The Incredible Hulk (1978) s05e01 Episode Script
The Phenom
This is a big chance for you.
You're gonna knock them dead.
Look out! That green thing.
Did you see it? He just looks like another ball player to me.
This kid could be a gold mine.
I want him, Audrey.
(ROARS) NARRATOR: Dr.
David Banner, physician, scientist.
Searching for a way to tap into the hidden strengths that all humans have.
Then, an accidental overdose of gamma radiation alters his body chemistry.
And now, when David Banner grows angry or outraged, a startling metamorphosis occurs.
(ROARS) The creature is driven by rage and pursued by an investigative reporter.
Mr.
McGee, don't make me angry.
You wouldn't like me when I'm angry.
The creature is wanted for a murder he didn't commit.
David Banner is believed to be dead.
And he must let the world think that he is dead until he can find a way to control the raging spirit that dwells within him.
(ROARS) (GROANS) Enough! Shoot, I was just getting warmed up.
Yeah, well, I tell you what, why don't we just get to Florida before I lose my palm.
(LAUGHS) Why not? Anyway, we made it to the state finals.
Champs of all North Carolina.
High school? No.
Semi-pro.
Oh.
I threw a no-hitter, struck out 21.
My coach called every team in the majors, and the first one that showed up was a scout for the Roosters.
Well, no kidding.
He must've been pretty impressed.
I hope so.
That's when he told me to come to their spring training camp in West Palm Beach.
Said I was a cinch to make the team.
Said I was a "phenom.
" Ah! You know what he meant by that? Oh, I think I have a pretty good idea.
Yeah.
What is it? "Phenom.
" I would imagine that to be short for "phenomenon.
" Baseball jargon.
Yeah, right.
David, did you catch what that sign said? Uh, yeah.
Back there was the turn-off to Atlanta.
So we want to stay right in this lane.
Right.
This is my first time out of North Carolina.
Good thing I picked you up, I'd be totally lost.
(LAUGHS) Besides, you're not too bad a catcher.
Well, thank you.
Where're you going from West Palm Beach? Well, I'm going to Miami.
Of course, I could be going to New Orleans because that last turn off back there was the way to Miami.
Of course, we can always turn around at the next corner.
Right.
Sorry, I guess I wasn't paying much attention.
I can't quit I can't quit thinking about my tryout.
Getting nervous? You bet.
All right, I'll tell you what, why don't you pull over down here.
I will do the driving, and you can do the resting.
All right.
Hey.
West Palm Beach Arms.
It looks inexpensive enough.
Hey, Joe.
I wish you a lot of luck and all the best.
And thank you very much for the ride.
Hey, wait.
Hey, wait a second.
Listen, where are you going? To Miami, Cotton Labs.
Hopefully to get a job.
Now? I was hoping you was gonna stay and watch me try out tomorrow.
Besides, it's the middle of the night.
How are you gonna get to Miami in the middle of the night? It's a pretty well-traveled highway.
Well, wait, I don't even know if they got a room available.
Right.
Hey, relax, Joe.
Knock 'em dead tomorrow.
Okay? I thought we were buddies.
We've been through three states together.
I'm gonna be all alone out there tomorrow.
I don't make it, it's back to Crows Landing driving a tractor.
You ever been alone? Nobody pulling for you? I guess it is getting pretty late.
I guess you got me pegged.
First, the highway signs, now this.
Fact is, I can't read or write much.
Hey, come on, let's go.
It's kind of a long story.
Thanks for staying.
(PEOPLE CHATTERING) Come on, Moose! Smash it! (SPECTATORS APPLAUDING) Hey, come on, can't we get out of here? I'm thirsty.
Wait.
Hey, Soos.
Maybe the best hitter in the league, even if he can't speak the language.
Saw you guys check in last night.
I'm impressed.
McCormack, Cyrus T.
The Wordsman.
Sporting World, inside page? Syndicated in 137 rags across these United States? Never heard of me? Oh, I don't get a chance to follow sports very much.
(CHUCKLES) Jeez, that kid is good.
(PEOPLE EXCLAIMING) Every spring the weather gets hotter and the kids get faster.
Care to join me in a drink, Mr.
Uh Bedecker.
David Bedecker.
No, I think I'll pass.
This is not your pure Florida Citrus, but nonetheless, this juice is not without its replenishing qualities.
Ah.
So, you're a buddy of the kid, huh? What's the scoop? He just looks like another ball player to me.
Not this one.
By no means.
What's your problem, Devlin? There's only one pitching spot open on the Roosters, and you already handle the top three babies up from the minors.
You're gonna do okay.
This kid could be a goldmine.
My other three clients are bread and butter.
This one is nine courses.
I want him, Audrey.
Okay, Mr.
Bedecker, that's fine.
A word of advice before I retire to my suite to create tomorrow's clichés.
If you haven't noticed, there is a life-form masquerading as a human being in the third row of the bleachers.
Yeah, that's it, next to that cheap flash of red.
His name is Bernard Devlin.
He's an agent, and he's got his eye on your buddy.
Don't! I repeat, don't let him get anywhere near that kid.
