abraham Lincoln's beard! Now, just watch what happens when I zap those people over there.
Huh? What happened? How could I miss? Oh, I'm so hungry all of a sudden! Oh, that was great! I– I can cut out the middleman and do all the eating myself! I'm going down for seconds.
How can you eat like that and stay so thin? Oh, I built an All-You-Can-Eat-inator that speeds up your metabolism so you don't gain any weight no matter how much you eat, ever.
You should mass produce that machine! Everyone would buy one! You'd be a millionaire! Don't worry about me making money, mister! I-I've got a complicated plan.
I– Like I'm gonna take advice from some guy in a diner.
(Song: Gordian Knot) There's a legend I've heard, or so it's been taught 'Bout Alexander the Great and the Gordian Knot Looked it up on the net so that we could recreate it Now the knot we have here is quite complicated It's got closed bends, loop splices, bowlines and lashings Maybe we can loosen it with just a little thrashing Square knots, sheepshanks and all kinds of hitches When it comes to constraint, there's an embarrassment of riches It's already a knot, so ready or not We're gonna try to untie it, though it's terribly taut So it won't be for naught, we'll give it all that we've got To untie the un-untieable knot We don't know what it is, but we know what it's not It's not a Gutenberg press or a coffee pot It's not a car or a tractor 'cause the safe's too small And a fish or a piano wouldn't make sense at all It's already a knot, so ready or not We're gonna try to untie it, though it's terribly taut So it won't be for naught, we'll give it all that we've got To untie the un-untieable knot To untie the un-untieable knot To untie the un-untieable Not even close! Not even close! That's it, I'm gettin' the boys.
Doo bee doo bee doo bah Perry! Looks like we've all got just a few more moves to get untied.
Except for Buford, who's managed to tie himself into a knot.
I'm a victim o' circumstance.
Phineas and Ferb, you've gotta open this safe and tell me what's inside! It's drivin' me crazy! Sure.
We'd love to.
As soon as we finish untying the Gordian Knot.
Alright, it's big and weird.
Ma! In a minute, Candace! Doo bee doo bee doo bah doo Ha! You're too late, Perry the Platypus! Buffet Number Two is history! I am starting to feel a little full though.
Hmm.
I thought it would last more than a few minutes.
Better give myself a little boost.
That's more like it! Wow, I am so hungry, I could eat everything at Buffet Number Three, baby! Yeah! Oh, give up, Perry the Platypus, those chairs are– Oh, man, I swallowed my inator.
Oh, well, at least you can't destroy it now, because it's inside my stomach.
So, today, I win! Okay, you broke it.
I can feel all the little pieces just rumbling around in there.
I'm starving! What's that sweet smell? Probably licorice.
We used it to make the ropes as a failsafe in case Mom wasn't around.
Perfect! Wow, I never knew Candace was such a licorice fan.
Hey, thanks.
I am so in love with her right now.
What? Nothin'.
That's a solution to the Gordian Knot that even Alexander the Great wouldn't have come up with.
Alright, Candace, what am I looking at? I ate it! It was the size of the house and I ate it! You ate it? I know, I don't believe it either! Well, what is that? It's a safe.
I can't open it.
Gimme that thing! I got an opener that can open anything! ¡Para usted, señorita! (For you, miss!) A pencil? This is what I've been obsessed with all day, a pencil?! Oh, I remember that! In grade school, a pretty girl loaned me that pencil and I've kept it ever since.
A pretty girl? Who was she? Candace, that pretty girl was you.
See, those are your teeth marks.
Okay, Candace.
You can eat the rest of that pencil.
Unless you'd like to join us all for some chocolate triple layer cake.
Yay! Ugh! Ugh Oh, there you are, Perry! Hey, my baby teeth just fell out! Why don't you put 'em in here? Ew.
I mean, cute!