Gintama (2005) s04e43 Episode Script
Cooking Is About Guts
Time to eat! I live for this stuff! One more, one more.
Say, Kagura-chan We've been having egg over rice for how many days now? No idea.
I don't dwell on the past.
No lingering on relationships that are over.
That's my motto.
Forget the past.
Look at the garbage disposal.
It's filled with the remains of the men you've dumped.
We've been having egg over rice forever It's been egg over rice ever since it's been your turn to cook.
Three straight days of egg over rice Hell, I'm starting to feel like an egg poured over rice.
This morning, I was like "The eggs, the eggs are coming, rice!" It tastes good, so who cares? I can never get enough of this.
That's you.
That's because you reset your brain every single day.
Because you lose your saved game every day.
Because you start over from Aliahan every day [Note: First town in the game Dragon Quest 3 (DQ3).
.]
But y'know, men have a hard time getting over these things.
When they're getting a puff-puff in Ashalam, they remember their mothers.
[Note: Another town in the game DQ3.
.]
Sorry, Mom.
["Puff-puff".]
I haven't done anything to save the world.
This whole Aliahan narration spiel starts flashing by.
Enough of this.
Let's go defeat Baramos.
[Note: Boss character in DQ3.
.]
It's time for the hero to leave the nest.
Time to hatch from its egg.
He should be glad I'm even making food for him, stupid idiot.
Keeps nagging and nagging like a mother-in-law.
Kagura-chan, egg over rice certainly tastes good, but having it every day is too much.
It's better when you only have it once in a while.
You need to have a balanced diet.
That's right.
You could also try scrambled eggs or rolled omelets.
Those are still egg recipes, Sis! I don't need anything besides my egg over rice.
I can survive if I've got my egg over rice with me.
It might be fine with you, Kagura-chan, but once you're married, your husband will have a hard time.
I'm never getting married.
I'm leeching off Odd Jobs forever.
Oh, so you're going to marry Gin-san? Who would marry that good-for-nothing Then I'll marry the Colonel.
That old man has every chicken under his control.
All the eggs and fried chicken I can eat.
I'm pretty sure that the Colonel would be against egg over rice every day.
You'll have a rough time if you marry the Colonel.
If you don't keep him on a tight leash, he'll gorge himself on fried foods.
The Colonel doesn't live on fried chicken.
That's his job! You need to learn to make stuff like pork cutlets and croquettes for a balanced diet.
Aren't those all fried?! Are you trying to kill the Colonel?! Kagura-chan, what do you think? This is a good opportunity.
Would you be willing to join me in taking cooking classes? ["Cooking is About Guts".]
[Kitaoji Cooking Class.]
Actually, I was considering expanding my cooking repertoire.
You don't get a chance to learn if your mother dies when you're still young.
Can I marry the Colonel if I learn how to cook here? Yes, the Colonel will be mad about you.
He'll give you a fried ring at a fried lounge bar while being fried.
What do you take the Colonel for? And Shinpachi, why are you here? If I don't expand my repertoire, nothing will change.
There will only be more completely burned objects.
Did you say something, Shin-chan? No, not a word.
Otae-chan.
Oh, Kyubei-san.
I came because you told me to, but what is this? Am I supposed to learn how to cook? Men do not step in the kitchen.
This is one request I cannot follow You'll also end up being someone's bride, so you should learn how to cook.
I will never become a bride.
If you insist, I would rather take Otae-chan or Ronald as my bride.
Now it's Ronald?! You girls must really love junk food! Since Ronald's gender is unclear, and I can have all the french fries I want every day.
You people will eat anything if it's been deep-fried! Why don't you just eat grease?! But if you're going to become Ronald's bride or take Ronald as a bride, you have to learn how to cook.
If you don't keep him on a tight leash, he'll stick anything and everything between two buns.
He'll end up sticking mother-in-law and sister-in-law between two buns and terrible things will happen.
What the hell is that?! A double In-law Burger?! What are you whispering about? Otae-san, you intend to learn cooking so you can win Gin-san's heart?! Sa-chan-san! I won't allow you to beat me to the punch! I will be the one who stirs Gin-san's natto! You're still after Gin-san? You should really snap out of it.