He will cheat him, he will defile him, he will corrupt him.
In other words, you're looking at more than 10%.
Be forewarned.
Good day, sir.
(SPECTATORS CHEERING) Stop! No more! Stop! You're embarrassing my hitters! (LAUGHS) So, what did you think? Oh, I'm impressed.
Kiddo, you're a natural! I'd like to have a whole team of you.
Well, I made it? Well, the General Manager, Mr.
Johnson, has to see you.
Well, what's that mean? That means that you're starting for the "A" team in the intra-squad game tomorrow.
If he likes you, you're in.
If he don't like you Charley Sepikis is going into the aluminum siding business.
Boy! With you going every fourth day, we'd be a contender.
A bona fide contender! Now go soak your arm till then.
Take care of it.
It's magic.
Oh, you handling him? Oh, no, no.
I'm just a friend.
I'm leaving for Miami tomorrow.
Oh.
Get yourself a good agent, kiddo.
One that can count real high.
Ooh.
(SINGING) Happy birthday Here.
Premium stuff.
You can't buy it in a store.
You know what I want.
Forget it.
Ah! Taste of resolve.
But just a taste.
I've known you for a long time, Wordsman.
Forever.
your reputation belongs to me.
I've given you stories you couldn't get anywhere else.
Remember the Drabowski cover-up in St.
Louis? Now, I'm asking you to do me a favor.
Help steer that kid my way.
You can do it.
I can't.
It won't do any good.
(CHUCKLES) Good's irrelevant.
You tell that to David Bedecker.
He's the guy with the kid.
They're very tight.
You're too late, Devlin.
I don't think so.
But I bet we find out just how tight they really are.
(SIGHS) Oh, I wanna thank you for that dinner.
It was very filling.
Well, I couldn't have done it without you.
I mean, you just being there.
It really helped me.
I'm glad.
You're still splitting? Yeah, I am.
Well, that's what's magic.
Charley Sepikis said my arm was magic, but it's those letters and words in those books of yours.
That's where it's at.
I never had much chance to learn.
My dad ran off when I was a kid.
Between running the farm and baseball, I guess there just wasn't much time for schooling.
Not much anyway.
Do you think you could do me one more favor? It's a really big one.
Sure.
Well, being that I'm tired and I got to keep soaking my arm, do you think you could go across the street and get me a fresh bag of ice? Be glad to.
And maybe a strawberry milkshake? A strawberry milkshake after that dinner we had? Strawberry milkshake.
You are a phenom.
McCORMACK: Syndicated in I beg your pardon, young man, I wonder if I might impose? Oh, there's a friendly face.
Hey, give me a hand, will you, Bedecker? (KNOCKING ON DOOR) David.
Hello, Joe.
Mind if I come in? Wait.
I got to turn that light on.
Wait a minute.
Here you go.
Thank you, Bedecker, thank you.
It's okay, it's okay.
Hey, did I tell you I almost won the Pulitzer in '54? No.
You didn't tell me.
I still remember the speech.
Hey, you wanna hear my speech? I remember it.
Not now, Cyrus.
Thank you very much.
(PHONE RINGING) Hey, Bedecker, wait a minute.
Could you get the phone? The phone is ringing.
I know the phone is ringing, Cyrus.
Hello.
What happened to McCormack? This is his editor.
(CLEARS THROAT) Uh, look, I'm afraid he's not available right now.
Look, may I take a message? Yeah, I got a message.
You tell that gin-soaked tub of lard if he doesn't have his two-day late story filed by tomorrow morning, he's fired! You tell him that! Uh (DIAL TONE) Your Excellency, distinguished guests, ladies and gentlemen Great pleasure to be here in Oslo tonight.
What for? To accept Cyrus.
That was your editor on the phone.
Your editor, remember him? He says if you don't file your story, you're gonna lose your job.
What? You're going to lose your job, Cyrus.
Hey, Bedecker, I need your help.
Help? I'm trying to help you, Cyrus.
I'm trying to make some coffee No.
No, I need your help! I got my notes, my story.
I need your help.
Oh, oh, no.
Oh, no! Hey, Bedecker, please.
You got to help me here.
I can't.
Cyrus, I can't.
All you have to do is flesh it out with words.
All the notes are right here.
I can't write your story for you.
(STAMMERING) It's about the kid.
But that isn't the point.
I can't I just simply can't do Bedecker, please do this for me, will you? No, Cyrus, please.
Cyrus, I can't.
I can't.
Please! Cyrus? (RINGING) (SNORING) DAVID: That's right, the name is Dunning.
D-U-N-N-l-N-G.
Mmm-hmm.
Yes, that's all of it.
Tell him it's a little too long? Yes, fine, all right, I will.
Bye.
Too long! MAN: Good shot! No, I ain't seen him.
If you do, remind him he's pitching in the intra-squad game.
Kids these days can't remember nothing.
Garcia! McCORMACK: Bedecker.
Bedecker, my career is in your hands.
I'd credit you with a save in the box score of life.
That's all right, you were in a jam.
Which you nobly got me out of.
