The Croods: Family Tree (2021) s05e03 Episode Script

-[screams, grunts]
-[snarling]
[Ugga grunting]
[sniffs]
-[gasps] Wow, Ugga!
You're tearing through
those tartichokes.
You've got some real
tarti-chops.
Glad I invited you to help me.
-Well, like you said,
it was do this
or never eat again, so
-Works every time.
It's actually how I got
Phil to propose.
-Oh, sounds romantic. So,
why do you
So, why do you love
these things so much?
-The first bite is sour,
but then it gets really sweet.
I just connect with them.
-Hard to imagine why.
-[gasps] Ah! Grug.
-Did you eat my tartichokes?
-[chewing, swallows]
-What? No! Why would
you even think that?
Yes. I ate them all!
Why are they so sour?!
-Hope, maybe you
should go harvest
somewhere with fewer Grugs.
-Good call.
-Mm-hmm!
Doesn't seem like you're
having a lot of luck here.
[Hope growls]
[Grug sighs]
How much longer
are we gonna be here?
-Until our baskets are full.
-But that's gonna take forever!
[chomps, chews, burps] Oh
-With you doing that? Yes.
So, why don't you
go do anything but this?
-Can I go do anything butthis?
-Yes. I just said that.
-Woo!
-[Ugga sighs]
-[Grug panting]
-Hey, hey!
[panting, grunting]
[groans]
-Come to Mama
[grunts] Mama's falling. Ah! Ah!
Mama's falling!
[Grug grunts]
[gasps]
[both strain]
[gasping]
Grug! You saved my life!
-Uh, yeah. Yeah, that's
why I'm here.
Not to eat your tartichokes,
that's for sure. [quiet laugh]
-Wait, what happened
to my tartichoke?
[gulp]
-[mouth full]
What tartichoke?
- Let's live wild, the
world's our own
We built this wheel
now it's gunna roll
You know a spark
becomes a fire wherever we go
Whoa-ho-ho
Stuck together,
stuck, stuck together
It's an evolution
for worse or for better
To find some unity
For all humanity
Because we're
stuck together
In one big family tree
-Mm Rock, leaf, sharp rock!
-Rock, leaf, sharp rock!
-GRUG: Rock!
-EEP: Leaf!
And leaf
beats rock again,
which means I beat you. Again.
-Gah! Why is this
game so hard?!
-Cake break!
-And why am I not
already eating that cake?
-Sorry, Dawn.
This cake is just for Grug
because he saved my life.
-Aw, you really didn't
have to do this, Hope.
But since you did
-So, if I save your life,
I get my own cake?
-Not just cake.
Because Grug saved my life,
-I'm beholden to him.
-Good to know.
-And I be holdin' this cake
in my belly!
-No! Grug, "beholden"
means I owe you.
-You see, Grug? On this farm,
we believe in returning favors.
You know, you scratch my back,
I scratch yours.
-In my day, we didn't
scratch backs!
It was an eye for an eye,
tooth for a tooth!
So if any of you skin-bags
need an eye or a tooth,
you know where to find me!
-Anyway, I mean every
kind of action
must be met with a corresponding
reaction.
For instance,
if Dawn were to clear my plate,
I would be obliged to
return the favor
with a kindness of equal value
to make things even.
It's called "the even-ing."
-The evening? So it's
a night thing?
-No, not evening. Even-ing!
-Yeah. Night.
-Moving on. It's a Betterman
tradition.
Of course,
Hope's dedication
to this tradition
is a bit more exhaustive.
-You don't have
to do this, Hope.
I saved your life 'cause
that's what Croods do.
-And this is what Bettermans do.
Now, eat up!
-Oh, I-I couldn't. Really.
Hm
[contented sighing]
-Ah!
-[jingling]
-I thought these wind chimes
might help you relax!
-Oh. Um, great. Thanks.
-[snore]
-Chimes
-Are you asleep?
-I was until you woke me up.
-Sorry. I'll get more chimes.
[sighs, mumbles]
-Are you asleep now?
-Ah!
You can see my eyes
are open, right?
-Oops! More chimes coming up!
-No, I don't need
[sighs] Forget it. Forget it.
-[loud chiming]
-Ah! [grunting]
-Good nap?
-[Grug groans]
[Chunky growling]
[quiet squawking]
-Can you believe it, Chunky?
