The Twilight Zone (1959) s05e05 Episode Script
The Last Night of a Jockey
You unlock this door with the key of imagination.
Beyond it is another dimension- a dimension of sound a dimension of sight a dimension of mind.
You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of things and ideas.
You've just crossed over into the twilight zone.
Yeah.
This is grady.
Who? What paper? Oh, yeah.
Yeah, so you're the creep tha i said creep! Yeah, i know who you are.
I know who you are.
Sure, i read your column.
Every time i read it, it makes me sick.
I want to use a stomach pump! Don't try and nuzzle up to me with that "mr.
Grady" stuff.
Three years ago you stuck in the shiv! Listen to me, i had nothing to do with horse doping.
Nothing- you understand that? Uh-huh.
Sure, a couple of taps on the typewriter and i get a 60-day suspension! You can talk pretty safe now you're 50 blocks away.
If you were here in this room now, i'd scrape you off the wall and put you in a cup! How does that grab you? This is a statement to the press! Grady to the press, you fink.
You hyenas down there.
Listen, and don't forget to spell the name correct! G-r-a-d-y! You chump.
You stupid, rotten chump.
Just on account of a couple of fixes, huh? Big boys walk away with all the big dough.
What do you walk away with, huh? A bagful of change.
What are you going to do now? I know what you'll do.
You get a carriage, and you'll drive lovers through central park.
Grady, you kill me.
You you kill me, boy.
Yes you runt! You shrimp! What are you going to do now, pal? What can you do? The name is grady- five feet short in stockings and boots, a slightly distorted offshoot of a good breed of humans who race horses.
He happens to be one of the rotten apples, bruised and yellowed by dealing in dirt, a short man with a short memory who's forgotten that he's worked for the sport of kings and helped turn it into a cesspool, used and misused by the two-legged animals who have hung around sporting events since the days of the coliseum.
So this is grady, on his last night as a jockey.
Behind him are hialeah, hollywood park and saratoga.
Rounding the far turn and coming up fast on the rail- is the twilight zone.
How goes the world, mr.
Grady? Who? What? Little tight on the turns? Bogged down by a muddy track? How goes it, mr.
Grady? It's a gag.
It's a gag.
Huh? It's a gag, huh? All right, now.
Look you you made your point.
Where are you? Where am i? I'm between the frontal lobes, mr.
Grady.
What? Inside your head- securely nestled in the gray convolutions.
Convolutions? Just what is that supposed to mean? I'm inside your head, mr.
Grady.
My head? How you like it in there, huh? How you like it in there? Are you comfortable? Huh? Excuse me for laughing.
That's a funny question.
Comfortable inside your head? It's like sleeping in the midst of a parade on 42nd street- noisy, crowded, uncomfortable.
In fact, i'm sick of it.
If you're sick of it, get out.
You're sick of it.
Get out of there.
I wished i could.
It would be much more comfortable outside instead of being cooped up in that tiny little brain of yours.
Who are you? I'm your memory, your conscience, mr.
Grady.
I'm every one of your aspirations and recollections.
I'm every one of your failures and defeats.
I also wear the wreaths of all your victories.
I'm what you call the "alter ego.
" Ego.
Big deal.
Big deal! What do you want? I think the apt question would be, "what is it you want?" It's a hot one, huh? What do i want? I don't need a thing.
What do i want? You really are a dumb little runt.
That's what you call yourself, isn't it? "Runt" or was it "shrimp"? Why don't you get out of here? How do i get you out of here? You don't, you don't.
You live with me.
In fact, you might find me very interesting.
I know you very well, mr.
Grady.
There isn't one thought that crosses your mind that i'm not aware of.
There isn't one ugly recollection, one bitter little shame that i'm not aware of.
Bitter little shame.
You don't know me from man o'war.
I got no bitter recollections.
Oh, come now, mr.
Grady.
Look, shall we look at the record book? Suspended for riding infractions.
It wasn't my fault.
for failure to report a bribe offer.
I was framed.
And now most recently the crowning touch to an illustrious career lifetime suspension for race fixing, horse doping.
I didn't dope any horses.
Career's shot.
Roughly eight dollars in your jeans.
I don't need you.
It won't be any time at all.
Two year's time i'll be back up riding five or six winners a day.
You'll drive a carriage with lovers in it through central park.
Knock it off! No, you need me, mr.