You could never be happy with that lazy bum.
Don't act like you know what you're talking about.
I'm only after the position of Gin-san's bride! [Note: Mito Komon is the star of a long-running Japanese historical drama TV show.
.]
If you insist, I would rather be Mito Komon's wife! Just to be clear, Mito Natto is famous, but it has nothing to do with Mito Komon.
You won't have all the natto you can eat.
I can watch all the Komon's anus I want! [Note: A different character for "komon" means anus.
.]
What is this, grade school?! You don't need to learn cooking to become the great Mito Komon's wife.
As a kunoichi, you just have to take baths and use a little sex appeal and he'll be yours.
[Note: The show had kunoichi bath scenes to attract male viewers.
.]
Hey! Don't make it sound like Mito Komon made a move on Kaoru Yumi! Okay, okay! Keep it down! Did you all come here to chat? Or did you come to learn how to cook?! No, neither is the correct answer! You have come to learn how to express your affection! Understand? Cooking is not merely a daily chore! You give flowers to the ones you love! You hug the ones you love! Cooking is but another expression of affection! She's lecturing us right off the bat.
Is that our teacher? That's Ms.
Rosanko Kitaoji, a cooking expert.
She's a talented cook, but also known for being very strict.
Oh, I think I've seen her on TV before.
[Note: Spoof of the show Iron Chef.
.]
Ah, I think she was on the Samurai Chef.
Everyone together now! Cooking is about love! Cooking is about love! Cooking is about love! No, that wasn't it.
Cooking is about love! It was a press conference to announce her divorce.
Cooking is about It was a nasty mess with the husband cheating for over ten years.
Oh? So she's going on about love when she has no one to love.
He ran away.
Sa-chan-san! She can hear you! You're being rude.
We can't be sure that she doesn't have a man.
Or she may still have feelings for that pathetic man.
You aren't helping, Kyubei-san! Well Since this is our first class, I'll have you show me how skilled you are.
Cooking may be about love, but I don't want to waste my time on little girls who have never held a knife before.
I shall be testing you now.
Cook any food to your liking and the team with the worst result will immediately be kicked out! She is so staring right at us! Well, everyone! Pour all of your knowledge and love into your cooking! I will witness everything you do right and everything you do wrong.
I won't miss a thing! Now begin! How's this? Hmm Sh-She hasn't budged an inch.
We've been marked.
She's got her eyes on us! The teacher fully intends to get rid of us! Good grief, I came here to learn how to cook, so I didn't expect this to happen first.
There's no other way.
We'll have to work together.
I'm not very confident in our technique, but they can't beat us when it comes to love.
Fine by me! I'll show them my love for the Colonel! No, for Ronald.
For Mito's anus.
I'm sorry, but You're all over the place, and your love is for ridiculous reasons That's true.
We can't win if we're divided.
Beggars can't be choosers.
We'll compromise and go with Inaba from the rock duo B'z.
Why?! How do you wind up getting Inaba-san out of Mito's anus?! You clearly chose him for your own reasons! Like an office lady's taste in men from a decade ago! Don't give me that crap! I said I wanted Mito's anus! Fine.
I'll do whatever Otae-chan wants.
We'll go with Inaba-san's asshole.
Why asshole?! You're mixing in the anus talk! Hey! What happened to the Colonel?! Let's merge Inaba and the Colonel! Hey! That doesn't matter at this point! Let's start cooking! It certainly matters! Cooking is about love! The key isn't what you make.
The key is who you're making it for.
Didn't you hear me? That may be the key, Teach, but Inaba-san and Komon-san aren't here! They won't be eating our cooking! If we're talking B'z, I prefer Matsumoto over Inaba! So manly! And it helps that he looks like Ken Shimura, the comedian! What are we even trying to choose here?! Why not go with Ken Shimura to begin with?! Then if I win rock, paper, scissors, it's Inaba-san.
If Kagura-chan wins, Ken Shimura will do.
No, something's wrong with that.
It's wrong to separate those two.
B'z only works when the two of them are combined! Combining the two of them won't give you B'z! Understood.
Then I'll do this.