Whatever it is you do, young man, you've missed your calling.
Cassidy, my editor, said it was the best writing I've done all year.
And he's right, it was.
A little long, maybe.
Bedecker, I owe you.
No, no, you left great notes.
But they were your words.
I owe you.
Here's a C-note for your trouble.
Take it.
No, really, I couldn't.
Please.
I insist.
Cyrus, I do appreciate it, but I cannot accept it.
There are no buts about it.
This is strictly business.
Take it.
I have a proposition for you.
You see, Mr.
Bedecker, the plain and simple truth is, I'm tired.
As you may have noticed, I tend to indulge my weaknesses to the extreme.
What I need is some time to dry out, to get my head clear.
You could give me that time.
I could? By helping me with my column.
With my notes, of course.
I'll give you You hang around spring training a few weeks, you could make yourself a couple of grand.
Strictly a business arrangement.
Is the money okay? Yes.
JOE: This is some breakfast.
(LAUGHS) Are you sure you want more milk in your bourbon? Because I don't think I have any left.
That's okay, Audrey.
Anything you got, I like.
For the first time in my life, I think I'm in love.
Oh, Joe, me, too.
You know, from the minute I saw you out there on that field, throwing that baseball, I knew you were special.
And that's what I told Devlin, too.
The guy who's gonna help my career? Mmm-hmm.
Right.
Right.
He's gonna be here pretty soon, you know.
Now, listen.
I want you to listen to him, Joe.
He can make you a millionaire.
You can have endorsements and deferred salaries.
All of this is, of course, if he wants you.
But I think he's gonna want you.
Audrey.
I'll give you the notes on the next column some time tomorrow.
Oh, fine.
This time, how about, say, a couple of hours before deadline and legible, please.
Hey, what do you think you're getting paid for? Hey, listen, have you seen Joe around? I just remembered one of the reasons I drink.
Forgive the truisms of a tired old hack, but one of those reasons is to forget.
I ran into Devlin yesterday, I also owe him some favors and he came to collect.
Joe? The very.
I tried to refuse, but that man can be very persuasive.
He wanted me to get him access to the kid.
I didn't know what to do, so I went out and got drunk.
Got drunk, got you involved, and left that kid wide open, like a lamb waiting for the slaughter.
I'll lay you 8 to 5 he's setting the kid up with that siren of his right now.
Surefire scam number six.
Well, Sepikis is worried about him.
Now, do you have any idea where he might be? Yeah.
A good one.
Yes? Excuse me, is Joe here? AUDREY: He's busy right now.
DAVID: Just for a moment, please.
Why don't you just leave, mister? JOE: Buddy! Hey, where's my milkshake? Uh, can I speak to you, Joe? In private.
Heck, David, whatever you got to say to me, you can say it in front of Audrey.
See, Audrey and me are engaged, kind of.
Oh! Well, Joe, let's go back to the motel, okay? I think the only one going back to the motel will be you.
You lose, pal.
He's mine.
Joe, I just want you to be careful what it is you sign.
I wouldn't like to see you used.
(SCOFFS) Used? Oh, Joe, don't you know that these are the kind of people that are gonna use you? The hangers on, and the parasites.
Don't trust him, Joe.
Besides, I thought you were going to Miami.
I have a job here.
Ah-ha! See? So he could be here with you, so he could represent you, and so he could take your money.
Do you believe that, Joe? You better get out of here.
Show the gentleman the stairs.
Hey! (HULK ROARING) (GROWLING) (SCREAMING) Leave her alone! Go on, get out of here.
(PEOPLE CHATTERING) You stood up to that thing.
You stood up to that thing for me, didn't you? (KNOCK ON DOOR) McCORMACK: Bedecker, you in there? You find the kid okay? Yeah.
Yeah, I found him.
I'll be leaving for Miami, will you please give this to Joe? I take it you got there too late.
That's a real shame.
I hate to Hey! What is this? You're quitting on me? Yeah.
Well, what about the job? What is it, money? I'll give you more.
No, something's come up.
I have to leave.
Bedecker! All right, what about the kid? Your friend? He has all the tools, it's up to him.
Take it from me, sometimes the tools aren't enough.
AUDREY: I can't believe it.
I really can't believe it.
You stood up to that thing.
You stood up to that thing and you did it for me.
And you had a chair in your hands.
You know, this is probably gonna sound really silly, but That's the first nice thing anybody's done for me in a very long time.
I got to find David.
Joe, listen He was only trying to help! And I didn't lift a finger.
He was being my friend.
I'm your friend, Joe.
I wanna be your friend.
Stay with me, Joe.
Please, don't leave.
Because Devlin's coming back? No.
Because of me.
You mean that? Yes.
But why? You were trying to trick me.
I know I was.
(SIGHS) But I've also been tricking myself for a very long time.
Please, Joe.
I'll come back for you, Audrey.
I will.
But first I got to find David.
I got to tell him I'm sorry! I'll be at the stadium.
I'll be there.
You won't reconsider? I can't.
Good luck to you, Cyrus.
Same to you.
