Tales from the Crypt (1989) s05e06 Episode Script
Two for the Show
I TELL YOU, LADIES AND GERMS, THAT GHOUL-FRIEND OF MINE MAKES ME SO CRAZY.
SHE TOLD ME SHE THOUGHT SHE'D LOOK GOOD IN SOMETHING LONG AND FLOWING SO I THREW HER IN THE MISSISSIPPI.
AND HOW 'BOUT THAT ERNEST HEMINGWAY? ALWAYS SHOOTING HIS MOUTH OFF.
HELLO? ANYBODY? I KNOW YOU'RE OUT THERE, FOLKS.
I CAN HEAR YOU BLEEDING.
IS THIS ON? HMM.
I KNOW WHAT THIS CROWD WANTS.
A LITTLE SLAY ON WORDS.
MAYBE A COUPLE OF NASTY FRIGHT GAGS? GET A LIFE! SOMETHING ALONG THE LINES OF TONIGHT'S NASTY NUGGET.
IT'S A LITTLE TALE ABOUT MARRIAGE, OR IF YOU PREFER, ABOUT WIFE AND DEATH.
I CALL IT TWO FOR THE SHOW.
SO I GET UP, AND I SAY, "HEY, SCREW MAKIN' A LOT OF STUPID PRODUCT IMPROVEMENTS THAT NOBODY CARES ABOUT.
" YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING HERE? I MEAN, WHY SPEND ALL THAT MONEY WHEN FOR NOTHING, WE CAN FIND WAYS TO SELL WHAT'S THERE TO ALL THOSE MARKETS THAT NEVER THOUGHT OF BUYING OUR STUFF IN THE FIRST PLACE.
I MEAN, THAT IS BRILLIANT.
AND STILL, I'M CATCHING FLAK FROM MORONS LIKE-- LIKE QUIMBY.
I MEAN, THIS DICKHEAD THINKS THAT JUST BECAUSE HE WENT AND COMMISSIONED SOME GODDAMN FEASIBILITIES STUDY THAT EVERYONE SHOULD BACK OFF, YOU KNOW? I MEAN, LIKE THE WHOLE THING WAS HIS IDEA IN THE FIRST PLACE.
I MEAN, CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS GUY? SO, ANYWAY, I SAID TO QUIMBY, "LOOK, YOU ASSHOLE, "I'M GONNA FIGHT YOU ON THIS.
"I'M GONNA FIGHT YOU ALL THE WAY "TO THE GODDAMN BOARD OF DIRECTORS.
IF I HAVE TO.
" AND YOU KNOW WHAT HE SAID? HE SAID, "I DON'T CARE.
" SO I SAID TO HIM, "OK, FINE, PAL.
"BE THAT WAY, 'CAUSE ONE OF THESE DAYS "I'M GONNA BE A VICE PRESIDENT, "AND WHEN THAT DAY COMES, I'M GONNA SQUASH YOU LIKE THE INSECT THAT YOU ARE.
" MMM.
THIS IS REALLY GOOD.
YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN THE LOOK ON HIS FACE.
AND THEN--OH, OH, I FORGOT TO TELL YOU.
THERE'S A BIG COCKTAIL PARTY SUNDAY AFTERNOON.
I KNOW, I KNOW.
YOU HATE THESE WEEKEND THINGS, BUT THIS ONE IS REALLY IMPORTANT.
I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY TO YOU, ANDY.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT? I-I'D LIKE YOU TO TRY HARDER TO BE MORE SOCIAL.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? IT'S NOT ABOUT LIKING PEOPLE OR NOT LIKING PEOPLE.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? I'M LEAVING YOU, ANDY.
YOU KNOW, IF YOU WANT.
I'LL EVEN-- I'LL MAKE A LIST OF THINGS FOR YOU TO TALK ABOUT.
THAT WAY YOU WON'T--WHAT? I SAID, "I'M LEAVING YOU.
" I WANT A DIVORCE.
YOU WHAT? ALL YOU CARE ABOUT ANYMORE IS WORK.
I WANT PASSION, I WANT HOT SEX ON A WHITE SAND BEACH, I WANT TO HAVE A LITTLE FUN AND ADVENTURE WHILE I'M STILL YOUNG ENOUGH TO ENJOY IT.
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
WHAT'S THIS REALLY ABOUT? WHAT? YOU WANT ME TO INCREASE YOUR ALLOWANCE? IS THAT IT? I DON'T WANT MONEY, ANDY! I WANT OUT! IF YOU WANT TO KNOW THE TRUTH I'VE BEEN HAVING AN AFFAIR.
AN AFFAIR.
I'M IN LOVE, AND I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW GREAT IT FEELS.
WE'RE RUNNING AWAY TOGETHER, AND THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT.
WHO IS HE? IT'S NOBODY YOU KNOW.
I WANT THE NAME.
WHY? WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO? SQUASH HIM LIKE AN INSECT? YOU'RE NOT THE MAN I MARRIED, ANDY, AND IF YOU ARE, I DIDN'T KNOW IT.
EITHER WAY, THE THOUGHT OF SPENDING THE REST OF MY LIFE WITH YOU IS JUST TOO DAMN DEPRESSING.
IF ANYBODY WANTS ME, I'LL BE IN CHICAGO.
