Teen Titans Go! (2013) s04e35 Episode Script
Career Day
1 "Career Day" [OPENING THEME PLAYING.]
[ALL GOBBLING.]
Attention, Titans.
Today is Career Day! ALL: All right! Whoo! I didn't know today was a holiday.
- # Career Day # - We gets the day off, baby! Day off? Holiday? What are you talking about? Career Day is the opposite of a holiday.
It is a day dedicated entirely to the consideration of work.
- Ooh, like the Labor Day? - We get the day off! [ALL CHEERING.]
Stop that! Career Day and Labor Day are different.
Career Day is the day you pick your career.
Which is the soul-crushing job that you'll do for the rest of your life.
- But we already have the careers.
- Yeah.
We're superheroes.
Mmm, not for much longer.
Remember we are the "Teen Titans.
" Once you're no longer teens, you will all be kicked out to live on the streets.
- That's cold.
- The world is an uncaring place.
Now, let's get Career Day started! [AIRHORNS BLOWING.]
What would you like your careers to be? I wanna be a dancer! [CROWD CHEERING.]
My career dream is to be a friend to all the kitties.
I don't care what I does as long as I does it with my best friend.
- Same here, bro.
- No, no, no! Dreams do not pay the bills.
What you need are sensible, boring, soul-crushing jobs.
You don't see me chasing my dream of being a professional basketball player.
[ALL LAUGHING.]
Well, now, that's just unrealistic.
- You do not meet the height requirement.
- I'm tall enough to ball.
Professional basketball is just really competitive.
Especially if you're short.
[GROWLS.]
My point is, following a dream is a one-way ticket to the garbage dump called disappointment.
Hey! [CRASHING.]
Since you're all delusional, I will pick your careers for you.
Raven, you're going to be a dentist.
You get to put your hands inside other people's mouths and fix their disgusting teeth.
- Both hands? - Up to you.
[WHIRRS.]
Starfire, you're going to be a civil engineer.
That means you'll be responsible for designing and managing construction projects.
That indeed sounds the soul-crushing.
[SOBS.]
Beast Boy, Cyborg, you're going to be CEO's of multi-million-dollar corporations.
- Can we do it together? - No! The world of business is ruthless! Your goal is to make profits, not friends! [SOBS.]
I don't want to do that for the rest of my life! Yes! You're finally getting into the spirit of Career Day.
Now, waste your life away doing a job you hate! [ELEVATOR BELL DINGS.]
[CLANKS.]
So, you've got a toothache, huh? Let's take a look.
Open wide.
Wider.
I need to get both my hands in there.
That's one.
[GAGGING.]
Wider.
[GAGGING.]
There we go.
Now, let's see.
Hmm.
[GAGGING.]
Uh, yup, you've got a cavity.
Gonna have to drill it.
[WHIRRING.]
[SIGHS.]
I know.
I'd rather be somewhere else too.
[WHIRRING.]
[SOFT DANCE MUSIC PLAYING.]
[WHIRRING.]
[DRILLING.]
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la [DRILL WHIRRING.]
[SOFT DANCE MUSIC CONTINUES.]
[RAVEN GRUNTS.]
[MUSIC STOPS.]
[GASPS.]
Oh, sorry.
But at least your toothache is gone.
[CASH REGISTER DINGS.]
Mmm.
[UPBEAT DANCE MUSIC PLAYS.]
[TAP DANCING.]
[SQUEAKING.]
[WHIRRING.]
I'm really glad I followed my passion for dancing.
Mama got that dentist money now! [CLANKS.]
As you can see, we've leveraged our assets and increased them good profits.
Business is booming.
We've got all these net gains happening now.
This is another nice chart.
As you can see, this arrow is pointing up.
We're going big league here, guys.
And that concludes the presentation.
[APPLAUDING.]
Thank you for your time.
[SIGHS.]
[SIGHS.]
[GROANS.]
[GROANS.]
[SIGHS.]
[SIGHS.]
My bro is someplace Thinking about me and my cute, cute face My bro, where you at? I know you're thinking about me Boo-yah to that - # My bro # - CYBORG: # Yeah, buddy # - # There you are # - CYBORG: # Here I am # Looking right at me, how bizarre BOTH: # My bro, I love you so # Your sweet eyebrows Your bad mustachio My bro My bro My bro [VOCALIZING.]
# My bro # [PHONES DIALING.]
[LINES RINGING.]
[SOBS.]
Bro, I can'ts take it no more! Being big businessmen ain't mean a thing if we can't be big businessmen together! I know, dude! But the world of business is ruthless, remember? We can't afford to [LINE DIES.]
[DIALING ON MOBILE.]
[LINE RINGING.]
We can't afford to be friends.
Forget that! I says we's merge our companies.