Listen, Bedecker, I'll do what I can for the kid.
I don't know what.
Maybe write a column about crooked sports agents.
Anyhow, it's time I stopped depending upon the kindness of strangers.
Bye-bye.
So long.
I'll ask you one more time, where is he? I don't know.
He dumped me.
That hayseed? You'll never be as good a liar as I am.
You don't get the practice and you don't have the brains.
Now, I have a contract for him to sign and I wanna know where he is.
No more games.
Okay.
No more games.
I want out.
You want out? Audrey, you got a very short memory.
I remember when you wanted in.
When those big brown eyes gleamed with desperation and hunger.
When you begged and pleaded for what I could offer you.
I saved your soul, honey.
I sold you my soul.
Where's the kid? He wanted you to have this.
Where did he go? Miami.
Cotton Labs.
He said Cotton Labs.
Hey, what the hell are you doing? Are you crazy? You got a game to pitch later.
It don't matter none.
I got to tell him I'm sorry.
You leave now, you're gonna blow your whole career.
The General Manager's gonna be there.
Now don't be stupid, Joe.
I've been stupid.
All right, I write him off.
I write you off.
Let him pay for your condo and your furs.
I learned a long time ago to cut my losses.
If Joe Dunning doesn't pitch in the intra-squad game later, one of my boys will.
So you go to your little hayseed, but you tell him if he shows up anywhere around Rooster Park, he's gonna regret it.
Speaking of regrets.
I'm really sorry that things turned out this way.
But I guess to ask a leopard to change her spots is indeed impossible.
I'll see you around.
Where is that kid? He's gonna blow it.
How's it going, Charley? I tell you, Wordsman, I hate the modern day ballplayer.
They don't have the hustle, the drive that you and me had.
It's an hour before game time, the kid ought to be here warming up.
The General Manager's here.
Made a special trip down here to see him.
I don't understand these kids.
He's probably someplace blow drying his hair so he'll look good.
Give me a break.
What are you gonna do if he doesn't show up? There's nothing I can do.
Start one of the rookies.
Today's the day I got a firm up my roster.
I tell you, Wordsman, I sure hope that kid shows up.
I'd like to enjoy a nice, quiet ballgame.
Hi, I'm heading for Miami (HORN HONKING) David! I got to talk to you.
Thanks, anyway.
Get in, I'll take you to Miami.
I can get there on my own, Joe.
I came out here to tell you I was sorry for what I did.
Sorry for being such a dumb, stupid kid who doesn't know what a friend is.
I wanna apologize.
Accepted.
Something just came over me that took everything away I ever knew about right and wrong.
You know what I mean? It was like it wasn't me who was doing it, but it was.
I can't explain it.
And that green thing.
Did you see it? You have a game to pitch, don't you, Joe? I'm taking you to Miami.
No, I suggest you get in this car and turn around and get back there.
This is a big chance for you, you're gonna knock 'em dead.
Then I'd like you to be there, too.
I'd like to go, Joe, but I can't go back to West Palm Beach.
Well, just to the stadium.
And as soon as the game is over, I'll bring you back.
It'll only take a couple of hours.
You don't need me, Joe.
I know that.
I know I got to do it by myself.
But it sure would help.
Come on.
ANNOUNCER ON PA: Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to the New Jersey Roosters' final intra-squad game.
And now, the line ups.
Leading off and playing first base for the B team is Alan Cassidy.
(SPECTATORS LAUGHING) Batting second is Bobby Stovall.
Hitting third, left-fielder Craig Schiller.
Batting clean-up, third baseman Fred Law.
Hitting fifth, right-fielder George Ohanian.
Hi.
(ANNOUNCER CONTINUES CHATTERING) You haven't by any chance seen Joe anywhere, have you? What's it to you? A lot.
What are you writing? An obituary.
(TRUMPET BLOWING) (SPECTATORS CHEERING) ANNOUNCER ON PA: Leading off for the A team is second baseman Lou Montejano.
Batting second, pitcher Bob Wingo! Hitting third, playing centerfield, Eddie Rio.
Batting clean-up, playing first base Hey, sorry.
It's a sell-out.
Hey, what's going on? Move.
Why don't you just leave, before I break your future? Hey, guys.
You get out of the way! (GROANING) (ROARS) Hey, what are you doing? What's going on? (SPECTATORS CHEERING) Well, I guess that's it.
Get Ted What's-his-name in there to pitch.
G.
M.
's orders.
(HULK ROARS) (PEOPLE EXCLAIMING) (PEOPLE SCREAMING) Look out! (PEOPLE EXCLAIMING) (PEOPLE SCREAMING) Here.
Well, now that you've made the team, there's a couple of things I want to say.
One, you have got to get yourself a good agent.
How about you? I've considered it.
But it would be a conflict of interest.
I'll try and steer you to somebody good.
And two, it's about time you learned how to read.
I need all the fans I can get.
That's gonna be my department.
Seems to me you're one lucky kid.
Yeah.
I can't get over it.
You mean that green man? And twice that thing got me out of jams.
The first time when it opened my eyes.
The second, it saved my career.
