Phineas and Ferb s04e22 Episode Script
Druselsteinoween
1 "Druselsteinoween" There's a hundred and four days of summer vacation and school comes along just to end it So the annual problem for our generation is finding a good way to spend it Like maybe Building a rocket, or fighting a mummy or climbing up the Eiffel Tower Discovering something that doesn't exist Hey! Or giving a monkey a shower Surfing tidal waves Creating nano-bots or locating Frankenstein's brain It's over here! Finding a dodo bird Painting a continent Or driving our sister insane Phineas! As you can see, there's a whole lot of stuff to do before school starts this fall Come on, Perry.
So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all! So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all! Mom, Phineas and Ferb are making a Halloween special! - Wow.
Looks great, Dad.
- Why, thank you, boys.
Come on, Ferb, we have work to do.
Nice costume, Dad.
See you after the party.
Oh, yes, you have fun at the Castle Party tonight.
If you need anything, your mother and I will be here scaring the sugar out of the little trick-or-treaters.
Well, how do I look, dear? [MAKES GORILLA SOUNDS.]
Oh, no! A gorilla! Okay, Agent P.
Who do I look like? Huh? What do you think? Oh, come on! Carmen Miranda! You know, you really should watch more old movies.
Carl: Sir, I found your dosimeter.
It was What are you doing? Great googly-moogly! Is that what I look like? Wow.
Suddenly, I feel ridiculous.
- Never mind Carl, you can have it! - Sheesh! Moving right along Sorry you have to work on Halloween, but just get out there and see what Doof has planned.
I'd give you more information, but obviously I've got to find a new costume.
Thanks a lot, Carl.
Monty: Well, hello, Vanessa.
Hey, Monty.
What are you up to? I'm just doing a little freelance for my Dad.
What's up? I happen to be throwing the biggest, baddest Halloween-iest bash ever! It's tonight, and I think you should come.
A costume party? Hey, that means we can actually be seen in public together - and no one will know.
- That's the plan! I'm checking out my Queen of the Vampires costume even as we speak.
- Ooh! - [IN SING-SONG VOICE.]
It's pretty cute.
Great! I'll be there.
I'll be dressed as the Scarlet Pimpernel.
The Scarlet what? You know, he wears a big red hat with a feather in it? You should watch more old movies.
Well, you know it's a little known fact that vampire queens love pumpernels.
- Pimpernel.
- Yeah, whatever, OWCA-boy.
See you tonight.
Sorry, Agent M.
You're on your own from here on out.
[GROANS.]
[DOORBELL RINGS.]
- Oh, goody, trick-or-treaters! - CHILDREN: Trick or treat! Okay, let's see, what do we have here? A class dunce with a fake scar, and you must be the princess of Meatland, and, uh, oh, an upset rooster head.
And what are you supposed to be, a kid in a sheet? A platypus in a sheet.
Perry the Platypus in a sheet! Well, that's perfect! Wait, wait, I was hoping you would Ow! Whoa, whoa, whoa! I'm being sincere.
There's no trap, no inator.
Just come over here.
You've got to see this.
It was delivered today.
I had to sign for it and everything.
Doofenshmirtz: It's a real castle! With with a moat! Who delivers a moat? How do they even get that on a plane? It's from my great Aunt, Henrietta Hakenschpit.
She left it to me in her will.
Look, listen to this.
"To Heinz Doofenshmirtz, you are my only nephew, except for Roger, and I hated him.
" See? See why I liked her? "Therefore I leave you my castle and hidden inside is a very large treasure.
" Huh? And look, there's a little treasure map with clues! Wanna help me? Oh, come on! It'll be fun.
Take off your secret agent hat just for tonight and put on your adventure hat.
That's my guy! Treasure, ho! This is gonna be fun.
Vanessa: Welcome to my Castle Party! Here's a mask.
- Lacey? Wow! Great costume! - This is a costume party? Sir Grant of the Goth Table has arrived.
You look great, Sir Grant.
Goth dragons beware.
- Candace: Vanessa? - Candace.
Whoops! I guess your party is gonna have two vampire queens.
What are the chances, right? Stacy: I'm gonna go change.
How did you ever pull this off? Well, my Dad gave me permission to use his castle and then all I had to do was call the best party planners in town.
Ferb, you go get the four-forty junction box hooked up behind the riser and I'll go check up on the pumpkin crudites.
- Et tu, Vanessa? - I had to! This is a big night for me.
My boyfriend is coming Oh! Here he is right now.
Ooh, a vampire.
It's a good thing I have my neck covered.
You're not my boyfriend.
Whoops.
[CHUCKLES.]
Sorry, I thought you were my - Jeremy, it's me, Candace.
- Ooh, a vampire.
- It's a good thing I have - Yeah, I heard you the first time.
All right, the first clue is in the letter.
Let's see here "My treasure awaits you, keep on the trail.
A ride up the stairs from under a veil.
" What kind of twisted gibberish is this? That's it! Henrietta's chair lift.
Oh, yeah! Here, you can sit here, Perry the Platypus.
No? All right, suit yourself.
We're coming for your treasure, Henrietta [SCREAMS.]
Ha! I got it! [GROWL.]
