The A-Team (1983) s05e03 Episode Script
Firing Line
And so the trial of the legendary A-Team is finally over, ending perhaps the final chapter of a bygone era of the Vietnam legacy of Presidents Kennedy, Johnson and Nixon.
Colonel John Smith, Lieutenant Templeton Peck and Sergeant B.
A.
Baracus, found guilty on all counts.
All that remains is for their execution to be administered.
Perfect.
Parade, halt! Right face! Ready! Any last requests? My favorite year.
Present! Hey, hey.
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
I didn't even get to drink it.
Aim! Oh, wait.
Come on.
Come on, what's the point of a last request if you don't get it? I didn't even get her phone number.
No, no, no.
Hannibal! See you in the swamp, Lieutenant.
Fire! How'd you sleep? Like I didn't have a care in the world.
Patient's escaped! How could he? Oh, he was so upset about his friends, I even had him put in restraints.
What's up, Doc? Able Four to Empress One.
The fox is in the henhouse.
Freeze! You have illegally broken and entered this domicile which is actually a covert CIA operation.
For security reasons you are to empty the contents of your pockets on the floor and back out of the apartment Murdock! What are you doing here, huh? Where you been? You know, I like your doorbell setup.
You really expect people to fall for that? Most people do.
And what is this with "empty your pockets"? I mean, what're you doing? Shaking down guys as they're breaking into your apartment? Well, you see, I always got to replace that door molding, you know.
You take a shot like that, breaking into someone's abode, you get what you get.
I've been to the hospital three times looking for you.
Where you been? Well, I figured that there was somebody else looking for me besides you.
You ain't talking without substance.
You know, that guy Stockwell's people been calling here and asking for you.
I got to help my guys.
And I figure I only got about 12 hours, and I'm not gonna be able to do it alone.
Let me guess who you got in mind? You could say no.
But you won't like it.
No.
But I'd understand.
Hey, you and me, we're invincible.
Together, we can handle anything.
All right? Thanks.
Come on.
Freeze! Just about.
Ain't it the truth? Okay, sport, welcome to the barrio.
Mrs.
Manicotti, open up! Yo, Mrs.
Man Going down? I told them how to fix this just last week.
Able Four and Able Six should've been back by now.
Maybe they're still trying to contain the matter or just stopped off for a call of nature.
Then they don't belong in my unit.
We're sorry.
Really, we really are.
We didn't mean to interrupt.
And don't be concerned.
His partner will check in as soon as he checks out of county emergency.
Very good, Captain.
You managed to evade and then apprehend two class eight operatives in spite of your craziness.
Or perhaps because of it.
Well, how do you do? Frankie Santana, we've met once before, at your service and available for dinner Tuesdays and Thursdays.
What brings you here, Captain? Certainly not my men.
Why come of your own accord? Because I don't like wearing somebody else's straitjacket.
Besides, we have something in common.
We both want the A-Team alive and well.
Why would I want that? You know, all of my psychiatric training has taught me that why you want the A-Team alive and well is unimportant.
The important thing is you want the A-Team alive and well, which means if they're dead, they're no good.
Now, you allowed them to go out there in front of that jury, knowing full well that they were gonna be convicted.
And you sent them after Curtis knowing full well he was gonna put them right at the scene of Morrison's murder.
Now, you have very neatly and specifically lined us up and then We've all fallen into place exactly where we are.
Whoever judged you insane, Captain, should have his license lifted.
You are going to help me spring my friends.
Barrier Island, about 30 miles off the California coast.
It was once a US military installation, not unlike San Clemente.
The land is basically rock and shrub, no indications of soft terrain or soil.
Looks like somebody did a pretty good job at researching this stuff.
There is a reef on the northern shore and there is no actual beach or natural landing facilities except for a manmade wooden piling, here.
The execution that is scheduled for tomorrow at 8:00 a.
m.
will take place here.
The firing squad, led by Captain Underwood and consisting of eight sharpshooters, will be positioned here.
The prisoners are kept in a large single cell.
The only access is through this doorway.
The barracks have been reinforced with corrugated steel.
The only vessels that are permitted to approach the island must first be announced by radio from Fort Owen.
Any and all other vessels will be warned and fired upon if they attempt to land.
As you can see, Captain, escape, or rather, rescue is virtually impossible.
They'll be expecting you.
But not you.
I would say not.
Since, to them, I do not exist.
No, no, no, I'm gonna need you to pull some strings.
You're gonna have to help.
I just gave it to you.
Don't get greedy.
I'm not beyond doing anything that's necessary to accomplish this.
Don't underestimate me, Stockwell.
I obviously wouldn't.
Drop your arms and move away from them, or I shall release a fine gas into your part of the cabin.
He's bluffing.
He's bluffing.
I'm telling you, he's bluffing.
You think he's bluffing? No.
Me, either.
I never bluff, Mr.
Santana.
I never need to.
Knockout gas, right? Not poisonous.
I mean, we didn't do, like, stuff that deserves poisonous gas.
I mean, we did, like, knockout-gas kind of stuff.
Right? Take care of their removal.
And contact Captain Underwood.
Tell him I'm going to talk to the prisoners in two hours.
All of them? Yes.
I've no doubt that Colonel Smith is already planning his escape.
And if he should be successful, well, that wouldn't do at all, would it? Hello? Frankie? Where are we? Forget us, where are my pants? I got mine on.
Are my pants out there? I got Hey, there's a bum.
