Beverly Hills, 90210 (1990) s04e27 Episode Script
Divas
- Oh, hey, Bren.
- Hey.
- Working hard? - I think so.
I'm auditioning for Roy Randolph.
Ever hear of him? Yes, actually, when I was 12, my mom took me to New York City.
We saw his production of A Streetcar Named Desire.
Starred Holly Hunter before she was a big star.
It was pretty awesome.
Yeah, he's known for having an eye for young talent.
And you are hoping to catch that, huh? But of course.
He's directing a main-stage production of Cat on a Hot Tin Roof.
I mean, can't you see me in the Maggie role? Now that you mention it, I do see you as kind of a young Liz, minus the eight marriages, give or take a Richard Burton.
Thank you.
Anyway, I better get going.
The ladies of the Peach Pit are waiting.
Yeah, you know what, I'm gonna go there myself, but I gotta pick up some books for Erica.
What is she reading these days? The Man Who Shot Lincoln, The Lincoln Murder Mystery, The Unsolved Lincoln Murder Case.
Do I see a pattern here? Yeah, my little sister's quite the conspiracy buff.
Wait ten minutes, I'll give you a ride.
No, thanks.
If I'm late for these sorority meetings, I get demerits.
- Yeah, see you.
- Bye.
Andrea, don't be so hard on yourself.
Well, I think you look great in Jesse's clothes.
It's very stylish.
Yeah, well, with our budget, I'm just lucky grunge is in.
You guys, the way I'm expanding, in the next couple of weeks, I won't even fit into his clothes.
It's so depressing.
It's settled.
I'm gonna go and get you some of Jackie's old maternity dresses.
- She still has them? - She never throws anything away.
She'd be glad to let you wear them for as long as you want.
Kel, that's great.
Who's that guy over there with Dylan's sister and her mom? - I don't know.
- I don't know.
Oh, come on, it will be my treat.
- How about a milkshake? - No.
- Are you sure? - I said I don't want one.
Erica, how about trying "no, thank you"? No, thank you.
Excuse me.
Excuse me, Kelly, have you seen Dylan? He was supposed to meet us here.
He's at the library.
I just ran into him.
He's on his way over.
Well, enjoy your sorority meeting.
So, what is this sorority? Well, after we graduated from West Beverly, we didn't want college life to split us up.
So we have these little gatherings here once a week, so we can all see each other.
Oh, so I guess you had to go to West Beverly to be in your sorority? Well, maybe not.
I don't know about the rest of you, but I think a little pledge rush might be in order.
I think maybe so.
Sit down.
Great, what do I have to do? You have to promise to be a good friend.
And you can never, ever, ever forget your sisters.
And not be afraid to dish a little dirt.
Starting with who is that guy with your mom over there? Her new boyfriend.
I never liked any of my mom's boyfriends either.
Hey, Nat, any words of wisdom on why Communism fell? I think it had something to do with 90-proof vodka.
- Can I quote you on that? - Sure.
Guess who? A little help here, Nat.
Oh, I've never seen her before, but I wouldn't mind seeing her again.
Too late, time's up.
- Clare.
- Hi.
Hi.
Nat, this is Clare Arnold.
Her father, besides being the head of the Educational Task Force, is also the esteemed chancellor of CU.
Oh, privileged to meet you.
Likewise.
My father's secretary said this is where you hang out.
And shock of shocks, she was right about something.
Well, you certainly seem chipper today.
Oh, well, I had my birthday last week.
The big 1-8.
Oh, congratulations.
Yeah, somehow, magically, overnight the words "jailbait" just kind of vanished from my forehead.
Voilà.
Well, it was nice seeing you again, Clare.
I was just leaving.
Great, me too.
Bye.
- Are you all right? - Oh, that depends on you.
How so? What would you say if I wanted to go out with you? I'd say I don't think that's a good idea, Clare.
Oh, come on, we'll go to a movie, a club, swap French kisses on a quake-damaged freeway.
I really don't think that's a good idea, Clare.
Why not? I'm legal.
So I hear.
Oh, what, are you, like, freaked out or something because of who my father is? - Absolutely.
- I knew it.
- But you like me, don't you? - Of course.
I like you a lot.
You're very unusual.
Thanks, I wouldn't wanna be like everybody else.
- Well, you're certainly not.
- Oh, that's so sweet.
Hey, Brandon, how's it going? Dylan, this is Clare Arnold, Chancellor Arnold's daughter.
- Oh, yeah, it's nice to meet you, Clare.
- Nice to meet you too.
- Bye, mon chéri.
- Bye.
You taste good.
Listen, mon chéri, I sort of thought after Lucinda, you would be playing the monk about now.
This is much worse than Lucinda.
Take it from a friend, just say whoa.
- I thought I did.
- I don't think she heard you.
I think you're right.
Listen, I gotta get over to Steve's and work on my paper.
Don't tell anyone about this, okay? It's a little gnarly.
No sweat.
Hey, we've been waiting for you.
Well, excuse me.
I'm 15 minutes late for my life.
- This is - You must be Kevin.
- Kevin Weaver.
- Hi.
Dylan McKay.
- It's great to meet you, sit down.
- Okay.
Dylan, come here.
Did you get my books? You'll have to excuse me.
The boss is calling.
You think the boss is ever gonna give me a break, huh? Honey, I can't find my black bathing suit.
I already packed the plaid one, along with your hooded robe.
I look kind of chunky in the plaid.
If we're gonna sit around in a hot spring with the Levins, I wanna look as svelte as they are.
Honestly, I'm sorry we bid on this vacation with them.
Oh, come on, it's for a good cause.
Anyway, two days in Palm Desert, away from the grind could be very romantic.
I hope you're not saying that just because it's tax deductible.
- I'm not gonna forget that comment.
- I'm counting on it.
Brenda, would you come put away these pots? Why certainly, Mama.
Although I was born for more than the kitchen work.
Weren't we all? How's my southern drawl? Oh, it's very Tennessee Williams.
I hope you're not putting too much pressure on yourself about this play.
Mom, how could I? I mean, working with Roy Randolph is a chance of a lifetime for any actress.
And let's face it, that's what I wanna be.
I know, I just wish you didn't have your heart set on the lead.
I mean, isn't there maybe a smaller part? Thanks for the encouragement.
I'm sorry, I just don't want you to be disappointed.
Mom, I won't be.
I am Maggie the Cat.
A woman scorned by the man that she loves? I understand the character completely.
Well, I'll be crossing my fingers for you.
Thanks.
I hope you guys have fun.
Oh, we will.
Oh, listen, while you're housesitting for the Levins Mom, don't worry.
I'm just across the street, and I have their cats.
And Kelly's coming over for the afternoon to practice lines.
Kelly is? Yeah, I guess when all is said and done, she really cares about maintaining our friendship.
That's great.
Yeah, it is.
You know, I think I'm finally in the college groove.
It's just a matter of narrowing down my distractions.
Well, cutting down on the booze and the babes is always a formula for success.
No, I'm talking about late-night television.
Jay, Dave, Conan, who needs these people? And Nightline, Ted Koppel.
Every time I see this guy's face, I gotta wonder if he has legs.
Think anybody's ever seen them? Don't ask me, bro.
At that hour, I'm studying.
Oh, I think you need to take a lap, Walsh.
Yeah, I'll see you later, citizen.
Ride free.
Ciao.