Grady.
In fact, you have desperate need of me.
Knock it off! Where are you now? Huh? Where are you now? Ah, you fake! I need you like i need pneumonia.
Like i need a fractured leg, that's how i need you.
Who do you think you're talking to anyway? Who do you think you're talking to? I make one phone call to hencheck, one phone call, and in an hour's time, i'm on my way to puerto rico riding in the warm sun.
Two years time, i'll be back here riding in silks.
Why don't you call mr.
Hencheck? Go ahead, give him a buzz.
I'll show you, loudmouth.
I'll make you eat every rotten word.
Hello, this is grady.
Hencheck there? I want to talk to him! Listen to this.
Hello, hencheck, it's grady.
What's to be surprised about? You had your boat race, so you made your pile.
I'm down to my last eight bucks.
I figure it's time that grady got his, see? I figure that hencheck.
Very unappreciative.
Well, that's the breaks.
They take, they never give.
What's to do now? Write a will and take gas? Look, i could nickel-and-dime or i could buy and sell him a year ago.
I don't need him.
I don't need you.
I don't need nobody.
I was a big man once.
I can be big again.
Wait and see.
You know, it was just a year ago you were strutting around the country, you wore nice, shiny shoes, new clothes, tipped big.
You had some compensation then, mr.
Grady.
Compensation? For the fact that you're a little runt.
For the unpleasant realization that all your life you've had to stand on tiptoe to look at what's around you.
I wish you were here right now, hear me? I wish you were here right now.
Just look down under your feet.
Mr.
Grady, you know what you want? You want to be respected.
Up on a horse you're a man.
On the ground you're a half-pint.
Shut up! Shut up! Shut up, you understand? Easy, mr.
Grady.
Easy does it, easy does it.
Now we get to the moment of truth- the ultimate.
Now you hit pay dirt, kid.
You get whatever you want.
What do you mean "whatever i want"? Tell me, what is it you want more than anything else on the earth? This is the moment, this is it.
What is it you want, mr.
Grady? Name it- it's yours.
What do i want? What do i want? I want to be the biggest.
Hear me? Yeah, that's what i want.
I want to be the biggest.
I want to be big! Damn you, i want to be big! Have a good rest, mr.
Grady? Yeah.
Yeah.
I had a good rest.
This is wild.
This is wild.
Like what you see? What is this? Am i dreaming? Is this is a dream? A dream- oh, come now.
Look, touch the dresser.
Yeah.
Yeah, i'll touch it.
Yeah, that's it.
Now touch the overhead beam.
Yeah.
These are all very solid objects- width, height, thickness and reality.
Yeah yeah.
Hey, what is this? You had your heart's desire.
You didn't ask for a two-hour escape with morpheus.
You wanted stature, mr.
Grady.
You wanted size.
You wanted a view from a long way up and a long way out.
Yeah, i wanted size.
You wanted to be big.
Well, look at yourself.
You're big.
You're mr.
Big.
You're hercules, you're the most sizable thing since paul bunyan.
You don't have any complaints that you want to trot out, do you? Complaints? Do i have any complaints? No, i have no complaints.
Hey, you know what this calls for? This calls for a-a celebration.
Look, hey, here, hey, you drink, don't ya? Huh? You drink? Go right ahead.
Be my guest.
Yeah, well, here's mud in your eye.
Too bad you can't enjoy this with me.
I'm joining you, i'm joining you.
Believe me, i'm feeling the hot little ripples just as you do.
You do, huh? Yeah? Well, you stay right in there.
You stay there.
I'm gonna have some fun, you understand? I'm gonna have some fun! See?! Ooh, careful, careful.
You don't want to go through the floor.
Hey mr.
Grady.
Mr.
Grady! Yeah.
Like the view, do you? I love it.
I love it.
You know what i'm going to do now? I'm gonna make a call, a telephone call to somebody very special, a very, very special girl.
And when she hears about this she's going to flip.
Really, pal, are you that attractive? Tell me, does size mean that much? You bet your bottom dollar it does.
You know she used to lean over and pat me on the head.
Hello, honey.
Hello, doll.
You know who this is? This is grady.
Yeah.
Wait a minute, honey, don't brush me off.
This is your ex-meal ticket, an eight-course meal ticket at that! Now listen to this, honey i'm big.
Understand that? I'm b-l-g.