OK, OK, YOU'RE SERIOUS.
I CAN SEE THAT NOW.
BUT--BUT LOOK, YOU'VE GOT TO WORK WITH ME ON THIS, OK? I'M NOT NEGOTIATING WITH YOU, ANDY.
I DON'T WANT ANYTHING EXCEPT A LIFE.
SO WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? YOU'RE JUST GOING TO WALK OUT ON ME? THE WAY I SEE IT, ANDY, YOU WALKED OUT ON ME YEARS AGO.
WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME WE MADE LOVE? CAN YOU EVEN REMEMBER? DON'T DO THIS TO ME, EMMA.
YOU KNOW WHAT KINDA SCHMUCK I'M GONNA LOOK LIKE? THAT'S WHAT REALLY BOTHERS YOU, ISN'T IT? WELL, LET ME PUT YOUR MIND TO REST.
YOU ALREADY LOOK LIKE A SCHMUCK.
BECAUSE YOU ARE A SCHMUCK.
AAHH! SCHMUCK? WHO'S A SCHMUCK, HUH? GOOD, BITCH.
YOU WANT PASSION, EMMA? HOW'S THIS? DAMN BITCH.
COME HERE! POLICE DEPARTMENT.
ARE YOU SURE IT WAS A SCREAM? THAT'S RIGHT.
YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT.
YOU KNOW WHAT? I DON'T CARE ANYMORE, AND I'M TIRED OF TALKIN'-- TO HELL WITH ME? NO, TO HELL WITH YOU! RIGHT, BUT YOU'RE SURE IT WAS A SCREAM? MM-HMM.
YOU SAY THE WOOD GLEN APARTMENTS.
DO YOU KNOW WHICH UNIT? THE CONWAYS'.
OK, WE'LL SEND SOMEONE OVER.
SHIT, AND THERE I WAS THINKIN' I'D GET SOME PAPERWORK DONE TONIGHT.
HEY, COULD YOU AND YOUR WIFE ARGUE A LITTLE MORE QUIETLY? YEAH, WE'LL WORK ON IT.
WHAT WAS THAT CALL JUST NOW? UH, SOME WOMAN SAYS SHE HEARD A FIGHT NEXT DOOR, AND THEN A SCREAM, AND THEN NOTHING.
DID I HEAR THE NAME CONWAY? YEAH.
THEY IN WOOD GLEN, UH, UNIT 402? AS A MATTER OF FACT YOU KNOW 'EM? I DON'T THINK SO.
WAIT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? I'M ON IT.
I WANT TO SEE WHAT THIS GUY LOOKS LIKE.
WHAT IS IT WITH YOU? YOUR SHIFT ENDED OVER AN HOUR AGO.
YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE GOING ON VACATION TOMORROW WITH YOUR WIFE.
I SAID I WAS GOING FISHING.
I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT TAKING MY WIFE.
SHIT! OPEN UP.
POLICE DEPARTMENT.
UH, I'LL BE THERE IN A MINUTE.
I'M OFFICER FINE.
I, UH-- GOT A CALL FROM ONE OF YOUR NEIGHBORS.
THEY SAID THEY HEARD A SCREAM.
MIND IF I COME IN? NO, NOT AT ALL.
A SCREAM? REALLY? IS YOUR WIFE HERE? NO.
SHE LEFT ACTUALLY, FOR GOOD.
WE HAD AN ARGUMENT.
I GUESS THAT'S WHAT MY NEIGHBOR-- WHICH NEIGHBOR DID YOU SAY IT WAS? I DIDN'T.
DID SHE GO TO A FRIEND'S HOUSE, SOME PLACE WHERE WE CAN REACH HER? ACTUALLY, SHE'S ON HER WAY TO CHICAGO.
CHICAGO? YEAH.
SHE HAS FAMILY THERE.
LOOK, OFFICER, YOU KNOW HOW IT IS.
WE HAD A FIGHT, IT GOT LOUD, SHE PACKED HER BAG, AND SHE LEFT.
WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH THIS? OH, I, UM, CUT MYSELF SHAVING.
MM-HMM.
MIND IF I LOOK AROUND? NO, NOT AT ALL.
IT'S, UH, IT'S LIKE I SAID.
I CUT MYSELF SHAVING.
WE KEEP THE TOWELS IN THE TRUNK.
RIGHT.
MARYSVILLE HIGH.
YOU GO TO HIGH SCHOOL AROUND HERE? UH, NO, I DIDN'T.
DID YOUR WIFE? NO.
WE MOVED HERE FROM CHICAGO ABOUT 5 YEARS AGO.
THANKS.
INTO BUBBLE BATHS, ARE YOU? YEAH, YOU'D, UH, YOU'D BE AMAZED HOW RELAXING THEY ARE.
ESPECIALLY, AFTER A LONG DAY.
SO, WHEN YOUR WIFE GETS TO CHICAGO, I'D LIKE YOU TO HAVE HER GIVE US A CALL.
I'LL DO THAT, OFFICER, THE MINUTE I HEAR FROM HER.
THANKS FOR TALKING TO US.
OH, UH, WHEN THE OTHER GUYS GET HERE-- OTHER GUYS? YEAH, STANDARD PROCEDURE BULLSHIT.