Oh, out of order? Stop it, you monsters.
Somebody help me! Go away, you! - Steve.
- Laura.
What are you doing here? I heard somebody screaming.
I thought someone was in trouble.
Obviously, I was wrong.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I guess I was a little loud.
I was just acting.
I'm getting myself ready to try out for this play.
Well, I'd say if there's any screaming, you'll do fine.
See you.
Wait, please.
You just startled me.
I shouldn't have snapped at you.
You were just being concerned.
Yeah, I thought so.
Bye.
Steve.
I've seen you around campus.
But I must admit, I try pretty hard to avoid you.
Yeah, well, for whatever it's worth, I still don't feel right about what you went through.
Yeah, well, it's been a pretty miserable, lonely year for me.
I guess that's why I'm working so hard on this play, you know.
I'm hoping maybe it will turn things around.
Cat On A Hot Tin Roof.
You know, before my mother became the mother of all sitcoms, she actually had the lead in a production they did here in L.
A.
Really? I'm reading for the lead.
Oh, yeah? It's a great play.
Gosh, I must've seen it a hundred times.
I was practically living in her dressing room.
Your mom is really talented.
Thanks.
I'll tell her you said so.
You know, the last time that we spoke was after that crazy week.
You offered to still be my friend, but I couldn't handle it then.
I don't know what I'm trying to say.
You know, I don't know how this is gonna sound, Laura, but If you like a hand with your audition material, I guess I'd be happy to help you out.
- Would you? - Yeah, I figure I owe you one.
That I could definitely handle.
Thanks.
Heigh-ho, Silver.
What's happening? Hell, man.
Big workload? No, school's fine.
It's the stupid dog.
He chews through the electrical cords, I'm the one who gets blamed.
He rips through the garbage, I get yelled at.
Bad puppy.
What's taking your sister so long with my yogurt? Oh, excuse me.
Oh, my God, you're Roy Randolph.
Well, I suppose that's the proper billing: God before Roy.
But normally, I'm used to my name being above the title.
I didn't spill anything on you, did I? No, no harm done.
But I suggest you try walking without reading.
Well, I was just really trying to understand the play.
Oh, are you studying it for class, or are you reading for me tomorrow? For you, the part of Maggie.
Really? Well, I like her fetching, love-starved and dangerous.
Those are the only hints I'll give you.
You know, I have to tell you, I'm a tremendous fan of yours.
In fact, when I found out you were gonna be our artist-in-residence, I went to the library and studied all about you.
Well, it's nice meeting you.
Brenda, Brenda Walsh.
Till tomorrow.
Yeah, and no more walking and reading.
That's right.
Nothing should inhibit the moves of a dangerous woman.
I'll remember that.
Bravo.
Good puppy.
That was the director.
Looks like you scored.
Well, I'd say all you need is a helmet and an open highway.
Yeah, if I don't get this thing out on the road soon, the engine's gonna rot.
You know, Suzanne, I was gonna call you last night.
It's about the guy, Kevin.
I like him.
Me too.
I only wish Erica were a little less hostile toward him.
Yeah, I did get the impression she's not really his biggest fan.
Such a shame.
He's really a terrific guy.
He treats me like a lady.
He's got a good job.
Did he tell you he's an environmental chemist? - No.
- He's such a good soul.
I'm just afraid that Erica's gonna scare him off.
Would you like me to talk to her, Suzanne? Yes, that's exactly what I want.
You happen to be in luck, for that is one of my favorite pastimes.
- Hey, Bran.
- Hey, Steve.
I'm gonna meet up with a couple of guys at the gym.
Down for a little half-court action? No can do.
I got called in to see the chancellor.
What about tonight? We still on for the soc.
Paper? Actually, I got a change of plans.
I told Laura Kingman I'd help her out with something.
Laura Kingman, the girl who almost accused you of date rape? What's the matter? Did your pilot light go out? Hey, we're just in a study mode.
And besides, I'm capable of having a mature relationship with a girl without involving bodily functions.
Steve, it's so rare I hear you use the word "mature.
" I'm impressed.
Well, perhaps, you're rubbing off on me.
I don't think so.
I just wanna see things go good for this girl.
She's auditioning for this play.
Yeah, Brenda's auditioning for it too.
- About her and a zillion other girls.
- Yeah, good luck, my brother.
And hey, you watch yourself around Laura.
I'll do my best.
He doesn't have a name.
He doesn't exist, does he, Maggie? He does.
You can't conceive by a man who won't sleep with you.
Oh, he exists all right.
And so does my child, Brick's baby.
That's great, you've really got her.
- Better? - Yeah.
I mean, this is my chance to be in a great play, in a great part, with a great director.
I don't wanna blow it.
You won't.
You're gonna be very well-rehearsed.
Well, I had help.
You know, I have to say, you read the Mae part incredibly.
So what? It was fun.
I guess I can play frumpy people.
It's called playing against type.
You should try out.
No, that's silly.
I don't have the theater experience that you do.
Well, from everything that I've read about Randolph, he likes raw talent.
Besides, Mae is a small part.
You could totally handle it.
- You really think so? - Yeah.
And it would be terrific to do it together, wouldn't it? Yeah.
I used to love acting, up until the sixth-grade play when I froze in front of the whole school.
You didn't have any problem speaking to the crowd at Take Back the Night Week.
You really think I could do it? Yes, and just by auditioning, you would get to meet one of the true giants of the theater.
He does sound fascinating.
I think your ride's here.
Hey, ladies, how's it going? We were just taking our curtain call.
- So are you ready to go now? - Yep.
- I'll see you guys later.
- All right.
Hey, guess what.
I'm thinking of maybe trying out for the play too.
There's a small part and Brenda thinks maybe I should try for it.
What, you? You don't think I could do it? Oh, quite the contrary, I think you can do anything you set your mind to.
I'm just glad you and Bren are getting along.
Me too.
Chancellor Arnold, Brandon Walsh is here to see you.
Send him in.
Good morning.
Brandon, good to see you.
Sit.
Thanks.
Is something the matter? No.
Well, maybe yes.
It seems the Department of Education has done a paper on our task force.
You mean, they're actually taking us seriously? Apparently.
I haven't read it, but Daddy, I was just wondering when we're leaving? We're supposed to be at the museum at noon.
Very soon.
You remember Brandon, don't you? From the retreat? Oh, right.
Hi.
Hi, Clare.
Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt.
Anyway, Brandon, as I was saying, it's important for us to know how we're perceived.
I want you to digest that report and give me a critique quickly.
No problem, I've got my house to myself for the next couple days, so I'll get right on it.
I was hoping you'd say that.
Have a splendid day.
Thank you, sir.
You too.
Bye.
Brick, how long does it have to go on? This punishment? Haven't I done enough time? Can't I apply for a pardon? Oh, Maggie, you're spoiling my liquor.
Lately, your voice always sounds like you'd been running upstairs to warn somebody the house is on fire.
Well, no wonder.
You know what I feel like? I feel all the time like a cat on a hot tin roof.
Well, maybe you should get a lover.
I can't see any man but you.
Easy, Laura.
Even with my eyes closed, I just see you.
Why don't you get ugly, Brick? Why don't you please get fat, or ugly, or something so I could stand it? And that's when Maggie kisses Brick.
That's when Brick resists it.
It says right here on the script.
Oh, sorry.
No, as Maggie, I just wanted to see what it would be like.