A uneelgle,
the rarest and most easily
frightened of all the eelgles.
[growls]
-Lemon drink, anyone?!
-Ah!
-[shriek]
-Aw!
-[gasps] Was that a uneelgle?
You never see those!
Why didn't you catch it?
[Grug growls]
-[Chunky snarls]
-[Grug grunts]
-Okay. I just need
a little entrance over here,
touch of moss over
there, and done!
[laughs] Oh, you're a
drafty little guy,
aren't you, Dampy?
Took me forever,
but my mini-cave collection
is finally complete.
[sighs] Time for a cake break.
[singing to himself]
[singing to himself]
Aah! My mini-caves.
-Oh. Hi, Grug.
I washed all your dirty rocks.
You're welcome.
[gasps]
-[echoing]
Dampy!
Why won't Hope leave me alone?
-Sure. Having someone
waiting on you
hand and foot is rough.
-You don't get it.
Hope follows me everywhere.
She never stops.
She's like a duck-cricket.
[quacking, chirping]
-You're being dramatic.
She's not here now,
-is she?
-Ah!
-Grug, can I sing
you a lullaby?
-Why? I'm not trying to sleep!
I'm standing up!
[singing to lullaby melody]
Close your eyes, giant man.
-Dream of meat sticks
and grunting
[gasping, groans]
[snoring]
Good night!
[panting]
Boop! Pillow?
-Ah!
[growls]
[grunting, yelling]
-Why are you hitting
Grug's pelt?
Especially when he's not in it.
[grunts]
-I'm cleaning it, Phil!
Or I'm trying to,
but I think
it's more dust than pelt.
Anyway, Grug saved my life,
and I'm gonna
even things up if it kills me.
-[grunting, panting]
-Hope, Grug absolved you.
You owe him nothing.
-You know that's not
how our system works, Phil.
We always return favors.
[sighs]
-Perhaps we should rethink
"the even-ing."
-You mean because "the even-ing"
also means night?
-Not the name. The system.
The name is flawless!
-Phil, we can't change
the system!
If we forgo rules and order,
society will collapse.
We might as well just
live in caves and wear pelts.
Pelts! [grunting]
Will! [grunts] Never! [grunts]
Be! [grunts] Clean!
[grunting, panting]
So I guess I'll just have
to keep doing favors for Grug
until things are even
again. [sighs]
Uh [gasps]
-Phil?! Ah!
-Better idea!
-Phil!
-Grug saved your life,
so you must save Grug's life.
It's the only way to return
the favor in full.
-Yes! You're right!
And then Grug
can clean his own pelt!
-Or not clean it, I guess.
-Yes!
It will be a perfect even-ing.
-We're doing this at night?
-Not evening! Even-ing!
-Not hearing the difference.
And finish that pelt for me.
-Thanks.
-[shudders]
Aah! [coughing]
-Where's the pelt? Where am I?!
Ugh Grug dust.
-Hm
-Mm
Mm!
-GRUG/THUNK: Yes!
-What's going on in here?
-We're making history, Hope,
and you've got a front row seat.
-If I catch one more bug nugget,
it'll be a new record.
Whoa!
-[echoing]
You must save Grug's life
-Okay, Thunk. Nugget me. Ah
-Go bug or go home! [grunts]
-I got it! I got it! Ah
[slow motion]
Ah
[grunts, screaming]
-Yeah!
-Yeah!
We're the champions of
whatever this is.
BOTH: Yes!
-Congratulations.
-Okay, Sandy, let's check out
your aim game.
When I throw this target
in the air,
-you spear it.
-[growling]
But, wait for me to throw it.
-Wait
-[grunts]
-Here we go.
-
Oh no.
There's sap on this target!
It's stuck to my hand!
Sandy, don't throw!
-Don't throw!
-[growls]
[panting]
[grunting]
-This is too easy.
Grug! Look out!
UGGA: Grug! Sandy! I
found a bone pile!
-Bone pile? I love bone piles!
[grunting]
-[gasps] Sandy!
-No! Wait!
-[growls]
[screaming]
Oh!
[Grug humming]
[dramatic sting]
-This is it, Hope.
Time to get even.
Grug! Watch your step!
[grunting]
[gasps, grunts]
[grunting, panting]
[slow motion]
Grug!