Big, big, big, big, big.
I don't know, i may be six, seven, eight feet tall.
I don't know.
The lakers will be scouting me any day now.
Huh? What a minute, you don't talk to me like th you don't talk to me like that, i said.
You heard what i i'll slap your face off! You no good alley cat! That's great- that was wonderful.
You managed to flex your muscles in a most impressive fashion.
At this rate you're going, women all over the world will be flocking to your doorstep no doubt.
Well, i can call 12 girls.
Just because i struck out this time, i could call 12 girls prettier and nicer than that one.
You don't believe me, do you? So far you just haven't impressed me.
Well, i will.
I will.
Yeah.
What do you mean, too loud? Oh.
How's that, mac, is that better? Good.
Hmm? What time? Yeah.
Yeah, i'll be expecting his call.
Thank you.
Yeah.
He knows the number, doesn't he? Fine, fine.
Thanks.
What was that all about? That was a fellow telling me that a lawyer was going to call me from the racing commission.
Hey, tell me, who are you? My imagination? You, uh, you don't have very much imagination, mr.
Grady.
Wait a minute, who are you, what are you? I mean, what's all this "alter ego" jazz? Well, i'll tell you, mr.
Grady.
I'll try to make it as simple as possible.
I'm the fate every man makes for himself.
You generally find me down at the bottom of the barrel.
I'm the strength dredged up in desperation.
I'm the last gasp.
That's supposed to be clear, huh? You're nothing! Nothing, understand? Oh, i'm something.
Really, i'm something.
In some cases i'm something very good.
In some cases- depending upon the person i'm representing- i can work miracles.
You do? I come with heroism, sacrifice, strength, and even better than that, i can epitomize everything noble in men.
You can, huh? Now, in your case, mr.
Grady, your requirements were quite small.
What do you mean, quite small? Your dreams were rather insignificant, your aspirations hardly worth mentioning.
I mean to say, if you had asked to win the kentucky derby, and win it cleanly and with honor, that would've been quite a moment, wouldn't it? Yeah.
That'd been the greatest.
Or if you'd asked to perform an act of heroism, let's say, that would've been qualification for the respect you seek.
This, too, would've been exemplary, right? I suppose that would've been all right, yeah.
But as it is, mr.
Grady, what was your heart's desire? Well, i wanted i wanted i wanted to to be a big man.
That's right, yes.
Big in the sense that your hands can smother a telephone, your face can overshoot its reflections in the mirror.
You come real cheap.
I don't come cheap.
All i ever wanted out of life was the fact that i could walk down the street and people not stare at me like i was a freak! I am not cheap, buddy.
I don't come cheap.
I've got my heart's desire.
Yeah? Yes, mr.
Newman.
Yes, sir.
Really? Really? Do you? Thank you, sir.
You don't know how much this means to me.
Thank the members of the board, and thank everybody that went to bat for me, will you? Just just thank them.
Tell them how much i appreciate it.
Thank you very much, mr.
Newman.
And listen, tell everybody they don't have to worry about me anymore.
I'll play it straight.
I mean, no worries.
Cut-and-dried, you understand? When grady's up, the worries are over, right? Thanks, mr.
Newman.
And thank everybody for me.
Right.
Good-bye.
What do you think now, loudmouth? Everything's going my way.
One phone call and you're top dog, huh? You know who that was? That was the racing commission.
A lot of owners have signed a petition.
They want me to ride again, do you understand that? They want grady to ride again.
I'm going to ride again.
What's so funny? Eh? What's so funny about me riding? Eh i'm going to ri wait a minute.
I'm too big.
I'm too big.
I'm too big! I can't ride! Wait a minute! I can't ride! I can't wear my clothes! I'm too i'm too big! I'm too big! Hear me? I'm too big! I can't ride! No! Please, please please make me small! Please, i'll never ask for anything again.
Please make me small.
Please! Oh, god.
Youaresmall, mr.
Grady.
You see, every time you won an honest race, that's when you were a giant.
Right now they just don't come any smaller.
The name is grady, ten feet tall, a slightly distorted offshoot of a good breed of humans who race horses.
Unfortunately for mr.
Grady, he learned too late that you don't measure size with a ruler, you don't figure height with a yardstick and you never judge a man by how tall he looks in a mirror.
The giant is as he does.
