Phineas and Ferb s04e26 Episode Script

1 There's a hundred and four days of summer vacation and school comes along just to end it So the annual problem for our generation is finding a good way to spend it Like maybe Building a rocket, or fighting a mummy or climbing up the Eiffel Tower Discovering something that doesn't exist Hey! Or giving a monkey a shower Surfing tidal waves Creating nano-bots or locating Frankenstein's brain It's over here! Finding a dodo bird Painting a continent Or driving our sister insane Phineas! As you can see, there's a whole lot of stuff to do before school starts this fall Come on, Perry.
So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all! So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all! Mom, Phineas and Ferb are making a title sequence! What have we got so far? I've got a bottle cap and a brass nail.
- Two bottle caps and a nail.
- A washer, a hinge, and a nail.
I've got a nickel and a piece of brass! No, wait, it's a nail.
You never know what you're going to find.
I do.
Another nail.
- Or a bottle cap.
- Hi, Phineas.
Whatcha doin'? We're looking for stuff with Dad's steam-powered metal detector.
Wow.
An antique that locates other antiques.
Oh! We've got another one.
- Cool.
Let me dig it up.
- Oh, there's a good lad.
Wait.
It's not a nail, it's a coin! Well, let's have a look then, huh? Oh, yes, I've seen this before.
It's a commemorative coin from the 1903 Danville World's Fair.
Many steam-driven devices were introduced to the world back then.
It must've been quite an event! Welcome to the future, all you forward-thinking socialites Delightful world of steam so bright Change your life overnight Behold, this lady's hair brush This motor-powered cow If you don't know how this gizmo works I'll try to show you how It's robotic kitchens, prototypes, a singing kettle You'll love this nut and turtle shell made of living metal You'll never need to settle for yesterday's future We've borrowed from tomorrow Steam power, it's so super! Welcome to a brave new world! My word! The future is an amazing time for you to climb aboard Welcome to a brand-new day Hurray! Everything will change Time for me to show the way Step in closer, I've got so much to show you.
A robotic rooster starts the morning And a rocket-powered cycle takes you skyward, and you're soaring Till you fall towards a lovely picnic made of future food Steam-powered sandwiches, useful speaking fruits You're living in your prime, catching lightning in a jar Robot butlers keep you tidy, no matter where you are The future runs like clockwork, and you'll never need to stress You really can't afford it That's the price of steam progress! Welcome to a brave new world My word! The future is amazing Time for you to climb aboard Welcome to a brand-new day Hurray! Everything will change Time for me to show the way You there, sir! Yes, you there, with the excellent hat and that hair.
You're clearly a man of taste.
Step up here, would you? Take a look at this marvelous machine.
Wow! The future's gonna be amazing! Flying machines, household electrification, steam-powered submarines! Personally, I'm looking forward to cheese that comes in aerosol cans.
- Still hard at work, Dad? - Well, hello there, my young fellows! - Find anything good yet? - Oh, just some old Civil War coins.
The Union assault against the sunken road eventual pierced the Confederate center, - but the Federal advantage was not followed - Dad? Dad? I'm sorry, we've got, uh, chores to do.
Oh, yes, yes, yes.
Go ahead, boys.
Don't let me stop you.
As I was saying Oh, I'm a trudging to get some water down this old and dusty road I reckon there'll be more someday than just tree sticks and Wait a minute! Wait a minute! You should be doing your farm chores.
Milking the cows, mending the fences, shucking the corn, plowing the fields, and milking the cows again.
You can't just stand around, you know? Actually, Candace, we were thinking about a way to do our chores using modern steam technology.
We learned all about it at the World's Fair.
Oh, did you now? Well, if I didn't have to haul water, sweep the barn, collect eggs, spin a quilt, and do whatever this is, I'd tell Mom.
I wonder if she knows those buckets have holes in them? Hello, boys.
We would like to inquire as to what you are doing at this moment? Well, like we were just telling Candace, we were just about to create a steam-powered machine that would help with our Hey, where's Sweary? Found him! Found him! Oh, there you are, Sweary the Swan.
Man, that pet of yours gives me the creeps! Oh, come on, Buford.
You know swans don't do much.
Don't do much? The beak bite on my butt begs to differ.
Good morning, Agent S.
This is Major Megaburns.
Your archenemy, Professor von Doofenshmirtz, has been spotted creating something evil in his laboratory.
Go check it out.
Perhaps Sweary would wanna try my steam-powered jetpack.
It's very heavy and full of boiling-hot water.
Hey, wait a minute! How come your zoetrope image is so much cooler than mine? It's not cooler, sir, it's just got more frames.
Doofenshmirtz, Doofenshmirtz, Doofenshmirtz Doofenshmirtz Evil Amalgamated Ah, Sweary the Swan! How completely unforeseen is your Uh, hang on a second.