Well, it's good, it's a strong choice.
It works for the character.
So how am I doing? Great.
You're getting better with every scene.
Thanks to my coach.
Well, it's my pleasure, Miss Maggie.
- Hey, Andrea, it's Donna and David.
- And Rocky II.
- Hi, guys.
- Hey.
Rocky, you know better than that.
I'm sorry, Andrea.
Oh, no, it's the most excitement I've had in days.
He sure is frisky.
Yeah, he's a four-legged Prozac moment.
He's just a happy puppy.
Well, he'd be a lot easier to take around if you taught him some discipline.
Well, he's still young, he doesn't know all the rules yet.
So, what, until then, he's just gonna tear our house apart? Look, let's save this till we get home.
Parenting problems, huh? I guess this is what we have in store for us, huh, Andrea? Well, I agree with Donna.
He's just a baby.
He'll get manners when he needs some.
Gee, I wish I could stay, but constitutional law is calling.
Bye, my love.
- Bye, my love.
- Bye.
Be home for dinner.
Hey, hey, hey.
Rocky, that wasn't very nice.
Can I get you guys something to drink? Oh, well, actually, we came by to give you something special.
It's Jackie's clothes, Kelly got them.
Here, try one on.
Oh, these are adorable.
They're just like all the baby-doll dresses we're all wearing.
Jackie says they fit all throughout her pregnancy.
I'm gonna try it on.
- Can you just help me in the back? - Yeah.
There.
Oh, it's a little too tight.
These things aren't gonna fit.
Well, it doesn't matter what you look like.
The important thing is, you have a really big baby inside of you.
I hate this.
I just have to stop eating.
It's okay.
Good luck.
Good afternoon.
I'm Roy Randolph.
And I'm heartened to see so many eager faces here.
This may look to you like a cattle call, but I can assure you, you will not be treated like cattle.
We're planning on having a good day here, aren't we, Eddie? For me, any day above ground is a good day.
Eddie's been my stage manager for many years, and a Broadway fixture for decades.
But before any of you starts getting too nervous, please, I want to assure you, these auditions will be free of your usual drama-club politics.
I don't care who you are or what you've done before.
Everyone's got a chance.
Please, cross and get your number.
Kelly Taylor.
All I ask is for you to be patient.
It's gonna be a long process to give everyone a fair shot.
So with that understood, let's begin.
Numbers one to five, follow me.
I didn't think that you were gonna make it.
I couldn't decide what to wear.
Do you see that girl that Steve's with? - Isn't that? - My God, it is, that's Laura Kingman.
Well, they certainly seem to have patched things up.
Well, she's definitely bent enough to be a Maggie.
All I know is that everybody here looks a lot more theatrical than I do.
Oh, you're gonna be fine.
And sometimes, it's better to be last.
Well, I brought my psych book to pass the time.
I didn't know that Roy Randolph was so cute.
Oh, yes.
And you know, he has a thing for his actresses.
Really? Yes, he is known for saying: "All I need out of life is a rehearsal studio and a bedroom, preferably attached.
" Coming.
- Clare.
- Can I come in? - Sure.
- Oh, this is such a comfy room.
So, what's going on? What's it look like, silly? It's my overnight bag.
Clare, wait a second I didn't want you to be all alone.
Well, thanks, but you can't stay here.
Well, I have nowhere else to go.
I mean, my father's out of town, and he thinks I'm staying over at a friend's, so So why aren't you there? What's the rush? What do you have in this bag? Everything I'm into.
Sex, rock, really decent literature.
You? I'm into finishing the report for your father.
And that's gonna take me all night.
That's no problem, just go right ahead.
I'm not gonna bug you.
Look, Clare, this just isn't gonna work.
Fine.
Why don't you just, like, throw me out on the street, okay? I'll hitch down to the beach.
Probably get in some rotted-out muscle car with a bunch of deviants, but, hey, whatever, you know, it's okay.
Oh, that's not gonna happen because I'm driving you over to your friend's.
Well, they're not gonna be back until after 10.
They went to a movie.
Call if you want, okay? Am I repulsive or something? No, no, not at all.
It's just I kind of feel I owe it to your father to keep a little distance here.
Brandon, it's not like I'm under surveillance, you know.
Okay, you can stay down here by yourself till you get bored.
But if 10:00 rolls around before that, you are going to your friend's house, okay? Okay.
Well, if it isn't my favorite little bookworm.
You reading those books I got you? Yeah, my favorite is The Unsolved Lincoln Murder Case.
It's the one that claims William Seward, the secretary of state, is behind it.
I see, well, it sounds like a good scandal.
I'm gonna have to read that sometime.
You should.
So why'd you wanna see me? It's about Kevin, right? Sometimes I forget how sharp you can be.
Yeah, it's about Kevin.
I met him, and although I don't know him very well, he seems okay, I like him.
I think you would too if you give him half a chance.
Doubt it.
Well, has he ever done anything mean to you? No, of course not.
Then, what's the problem? He reminds me of Lewis Payne.
Lewis Payne? You know, John Wilkes Booth's getaway driver.
He was good-looking, but he had the mind of a 10-year old.
Erica I just wish Mom didn't have to have a boyfriend.
Why is that? What if they got married? He lives in Orange County.
I might never get to see you again.
Hey, that's not gonna happen.
She's not gonna get married? Well, they just met.
But nothing is gonna split us up.
Wherever you go, we're always gonna be close, all right? I'm not gonna lose the only little sister I've got.
Yeah, I guess I just needed to hear that.
Then do me a favor, will you? Cut Kevin some slack? Well, I'm gonna get me a choice one.
And I don't care how much she costs.
I'm going to strip her naked, and smother her in minks, and choke her in diamonds.
Well, at least he's got the size to play Big Daddy.
I'll strip her naked, and choke her with Smother her Strip Thank you very much.
Couldn't I just have a second chance? It's my experience that second chances are never as good as the first.
Feel good.
You did just fine.
Next.
Name, please.
Brenda Walsh.
That's correct.
I'm reading for the part of Maggie.
And I'll be doing a monologue from Act 1.
Start when you're ready.
Brick, I'm not trying to whitewash my behavior.
I'm no good.
I don't know why people try and pretend to be good.
Nobody's good.
But I'm honest.
Give me credit for that, will you, please? Mournful, graceful.
She's got the fire, Eddie, and the desperation.
She's all right.
You know, sometimes, I think you agreed to this gig just so you could get close to all these 18-year-old actresses.
Skipper is dead.
I'm alive.
Maggie the Cat is alive.
I'm alive.
Hello.
Hi, Steve.
No, I don't wanna hear how well Laura's audition went.
Well, you've gotta give credit where credit is due.
I snuck in and I saw her.
Now, I don't mean to toot my own horn, but, buddy, I really got her performance up to speed.
Well, I'm glad you're such a talented guy, but I'm fighting to finish my work here.
It's been a little distracting.
What was that? Did you just giggle? No, I don't giggle.
I belch, but I definitely do not giggle.
Clare, will you get off the phone? The distraction I was mentioning.
Clare? Is she cute? Dangerously cute.
Can't get my mind off her.
She got the body of a centerfold and the personality of a volcano.
Well, give her what she wants, pal.
She's the chancellor's daughter, Steve, all I want is for her to get I gotta go.
This must be your traveling outfit, huh? Well, that's what I came to tell you.
