Gintama (2005) s04e21 Episode Script
If You Keep Copying, They Will Retaliate / A Loss Opens Your Eyes to the Love You Have
[Unofficial Mobile Suit Gundam 30th Anniversary Special.]
Commander.
What is it? Will this be our target? You've got it.
But how could such a house You have no idea, do you? Meaning? The shabbier a house looks, the more money its owners have stashed away.
[Note: Parody of Ramba Ral's line in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
Is that how it works? This is such a drag.
Why Ramba Ral? You're free to pretend to be someone else, but don't drag me into it Got a problem? N-No Then get to work! We'll finish this in five minutes! Sir! ["You'll Get Sued If All You Do is Copy Others".]
Ouch Huh? Ral-sama? I mean, Nanba-san? Huh? That's weird Nanba-san What was the meaning of that?! Don't underestimate the battlefield! You almost gave me a scare for a moment there! [Note: Parody of Jean's line in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
This guy's shaking in his boots.
Wait, Clamp! [Note: Clamp is vice-chief in Ramba Ral's unit in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
It's Matsuda You're being too careless.
If you don't shape up, you'll die in no time! R-Right Recite them! Huh? I'm telling you to recite the three principles I taught you! F-Forgive me Uh First! Avoid contact with unnecessary objects, to leave a minimal trail! Second! Never touch anything that isn't worth any money! And last of all! You must conceal your identity.
That's right.
I have been able to survive on this battlefield by following these three principles! Never forget them! Sir! Understood! That's good.
Let's begin! There we are Wait, Acous! [Note: Acous is an officer in Ramba Ral's unit in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
No, it's Matsuda.
Somebody's coming! Hide! Sakata-san.
Is the owner back? I'm not sure.
But our only option right now is to wait and see.
Sakata-san! Sakata-san? Useless Sakata-san? Is the Federation mobile suit a m-monster?! [Note: Famous line by Char Aznable from the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
Bring it on Even Lieutenant Commander Char [Note: Char Aznable from the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
I've come to collect the rent.
Four life forms detected.
However, it appears that Master Gintoki isn't here.
I shall return later.
She escaped? Or should I say that she let us escape And yeah, this is a horrible mess.
That woman Is something wrong? I'm bothered by what she just said.
Huh? She said there were four life forms in this room.
Assuming that the first is We can forget it.
The second would be Ral-sama.
The third would be myself.
There's one extra! What is this? [Note: Parody of the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
Is this the new Federation weapon? Since it's white [Note: Gundam is also white.
.]
It's a dog.
No, I realize that it's a dog, but its size is Its size is not important right now! No, it's pretty important.
Don't worry.
I prepared a little something for dealing with watchdogs.
Here it is! Th-That's Come on, puppy.
It's a yummy cracker.
Now be a good boy [Note: Cozun is an officer in Ramba Ral's unit in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
Cozun, you okay? It's Matsuda And I'm definitely not okay I was careless I, Ramba Ral, forgot about the battle in the heat of battle Can we go home now? Hey, Gin-san! Gin-san, you here? Reinforcements?! Please don't notice us Gin-san What? He's taking somebody else's food! I-Impossible! He's using someone else's house like it's his own?! Looks like Gin-san isn't here, so I'll leave for today.
[Note: Stetch is a corporal in Ramba Ral's unit in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
Can you believe it, Stetch? It's Matsuda.
It would be difficult to imitate his hopelessness.
Uh, we've already broken two of your three principles.
Let's retreat What are you doing here? No, we're ["'Sup!".]
I see.
Is Gintoki around by any chance? No, Gintoki-san isn't I see.
Then I have no choice We haven't said anything yet! Incidentally Who are you people? Uh, well Wait, I've seen your faces before.
What are you talking about? It must be your imagination.
That voice [Call the police if you see these faces!.]
Hmm? Is there something on my face? It's just your imagination.
That's it! I know! That voice is definitely Mi**** Mouse! [Note: Parody of "Mickey".
Disney strictly enforces copyright laws in Japan as well.
.]
Or his voice.
[Note: Parody of "Donald Duck".
Disney strictly enforces copyright laws in Japan as well.
.]
And that one is Do**ld.
There are so many things I could say in return! This is no good, Ral-sama! I can see time itself! [Note: Parody of a famous line by Lalah Sune from the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
Ignore him, Zeygan.
