The Croods: Family Tree (2021) s05e04 Episode Script

-[screams, grunts]
-[snarling]
-So, what are we doing here?
Is this about all those bones?
-No, Gran. Ugga's unveiling
a new sculpture. [laughs]
-Wait, what bones?
-I didn't say bones!
Yousaid bones!
-Let's hope this sculpture
goes better than her last few.
[sleepy humming]
[grumbles, gasps]
-Ah!
-Like it? It's your dad's head.
-Mom!
-[chewing]
-UGGA: Surprise!
DAWN:
Ah!
-I'm serving up
your dad's head on a plate.
-Ugga! Why?
[humming]
[loud chewing]
THUNK:
Ah!
Mom! Stop carving heads!
-This one is pretty
good, though.
-Paws off, grab-bag!
-[sighs] I miss those
crazy heads.
[Ugga clears throat]
-Art is the intersection
of truth and beauty.
An emotional journey.
That's why I've placed leaves
next to your seats to
wipe your tears.
When I started this sculpture,
I was alone.
Silence was my compass.
So was thiscompass.
-Hey! That's mycompass!
-UGGA: But then,
inspiration struck!
It is my honor to present
-Sorry I'm late.
I was making some snacks
for your big unveiling.
-Oh. Thanks, Hope.
As I was saying
-THUNK: What is that smell?
-[Ugga grumbles]
It smells like good
things taste. Mm
-It's just my papaynapple
surprise
for when Ugga's done.
Sorry. Go ahead, Ugga.
-Thanks. And now! I
present to you
-Ooh, what's the
surprise, Hope?
-You'll have to wait
to find out.
-[Ugga clears throat]
May I continue?
-Of course. Sorry, Uggs.
-I give to you
Papaynapple At Rest!
GRUG:
I love it!
Mm
[loud chewing]
-[laughing]
-BOTH: Mm
-I think I'm gonna cry.
-Way ahead of you. Mm
-[happy chewing]
-[Ugga growls]
- Let's live wild, the
world's our own
We built this wheel
now it's gunna roll
You know a spark
becomes a fire wherever we go
Whoa-ho-ho
stuck,
stuck together
It's an evolution
for worse or for better
To find some unity
For all humanity
Because we're
stuck together
In one big family tree
-Who does Hope think she is?
-Pretty sure
she thinks she's Hope.
Wait, wait, wait. Who
do youthink she is?
-I can't believe that she would
steal my thunder like that,
showing up with snacks
to my big sculpture show?
Besides, I made snacks.
-That's a snack? I thought
it was paint.
-Grug!
-Sorry.
Ugga, you're a great artist,
and Hope's a great cook.
But the thing is people
are always gonna
like food more than art
because you can't eat art.
Or can you
-[growling, gnawing]
-UGGA: That's not the point.
The point is I cancook.
I mean, I cooked all the time
before we got to the farm.
-You like my cooking, don't you?
-Mm
-Hope you guys like honey ribs!
[straining, grunting]
Mm. Too sticky?
-Glue isn't supposed
to be this sticky.
-[forceful]:
Mm!
-Roasted mahi-mahyena,
nice and fresh.
-[roaring]
-[screaming]
Too fresh?
-Hot chili!
-[hissing, bubbling]
-It's a little spicy.
[nervous murmuring]
[panting, yelling]
Too spicy?
[explosion]
-[snapping]
-Uh, what?
-You like my cooking,
don't you?
-I sure do, honey!
-Great! Then, help yourself.
-Uh, paint? Oh, no thanks.
I am stuffed!
Mm. [chewing]
Oh, so good. Mm!
-Ugh!
-Everyone enjoying
their Hope Roast?
-Mm
-Mm
-Mm
-Mm, mm, mmm!
-Thunk? What do youthink?
-Hope, you've outdone
yourself this time.
I'm giving this four yums.
-That's the most yums
you've ever given
one of my meals. Thank you.
-Oh no, Hope. Thank you.
-And what about you, Ugga?
-You've been awfully quiet.
-PHIL: Indeed.
I didn't hear a single "mm."
Ugga,
is your "mm" broken?
-[laughs] No. I was
just thinking
how unfair it is
that you have to do
-all the cooking
around here, Hope!
-I don't mind.
-Me neither! [chomp]
Mm, mm, mmm!
-I love cooking!
It's how I express myself.
-Sure, but maybe we could
start sharing the duties.