You know that friend that Daddy thinks I'm staying over with? Actually, she's kind of staying over with a guy of her own.
So I don't really have anywhere to stay.
Brandon, you home? Stay put.
Hi, how was your audition? Oh, it was amazing.
I wouldn't have changed a thing.
What was Steve doing there with Laura Kingman? He's just helping her out.
It's no big deal.
Does he know we're going for the same part? So what? What's important is you said your tryout went well.
You're right.
It absolutely did.
- Although I kind of feel bad for Kelly.
- Kelly? Yeah, she was still waiting for her turn when I finally had to leave to go feed the Levins' cats.
Well, it probably just wasn't meant to happen.
You know, those cats must be pretty hungry.
Obviously, you're in a rush.
Working? Trying.
- Well, call if you get lonely.
- I will.
You said, "Stay put.
" Yeah.
That's it.
You gotta go.
I don't know where you're going, but you're going.
Where's the key? You won't find it in there.
It's hidden on me somewhere.
Try your luck.
I got a better idea.
You wanna spend the night here, fine.
Good night.
Brandon? Next.
Cover for me, Eddie.
Excuse me.
- Where are you going? - Home.
But you've waited so long.
You're not going to try out? No, I really have no business being here.
And actually, I was just doing this as a favor to a friend.
I see, well, maybe what you say is true, but I've waited all day to hear you read.
You're teasing me.
A little, but I'm not gonna let you go.
No one ever walks out of my auditions.
I hardly have any acting experience.
Well, maybe that's what I was responding to.
That certain freshness and fear.
Well, you've got the fear thing right.
The closer I was to auditioning, the more I was scared to death.
Look, I'm sure you have to get back inside, but it was nice to meet you.
Hold on.
I really want to see you on stage.
Humor me? I really think you're gonna be disappointed.
Well, let me be the judge of that.
- I'm Roy.
- Kelly Taylor.
Shall we? Donna, he did it again.
Where? On the paper? No, it's on the floor.
Give him to me.
Not if you're gonna rub his nose in it.
Donna, it's the only way he's gonna learn.
Maybe in your house, but in my house, we just put more paper down.
Okay, fine, why don't we go wall-to-wall paper? How about that? Why don't we put plastic on the furniture so he doesn't mistake it for a chew toy? He'll grow out of it.
He just needs to learn at his own speed.
You'll see.
Here, Rocky, you go on the paper.
You see, right here, yeah.
Rocky's toilet, how can I help you? Hi, David, is Kelly there? Yeah, she's right here, hold on.
- It's Brenda.
- Thanks.
- Hey.
- Hey.
You know, if you're tired of living in a kennel, you can always bunk in with me.
I might just do that.
Sorry I didn't get back to you last night.
I got your message, but by the time I got home from the audition, it was so late, I just crashed.
But you got to try out? Good, I'm glad.
Unfortunately, by the time I got on stage, I was so nervous.
But I'm glad I hung in there.
It was an interesting experience.
Well, word is that there's gonna be a list posted for callbacks around 11:00.
- It will be the big cut down.
- Do you think you have a chance? Don't even ask.
I don't wanna get my hopes up.
I'm gonna head over to the campus now.
Wanna meet me? I don't think so, I'm still on dream time.
But good luck, I'll be thinking of you.
Okay, I'll see you later.
- All right.
- Bye.
You tell Brenda you read for the lead? Now, please, he only did that because he felt sorry for me - because I'd been waiting so long - Kel.
Don't tell David, please.
Sure.
Are you expecting someone? Yeah, my cab.
School time.
So I guess I've been saved by the bell.
You didn't happen to molest me while I was sleeping, did you? No, I didn't.
I guess it was a dream.
Listen, Clare, normally, I'm not such a Boy Scout.
But I'm afraid with you, I'll just have to say goodbye and good luck.
Well, I had fun anyway.
I wanted to spend the night with a college guy, and I did.
Kind of.
Anything to take the suckiness out of a boring week.
I gotta go.
We'll do it again.
No, we won't.
I'm afraid this is it.
Oh, yeah? Or what, you'll tell my father? Goodbye.
Tell him.
He'll never believe you.
Why are you doing this, Clare? Because I like you.
Like I said, everything looks good.
The baby's really active.
That is amazing.
So there's nothing wrong with the ultrasound? Nothing wrong.
Normally, I wouldn't have done one of these, but you seemed so upset.
Well, thank you.
I'm glad you did.
- You can get dressed now.
- Thanks.
And the baby's growth is on target? The size of the head is right where it should be.
What about my weight? Well, we took your fundal growth, and though it's on the high side of the curve, it's not abnormal.
A lot of women gain excessive weight for their first pregnancy.
That's exactly what I told her, Dr.
Haller.
No, that is not what you said.
You said that my body chemistry is out of whack.
Just try and relax.
By next month, you'll be ready for Lamaze.
We're looking forward to that.
Well, what about my family history of diabetes? Couldn't there be complications? We've been on top of it right from the beginning.
You have nothing to worry about.
Great.
Cheer up.
I'll see you before you go.
Thanks, doc.
Thank you.
You think I'm just crying wolf, don't you? No, no, I don't.
It's just that we have to get a grip on things.
Ultrasounds are very expensive.
Insurance is only gonna cover so many.
Fine.
Thousands of women have babies every day.
Jesse, I'm not thousands of women.
Look, this is my body.
Call it mother's instinct, whatever you want.
I know something's wrong.
I can just feel it.
Thank you, Dylan.
Whatever you said to Erica, boy, did it work.
First time she didn't give me the evil eye.
Well, I guess she'd been doing so much reading on the conspiracy theory, that her mind was a little tangled.
So next time, I'll give her the complete set of The Baby-sitters Club.
Hey, look, I gotta get to work, okay? - Yeah, I better hit the beach.
- You a waterman? Dylan, didn't tell you he surfed? - You too? - No, yeah.
I mean, I'm getting older, but I still catch my share.
Thanks to a little high technology.
What technology? You got some kind of edge? Well, I just fitted this little sonar gizmo into an old board of mine, and it really works.
It measures the wave speed and the size of the swell.
It sort of takes the guesswork out of it for the mature ripper.
This I gotta see.
Well, come on.
My Jeep's just across the street.
Okay.
Dana Point was my home beach as a kid.
Man, it was really something, before the building boom killed the break.
It must have been epic.
No pollution, no lineups.
Not every day was paradise then.
There were always some kind of local hassles to get your attention.
- Yeah? - It was crazy stuff, man.
I remember this one time, man.
Kevin! Talk about a wipeout, man.
You all right? Thanks.
Hey, I don't know what I would've done if I lost you.
What would I have told Suzanne or Erica? I'll tell you this, man.
You just made a pal for life.
Oh, no.
I can't believe it.
Oh, my God, I can't believe it.
Congratulations.
I got called back? - Me too.
- Congratulations.
Thanks, it's down to five for the lead.
You, me and Kelly Taylor made the cut.
Kelly Taylor? That's impossible.
For Maggie the Cat, are you sure? Yeah, positive, why? Didn't you know she was going for it? She told me she was reading for Mae.
Well, this guy on the lighting crew said that she's a natural Maggie.
He heard that she's the front-runner.
Well, bye.
Of course, I'm sure it didn't hurt that she went out with Mr.
Randolph for cappuccino afterwards.