[normal speed yelling]
-[Grug humming]
-Phew! That was close.
[screaming]
-So, do you like your
new treehouse, Philliam?
What's that?
You want an elevator
because you don't have knees?
Not to worry, Philliam.
I'll help you up the stairs.
Walking up the stairs
with my stick legs
-HOPE: Phil!
-[screams, nervous laugh]
I give up. I tried your idea,
but every time Grug
is about to die,
someone or something saves him!
So, new idea. I need your help
putting Grug's life
in certaindanger.
-Yes!
I've been plotting Grug's demise
ever since that intolerable
ignoramus
dragged his knuckles
into our lives!
-I don't wanna kill him, Phil!
I want to almostkill him,
so I can save his life.
Natural peril is too
unpredictable.
-I can't say I'm
not disappointed,
but my plan should still work.
And it's the perfect crime.
At every meal, I shall steal
a tiny portion of food
from Grug's plate.
Over time, the slight drop
in daily nourishment
will cause Grug to
slowly weaken.
That's where phase two begins!
To maintain the ruse,
I'll decrease the weight
of everything Grug encounters
by an imperceptible amount.
Unaware of his
diminished strength,
Grug will become vulnerable.
Are you with me so far, Hope?
-Not even a little.
-Excellent!
Now, phase three
is where things get interesting.
-We're not doing that, Phil.
It's too complicated,
and it'll take forever!
Why don't you just
roll a boulder at him
and I'll push him
out of the way?
-[sighs] But that's so simple,
Grug could do it.
-That's why it will work!
-Okay, Phil.
The pie is in place.
Once Grug catches its scent,
he'll come running.
I'll give you the signal,
you push the boulder, and I'll
shove Grug out of the way.
Favor repaid. Nice and simple.
You got all that?
-Yes, dear. Nice and simple.
[maniacal laughter]
[muffled laughing]
-Why are you laughing?
-It's certainly not because
I made this simple plan
unnecessarily complicated.
-[laughing]
-Phil!
PHIL: Sorry!
[imitates static] Dear!
-You're! Cutting! Out!
-[growls]
-No, I'm not! [gasps]
-GRUG: Pie?
Where are you, pie?
[sniffing] I can smell ya.
-Phil! He's coming. Get ready.
-[panting]
-GRUG: Pie?
Out here instead of in
the kitchen where pie belongs?
-Works for me.
-Now, Phil.
[rumbling, crashing]
-Yes Yes Yes!
-[crashing, rumbling]
-No!
-Phil? What's going on?
Where's the boulder?
[groaning]
-[straining]
Working on it, dear!
-[loud chewing] Mm.
-Grug! Come back!
-Why? Is there more pie?
-Uh, maybe!
-Sold!
-[groaning, straining]
-Ah!
Yes!
No!
[both grunt, gasp]
-[gasps] Grug,
did you just save my life again?
-Huh. I guess I did.
-No
No
[echoing]
No!
-No, no, no-- [grunts]
Also ow, ow, ow!
GRUG:
Rock, leaf, sharp rock, rock!
-Leaf. Sorry, Dad. I win again.
-[Grug grumbles]
Maybe choose something
besides rock?
-No way! Rock never
lets you down.
-Even though I lose
every single time.
-Solid logic.
So, you were out
gathering berries
and the pie was just
sitting there?
-Yup! It's a whole new
pie species. Outside pie!
-I can't believe you saved
Hope's life again.
-He saved your life
twice? Wow, Mom!
You are in deep to Grug.
-Yes, Dawn. I'm well
aware of that,
-but thank you for reminding me.
-GRUG: Hey, Thunk!
I found some new berries.
Time for a new record!
-Bring the berry, Dad.
-[Hope gasps]
-[slow motion]
Ah
[normal speed gasp]
-You can't eat this berry.
It's poisonous.
-Oh. Thanks, Hope. Thunk.
-Nothin' but berry!
-Ah
-Grug! That one's
poisonous, too!
-Oh. Got it. Thunk?
-Berry or bust! Yeah!
-Grug! They're all poisonous!
[grunts]
-All of them?
-Yes! Now, give them to me!
[both struggling]
-[Grug grunts]
-UGGA: Hope!
You just saved Grug's life!
-[gasps] I'm free?
-I'm free
-Huh?
-I'm free!