I know my family misses
mycave cooking.
-She's coming!
-So? You like my stew?
-[forced]:
Mm-hmm! [swallows] Love it!
-[nervous]: I think
it's a great idea, Mom.
-[forced]:
Yes. A great idea. Right, Thunk?
-Yep. Great idea.
[quiet]:
I was lying. Pretty smooth, huh?
-I'd rather bring
back the heads!
-Are you sure you want to?
There's a lot more to cooking
than smashing
or punching or kicking
or whatever it is you do.
-Yeah, Hope. Thanks.
I know that.
Because I can cook. In fact,
-why don't I make
dinner tomorrow?
-Uh, sounds great.
And I'll make a backup dinner
in case we need it.
-We won't need it.
-Right.
But I'll make one anyway,
just in case.
-Okay! It's just a roast.
How hard can it be?
-Strawpearies? In a roast?
Little on the sweet side,
don't you think?
-Obviously. I'm just, uh,
getting in the zone!
You know, the cooking zone!
-Hm. And you definitely
don't wanna
use a lemonectarine.
-Hope, do you mind?
-Sorry, Ugga.
You're right.
I'll just let you cook,
and I won't say another word.
Even though adding a burnip
is a huge mistake.
-You're right, Hope!
Thank you so much.
I mean, what was I thinking?
-It's my pleasure! Happy to--
Hot burnip! Hot burnip!
-Are you sure you don't
mind me cooking in your lab?
-Not at all! And everything
you need
to create a culinary masterpiece
is at your disposal.
-Thanks, Phil. You really
didn't have to do all this.
-Wait, why are you
doing all this?
-Long ago, before you
and the rest of your herd
lumbered onto the farm,
I offered to make dinner.
I spent hours
crafting my meal.
But when I served it,
Hope scoffed.
She said there were
[deep, distorted]:
too many flavors.
Which is absurd!
The more flavors
there are, the better!
[throat clear]
You are my chance at redemption!
-Feels like a lot
of pressure. Yeah.
And I'm not sure it's gonna
help me make this roast.
-Forget the roast.
That's Hope turf.
Youneed to plant your fork
in uncharted territory!
If we'regoing to defeat Hope,
we'll need something unexpected!
But also something delicious.
-Something with bananas?
-Yes
Bananas.
-[gasps] Oh.
You're not gonna stand there
and watch me cook, are you?
-Of course not.
Someone has to draw
Hope's attention elsewhere.
She can never learn
of my involvement,
but just know I'm
here, with you!
Watching! Waiting! Pacing!
Pinning all of my hopes on you!
[fire crackling]
Uh Uh, leaving.
[grunts]
[chattering]
-[grunting]
-[chattering]
-Banana bad!
[grunting, blows]
[yelling]
[chattering]
[humming]
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm!
[squishing, stirring]
[nervous chatter]
Hm
[disappointed chattering]
You know, this actually
isn't too--
[coughs] Wow.
That burnt hair flavor
really sneaks up on you.
Oh, sorry, guys.
I know it's bad.
[chattering]
And on fire! Ah!
Maybe all it needed
was a little heat?
[coughing] Nope.
Now, it's worse.
But no problem! I'll
make something else.
[sniffs] Woo! Just need to get
rid of this mess
before everything smells
like burnt banana. [laughs]
-[birds chirping]
-[Ugga grunting]
[sighs]
Rest in peels, bananas.
-[giggles] Good one, me.
-[sniffing]
What smells so delicious?
Wait. Did the bananas
get better?
Hm.
[gagging] No. So much worse.
Why does it taste like
shrimpossum sweat?
Ugh. [sniffing]
What is that?
[sniffing] Hm.
[sniffing]
-[ooking]
-Punch monkeys?!
[screeching]
I'm not here to fight.
I just want to know
what you're eating.
-[monkey grunts]
-It smells amazing.
[ooking]
Mm. Mm? Mm!
This is the best thing
I've ever tasted!
-What is it?
-[ooking]
Punch pie? Well, you should
call it perfect pie.
[angry ooks]
Fine. Ouch.
Stick with punch pie.
The point is, it's delicious.
-Mm!
-[ooking]
This? Oh, this? This
is, uh, garbage.
I actually came out
here to bury it.
[excited ooks]
Yeah, I-I wouldn't, uh,
do that if I were you.
[excited screeching]
It was never gonna be better
than Hope's cooking,
but at least someonelikes it.
