Spin City s04e26 Episode Script
Goodbye (2)
Previously, spin city [ALL SHOUTING QUESTIONS.]
Good afternoon.
I have a brief statement to make.
The allegations against the mayor are ridiculous.
If there has been any wrongdoing in this administration, there's only one person who's at fault.
And that person is me.
[REPORTERS MURMURING.]
[ACOUSTIC GUITAR PLAYS.]
I can't believe this is happening.
I know.
They're really ripping into Mike.
It says here he completely trashed a trailer park.
Uh No.
That's tropical storm Mike.
Hey, guys, Mike called.
He says the best move is for him to stay clear of city hall and wait for the press to cool out.
So we're gonna have the morning meeting without him.
Paul, are you listening? I'm sorry.
I have a big wad of "you're not my boss" in my ear.
I have an idea.
Why don't we tape this so Mike can hear it later? You know, I don't know how you people think we can have a meeting without Mike.
Mike is our leader! He's talented! He's devilishly handsome! This is Paul speaking! Mike is counting on us.
We're the only people who can help him.
Actually, they're sending in the red cross.
Oh.
Uh, never mind.
If we all put our heads together, we can figure out a way to get him out of this.
Any suggestions? Let's go to Mike's.
CARTER: Perfect.
Last night, you were amazing.
You started out as Mike, then you turned into the hulk.
You know, honey, I'm not one of those guys that needs constant reassurance, because I am the hulk.
Huuahhh! [DEEP VOICE.]
What are you doing in the hulk's apartment? I still have a key.
Mike, what can we do? [NORMAL VOICE.]
Call ahead, ring, knock.
Pick one.
Mike, are you okay? Oh, guys, come on.
This is nothin' I can't fix.
Really? Because we just spent an entire meeting trying to figure it out, and we got nowhere.
Uh When you get a chance.
As long as they can't connect the mayor with Tony DeMarco, they got nothin'.
Okay, then I guess we just came over to cheer you up.
Caitlin had the same idea.
You know, Caitlin, I've been feelin' a little down lately.
PAUL: Hey, Mike You might want to take a look at this.
Although Flaherty claims to e the only member of the administration with ties to Tony demarc, this reporter has discovered evidence linking the mayor himself with the mob figure.
The key here is to keep putting everything on me.
First, distance yourself.
Nikki, make sure Tony doesn't think you're still dating.
Fine.
I will die alone with 17 cats.
Carter, Stuart, how much money did you guys make on that horse tip? $15,000.
Not much.
Get rid of it.
Not a problem.
And get rid of it without getting any sexual favors in return.
Fine.
James, janelle, go to city hall, build a moat around the mayor's office.
I don't want a reporter getting anywhere near him.
And, janelle, make sure James doesn't actually build a moat around the mayor's office.
What can I do? First, you can get me some pants.
Done! Uh, Paul Schedule a press conference for this afternoon.
But I just did the pants thing.
Go! Go! Um, make sure any paper trail that exists ends up on my desk.
But that would mean that you would be the one who Mike, thank God.
Have you been watching TV? They're saying the worst things about me.
And look at the picture they're using.
It's the one with the big sideburns.
I look like I should be leading troops into gettysburg.
[SIGHS.]
I'm in big trouble, aren't I, Mike? Sir, it's gonna be okay.
I found a way out of this.
Ahh! Why was I worried? You always do.
I knew you would.
What is it? Can we sit down? Yeah.
Uh, yeah, I found a way out of this, but the thing is, you're gonna have to, uh, fire me.
What? I-I've looked at this from every angle.
Well, I won't do it.
I'll take the fall myself.
I appreciate that, sir, but if you take the fall, then the whole staff goes down with you.
This way, only one person gets hurt.
Well, why can't that person be Paul? Sir, I-I took this job because I knew you could make a difference in this city, and you have.
I mean, you do every day.
So, if losing my job is what it takes to preserve that I-I have no regrets.
Hey, Mike! We did it.
I took care of Tony.
And Stuart and I got rid of that money.
Yeah, we gave it to needy children.
It's odd, I don't feel as ripped off as I thought I would.
The problem is solved.
Great.
That's great, guys.
You came through.
Do you want to proof that and then type it up for me? What do you think you're doing? Somebody had to take the hit.