-I guess that's an even-ing.
-Too bad it's not evening.
-Because then it'd be
an evening even-ing.
-But it's not in the even-ing.
Because I saved Grug's life
multiple times.
Three poison berries,
three saves.
So, youowe me!
You! Owe!
[echoing]
Me! Woo-hoo!
-What? I don't owe
Hope anything!
-I'm afraid you do, Grug.
You can no more escape
the even-ing
than you can escape the evening.
Hm Maybe I doneed
to rethink the name.
-What? No! The name's
the best part.
-B-b-but that's not
the Crood way. Right, Ugga?
-No, but it's Hope's way,
and she did save your life.
-[scoffs] Fine. I'll just do
some nice things for her,
and we'll be even.
Think she likes mini-caves?
-I think it's gonna take
more than mini-caves.
HOPE: Oh, Grug!
Could you give me a hand
with something?
-Aw Here we go!
Just gonna grab some
road berries
-Nope! 'Cause still poison.
-Aw
-So, what's up?
-Could you help me move
this chair to that corner?
-Do you a favor? My pleasure.
[grunts]
-No, that doesn't work.
Can you move it next to the bed?
[grunts]
-[heavy thud]
-Ah! That's even worse!
-By the door?
-[Grug sighs]
-[thud]
-Hm
Well, that makes nosense.
Why did you think
thatwould work?
-I didn't! You did!
-Maybe right there?
-[Grug growls]
-[thud]
-Perfect! Thanks for your help.
-But that's where it was
in the first place!
[sighs] At least that's over.
-DAWN: Nope!
-Ah!
-It's just the beginning!
-W-what are you doing?
-[mosqui-toads buzzing]
-Mom made me the fancy
robe I wanted,
so I'm returning the favor
by shooing
mosqui-toads away from her hut
and getting stung by
mosqui-toads. A lot!
-For how long?
-Great question
-that Mom won't answer.
-[buzzing]
HOPE:
Oh, Grug
-[panting]
Your bitter leaf juice is ready.
-Ooh
Too hot.
I want this place so
sparkling clean,
I can see my reflection.
-[squeaking]
-[grunting]
-Sparkly enough?
-That one is.
Now do the rest.
-Aw
[panting]
Your bitter leaf juice is ready.
-Brr! It's like a
tea made with ice!
-Who'd want to drink that?
-[sighs]
-[groaning, straining]
-[cart squeaking, rattling]
-Can you go any faster?
[struggling]
And make it less bumpy!
-[panting]
Your bitter leaf juice is ready.
-Perfect.
[sip]
Wait! Now, it's cold again.
[growls]
[Grug making whale noises]
[cawing]
[whale noise, caw]
-Grug!
-Shh! I just got Hope to sleep.
HOPE:
[groans] Huh?
[whale noise, screeching]
[groans, yelps, sighs]
-What are you doing?
-I'm trying to get even.
-By making
nighting-whale noises?
-Yeah. It helps Hope sleep.
[lowing, squawking]
-Well, it's helping me never
sleep again, so knock it off.
-I can't. [lows, squawks]
Hope won't let me.
[squawking, lows]
-Well, then it's time to get
even once and for all.
-By throwing tartichokes at her?
-Good idea, but I
have a better one.
-DAWN: Yes!
-BOTH: Ah!
-Whatever is, I'm in!
-GRAN: Right!
-ALL: Ah!
And I'll get rid of the bodies!
Wait. How many bodies
are we talking?
[groan, yawns]
-Oh Where are my sandals?
-Ah!
-Hope, I've been thinking.
I-I really haven't done enough
to pay you back
for saving my life.
-Right. You haven't.
Not even close.
-Uh-huh. So, I asked myself,
what can I do for
Hope to show her
just how much I appreciate it?
And then, I remembered
how much you love tartichokes.
-What's not to love?
Whatever you say, you're wrong.
They're the perfect mix
of sour and sweet.
-That's why I'm gonna take you
to a tartichoke patch I found.
Biggest tartichokes
you've ever seen.
Big as a boulder!
-Impossible for two reasons.
One, tartichokes don't
grow that big.
And two, I know where all
the best tartichoke patches are.
-But you don't know about
this one 'cause it's a secret.
-Secret tartichoke patch?
I'm intrigued.
Okay! I accept your
sweet invitation.