[SHRIEKS.]
They shipped the alligator, too? Get away, from me, Susan.
We talked about this! Phineas: These scalloped cheese slices should be staged directly across from the crackers, but overall, nice work.
Hey, look at you! You're Isabella-rella.
If I lose a slipper tonight, you know where to find me.
- Oh, that reminds me.
- Oops! Phineas: There's some water on the floor over by the sally port.
Buford, it is so hot in here.
Can I please have some punch? You don't want to drink that.
You know, I think we have the best Castle Party costume.
Carl: Hey, Buford, look at me.
I'm a castle.
At a Castle Party.
Get it? Huh? Huh? Yeah.
Hey, Windsor, your drawbridge is down.
Oh, my! How embarrassing.
Monty should've been here by now.
Finally! Wait Who are you? I'm the Scarlet Pimpernel.
- As am I.
- Same here.
PIMPERNELS: We are all here! [GROANS.]
Stacy: Hey! What's going Oh, for crying out loud! Okay, Ferb, let's kick this biggest, baddest Halloween-iest bash into high gear! [CHEERING.]
We got squirrels in the pants Look at them They're stompin' their feet Look, look at them They're stompin' their feet Look at them They're stomping their feet Stompin' their feet They're stompin' their They're stompin' their It's a spa day Yeah Shiatsu Gesundheit Thank you very much We got a salt scrub, a hot tub What's it gonna be? A foot bath, a facial Aromatherapy It's a spa day Yeah We got squirrels in the pants We got squirrels in the pants I'm Lindana and I wanna, wanna, wanna have fun We got, we got, we got, We got squirrels in the pants "In the dungeon you will find an elevator out of time.
" I really don't remember an elevator down here.
[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS.]
Well, what do you know? How could I have missed it? "In the elevator, to the top you go.
The next clue is down below.
" Well, that doesn't really make a lot of sense.
[ELEVATOR DINGS.]
Why did she make us come all the way up here if the clue is down [SCREAMS.]
[CONTINUES SCREAMING.]
[SPLASH.]
[SCREAMS.]
[GROWLS.]
Wait a second.
Give me that thing.
[SPANISH GUITAR PLAYS.]
Now, that is my boyfriend.
When a vampire queen locks her thirsty eyes on a Pimpernel And the music casts its ghostly spell It's like waving a blood red cape in front of a vampire bull Baljeet: [VOCALIZING.]
And that's a feeling we all know so well I find that I am Haunted by you And you are haunted by me too It's a story as old as time Vampire queens dig Pimpernels - Nice of you to finally show up! - Yeah, you're not gonna believe this, but all the costume shops were out of Pimpernel outfits.
[CHUCKLES.]
Oh, I believe it.
- Oh, what's wrong, Isabella? - I ran out of shoes.
Oh, that's okay, it's more fun to dance barefoot anyway! Stompin' their feet They're stompin' their They're stompin' their, stompin' their [CLANKING.]
Whoops, sorry.
It's all right.
Monty, is that you? With the daughter of my sworn enemy? It can't be! All right, Monty, you've got a lot of Ooh! Oh, hello, Mr.
Water and Power guy.
I, um better check the things.
Yes.
Thanks, Stacy.
I owe you.
No thanks are necessary for that darned elusive Pimpernel! - Where did Monty go? - Oh, he's up there on the window ledge.
Until next time, My Queen.
[BLOWS KISS.]
Wow! That was really kind of swashbuckley.
[GROANS.]
Let's hope she didn't see that.
[DANCE MUSIC PLAYING.]
"By luck or by chance, you found the last clue.
Turn the corner, favorite nephew.
" [STAMMERING.]
What does she mean, "Turn the corner"? It's just a flat wall.
It's a What are you doing, Perry the Platypus? Oh! The corner of her picture.
Give it a turn.
With your little platypus hands, there.
[MACHINERY WHIRRING.]
At last! Whoo-hoo! I'm rich! I am rich! I am comfortably well-off.
Don't worry, Perry the Platypus, I won't forget about you.
You'll be the first person I invite to my next pináta party.
Uh, excuse me, sir.
Are you the owner of this here building? Yes.
This area's not zoned for medieval castles.
You're going to have to pay a penalty fee.
Penalty fee? How much? One canvas bag with a huge dollar sign on it.
Thank you, here's your receipt.
Well, at least I still have all this loot! Danville Water Management Department.
Can I see your permit for that moat? - Bureau of Castle Conservation.
- All right.
- WOMAN 1: Parking fines.
- Doofenshmirtz: Here you go.
- MAN 1: Castle Relocation Authority.
- Doofenshmirtz: Yeah, one for you too.
- MAN 2: Ways and Means.
- Doofenshmirtz: Yeah.
- WOMAN 2: Means and Ways.
- Doofenshmirtz: Take it.
Here, just - MAN 3: Tri-State HOA.
- Doofenshmirtz: Sure.
Why not? MAN 4: Department of Bureaucracy.
[Doofenshmirtz GROANS.]
[DOORBELL RINGS.]
CHILDREN: Trick or treat! Oh, my! Look at all the fun costumes! Here you go.
And here's one for you.
And here's one for the little princess.
And one for you.