Yeah, but it can't be you.
Carter, the only person it can't be is the mayor.
Everybody else is expendable.
So, you just Made this decision without coming to me.
All right, Carter, who should take the hit? Paul.
Hey, you know what? Look at it this way.
With me gone, you'll be the smartest guy in the place.
Or you could stay, and that would still be true.
Don't make me dredge up the whole trivial pursuit fiasco, Mr.
"I don't know the capital of Florida.
" Hey, it should be Miami major port city, renowned for its culture.
Besides, Madonna would never be caught dead "clubbing" in Tallahassee.
I'm gonna miss this.
Yeah, yeah.
Me too.
You know that You're you're my best friend, right? Mike, I [CLEARS THROAT.]
I just want to say that, uh damn, this has to be perfect.
Carter I love you, too.
All right [CLEARS THROAT.]
heads up, lady-killer.
You got a press conference.
As you all know, Michael Flaherty has served this administration admirably for the last four years.
In light of recent event, it is no longer appropriate for him to serve as part of this administration.
appropriate for him to serve as part of this ad I keep hoping one channel will have a happy ending.
It's not the end of the world.
So, who's gonna take care of the mayor? You are.
Now Grab this beer, go sit with the rest of the gang at the table.
[SIGHS.]
You know, you're not my boss anymore.
Mike I am so sorry about this.
Come on, Nik.
Listen, don't blame yourself.
I don't believe it.
My love life has gotten so bad it's ruining people's careers.
Years from now, I'm gonna look back on this as the best thing that ever happened to me.
Wow.
That is such b.
S.
I never could lie to you.
God knows I tried.
You know, when we broke up, I hated the fact that we worked in the same office because having to see you every day was just too painful.
Now the idea of not seeing you every day is, uh 10 times worse.
You're amazing.
See, that I can believe.
Hey, Flaherty, get over here.
Mike, we're trying to figure out of your entire career, what's your proudest moment? I say it was settling the taxi strike.
No, no, no, restoring grand central station.
Getting the smut out of Times Square.
That's no accomplishment.
That just means I have to go to queens.
All right, uh Well, I'm proud of all those things.
But if I had to pick one Okay, there was this kid from the midwest, shows up at my office one day.
He's wearing a wool suit [LAUGHS.]
And it's the middle of July.
And he he wants to apply for a job.
So, you know, I figure I'll humor the guy, ask him a couple questions, and then [WHISTLES.]
get rid of him.
So, uh Then he starts talking about his family, and he's so unpretentious, but so eloquent.
And I think "That's how the mayor of New York should sound.
" So I took a risk and I hired him, and it's been paying off every day.
Wow.
I'd like to meet that guy.
James You are that guy.
I've got a story like that for every one of you.
I don't think you guys realize what an incredible team you are.
My greatest accomplishment is sitting around this table right now.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
I think I'm gonna cry.
Oh, come on.
I feel bad that Mike had to throw himself on the sword like that, but it comes with the territory.
Mike's a big boy, and, uh, I just don't think we need to get all misty about it.
I respect that.
Whatever.
[SNIFFLES.]
I'll see you around.
Uh, I gotta I gotta head home.
Mike, I just want to say it's been a privilege to work with you.
[VOICE BREAKING.]
It's been a real honor.
I love you, man.
Thanks, Paul.
No, no.
Unh-unh.
I have this.
You're kidding, right? No.
Yep.
Yep.
You know there were appetizers? I know.
I want to do this.
Thanks.
[VOICE BREAKING.]
All right, let's divvy this up.
I only had four nachos.
Hi.
Hey.
How come you didn't make it to the bar? Well, it's a little crazy at the office.
I heard you lost somebody pretty valuable today.
He was just eye candy.
Look.
What's this? Well, I figured a home-cooked meal would cheer you up.
I didn't know you cooked.
Normally I don't, but I thought I'd learn for you.
You know, it's gonna be okay.
I'm gonna bounce back from this.
I'm gonna bounce back, right? Of course, Mike.
It's not over, right? It's a long way from over.
It's funny, though, because every morning as long as I can remember, I wake up in the morning, I got somewhere to go, I got something to do.
What am I gonna do tomorrow when the alarm goes off? I wouldn't set it.