- What? - You didn't know that either? Yeah, well, with friends like that, who needs enemies? Good luck.
- Hey.
- Working hard? - I think so.
I'm auditioning for Roy Randolph.
Ever hear of him? Yes, actually, when I was 12, my mom took me to New York City.
We saw his production of A Streetcar Named Desire.
Starred Holly Hunter before she was a big star.
It was pretty awesome.
Yeah, he's known for having an eye for young talent.
And you are hoping to catch that, huh? But of course.
He's directing a main-stage production of Cat on a Hot Tin Roof.
I mean, can't you see me in the Maggie role? Now that you mention it, I do see you as kind of a young Liz, minus the eight marriages, give or take a Richard Burton.
Thank you.
Anyway, I better get going.
The ladies of the Peach Pit are waiting.
Yeah, you know what, I'm gonna go there myself, but I gotta pick up some books for Erica.
What is she reading these days? The Man Who Shot Lincoln, The Lincoln Murder Mystery, The Unsolved Lincoln Murder Case.
Do I see a pattern here? Yeah, my little sister's quite the conspiracy buff.
Wait ten minutes, I'll give you a ride.
No, thanks.
If I'm late for these sorority meetings, I get demerits.
- Yeah, see you.
- Bye.
Andrea, don't be so hard on yourself.
Well, I think you look great in Jesse's clothes.
It's very stylish.
Yeah, well, with our budget, I'm just lucky grunge is in.
You guys, the way I'm expanding, in the next couple of weeks, I won't even fit into his clothes.
It's so depressing.
It's settled.
I'm gonna go and get you some of Jackie's old maternity dresses.
- She still has them? - She never throws anything away.
She'd be glad to let you wear them for as long as you want.
Kel, that's great.
Who's that guy over there with Dylan's sister and her mom? - I don't know.
- I don't know.
Oh, come on, it will be my treat.
- How about a milkshake? - No.
- Are you sure? - I said I don't want one.
Erica, how about trying "no, thank you"? No, thank you.
Excuse me.
Excuse me, Kelly, have you seen Dylan? He was supposed to meet us here.
He's at the library.
I just ran into him.
He's on his way over.
Well, enjoy your sorority meeting.
So, what is this sorority? Well, after we graduated from West Beverly, we didn't want college life to split us up.
So we have these little gatherings here once a week, so we can all see each other.
Oh, so I guess you had to go to West Beverly to be in your sorority? Well, maybe not.
I don't know about the rest of you, but I think a little pledge rush might be in order.
I think maybe so.
Sit down.
Great, what do I have to do? You have to promise to be a good friend.
And you can never, ever, ever forget your sisters.
And not be afraid to dish a little dirt.
Starting with who is that guy with your mom over there? Her new boyfriend.
I never liked any of my mom's boyfriends either.
Hey, Nat, any words of wisdom on why Communism fell? I think it had something to do with 90-proof vodka.
- Can I quote you on that? - Sure.
Guess who? A little help here, Nat.
Oh, I've never seen her before, but I wouldn't mind seeing her again.
Too late, time's up.
- Clare.
- Hi.
Hi.
Nat, this is Clare Arnold.
Her father, besides being the head of the Educational Task Force, is also the esteemed chancellor of CU.
Oh, privileged to meet you.
Likewise.
My father's secretary said this is where you hang out.
And shock of shocks, she was right about something.
Well, you certainly seem chipper today.
Oh, well, I had my birthday last week.
The big 1-8.
Oh, congratulations.
Yeah, somehow, magically, overnight the words "jailbait" just kind of vanished from my forehead.
Voilà.
Well, it was nice seeing you again, Clare.
I was just leaving.
Great, me too.
Bye.
- Are you all right? - Oh, that depends on you.
How so? What would you say if I wanted to go out with you? I'd say I don't think that's a good idea, Clare.
Oh, come on, we'll go to a movie, a club, swap French kisses on a quake-damaged freeway.
I really don't think that's a good idea, Clare.
Why not? I'm legal.
So I hear.
Oh, what, are you, like, freaked out or something because of who my father is? - Absolutely.
- I knew it.
- But you like me, don't you? - Of course.
I like you a lot.
You're very unusual.
Thanks, I wouldn't wanna be like everybody else.
- Well, you're certainly not.
- Oh, that's so sweet.
Hey, Brandon, how's it going? Dylan, this is Clare Arnold, Chancellor Arnold's daughter.
- Oh, yeah, it's nice to meet you, Clare.
- Nice to meet you too.
- Bye, mon chéri.
- Bye.
You taste good.
Listen, mon chéri, I sort of thought after Lucinda, you would be playing the monk about now.
This is much worse than Lucinda.
Take it from a friend, just say whoa.
- I thought I did.
- I don't think she heard you.
I think you're right.
Listen, I gotta get over to Steve's and work on my paper.
Don't tell anyone about this, okay? It's a little gnarly.
No sweat.
Hey, we've been waiting for you.
Well, excuse me.
I'm 15 minutes late for my life.
- This is - You must be Kevin.
- Kevin Weaver.
- Hi.
Dylan McKay.
- It's great to meet you, sit down.
- Okay.
Dylan, come here.
Did you get my books? You'll have to excuse me.
The boss is calling.
You think the boss is ever gonna give me a break, huh? Honey, I can't find my black bathing suit.
I already packed the plaid one, along with your hooded robe.
I look kind of chunky in the plaid.
If we're gonna sit around in a hot spring with the Levins, I wanna look as svelte as they are.
Honestly, I'm sorry we bid on this vacation with them.
Oh, come on, it's for a good cause.
Anyway, two days in Palm Desert, away from the grind could be very romantic.
I hope you're not saying that just because it's tax deductible.
- I'm not gonna forget that comment.
- I'm counting on it.
Brenda, would you come put away these pots? Why certainly, Mama.
Although I was born for more than the kitchen work.
Weren't we all? How's my southern drawl? Oh, it's very Tennessee Williams.
I hope you're not putting too much pressure on yourself about this play.
Mom, how could I? I mean, working with Roy Randolph is a chance of a lifetime for any actress.
And let's face it, that's what I wanna be.
I know, I just wish you didn't have your heart set on the lead.
I mean, isn't there maybe a smaller part? Thanks for the encouragement.
I'm sorry, I just don't want you to be disappointed.
Mom, I won't be.
I am Maggie the Cat.
A woman scorned by the man that she loves? I understand the character completely.
Well, I'll be crossing my fingers for you.
Thanks.
I hope you guys have fun.
Oh, we will.
Oh, listen, while you're housesitting for the Levins Mom, don't worry.
I'm just across the street, and I have their cats.
And Kelly's coming over for the afternoon to practice lines.
Kelly is? Yeah, I guess when all is said and done, she really cares about maintaining our friendship.
That's great.
Yeah, it is.
You know, I think I'm finally in the college groove.
It's just a matter of narrowing down my distractions.
Well, cutting down on the booze and the babes is always a formula for success.
No, I'm talking about late-night television.
Jay, Dave, Conan, who needs these people? And Nightline, Ted Koppel.
Every time I see this guy's face, I gotta wonder if he has legs.
Think anybody's ever seen them? Don't ask me, bro.
At that hour, I'm studying.
Oh, I think you need to take a lap, Walsh.
Yeah, I'll see you later, citizen.
Ride free.
Ciao.
Oh, out of order? Stop it, you monsters.