Oh, but wait! Don't go away.
[IN SING-SONG VOICE.]
We have little surprise for you! [ROARS.]
[CHILDREN SCREAMING.]
Oh, I do so love Halloween.
We're gonna save a ton of money on candy this year.
"Face Your Fear" Okay, guys.
Now you try it! Nice! Very smooth, Baljeet.
[CLANG.]
- What's the problem, Buford? - Why, you know, the sun was in my eyes.
Buford, what's with the lack of effort? - I'm just trying to be careful.
- You? Yeah, we're out of credit at the emergency room.
My mom said if I break one more bone, she's gonna break the rest of 'em.
Fairly sure that was hyperbole.
Besides, look how hard that hydrant is.
Well, maybe we could make our own fire hydrants out of soft foam rubber.
Hey! That's a great idea! Ferb, I know what we're gonna do today.
Seriously? That's it? A soft fire plug? Well, yeah.
Attached to a giant revolving treadmill with a giant soft neighborhood, containing soft obstacles.
Oh, yeah, okay.
- Where is Perry? - What did you say? I was just asking where Perry is.
- Oh.
- What did you think I said? Uh, well, I thought you said Uh, never mind.
It was too weird.
[ACTION MUSIC.]
[MONOGRAM GRUNTING.]
[GROANING.]
Get it off! Ugh! Sorry, Agent P, I just walked through a spider web.
Don't you just hate that? You spend the rest of the day worried there's a spider on you.
[SHUDDERS.]
Gives me the willies.
Any-hoo, our sources tell us that there's a cowboy hat in front of Doof's building.
Normally, that wouldn't be of any interest to us, because this is the week of the Danville Hootenanny, But it's a rather large hat, and, in spite of its name, the Danville Hootenanny is a dignified affair.
I wish I had more information, but Carl said there was a big bee by the surveillance equipment.
So, get out there, Agent P.
[SHUDDERS.]
Carl, is is there a spider on my head? Carl: No, sir.
There's no spider on your head.
NARRATOR: Meanwhile, at the Danville Space Laboratory MAN: "Laboratory"? [GRUNTING IN FRUSTRATION.]
Oh, Jack, it sure was nice of you to show Candace and me around.
This satellite stuff is very interesting.
No problem, Linda.
I'm flattered you'd be interested in our humble facility, considering your background in astrophysics.
Oh, yeah.
Uh, listen, that's kind of a secret.
- So don't - Oh! Oh, I'm sorry.
- So, what does your father do here? - Oh, he's part of a team that makes and manages reconnaissance satellites.
They actually had a couple of Rovers on Mars earlier this summer.
But they suddenly stopped working.
You wouldn't know anything about that, would you? Uh, how would I, uh [CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY.]
What do you mean? All right, Your Highness.
- [GASPS.]
Who told? - Stacy.
CHORUS: # Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated! # Uh, Perry the Platypus, I bet you're wondering wondering why I'm cowering outside my lab.
Well, the day started like any other day.
You know, I, "How am I going to take over the Tri-State Area," but and I suddenly remembered a movie that I'd seen long ago at a drive-in.
It was called Night of the Felis.
I knew right away that the old masters were onto something.
Imagine, taking something cute and enlarging it to frightening proportions.
Brilliant! But in order to take over the Tri-State Area, I'd have to start with some other type of small animals.
[PEOPLE IN MOVIE SCREAMING.]
Preferably something that could fly.
[CATS IN MOVIE MEWLING.]
And I vowed to get right to work, as soon as the movie was over.
The first thing I needed to do was create an inator that would make things larger.
Huh? I tried it out on my cowboy hat.
It was a success.
My ten-gallon hat had turned into a two thousand-gallon hat.
Whoa! [CRASHING.]
[CAR ALARM WAILING.]
Well, that's the end of that hat.
Next, I had to genetically modify a mouse so it could fly.
[MOUSE SQUEALING.]
[BITING.]
Doofenshmirtz: Ow! Then I decided it would be easier to just use a bat.
So, I ordered a retired stunt bat from a low-budget bat circus that had recently gone belly-up.
You know, the economy.
I was on the precipice of Tri-State Area domination.
At last, I had the ultimate creepy soldier! [SQUEAKS.]
And then I remembered, I had a very mild phobia of bats.
[BAT SQUEAKING.]
[SHRIEKS.]
Get away, get away, get away! I also have a mild phobia of shellfish.
WAITRESS: Here's your order, sir.
Doofenshmirtz: [SHRIEKS.]
Get away, get away, get away! But bats are worse.
Scram, you flying gerbil! [BAT SQUEAKING.]
Am-scray! [SQUEAKING.]
You're making me miss the Hootenanny! [SQUEAKING.]
Sir, I found your radio.
It was embedded in the dashboard of your car.
Norm! Don't just stand there! Do something about this bat! Really? That's your solution? Throw a radio at it.
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Don't throw that.
That's imitatable.
What if I hit it with this? No! No! Wait! Don't shoot him with that! That's my And I thought the bat was scary before, when he was, you know, tiny.
[BAT SHRIEKING MENACINGLY.]
It was at that point that Norm and I decided to come out here.