JUST TELL THEM, I WAS HERE ALREADY.
AND OF COURSE, THEY'LL PROBABLY WANT TO LOOK AROUND FOR THEMSELVES.
THAT'S WHAT WE PAY 'EM FOR.
IT'S BEEN NICE TALKING TO YOU.
LOOKS LIKE YOU'LL BE MAKING THAT TRIP TO CHICAGO AFTER ALL, HONEY.
PASSENGER STEVE CLARK PASSENGER STEVE CLARK PLEASE COME TO THE BAGGAGE AREA.
HERE YOU GO, SIR.
HI.
CAN I HELP YOU, SIR? YEAH.
I WANT TO BOOK THIS THROUGH TO CHICAGO.
FILL THIS OUT FOR ME, PLEASE.
TRAIN NUMBER 311 FROM NEW YORK CITY NOW ARRIVING AT PLATFORM SIX.
TRAIN NUMBER 311 FROM NEW YORK CITY NOW ARRIVING AT PLATFORM SIX.
ALL DONE? YES.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
SHOW THAT WHEN YOU GET TO CHICAGO, AND YOU'RE ALL SET.
YOU HAVE A NICE TRIP, SIR.
THANK YOU.
OK, BYE-BYE.
MR.
CONWAY.
OFFICER FINE.
I WAS AT YOUR APARTMENT EARLIER THIS EVENING.
OH, RIGHT.
I DIDN'T RECOGNIZE YOU.
THAT'S THE POINT.
DOING A LITTLE PLAINCLOTHES WORK.
YOU, UH, GOING SOMEWHERE? YEAH.
I, UM-- HEY, MISTER! MISTER, THAT TRUNK YOU'RE TAKING TO CHICAGO, YOU FORGOT TO FILL OUT YOUR NAME AND ADDRESS.
AND, I TELL YOU, IF THESE THINGS GET LOST, THEY GET LOST FOR GOOD.
THERE'S NO WAY TO TRACE IT BACK TO YOU.
HERE YOU GO.
THANK YOU.
YOU KNOW, IT'S A FUNNY THING, OFFICER, BUT JUST AFTER YOU LEFT, UH, MY WIFE CALLED, AND SHE GOT TO CHICAGO, AND WE MADE UP, SO NOW I'M GOING TO CHICAGO TO MEET HER.
OH, LIKE A SECOND HONEYMOON.
RIGHT.
THAT'S NICE.
MIGHT WANT TO THINK ABOUT BOARDING NOW, SIR.
YOUR TRAIN'S GONNA LEAVE AS SOON AS I GET THESE BAGS ON.
YOU KNOW, HE'S RIGHT.
RIGHT.
HEY, COME ON.
I'LL WALK YOU.
GET A SEAT NEAR THE BACK OF THE CAR.
GIVE MY BEST TO CHICAGO, HUH? YEAH.
SHIT.
STUPID SON OF A BITCH.
TRAIN GETS INTO CHICAGO AROUND 6 A.
M IF WE'RE LUCKY.
LONG TIME NO SEE, HUH? YOU'RE GOING TO CHICAGO? YUP.
A CASE I'M WORKING ON.
I CAN'T REALLY TALK ABOUT IT.
I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW MUCH I LIKE HAPPY ENDINGS.
I MEAN, IN MY LINE OF WORK, THINGS DON'T ALWAYS TURN OUT SO GOOD.
YOU'RE A VERY LUCKY MAN.
WHAT DID YOU AND YOUR WIFE FIGHT ABOUT IN THE FIRST PLACE? OH, UM, SHE SAID I WASN'T PAYING ENOUGH ATTENTION TO HER.
IS THAT RIGHT? HMM.
MY WIFE'S THE EXACT OPPOSITE.
THINKS I PAY TOO MUCH ATTENTION TO HER.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? WELL, THAT'S NICE IF YOU HAVE THE TIME.
WELL, YOU GOTTA MAKE THE TIME.
THING IS, WHAT'S A GUY SUPPOSED TO DO WHEN HIS LADY JUST ISN'T INTERESTED? I DON'T KNOW.
WHAT DO YOU DO? I'M ASKING YOU.
I DON'T KNOW.
I MEAN, MAYBE MARRIAGE IS THE PROBLEM.
PEOPLE CAN BE TOGETHER TOO LONG, YOU KNOW? I MEAN, TAKE ME.
I'VE KNOWN MY WIFE SINCE HIGH SCHOOL.
CAN I ASK YOU A PERSONAL QUESTION? YOU DON'T HAVE TO ANSWER IF YOU DON'T WANT TO.
IT'S NOT LIKE YOU'RE UNDER OATH OR ANYTHING.
OH, SURE.
LET'S SAY YOU'RE GOING TO MURDER YOUR WIFE.
HOW WOULD YOU DO IT? I'M NOT A MURDERER.
OH, COME ON.
YOU TELLIN' ME YOU NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT KILLING YOUR WIFE? WE ALL HAVE.
HEY, LIGHTEN UP, WILL YA? I TELL YOU WHAT.
I'M GOING TO TELL YOU HOW YOU'D KILL YOUR WIFE, OK? YOU DON'T LOOK LIKE A SHOOTER, AND YOU'RE NOT THE STABBING TYPE.