He's got my pants.
Hey, you come back here.
Get over here.
I am not putting these on.
We can't screw around.
The guys are gonna be facing the firing squad this morning in about My watch! That bum, he stole my watch! Oh, gee.
See, now, I have compassion for a fellow robbee.
That's all right.
I took this from Stockwell's folder.
Wait a minute, you filched that? Yeah.
This is a list of everybody who has clearance on the island.
Do you think it'll help? It'll help.
Where's Smith? Smith? Where is he? Oh, he moved to better accommodations.
Where's my sweet roll? Hurry up, Face.
Give me a break, B.
A.
, will you? It took me all night to turn this spoon into a lock pick.
I know I can do this.
Give me a couple more minutes here and We haven't got a couple of minutes, Face.
Face, B.
A.
, come on! Come on! Hannibal! Hannibal, how's that plan coming along for getting us out of here, huh? I'm still working out some kicks.
Hannibal! I can't go get what we need looking like this.
I gotta go home and change.
Home, home.
You can't go home.
Stockwell's gonna have men there.
Why would he let us go just to pick us up again? I don't know why this guy's done anything that he's done, but we gotta minimize our risks.
We're gonna bust the most notorious convicts out of a hyper-security installation.
How much more risk can there be? You know, you better get a move on.
We got less than two hours, Frankie.
All right.
If I'm a little late, it's 'cause I stopped off for a quick bottle of Sterno.
Bless me, Father, for I am about to sin.
We don't want any.
Man, what you want? We ain't got nothing to say to you.
I have a proposition for you.
The way other investments that he's suggested have turned out, how could we refuse? Colonel, it wouldn't hurt to listen.
Get out of here.
You make fewer mistakes than anyone I've ever come across with the exception of myself.
Don't make one at this stage of the game.
We're finished with unending manipulation.
It ends here, Colonel.
There's no place else to go.
That's why I have a final offer.
And it's good.
You know it's good, because what else have I to gain? You want us to join the outfit? I haven't spent so much time watching you to try to force three very square pegs into tiny round holes.
You don't join anybody, and nobody joins you.
What I'm offering is an alliance.
You and me.
The bottom line is now that you'll be higher on the wanted list than before.
You won't be sought for some embarrassing incident during the war.
You are convicted murderers now.
A manhunt, as you knew it, will be increased to the tenth power.
You can't escape that kind of concentrated effort, and I don't doubt that you will be in a shot-on-sight status.
But I can offer you an out.
I'm a little old to change profession, Stockwell.
Just a limited partnership.
I'd say a certain number of missions specified, somewhat marginal occupations, and for this, you'll be given a full pardon.
Wait a minute.
A full pardon? As in Presidential pardon? I'm sure I know someone who can reach the right people or person.
A specified number of missions and we're totally cleared.
We don't work for you or the government anymore.
By then, you can work for the local McDonald's for all I care.
But make no mistake.
These missions are obviously nothing I can give to standard operatives.
You must realize the possible consequences.
Suicide missions? Not all.
There you go.
"Not all.
" Well, yeah, it sounds terrific.
Hey, man, why should we trust you? Because I give you my word.
I've not done that till now.
And like you, Colonel, I do believe in some kind of honor to make it all right.
Even if it is our own particular brand.
How long do we have to let you know? I mean, before you get us out? Colonel, that's not part of the deal.
I can't get you out.
Say what? Wait a minute.
What do you mean you can't get us out of here? Well, I could not assist three federal prisoners, convicted of murder, in escaping.
Contact me upon your successful evasion of your current situation.
Then we have a deal.
But you must escape on your own.
Guard! Oh, how the hell are we gonna escape on our own? We got one whole card left.
Murdock.
Murdock! Murdock.
Ready! Aim! Come on, B.
A.
, let's go! Wait for me! Wait for me, Murdock! Wait for me! You promise to be my bestest buddy in the whole world? I promise! And never, never call me fool again? Never again! Cross my heart and hope to die! And to get a pilot's license and to share my apartment with me? No! No! Come on, two swinging singles sharing a giant-screen TV! Shoot! Shoot! Shoot! Shoot.
If Murdock gets us out of this, as far as I'm concerned, he can have anything he wants as long as I live.
I don't know.
I gotta think about this.
That's the launch arriving now.
Had to pick someone else up.
This must be visitors' day, Captain.
Father Stellini to administer last rites and offer absolution.
B.
A.
, what are you gonna have for your last meal? What? Your last meal.
See, I'm trying to figure out what I'm gonna have, and I thought Man, you're crazy.
You staring to sound just like Murdock.
I ain't having no last meal.
Well, you have to have a last meal.
It's tradition.
See, I'm wondering if maybe I should have something I really love, or maybe it'd be better to have something I've never tried before.
You can have whatever you want and mine, too.
I ain't having no last meal.
Oh, then you realize, of course, that the last meal you had will end up being your last meal.
He's got a point there, B.
A.
Instead of agreeing with him, Hannibal, you're supposed to be coming up with a plan that don't include us to have a last meal.
I'm working on it.
Good.
But you might give some thought to an appetizer.
Might I suggest the Dover sole with lemon butter and capers? Marie Antoinette swore by it.
I don't believe it.
You are forgiven.
We haven't got much time.
Put your hands away from your body and don't move.
Then how do I get my hands away from my body? Seven days a week, 365 days No, I don't profess to be a psychiatrist.