But your company makes fans and my company makes couches.
How are we supposed to merge that? [CASH REGISTER DINGS.]
Fan couches, yo.
[GASPS.]
BOTH: Sick.
[THUDS.]
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING.]
[WHIRRING.]
[ENGINES REVVING.]
We did it, dude! Just goes to show, you can follow your passion in life and still be successful! That's what's up! - CYBORG: Boo-ya! - BEAST BOY: He's living the dream, yo! [CLANKS.]
[MELANCHOLIC MUSIC PLAYING.]
[MOUSE CLACKING.]
[MEOWS AND PURRS.]
I am sorry, Mrs.
Kitty, but I can no longer play.
For I must engineer the civils.
Let us see.
The skyscraper should be the tall.
Also, it should have the windows for the seeing of out.
[MOUSE CLACKING.]
And it shall certainly have the waterslide for when the occupants wish to slide on the water.
Now, I will add the wings so it can fly! Oh, and do not think I forgot to give the building a face.
[WHISTLES.]
[ALL MURMURING.]
[SIGHS.]
[MEOWS.]
Oh, Mrs.
Kitty.
I have designed the most wonderful of skyscrapers, but no one will build it.
[GIGGLES.]
You look like the fuzzy construction worker.
[GASPS.]
An idea has suddenly formed in my pre-frontal cortex.
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING.]
[WHIRRING.]
[SPITS.]
It is incredible that no one thought to employ the kitten cats as the construction workers before.
[MEOWS.]
They always do the landing on their feet.
And the nine lives are also useful on the construction site.
[CLANKING AND DRILLING.]
[LAUGHTER.]
I have succeeded at my career and I have fulfilled my dream of becoming a friend to all the kitties.
I believe this calls for the whoop-whoop-whoop.
Whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop! STARFIRE: Meow, meow, meow, meow! Meow, whoop, meow, whoop-whoop! [LAUGHS.]
Joy! - So, how was Career Day, Titans? - It was awesome! Beast Boy and I merged our businesses and now we're more successful than ever! We is best friends and business partners, y'all! I was able to combine dentistry and dancing.
[MUSIC PLAYING.]
And I employed the kitten cats to build the building.
So, you're saying you can follow your passion and have a successful career? - That's right, yo! - I I didn't think it was possible.
Titans, you have inspired me to follow my dream! I am going to be a professional basketball player! - No, Robin.
- You're way too short.
- That's just unrealistic.
- Get yourself a real job, fool.
[ALL GOBBLING.]
Attention, Titans.
Today is Career Day! ALL: All right! Whoo! I didn't know today was a holiday.
- # Career Day # - We gets the day off, baby! Day off? Holiday? What are you talking about? Career Day is the opposite of a holiday.
It is a day dedicated entirely to the consideration of work.
- Ooh, like the Labor Day? - We get the day off! [ALL CHEERING.]
Stop that! Career Day and Labor Day are different.
Career Day is the day you pick your career.
Which is the soul-crushing job that you'll do for the rest of your life.
- But we already have the careers.
- Yeah.
We're superheroes.
Mmm, not for much longer.
Remember we are the "Teen Titans.
" Once you're no longer teens, you will all be kicked out to live on the streets.
- That's cold.
- The world is an uncaring place.
Now, let's get Career Day started! [AIRHORNS BLOWING.]
What would you like your careers to be? I wanna be a dancer! [CROWD CHEERING.]
My career dream is to be a friend to all the kitties.
I don't care what I does as long as I does it with my best friend.
- Same here, bro.
- No, no, no! Dreams do not pay the bills.
What you need are sensible, boring, soul-crushing jobs.
You don't see me chasing my dream of being a professional basketball player.
[ALL LAUGHING.]
Well, now, that's just unrealistic.
- You do not meet the height requirement.
- I'm tall enough to ball.
Professional basketball is just really competitive.
Especially if you're short.
[GROWLS.]
My point is, following a dream is a one-way ticket to the garbage dump called disappointment.
Hey! [CRASHING.]
Since you're all delusional, I will pick your careers for you.
Raven, you're going to be a dentist.
You get to put your hands inside other people's mouths and fix their disgusting teeth.
- Both hands? - Up to you.
[WHIRRS.]
Starfire, you're going to be a civil engineer.
That means you'll be responsible for designing and managing construction projects.
That indeed sounds the soul-crushing.
[SOBS.]
Beast Boy, Cyborg, you're going to be CEO's of multi-million-dollar corporations.
- Can we do it together? - No! The world of business is ruthless! Your goal is to make profits, not friends! [SOBS.]
I don't want to do that for the rest of my life! Yes! You're finally getting into the spirit of Career Day.
Now, waste your life away doing a job you hate! [ELEVATOR BELL DINGS.]