Uh, what about you, huh? Are you still gonna love me now that I'm an unemployed political pariah? Well, love's a strong word, but we could hang out.
[SIGHS.]
I don't care if you never work again.
I'm not going anywhere.
Hey, sir.
What's this? Uh Well, Mike, you know how uncomfortable I am expressing my feelings.
So I thought I'd say goodbye to you on video.
But, um, you're here.
So I might just as well do it right in front of you.
That'd be great.
I'd like that.
Hi, Mike.
It's me, the mayor.
I, uh, I could never, uh, say this t-to your face, but you've been like a son to me.
And I am just so proud of what you've become.
You know, the years that we've been working together, they've just been the best years of my life.
[VOICE BREAKING.]
Even during the tough times.
I could always count on you your friendship, your strength.
I hope you know how important you've been to me.
And how and how much I really appreciate you.
Well, anyway, Mike Listen, I just want to say I'll miss you.
And, uh I love you, son.
[SNIFFLES.]
That's done.
[SNIFFLING.]
There you go.
Thanks, Mr.
mayor.
It's Randall.
All right.
["GLORY DAYS" BY BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN PLAYS.]
Welcome.
You've got mail.
MIKE: Hiya, sweetie.
Sorry it took so long to write.
I miss you.
I miss you, too.
Say hi to everybody for me.
Unless when you sat down, your e-mail was already open.
In which case, I'm guessing Carter already read it.
It's amazing how much I love being an environmental lobbyis.
Although not everybody lov us, especially the conservatives.
I just met this junior senatr from Ohio.
What a stiff Alex p.
Keaton.
Anyway, I can't wait to see you this weekend.
I love you.
And don't worry about me.
Everything is gonna be oka.
I got a big appointment this afternoon, if I could just find it.
They don't put addresses on any of the buildings here.
kept talking about was glory days well, they'll pass you by Ah that's 1600.
This is so cool! Glory da-a-a-ys glory days well, they'll pass you by glory days in the wink of a young girl's eye Glory days glory da-a-a-ys well, they'll pass you by glory days in the wink of a young girl's eye Glory days glory da-a-a-ys - [MAN.]
Sit, ubu, sit.
Good dog.
- [UBU BARKS.]
Good afternoon.
I have a brief statement to make.
The allegations against the mayor are ridiculous.
If there has been any wrongdoing in this administration, there's only one person who's at fault.
And that person is me.
[REPORTERS MURMURING.]
[ACOUSTIC GUITAR PLAYS.]
I can't believe this is happening.
I know.
They're really ripping into Mike.
It says here he completely trashed a trailer park.
Uh No.
That's tropical storm Mike.
Hey, guys, Mike called.
He says the best move is for him to stay clear of city hall and wait for the press to cool out.
So we're gonna have the morning meeting without him.
Paul, are you listening? I'm sorry.
I have a big wad of "you're not my boss" in my ear.
I have an idea.
Why don't we tape this so Mike can hear it later? You know, I don't know how you people think we can have a meeting without Mike.
Mike is our leader! He's talented! He's devilishly handsome! This is Paul speaking! Mike is counting on us.
We're the only people who can help him.
Actually, they're sending in the red cross.
Oh.
Uh, never mind.
If we all put our heads together, we can figure out a way to get him out of this.
Any suggestions? Let's go to Mike's.
CARTER: Perfect.
Last night, you were amazing.
You started out as Mike, then you turned into the hulk.
You know, honey, I'm not one of those guys that needs constant reassurance, because I am the hulk.
Huuahhh! [DEEP VOICE.]
What are you doing in the hulk's apartment? I still have a key.
Mike, what can we do? [NORMAL VOICE.]
Call ahead, ring, knock.
Pick one.
Mike, are you okay? Oh, guys, come on.
This is nothin' I can't fix.
Really? Because we just spent an entire meeting trying to figure it out, and we got nowhere.
Uh When you get a chance.
As long as they can't connect the mayor with Tony DeMarco, they got nothin'.
Okay, then I guess we just came over to cheer you up.
Caitlin had the same idea.
You know, Caitlin, I've been feelin' a little down lately.
PAUL: Hey, Mike You might want to take a look at this.
Although Flaherty claims to e the only member of the administration with ties to Tony demarc, this reporter has discovered evidence linking the mayor himself with the mob figure.