And if you don't get through, that just means that you won't get the opportunity to try I'll send him ashore right away.
without any obligation whatsoever to anybody else Let's go, Mr.
Murdock.
You're going back to the VA hospital.
How did you know that Father Stellini was no longer inhabiting this itty-bitty body? Because, luckily, the cleaning lady forgot her glasses and returned to the rectory to find Father Stellini in the bathroom where you locked him with a neat little bump on his noggin.
I believe it was right here.
See, it was right here.
I believe The launch has arrived, sir, with Father Stellini.
Fine.
That shouldn't take more than an hour.
Murdock can go back in the same boat.
I understand you are a troubled man.
I forgive you.
Oh, Father Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Yes, it's all right, my son.
Sergeant, take Father Stellini to the prisoners.
Bless you.
Let him stay with him.
Bless you.
Bless you.
Captain Underwood told me to stay with you.
These men are very sharp.
Obviously not that sharp, or you and I wouldn't have jobs this morning.
Just a little black humor.
What happened to Murdock? He's back there shuffling a half deck for those guys.
He figured they'd be on the lookout for some kind of move, so we threw Murdock at them so they wouldn't pay attention to me.
Murdock figured no one looks for the old double frammus.
It's a movie blood packet.
Now, you can't mess with protection under there, so when it goes off it may burn a little, so bite your tongue after you swallow this.
But don't do that until just before they fire.
Frankie, even if this doesn't work, thanks.
Save it.
It'll work, my son.
Good morning, Padre.
How you doing? As well as one can under the circumstances.
Are these the instruments to be used? Yeah, they have to be loaded.
The men don't load their own weapons? Not for an execution.
You see, not all the rounds are live.
So no one actually knows who does or does not fire the killing shots.
How humane.
Sergeant, do you have an extra smoke? Oh, sure, Padre.
All I have is these cancer sticks without filters, but I figure if you gotta go for it, then why not go with gusto? Ain't it the truth? Damn.
Sorry, I mean Oh, that's all right.
We're all a little nervous this morning.
I have more matches.
I'll be right back.
Gil should have some.
Have you seen Father Stellini? Yes, sir, he's in here with me.
Well, let's get in gear, Sergeant.
We're not running a tour service, we're executing the prisoners this morning.
Yes, sir.
I was looking for some matches for the Father.
Father, your light.
Oh, yes.
Of course, right.
Time to be going, Father.
I don't wish to run behind.
I'm sure the prisoners wouldn't mind if you did.
Bless you.
Did you make the switch okay? What'll sound better, "I think" or "I hope"? Pursuant to the findings of the general court-martial convened at Fort Owen, California on 18 August, 1986, and having been found guilty of the charge of murder and all specifications thereto, and having been approved by the Convening Authority, the sentence of death by firing squad to be imposed on John Smith, Colonel, US Army, Templeton Peck, First Lieutenant, US Army and B.
A.
Baracus, Sergeant, US Army, is hereby ordered to take place at the United States Army Correctional Facility at Barrier Island, California.
Present! Aim! Fire! Respiration and heartbeat are stabilized.
They're actually starting to come to.
Just like I dreamed it would be.
Welcome, Lieutenant.
Oh, no.
They sent me downstairs, didn't they? Don't be alarmed about your disorientation.
It's just the side effects from the drug that you swallowed and having your respiratory system depressed.
Ah.
B.
A.
, B.
A.
, B.
A.
It's good to see you here.
Murdock, I never thought I'd be glad to see you.
Hannibal.
All right, Captain.
It's good to see you.
You handsome devil, you.
Oh, no, that's all right, that's all right.
Looking good, kid.
So are you.
Didn't gain any weight, huh? Shall we, gentlemen? I'm sure you're interested in seeing your new home, settling in.
And where is that? How would the rolling green landscape of Virginia sound? Virgin As in CIA? I believe certain portions of the intelligence and espionage community are located there, but it's also centrally located for me and my schedule.
Virginia? That's so far away.
B.
A.
and I, we just got back together.
Maybe you and I, we can get out and visit them sometime.
I'm gonna miss you guys.
Why should you do that? You're joining us, Mr.
Santana.
Who me? No, no, no.
I got three studios offering me jobs this week alone.
I gotta get back in the mainstream.
Well, I don't think that's wise, considering you're now on the 10 most wanted list.
What? Well, you aided and abetted three convicted murderers in their escape.
Well, that was the whole beauty of the plan.
They're not escaped.
They're dead.
Their bodies are gonna be buried at Forest Lawn.
Right? Right? Say I'm right.
I'm right, right? That's just a story we used to pick up the bodies, and there are no official papers.
And as soon as they find that the bodies are missing from the morgue, someone is going to realize that this is just another of those wildly improbable A- Team escapes, with the assistance of a pseudo-priest.
Played with high style, I might add.
I never bargained for this.
Hey, I cannot go on the lam.
I got a beautiful home, career, family, neighbors.
Your career is on the skids, Santana.
But because of your help, we're going to take care of your father's medical needs, et cetera.
It'll just be for a little while, Frankie.
Yeah.
Shall we? We can take my limo to the plane.
Not me.
I don't fly.
Well, I'm sure we can work something out.
Gentlemen, let's adjourn for a toast while we discuss B.
A.
's alternative travel arrangements.
Carla, return the vehicles and take care of that other little matter.
Okay, tell me about the light.