You can make a parimutuel bet on this- win, place or show- in or out of the twilight zone.
Beyond it is another dimension- a dimension of sound a dimension of sight a dimension of mind.
You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of things and ideas.
You've just crossed over into the twilight zone.
Yeah.
This is grady.
Who? What paper? Oh, yeah.
Yeah, so you're the creep tha i said creep! Yeah, i know who you are.
I know who you are.
Sure, i read your column.
Every time i read it, it makes me sick.
I want to use a stomach pump! Don't try and nuzzle up to me with that "mr.
Grady" stuff.
Three years ago you stuck in the shiv! Listen to me, i had nothing to do with horse doping.
Nothing- you understand that? Uh-huh.
Sure, a couple of taps on the typewriter and i get a 60-day suspension! You can talk pretty safe now you're 50 blocks away.
If you were here in this room now, i'd scrape you off the wall and put you in a cup! How does that grab you? This is a statement to the press! Grady to the press, you fink.
You hyenas down there.
Listen, and don't forget to spell the name correct! G-r-a-d-y! You chump.
You stupid, rotten chump.
Just on account of a couple of fixes, huh? Big boys walk away with all the big dough.
What do you walk away with, huh? A bagful of change.
What are you going to do now? I know what you'll do.
You get a carriage, and you'll drive lovers through central park.
Grady, you kill me.
You you kill me, boy.
Yes you runt! You shrimp! What are you going to do now, pal? What can you do? The name is grady- five feet short in stockings and boots, a slightly distorted offshoot of a good breed of humans who race horses.
He happens to be one of the rotten apples, bruised and yellowed by dealing in dirt, a short man with a short memory who's forgotten that he's worked for the sport of kings and helped turn it into a cesspool, used and misused by the two-legged animals who have hung around sporting events since the days of the coliseum.
So this is grady, on his last night as a jockey.
Behind him are hialeah, hollywood park and saratoga.
Rounding the far turn and coming up fast on the rail- is the twilight zone.
How goes the world, mr.
Grady? Who? What? Little tight on the turns? Bogged down by a muddy track? How goes it, mr.
Grady? It's a gag.
It's a gag.
Huh? It's a gag, huh? All right, now.
Look you you made your point.
Where are you? Where am i? I'm between the frontal lobes, mr.
Grady.
What? Inside your head- securely nestled in the gray convolutions.
Convolutions? Just what is that supposed to mean? I'm inside your head, mr.
Grady.
My head? How you like it in there, huh? How you like it in there? Are you comfortable? Huh? Excuse me for laughing.
That's a funny question.
Comfortable inside your head? It's like sleeping in the midst of a parade on 42nd street- noisy, crowded, uncomfortable.
In fact, i'm sick of it.
If you're sick of it, get out.
You're sick of it.
Get out of there.
I wished i could.
It would be much more comfortable outside instead of being cooped up in that tiny little brain of yours.
Who are you? I'm your memory, your conscience, mr.
Grady.
I'm every one of your aspirations and recollections.
I'm every one of your failures and defeats.
I also wear the wreaths of all your victories.
I'm what you call the "alter ego.
" Ego.
Big deal.
Big deal! What do you want? I think the apt question would be, "what is it you want?" It's a hot one, huh? What do i want? I don't need a thing.
What do i want? You really are a dumb little runt.
That's what you call yourself, isn't it? "Runt" or was it "shrimp"? Why don't you get out of here? How do i get you out of here? You don't, you don't.
You live with me.
In fact, you might find me very interesting.
I know you very well, mr.
Grady.
There isn't one thought that crosses your mind that i'm not aware of.
There isn't one ugly recollection, one bitter little shame that i'm not aware of.
Bitter little shame.
You don't know me from man o'war.
I got no bitter recollections.
Oh, come now, mr.
Grady.
Look, shall we look at the record book? Suspended for riding infractions.
It wasn't my fault.
for failure to report a bribe offer.
I was framed.
And now most recently the crowning touch to an illustrious career lifetime suspension for race fixing, horse doping.
I didn't dope any horses.
Career's shot.
Roughly eight dollars in your jeans.
I don't need you.
It won't be any time at all.
Two year's time i'll be back up riding five or six winners a day.
You'll drive a carriage with lovers in it through central park.
Knock it off! No, you need me, mr.
Grady.
In fact, you have desperate need of me.