The key here is to keep putting everything on me.
First, distance yourself.
Nikki, make sure Tony doesn't think you're still dating.
Fine.
I will die alone with 17 cats.
Carter, Stuart, how much money did you guys make on that horse tip? $15,000.
Not much.
Get rid of it.
Not a problem.
And get rid of it without getting any sexual favors in return.
Fine.
James, janelle, go to city hall, build a moat around the mayor's office.
I don't want a reporter getting anywhere near him.
And, janelle, make sure James doesn't actually build a moat around the mayor's office.
What can I do? First, you can get me some pants.
Done! Uh, Paul Schedule a press conference for this afternoon.
But I just did the pants thing.
Go! Go! Um, make sure any paper trail that exists ends up on my desk.
But that would mean that you would be the one who Mike, thank God.
Have you been watching TV? They're saying the worst things about me.
And look at the picture they're using.
It's the one with the big sideburns.
I look like I should be leading troops into gettysburg.
[SIGHS.]
I'm in big trouble, aren't I, Mike? Sir, it's gonna be okay.
I found a way out of this.
Ahh! Why was I worried? You always do.
I knew you would.
What is it? Can we sit down? Yeah.
Uh, yeah, I found a way out of this, but the thing is, you're gonna have to, uh, fire me.
What? I-I've looked at this from every angle.
Well, I won't do it.
I'll take the fall myself.
I appreciate that, sir, but if you take the fall, then the whole staff goes down with you.
This way, only one person gets hurt.
Well, why can't that person be Paul? Sir, I-I took this job because I knew you could make a difference in this city, and you have.
I mean, you do every day.
So, if losing my job is what it takes to preserve that I-I have no regrets.
Hey, Mike! We did it.
I took care of Tony.
And Stuart and I got rid of that money.
Yeah, we gave it to needy children.
It's odd, I don't feel as ripped off as I thought I would.
The problem is solved.
Great.
That's great, guys.
You came through.
Do you want to proof that and then type it up for me? What do you think you're doing? Somebody had to take the hit.
Yeah, but it can't be you.
Carter, the only person it can't be is the mayor.
Everybody else is expendable.
So, you just Made this decision without coming to me.
All right, Carter, who should take the hit? Paul.
Hey, you know what? Look at it this way.
With me gone, you'll be the smartest guy in the place.
Or you could stay, and that would still be true.
Don't make me dredge up the whole trivial pursuit fiasco, Mr.
"I don't know the capital of Florida.
" Hey, it should be Miami major port city, renowned for its culture.
Besides, Madonna would never be caught dead "clubbing" in Tallahassee.
I'm gonna miss this.
Yeah, yeah.
Me too.
You know that You're you're my best friend, right? Mike, I [CLEARS THROAT.]
I just want to say that, uh damn, this has to be perfect.
Carter I love you, too.
All right [CLEARS THROAT.]
heads up, lady-killer.
You got a press conference.
As you all know, Michael Flaherty has served this administration admirably for the last four years.
In light of recent event, it is no longer appropriate for him to serve as part of this administration.
appropriate for him to serve as part of this ad I keep hoping one channel will have a happy ending.
It's not the end of the world.
So, who's gonna take care of the mayor? You are.
Now Grab this beer, go sit with the rest of the gang at the table.
[SIGHS.]
You know, you're not my boss anymore.
Mike I am so sorry about this.
Come on, Nik.
Listen, don't blame yourself.
I don't believe it.
My love life has gotten so bad it's ruining people's careers.
Years from now, I'm gonna look back on this as the best thing that ever happened to me.
Wow.
That is such b.
S.
I never could lie to you.
God knows I tried.
You know, when we broke up, I hated the fact that we worked in the same office because having to see you every day was just too painful.
Now the idea of not seeing you every day is, uh 10 times worse.
You're amazing.
See, that I can believe.
Hey, Flaherty, get over here.
Mike, we're trying to figure out of your entire career, what's your proudest moment? I say it was settling the taxi strike.
No, no, no, restoring grand central station.
Getting the smut out of Times Square.
That's no accomplishment.
That just means I have to go to queens.
All right, uh Well, I'm proud of all those things.
But if I had to pick one Okay, there was this kid from the midwest, shows up at my office one day.