I don't wanna hear it, Murdock! I ain't see no light! There has to be a light.
There's always a light.
There are thousands of documented cases of a tunnel and a light.
And you are one of the few who have been there and come back.
I ain't been nowhere.
I wasn't dead.
I mean, to have returned to the living after having been touched by the light.
You're the one who's touched, fool! You promised never to call me that again.
Did not! Did, too.
Crossed your heart, hoped to die.
How could you know about that? You can't know about that.
You know, General, you could've let B.
A.
sleep a little longer.
It's not that bad, Frank.
I mean Look, we've been on the wanted list for 10 years.
Believe me, hasn't been all that bad.
You were almost executed.
Yeah, well.
I mean, you have your good days and your bad days.
Try this tranquilizer gun on B.
A.
There are some side effects, but a good deal gentler than some of your past methods.
Now, as soon as Carla returns, we can get started.
Gentlemen, shall we make use of my very well stocked bar? Why would I drink with you? Oh, come, Colonel Smith.
Hannibal.
We're going to work together.
I should make things as pleasant as possible.
I can be very accommodating if you do things my way.
You've been very accommodating all along, Stockwell.
To yourself.
This entire nightmare is a result of you sending us after a certain man.
Curtis.
Who conveniently fingered us for the murder.
And being the prime witness in the case could have cleared us, except somebody murdered him.
Did you want me to explain? I'm waiting for something.
Oh.
Well, my best guess scenario is that your Captain Josh Curtis murdered Morrison.
Why? Well, perhaps he was already involved in gun-running and the black market in Vietnam.
Morrison found out, had to be disposed of.
Now, as for Curtis, as you remember when you pulled him off that hijacked plane in Spain, he was on his way to making an arms shipment right here in California.
But with him on that plane was a major buyer and a middleman, Ramon Soulay.
Now as soon as he found out that Curtis was arrested and going to turn evidence, he had to protect himself.
But by that time, Curtis had already given him enough information.
As a matter of fact, in just three hours, Soulay is going to be completing his business right here at the Saddleback Ranch.
That's the operation that Carla is setting up right now.
That explains everything from your point of view.
Check him out, Face, make sure he's unconscious.
That guy's too tricky.
What? What are you doing? It all makes sense, if Soulay killed Curtis.
You think Stockwell could've done it? Only Soulay knows for sure.
As soon as he talks to us, I'll feel a lot better about this whole thing.
Wait, wait, wait.
You mean, we're going after these, like, super dangerous, desperate, possible murderous gunrunners? We don't have to.
I mean, we could let Stockwell's men do it.
You can stay here if you want.
Yeah, well, I may just do that, you know.
Not that I don't love you guys.
I mean, I think I proved that.
But, I don't wanna upset the man, you know.
I mean, I could use that pardon, capisce? It's all there.
Well, what's new, Ramon? You're the A-Team.
You're the A-Team.
Yeah, that's us, the A-Team.
Scary, ain't it? We heard you killed Josh Curtis, is that right? Well, I I'll tell you what.
You got until I light my cigar to answer.
Yeah, Curtis.
Curtis You kill him? Yeah.
Yeah, I killed him.
I killed him.
Amazing how Stockwell's men are nowhere to be found, isn't it? Maybe we're Stockwell's men.
You're the A-Team.
I read you were killed.
You were killed this morning.
Well, we're back.
Well, I thought you gentlemen would be much more enamored of your surroundings.
Well, it's not the accommodations, General, it's the decor.
One-way mirrors, hidden cameras, listening devices.
The joint is loaded.
Well, since we have a deal and you're not going anyplace, what do you care if I take care of my investment? Well, there's a kind of bass-ackwards logic there.
What about principle? Yeah, what about it? Yeah, man.
We don't like this place.
It's just like jail.
Oh, I wouldn't say that.
Well, I have to agree with him there.
Hmm? This is the truth of it.
Listen, I'll probably be getting some time off for good behavior and, well, just so General Stockwell there has me constantly under close watch, I thought perhaps you should personally oversee my checking out the local dining and dancing facilities.
You know what I mean? I'm sure something can be worked out.
Ah, yes.
This is Able Nine.
Mr.
Peck would like to be driven through town.
Uh You don't really think you can keep us here, do you? Your security is nothing but holes.
Holes? Such as? Wait and see.
I'm sure in time you'll see it's better if you do things If you do it my way.
He does, he's got a sense of humor.
Well, which one of you got the address of this place out to Captain Murdock? Oh, did he send you a postcard? Not quite.
Hi, guys.
Hey, Murdock.
What do you say? Captain Murdock! You wanna give us a kiss, B.
A.
? How long are you out for, man? Oh, as long as I want.
I'm officially released.
What? I'm no longer insane.
I got my papers and everything.
The board reviewed my case and they released me.
That hospital did a terrific job.
They cured me of all my psychiatric ills.
After more than a decade? Well, the road to hope is often pockmarked.
So are you.
I may be glad to see you, but you're still crazy.
Hey, you can bunk here in me.
No, that's not the way it works, Frankie.
This is not a college dorm.
That's all right, guys.
Really, thanks a lot.
But I got my own place, I've got my own pad.
I even I even got a job.
Now, I gotta get out there and pay the old rent and put the butter on the old biscuits.
What kind of job? Working for the pound.
I'm scooping up stray dogs that don't have a place to hang their collar at night and everything.
Cute as a devil.
I've got a bunch of them right out front.