[Note: Zeygan is a member in Ramba Ral's unit in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
It's Matsuda.
He's living in a dream land.
We will carry out our mission with our bare hands if we must! I'm Kotaro Katsura! Nice to meetcha! It's no good.
He's already got his mind set.
[Note: Original term "Oniko(demon child)", which is a term used to describe a child who doesn't look like their parents.
Also used in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
A real screwball.
***key and friends Just the thought is lifting my spirits.
What's wrong with this house? Only freaks are showing up.
You don't say Times have changed.
These people are beyond our comprehension A tough bunch However I like you, kid.
[Note: Parody of Ramba Ral's line in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
You're able to speak your mind.
What? Don't tell me Yes, why don't you join us? Are you serious? We happen to be short on hands.
I am so grateful! Then let us Yeah, what are you people doing in my house without permission? Eek! ["Welcome home.
".]
Gintoki, great timing! Guess what? And who are those guys? We've been one-upped, Hamon.
[Note: From "Crowley Hamon", an aide and lover to Ramba Ral in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
It's Matsuda.
You've got good eyes.
[Note: Parody of Ramba Ral's line in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
Uh, people usually tell me that I have the eyes of a dead fish.
[Note: Parody of Ramba Ral's line in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
And you've got guts.
I really like you.
[Note: Parody of Ramba Ral's line in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
Uh, I have no idea what you're talking about now.
That's Ral-sama for you.
He's changing the subject without actually saying anything so he can confuse us! Your name's Gintoki, I believe? [Note: Parody of Ramba Ral's line in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
I'll be imposing.
I'm sure you can support it.
Gin-san! Those people are burglars! Well done, boy.
But you didn't win on your own.
[Note: Parody of Ramba Ral's line in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
You won thanks to that stalker of yours Everybody get the hell out! Mi**** *****! Huh? Who? Shut up, baldie! I definitely drank too much My head's killing me Fine.
I'll wake up.
I get it.
I'll take a bath to get the alcohol out of my system.
I feel so much better Huh? Uh, what? What? No, no way.
No way at all.
I have more hair than the average person.
I've got curly hair, so this could never happen.
I have so much hair that I ask the barber to thin it for me.
Must be my imagination.
It's possible that I was pulling out my hair when I was drunk last night Wha Wha Wha What the hell?! ["You Don't Know What You've Got Till It's Gone".]
Something's funny here.
What's going on here?! Definitely not right here.
What the hell is this here?! Enough with the here hear hair! Is that some kind of That That scam? [Note: Parody of "Ore Ore scam".
It was well known scam to act like member of family saying "It's me, It's me!(Ore Ore)" to have their parents deposit money in certain bank account.
.]
Ah, Kagura-chan.
This here is weird.
This here is bad! Here, here, here! What's here? Right here! Huh? Kagura-chan? Your head What are you talking about? I mean, your hair I know, I'm standing right here.
What the hell?! Those buns were hiding such a horrific secret?! They fell off the other morning.
Now, I can just clip them on.
No, that's not what I meant That must be from your dad.
You know, that patch that.
Now you've switched to the that dat that.
[Note: Parody of "Ore Ore scam".
.]
Is that a different scam? No, I'm talking about your genes.
Shouldn't that there have something to do with your dad there? Good grief.
Now you've switched to the that there bare.
The that there scam? You can't fool this old lady by changing a few words around! This isn't a scam! Keep pretending to be my son.
But this mother knows the truth! You damn imposter! Reveal your true identity! Stop it! Now is the wrong time! Seriously! Stop! Good morning.
Shinpachi! Perfect timing! What's going on at such an early hour? Yeah, there's a big problem.
Me and Kagura's hair Ow What's that? You and Kagura-chan are here.
That's not what I mean! I'm losing my hair! What? You're losing your hearing? Yeah, somebody's definitely losing their hearing You're pretending to lose your hearing now?! You're going to scam medical expenses from us! Goddamn it! Cut it out already! You can threaten me all you want! This mom won't send any money! Just calm down, you two.
I'll go make some tea.
Uh, Shinpachi-kun? Yes? What's wrong, Gin-san? What, Kagura-chan? Wha?! Wha Wha What the hell?! And there you have it.