If Otae-chan wins, it's B'z.
If I win, it's WANDS.
[Note: Japanese band from the 90's that was from the same record company as B'z.
.]
Where did WANDS come from?! [Note: Dragon Ball GT ending song by WANDS.
.]
Do you people want me to take a rusty machine gun and shoot you down?! This will never end at this rate.
We should forget about B'z for now.
Something similar to B'z Oh, then we can go with the Drifterz.
[Note: The Drifters, music/comic group from the 70's.
.]
How are they similar?! You just stuck a 'z' in there so it would look similar! Then we'll go with KEN from Drifterz.
CHA would also make a fine choice.
[Note: Kato Cha, a member from the Drifters.
.]
There are no such flashy members in the Drifters! It's just Ken Shimura! Hey! So after all that talking, we end up with Ken Shimura?! What are you doing?! Everyone else has started cooking! There are ingredients over there so make whatever you want.
Yes, make something that would make KEN very happy.
I said KEN isn't here! KEN won't be eating! Shut up! Zip it, little twerp! Can we just salt up this watermelon? He likes quick snacks.
That wouldn't be considered cooking! I'm sorry to bring this up now, everyone But Can we drop KEN for CHA? You're still on that subject?! Didn't we agree to drop that ridiculous topic?! We know that KEN loves his liquor, but nobody knows what his favorite foods are.
But CHA, on the other hand, would be simple.
CHA-han, as in fried rice.
That's just a pun! I see, it's perfect for CHA! You're brilliant, Kyu-chan! No, she's just trying to be clever! It has nothing to do with CHA! But I'd feel bad if we ditched KEN now.
Enough of that! Then we can just go with KATO-chan KEN-cha-han.
Hello?! Yep! You need both of them for KATOKEN to work! Nobody cares! Nobody at all! Cut it out already! What did we come here for anyway?! For now, we have green onions, pork, eggs, the basics.
The question is how do we spice it up? We can add shrimp or scallops for a seafood flair If we add kimchi, we'll have kimchi fried rice.
What do we do? What do KATO-chan and KEN-chan like? No clue.
Don't give me that! You're the ones who decided that they like cha-han rice! We haven't made any progress at all! Let's go with seafood.
Toss in wakame and kombu! Hey! Hold it! KEN has a receding hairline.
He needs plenty of seaweed for minerals! Yeah, but that looks horrible! It looks like a wig! You're so annoying.
I'm wishing for KEN's head to end up like this! Then we should also throw in nori? Not needed! We have enough black! Then we'll top it off with something Rxxe21-like.
Rxxe21-like?! That's clearly Rxxe21 in your hand! It's not edible! It isn't seafood! All creatures were born from the mother sea.
Rxxe21 wouldn't count! Is this fried rice solely for the purpose of growing hair?! It'd be faster to stick kombu on KEN's head! That's right! I've been standing here quietly while you all go on about KEN! Just to be clear! This fried rice is KATO-chan KEN-cha-han rice! KATO-chan is also here! KATO-chan and KEN-chan have to be together for B'z to work! They aren't B'z! What the hell do you think B'z is?! Then Sarutobi-san Let me ask you.
What can we do for KATO-chan? What are you talking about? He has plenty of hair.
Lots of money.
Popular with the girls.
Isn't he already happy? So? You could say the same about KEN, besides that he's balding.
KEN, despite his balding Has this really cool blog What's wrong with that?! You can't have a cool blog if you're balding?! What's the problem?! Despite the fact that he's a weird old man on the outside, he's totally cool on the inside.
He isn't anything like a weird old man.
He isn't harumph at all He's so harumph! What's wrong with that?! That's the point! That makes him cool! So he wasn't "fine and dandy" at all I'm sorry.
I had no idea.
I have no idea why you're apologizing! But Is it okay if I say something? KATO-chan, at his age Gets completely naked when he takes a crap Isn't that taboo? I'm sorry I had no idea How could you possibly know that anyway?! KATO-chan and KEN-chan are hurting and tired How?! If only we could make some cha-han rice to cheer them up But we're so useless A little girl who's rarely used a knife in the kitchen could never cook anything full of love to cheer someone up We had no chance from the beginning What's with the gloomy mood? How did we go from KATO-chan pooping naked to this? Why is Kyubei-san joining in? It isn't impossible! Mentaiko? Teacher, we're done! Please try it.