And my friend, David.
I'm sure gonna miss him.
You're gonna knock them dead.
Look out! That green thing.
Did you see it? He just looks like another ball player to me.
This kid could be a gold mine.
I want him, Audrey.
(ROARS) NARRATOR: Dr.
David Banner, physician, scientist.
Searching for a way to tap into the hidden strengths that all humans have.
Then, an accidental overdose of gamma radiation alters his body chemistry.
And now, when David Banner grows angry or outraged, a startling metamorphosis occurs.
(ROARS) The creature is driven by rage and pursued by an investigative reporter.
Mr.
McGee, don't make me angry.
You wouldn't like me when I'm angry.
The creature is wanted for a murder he didn't commit.
David Banner is believed to be dead.
And he must let the world think that he is dead until he can find a way to control the raging spirit that dwells within him.
(ROARS) (GROANS) Enough! Shoot, I was just getting warmed up.
Yeah, well, I tell you what, why don't we just get to Florida before I lose my palm.
(LAUGHS) Why not? Anyway, we made it to the state finals.
Champs of all North Carolina.
High school? No.
Semi-pro.
Oh.
I threw a no-hitter, struck out 21.
My coach called every team in the majors, and the first one that showed up was a scout for the Roosters.
Well, no kidding.
He must've been pretty impressed.
I hope so.
That's when he told me to come to their spring training camp in West Palm Beach.
Said I was a cinch to make the team.
Said I was a "phenom.
" Ah! You know what he meant by that? Oh, I think I have a pretty good idea.
Yeah.
What is it? "Phenom.
" I would imagine that to be short for "phenomenon.
" Baseball jargon.
Yeah, right.
David, did you catch what that sign said? Uh, yeah.
Back there was the turn-off to Atlanta.
So we want to stay right in this lane.
Right.
This is my first time out of North Carolina.
Good thing I picked you up, I'd be totally lost.
(LAUGHS) Besides, you're not too bad a catcher.
Well, thank you.
Where're you going from West Palm Beach? Well, I'm going to Miami.
Of course, I could be going to New Orleans because that last turn off back there was the way to Miami.
Of course, we can always turn around at the next corner.
Right.
Sorry, I guess I wasn't paying much attention.
I can't quit I can't quit thinking about my tryout.
Getting nervous? You bet.
All right, I'll tell you what, why don't you pull over down here.
I will do the driving, and you can do the resting.
All right.
Hey.
West Palm Beach Arms.
It looks inexpensive enough.
Hey, Joe.
I wish you a lot of luck and all the best.
And thank you very much for the ride.
Hey, wait.
Hey, wait a second.
Listen, where are you going? To Miami, Cotton Labs.
Hopefully to get a job.
Now? I was hoping you was gonna stay and watch me try out tomorrow.
Besides, it's the middle of the night.
How are you gonna get to Miami in the middle of the night? It's a pretty well-traveled highway.
Well, wait, I don't even know if they got a room available.
Right.
Hey, relax, Joe.
Knock 'em dead tomorrow.
Okay? I thought we were buddies.
We've been through three states together.
I'm gonna be all alone out there tomorrow.
I don't make it, it's back to Crows Landing driving a tractor.
You ever been alone? Nobody pulling for you? I guess it is getting pretty late.
I guess you got me pegged.
First, the highway signs, now this.
Fact is, I can't read or write much.
Hey, come on, let's go.
It's kind of a long story.
Thanks for staying.
(PEOPLE CHATTERING) Come on, Moose! Smash it! (SPECTATORS APPLAUDING) Hey, come on, can't we get out of here? I'm thirsty.
Wait.
Hey, Soos.
Maybe the best hitter in the league, even if he can't speak the language.
Saw you guys check in last night.
I'm impressed.
McCormack, Cyrus T.
The Wordsman.
Sporting World, inside page? Syndicated in 137 rags across these United States? Never heard of me? Oh, I don't get a chance to follow sports very much.
(CHUCKLES) Jeez, that kid is good.
(PEOPLE EXCLAIMING) Every spring the weather gets hotter and the kids get faster.
Care to join me in a drink, Mr.
Uh Bedecker.
David Bedecker.
No, I think I'll pass.
This is not your pure Florida Citrus, but nonetheless, this juice is not without its replenishing qualities.
Ah.
So, you're a buddy of the kid, huh? What's the scoop? He just looks like another ball player to me.
Not this one.
By no means.
What's your problem, Devlin? There's only one pitching spot open on the Roosters, and you already handle the top three babies up from the minors.
You're gonna do okay.
This kid could be a goldmine.
My other three clients are bread and butter.
This one is nine courses.
I want him, Audrey.
Okay, Mr.
Bedecker, that's fine.
A word of advice before I retire to my suite to create tomorrow's clichés.
If you haven't noticed, there is a life-form masquerading as a human being in the third row of the bleachers.
Yeah, that's it, next to that cheap flash of red.
His name is Bernard Devlin.
He's an agent, and he's got his eye on your buddy.
Don't! I repeat, don't let him get anywhere near that kid.