So we're holding an emergency Odd Jobs meeting.
If anyone knows of a good solution to deal with the current situation, please speak up.
Yes! Okay, Shinpachi-kun.
Something's wrong here! How could we all go bald together There must be a reason for this? Yes, you.
Don't use any words that directly refer to the condition.
This is a delicate issue.
Try to be more subtle.
Okay There must a reason for this.
We should start by looking for the cause Yep, denied.
Why? We can figure that out later.
There is one thing we must do right now! Defend the final line of defense at all costs while pushing back, inch by inch! Ooh! Ooh! Gin-chan! Leave it to me! Is this the time to be laughing at other people?! Didn't you look in the mirror?! You look like Buffaloman without the horns! [Note: One of the characters from Kinnikuman (Ultimate Muscle).]
And you look like a half-assed Atlantis! [Note: One of the characters from Kinnikuman (Ultimate Muscle).]
That's fine! Atlantis is way stronger than Robin Mask! [Note: One of the characters from Kinnikuman (Ultimate Muscle).]
[Note: Akuma Choujin are a group of characters from Kinnikuman (Ultimate Muscle).]
Buffaloman is the only Akuma Choujin that isn't a side character! Hey, should you really be saying that? If you keep it up, I'm going to launch these pom-poms! Launch these buns into Shinobazu Pond.
[Note: Shinobazu Pond is a pond located in Ueno Park in Tokyo.
.]
Stop that! Why are the two of you fighting amongst yourselves?! And leave the Akuma Choujin out of this! Weren't we going to work together to find a solution?! What's that, Patchy? Do you have a good idea, Patchy? Stop calling me Patchy! It hurts my feelings! What's this? One of the great tools of our civilization that your father probably used as well.
A scalp massage brush.
It stimulates the scalp to increase hair growth.
We'll slowly tap our hair back.
Let's give it a go.
Ready and We're tapping our hair away! What the hell is this?! The impact from each tap is making more hair fall out! This isn't stimulation! This isn't hair growth! This is bad.
At this rate [Pause.]
We'll end up like this Isn't that bad for the main character of a JUMP anime series? Your hair makes you look like a side character.
We're all going to end up like Krillin soon enough! [Note: Bald headed character from Dragon Ball.
.]
There's no future for an anime where you can't distinguish between characters by their silhouettes.
No, it might be considered original.
An anime where everybody has the same hairstyle.
No, you can't have a show where everybody's Krillin.
You might want to get off your high horse there.
Considering how you're in the Krillin position, thinning Patchy! What's wrong with Krillin?! He can use the Destructo Disk! [Note: Krillin's technique.
.]
Vegeta was so worried that he yelled at Nappa to get out of the way! [Note: Vegeta and Nappa are both characters from Dragon Ball.
.]
Calm down, Madallin.
[Note: Madara (Patchy)+ Krillin.]
What's with that half-assed name?! That's why it's perfect for Shinpachi.
You're really You're really hurting my feelings It doesn't matter if this happens to Shinpachi, but, you wouldn't want Krillin as Gin-san, the lead.
Hey, Kagura.
Think of something.
Just forget it! Let's all go bald together! You'll be free to choose your own hairstyle then! What do you mean? That should be obvious.
You just have to wear it.
[Pause.]
Like this? Uh, there are so many issues I could point out But yeah, something like that.
Me too, then! ["Katsura" (also means "Wig").]
[Pause.]
Woo-hoo! I look so cute! Uh, you people aren't even taking your characters into consideration, are you? Zip it.
Huh? [Pause.]
Hold on! Why am I the only one stuck with that Ultimate Muscle crap?! Weak.
Too weak.
Wigs don't come that cheap.
Huh? It costs over 500,000 yen to get one custom-made, and requires constant maintenance.
[Note: Tomoaki Ogura (Announcer) and Kimimaro Ayanokoji (Comedian) and Pancha Ito(Baseball commentator).
.]
And there are examples like O****-san, Kimi****, and Pan*** whose wigs can be spotted a mile away.
Really? That's setting the bar high.
Wait! We have to do something about this hair now! If we let it grow in a spiral like this for three years You're so greedy.
Don't get so worked up about showing off what little hair you have left.
This granny hates rotten people like you! Kids should shut up and get a buzz cut! You go first, Madaluxe! [Note: Patchy + Luxe(hair styling line).]