[CLANKS.]
So, you've got a toothache, huh? Let's take a look.
Open wide.
Wider.
I need to get both my hands in there.
That's one.
[GAGGING.]
Wider.
[GAGGING.]
There we go.
Now, let's see.
Hmm.
[GAGGING.]
Uh, yup, you've got a cavity.
Gonna have to drill it.
[WHIRRING.]
[SIGHS.]
I know.
I'd rather be somewhere else too.
[WHIRRING.]
[SOFT DANCE MUSIC PLAYING.]
[WHIRRING.]
[DRILLING.]
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la [DRILL WHIRRING.]
[SOFT DANCE MUSIC CONTINUES.]
[RAVEN GRUNTS.]
[MUSIC STOPS.]
[GASPS.]
Oh, sorry.
But at least your toothache is gone.
[CASH REGISTER DINGS.]
Mmm.
[UPBEAT DANCE MUSIC PLAYS.]
[TAP DANCING.]
[SQUEAKING.]
[WHIRRING.]
I'm really glad I followed my passion for dancing.
Mama got that dentist money now! [CLANKS.]
As you can see, we've leveraged our assets and increased them good profits.
Business is booming.
We've got all these net gains happening now.
This is another nice chart.
As you can see, this arrow is pointing up.
We're going big league here, guys.
And that concludes the presentation.
[APPLAUDING.]
Thank you for your time.
[SIGHS.]
[SIGHS.]
[GROANS.]
[GROANS.]
[SIGHS.]
[SIGHS.]
My bro is someplace Thinking about me and my cute, cute face My bro, where you at? I know you're thinking about me Boo-yah to that - # My bro # - CYBORG: # Yeah, buddy # - # There you are # - CYBORG: # Here I am # Looking right at me, how bizarre BOTH: # My bro, I love you so # Your sweet eyebrows Your bad mustachio My bro My bro My bro [VOCALIZING.]
# My bro # [PHONES DIALING.]
[LINES RINGING.]
[SOBS.]
Bro, I can'ts take it no more! Being big businessmen ain't mean a thing if we can't be big businessmen together! I know, dude! But the world of business is ruthless, remember? We can't afford to [LINE DIES.]
[DIALING ON MOBILE.]
[LINE RINGING.]
We can't afford to be friends.
Forget that! I says we's merge our companies.
But your company makes fans and my company makes couches.
How are we supposed to merge that? [CASH REGISTER DINGS.]
Fan couches, yo.
[GASPS.]
BOTH: Sick.
[THUDS.]
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING.]
[WHIRRING.]
[ENGINES REVVING.]
We did it, dude! Just goes to show, you can follow your passion in life and still be successful! That's what's up! - CYBORG: Boo-ya! - BEAST BOY: He's living the dream, yo! [CLANKS.]
[MELANCHOLIC MUSIC PLAYING.]
[MOUSE CLACKING.]
[MEOWS AND PURRS.]
I am sorry, Mrs.
Kitty, but I can no longer play.
For I must engineer the civils.
Let us see.
The skyscraper should be the tall.
Also, it should have the windows for the seeing of out.
[MOUSE CLACKING.]
And it shall certainly have the waterslide for when the occupants wish to slide on the water.
Now, I will add the wings so it can fly! Oh, and do not think I forgot to give the building a face.
[WHISTLES.]
[ALL MURMURING.]
[SIGHS.]
[MEOWS.]
Oh, Mrs.
Kitty.
I have designed the most wonderful of skyscrapers, but no one will build it.
[GIGGLES.]
You look like the fuzzy construction worker.
[GASPS.]
An idea has suddenly formed in my pre-frontal cortex.
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING.]
[WHIRRING.]
[SPITS.]
It is incredible that no one thought to employ the kitten cats as the construction workers before.
[MEOWS.]
They always do the landing on their feet.
And the nine lives are also useful on the construction site.
[CLANKING AND DRILLING.]
[LAUGHTER.]
I have succeeded at my career and I have fulfilled my dream of becoming a friend to all the kitties.
I believe this calls for the whoop-whoop-whoop.
Whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop! STARFIRE: Meow, meow, meow, meow! Meow, whoop, meow, whoop-whoop! [LAUGHS.]
Joy! - So, how was Career Day, Titans? - It was awesome! Beast Boy and I merged our businesses and now we're more successful than ever! We is best friends and business partners, y'all! I was able to combine dentistry and dancing.
[MUSIC PLAYING.]
And I employed the kitten cats to build the building.
So, you're saying you can follow your passion and have a successful career? - That's right, yo! - I I didn't think it was possible.
Titans, you have inspired me to follow my dream! I am going to be a professional basketball player! - No, Robin.
- You're way too short.
- That's just unrealistic.
- Get yourself a real job, fool.