IT'S A BAD IDEA, ANYWAY FROM A COP'S POINT OF VIEW.
I MEAN, THAT BLOOD JUST SPATTERS IN ALL THE STRANGEST PLACES.
PLACES YOU WOULDN'T EVEN THINK OF WHEN YOU'RE TRYING TO CLEAN UP AFTERWARDS.
LOOK, I--I LOVE MY WIFE.
I GOT IT.
I THINK YOU'D STRANGLE YOUR WIFE WITH YOUR BARE HANDS, MAYBE AAH! IN A MOMENT OF RAGE.
AM I GETTING WARM? AAH! YOU KNOW, I HAVEN'T HAD ANYTHING TO EAT TODAY, SO IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME.
I'LL KEEP AN EYE ON YOUR SEAT FOR YA.
BOY, THAT LOOKS GOOD.
WHAT IS THAT, MEAT LOAF? YOU KNOW? IT'S FUNNY.
BUT WHEN YOU SAID YOU WERE GONNA GET SOMETHING TO EAT, I GOT HUNGRY, WHICH IS WEIRD BECAUSE I USUALLY GET TRAVEL SICK.
YOU KNOW, I END UP THROWING EVERYTHING UP.
THAT SMELLS SO GOOD.
YOU MIND IF I TASTE A LITTLE BIT OF IT? MMM.
THAT IS GOOD.
I THINK I'M GOING TO HAVE THAT.
UNLESS YOU'RE NOT GOING TO EAT YOURS.
HEY, THANKS.
I DON'T KNOW WHY I'M SO CHATTY WITH YOU.
IT'S STRANGE, BUT I FEEL LIKE WE HAVE A LOT IN COMMON.
WHAT'S WRONG? YOU LOOK A LITTLE PALE.
HOW MUCH OF THIS STUFF DID YOU EAT? I'M FINE.
SEE THAT GUY BACK THERE? NOW, DOES HE SEEM LIKE THE KIND OF GUY WHO'S RUNNING $5 MILLION WORTH OF DRUGS? DRUGS? YOU SEE, THE AIRLINES AIN'T SAFE ANYMORE.
YOU KNOW, THEY GOT THE METAL DETECTORS AND SHIT.
SO NOW THESE GUYS, THEY'RE RUNNING DRUGS ON THE RAILS.
THAT GUY, THIS TRAIN, THAT'S THE CASE I'M WORKING ON.
REALLY? THAT'S WHAT YOU'VE BEEN WORKING ON? AMAZING, ISN'T IT? NOTHING'S SACRED TO THEM SCUMBAGS.
WHAT'S SO FUNNY? OH, UH IT'S JUST, I MEAN, YOU KNOW, RUNNING DRUGS ON A TRAIN.
I MEAN, IT JUST SEEMS SO STUPID.
YOU KNOW, IT'S LIKE WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT IT, YOU KNOW? SO, HOW LONG YOU BEEN WORKING ON THIS? OH, A LONG TIME.
VERY LONG TIME.
BUT TODAY'S A BIG DAY.
YEAH? SEE, WHAT THAT GUY DOESN'T KNOW, IS A WHOLE BUNCH OF F.
B.
I.
AGENTS ARE GOING TO BE GETTING ON IN PEORIA.
F.
B.
I.
, REALLY? AND THEY'RE GONNA GO THROUGH THIS TRAIN INCH BY INCH BEFORE WE GET TO CHICAGO.
EVERY CAR, EVERY NOOK, EVERY CRANNY, EVERY BAG.
TOOK WEEKS JUST TO GET THE GODDAMNED SEARCH WARRANTS.
ALL THE BAGS? ALL OF THEM.
"T" MINUS 22 MINUTES AND COUNTING.
YOU KNOW, I THINK THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH THAT MEAT LOAF.
I GOT--I GOTTA GET SOME AIR.
EXCUSE ME.
YOU OK? YEAH.
IT'S LIKE I TOLD YOU.
I JUST NEEDED SOME AIR.
PEORIA.
RIGHT ON TIME.
CAN I TELL YOU SOMETHING? YOU MADE A REAL BAD MISTAKE WITH THE RING.
THE RING? THE HIGH SCHOOL RING.
I MEAN, MAYBE IT'S A LITTLE DIFFERENT FOR YOU BIG-CITY TYPES, BUT OUT HERE, HIGH-SCHOOL RINGS STILL MEAN SOMETHING.
MARYSVILLE HIGH.
CLASS OF '77.
I STILL WEAR IT WITH PRIDE.
AND WHEN I GIVE ONE OF THESE THINGS TO SOMEONE, IT MEANS SOMETHING.
YOU SEE, I THINK SOMEONE GAVE THAT RING TO YOUR WIFE.
AND I DON'T BUY FOR A SECOND THAT SHE'D LEAVE IT BEHIND.
YOU'RE THE GUY THAT'S BEEN HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH MY WIFE.
WHAT EXACTLY ARE WE GONNA FIND WHEN WE OPEN UP YOUR TRUNK? YOU'RE NOT GONNA FIND ANYTHING.
I DOUBT THAT.
GO TO HELL.
YOU WANT TO SEE WHAT'S IN MY TRUNK? COME ON.
I'LL SHOW YOU.
FINE.
THESE YOUR F.
B.
I.
GUYS? I LIED.