Calm down, Kagura! Please stop! Patchy is better than nothing at all! The less you have, the more precious it feels! Then I'll start with Gin-chan! Don't mess with me! You just broke through my final line of defense! I'll turn you into a patchy too! Do it if you can! If you do that to the heroine, the show will have to be canceled! Who are you calling the heroine?! I'll turn you into a mascot like Sento-kun! [Note: Sento-kun is mascot character of a special event in Nara, Japan in 2010.
.]
You can cover your head with curry! [Note: Curry Cook, one of the characters from Kinnikuman, has curry on his head.
.]
Gotcha! What kind of hair would you like today, miss? Hey! Guys! Stop it! Zip it, Madallin! Why was that line in unison?! We're taking you with us! Enough of that.
Granny.
Honestly I knew this would happen.
Tama.
Yes.
We have a report from the scene.
Ana Ketsuno! Ana Ketsuno! Yes, this is Ketsuno reporting live from the scene.
The sudden outbreak of hair loss in the Kabuki District has been resolved.
The cause was a virus brought by an Amanto from Planet Namihei.
[Note: Namihei is a character from Sazae-san.
He only has one hair on his head.
.]
The Bakufu is distributing a special cure after identifying the virus.
Gin-san! Okay! Let's go to the hospital! As you can see, an extremely long line has formed for the cure.
However, the Bakufu has announced that their supply will soon run out, and they will need three months to produce enough for everybody infected.
Gin-san! What do we do?! Three months with this head Means we'll see this.
This show will turn into a crappy anime without a heroine.
Hey.
Can't you see this?! [Heal (parody of RPGs).]
Oh? Could it be? I asked a doctor I happen to know.
If you want this, get down on your knees.
And from now on, you better call me Catherine-sama Hey.
I'll be cured if I drink that, right? Meow! Hand it over! Sadaharu! Wait! Hold on! You ["Let's Employ 'Candy or the Whip'".]
Interrogation? I like it.
Really brings out my sadistic side.
[Prisoner #3-2034, Kohei Tanaka.]
[A murderous monster, who will never confess to his crimes, is being interrogated by Shinsengumi members.
.]
[See you next time.
.]
Commander.
What is it? Will this be our target? You've got it.
But how could such a house You have no idea, do you? Meaning? The shabbier a house looks, the more money its owners have stashed away.
[Note: Parody of Ramba Ral's line in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
Is that how it works? This is such a drag.
Why Ramba Ral? You're free to pretend to be someone else, but don't drag me into it Got a problem? N-No Then get to work! We'll finish this in five minutes! Sir! ["You'll Get Sued If All You Do is Copy Others".]
Ouch Huh? Ral-sama? I mean, Nanba-san? Huh? That's weird Nanba-san What was the meaning of that?! Don't underestimate the battlefield! You almost gave me a scare for a moment there! [Note: Parody of Jean's line in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
This guy's shaking in his boots.
Wait, Clamp! [Note: Clamp is vice-chief in Ramba Ral's unit in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
It's Matsuda You're being too careless.
If you don't shape up, you'll die in no time! R-Right Recite them! Huh? I'm telling you to recite the three principles I taught you! F-Forgive me Uh First! Avoid contact with unnecessary objects, to leave a minimal trail! Second! Never touch anything that isn't worth any money! And last of all! You must conceal your identity.
That's right.
I have been able to survive on this battlefield by following these three principles! Never forget them! Sir! Understood! That's good.
Let's begin! There we are Wait, Acous! [Note: Acous is an officer in Ramba Ral's unit in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
No, it's Matsuda.
Somebody's coming! Hide! Sakata-san.
Is the owner back? I'm not sure.
But our only option right now is to wait and see.
Sakata-san! Sakata-san? Useless Sakata-san? Is the Federation mobile suit a m-monster?! [Note: Famous line by Char Aznable from the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
Bring it on Even Lieutenant Commander Char [Note: Char Aznable from the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
I've come to collect the rent.
Four life forms detected.
However, it appears that Master Gintoki isn't here.
I shall return later.
She escaped? Or should I say that she let us escape And yeah, this is a horrible mess.
That woman Is something wrong? I'm bothered by what she just said.
Huh? She said there were four life forms in this room.