You wanna see? You wanna see? Nice, Murdock, nice.
Yeah.
Holes in security.
Indeed.
Colonel John Smith, Lieutenant Templeton Peck and Sergeant B.
A.
Baracus, found guilty on all counts.
All that remains is for their execution to be administered.
Perfect.
Parade, halt! Right face! Ready! Any last requests? My favorite year.
Present! Hey, hey.
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
I didn't even get to drink it.
Aim! Oh, wait.
Come on.
Come on, what's the point of a last request if you don't get it? I didn't even get her phone number.
No, no, no.
Hannibal! See you in the swamp, Lieutenant.
Fire! How'd you sleep? Like I didn't have a care in the world.
Patient's escaped! How could he? Oh, he was so upset about his friends, I even had him put in restraints.
What's up, Doc? Able Four to Empress One.
The fox is in the henhouse.
Freeze! You have illegally broken and entered this domicile which is actually a covert CIA operation.
For security reasons you are to empty the contents of your pockets on the floor and back out of the apartment Murdock! What are you doing here, huh? Where you been? You know, I like your doorbell setup.
You really expect people to fall for that? Most people do.
And what is this with "empty your pockets"? I mean, what're you doing? Shaking down guys as they're breaking into your apartment? Well, you see, I always got to replace that door molding, you know.
You take a shot like that, breaking into someone's abode, you get what you get.
I've been to the hospital three times looking for you.
Where you been? Well, I figured that there was somebody else looking for me besides you.
You ain't talking without substance.
You know, that guy Stockwell's people been calling here and asking for you.
I got to help my guys.
And I figure I only got about 12 hours, and I'm not gonna be able to do it alone.
Let me guess who you got in mind? You could say no.
But you won't like it.
No.
But I'd understand.
Hey, you and me, we're invincible.
Together, we can handle anything.
All right? Thanks.
Come on.
Freeze! Just about.
Ain't it the truth? Okay, sport, welcome to the barrio.
Mrs.
Manicotti, open up! Yo, Mrs.
Man Going down? I told them how to fix this just last week.
Able Four and Able Six should've been back by now.
Maybe they're still trying to contain the matter or just stopped off for a call of nature.
Then they don't belong in my unit.
We're sorry.
Really, we really are.
We didn't mean to interrupt.
And don't be concerned.
His partner will check in as soon as he checks out of county emergency.
Very good, Captain.
You managed to evade and then apprehend two class eight operatives in spite of your craziness.
Or perhaps because of it.
Well, how do you do? Frankie Santana, we've met once before, at your service and available for dinner Tuesdays and Thursdays.
What brings you here, Captain? Certainly not my men.
Why come of your own accord? Because I don't like wearing somebody else's straitjacket.
Besides, we have something in common.
We both want the A-Team alive and well.
Why would I want that? You know, all of my psychiatric training has taught me that why you want the A-Team alive and well is unimportant.
The important thing is you want the A-Team alive and well, which means if they're dead, they're no good.
Now, you allowed them to go out there in front of that jury, knowing full well that they were gonna be convicted.
And you sent them after Curtis knowing full well he was gonna put them right at the scene of Morrison's murder.
Now, you have very neatly and specifically lined us up and then We've all fallen into place exactly where we are.
Whoever judged you insane, Captain, should have his license lifted.
You are going to help me spring my friends.
Barrier Island, about 30 miles off the California coast.
It was once a US military installation, not unlike San Clemente.
The land is basically rock and shrub, no indications of soft terrain or soil.
Looks like somebody did a pretty good job at researching this stuff.
There is a reef on the northern shore and there is no actual beach or natural landing facilities except for a manmade wooden piling, here.
The execution that is scheduled for tomorrow at 8:00 a.
m.
will take place here.
The firing squad, led by Captain Underwood and consisting of eight sharpshooters, will be positioned here.
The prisoners are kept in a large single cell.
The only access is through this doorway.
The barracks have been reinforced with corrugated steel.
The only vessels that are permitted to approach the island must first be announced by radio from Fort Owen.
Any and all other vessels will be warned and fired upon if they attempt to land.
As you can see, Captain, escape, or rather, rescue is virtually impossible.
They'll be expecting you.
But not you.
I would say not.
Since, to them, I do not exist.
No, no, no, I'm gonna need you to pull some strings.
You're gonna have to help.
I just gave it to you.
Don't get greedy.
I'm not beyond doing anything that's necessary to accomplish this.
Don't underestimate me, Stockwell.
I obviously wouldn't.
Drop your arms and move away from them, or I shall release a fine gas into your part of the cabin.
He's bluffing.
He's bluffing.
I'm telling you, he's bluffing.
You think he's bluffing? No.
Me, either.
I never bluff, Mr.
Santana.
I never need to.
Knockout gas, right? Not poisonous.
I mean, we didn't do, like, stuff that deserves poisonous gas.
I mean, we did, like, knockout-gas kind of stuff.
Right? Take care of their removal.
And contact Captain Underwood.
Tell him I'm going to talk to the prisoners in two hours.
All of them? Yes.
I've no doubt that Colonel Smith is already planning his escape.
And if he should be successful, well, that wouldn't do at all, would it? Hello? Frankie? Where are we? Forget us, where are my pants? I got mine on.
Are my pants out there? I got Hey, there's a bum.
He's got my pants.
Hey, you come back here.
Get over here.
I am not putting these on.
We can't screw around.