YOU'RE THE CASE, ASSHOLE.
OH, YEAH? WELL, I'M AFRAID I'M GOING TO HAVE TO BREAK YOUR HEART.
OOH, GO AHEAD, BREAK IT.
THAT IS YOUR TRUNK, RIGHT? YEAH, THAT'S MY TRUNK, AND THAT'S THE I.
D.
CARD I FILLED OUT.
HE SAW ME DO IT.
YOU KNOW, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID WITH THAT KEY.
OPEN IT UP.
NO PROBLEM.
THANK YOU.
THAT--THAT CAN'T BE.
DEAD BODY HACKED TO PIECES IN YOUR TRUNK.
SEEMS PRETTY CLEAR TO ME.
THAT'S NOT MY WIFE.
THIS ISN'T MY TRUNK.
I THREW MINE OFF THE TRAIN.
YOU'RE FULL OF SHIT.
I WAS WITH YOU THE WHOLE TIME.
YOU NEVER LEFT MY SIGHT.
HE'S LYING.
WHY DON'T YOU TELL HIM ABOUT THE AFFAIR YOU WERE HAVING WITH MY WIFE, AND ABOUT THE RING THAT YOU GAVE HER THAT RING UNDER YOUR BED WAS A WOMAN'S RING.
IT WAS MY WIFE'S.
MY WIFE GAVE IT TO YOUR WIFE WHEN THEY STARTED SEEING EACH OTHER.
WHAT? THAT'S MY WIFE IN YOUR TRUNK.
LIKE YOU DIDN'T KNOW.
ADMIT IT! WHEN YOU FOUND OUT YOUR WIFE WAS LEAVING YOU FOR ANOTHER WOMAN, YOU WENT BERSERK.
DECIDED TO GET SOME REVENGE.
THAT'S WHY YOU MURDERED MY WIFE, ISN'T IT? NO, THAT'S NOT TRUE! WHAT ARE YOU SAYING? THAT YOU DIDN'T KILL ANYBODY? NO, I MEAN, YES, I KILLED MY WIFE! THEN WHERE'S HER BODY? IT'S IN THE TRUNK I THREW OFF THE TRAIN.
YOU SAYING YOU KILLED THEM BOTH? NO! NO! YOU LYING SACK OF SHIT! YOU BETTER GET YOUR STORY STRAIGHT, PAL.
JURIES HAVE A HABIT OF FRYING PERJURERS, AND YOU MURDERED MY WIFE.
AND THAT'S A FACT.
NOW GET OUT OF MY SIGHT BEFORE I KILL YOU.
NO, NO! HE'S LYING! YOU SET ME UP! HE SET ME UP! HE SET ME UP! WHAT A CRAZY SON OF A BITCH.
YOU THINK MAYBE HE KILLED THEM BOTH? NAH.
HIS WIFE LEFT HIM.
SHE WAS ON A FLIGHT TO CANCUN.
WE CHECKED IT OUT THIS MORNING.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S WORSE-- FINDING OUT YOUR WIFE WAS CHEATING ON YOU OR FIND OUT SOMEONE SNUFFED HER? I TELL YOU WHAT-- THEY BOTH SUCK.
THERE'S AN EXPRESS HOME.
RUNS THROUGH HERE IN AN HOUR OR SO.
WANT US TO GET YOU A TICKET? NO, NO, NO.
I THINK I'M GONNA RENT ME A CAR.
I NEED TO TAKE SOME TIME.
ALL RIGHT.
LIFE CAN BE SUCH A GRIND.
YOU KNOW, EMMA YOU DON'T LOOK SO BAD FOR A WOMAN WHO'S BEEN HACKED UP AND THROWN OFF A TRAIN.
THAT BONNIE'S MY KIND OF GUY.
HE COMES UP WITH A PLAN, BUT IT'S ANDY WHO HAS TO HATCHET.
I GUESS IT'S TRUE WHAT THEY SAY-- BETTER DEAD THEN WED.
TIME FOR MY FINISH.
NOW, THAT'S WHAT I CALL BOMBING.
TAKE MY LIFEPLEASE!
SHE TOLD ME SHE THOUGHT SHE'D LOOK GOOD IN SOMETHING LONG AND FLOWING SO I THREW HER IN THE MISSISSIPPI.
AND HOW 'BOUT THAT ERNEST HEMINGWAY? ALWAYS SHOOTING HIS MOUTH OFF.
HELLO? ANYBODY? I KNOW YOU'RE OUT THERE, FOLKS.
I CAN HEAR YOU BLEEDING.
IS THIS ON? HMM.
I KNOW WHAT THIS CROWD WANTS.
A LITTLE SLAY ON WORDS.
MAYBE A COUPLE OF NASTY FRIGHT GAGS? GET A LIFE! SOMETHING ALONG THE LINES OF TONIGHT'S NASTY NUGGET.
IT'S A LITTLE TALE ABOUT MARRIAGE, OR IF YOU PREFER, ABOUT WIFE AND DEATH.
I CALL IT TWO FOR THE SHOW.
SO I GET UP, AND I SAY, "HEY, SCREW MAKIN' A LOT OF STUPID PRODUCT IMPROVEMENTS THAT NOBODY CARES ABOUT.
" YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING HERE? I MEAN, WHY SPEND ALL THAT MONEY WHEN FOR NOTHING, WE CAN FIND WAYS TO SELL WHAT'S THERE TO ALL THOSE MARKETS THAT NEVER THOUGHT OF BUYING OUR STUFF IN THE FIRST PLACE.
I MEAN, THAT IS BRILLIANT.
AND STILL, I'M CATCHING FLAK FROM MORONS LIKE-- LIKE QUIMBY.
I MEAN, THIS DICKHEAD THINKS THAT JUST BECAUSE HE WENT AND COMMISSIONED SOME GODDAMN FEASIBILITIES STUDY THAT EVERYONE SHOULD BACK OFF, YOU KNOW? I MEAN, LIKE THE WHOLE THING WAS HIS IDEA IN THE FIRST PLACE.
I MEAN, CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS GUY? SO, ANYWAY, I SAID TO QUIMBY, "LOOK, YOU ASSHOLE, "I'M GONNA FIGHT YOU ON THIS.
"I'M GONNA FIGHT YOU ALL THE WAY "TO THE GODDAMN BOARD OF DIRECTORS.
IF I HAVE TO.
" AND YOU KNOW WHAT HE SAID? HE SAID, "I DON'T CARE.
" SO I SAID TO HIM, "OK, FINE, PAL.
"BE THAT WAY, 'CAUSE ONE OF THESE DAYS "I'M GONNA BE A VICE PRESIDENT, "AND WHEN THAT DAY COMES, I'M GONNA SQUASH YOU LIKE THE INSECT THAT YOU ARE.
" MMM.
THIS IS REALLY GOOD.
YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN THE LOOK ON HIS FACE.
AND THEN--OH, OH, I FORGOT TO TELL YOU.
THERE'S A BIG COCKTAIL PARTY SUNDAY AFTERNOON.
I KNOW, I KNOW.
YOU HATE THESE WEEKEND THINGS, BUT THIS ONE IS REALLY IMPORTANT.
I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY TO YOU, ANDY.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT? I-I'D LIKE YOU TO TRY HARDER TO BE MORE SOCIAL.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? IT'S NOT ABOUT LIKING PEOPLE OR NOT LIKING PEOPLE.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? I'M LEAVING YOU, ANDY.
YOU KNOW, IF YOU WANT.
I'LL EVEN-- I'LL MAKE A LIST OF THINGS FOR YOU TO TALK ABOUT.
THAT WAY YOU WON'T--WHAT? I SAID, "I'M LEAVING YOU.
" I WANT A DIVORCE.
YOU WHAT? ALL YOU CARE ABOUT ANYMORE IS WORK.
I WANT PASSION, I WANT HOT SEX ON A WHITE SAND BEACH, I WANT TO HAVE A LITTLE FUN AND ADVENTURE WHILE I'M STILL YOUNG ENOUGH TO ENJOY IT.
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
WHAT'S THIS REALLY ABOUT? WHAT? YOU WANT ME TO INCREASE YOUR ALLOWANCE? IS THAT IT? I DON'T WANT MONEY, ANDY! I WANT OUT! IF YOU WANT TO KNOW THE TRUTH I'VE BEEN HAVING AN AFFAIR.
AN AFFAIR.
I'M IN LOVE, AND I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW GREAT IT FEELS.
WE'RE RUNNING AWAY TOGETHER, AND THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT.
WHO IS HE? IT'S NOBODY YOU KNOW.
I WANT THE NAME.
WHY? WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO? SQUASH HIM LIKE AN INSECT? YOU'RE NOT THE MAN I MARRIED, ANDY, AND IF YOU ARE, I DIDN'T KNOW IT.
EITHER WAY, THE THOUGHT OF SPENDING THE REST OF MY LIFE WITH YOU IS JUST TOO DAMN DEPRESSING.
IF ANYBODY WANTS ME, I'LL BE IN CHICAGO.
OK, OK, YOU'RE SERIOUS.
I CAN SEE THAT NOW.
BUT--BUT LOOK, YOU'VE GOT TO WORK WITH ME ON THIS, OK? I'M NOT NEGOTIATING WITH YOU, ANDY.
I DON'T WANT ANYTHING EXCEPT A LIFE.
SO WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? YOU'RE JUST GOING TO WALK OUT ON ME? THE WAY I SEE IT, ANDY, YOU WALKED OUT ON ME YEARS AGO.
WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME WE MADE LOVE? CAN YOU EVEN REMEMBER? DON'T DO THIS TO ME, EMMA.
YOU KNOW WHAT KINDA SCHMUCK I'M GONNA LOOK LIKE? THAT'S WHAT REALLY BOTHERS YOU, ISN'T IT? WELL, LET ME PUT YOUR MIND TO REST.
YOU ALREADY LOOK LIKE A SCHMUCK.
BECAUSE YOU ARE A SCHMUCK.
AAHH! SCHMUCK? WHO'S A SCHMUCK, HUH? GOOD, BITCH.
YOU WANT PASSION, EMMA? HOW'S THIS? DAMN BITCH.
COME HERE! POLICE DEPARTMENT.
ARE YOU SURE IT WAS A SCREAM? THAT'S RIGHT.
YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT.