[KATO SHIMURA "Go get 'em".]
Disgusting.
But If I were KATO-chan KEN-chan, I couldn't accept this.
Now get going.
I have nothing to teach you.
Cooking is about love.
Never forget those words.
Okay! We did it! We've been titled masters.
A master, huh? Now Gin-chan can't complain! Teacher, who is this? That's what I want to know.
Who is KATO-chan KEN-chan? No idea In any case, it's a good thing you got rid of those nuisances.
Let's repeat it, so we don't forget.
Good idea.
Cooking is about Love! Hopeless.
Boy, the year's already over, huh? Sure was fast.
I hate how the year goes by faster as we get older.
At this rate, by the time I'm an old geezer the years will pass at the speed of a Formula 1 car.
I've still got a long ways to go.
Well, I'm already up to Ben Johnson speed, I'd say.
My Ben Johnson is already up to here.
Don't get too cocky because you're all still young.
Your Ben Johnson will fall behind soon enough.
For real? Ben Johnson's gonna fall out?? I prefer Carl Lewis over Ben Johnson.
He's cooler.
Well, all I'm saying is, we all had a pretty good year, right? Hell no! It's still January! And haven't we had the exact same conversation three years in a row?! That's 'cause this whole segment was recycled.
Yeah.
Not just the lines either.
The video's the same, too.
Your lines are exactly the same as the ones from last year! Well, you know They've been working hard on this anime.
But you know It's the end of the year and they're also working on the movie.
The staff's gotten used to slacking at a TV schedule the last four years.
It doesn't take long for them to run out of steam.
They're the type you expect to start clutching their stomachs before they've even left the starting area of a marathon.
Nobody wants to hear about whining behind the scenes.
Besides, this is why you usually have another team ready to go, right? That's how all the other anime do it.
Well, come April, the movie will be complete and the TV series will end.
We can all rest easy.
Not only can we rest easy, but we'll all be unemployed.
Yeah, we won't be able to laugh at Hasegawa-san anymore.
Uh, wait Did you just say that the TV series will end? The show's ending in April? What are you saying, Pachi-boy? Didn't we say that we were entering the final arc back in episode 125? I only tell the truth.
Grown adults would never lie about ending a show Hold on! Who would remember something you said a year ago?! Entering the final stage of the final arc.
And so, I'm sure that some of you were wondering about the number by the title this week.
I shall explain now! A countdown really began back when we said it would.
Huh? Really? Well, at one point, we realized that we miscounted, so we counted 19 twice to hide that fact.
You just told everybody! Why is this final little gimmick still half-assed?! But this time, we're telling the truth about this show ending.
The boy who cried wolf was telling the truth in the end.
Though that was when he died.
And we only have a few numbers left in this new year.
But I don't really like having a movie right after the TV show ends.
Like how those recent TV dramas do it? Air a wishy-washy final episode and go, "To be continued in the movie.
" The TV show ends up feeling like a promotion for the movie.
That's insulting the viewers who've been watching every week! I would never go see one of those movies! You'd better not be fooled by these sneaky ticket sets! Wait! Why is that the only footage that's new?! And it has nothing to do with the movie! Besides, movie previews these days are just a bunch of tempting scenes.
We're going to be playing a commercial right after this, so you'd better not be fooled.
Yeah, something like this! If you have time to plan out a pretty death, ["Witness the end of GinTama the anime".]
why not live a pretty life to the very end? ["on the big screen!!".]
GinTama the Movie.
Benizakura Arc: the New Interpretation ["Saturday, April 24th.
It ends for real.
".]
That's way too tempting!! [Preview.]
Why did he have to come now? We're about to battle it out with the Anti-Foreigner Faction Why? Why now, Tarzan?! ["Whenever I hear the word "Leviathan", silly old me, I immediately think about Sazae-san!!".]
[The staff went ahead and ate the tasty cha-han rice from the gag in this episode.
.]