The guys are gonna be facing the firing squad this morning in about My watch! That bum, he stole my watch! Oh, gee.
See, now, I have compassion for a fellow robbee.
That's all right.
I took this from Stockwell's folder.
Wait a minute, you filched that? Yeah.
This is a list of everybody who has clearance on the island.
Do you think it'll help? It'll help.
Where's Smith? Smith? Where is he? Oh, he moved to better accommodations.
Where's my sweet roll? Hurry up, Face.
Give me a break, B.
A.
, will you? It took me all night to turn this spoon into a lock pick.
I know I can do this.
Give me a couple more minutes here and We haven't got a couple of minutes, Face.
Face, B.
A.
, come on! Come on! Hannibal! Hannibal, how's that plan coming along for getting us out of here, huh? I'm still working out some kicks.
Hannibal! I can't go get what we need looking like this.
I gotta go home and change.
Home, home.
You can't go home.
Stockwell's gonna have men there.
Why would he let us go just to pick us up again? I don't know why this guy's done anything that he's done, but we gotta minimize our risks.
We're gonna bust the most notorious convicts out of a hyper-security installation.
How much more risk can there be? You know, you better get a move on.
We got less than two hours, Frankie.
All right.
If I'm a little late, it's 'cause I stopped off for a quick bottle of Sterno.
Bless me, Father, for I am about to sin.
We don't want any.
Man, what you want? We ain't got nothing to say to you.
I have a proposition for you.
The way other investments that he's suggested have turned out, how could we refuse? Colonel, it wouldn't hurt to listen.
Get out of here.
You make fewer mistakes than anyone I've ever come across with the exception of myself.
Don't make one at this stage of the game.
We're finished with unending manipulation.
It ends here, Colonel.
There's no place else to go.
That's why I have a final offer.
And it's good.
You know it's good, because what else have I to gain? You want us to join the outfit? I haven't spent so much time watching you to try to force three very square pegs into tiny round holes.
You don't join anybody, and nobody joins you.
What I'm offering is an alliance.
You and me.
The bottom line is now that you'll be higher on the wanted list than before.
You won't be sought for some embarrassing incident during the war.
You are convicted murderers now.
A manhunt, as you knew it, will be increased to the tenth power.
You can't escape that kind of concentrated effort, and I don't doubt that you will be in a shot-on-sight status.
But I can offer you an out.
I'm a little old to change profession, Stockwell.
Just a limited partnership.
I'd say a certain number of missions specified, somewhat marginal occupations, and for this, you'll be given a full pardon.
Wait a minute.
A full pardon? As in Presidential pardon? I'm sure I know someone who can reach the right people or person.
A specified number of missions and we're totally cleared.
We don't work for you or the government anymore.
By then, you can work for the local McDonald's for all I care.
But make no mistake.
These missions are obviously nothing I can give to standard operatives.
You must realize the possible consequences.
Suicide missions? Not all.
There you go.
"Not all.
" Well, yeah, it sounds terrific.
Hey, man, why should we trust you? Because I give you my word.
I've not done that till now.
And like you, Colonel, I do believe in some kind of honor to make it all right.
Even if it is our own particular brand.
How long do we have to let you know? I mean, before you get us out? Colonel, that's not part of the deal.
I can't get you out.
Say what? Wait a minute.
What do you mean you can't get us out of here? Well, I could not assist three federal prisoners, convicted of murder, in escaping.
Contact me upon your successful evasion of your current situation.
Then we have a deal.
But you must escape on your own.
Guard! Oh, how the hell are we gonna escape on our own? We got one whole card left.
Murdock.
Murdock! Murdock.
Ready! Aim! Come on, B.
A.
, let's go! Wait for me! Wait for me, Murdock! Wait for me! You promise to be my bestest buddy in the whole world? I promise! And never, never call me fool again? Never again! Cross my heart and hope to die! And to get a pilot's license and to share my apartment with me? No! No! Come on, two swinging singles sharing a giant-screen TV! Shoot! Shoot! Shoot! Shoot.
If Murdock gets us out of this, as far as I'm concerned, he can have anything he wants as long as I live.
I don't know.
I gotta think about this.
That's the launch arriving now.
Had to pick someone else up.
This must be visitors' day, Captain.
Father Stellini to administer last rites and offer absolution.
B.
A.
, what are you gonna have for your last meal? What? Your last meal.
See, I'm trying to figure out what I'm gonna have, and I thought Man, you're crazy.
You staring to sound just like Murdock.
I ain't having no last meal.
Well, you have to have a last meal.
It's tradition.
See, I'm wondering if maybe I should have something I really love, or maybe it'd be better to have something I've never tried before.
You can have whatever you want and mine, too.
I ain't having no last meal.
Oh, then you realize, of course, that the last meal you had will end up being your last meal.
He's got a point there, B.
A.
Instead of agreeing with him, Hannibal, you're supposed to be coming up with a plan that don't include us to have a last meal.
I'm working on it.
Good.
But you might give some thought to an appetizer.
Might I suggest the Dover sole with lemon butter and capers? Marie Antoinette swore by it.
I don't believe it.
You are forgiven.
We haven't got much time.
Put your hands away from your body and don't move.
Then how do I get my hands away from my body? Seven days a week, 365 days No, I don't profess to be a psychiatrist.
And if you don't get through, that just means that you won't get the opportunity to try I'll send him ashore right away.
without any obligation whatsoever to anybody else Let's go, Mr.