Somebody help me! Go away, you! - Steve.
- Laura.
What are you doing here? I heard somebody screaming.
I thought someone was in trouble.
Obviously, I was wrong.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I guess I was a little loud.
I was just acting.
I'm getting myself ready to try out for this play.
Well, I'd say if there's any screaming, you'll do fine.
See you.
Wait, please.
You just startled me.
I shouldn't have snapped at you.
You were just being concerned.
Yeah, I thought so.
Bye.
Steve.
I've seen you around campus.
But I must admit, I try pretty hard to avoid you.
Yeah, well, for whatever it's worth, I still don't feel right about what you went through.
Yeah, well, it's been a pretty miserable, lonely year for me.
I guess that's why I'm working so hard on this play, you know.
I'm hoping maybe it will turn things around.
Cat On A Hot Tin Roof.
You know, before my mother became the mother of all sitcoms, she actually had the lead in a production they did here in L.
A.
Really? I'm reading for the lead.
Oh, yeah? It's a great play.
Gosh, I must've seen it a hundred times.
I was practically living in her dressing room.
Your mom is really talented.
Thanks.
I'll tell her you said so.
You know, the last time that we spoke was after that crazy week.
You offered to still be my friend, but I couldn't handle it then.
I don't know what I'm trying to say.
You know, I don't know how this is gonna sound, Laura, but If you like a hand with your audition material, I guess I'd be happy to help you out.
- Would you? - Yeah, I figure I owe you one.
That I could definitely handle.
Thanks.
Heigh-ho, Silver.
What's happening? Hell, man.
Big workload? No, school's fine.
It's the stupid dog.
He chews through the electrical cords, I'm the one who gets blamed.
He rips through the garbage, I get yelled at.
Bad puppy.
What's taking your sister so long with my yogurt? Oh, excuse me.
Oh, my God, you're Roy Randolph.
Well, I suppose that's the proper billing: God before Roy.
But normally, I'm used to my name being above the title.
I didn't spill anything on you, did I? No, no harm done.
But I suggest you try walking without reading.
Well, I was just really trying to understand the play.
Oh, are you studying it for class, or are you reading for me tomorrow? For you, the part of Maggie.
Really? Well, I like her fetching, love-starved and dangerous.
Those are the only hints I'll give you.
You know, I have to tell you, I'm a tremendous fan of yours.
In fact, when I found out you were gonna be our artist-in-residence, I went to the library and studied all about you.
Well, it's nice meeting you.
Brenda, Brenda Walsh.
Till tomorrow.
Yeah, and no more walking and reading.
That's right.
Nothing should inhibit the moves of a dangerous woman.
I'll remember that.
Bravo.
Good puppy.
That was the director.
Looks like you scored.
Well, I'd say all you need is a helmet and an open highway.
Yeah, if I don't get this thing out on the road soon, the engine's gonna rot.
You know, Suzanne, I was gonna call you last night.
It's about the guy, Kevin.
I like him.
Me too.
I only wish Erica were a little less hostile toward him.
Yeah, I did get the impression she's not really his biggest fan.
Such a shame.
He's really a terrific guy.
He treats me like a lady.
He's got a good job.
Did he tell you he's an environmental chemist? - No.
- He's such a good soul.
I'm just afraid that Erica's gonna scare him off.
Would you like me to talk to her, Suzanne? Yes, that's exactly what I want.
You happen to be in luck, for that is one of my favorite pastimes.
- Hey, Bran.
- Hey, Steve.
I'm gonna meet up with a couple of guys at the gym.
Down for a little half-court action? No can do.
I got called in to see the chancellor.
What about tonight? We still on for the soc.
Paper? Actually, I got a change of plans.
I told Laura Kingman I'd help her out with something.
Laura Kingman, the girl who almost accused you of date rape? What's the matter? Did your pilot light go out? Hey, we're just in a study mode.
And besides, I'm capable of having a mature relationship with a girl without involving bodily functions.
Steve, it's so rare I hear you use the word "mature.
" I'm impressed.
Well, perhaps, you're rubbing off on me.
I don't think so.
I just wanna see things go good for this girl.
She's auditioning for this play.
Yeah, Brenda's auditioning for it too.
- About her and a zillion other girls.
- Yeah, good luck, my brother.
And hey, you watch yourself around Laura.
I'll do my best.
He doesn't have a name.
He doesn't exist, does he, Maggie? He does.
You can't conceive by a man who won't sleep with you.
Oh, he exists all right.
And so does my child, Brick's baby.
That's great, you've really got her.
- Better? - Yeah.
I mean, this is my chance to be in a great play, in a great part, with a great director.
I don't wanna blow it.
You won't.
You're gonna be very well-rehearsed.
Well, I had help.
You know, I have to say, you read the Mae part incredibly.
So what? It was fun.
I guess I can play frumpy people.
It's called playing against type.
You should try out.
No, that's silly.
I don't have the theater experience that you do.
Well, from everything that I've read about Randolph, he likes raw talent.
Besides, Mae is a small part.
You could totally handle it.
- You really think so? - Yeah.
And it would be terrific to do it together, wouldn't it? Yeah.
I used to love acting, up until the sixth-grade play when I froze in front of the whole school.
You didn't have any problem speaking to the crowd at Take Back the Night Week.
You really think I could do it? Yes, and just by auditioning, you would get to meet one of the true giants of the theater.
He does sound fascinating.
I think your ride's here.
Hey, ladies, how's it going? We were just taking our curtain call.
- So are you ready to go now? - Yep.
- I'll see you guys later.
- All right.
Hey, guess what.
I'm thinking of maybe trying out for the play too.
There's a small part and Brenda thinks maybe I should try for it.
What, you? You don't think I could do it? Oh, quite the contrary, I think you can do anything you set your mind to.
I'm just glad you and Bren are getting along.
Me too.
Chancellor Arnold, Brandon Walsh is here to see you.
Send him in.
Good morning.
Brandon, good to see you.
Sit.
Thanks.
Is something the matter? No.
Well, maybe yes.
It seems the Department of Education has done a paper on our task force.
You mean, they're actually taking us seriously? Apparently.
I haven't read it, but Daddy, I was just wondering when we're leaving? We're supposed to be at the museum at noon.
Very soon.
You remember Brandon, don't you? From the retreat? Oh, right.
Hi.
Hi, Clare.
Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt.
Anyway, Brandon, as I was saying, it's important for us to know how we're perceived.
I want you to digest that report and give me a critique quickly.
No problem, I've got my house to myself for the next couple days, so I'll get right on it.
I was hoping you'd say that.
Have a splendid day.
Thank you, sir.
You too.
Bye.
Brick, how long does it have to go on? This punishment? Haven't I done enough time? Can't I apply for a pardon? Oh, Maggie, you're spoiling my liquor.
Lately, your voice always sounds like you'd been running upstairs to warn somebody the house is on fire.
Well, no wonder.
You know what I feel like? I feel all the time like a cat on a hot tin roof.
Well, maybe you should get a lover.
I can't see any man but you.
Easy, Laura.
Even with my eyes closed, I just see you.
Why don't you get ugly, Brick? Why don't you please get fat, or ugly, or something so I could stand it? And that's when Maggie kisses Brick.
That's when Brick resists it.
It says right here on the script.
Oh, sorry.
No, as Maggie, I just wanted to see what it would be like.
Well, it's good, it's a strong choice.