He will cheat him, he will defile him, he will corrupt him.
In other words, you're looking at more than 10%.
Be forewarned.
Good day, sir.
(SPECTATORS CHEERING) Stop! No more! Stop! You're embarrassing my hitters! (LAUGHS) So, what did you think? Oh, I'm impressed.
Kiddo, you're a natural! I'd like to have a whole team of you.
Well, I made it? Well, the General Manager, Mr.
Johnson, has to see you.
Well, what's that mean? That means that you're starting for the "A" team in the intra-squad game tomorrow.
If he likes you, you're in.
If he don't like you Charley Sepikis is going into the aluminum siding business.
Boy! With you going every fourth day, we'd be a contender.
A bona fide contender! Now go soak your arm till then.
Take care of it.
It's magic.
Oh, you handling him? Oh, no, no.
I'm just a friend.
I'm leaving for Miami tomorrow.
Oh.
Get yourself a good agent, kiddo.
One that can count real high.
Ooh.
(SINGING) Happy birthday Here.
Premium stuff.
You can't buy it in a store.
You know what I want.
Forget it.
Ah! Taste of resolve.
But just a taste.
I've known you for a long time, Wordsman.
Forever.
your reputation belongs to me.
I've given you stories you couldn't get anywhere else.
Remember the Drabowski cover-up in St.
Louis? Now, I'm asking you to do me a favor.
Help steer that kid my way.
You can do it.
I can't.
It won't do any good.
(CHUCKLES) Good's irrelevant.
You tell that to David Bedecker.
He's the guy with the kid.
They're very tight.
You're too late, Devlin.
I don't think so.
But I bet we find out just how tight they really are.
(SIGHS) Oh, I wanna thank you for that dinner.
It was very filling.
Well, I couldn't have done it without you.
I mean, you just being there.
It really helped me.
I'm glad.
You're still splitting? Yeah, I am.
Well, that's what's magic.
Charley Sepikis said my arm was magic, but it's those letters and words in those books of yours.
That's where it's at.
I never had much chance to learn.
My dad ran off when I was a kid.
Between running the farm and baseball, I guess there just wasn't much time for schooling.
Not much anyway.
Do you think you could do me one more favor? It's a really big one.
Sure.
Well, being that I'm tired and I got to keep soaking my arm, do you think you could go across the street and get me a fresh bag of ice? Be glad to.
And maybe a strawberry milkshake? A strawberry milkshake after that dinner we had? Strawberry milkshake.
You are a phenom.
McCORMACK: Syndicated in I beg your pardon, young man, I wonder if I might impose? Oh, there's a friendly face.
Hey, give me a hand, will you, Bedecker? (KNOCKING ON DOOR) David.
Hello, Joe.
Mind if I come in? Wait.
I got to turn that light on.
Wait a minute.
Here you go.
Thank you, Bedecker, thank you.
It's okay, it's okay.
Hey, did I tell you I almost won the Pulitzer in '54? No.
You didn't tell me.
I still remember the speech.
Hey, you wanna hear my speech? I remember it.
Not now, Cyrus.
Thank you very much.
(PHONE RINGING) Hey, Bedecker, wait a minute.
Could you get the phone? The phone is ringing.
I know the phone is ringing, Cyrus.
Hello.
What happened to McCormack? This is his editor.
(CLEARS THROAT) Uh, look, I'm afraid he's not available right now.
Look, may I take a message? Yeah, I got a message.
You tell that gin-soaked tub of lard if he doesn't have his two-day late story filed by tomorrow morning, he's fired! You tell him that! Uh (DIAL TONE) Your Excellency, distinguished guests, ladies and gentlemen Great pleasure to be here in Oslo tonight.
What for? To accept Cyrus.
That was your editor on the phone.
Your editor, remember him? He says if you don't file your story, you're gonna lose your job.
What? You're going to lose your job, Cyrus.
Hey, Bedecker, I need your help.
Help? I'm trying to help you, Cyrus.
I'm trying to make some coffee No.
No, I need your help! I got my notes, my story.
I need your help.
Oh, oh, no.
Oh, no! Hey, Bedecker, please.
You got to help me here.
I can't.
Cyrus, I can't.
All you have to do is flesh it out with words.
All the notes are right here.
I can't write your story for you.
(STAMMERING) It's about the kid.
But that isn't the point.
I can't I just simply can't do Bedecker, please do this for me, will you? No, Cyrus, please.
Cyrus, I can't.
I can't.
Please! Cyrus? (RINGING) (SNORING) DAVID: That's right, the name is Dunning.
D-U-N-N-l-N-G.
Mmm-hmm.
Yes, that's all of it.
Tell him it's a little too long? Yes, fine, all right, I will.
Bye.
Too long! MAN: Good shot! No, I ain't seen him.
If you do, remind him he's pitching in the intra-squad game.
Kids these days can't remember nothing.
Garcia! McCORMACK: Bedecker.
Bedecker, my career is in your hands.
I'd credit you with a save in the box score of life.
That's all right, you were in a jam.
Which you nobly got me out of.
Whatever it is you do, young man, you've missed your calling.