Murdock.
You're going back to the VA hospital.
How did you know that Father Stellini was no longer inhabiting this itty-bitty body? Because, luckily, the cleaning lady forgot her glasses and returned to the rectory to find Father Stellini in the bathroom where you locked him with a neat little bump on his noggin.
I believe it was right here.
See, it was right here.
I believe The launch has arrived, sir, with Father Stellini.
Fine.
That shouldn't take more than an hour.
Murdock can go back in the same boat.
I understand you are a troubled man.
I forgive you.
Oh, Father Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Yes, it's all right, my son.
Sergeant, take Father Stellini to the prisoners.
Bless you.
Let him stay with him.
Bless you.
Bless you.
Captain Underwood told me to stay with you.
These men are very sharp.
Obviously not that sharp, or you and I wouldn't have jobs this morning.
Just a little black humor.
What happened to Murdock? He's back there shuffling a half deck for those guys.
He figured they'd be on the lookout for some kind of move, so we threw Murdock at them so they wouldn't pay attention to me.
Murdock figured no one looks for the old double frammus.
It's a movie blood packet.
Now, you can't mess with protection under there, so when it goes off it may burn a little, so bite your tongue after you swallow this.
But don't do that until just before they fire.
Frankie, even if this doesn't work, thanks.
Save it.
It'll work, my son.
Good morning, Padre.
How you doing? As well as one can under the circumstances.
Are these the instruments to be used? Yeah, they have to be loaded.
The men don't load their own weapons? Not for an execution.
You see, not all the rounds are live.
So no one actually knows who does or does not fire the killing shots.
How humane.
Sergeant, do you have an extra smoke? Oh, sure, Padre.
All I have is these cancer sticks without filters, but I figure if you gotta go for it, then why not go with gusto? Ain't it the truth? Damn.
Sorry, I mean Oh, that's all right.
We're all a little nervous this morning.
I have more matches.
I'll be right back.
Gil should have some.
Have you seen Father Stellini? Yes, sir, he's in here with me.
Well, let's get in gear, Sergeant.
We're not running a tour service, we're executing the prisoners this morning.
Yes, sir.
I was looking for some matches for the Father.
Father, your light.
Oh, yes.
Of course, right.
Time to be going, Father.
I don't wish to run behind.
I'm sure the prisoners wouldn't mind if you did.
Bless you.
Did you make the switch okay? What'll sound better, "I think" or "I hope"? Pursuant to the findings of the general court-martial convened at Fort Owen, California on 18 August, 1986, and having been found guilty of the charge of murder and all specifications thereto, and having been approved by the Convening Authority, the sentence of death by firing squad to be imposed on John Smith, Colonel, US Army, Templeton Peck, First Lieutenant, US Army and B.
A.
Baracus, Sergeant, US Army, is hereby ordered to take place at the United States Army Correctional Facility at Barrier Island, California.
Present! Aim! Fire! Respiration and heartbeat are stabilized.
They're actually starting to come to.
Just like I dreamed it would be.
Welcome, Lieutenant.
Oh, no.
They sent me downstairs, didn't they? Don't be alarmed about your disorientation.
It's just the side effects from the drug that you swallowed and having your respiratory system depressed.
Ah.
B.
A.
, B.
A.
, B.
A.
It's good to see you here.
Murdock, I never thought I'd be glad to see you.
Hannibal.
All right, Captain.
It's good to see you.
You handsome devil, you.
Oh, no, that's all right, that's all right.
Looking good, kid.
So are you.
Didn't gain any weight, huh? Shall we, gentlemen? I'm sure you're interested in seeing your new home, settling in.
And where is that? How would the rolling green landscape of Virginia sound? Virgin As in CIA? I believe certain portions of the intelligence and espionage community are located there, but it's also centrally located for me and my schedule.
Virginia? That's so far away.
B.
A.
and I, we just got back together.
Maybe you and I, we can get out and visit them sometime.
I'm gonna miss you guys.
Why should you do that? You're joining us, Mr.
Santana.
Who me? No, no, no.
I got three studios offering me jobs this week alone.
I gotta get back in the mainstream.
Well, I don't think that's wise, considering you're now on the 10 most wanted list.
What? Well, you aided and abetted three convicted murderers in their escape.
Well, that was the whole beauty of the plan.
They're not escaped.
They're dead.
Their bodies are gonna be buried at Forest Lawn.
Right? Right? Say I'm right.
I'm right, right? That's just a story we used to pick up the bodies, and there are no official papers.
And as soon as they find that the bodies are missing from the morgue, someone is going to realize that this is just another of those wildly improbable A- Team escapes, with the assistance of a pseudo-priest.
Played with high style, I might add.
I never bargained for this.
Hey, I cannot go on the lam.
I got a beautiful home, career, family, neighbors.
Your career is on the skids, Santana.
But because of your help, we're going to take care of your father's medical needs, et cetera.
It'll just be for a little while, Frankie.
Yeah.
Shall we? We can take my limo to the plane.
Not me.
I don't fly.
Well, I'm sure we can work something out.
Gentlemen, let's adjourn for a toast while we discuss B.
A.
's alternative travel arrangements.
Carla, return the vehicles and take care of that other little matter.
Okay, tell me about the light.
I don't wanna hear it, Murdock! I ain't see no light! There has to be a light.
There's always a light.
There are thousands of documented cases of a tunnel and a light.