If only I could make something
as delicious as punch pie.
Thatwould show Hope.
Huh? Hm
Hey, punch monkeys.
Let's make a deal.
-Well, where is she?
Why is this taking so long?
-Because cooking is hard,
especially when you don't know
what you're doing.
-[stomach growling]
-PHIL: Hm?
-I hope Mom gets here soon.
Dad's stomach
is about to lose it.
-Actually, that was mystomach.
-[whispers]: You're being rude.
-[stomach growls]
-Keep your shirt on, Carlos.
You think Mom's dinner
will be good?
-Of course, it'll be good!
I taught her everything
she knows about food,
especially food that doesn't
wanna be caught
and turned into food!
-I think Mom is gonna try
really hard to make it good,
butin case it isn't,
bite this,
-and you won't taste anything.
-For how long?
-Good question.
-I know. So, how long?
-Long enough to get
you through this dinner.
-Hm.
[chomp, chewing]
-Ah!
-[yelps]
-You don't need lava peppers.
We've got my backup dinner.
You can't be too prepared
when preparing dinner.
-Excellent idea, dear!
I'm sure Ugga's cuisine
will pale in comparison
to yours.
Or it will avenge me
-Dinner is served!
-[lisping]: What is it?
-I'm calling it Ugga Pie!
-I'll go get my backup dinner.
-[Ugga clears throat]
-Mm?
[angry growl]
Mm! [nervous laugh]
-[sniffing] Hm
Mm Hm?
Whoa! Mm!
My life is now divided
into two parts!
Before Ugga Pie and after.
It's delicious!
-[sniffing, chewing]
[lisps]:
It is? I can't taste a thing.
Did I even take a bite?
-Yeah. That's the lava pepper.
It'll wear off!
-I think.
-You think?
[satisfied humming]
-Honey, you did it.
You just did it.
[satisfied chewing]
-Smoky, earthy,
and just a hint of sweet.
I've never tasted anything
like it. Five yums!
-[gasps] Five yums? Let me try.
[noisy eating]
-So?
-[increasing intensity]:
Mm-mm-mm-mm-mm
[closed mouth scream]
[swallows]
-[sighs] It's fine.
-No! It's perfect! [gasps] Ooh!
Maybe you should call
it perfect pie!
-Mom, can you make dinner
tomorrow night?
-And the night after that?
-Let's not push our luck.
I mean, she made onegood meal.
It could be a fluke!
No offense, Ugga.
-None taken. And I'd love
to make dinner tomorrow night.
Sorry about your backup
dinner, Hope.
Maybe Chunky will eat it
[overlapping laughter, jeering]
-In your face, Hope!
-Yes
-[angry growl]
Yes-terday's dinner
was also delicious?
[grumbles, sighs]
-[aggressive chewing]
Bravo, Ugga!
Redemption is within
reach. [sighs]
I can't wait to see
what masterpiece
-you create next.
-Me neither.
[ooking]
Oh!
[laughs]
-Ugga Burgers!
-[gasping]
-[chomping]
-ALL: Mm!
-[overly satisfied]:
Mm!
-[ooking]
-[gasps]
-Ugg's Nuggs!
ALL:
Mm!
-Ugh
[ooking]
-[sniffing] And
nachos! By Ugga!
-Mm! [laughs]
BOTH:
Mm
[overlapping satisfied groans]
[chomp, ecstatic groaning]
[overjoyed laughter]
[crying]
-I've never dreamed that
food could taste this good!
-But here we are,
living the dream you never had.
[both crying]
[celebratory vocalizing]
-What is even happening?!
[laughter, cheering]
[growls]
[ooking]
-One order of freshly stomped
bananas for you.
So, what do you have
for me today?
Punch pancakes? Punch pasta?
Or maybe punch
stomped bananas?
-I don't understand.
-[ooking]
-You figured out the recipe?
But how?
[monkeys shrieking]
[shriek]
[curious ooks]
[excited chattering]
Ha! That's not the
recipe at all!
Becauseyou're missing
the secret ingredient.
[ook]
[boiling]
Oh. You discovered the
secret ingredient.
But what am I supposed to do?
My family is expecting
a delicious meal tonight!
-[ooking]
-What are you doing? Wait! Wait!
Are you closing an imaginary
door on me?
-[lock clicking]
-Huh?
-[key clatters]
-And tossing away the key?
-[banging on door]
-We had a deal! [sighs]
You know what? I don't need you!