Cassidy, my editor, said it was the best writing I've done all year.
And he's right, it was.
A little long, maybe.
Bedecker, I owe you.
No, no, you left great notes.
But they were your words.
I owe you.
Here's a C-note for your trouble.
Take it.
No, really, I couldn't.
Please.
I insist.
Cyrus, I do appreciate it, but I cannot accept it.
There are no buts about it.
This is strictly business.
Take it.
I have a proposition for you.
You see, Mr.
Bedecker, the plain and simple truth is, I'm tired.
As you may have noticed, I tend to indulge my weaknesses to the extreme.
What I need is some time to dry out, to get my head clear.
You could give me that time.
I could? By helping me with my column.
With my notes, of course.
I'll give you You hang around spring training a few weeks, you could make yourself a couple of grand.
Strictly a business arrangement.
Is the money okay? Yes.
JOE: This is some breakfast.
(LAUGHS) Are you sure you want more milk in your bourbon? Because I don't think I have any left.
That's okay, Audrey.
Anything you got, I like.
For the first time in my life, I think I'm in love.
Oh, Joe, me, too.
You know, from the minute I saw you out there on that field, throwing that baseball, I knew you were special.
And that's what I told Devlin, too.
The guy who's gonna help my career? Mmm-hmm.
Right.
Right.
He's gonna be here pretty soon, you know.
Now, listen.
I want you to listen to him, Joe.
He can make you a millionaire.
You can have endorsements and deferred salaries.
All of this is, of course, if he wants you.
But I think he's gonna want you.
Audrey.
I'll give you the notes on the next column some time tomorrow.
Oh, fine.
This time, how about, say, a couple of hours before deadline and legible, please.
Hey, what do you think you're getting paid for? Hey, listen, have you seen Joe around? I just remembered one of the reasons I drink.
Forgive the truisms of a tired old hack, but one of those reasons is to forget.
I ran into Devlin yesterday, I also owe him some favors and he came to collect.
Joe? The very.
I tried to refuse, but that man can be very persuasive.
He wanted me to get him access to the kid.
I didn't know what to do, so I went out and got drunk.
Got drunk, got you involved, and left that kid wide open, like a lamb waiting for the slaughter.
I'll lay you 8 to 5 he's setting the kid up with that siren of his right now.
Surefire scam number six.
Well, Sepikis is worried about him.
Now, do you have any idea where he might be? Yeah.
A good one.
Yes? Excuse me, is Joe here? AUDREY: He's busy right now.
DAVID: Just for a moment, please.
Why don't you just leave, mister? JOE: Buddy! Hey, where's my milkshake? Uh, can I speak to you, Joe? In private.
Heck, David, whatever you got to say to me, you can say it in front of Audrey.
See, Audrey and me are engaged, kind of.
Oh! Well, Joe, let's go back to the motel, okay? I think the only one going back to the motel will be you.
You lose, pal.
He's mine.
Joe, I just want you to be careful what it is you sign.
I wouldn't like to see you used.
(SCOFFS) Used? Oh, Joe, don't you know that these are the kind of people that are gonna use you? The hangers on, and the parasites.
Don't trust him, Joe.
Besides, I thought you were going to Miami.
I have a job here.
Ah-ha! See? So he could be here with you, so he could represent you, and so he could take your money.
Do you believe that, Joe? You better get out of here.
Show the gentleman the stairs.
Hey! (HULK ROARING) (GROWLING) (SCREAMING) Leave her alone! Go on, get out of here.
(PEOPLE CHATTERING) You stood up to that thing.
You stood up to that thing for me, didn't you? (KNOCK ON DOOR) McCORMACK: Bedecker, you in there? You find the kid okay? Yeah.
Yeah, I found him.
I'll be leaving for Miami, will you please give this to Joe? I take it you got there too late.
That's a real shame.
I hate to Hey! What is this? You're quitting on me? Yeah.
Well, what about the job? What is it, money? I'll give you more.
No, something's come up.
I have to leave.
Bedecker! All right, what about the kid? Your friend? He has all the tools, it's up to him.
Take it from me, sometimes the tools aren't enough.
AUDREY: I can't believe it.
I really can't believe it.
You stood up to that thing.
You stood up to that thing and you did it for me.
And you had a chair in your hands.
You know, this is probably gonna sound really silly, but That's the first nice thing anybody's done for me in a very long time.
I got to find David.
Joe, listen He was only trying to help! And I didn't lift a finger.
He was being my friend.
I'm your friend, Joe.
I wanna be your friend.
Stay with me, Joe.
Please, don't leave.
Because Devlin's coming back? No.
Because of me.
You mean that? Yes.
But why? You were trying to trick me.
I know I was.
(SIGHS) But I've also been tricking myself for a very long time.
Please, Joe.
I'll come back for you, Audrey.
I will.
But first I got to find David.
I got to tell him I'm sorry! I'll be at the stadium.
I'll be there.
You won't reconsider? I can't.
Good luck to you, Cyrus.
Same to you.
Listen, Bedecker, I'll do what I can for the kid.
I don't know what.