Plus the bat kind of looks like my cousin, Narthelliot! Which, as you can imagine, is weird for me.
- Isn't that about right, Norm? - It's even more horrible than it looks! Phineas: Everybody got their helmets and boards? - Isabella: Yeah! - Buford and Baljeet: I'm ready! Okay, Ferb, fire it up.
We're going to Foam Town! [WHOOPING.]
[GRUNTS.]
There's nothing that I've found as good as goin' round and round In Foam Town In Foam Town I used to skin my knees [WHOOPING.]
But here it doesn't matter where I fall You'll never get scarred 'cause nothing's really hard In Foam Town So take a rollin' ride on a squeezable urban sprawl Come on down to Foam Town In Foam Town Yeah There's no bruises or concussions There's no painful repercussions There's no braces There's no bandages No hospital stay If you jump and try to land it You can eat it or face-plant it And you know that your insurance plan will not have to pay Come on down to Foam Town Come on down to Foam Town Come on down Just come on down to Foam Town Come on down to Foam Town Yeah! Come on down Come on down to Foam Town And over here are the models of our robotically operated Rovers.
The Mars Rover, the Moon Rover, and this is the Irish Rover.
- You sent a Rover to Ireland? - Well, we had to test it somewhere.
In a land afar in Castlebar Many months ago We sent an Irish Rover To look around, you know With a tur-la-lur-la Fiddle-die-dee And a tur-a-fiddle-die-do In a land afar in Castlebar Many months ago It took a couple of months, but we're finally starting to get some really great pictures back.
Thank you for the blanket, Perry the Platypus.
- Vanessa: Dad? - Vanessa? [WHISPERING.]
Oh, no! Vanessa, get out of there! - There's a huge bat on the loose.
- Really? [SHRIEKING.]
Vanessa: Wow! Cool.
It looks like your cousin, Narthelliot.
[QUIETLY.]
No sudden movements or loud noises, Vanessa.
Dad, relax.
It's just a bat.
They just eat bugs.
But it's a very big bat! Now, come on.
Just, just stand up.
It's okay.
It's time to face your fear.
[BAT GROWLING.]
[NERVOUSLY.]
Well, okay [MUFFLED GROANING.]
Oh, no, no! Bad bat! Spit him out! [GROANS.]
Gross! [SCREAMS.]
Oh, yeah, this is much better! [BAT SHRIEKING.]
Dad! Oh, hey, Perry.
I was wondering if you could help me.
[ENGINE FIRING UP.]
Thanks, Perry.
You're a peach.
So, what did I miss? Oh, hey, Narthelliot! We were just talking about you.
Jack: Of course, even better than using a Rover, we have these.
We call them global surveillance satellites.
No matter where you are on this Earth, there's always one of these flying above you in orbit, streaming live video to us here.
That's right.
Here's the outside of our building, right now.
And we can look up any location, instantly.
The Eiffel Tower, the Taj Mahal So, you could look down on anybody's backyard and just see what they're doing? - Pretty cool, huh? - Wow, that's got to be handy for something.
And three.
Two.
One - What? - Really? All right.
[SHRIEKING.]
[Doofenshmirtz SCREAMING.]
Whoa! Oh, I get it.
This is what it does.
Flying through a hoop.
That's what I get for buying a bat from a defunct bat circus! - So, having fun yet? - Oh, you know I am! You know, my Dad goes on and on about the cafeteria here, and I think he's right.
This food is [SPITTING.]
[GASPS.]
I've got an idea! My brothers are probably building something in our backyard right now, and we can use the surveillance satellite to catch them doing it! Come on! I was wondering how long that would take.
Just let me punch in my address [GASPS.]
Oh, my gosh! I knew it! Look at that thing! - Wow.
What is it? - It's an eye in the sky bust! Come on, let's go get my Mom.
Okay, Ferb, turn it off.
Let's take a little break.
[Buford GRUNTING.]
- You okay, Buford? - I'm having the time of my life! - Is anybody else hungry? - I am! Come on, let's go see what's in the kitchen.
Doofenshmirtz: Oh no! Oh, no, no! Not again! [CLANGING.]
Ow, my head! Ow, my head again! Ow! Now I forgot math.
Ow! There goes Social Studies.
Oh, good! They're back! This way, Mom.
Just see for yourself.
Oh, wow! It's our house! And you can see the boys! And their little skateboards.
Hi, boys! - They can't hear you, you know.
- I know.
Hi! Whoo-hoo! Hey! Foam Town's gone.
You say that like it doesn't happen every day.
And you say that like an angry old prospector.
- What does that even mean? - I stand by that metaphor.
Finally, Daisy, we're here.
Our new home! Lots of elbow-room and no one to bother us.
The last frontier! A place where a man and his donkey can Dang it! Come on, Daisy, we're heading west.
[Doofenshmirtz SCREAMING.]
Perry the Platypus! Welcome to Saint Louis.
Now, do something about this bat, please! [SQUEAKING.]
[YELPS.]
Well, at least I lost my fear of bats.
[CRASHING.]
[GRUNTS.]
WAITRESS: Oh, it's you again.
Doofenshmirtz: [SCREAMING.]
Go away, go away, go away! WAITRESS: Oh, just stop it.