Assuming that the first is We can forget it.
The second would be Ral-sama.
The third would be myself.
There's one extra! What is this? [Note: Parody of the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
Is this the new Federation weapon? Since it's white [Note: Gundam is also white.
.]
It's a dog.
No, I realize that it's a dog, but its size is Its size is not important right now! No, it's pretty important.
Don't worry.
I prepared a little something for dealing with watchdogs.
Here it is! Th-That's Come on, puppy.
It's a yummy cracker.
Now be a good boy [Note: Cozun is an officer in Ramba Ral's unit in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
Cozun, you okay? It's Matsuda And I'm definitely not okay I was careless I, Ramba Ral, forgot about the battle in the heat of battle Can we go home now? Hey, Gin-san! Gin-san, you here? Reinforcements?! Please don't notice us Gin-san What? He's taking somebody else's food! I-Impossible! He's using someone else's house like it's his own?! Looks like Gin-san isn't here, so I'll leave for today.
[Note: Stetch is a corporal in Ramba Ral's unit in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
Can you believe it, Stetch? It's Matsuda.
It would be difficult to imitate his hopelessness.
Uh, we've already broken two of your three principles.
Let's retreat What are you doing here? No, we're ["'Sup!".]
I see.
Is Gintoki around by any chance? No, Gintoki-san isn't I see.
Then I have no choice We haven't said anything yet! Incidentally Who are you people? Uh, well Wait, I've seen your faces before.
What are you talking about? It must be your imagination.
That voice [Call the police if you see these faces!.]
Hmm? Is there something on my face? It's just your imagination.
That's it! I know! That voice is definitely Mi**** Mouse! [Note: Parody of "Mickey".
Disney strictly enforces copyright laws in Japan as well.
.]
Or his voice.
[Note: Parody of "Donald Duck".
Disney strictly enforces copyright laws in Japan as well.
.]
And that one is Do**ld.
There are so many things I could say in return! This is no good, Ral-sama! I can see time itself! [Note: Parody of a famous line by Lalah Sune from the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
Ignore him, Zeygan.
[Note: Zeygan is a member in Ramba Ral's unit in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
It's Matsuda.
He's living in a dream land.
We will carry out our mission with our bare hands if we must! I'm Kotaro Katsura! Nice to meetcha! It's no good.
He's already got his mind set.
[Note: Original term "Oniko(demon child)", which is a term used to describe a child who doesn't look like their parents.
Also used in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
A real screwball.
***key and friends Just the thought is lifting my spirits.
What's wrong with this house? Only freaks are showing up.
You don't say Times have changed.
These people are beyond our comprehension A tough bunch However I like you, kid.
[Note: Parody of Ramba Ral's line in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
You're able to speak your mind.
What? Don't tell me Yes, why don't you join us? Are you serious? We happen to be short on hands.
I am so grateful! Then let us Yeah, what are you people doing in my house without permission? Eek! ["Welcome home.
".]
Gintoki, great timing! Guess what? And who are those guys? We've been one-upped, Hamon.
[Note: From "Crowley Hamon", an aide and lover to Ramba Ral in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
It's Matsuda.
You've got good eyes.
[Note: Parody of Ramba Ral's line in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
Uh, people usually tell me that I have the eyes of a dead fish.
[Note: Parody of Ramba Ral's line in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
And you've got guts.
I really like you.
[Note: Parody of Ramba Ral's line in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
Uh, I have no idea what you're talking about now.
That's Ral-sama for you.
He's changing the subject without actually saying anything so he can confuse us! Your name's Gintoki, I believe? [Note: Parody of Ramba Ral's line in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
I'll be imposing.
I'm sure you can support it.
Gin-san! Those people are burglars! Well done, boy.
But you didn't win on your own.
[Note: Parody of Ramba Ral's line in the anime series "Mobile Suit Gundam".
.]
You won thanks to that stalker of yours Everybody get the hell out! Mi**** *****! Huh? Who? Shut up, baldie! I definitely drank too much My head's killing me Fine.
I'll wake up.
I get it.
I'll take a bath to get the alcohol out of my system.
I feel so much better Huh? Uh, what? What? No, no way.
No way at all.
I have more hair than the average person.
I've got curly hair, so this could never happen.
I have so much hair that I ask the barber to thin it for me.