And you are one of the few who have been there and come back.
I ain't been nowhere.
I wasn't dead.
I mean, to have returned to the living after having been touched by the light.
You're the one who's touched, fool! You promised never to call me that again.
Did not! Did, too.
Crossed your heart, hoped to die.
How could you know about that? You can't know about that.
You know, General, you could've let B.
A.
sleep a little longer.
It's not that bad, Frank.
I mean Look, we've been on the wanted list for 10 years.
Believe me, hasn't been all that bad.
You were almost executed.
Yeah, well.
I mean, you have your good days and your bad days.
Try this tranquilizer gun on B.
A.
There are some side effects, but a good deal gentler than some of your past methods.
Now, as soon as Carla returns, we can get started.
Gentlemen, shall we make use of my very well stocked bar? Why would I drink with you? Oh, come, Colonel Smith.
Hannibal.
We're going to work together.
I should make things as pleasant as possible.
I can be very accommodating if you do things my way.
You've been very accommodating all along, Stockwell.
To yourself.
This entire nightmare is a result of you sending us after a certain man.
Curtis.
Who conveniently fingered us for the murder.
And being the prime witness in the case could have cleared us, except somebody murdered him.
Did you want me to explain? I'm waiting for something.
Oh.
Well, my best guess scenario is that your Captain Josh Curtis murdered Morrison.
Why? Well, perhaps he was already involved in gun-running and the black market in Vietnam.
Morrison found out, had to be disposed of.
Now, as for Curtis, as you remember when you pulled him off that hijacked plane in Spain, he was on his way to making an arms shipment right here in California.
But with him on that plane was a major buyer and a middleman, Ramon Soulay.
Now as soon as he found out that Curtis was arrested and going to turn evidence, he had to protect himself.
But by that time, Curtis had already given him enough information.
As a matter of fact, in just three hours, Soulay is going to be completing his business right here at the Saddleback Ranch.
That's the operation that Carla is setting up right now.
That explains everything from your point of view.
Check him out, Face, make sure he's unconscious.
That guy's too tricky.
What? What are you doing? It all makes sense, if Soulay killed Curtis.
You think Stockwell could've done it? Only Soulay knows for sure.
As soon as he talks to us, I'll feel a lot better about this whole thing.
Wait, wait, wait.
You mean, we're going after these, like, super dangerous, desperate, possible murderous gunrunners? We don't have to.
I mean, we could let Stockwell's men do it.
You can stay here if you want.
Yeah, well, I may just do that, you know.
Not that I don't love you guys.
I mean, I think I proved that.
But, I don't wanna upset the man, you know.
I mean, I could use that pardon, capisce? It's all there.
Well, what's new, Ramon? You're the A-Team.
You're the A-Team.
Yeah, that's us, the A-Team.
Scary, ain't it? We heard you killed Josh Curtis, is that right? Well, I I'll tell you what.
You got until I light my cigar to answer.
Yeah, Curtis.
Curtis You kill him? Yeah.
Yeah, I killed him.
I killed him.
Amazing how Stockwell's men are nowhere to be found, isn't it? Maybe we're Stockwell's men.
You're the A-Team.
I read you were killed.
You were killed this morning.
Well, we're back.
Well, I thought you gentlemen would be much more enamored of your surroundings.
Well, it's not the accommodations, General, it's the decor.
One-way mirrors, hidden cameras, listening devices.
The joint is loaded.
Well, since we have a deal and you're not going anyplace, what do you care if I take care of my investment? Well, there's a kind of bass-ackwards logic there.
What about principle? Yeah, what about it? Yeah, man.
We don't like this place.
It's just like jail.
Oh, I wouldn't say that.
Well, I have to agree with him there.
Hmm? This is the truth of it.
Listen, I'll probably be getting some time off for good behavior and, well, just so General Stockwell there has me constantly under close watch, I thought perhaps you should personally oversee my checking out the local dining and dancing facilities.
You know what I mean? I'm sure something can be worked out.
Ah, yes.
This is Able Nine.
Mr.
Peck would like to be driven through town.
Uh You don't really think you can keep us here, do you? Your security is nothing but holes.
Holes? Such as? Wait and see.
I'm sure in time you'll see it's better if you do things If you do it my way.
He does, he's got a sense of humor.
Well, which one of you got the address of this place out to Captain Murdock? Oh, did he send you a postcard? Not quite.
Hi, guys.
Hey, Murdock.
What do you say? Captain Murdock! You wanna give us a kiss, B.
A.
? How long are you out for, man? Oh, as long as I want.
I'm officially released.
What? I'm no longer insane.
I got my papers and everything.
The board reviewed my case and they released me.
That hospital did a terrific job.
They cured me of all my psychiatric ills.
After more than a decade? Well, the road to hope is often pockmarked.
So are you.
I may be glad to see you, but you're still crazy.
Hey, you can bunk here in me.
No, that's not the way it works, Frankie.
This is not a college dorm.
That's all right, guys.
Really, thanks a lot.
But I got my own place, I've got my own pad.
I even I even got a job.
Now, I gotta get out there and pay the old rent and put the butter on the old biscuits.
What kind of job? Working for the pound.
I'm scooping up stray dogs that don't have a place to hang their collar at night and everything.
Cute as a devil.
I've got a bunch of them right out front.
You wanna see? You wanna see? Nice, Murdock, nice.
Yeah.
Holes in security.
Indeed.