Ah, that's better.
Sweary the swan! How completely unforeseen is your presence here.
And by that, I mean, completely foreseen! Hey, no bites.
I've got a little something for you.
Well, hello there! Allow me to introduce to you my sidekick, Pneumatic Pnorman.
And both of those are spelt with a "P.
" You know, the the "P's" are silent.
I don't even know why they put 'em in there if they're not gonna pronounce it.
It's just a waste of a good letter.
That's what it is.
But I babble.
Back on topic Shall I put this cucumber in the salad, sir? That's not a cucumber, Pnorm.
I'm sorry about that, Sweary.
He has problems identifying objects.
Pnorm, that's a swan, and we're going to tie him to the railroad tracks.
How melodramatic! Wow! Do you preen your feathers with that mouth? They should call you S Oh! Oh, I get it! Sweary the Swan.
Okay, we're all set, Ferb.
Start her up.
Shuck the corn! Milk the cows! Mend the fences! And lastly, plow and seed the field.
I feel like I've been carrying these buckets all summer! I'll never get to the fair in time to meet Jeremy! Hey, Candace! Is that a steam-powered chore-doing device? You are so going to get it! Get back here, you steam punks! Sorry, Candace, it won't stop till we run out of coal! I shall go fetch Mother! Ma! Sweary the Swan, did you know that the World's Fair is in town? They have all of this amazing new technology.
Here, look.
It's all represented here on this commemorative coin that I got.
Ow! Now, look what you did.
You made me drop it.
Pnorman, go find that coin.
It's probably right at your feet, sir.
I can't bend over without pulling my axles out of alignment.
Yeah, whatever, think of something.
Anyway, like I was saying before you bit my thumb, down at the fair they have all these neat, new steam-powered gizmos that they plan to use for progress.
Normally, I wouldn't mind, but they're also attaching a lot of hope and optimism to progress, and that's something I will not put up with.
So, I've built a big monster machine to smash their World's Fair to bits! Behold! It's an evil swan! It's a It's a big swan.
It's like you, but, you know, bigger and hammer-ier.
It's got more hammers than you do.
Plus, it runs on the new technology of steam! Sir, I found your coin.
That's not a coin.
That's my daughter, you dolt! No wonder she wouldn't fit in the gumball machine.
You hear that, Sweary the Swan? That is the sound of Aerosol cheese! We didn't hear what you said! Oh, for - Ma! - Oh, these new gadgets are so complicated.
Up and down, and up and down and up Ma! Ma! Ma! The boys! Machine to do their chores! Not fair! Oh, my! That sounds exciting.
I'll come have a look as soon as I'm done doing whatever this is.
I don't believe it! A fuzzy doll in the shape of a bear? It's the end of decency.
You never believed in me or anthropomorphism.
Everybody, run! It's a big hammery swan! Ha! Soon you will all see the power of my We can't hear you! Look! A huge, rampaging, steam-powered hammery swan! If only there was a way we could record this event.
Auguste, you have just invented the moving picture documentary.
Quickly, mood music! This sure is a lot of shucked corn and fresh milk.
All in an afternoon's work.
Aren't you a bit young to be industrial revolutionaries? Yes.
Yes, we are.
As a simple farmer from a bygone age, that's good enough for me.
All right, Spartacus, let's get these goods to market, and then it's back to the bookcase for you.
All our chores are done and it's still light out.
What else do you guys wanna do today? We could drink lemonade and sit on the porch.
We could go to Panama and start digging.
We could formally begin courting.
- What? - Nothing.
They built a giant machine that does their chores.
It shucks the corn, and it shoots seeds out of a Gatling gu - But, but, but - Candace, it's 1903.
We do not use that word! No, no, no, you're not getting my best side.
But here, let me show you my worst side! What? Sweary the swan! Ah, you wanna play swan-chicken, huh? Oh, no.
Get back here! Oh, no! He's using the old foie gras maneuver.
Curse you, Sweary the Swan! And that's the way it was at the Danville World's Fair.
A giant steam-powered hammering swan? Come on, Dad.
That sounds a little far-fetched for the time period, doesn't it? Oh, yes.
Yes, it does.
Man, how long was I up there? Welcome to the future, all you forward-thinking socialites Delightful world of steam so bright Change your life overnight Behold, this lady's hair brush This motor-powered cow If you don't know how this gizmo works I'll try to show you how It's robotic kitchens, prototypes, a singing kettle You'll love this nut and turtle shell made of living metal You'll never need to settle for yesterday's future We've borrowed from tomorrow Steam power, it's so super! Welcome to a brave new world! My word! The future is an amazing time for you to climb aboard Welcome to a brand-new day Hurray! Everything will change Time for me to show the way