I'll just whip up my own Ugga
special! And it'll be amazing!
[echoing]:
Because I'm an amazing cook!
[crying]
I'm a terrible cook.
I don't even think this is food.
-There you are, Ugga!
We're all anxiously
awaiting your next incredible
Billowing bullruses!
What is that?
And can it sense body heat?
-It's dinner, Phil.
'Cause I'm a terrible cook.
-Nonsense. I've tasted
your dishes.
Each one is better
than the last.
[sighs, whimpers]
-I didn't make that food.
The punch monkeys did.
And now they've cut me
off! What do I do?
-What do I do?!
-[groaning]
-You'll do what you must.
Because you're Ugga.
You're fearless, brave,
invincible!
And if Hope finds out,
she'll destroy you.
-You're right. Desperate times
call for desperate measures.
I know what to do!
-[gurgling]
-Hm
[sniffing]
[screaming]
Release me! [screaming]
This is mybody! You
can't have it!
[panting, grunts]
[monkeys ooking]
[grunting, panting]
[sliding hand]
[twisting doorknob]
-Looks like someone
forgot to lock
-thisimaginary door.
-[door creaks]
-[panting]
-[shuts door]
-[shrieking]
-[opens door]
-[grunting]
-HOPE: Gran?
[both scream]
-Oh! It's you.
Almost took your braid-holder
off, braids.
-Teach me!
-Fine! The thing about
hiding bones is you gotta--
-What? No! Teach
me how to cook.
You said you taught Ugga
everythingshe knows,
and I wanna know everything
Ugga knows!
-I don't know how to cook!
-But you said--
-I say a lot of things.
You can't hold me to what
comes out of my word cave.
And if you want to know
how to cook like Ugga,
why don't you ask her?
Just saw her in the woods.
-The woods?
-I never said she
was in the woods!
-You justsaid she
was in the woods.
-Like I said, I say
a lot of things!
That doesn't mean I
said 'em! [groans]
-You shouldn't have closed
the imaginary door on me!
-We had a deal!
-[shrieking]
[shrieking gets closer]
-No one double-crosses Ugga!
-[gasps]
[grunts]
-[shrieking]
-[grunts] No!
[gasps]
-My Ugg Rolls!
-Ugga! Are you okay?
-Hope? What are you doing here?
-I was looking for you,
and I saw everything.
-Uh, everything?
-Everything.
-Well, I guess that's that.
To be honest, I'm kind
of glad it's over.
-Oh, it's just getting started.
-[knuckles crack]
-Yeah. I should have
seen this coming.
-First, those awful
punch monkeys
steal your Ugg Rolls,
and then, when you
tried to get them back,
those little monsters
took them again!
Those Ugg Rolls looked amazing,
by the way.
-Wait, you think that
I mean, yes.
Yes! They stole the
food that I made.
So, that means
I don't have anything
for dinner tonight. I'm sorry.
-No, I'm the one who's sorry.
I underestimated you.
And you will have
something to serve
because we're getting
your food back!
-We are?
-I wonder what Mom's
making tonight.
-Ooh! I hope she's making
Ugga Pie again.
That lava pepper
finally wore off,
and I'd love
to actually taste it.
-Ugga Pie? Again? [scoffs]
I don't know if I can handle
that much deliciousness.
Oh, who am I kidding?
Of course, I can!
-Oh, no. Ugga Pie was
her early stuff.
Her new stuff is much
more experimental.
-I mean, nachos?
-[imitates explosion]
-Well, whatever it is,
I hope she gets here soon.
I'm so hungry, I could
eat my hand.
-Dad, please don't.
It'll just get stuck again
like last time.
-[muffled]: Too late.
-Maybe Mom can make
us something
to snack on while we wait.
-Where is Mom?
-GRAN: No idea!
Complete mystery!
Except I saw her go
into the woods
after I told her
I saw Ugga going into the woods.
-The woods?
But if Ugga's in the woods
-And Hope's in the woods
-Who's gonna make dinner?
-We're gonna die!
[screaming]
-Re! Claim! Your! Sanity!
-[grunting]
No one's! Going! To die!
Because I'mgoing
to make dinner.
-We're gonna die! [screaming]
[monkeys ooking]
HOPE: Just look at them.
Filthy little thieves.
You should be ashamed
of yourselves!
-You know they can't
hear you, right?
-I hope not. I'm just pumping
myself up! Getting in the zone!