-Sweet andtart. Here we go!
-Now?
-GRUG: Yes, now!
[panting]
[groans]
-And when we get back,
I want you to mow the farm.
-Which part?
-The whole farm.
It's getting a little shaggy,
don't you think?
-[sighs] Yes, Hope.
-Am I detecting an attitude?
-No, Hope.
-Good.
Because I'd hate to think
you weren't grateful
to be alive,
thanks to me.
-I am, Hope.
-Great.
And when you're done with that,
you can dust the treehouse.
Inside andout.
-You want me to dust outside?
-If the dust wasn't outside,
it wouldn't get inside!
-[sighs] You want it,
you got it, Hope.
-Stop being so agreeable!
And how far away is this patch?
Are you sure this bridge
is safe, Grug?
It feels unstable.
-Oh, it's the safest!
-[creaking]
And it's the only way to get
to the secret tartichokes.
Trust me, this artichoke juice
-is worth the squeeze.
-You know, Grug,
you really didn't
have to do this.
I mean, I didn't ask you
to find me tartichokes.
-I know, but you're the reason
I'm still here,
and why Ugga still
has a husband,
and why my kids still
have a dad.
So this is the least I can do.
-Yes, I suppose so.
[bridge creaking]
-Time to even things up.
Now all I need is a sharp rock.
Rock, leaf, sharp rock,
rock. No. Rock,
leaf, sharp rock, rock.
[growls] Why do
I always pick rock?
C'mon, Grug, you can do this.
Rock, leaf, sharp
rock, sharp rock!
Yes! I did it!
-[creaking]
-Oh, Hope,
I'm gonna save your
life so hard
-HOPE: Hey, Grug?
-Nothing!
-Just wanted to tell you
I really appreciate this.
-Well, uh, what can I say?
I know you like tartichokes.
-I'm not talking about
the tartichokes.
I'm talking about you.
All I've ever wanted
was for people to appreciate
the things I do for them.
But you're the first person
to do something nice for me
that I didn't ask for.
[snapping]
So, thank you, Grug.
-Oh, uh Well,
you're welcome.
-Phil may be a genius,
but you're a rock.
Our rock. You keep
all of us safe,
and you never let us down.
-Right! That's why
I always pick rock!
Because I amone!
-Yes, you are.
And I'm gonna do something
nice for you right now
to thank you for all you do.
-I'm calling us even.
-R-really?
-Sure.
Sorry I made you do
all that work.
I hope you can forgive
me someday.
-[snap]
-Uh, let's make it today.
You're forgiven. We
should go. Now.
-Thank you, Grug.
Maybe people are
inherently good.
-Yep! Good! Let's go.
-I mean, here I was,
judging you
[both screaming]
-Hold on!
[both yelling]
-You said this bridge was safe!
Is this your idea of safe?!
-Well, yelling at
Grug doesn't help!
So let's swing our
way to safety!
Like punch monkeys! Come on!
[both grunting]
[stretching]
-[snap]
-[both scream]
HOPE:
Ah!
This is your fault, Grug!
-Again, yelling at Grug
solves nothing!
So let's shimmy like
shrimpmunks!
[both grunting]
[gasps]
[straining]
-Ah! Got any more great ideas?
-Uh, scream like screamfruit?
[both scream]
-[both grunt]
-[panting]
[panting]
Grab my hand. I can climb
and carry you to the top.
[gasping]
-Wait! Are you trying
to save my life?
-Yes! Now, give me your hand
before the vine snaps!
-No! If you save my life,
I'll owe you again!
[both yell]
-Ah!
-No, Hope.
Forget all that!
You don't owe me anything!
I told you, saving people
is what Croods do.
-No way! I can save myself!
[both yell]
-[grunts] No, you can't!
-Let [grunts] go [grunts]
-[Grug grunting]
-of me!
[both screaming]
-[both grunt]
-Gotcha!
-Gran! You saved us!
-What? Aw!
I thought you were someone
else. Oh, well.
-You know the best part, Grug?
-We don't have to
walk home now?
-No! Now, neither of us
owes each other anything!
-That's right! Because
youowe me!
And you're all mine until
I say otherwise!
[laughs] Oh, yeah!
I'm gonna grind you
into bone dust!
See you at sunrise,
and don't be late!
[ominous music]