Knock it off! Where are you now? Huh? Where are you now? Ah, you fake! I need you like i need pneumonia.
Like i need a fractured leg, that's how i need you.
Who do you think you're talking to anyway? Who do you think you're talking to? I make one phone call to hencheck, one phone call, and in an hour's time, i'm on my way to puerto rico riding in the warm sun.
Two years time, i'll be back here riding in silks.
Why don't you call mr.
Hencheck? Go ahead, give him a buzz.
I'll show you, loudmouth.
I'll make you eat every rotten word.
Hello, this is grady.
Hencheck there? I want to talk to him! Listen to this.
Hello, hencheck, it's grady.
What's to be surprised about? You had your boat race, so you made your pile.
I'm down to my last eight bucks.
I figure it's time that grady got his, see? I figure that hencheck.
Very unappreciative.
Well, that's the breaks.
They take, they never give.
What's to do now? Write a will and take gas? Look, i could nickel-and-dime or i could buy and sell him a year ago.
I don't need him.
I don't need you.
I don't need nobody.
I was a big man once.
I can be big again.
Wait and see.
You know, it was just a year ago you were strutting around the country, you wore nice, shiny shoes, new clothes, tipped big.
You had some compensation then, mr.
Grady.
Compensation? For the fact that you're a little runt.
For the unpleasant realization that all your life you've had to stand on tiptoe to look at what's around you.
I wish you were here right now, hear me? I wish you were here right now.
Just look down under your feet.
Mr.
Grady, you know what you want? You want to be respected.
Up on a horse you're a man.
On the ground you're a half-pint.
Shut up! Shut up! Shut up, you understand? Easy, mr.
Grady.
Easy does it, easy does it.
Now we get to the moment of truth- the ultimate.
Now you hit pay dirt, kid.
You get whatever you want.
What do you mean "whatever i want"? Tell me, what is it you want more than anything else on the earth? This is the moment, this is it.
What is it you want, mr.
Grady? Name it- it's yours.
What do i want? What do i want? I want to be the biggest.
Hear me? Yeah, that's what i want.
I want to be the biggest.
I want to be big! Damn you, i want to be big! Have a good rest, mr.
Grady? Yeah.
Yeah.
I had a good rest.
This is wild.
This is wild.
Like what you see? What is this? Am i dreaming? Is this is a dream? A dream- oh, come now.
Look, touch the dresser.
Yeah.
Yeah, i'll touch it.
Yeah, that's it.
Now touch the overhead beam.
Yeah.
These are all very solid objects- width, height, thickness and reality.
Yeah yeah.
Hey, what is this? You had your heart's desire.
You didn't ask for a two-hour escape with morpheus.
You wanted stature, mr.
Grady.
You wanted size.
You wanted a view from a long way up and a long way out.
Yeah, i wanted size.
You wanted to be big.
Well, look at yourself.
You're big.
You're mr.
Big.
You're hercules, you're the most sizable thing since paul bunyan.
You don't have any complaints that you want to trot out, do you? Complaints? Do i have any complaints? No, i have no complaints.
Hey, you know what this calls for? This calls for a-a celebration.
Look, hey, here, hey, you drink, don't ya? Huh? You drink? Go right ahead.
Be my guest.
Yeah, well, here's mud in your eye.
Too bad you can't enjoy this with me.
I'm joining you, i'm joining you.
Believe me, i'm feeling the hot little ripples just as you do.
You do, huh? Yeah? Well, you stay right in there.
You stay there.
I'm gonna have some fun, you understand? I'm gonna have some fun! See?! Ooh, careful, careful.
You don't want to go through the floor.
Hey mr.
Grady.
Mr.
Grady! Yeah.
Like the view, do you? I love it.
I love it.
You know what i'm going to do now? I'm gonna make a call, a telephone call to somebody very special, a very, very special girl.
And when she hears about this she's going to flip.
Really, pal, are you that attractive? Tell me, does size mean that much? You bet your bottom dollar it does.
You know she used to lean over and pat me on the head.
Hello, honey.
Hello, doll.
You know who this is? This is grady.
Yeah.
Wait a minute, honey, don't brush me off.
This is your ex-meal ticket, an eight-course meal ticket at that! Now listen to this, honey i'm big.
Understand that? I'm b-l-g.
Big, big, big, big, big.