YOU KNOW WHAT? I DON'T CARE ANYMORE, AND I'M TIRED OF TALKIN'-- TO HELL WITH ME? NO, TO HELL WITH YOU! RIGHT, BUT YOU'RE SURE IT WAS A SCREAM? MM-HMM.
YOU SAY THE WOOD GLEN APARTMENTS.
DO YOU KNOW WHICH UNIT? THE CONWAYS'.
OK, WE'LL SEND SOMEONE OVER.
SHIT, AND THERE I WAS THINKIN' I'D GET SOME PAPERWORK DONE TONIGHT.
HEY, COULD YOU AND YOUR WIFE ARGUE A LITTLE MORE QUIETLY? YEAH, WE'LL WORK ON IT.
WHAT WAS THAT CALL JUST NOW? UH, SOME WOMAN SAYS SHE HEARD A FIGHT NEXT DOOR, AND THEN A SCREAM, AND THEN NOTHING.
DID I HEAR THE NAME CONWAY? YEAH.
THEY IN WOOD GLEN, UH, UNIT 402? AS A MATTER OF FACT YOU KNOW 'EM? I DON'T THINK SO.
WAIT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? I'M ON IT.
I WANT TO SEE WHAT THIS GUY LOOKS LIKE.
WHAT IS IT WITH YOU? YOUR SHIFT ENDED OVER AN HOUR AGO.
YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE GOING ON VACATION TOMORROW WITH YOUR WIFE.
I SAID I WAS GOING FISHING.
I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT TAKING MY WIFE.
SHIT! OPEN UP.
POLICE DEPARTMENT.
UH, I'LL BE THERE IN A MINUTE.
I'M OFFICER FINE.
I, UH-- GOT A CALL FROM ONE OF YOUR NEIGHBORS.
THEY SAID THEY HEARD A SCREAM.
MIND IF I COME IN? NO, NOT AT ALL.
A SCREAM? REALLY? IS YOUR WIFE HERE? NO.
SHE LEFT ACTUALLY, FOR GOOD.
WE HAD AN ARGUMENT.
I GUESS THAT'S WHAT MY NEIGHBOR-- WHICH NEIGHBOR DID YOU SAY IT WAS? I DIDN'T.
DID SHE GO TO A FRIEND'S HOUSE, SOME PLACE WHERE WE CAN REACH HER? ACTUALLY, SHE'S ON HER WAY TO CHICAGO.
CHICAGO? YEAH.
SHE HAS FAMILY THERE.
LOOK, OFFICER, YOU KNOW HOW IT IS.
WE HAD A FIGHT, IT GOT LOUD, SHE PACKED HER BAG, AND SHE LEFT.
WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH THIS? OH, I, UM, CUT MYSELF SHAVING.
MM-HMM.
MIND IF I LOOK AROUND? NO, NOT AT ALL.
IT'S, UH, IT'S LIKE I SAID.
I CUT MYSELF SHAVING.
WE KEEP THE TOWELS IN THE TRUNK.
RIGHT.
MARYSVILLE HIGH.
YOU GO TO HIGH SCHOOL AROUND HERE? UH, NO, I DIDN'T.
DID YOUR WIFE? NO.
WE MOVED HERE FROM CHICAGO ABOUT 5 YEARS AGO.
THANKS.
INTO BUBBLE BATHS, ARE YOU? YEAH, YOU'D, UH, YOU'D BE AMAZED HOW RELAXING THEY ARE.
ESPECIALLY, AFTER A LONG DAY.
SO, WHEN YOUR WIFE GETS TO CHICAGO, I'D LIKE YOU TO HAVE HER GIVE US A CALL.
I'LL DO THAT, OFFICER, THE MINUTE I HEAR FROM HER.
THANKS FOR TALKING TO US.
OH, UH, WHEN THE OTHER GUYS GET HERE-- OTHER GUYS? YEAH, STANDARD PROCEDURE BULLSHIT.
JUST TELL THEM, I WAS HERE ALREADY.
AND OF COURSE, THEY'LL PROBABLY WANT TO LOOK AROUND FOR THEMSELVES.
THAT'S WHAT WE PAY 'EM FOR.
IT'S BEEN NICE TALKING TO YOU.
LOOKS LIKE YOU'LL BE MAKING THAT TRIP TO CHICAGO AFTER ALL, HONEY.
PASSENGER STEVE CLARK PASSENGER STEVE CLARK PLEASE COME TO THE BAGGAGE AREA.
HERE YOU GO, SIR.
HI.
CAN I HELP YOU, SIR? YEAH.
I WANT TO BOOK THIS THROUGH TO CHICAGO.
FILL THIS OUT FOR ME, PLEASE.
TRAIN NUMBER 311 FROM NEW YORK CITY NOW ARRIVING AT PLATFORM SIX.
TRAIN NUMBER 311 FROM NEW YORK CITY NOW ARRIVING AT PLATFORM SIX.
ALL DONE? YES.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
SHOW THAT WHEN YOU GET TO CHICAGO, AND YOU'RE ALL SET.
YOU HAVE A NICE TRIP, SIR.
THANK YOU.
OK, BYE-BYE.
MR.
CONWAY.
OFFICER FINE.
I WAS AT YOUR APARTMENT EARLIER THIS EVENING.
OH, RIGHT.
I DIDN'T RECOGNIZE YOU.