[The scent of the wakame in the cha-han was intense.
.]
[See you next time.
.]
Say, Kagura-chan We've been having egg over rice for how many days now? No idea.
I don't dwell on the past.
No lingering on relationships that are over.
That's my motto.
Forget the past.
Look at the garbage disposal.
It's filled with the remains of the men you've dumped.
We've been having egg over rice forever It's been egg over rice ever since it's been your turn to cook.
Three straight days of egg over rice Hell, I'm starting to feel like an egg poured over rice.
This morning, I was like "The eggs, the eggs are coming, rice!" It tastes good, so who cares? I can never get enough of this.
That's you.
That's because you reset your brain every single day.
Because you lose your saved game every day.
Because you start over from Aliahan every day [Note: First town in the game Dragon Quest 3 (DQ3).
.]
But y'know, men have a hard time getting over these things.
When they're getting a puff-puff in Ashalam, they remember their mothers.
[Note: Another town in the game DQ3.
.]
Sorry, Mom.
["Puff-puff".]
I haven't done anything to save the world.
This whole Aliahan narration spiel starts flashing by.
Enough of this.
Let's go defeat Baramos.
[Note: Boss character in DQ3.
.]
It's time for the hero to leave the nest.
Time to hatch from its egg.
He should be glad I'm even making food for him, stupid idiot.
Keeps nagging and nagging like a mother-in-law.
Kagura-chan, egg over rice certainly tastes good, but having it every day is too much.
It's better when you only have it once in a while.
You need to have a balanced diet.
That's right.
You could also try scrambled eggs or rolled omelets.
Those are still egg recipes, Sis! I don't need anything besides my egg over rice.
I can survive if I've got my egg over rice with me.
It might be fine with you, Kagura-chan, but once you're married, your husband will have a hard time.
I'm never getting married.
I'm leeching off Odd Jobs forever.
Oh, so you're going to marry Gin-san? Who would marry that good-for-nothing Then I'll marry the Colonel.
That old man has every chicken under his control.
All the eggs and fried chicken I can eat.
I'm pretty sure that the Colonel would be against egg over rice every day.
You'll have a rough time if you marry the Colonel.
If you don't keep him on a tight leash, he'll gorge himself on fried foods.
The Colonel doesn't live on fried chicken.
That's his job! You need to learn to make stuff like pork cutlets and croquettes for a balanced diet.
Aren't those all fried?! Are you trying to kill the Colonel?! Kagura-chan, what do you think? This is a good opportunity.
Would you be willing to join me in taking cooking classes? ["Cooking is About Guts".]
[Kitaoji Cooking Class.]
Actually, I was considering expanding my cooking repertoire.
You don't get a chance to learn if your mother dies when you're still young.
Can I marry the Colonel if I learn how to cook here? Yes, the Colonel will be mad about you.
He'll give you a fried ring at a fried lounge bar while being fried.
What do you take the Colonel for? And Shinpachi, why are you here? If I don't expand my repertoire, nothing will change.
There will only be more completely burned objects.
Did you say something, Shin-chan? No, not a word.
Otae-chan.
Oh, Kyubei-san.
I came because you told me to, but what is this? Am I supposed to learn how to cook? Men do not step in the kitchen.
This is one request I cannot follow You'll also end up being someone's bride, so you should learn how to cook.
I will never become a bride.
If you insist, I would rather take Otae-chan or Ronald as my bride.
Now it's Ronald?! You girls must really love junk food! Since Ronald's gender is unclear, and I can have all the french fries I want every day.
You people will eat anything if it's been deep-fried! Why don't you just eat grease?! But if you're going to become Ronald's bride or take Ronald as a bride, you have to learn how to cook.
If you don't keep him on a tight leash, he'll stick anything and everything between two buns.
He'll end up sticking mother-in-law and sister-in-law between two buns and terrible things will happen.
What the hell is that?! A double In-law Burger?! What are you whispering about? Otae-san, you intend to learn cooking so you can win Gin-san's heart?! Sa-chan-san! I won't allow you to beat me to the punch! I will be the one who stirs Gin-san's natto! You're still after Gin-san? You should really snap out of it.