There's nothing that I've found as good as goin' round and round In Foam Town In Foam Town I used to skin my knees [WHOOPING.]
But here it doesn't matter where I fall You'll never get scarred 'cause nothing's really hard In Foam Town So take a rollin' ride on a squeezable urban sprawl Come on down to Foam Town
So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all! So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all! Mom, Phineas and Ferb are making a Halloween special! - Wow.
Looks great, Dad.
- Why, thank you, boys.
Come on, Ferb, we have work to do.
Nice costume, Dad.
See you after the party.
Oh, yes, you have fun at the Castle Party tonight.
If you need anything, your mother and I will be here scaring the sugar out of the little trick-or-treaters.
Well, how do I look, dear? [MAKES GORILLA SOUNDS.]
Oh, no! A gorilla! Okay, Agent P.
Who do I look like? Huh? What do you think? Oh, come on! Carmen Miranda! You know, you really should watch more old movies.
Carl: Sir, I found your dosimeter.
It was What are you doing? Great googly-moogly! Is that what I look like? Wow.
Suddenly, I feel ridiculous.
- Never mind Carl, you can have it! - Sheesh! Moving right along Sorry you have to work on Halloween, but just get out there and see what Doof has planned.
I'd give you more information, but obviously I've got to find a new costume.
Thanks a lot, Carl.
Monty: Well, hello, Vanessa.
Hey, Monty.
What are you up to? I'm just doing a little freelance for my Dad.
What's up? I happen to be throwing the biggest, baddest Halloween-iest bash ever! It's tonight, and I think you should come.
A costume party? Hey, that means we can actually be seen in public together - and no one will know.
- That's the plan! I'm checking out my Queen of the Vampires costume even as we speak.
- Ooh! - [IN SING-SONG VOICE.]
It's pretty cute.
Great! I'll be there.
I'll be dressed as the Scarlet Pimpernel.
The Scarlet what? You know, he wears a big red hat with a feather in it? You should watch more old movies.
Well, you know it's a little known fact that vampire queens love pumpernels.
- Pimpernel.
- Yeah, whatever, OWCA-boy.
See you tonight.
Sorry, Agent M.
You're on your own from here on out.
[GROANS.]
[DOORBELL RINGS.]
- Oh, goody, trick-or-treaters! - CHILDREN: Trick or treat! Okay, let's see, what do we have here? A class dunce with a fake scar, and you must be the princess of Meatland, and, uh, oh, an upset rooster head.
And what are you supposed to be, a kid in a sheet? A platypus in a sheet.
Perry the Platypus in a sheet! Well, that's perfect! Wait, wait, I was hoping you would Ow! Whoa, whoa, whoa! I'm being sincere.
There's no trap, no inator.
Just come over here.
You've got to see this.
It was delivered today.
I had to sign for it and everything.
Doofenshmirtz: It's a real castle! With with a moat! Who delivers a moat? How do they even get that on a plane? It's from my great Aunt, Henrietta Hakenschpit.
She left it to me in her will.
Look, listen to this.
"To Heinz Doofenshmirtz, you are my only nephew, except for Roger, and I hated him.
" See? See why I liked her? "Therefore I leave you my castle and hidden inside is a very large treasure.
" Huh? And look, there's a little treasure map with clues! Wanna help me? Oh, come on! It'll be fun.
Take off your secret agent hat just for tonight and put on your adventure hat.
That's my guy! Treasure, ho! This is gonna be fun.
Vanessa: Welcome to my Castle Party! Here's a mask.
- Lacey? Wow! Great costume! - This is a costume party? Sir Grant of the Goth Table has arrived.
You look great, Sir Grant.
Goth dragons beware.
- Candace: Vanessa? - Candace.
Whoops! I guess your party is gonna have two vampire queens.
What are the chances, right? Stacy: I'm gonna go change.
How did you ever pull this off? Well, my Dad gave me permission to use his castle and then all I had to do was call the best party planners in town.
Ferb, you go get the four-forty junction box hooked up behind the riser and I'll go check up on the pumpkin crudites.
- Et tu, Vanessa? - I had to! This is a big night for me.
My boyfriend is coming Oh! Here he is right now.
Ooh, a vampire.
It's a good thing I have my neck covered.
You're not my boyfriend.
Whoops.
[CHUCKLES.]
Sorry, I thought you were my - Jeremy, it's me, Candace.
- Ooh, a vampire.
- It's a good thing I have - Yeah, I heard you the first time.
All right, the first clue is in the letter.
Let's see here "My treasure awaits you, keep on the trail.
A ride up the stairs from under a veil.
" What kind of twisted gibberish is this? That's it! Henrietta's chair lift.
Oh, yeah! Here, you can sit here, Perry the Platypus.
No? All right, suit yourself.
We're coming for your treasure, Henrietta [SCREAMS.]
Ha! I got it! [GROWL.]
[SHRIEKS.]
They shipped the alligator, too? Get away, from me, Susan.
We talked about this! Phineas: These scalloped cheese slices should be staged directly across from the crackers, but overall, nice work.
Hey, look at you! You're Isabella-rella.
If I lose a slipper tonight, you know where to find me.
- Oh, that reminds me.