It works for the character.
So how am I doing? Great.
You're getting better with every scene.
Thanks to my coach.
Well, it's my pleasure, Miss Maggie.
- Hey, Andrea, it's Donna and David.
- And Rocky II.
- Hi, guys.
- Hey.
Rocky, you know better than that.
I'm sorry, Andrea.
Oh, no, it's the most excitement I've had in days.
He sure is frisky.
Yeah, he's a four-legged Prozac moment.
He's just a happy puppy.
Well, he'd be a lot easier to take around if you taught him some discipline.
Well, he's still young, he doesn't know all the rules yet.
So, what, until then, he's just gonna tear our house apart? Look, let's save this till we get home.
Parenting problems, huh? I guess this is what we have in store for us, huh, Andrea? Well, I agree with Donna.
He's just a baby.
He'll get manners when he needs some.
Gee, I wish I could stay, but constitutional law is calling.
Bye, my love.
- Bye, my love.
- Bye.
Be home for dinner.
Hey, hey, hey.
Rocky, that wasn't very nice.
Can I get you guys something to drink? Oh, well, actually, we came by to give you something special.
It's Jackie's clothes, Kelly got them.
Here, try one on.
Oh, these are adorable.
They're just like all the baby-doll dresses we're all wearing.
Jackie says they fit all throughout her pregnancy.
I'm gonna try it on.
- Can you just help me in the back? - Yeah.
There.
Oh, it's a little too tight.
These things aren't gonna fit.
Well, it doesn't matter what you look like.
The important thing is, you have a really big baby inside of you.
I hate this.
I just have to stop eating.
It's okay.
Good luck.
Good afternoon.
I'm Roy Randolph.
And I'm heartened to see so many eager faces here.
This may look to you like a cattle call, but I can assure you, you will not be treated like cattle.
We're planning on having a good day here, aren't we, Eddie? For me, any day above ground is a good day.
Eddie's been my stage manager for many years, and a Broadway fixture for decades.
But before any of you starts getting too nervous, please, I want to assure you, these auditions will be free of your usual drama-club politics.
I don't care who you are or what you've done before.
Everyone's got a chance.
Please, cross and get your number.
Kelly Taylor.
All I ask is for you to be patient.
It's gonna be a long process to give everyone a fair shot.
So with that understood, let's begin.
Numbers one to five, follow me.
I didn't think that you were gonna make it.
I couldn't decide what to wear.
Do you see that girl that Steve's with? - Isn't that? - My God, it is, that's Laura Kingman.
Well, they certainly seem to have patched things up.
Well, she's definitely bent enough to be a Maggie.
All I know is that everybody here looks a lot more theatrical than I do.
Oh, you're gonna be fine.
And sometimes, it's better to be last.
Well, I brought my psych book to pass the time.
I didn't know that Roy Randolph was so cute.
Oh, yes.
And you know, he has a thing for his actresses.
Really? Yes, he is known for saying: "All I need out of life is a rehearsal studio and a bedroom, preferably attached.
" Coming.
- Clare.
- Can I come in? - Sure.
- Oh, this is such a comfy room.
So, what's going on? What's it look like, silly? It's my overnight bag.
Clare, wait a second I didn't want you to be all alone.
Well, thanks, but you can't stay here.
Well, I have nowhere else to go.
I mean, my father's out of town, and he thinks I'm staying over at a friend's, so So why aren't you there? What's the rush? What do you have in this bag? Everything I'm into.
Sex, rock, really decent literature.
You? I'm into finishing the report for your father.
And that's gonna take me all night.
That's no problem, just go right ahead.
I'm not gonna bug you.
Look, Clare, this just isn't gonna work.
Fine.
Why don't you just, like, throw me out on the street, okay? I'll hitch down to the beach.
Probably get in some rotted-out muscle car with a bunch of deviants, but, hey, whatever, you know, it's okay.
Oh, that's not gonna happen because I'm driving you over to your friend's.
Well, they're not gonna be back until after 10.
They went to a movie.
Call if you want, okay? Am I repulsive or something? No, no, not at all.
It's just I kind of feel I owe it to your father to keep a little distance here.
Brandon, it's not like I'm under surveillance, you know.
Okay, you can stay down here by yourself till you get bored.
But if 10:00 rolls around before that, you are going to your friend's house, okay? Okay.
Well, if it isn't my favorite little bookworm.
You reading those books I got you? Yeah, my favorite is The Unsolved Lincoln Murder Case.
It's the one that claims William Seward, the secretary of state, is behind it.
I see, well, it sounds like a good scandal.
I'm gonna have to read that sometime.
You should.
So why'd you wanna see me? It's about Kevin, right? Sometimes I forget how sharp you can be.
Yeah, it's about Kevin.
I met him, and although I don't know him very well, he seems okay, I like him.
I think you would too if you give him half a chance.
Doubt it.
Well, has he ever done anything mean to you? No, of course not.
Then, what's the problem? He reminds me of Lewis Payne.
Lewis Payne? You know, John Wilkes Booth's getaway driver.
He was good-looking, but he had the mind of a 10-year old.
Erica I just wish Mom didn't have to have a boyfriend.
Why is that? What if they got married? He lives in Orange County.
I might never get to see you again.
Hey, that's not gonna happen.
She's not gonna get married? Well, they just met.
But nothing is gonna split us up.
Wherever you go, we're always gonna be close, all right? I'm not gonna lose the only little sister I've got.
Yeah, I guess I just needed to hear that.
Then do me a favor, will you? Cut Kevin some slack? Well, I'm gonna get me a choice one.
And I don't care how much she costs.
I'm going to strip her naked, and smother her in minks, and choke her in diamonds.
Well, at least he's got the size to play Big Daddy.
I'll strip her naked, and choke her with Smother her Strip Thank you very much.
Couldn't I just have a second chance? It's my experience that second chances are never as good as the first.
Feel good.
You did just fine.
Next.
Name, please.
Brenda Walsh.
That's correct.
I'm reading for the part of Maggie.
And I'll be doing a monologue from Act 1.
Start when you're ready.
Brick, I'm not trying to whitewash my behavior.
I'm no good.
I don't know why people try and pretend to be good.
Nobody's good.
But I'm honest.
Give me credit for that, will you, please? Mournful, graceful.
She's got the fire, Eddie, and the desperation.
She's all right.
You know, sometimes, I think you agreed to this gig just so you could get close to all these 18-year-old actresses.
Skipper is dead.
I'm alive.
Maggie the Cat is alive.
I'm alive.
Hello.
Hi, Steve.
No, I don't wanna hear how well Laura's audition went.
Well, you've gotta give credit where credit is due.
I snuck in and I saw her.
Now, I don't mean to toot my own horn, but, buddy, I really got her performance up to speed.
Well, I'm glad you're such a talented guy, but I'm fighting to finish my work here.
It's been a little distracting.
What was that? Did you just giggle? No, I don't giggle.
I belch, but I definitely do not giggle.
Clare, will you get off the phone? The distraction I was mentioning.
Clare? Is she cute? Dangerously cute.
Can't get my mind off her.
She got the body of a centerfold and the personality of a volcano.
Well, give her what she wants, pal.
She's the chancellor's daughter, Steve, all I want is for her to get I gotta go.
This must be your traveling outfit, huh? Well, that's what I came to tell you.
You know that friend that Daddy thinks I'm staying over with? Actually, she's kind of staying over with a guy of her own.