You could never be happy with that lazy bum.
Don't act like you know what you're talking about.
I'm only after the position of Gin-san's bride! [Note: Mito Komon is the star of a long-running Japanese historical drama TV show.
.]
If you insist, I would rather be Mito Komon's wife! Just to be clear, Mito Natto is famous, but it has nothing to do with Mito Komon.
You won't have all the natto you can eat.
I can watch all the Komon's anus I want! [Note: A different character for "komon" means anus.
.]
What is this, grade school?! You don't need to learn cooking to become the great Mito Komon's wife.
As a kunoichi, you just have to take baths and use a little sex appeal and he'll be yours.
[Note: The show had kunoichi bath scenes to attract male viewers.
.]
Hey! Don't make it sound like Mito Komon made a move on Kaoru Yumi! Okay, okay! Keep it down! Did you all come here to chat? Or did you come to learn how to cook?! No, neither is the correct answer! You have come to learn how to express your affection! Understand? Cooking is not merely a daily chore! You give flowers to the ones you love! You hug the ones you love! Cooking is but another expression of affection! She's lecturing us right off the bat.
Is that our teacher? That's Ms.
Rosanko Kitaoji, a cooking expert.
She's a talented cook, but also known for being very strict.
Oh, I think I've seen her on TV before.
[Note: Spoof of the show Iron Chef.
.]
Ah, I think she was on the Samurai Chef.
Everyone together now! Cooking is about love! Cooking is about love! Cooking is about love! No, that wasn't it.
Cooking is about love! It was a press conference to announce her divorce.
Cooking is about It was a nasty mess with the husband cheating for over ten years.
Oh? So she's going on about love when she has no one to love.
He ran away.
Sa-chan-san! She can hear you! You're being rude.
We can't be sure that she doesn't have a man.
Or she may still have feelings for that pathetic man.
You aren't helping, Kyubei-san! Well Since this is our first class, I'll have you show me how skilled you are.
Cooking may be about love, but I don't want to waste my time on little girls who have never held a knife before.
I shall be testing you now.
Cook any food to your liking and the team with the worst result will immediately be kicked out! She is so staring right at us! Well, everyone! Pour all of your knowledge and love into your cooking! I will witness everything you do right and everything you do wrong.
I won't miss a thing! Now begin! How's this? Hmm Sh-She hasn't budged an inch.
We've been marked.
She's got her eyes on us! The teacher fully intends to get rid of us! Good grief, I came here to learn how to cook, so I didn't expect this to happen first.
There's no other way.
We'll have to work together.
I'm not very confident in our technique, but they can't beat us when it comes to love.
Fine by me! I'll show them my love for the Colonel! No, for Ronald.
For Mito's anus.
I'm sorry, but You're all over the place, and your love is for ridiculous reasons That's true.
We can't win if we're divided.
Beggars can't be choosers.
We'll compromise and go with Inaba from the rock duo B'z.
Why?! How do you wind up getting Inaba-san out of Mito's anus?! You clearly chose him for your own reasons! Like an office lady's taste in men from a decade ago! Don't give me that crap! I said I wanted Mito's anus! Fine.
I'll do whatever Otae-chan wants.
We'll go with Inaba-san's asshole.
Why asshole?! You're mixing in the anus talk! Hey! What happened to the Colonel?! Let's merge Inaba and the Colonel! Hey! That doesn't matter at this point! Let's start cooking! It certainly matters! Cooking is about love! The key isn't what you make.
The key is who you're making it for.
Didn't you hear me? That may be the key, Teach, but Inaba-san and Komon-san aren't here! They won't be eating our cooking! If we're talking B'z, I prefer Matsumoto over Inaba! So manly! And it helps that he looks like Ken Shimura, the comedian! What are we even trying to choose here?! Why not go with Ken Shimura to begin with?! Then if I win rock, paper, scissors, it's Inaba-san.
If Kagura-chan wins, Ken Shimura will do.
No, something's wrong with that.
It's wrong to separate those two.
B'z only works when the two of them are combined! Combining the two of them won't give you B'z! Understood.
Then I'll do this.
If Otae-chan wins, it's B'z.
If I win, it's WANDS.