He's wearing a wool suit [LAUGHS.]
And it's the middle of July.
And he he wants to apply for a job.
So, you know, I figure I'll humor the guy, ask him a couple questions, and then [WHISTLES.]
get rid of him.
So, uh Then he starts talking about his family, and he's so unpretentious, but so eloquent.
And I think "That's how the mayor of New York should sound.
" So I took a risk and I hired him, and it's been paying off every day.
Wow.
I'd like to meet that guy.
James You are that guy.
I've got a story like that for every one of you.
I don't think you guys realize what an incredible team you are.
My greatest accomplishment is sitting around this table right now.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
I think I'm gonna cry.
Oh, come on.
I feel bad that Mike had to throw himself on the sword like that, but it comes with the territory.
Mike's a big boy, and, uh, I just don't think we need to get all misty about it.
I respect that.
Whatever.
[SNIFFLES.]
I'll see you around.
Uh, I gotta I gotta head home.
Mike, I just want to say it's been a privilege to work with you.
[VOICE BREAKING.]
It's been a real honor.
I love you, man.
Thanks, Paul.
No, no.
Unh-unh.
I have this.
You're kidding, right? No.
Yep.
Yep.
You know there were appetizers? I know.
I want to do this.
Thanks.
[VOICE BREAKING.]
All right, let's divvy this up.
I only had four nachos.
Hi.
Hey.
How come you didn't make it to the bar? Well, it's a little crazy at the office.
I heard you lost somebody pretty valuable today.
He was just eye candy.
Look.
What's this? Well, I figured a home-cooked meal would cheer you up.
I didn't know you cooked.
Normally I don't, but I thought I'd learn for you.
You know, it's gonna be okay.
I'm gonna bounce back from this.
I'm gonna bounce back, right? Of course, Mike.
It's not over, right? It's a long way from over.
It's funny, though, because every morning as long as I can remember, I wake up in the morning, I got somewhere to go, I got something to do.
What am I gonna do tomorrow when the alarm goes off? I wouldn't set it.
Uh, what about you, huh? Are you still gonna love me now that I'm an unemployed political pariah? Well, love's a strong word, but we could hang out.
[SIGHS.]
I don't care if you never work again.
I'm not going anywhere.
Hey, sir.
What's this? Uh Well, Mike, you know how uncomfortable I am expressing my feelings.
So I thought I'd say goodbye to you on video.
But, um, you're here.
So I might just as well do it right in front of you.
That'd be great.
I'd like that.
Hi, Mike.
It's me, the mayor.
I, uh, I could never, uh, say this t-to your face, but you've been like a son to me.
And I am just so proud of what you've become.
You know, the years that we've been working together, they've just been the best years of my life.
[VOICE BREAKING.]
Even during the tough times.
I could always count on you your friendship, your strength.
I hope you know how important you've been to me.
And how and how much I really appreciate you.
Well, anyway, Mike Listen, I just want to say I'll miss you.
And, uh I love you, son.
[SNIFFLES.]
That's done.
[SNIFFLING.]
There you go.
Thanks, Mr.
mayor.
It's Randall.
All right.
["GLORY DAYS" BY BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN PLAYS.]
Welcome.
You've got mail.
MIKE: Hiya, sweetie.
Sorry it took so long to write.
I miss you.
I miss you, too.
Say hi to everybody for me.
Unless when you sat down, your e-mail was already open.
In which case, I'm guessing Carter already read it.
It's amazing how much I love being an environmental lobbyis.
Although not everybody lov us, especially the conservatives.
I just met this junior senatr from Ohio.
What a stiff Alex p.
Keaton.
Anyway, I can't wait to see you this weekend.
I love you.
And don't worry about me.
Everything is gonna be oka.
I got a big appointment this afternoon, if I could just find it.
They don't put addresses on any of the buildings here.
kept talking about was glory days well, they'll pass you by Ah that's 1600.
This is so cool! Glory da-a-a-ys glory days well, they'll pass you by glory days in the wink of a young girl's eye Glory days glory da-a-a-ys well, they'll pass you by glory days in the wink of a young girl's eye Glory days glory da-a-a-ys - [MAN.]
Sit, ubu, sit.
Good dog.
- [UBU BARKS.]