Must be my imagination.
It's possible that I was pulling out my hair when I was drunk last night Wha Wha Wha What the hell?! ["You Don't Know What You've Got Till It's Gone".]
Something's funny here.
What's going on here?! Definitely not right here.
What the hell is this here?! Enough with the here hear hair! Is that some kind of That That scam? [Note: Parody of "Ore Ore scam".
It was well known scam to act like member of family saying "It's me, It's me!(Ore Ore)" to have their parents deposit money in certain bank account.
.]
Ah, Kagura-chan.
This here is weird.
This here is bad! Here, here, here! What's here? Right here! Huh? Kagura-chan? Your head What are you talking about? I mean, your hair I know, I'm standing right here.
What the hell?! Those buns were hiding such a horrific secret?! They fell off the other morning.
Now, I can just clip them on.
No, that's not what I meant That must be from your dad.
You know, that patch that.
Now you've switched to the that dat that.
[Note: Parody of "Ore Ore scam".
.]
Is that a different scam? No, I'm talking about your genes.
Shouldn't that there have something to do with your dad there? Good grief.
Now you've switched to the that there bare.
The that there scam? You can't fool this old lady by changing a few words around! This isn't a scam! Keep pretending to be my son.
But this mother knows the truth! You damn imposter! Reveal your true identity! Stop it! Now is the wrong time! Seriously! Stop! Good morning.
Shinpachi! Perfect timing! What's going on at such an early hour? Yeah, there's a big problem.
Me and Kagura's hair Ow What's that? You and Kagura-chan are here.
That's not what I mean! I'm losing my hair! What? You're losing your hearing? Yeah, somebody's definitely losing their hearing You're pretending to lose your hearing now?! You're going to scam medical expenses from us! Goddamn it! Cut it out already! You can threaten me all you want! This mom won't send any money! Just calm down, you two.
I'll go make some tea.
Uh, Shinpachi-kun? Yes? What's wrong, Gin-san? What, Kagura-chan? Wha?! Wha Wha What the hell?! And there you have it.
So we're holding an emergency Odd Jobs meeting.
If anyone knows of a good solution to deal with the current situation, please speak up.
Yes! Okay, Shinpachi-kun.
Something's wrong here! How could we all go bald together There must be a reason for this? Yes, you.
Don't use any words that directly refer to the condition.
This is a delicate issue.
Try to be more subtle.
Okay There must a reason for this.
We should start by looking for the cause Yep, denied.
Why? We can figure that out later.
There is one thing we must do right now! Defend the final line of defense at all costs while pushing back, inch by inch! Ooh! Ooh! Gin-chan! Leave it to me! Is this the time to be laughing at other people?! Didn't you look in the mirror?! You look like Buffaloman without the horns! [Note: One of the characters from Kinnikuman (Ultimate Muscle).]
And you look like a half-assed Atlantis! [Note: One of the characters from Kinnikuman (Ultimate Muscle).]
That's fine! Atlantis is way stronger than Robin Mask! [Note: One of the characters from Kinnikuman (Ultimate Muscle).]
[Note: Akuma Choujin are a group of characters from Kinnikuman (Ultimate Muscle).]
Buffaloman is the only Akuma Choujin that isn't a side character! Hey, should you really be saying that? If you keep it up, I'm going to launch these pom-poms! Launch these buns into Shinobazu Pond.
[Note: Shinobazu Pond is a pond located in Ueno Park in Tokyo.
.]
Stop that! Why are the two of you fighting amongst yourselves?! And leave the Akuma Choujin out of this! Weren't we going to work together to find a solution?! What's that, Patchy? Do you have a good idea, Patchy? Stop calling me Patchy! It hurts my feelings! What's this? One of the great tools of our civilization that your father probably used as well.
A scalp massage brush.
It stimulates the scalp to increase hair growth.
We'll slowly tap our hair back.
Let's give it a go.
Ready and We're tapping our hair away! What the hell is this?! The impact from each tap is making more hair fall out! This isn't stimulation! This isn't hair growth! This is bad.
At this rate [Pause.]
We'll end up like this Isn't that bad for the main character of a JUMP anime series? Your hair makes you look like a side character.
We're all going to end up like Krillin soon enough! [Note: Bald headed character from Dragon Ball.