- Oops! Phineas: There's some water on the floor over by the sally port.
Buford, it is so hot in here.
Can I please have some punch? You don't want to drink that.
You know, I think we have the best Castle Party costume.
Carl: Hey, Buford, look at me.
I'm a castle.
At a Castle Party.
Get it? Huh? Huh? Yeah.
Hey, Windsor, your drawbridge is down.
Oh, my! How embarrassing.
Monty should've been here by now.
Finally! Wait Who are you? I'm the Scarlet Pimpernel.
- As am I.
- Same here.
PIMPERNELS: We are all here! [GROANS.]
Stacy: Hey! What's going Oh, for crying out loud! Okay, Ferb, let's kick this biggest, baddest Halloween-iest bash into high gear! [CHEERING.]
We got squirrels in the pants Look at them They're stompin' their feet Look, look at them They're stompin' their feet Look at them They're stomping their feet Stompin' their feet They're stompin' their They're stompin' their It's a spa day Yeah Shiatsu Gesundheit Thank you very much We got a salt scrub, a hot tub What's it gonna be? A foot bath, a facial Aromatherapy It's a spa day Yeah We got squirrels in the pants We got squirrels in the pants I'm Lindana and I wanna, wanna, wanna have fun We got, we got, we got, We got squirrels in the pants "In the dungeon you will find an elevator out of time.
" I really don't remember an elevator down here.
[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS.]
Well, what do you know? How could I have missed it? "In the elevator, to the top you go.
The next clue is down below.
" Well, that doesn't really make a lot of sense.
[ELEVATOR DINGS.]
Why did she make us come all the way up here if the clue is down [SCREAMS.]
[CONTINUES SCREAMING.]
[SPLASH.]
[SCREAMS.]
[GROWLS.]
Wait a second.
Give me that thing.
[SPANISH GUITAR PLAYS.]
Now, that is my boyfriend.
When a vampire queen locks her thirsty eyes on a Pimpernel And the music casts its ghostly spell It's like waving a blood red cape in front of a vampire bull Baljeet: [VOCALIZING.]
And that's a feeling we all know so well I find that I am Haunted by you And you are haunted by me too It's a story as old as time Vampire queens dig Pimpernels - Nice of you to finally show up! - Yeah, you're not gonna believe this, but all the costume shops were out of Pimpernel outfits.
[CHUCKLES.]
Oh, I believe it.
- Oh, what's wrong, Isabella? - I ran out of shoes.
Oh, that's okay, it's more fun to dance barefoot anyway! Stompin' their feet They're stompin' their They're stompin' their, stompin' their [CLANKING.]
Whoops, sorry.
It's all right.
Monty, is that you? With the daughter of my sworn enemy? It can't be! All right, Monty, you've got a lot of Ooh! Oh, hello, Mr.
Water and Power guy.
I, um better check the things.
Yes.
Thanks, Stacy.
I owe you.
No thanks are necessary for that darned elusive Pimpernel! - Where did Monty go? - Oh, he's up there on the window ledge.
Until next time, My Queen.
[BLOWS KISS.]
Wow! That was really kind of swashbuckley.
[GROANS.]
Let's hope she didn't see that.
[DANCE MUSIC PLAYING.]
"By luck or by chance, you found the last clue.
Turn the corner, favorite nephew.
" [STAMMERING.]
What does she mean, "Turn the corner"? It's just a flat wall.
It's a What are you doing, Perry the Platypus? Oh! The corner of her picture.
Give it a turn.
With your little platypus hands, there.
[MACHINERY WHIRRING.]
At last! Whoo-hoo! I'm rich! I am rich! I am comfortably well-off.
Don't worry, Perry the Platypus, I won't forget about you.
You'll be the first person I invite to my next pináta party.
Uh, excuse me, sir.
Are you the owner of this here building? Yes.
This area's not zoned for medieval castles.
You're going to have to pay a penalty fee.
Penalty fee? How much? One canvas bag with a huge dollar sign on it.
Thank you, here's your receipt.
Well, at least I still have all this loot! Danville Water Management Department.
Can I see your permit for that moat? - Bureau of Castle Conservation.
- All right.
- WOMAN 1: Parking fines.
- Doofenshmirtz: Here you go.
- MAN 1: Castle Relocation Authority.
- Doofenshmirtz: Yeah, one for you too.
- MAN 2: Ways and Means.
- Doofenshmirtz: Yeah.
- WOMAN 2: Means and Ways.
- Doofenshmirtz: Take it.
Here, just - MAN 3: Tri-State HOA.
- Doofenshmirtz: Sure.
Why not? MAN 4: Department of Bureaucracy.
[Doofenshmirtz GROANS.]
[DOORBELL RINGS.]
CHILDREN: Trick or treat! Oh, my! Look at all the fun costumes! Here you go.
And here's one for you.
And here's one for the little princess.
And one for you.
Oh, but wait! Don't go away.
[IN SING-SONG VOICE.]
We have little surprise for you! [ROARS.]
[CHILDREN SCREAMING.]
Oh, I do so love Halloween.
We're gonna save a ton of money on candy this year.
"Face Your Fear" Okay, guys.