[Note: Japanese band from the 90's that was from the same record company as B'z.
.]
Where did WANDS come from?! [Note: Dragon Ball GT ending song by WANDS.
.]
Do you people want me to take a rusty machine gun and shoot you down?! This will never end at this rate.
We should forget about B'z for now.
Something similar to B'z Oh, then we can go with the Drifterz.
[Note: The Drifters, music/comic group from the 70's.
.]
How are they similar?! You just stuck a 'z' in there so it would look similar! Then we'll go with KEN from Drifterz.
CHA would also make a fine choice.
[Note: Kato Cha, a member from the Drifters.
.]
There are no such flashy members in the Drifters! It's just Ken Shimura! Hey! So after all that talking, we end up with Ken Shimura?! What are you doing?! Everyone else has started cooking! There are ingredients over there so make whatever you want.
Yes, make something that would make KEN very happy.
I said KEN isn't here! KEN won't be eating! Shut up! Zip it, little twerp! Can we just salt up this watermelon? He likes quick snacks.
That wouldn't be considered cooking! I'm sorry to bring this up now, everyone But Can we drop KEN for CHA? You're still on that subject?! Didn't we agree to drop that ridiculous topic?! We know that KEN loves his liquor, but nobody knows what his favorite foods are.
But CHA, on the other hand, would be simple.
CHA-han, as in fried rice.
That's just a pun! I see, it's perfect for CHA! You're brilliant, Kyu-chan! No, she's just trying to be clever! It has nothing to do with CHA! But I'd feel bad if we ditched KEN now.
Enough of that! Then we can just go with KATO-chan KEN-cha-han.
Hello?! Yep! You need both of them for KATOKEN to work! Nobody cares! Nobody at all! Cut it out already! What did we come here for anyway?! For now, we have green onions, pork, eggs, the basics.
The question is how do we spice it up? We can add shrimp or scallops for a seafood flair If we add kimchi, we'll have kimchi fried rice.
What do we do? What do KATO-chan and KEN-chan like? No clue.
Don't give me that! You're the ones who decided that they like cha-han rice! We haven't made any progress at all! Let's go with seafood.
Toss in wakame and kombu! Hey! Hold it! KEN has a receding hairline.
He needs plenty of seaweed for minerals! Yeah, but that looks horrible! It looks like a wig! You're so annoying.
I'm wishing for KEN's head to end up like this! Then we should also throw in nori? Not needed! We have enough black! Then we'll top it off with something Rxxe21-like.
Rxxe21-like?! That's clearly Rxxe21 in your hand! It's not edible! It isn't seafood! All creatures were born from the mother sea.
Rxxe21 wouldn't count! Is this fried rice solely for the purpose of growing hair?! It'd be faster to stick kombu on KEN's head! That's right! I've been standing here quietly while you all go on about KEN! Just to be clear! This fried rice is KATO-chan KEN-cha-han rice! KATO-chan is also here! KATO-chan and KEN-chan have to be together for B'z to work! They aren't B'z! What the hell do you think B'z is?! Then Sarutobi-san Let me ask you.
What can we do for KATO-chan? What are you talking about? He has plenty of hair.
Lots of money.
Popular with the girls.
Isn't he already happy? So? You could say the same about KEN, besides that he's balding.
KEN, despite his balding Has this really cool blog What's wrong with that?! You can't have a cool blog if you're balding?! What's the problem?! Despite the fact that he's a weird old man on the outside, he's totally cool on the inside.
He isn't anything like a weird old man.
He isn't harumph at all He's so harumph! What's wrong with that?! That's the point! That makes him cool! So he wasn't "fine and dandy" at all I'm sorry.
I had no idea.
I have no idea why you're apologizing! But Is it okay if I say something? KATO-chan, at his age Gets completely naked when he takes a crap Isn't that taboo? I'm sorry I had no idea How could you possibly know that anyway?! KATO-chan and KEN-chan are hurting and tired How?! If only we could make some cha-han rice to cheer them up But we're so useless A little girl who's rarely used a knife in the kitchen could never cook anything full of love to cheer someone up We had no chance from the beginning What's with the gloomy mood? How did we go from KATO-chan pooping naked to this? Why is Kyubei-san joining in? It isn't impossible! Mentaiko? Teacher, we're done! Please try it.