.]
There's no future for an anime where you can't distinguish between characters by their silhouettes.
No, it might be considered original.
An anime where everybody has the same hairstyle.
No, you can't have a show where everybody's Krillin.
You might want to get off your high horse there.
Considering how you're in the Krillin position, thinning Patchy! What's wrong with Krillin?! He can use the Destructo Disk! [Note: Krillin's technique.
.]
Vegeta was so worried that he yelled at Nappa to get out of the way! [Note: Vegeta and Nappa are both characters from Dragon Ball.
.]
Calm down, Madallin.
[Note: Madara (Patchy)+ Krillin.]
What's with that half-assed name?! That's why it's perfect for Shinpachi.
You're really You're really hurting my feelings It doesn't matter if this happens to Shinpachi, but, you wouldn't want Krillin as Gin-san, the lead.
Hey, Kagura.
Think of something.
Just forget it! Let's all go bald together! You'll be free to choose your own hairstyle then! What do you mean? That should be obvious.
You just have to wear it.
[Pause.]
Like this? Uh, there are so many issues I could point out But yeah, something like that.
Me too, then! ["Katsura" (also means "Wig").]
[Pause.]
Woo-hoo! I look so cute! Uh, you people aren't even taking your characters into consideration, are you? Zip it.
Huh? [Pause.]
Hold on! Why am I the only one stuck with that Ultimate Muscle crap?! Weak.
Too weak.
Wigs don't come that cheap.
Huh? It costs over 500,000 yen to get one custom-made, and requires constant maintenance.
[Note: Tomoaki Ogura (Announcer) and Kimimaro Ayanokoji (Comedian) and Pancha Ito(Baseball commentator).
.]
And there are examples like O****-san, Kimi****, and Pan*** whose wigs can be spotted a mile away.
Really? That's setting the bar high.
Wait! We have to do something about this hair now! If we let it grow in a spiral like this for three years You're so greedy.
Don't get so worked up about showing off what little hair you have left.
This granny hates rotten people like you! Kids should shut up and get a buzz cut! You go first, Madaluxe! [Note: Patchy + Luxe(hair styling line).]
Calm down, Kagura! Please stop! Patchy is better than nothing at all! The less you have, the more precious it feels! Then I'll start with Gin-chan! Don't mess with me! You just broke through my final line of defense! I'll turn you into a patchy too! Do it if you can! If you do that to the heroine, the show will have to be canceled! Who are you calling the heroine?! I'll turn you into a mascot like Sento-kun! [Note: Sento-kun is mascot character of a special event in Nara, Japan in 2010.
.]
You can cover your head with curry! [Note: Curry Cook, one of the characters from Kinnikuman, has curry on his head.
.]
Gotcha! What kind of hair would you like today, miss? Hey! Guys! Stop it! Zip it, Madallin! Why was that line in unison?! We're taking you with us! Enough of that.
Granny.
Honestly I knew this would happen.
Tama.
Yes.
We have a report from the scene.
Ana Ketsuno! Ana Ketsuno! Yes, this is Ketsuno reporting live from the scene.
The sudden outbreak of hair loss in the Kabuki District has been resolved.
The cause was a virus brought by an Amanto from Planet Namihei.
[Note: Namihei is a character from Sazae-san.
He only has one hair on his head.
.]
The Bakufu is distributing a special cure after identifying the virus.
Gin-san! Okay! Let's go to the hospital! As you can see, an extremely long line has formed for the cure.
However, the Bakufu has announced that their supply will soon run out, and they will need three months to produce enough for everybody infected.
Gin-san! What do we do?! Three months with this head Means we'll see this.
This show will turn into a crappy anime without a heroine.
Hey.
Can't you see this?! [Heal (parody of RPGs).]
Oh? Could it be? I asked a doctor I happen to know.
If you want this, get down on your knees.
And from now on, you better call me Catherine-sama Hey.
I'll be cured if I drink that, right? Meow! Hand it over! Sadaharu! Wait! Hold on! You ["Let's Employ 'Candy or the Whip'".]
Interrogation? I like it.
Really brings out my sadistic side.
[Prisoner #3-2034, Kohei Tanaka.]
[A murderous monster, who will never confess to his crimes, is being interrogated by Shinsengumi members.
.]
[See you next time.
.]