I don't know, i may be six, seven, eight feet tall.
I don't know.
The lakers will be scouting me any day now.
Huh? What a minute, you don't talk to me like th you don't talk to me like that, i said.
You heard what i i'll slap your face off! You no good alley cat! That's great- that was wonderful.
You managed to flex your muscles in a most impressive fashion.
At this rate you're going, women all over the world will be flocking to your doorstep no doubt.
Well, i can call 12 girls.
Just because i struck out this time, i could call 12 girls prettier and nicer than that one.
You don't believe me, do you? So far you just haven't impressed me.
Well, i will.
I will.
Yeah.
What do you mean, too loud? Oh.
How's that, mac, is that better? Good.
Hmm? What time? Yeah.
Yeah, i'll be expecting his call.
Thank you.
Yeah.
He knows the number, doesn't he? Fine, fine.
Thanks.
What was that all about? That was a fellow telling me that a lawyer was going to call me from the racing commission.
Hey, tell me, who are you? My imagination? You, uh, you don't have very much imagination, mr.
Grady.
Wait a minute, who are you, what are you? I mean, what's all this "alter ego" jazz? Well, i'll tell you, mr.
Grady.
I'll try to make it as simple as possible.
I'm the fate every man makes for himself.
You generally find me down at the bottom of the barrel.
I'm the strength dredged up in desperation.
I'm the last gasp.
That's supposed to be clear, huh? You're nothing! Nothing, understand? Oh, i'm something.
Really, i'm something.
In some cases i'm something very good.
In some cases- depending upon the person i'm representing- i can work miracles.
You do? I come with heroism, sacrifice, strength, and even better than that, i can epitomize everything noble in men.
You can, huh? Now, in your case, mr.
Grady, your requirements were quite small.
What do you mean, quite small? Your dreams were rather insignificant, your aspirations hardly worth mentioning.
I mean to say, if you had asked to win the kentucky derby, and win it cleanly and with honor, that would've been quite a moment, wouldn't it? Yeah.
That'd been the greatest.
Or if you'd asked to perform an act of heroism, let's say, that would've been qualification for the respect you seek.
This, too, would've been exemplary, right? I suppose that would've been all right, yeah.
But as it is, mr.
Grady, what was your heart's desire? Well, i wanted i wanted i wanted to to be a big man.
That's right, yes.
Big in the sense that your hands can smother a telephone, your face can overshoot its reflections in the mirror.
You come real cheap.
I don't come cheap.
All i ever wanted out of life was the fact that i could walk down the street and people not stare at me like i was a freak! I am not cheap, buddy.
I don't come cheap.
I've got my heart's desire.
Yeah? Yes, mr.
Newman.
Yes, sir.
Really? Really? Do you? Thank you, sir.
You don't know how much this means to me.
Thank the members of the board, and thank everybody that went to bat for me, will you? Just just thank them.
Tell them how much i appreciate it.
Thank you very much, mr.
Newman.
And listen, tell everybody they don't have to worry about me anymore.
I'll play it straight.
I mean, no worries.
Cut-and-dried, you understand? When grady's up, the worries are over, right? Thanks, mr.
Newman.
And thank everybody for me.
Right.
Good-bye.
What do you think now, loudmouth? Everything's going my way.
One phone call and you're top dog, huh? You know who that was? That was the racing commission.
A lot of owners have signed a petition.
They want me to ride again, do you understand that? They want grady to ride again.
I'm going to ride again.
What's so funny? Eh? What's so funny about me riding? Eh i'm going to ri wait a minute.
I'm too big.
I'm too big.
I'm too big! I can't ride! Wait a minute! I can't ride! I can't wear my clothes! I'm too i'm too big! I'm too big! Hear me? I'm too big! I can't ride! No! Please, please please make me small! Please, i'll never ask for anything again.
Please make me small.
Please! Oh, god.
Youaresmall, mr.
Grady.
You see, every time you won an honest race, that's when you were a giant.
Right now they just don't come any smaller.
The name is grady, ten feet tall, a slightly distorted offshoot of a good breed of humans who race horses.
Unfortunately for mr.
Grady, he learned too late that you don't measure size with a ruler, you don't figure height with a yardstick and you never judge a man by how tall he looks in a mirror.
The giant is as he does.
You can make a parimutuel bet on this- win, place or show- in or out of the twilight zone.