Now you try it! Nice! Very smooth, Baljeet.
[CLANG.]
- What's the problem, Buford? - Why, you know, the sun was in my eyes.
Buford, what's with the lack of effort? - I'm just trying to be careful.
- You? Yeah, we're out of credit at the emergency room.
My mom said if I break one more bone, she's gonna break the rest of 'em.
Fairly sure that was hyperbole.
Besides, look how hard that hydrant is.
Well, maybe we could make our own fire hydrants out of soft foam rubber.
Hey! That's a great idea! Ferb, I know what we're gonna do today.
Seriously? That's it? A soft fire plug? Well, yeah.
Attached to a giant revolving treadmill with a giant soft neighborhood, containing soft obstacles.
Oh, yeah, okay.
- Where is Perry? - What did you say? I was just asking where Perry is.
- Oh.
- What did you think I said? Uh, well, I thought you said Uh, never mind.
It was too weird.
[ACTION MUSIC.]
[MONOGRAM GRUNTING.]
[GROANING.]
Get it off! Ugh! Sorry, Agent P, I just walked through a spider web.
Don't you just hate that? You spend the rest of the day worried there's a spider on you.
[SHUDDERS.]
Gives me the willies.
Any-hoo, our sources tell us that there's a cowboy hat in front of Doof's building.
Normally, that wouldn't be of any interest to us, because this is the week of the Danville Hootenanny, But it's a rather large hat, and, in spite of its name, the Danville Hootenanny is a dignified affair.
I wish I had more information, but Carl said there was a big bee by the surveillance equipment.
So, get out there, Agent P.
[SHUDDERS.]
Carl, is is there a spider on my head? Carl: No, sir.
There's no spider on your head.
NARRATOR: Meanwhile, at the Danville Space Laboratory MAN: "Laboratory"? [GRUNTING IN FRUSTRATION.]
Oh, Jack, it sure was nice of you to show Candace and me around.
This satellite stuff is very interesting.
No problem, Linda.
I'm flattered you'd be interested in our humble facility, considering your background in astrophysics.
Oh, yeah.
Uh, listen, that's kind of a secret.
- So don't - Oh! Oh, I'm sorry.
- So, what does your father do here? - Oh, he's part of a team that makes and manages reconnaissance satellites.
They actually had a couple of Rovers on Mars earlier this summer.
But they suddenly stopped working.
You wouldn't know anything about that, would you? Uh, how would I, uh [CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY.]
What do you mean? All right, Your Highness.
- [GASPS.]
Who told? - Stacy.
CHORUS: # Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated! # Uh, Perry the Platypus, I bet you're wondering wondering why I'm cowering outside my lab.
Well, the day started like any other day.
You know, I, "How am I going to take over the Tri-State Area," but and I suddenly remembered a movie that I'd seen long ago at a drive-in.
It was called Night of the Felis.
I knew right away that the old masters were onto something.
Imagine, taking something cute and enlarging it to frightening proportions.
Brilliant! But in order to take over the Tri-State Area, I'd have to start with some other type of small animals.
[PEOPLE IN MOVIE SCREAMING.]
Preferably something that could fly.
[CATS IN MOVIE MEWLING.]
And I vowed to get right to work, as soon as the movie was over.
The first thing I needed to do was create an inator that would make things larger.
Huh? I tried it out on my cowboy hat.
It was a success.
My ten-gallon hat had turned into a two thousand-gallon hat.
Whoa! [CRASHING.]
[CAR ALARM WAILING.]
Well, that's the end of that hat.
Next, I had to genetically modify a mouse so it could fly.
[MOUSE SQUEALING.]
[BITING.]
Doofenshmirtz: Ow! Then I decided it would be easier to just use a bat.
So, I ordered a retired stunt bat from a low-budget bat circus that had recently gone belly-up.
You know, the economy.
I was on the precipice of Tri-State Area domination.
At last, I had the ultimate creepy soldier! [SQUEAKS.]
And then I remembered, I had a very mild phobia of bats.
[BAT SQUEAKING.]
[SHRIEKS.]
Get away, get away, get away! I also have a mild phobia of shellfish.
WAITRESS: Here's your order, sir.
Doofenshmirtz: [SHRIEKS.]
Get away, get away, get away! But bats are worse.
Scram, you flying gerbil! [BAT SQUEAKING.]
Am-scray! [SQUEAKING.]
You're making me miss the Hootenanny! [SQUEAKING.]
Sir, I found your radio.
It was embedded in the dashboard of your car.
Norm! Don't just stand there! Do something about this bat! Really? That's your solution? Throw a radio at it.
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Don't throw that.
That's imitatable.
What if I hit it with this? No! No! Wait! Don't shoot him with that! That's my And I thought the bat was scary before, when he was, you know, tiny.
[BAT SHRIEKING MENACINGLY.]
It was at that point that Norm and I decided to come out here.
Plus the bat kind of looks like my cousin, Narthelliot! Which, as you can imagine, is weird for me.
- Isn't that about right, Norm? - It's even more horrible than it looks! Phineas: Everybody got their helmets and boards? - Isabella: Yeah! - Buford and Baljeet: I'm ready! Okay, Ferb, fire it up.