So I don't really have anywhere to stay.
Brandon, you home? Stay put.
Hi, how was your audition? Oh, it was amazing.
I wouldn't have changed a thing.
What was Steve doing there with Laura Kingman? He's just helping her out.
It's no big deal.
Does he know we're going for the same part? So what? What's important is you said your tryout went well.
You're right.
It absolutely did.
- Although I kind of feel bad for Kelly.
- Kelly? Yeah, she was still waiting for her turn when I finally had to leave to go feed the Levins' cats.
Well, it probably just wasn't meant to happen.
You know, those cats must be pretty hungry.
Obviously, you're in a rush.
Working? Trying.
- Well, call if you get lonely.
- I will.
You said, "Stay put.
" Yeah.
That's it.
You gotta go.
I don't know where you're going, but you're going.
Where's the key? You won't find it in there.
It's hidden on me somewhere.
Try your luck.
I got a better idea.
You wanna spend the night here, fine.
Good night.
Brandon? Next.
Cover for me, Eddie.
Excuse me.
- Where are you going? - Home.
But you've waited so long.
You're not going to try out? No, I really have no business being here.
And actually, I was just doing this as a favor to a friend.
I see, well, maybe what you say is true, but I've waited all day to hear you read.
You're teasing me.
A little, but I'm not gonna let you go.
No one ever walks out of my auditions.
I hardly have any acting experience.
Well, maybe that's what I was responding to.
That certain freshness and fear.
Well, you've got the fear thing right.
The closer I was to auditioning, the more I was scared to death.
Look, I'm sure you have to get back inside, but it was nice to meet you.
Hold on.
I really want to see you on stage.
Humor me? I really think you're gonna be disappointed.
Well, let me be the judge of that.
- I'm Roy.
- Kelly Taylor.
Shall we? Donna, he did it again.
Where? On the paper? No, it's on the floor.
Give him to me.
Not if you're gonna rub his nose in it.
Donna, it's the only way he's gonna learn.
Maybe in your house, but in my house, we just put more paper down.
Okay, fine, why don't we go wall-to-wall paper? How about that? Why don't we put plastic on the furniture so he doesn't mistake it for a chew toy? He'll grow out of it.
He just needs to learn at his own speed.
You'll see.
Here, Rocky, you go on the paper.
You see, right here, yeah.
Rocky's toilet, how can I help you? Hi, David, is Kelly there? Yeah, she's right here, hold on.
- It's Brenda.
- Thanks.
- Hey.
- Hey.
You know, if you're tired of living in a kennel, you can always bunk in with me.
I might just do that.
Sorry I didn't get back to you last night.
I got your message, but by the time I got home from the audition, it was so late, I just crashed.
But you got to try out? Good, I'm glad.
Unfortunately, by the time I got on stage, I was so nervous.
But I'm glad I hung in there.
It was an interesting experience.
Well, word is that there's gonna be a list posted for callbacks around 11:00.
- It will be the big cut down.
- Do you think you have a chance? Don't even ask.
I don't wanna get my hopes up.
I'm gonna head over to the campus now.
Wanna meet me? I don't think so, I'm still on dream time.
But good luck, I'll be thinking of you.
Okay, I'll see you later.
- All right.
- Bye.
You tell Brenda you read for the lead? Now, please, he only did that because he felt sorry for me - because I'd been waiting so long - Kel.
Don't tell David, please.
Sure.
Are you expecting someone? Yeah, my cab.
School time.
So I guess I've been saved by the bell.
You didn't happen to molest me while I was sleeping, did you? No, I didn't.
I guess it was a dream.
Listen, Clare, normally, I'm not such a Boy Scout.
But I'm afraid with you, I'll just have to say goodbye and good luck.
Well, I had fun anyway.
I wanted to spend the night with a college guy, and I did.
Kind of.
Anything to take the suckiness out of a boring week.
I gotta go.
We'll do it again.
No, we won't.
I'm afraid this is it.
Oh, yeah? Or what, you'll tell my father? Goodbye.
Tell him.
He'll never believe you.
Why are you doing this, Clare? Because I like you.
Like I said, everything looks good.
The baby's really active.
That is amazing.
So there's nothing wrong with the ultrasound? Nothing wrong.
Normally, I wouldn't have done one of these, but you seemed so upset.
Well, thank you.
I'm glad you did.
- You can get dressed now.
- Thanks.
And the baby's growth is on target? The size of the head is right where it should be.
What about my weight? Well, we took your fundal growth, and though it's on the high side of the curve, it's not abnormal.
A lot of women gain excessive weight for their first pregnancy.
That's exactly what I told her, Dr.
Haller.
No, that is not what you said.
You said that my body chemistry is out of whack.
Just try and relax.
By next month, you'll be ready for Lamaze.
We're looking forward to that.
Well, what about my family history of diabetes? Couldn't there be complications? We've been on top of it right from the beginning.
You have nothing to worry about.
Great.
Cheer up.
I'll see you before you go.
Thanks, doc.
Thank you.
You think I'm just crying wolf, don't you? No, no, I don't.
It's just that we have to get a grip on things.
Ultrasounds are very expensive.
Insurance is only gonna cover so many.
Fine.
Thousands of women have babies every day.
Jesse, I'm not thousands of women.
Look, this is my body.
Call it mother's instinct, whatever you want.
I know something's wrong.
I can just feel it.
Thank you, Dylan.
Whatever you said to Erica, boy, did it work.
First time she didn't give me the evil eye.
Well, I guess she'd been doing so much reading on the conspiracy theory, that her mind was a little tangled.
So next time, I'll give her the complete set of The Baby-sitters Club.
Hey, look, I gotta get to work, okay? - Yeah, I better hit the beach.
- You a waterman? Dylan, didn't tell you he surfed? - You too? - No, yeah.
I mean, I'm getting older, but I still catch my share.
Thanks to a little high technology.
What technology? You got some kind of edge? Well, I just fitted this little sonar gizmo into an old board of mine, and it really works.
It measures the wave speed and the size of the swell.
It sort of takes the guesswork out of it for the mature ripper.
This I gotta see.
Well, come on.
My Jeep's just across the street.
Okay.
Dana Point was my home beach as a kid.
Man, it was really something, before the building boom killed the break.
It must have been epic.
No pollution, no lineups.
Not every day was paradise then.
There were always some kind of local hassles to get your attention.
- Yeah? - It was crazy stuff, man.
I remember this one time, man.
Kevin! Talk about a wipeout, man.
You all right? Thanks.
Hey, I don't know what I would've done if I lost you.
What would I have told Suzanne or Erica? I'll tell you this, man.
You just made a pal for life.
Oh, no.
I can't believe it.
Oh, my God, I can't believe it.
Congratulations.
I got called back? - Me too.
- Congratulations.
Thanks, it's down to five for the lead.
You, me and Kelly Taylor made the cut.
Kelly Taylor? That's impossible.
For Maggie the Cat, are you sure? Yeah, positive, why? Didn't you know she was going for it? She told me she was reading for Mae.
Well, this guy on the lighting crew said that she's a natural Maggie.
He heard that she's the front-runner.
Well, bye.
Of course, I'm sure it didn't hurt that she went out with Mr.
Randolph for cappuccino afterwards.
- What? - You didn't know that either? Yeah, well, with friends like that, who needs enemies? Good luck.