[KATO SHIMURA "Go get 'em".]
Disgusting.
But If I were KATO-chan KEN-chan, I couldn't accept this.
Now get going.
I have nothing to teach you.
Cooking is about love.
Never forget those words.
Okay! We did it! We've been titled masters.
A master, huh? Now Gin-chan can't complain! Teacher, who is this? That's what I want to know.
Who is KATO-chan KEN-chan? No idea In any case, it's a good thing you got rid of those nuisances.
Let's repeat it, so we don't forget.
Good idea.
Cooking is about Love! Hopeless.
Boy, the year's already over, huh? Sure was fast.
I hate how the year goes by faster as we get older.
At this rate, by the time I'm an old geezer the years will pass at the speed of a Formula 1 car.
I've still got a long ways to go.
Well, I'm already up to Ben Johnson speed, I'd say.
My Ben Johnson is already up to here.
Don't get too cocky because you're all still young.
Your Ben Johnson will fall behind soon enough.
For real? Ben Johnson's gonna fall out?? I prefer Carl Lewis over Ben Johnson.
He's cooler.
Well, all I'm saying is, we all had a pretty good year, right? Hell no! It's still January! And haven't we had the exact same conversation three years in a row?! That's 'cause this whole segment was recycled.
Yeah.
Not just the lines either.
The video's the same, too.
Your lines are exactly the same as the ones from last year! Well, you know They've been working hard on this anime.
But you know It's the end of the year and they're also working on the movie.
The staff's gotten used to slacking at a TV schedule the last four years.
It doesn't take long for them to run out of steam.
They're the type you expect to start clutching their stomachs before they've even left the starting area of a marathon.
Nobody wants to hear about whining behind the scenes.
Besides, this is why you usually have another team ready to go, right? That's how all the other anime do it.
Well, come April, the movie will be complete and the TV series will end.
We can all rest easy.
Not only can we rest easy, but we'll all be unemployed.
Yeah, we won't be able to laugh at Hasegawa-san anymore.
Uh, wait Did you just say that the TV series will end? The show's ending in April? What are you saying, Pachi-boy? Didn't we say that we were entering the final arc back in episode 125? I only tell the truth.
Grown adults would never lie about ending a show Hold on! Who would remember something you said a year ago?! Entering the final stage of the final arc.
And so, I'm sure that some of you were wondering about the number by the title this week.
I shall explain now! A countdown really began back when we said it would.
Huh? Really? Well, at one point, we realized that we miscounted, so we counted 19 twice to hide that fact.
You just told everybody! Why is this final little gimmick still half-assed?! But this time, we're telling the truth about this show ending.
The boy who cried wolf was telling the truth in the end.
Though that was when he died.
And we only have a few numbers left in this new year.
But I don't really like having a movie right after the TV show ends.
Like how those recent TV dramas do it? Air a wishy-washy final episode and go, "To be continued in the movie.
" The TV show ends up feeling like a promotion for the movie.
That's insulting the viewers who've been watching every week! I would never go see one of those movies! You'd better not be fooled by these sneaky ticket sets! Wait! Why is that the only footage that's new?! And it has nothing to do with the movie! Besides, movie previews these days are just a bunch of tempting scenes.
We're going to be playing a commercial right after this, so you'd better not be fooled.
Yeah, something like this! If you have time to plan out a pretty death, ["Witness the end of GinTama the anime".]
why not live a pretty life to the very end? ["on the big screen!!".]
GinTama the Movie.
Benizakura Arc: the New Interpretation ["Saturday, April 24th.
It ends for real.
".]
That's way too tempting!! [Preview.]
Why did he have to come now? We're about to battle it out with the Anti-Foreigner Faction Why? Why now, Tarzan?! ["Whenever I hear the word "Leviathan", silly old me, I immediately think about Sazae-san!!".]
[The staff went ahead and ate the tasty cha-han rice from the gag in this episode.
.]
[The scent of the wakame in the cha-han was intense.
.]
[See you next time.
.]