-Look, I appreciate
what you're doing,
but I think we should
just go home.
-Too late! I'm in
the zone! Woo!
-Okay. But, you know, I think
I'm gonna stick to sculpting.
Cooking really is your
thing anyway.
-Don't you dare say that.
You're an amazing cook.
Maybe even better than me.
And I know how much
time and effort
goes into making a
delicious meal.
They are not going to
take that away from you!
-Wow, Hope.
That's really nice of you,
but I have to say something.
-We both do! We have to send
these bullies a message.
So let's teach these
punch monkeys
what punching really is!
[screaming]
-I really need to start
coming clean faster.
[monkeys ooking, chattering]
-Hyah! Hello, punch
monkeys. Surprised?
Well, you shouldn't be.
I saw you take my friend's
Ugg Rolls,
and I'm here to take 'em back!
You can try to stop me,
but you won't!
-[screech]
-In a few moons,
if you still feel punchy
about this,
I'll be waiting.
-[cracks knuckles]
-[ooking]
Forgot the Ugg Rolls.
[grunts]
[ook, growl]
-Hope! You're alive!
And you have the Ugg Rolls!
-Of course. I told you
I'd get them back.
To be honest, I think
the punch monkeys were relieved.
Every crime is really
just a cry for help.
I wouldn't be surprised
if they thank me.
-They're not going
to thank you.
-[thumping]
-They're gonna thump you!
-Run!
-[screeching]
This way!
-They took your Ugga
Burgers, too?
-Gimme that!
-[screech]
-[Ugga grunts]
-[chattering]
[panting]
-And your Ugg's Nuggs?
-[chattering]
-Gimme those!
-[shrieking]
[panting]
[sniffs] Ugh!
You can keep whatever that is.
[shrieking]
-Is that I think
they're performing
-Little Red Punching Hood.
-[ook]
HOPE:
And they're eating your nachos!
[panting]
-Oh, oh
-I'll be taking those,
thank you very much.
And, spoiler alert!
The granny's not
really a granny!
[shriek]
[panting]
-We're almost there, Hope!
-We are?
'Cause I can't see anything!
[panting]
[shriek]
-Ah! [grunts]
-Sorry. I was nacho-blocked.
[gasps]
And those monkeys are about
to get Hope-blocked!
-[sighs] Just give
me the food, Hope.
-Good thinking.
I'll hold them off
while you save
your culinary works of art.
You monkeys thirsty?
Well, I'm gonna pour you
a great big cup of Hope punch!
[screaming]
-[grunts]
-[shrieking]
-[screaming, shrieking]
-Stop!
-[groans]
-Ugga! What are you doing?
-[shriek]
-I'm coming clean. [grunting]
[ooking]
[sighs]
-[blows raspberry]
-[gasps]
They didn't steal my food.
I stole theirs.
-Right, after they
took it from you.
-No, Hope. I never
cooked that food.
I was jealous of how
everyone loved your food
and ignored my sculpture.
But when I tried to
make my own food,
it was a disaster!
So, I did what anyone would do.
I traded a bucket of charred,
stomped bananas
for delicious home-cooked meals
made by monkeys
and passed them off as my own.
I'm sorry.
[gasps]
-I'm so glad you can't cook.
-Huh?
-You're good at so
many other things,
and I hated that
you were good at this, too.
-So, you're not mad?
-How could I be mad?
I'm great, and you're terrible.
It's a win-win!
-Well, it's a win for you.
-It's actually two wins for me.
I'm a better cook,
and I forgive you.
-See? Win-win.
-Oh.
We should get going.
Grug probably has
both his hands stuck
in his mouth by now.
-[struggling]
-[Sandy laughs]
-This is the last time
you'll try to eat your hands,
right, Dad?
-Mm-mmm.
-Ugh.
-[struggling]
-Dad? Is dinner ready?
I'm so hungry, my
hands look good.
-Just putting on the garnish
[gasps] Sublime.
[struggling]
-Mom!
-[all gasping, cheering]
GRUG:
[muffled noises]
-I think what Grug is
trying to say is,
we're so glad you're here,
and we're so hungry.
What's for dinner?
-Well, everyone, the truth is--
-The truth is we're
having Ugga's Ribs.
She asked me to help
her bring them in.
[all eating happily]
I always make a backup meal.
-I hope everyone is hungry!
Because dinner is [gasps]
-Hm?
-[whimpers]
-[echoing]:
No!