We're going to Foam Town! [WHOOPING.]
[GRUNTS.]
There's nothing that I've found as good as goin' round and round In Foam Town In Foam Town I used to skin my knees [WHOOPING.]
But here it doesn't matter where I fall You'll never get scarred 'cause nothing's really hard In Foam Town So take a rollin' ride on a squeezable urban sprawl Come on down to Foam Town In Foam Town Yeah There's no bruises or concussions There's no painful repercussions There's no braces There's no bandages No hospital stay If you jump and try to land it You can eat it or face-plant it And you know that your insurance plan will not have to pay Come on down to Foam Town Come on down to Foam Town Come on down Just come on down to Foam Town Come on down to Foam Town Yeah! Come on down Come on down to Foam Town And over here are the models of our robotically operated Rovers.
The Mars Rover, the Moon Rover, and this is the Irish Rover.
- You sent a Rover to Ireland? - Well, we had to test it somewhere.
In a land afar in Castlebar Many months ago We sent an Irish Rover To look around, you know With a tur-la-lur-la Fiddle-die-dee And a tur-a-fiddle-die-do In a land afar in Castlebar Many months ago It took a couple of months, but we're finally starting to get some really great pictures back.
Thank you for the blanket, Perry the Platypus.
- Vanessa: Dad? - Vanessa? [WHISPERING.]
Oh, no! Vanessa, get out of there! - There's a huge bat on the loose.
- Really? [SHRIEKING.]
Vanessa: Wow! Cool.
It looks like your cousin, Narthelliot.
[QUIETLY.]
No sudden movements or loud noises, Vanessa.
Dad, relax.
It's just a bat.
They just eat bugs.
But it's a very big bat! Now, come on.
Just, just stand up.
It's okay.
It's time to face your fear.
[BAT GROWLING.]
[NERVOUSLY.]
Well, okay [MUFFLED GROANING.]
Oh, no, no! Bad bat! Spit him out! [GROANS.]
Gross! [SCREAMS.]
Oh, yeah, this is much better! [BAT SHRIEKING.]
Dad! Oh, hey, Perry.
I was wondering if you could help me.
[ENGINE FIRING UP.]
Thanks, Perry.
You're a peach.
So, what did I miss? Oh, hey, Narthelliot! We were just talking about you.
Jack: Of course, even better than using a Rover, we have these.
We call them global surveillance satellites.
No matter where you are on this Earth, there's always one of these flying above you in orbit, streaming live video to us here.
That's right.
Here's the outside of our building, right now.
And we can look up any location, instantly.
The Eiffel Tower, the Taj Mahal So, you could look down on anybody's backyard and just see what they're doing? - Pretty cool, huh? - Wow, that's got to be handy for something.
And three.
Two.
One - What? - Really? All right.
[SHRIEKING.]
[Doofenshmirtz SCREAMING.]
Whoa! Oh, I get it.
This is what it does.
Flying through a hoop.
That's what I get for buying a bat from a defunct bat circus! - So, having fun yet? - Oh, you know I am! You know, my Dad goes on and on about the cafeteria here, and I think he's right.
This food is [SPITTING.]
[GASPS.]
I've got an idea! My brothers are probably building something in our backyard right now, and we can use the surveillance satellite to catch them doing it! Come on! I was wondering how long that would take.
Just let me punch in my address [GASPS.]
Oh, my gosh! I knew it! Look at that thing! - Wow.
What is it? - It's an eye in the sky bust! Come on, let's go get my Mom.
Okay, Ferb, turn it off.
Let's take a little break.
[Buford GRUNTING.]
- You okay, Buford? - I'm having the time of my life! - Is anybody else hungry? - I am! Come on, let's go see what's in the kitchen.
Doofenshmirtz: Oh no! Oh, no, no! Not again! [CLANGING.]
Ow, my head! Ow, my head again! Ow! Now I forgot math.
Ow! There goes Social Studies.
Oh, good! They're back! This way, Mom.
Just see for yourself.
Oh, wow! It's our house! And you can see the boys! And their little skateboards.
Hi, boys! - They can't hear you, you know.
- I know.
Hi! Whoo-hoo! Hey! Foam Town's gone.
You say that like it doesn't happen every day.
And you say that like an angry old prospector.
- What does that even mean? - I stand by that metaphor.
Finally, Daisy, we're here.
Our new home! Lots of elbow-room and no one to bother us.
The last frontier! A place where a man and his donkey can Dang it! Come on, Daisy, we're heading west.
[Doofenshmirtz SCREAMING.]
Perry the Platypus! Welcome to Saint Louis.
Now, do something about this bat, please! [SQUEAKING.]
[YELPS.]
Well, at least I lost my fear of bats.
[CRASHING.]
[GRUNTS.]
WAITRESS: Oh, it's you again.
Doofenshmirtz: [SCREAMING.]
Go away, go away, go away! WAITRESS: Oh, just stop it.
There's nothing that I've found as good as goin' round and round In Foam Town In Foam Town I used to skin my knees [WHOOPING.]
But here it doesn't matter where I fall You'll never get scarred 'cause nothing's really hard In Foam Town So take a rollin' ride on a squeezable urban sprawl Come on down to Foam Town