Maybe write a column about crooked sports agents.
Anyhow, it's time I stopped depending upon the kindness of strangers.
Bye-bye.
So long.
I'll ask you one more time, where is he? I don't know.
He dumped me.
That hayseed? You'll never be as good a liar as I am.
You don't get the practice and you don't have the brains.
Now, I have a contract for him to sign and I wanna know where he is.
No more games.
Okay.
No more games.
I want out.
You want out? Audrey, you got a very short memory.
I remember when you wanted in.
When those big brown eyes gleamed with desperation and hunger.
When you begged and pleaded for what I could offer you.
I saved your soul, honey.
I sold you my soul.
Where's the kid? He wanted you to have this.
Where did he go? Miami.
Cotton Labs.
He said Cotton Labs.
Hey, what the hell are you doing? Are you crazy? You got a game to pitch later.
It don't matter none.
I got to tell him I'm sorry.
You leave now, you're gonna blow your whole career.
The General Manager's gonna be there.
Now don't be stupid, Joe.
I've been stupid.
All right, I write him off.
I write you off.
Let him pay for your condo and your furs.
I learned a long time ago to cut my losses.
If Joe Dunning doesn't pitch in the intra-squad game later, one of my boys will.
So you go to your little hayseed, but you tell him if he shows up anywhere around Rooster Park, he's gonna regret it.
Speaking of regrets.
I'm really sorry that things turned out this way.
But I guess to ask a leopard to change her spots is indeed impossible.
I'll see you around.
Where is that kid? He's gonna blow it.
How's it going, Charley? I tell you, Wordsman, I hate the modern day ballplayer.
They don't have the hustle, the drive that you and me had.
It's an hour before game time, the kid ought to be here warming up.
The General Manager's here.
Made a special trip down here to see him.
I don't understand these kids.
He's probably someplace blow drying his hair so he'll look good.
Give me a break.
What are you gonna do if he doesn't show up? There's nothing I can do.
Start one of the rookies.
Today's the day I got a firm up my roster.
I tell you, Wordsman, I sure hope that kid shows up.
I'd like to enjoy a nice, quiet ballgame.
Hi, I'm heading for Miami (HORN HONKING) David! I got to talk to you.
Thanks, anyway.
Get in, I'll take you to Miami.
I can get there on my own, Joe.
I came out here to tell you I was sorry for what I did.
Sorry for being such a dumb, stupid kid who doesn't know what a friend is.
I wanna apologize.
Accepted.
Something just came over me that took everything away I ever knew about right and wrong.
You know what I mean? It was like it wasn't me who was doing it, but it was.
I can't explain it.
And that green thing.
Did you see it? You have a game to pitch, don't you, Joe? I'm taking you to Miami.
No, I suggest you get in this car and turn around and get back there.
This is a big chance for you, you're gonna knock 'em dead.
Then I'd like you to be there, too.
I'd like to go, Joe, but I can't go back to West Palm Beach.
Well, just to the stadium.
And as soon as the game is over, I'll bring you back.
It'll only take a couple of hours.
You don't need me, Joe.
I know that.
I know I got to do it by myself.
But it sure would help.
Come on.
ANNOUNCER ON PA: Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to the New Jersey Roosters' final intra-squad game.
And now, the line ups.
Leading off and playing first base for the B team is Alan Cassidy.
(SPECTATORS LAUGHING) Batting second is Bobby Stovall.
Hitting third, left-fielder Craig Schiller.
Batting clean-up, third baseman Fred Law.
Hitting fifth, right-fielder George Ohanian.
Hi.
(ANNOUNCER CONTINUES CHATTERING) You haven't by any chance seen Joe anywhere, have you? What's it to you? A lot.
What are you writing? An obituary.
(TRUMPET BLOWING) (SPECTATORS CHEERING) ANNOUNCER ON PA: Leading off for the A team is second baseman Lou Montejano.
Batting second, pitcher Bob Wingo! Hitting third, playing centerfield, Eddie Rio.
Batting clean-up, playing first base Hey, sorry.
It's a sell-out.
Hey, what's going on? Move.
Why don't you just leave, before I break your future? Hey, guys.
You get out of the way! (GROANING) (ROARS) Hey, what are you doing? What's going on? (SPECTATORS CHEERING) Well, I guess that's it.
Get Ted What's-his-name in there to pitch.
G.
M.
's orders.
(HULK ROARS) (PEOPLE EXCLAIMING) (PEOPLE SCREAMING) Look out! (PEOPLE EXCLAIMING) (PEOPLE SCREAMING) Here.
Well, now that you've made the team, there's a couple of things I want to say.
One, you have got to get yourself a good agent.
How about you? I've considered it.
But it would be a conflict of interest.
I'll try and steer you to somebody good.
And two, it's about time you learned how to read.
I need all the fans I can get.
That's gonna be my department.
Seems to me you're one lucky kid.
Yeah.
I can't get over it.
You mean that green man? And twice that thing got me out of jams.
The first time when it opened my eyes.
The second, it saved my career.
And my friend, David.
I'm sure gonna miss him.