THAT'S THE POINT.
DOING A LITTLE PLAINCLOTHES WORK.
YOU, UH, GOING SOMEWHERE? YEAH.
I, UM-- HEY, MISTER! MISTER, THAT TRUNK YOU'RE TAKING TO CHICAGO, YOU FORGOT TO FILL OUT YOUR NAME AND ADDRESS.
AND, I TELL YOU, IF THESE THINGS GET LOST, THEY GET LOST FOR GOOD.
THERE'S NO WAY TO TRACE IT BACK TO YOU.
HERE YOU GO.
THANK YOU.
YOU KNOW, IT'S A FUNNY THING, OFFICER, BUT JUST AFTER YOU LEFT, UH, MY WIFE CALLED, AND SHE GOT TO CHICAGO, AND WE MADE UP, SO NOW I'M GOING TO CHICAGO TO MEET HER.
OH, LIKE A SECOND HONEYMOON.
RIGHT.
THAT'S NICE.
MIGHT WANT TO THINK ABOUT BOARDING NOW, SIR.
YOUR TRAIN'S GONNA LEAVE AS SOON AS I GET THESE BAGS ON.
YOU KNOW, HE'S RIGHT.
RIGHT.
HEY, COME ON.
I'LL WALK YOU.
GET A SEAT NEAR THE BACK OF THE CAR.
GIVE MY BEST TO CHICAGO, HUH? YEAH.
SHIT.
STUPID SON OF A BITCH.
TRAIN GETS INTO CHICAGO AROUND 6 A.
M IF WE'RE LUCKY.
LONG TIME NO SEE, HUH? YOU'RE GOING TO CHICAGO? YUP.
A CASE I'M WORKING ON.
I CAN'T REALLY TALK ABOUT IT.
I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW MUCH I LIKE HAPPY ENDINGS.
I MEAN, IN MY LINE OF WORK, THINGS DON'T ALWAYS TURN OUT SO GOOD.
YOU'RE A VERY LUCKY MAN.
WHAT DID YOU AND YOUR WIFE FIGHT ABOUT IN THE FIRST PLACE? OH, UM, SHE SAID I WASN'T PAYING ENOUGH ATTENTION TO HER.
IS THAT RIGHT? HMM.
MY WIFE'S THE EXACT OPPOSITE.
THINKS I PAY TOO MUCH ATTENTION TO HER.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? WELL, THAT'S NICE IF YOU HAVE THE TIME.
WELL, YOU GOTTA MAKE THE TIME.
THING IS, WHAT'S A GUY SUPPOSED TO DO WHEN HIS LADY JUST ISN'T INTERESTED? I DON'T KNOW.
WHAT DO YOU DO? I'M ASKING YOU.
I DON'T KNOW.
I MEAN, MAYBE MARRIAGE IS THE PROBLEM.
PEOPLE CAN BE TOGETHER TOO LONG, YOU KNOW? I MEAN, TAKE ME.
I'VE KNOWN MY WIFE SINCE HIGH SCHOOL.
CAN I ASK YOU A PERSONAL QUESTION? YOU DON'T HAVE TO ANSWER IF YOU DON'T WANT TO.
IT'S NOT LIKE YOU'RE UNDER OATH OR ANYTHING.
OH, SURE.
LET'S SAY YOU'RE GOING TO MURDER YOUR WIFE.
HOW WOULD YOU DO IT? I'M NOT A MURDERER.
OH, COME ON.
YOU TELLIN' ME YOU NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT KILLING YOUR WIFE? WE ALL HAVE.
HEY, LIGHTEN UP, WILL YA? I TELL YOU WHAT.
I'M GOING TO TELL YOU HOW YOU'D KILL YOUR WIFE, OK? YOU DON'T LOOK LIKE A SHOOTER, AND YOU'RE NOT THE STABBING TYPE.
IT'S A BAD IDEA, ANYWAY FROM A COP'S POINT OF VIEW.
I MEAN, THAT BLOOD JUST SPATTERS IN ALL THE STRANGEST PLACES.
PLACES YOU WOULDN'T EVEN THINK OF WHEN YOU'RE TRYING TO CLEAN UP AFTERWARDS.
LOOK, I--I LOVE MY WIFE.
I GOT IT.
I THINK YOU'D STRANGLE YOUR WIFE WITH YOUR BARE HANDS, MAYBE AAH! IN A MOMENT OF RAGE.
AM I GETTING WARM? AAH! YOU KNOW, I HAVEN'T HAD ANYTHING TO EAT TODAY, SO IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME.
I'LL KEEP AN EYE ON YOUR SEAT FOR YA.
BOY, THAT LOOKS GOOD.
WHAT IS THAT, MEAT LOAF? YOU KNOW? IT'S FUNNY.
BUT WHEN YOU SAID YOU WERE GONNA GET SOMETHING TO EAT, I GOT HUNGRY, WHICH IS WEIRD BECAUSE I USUALLY GET TRAVEL SICK.
YOU KNOW, I END UP THROWING EVERYTHING UP.
THAT SMELLS SO GOOD.
YOU MIND IF I TASTE A LITTLE BIT OF IT? MMM.
THAT IS GOOD.
I THINK I'M GOING TO HAVE THAT.
UNLESS YOU'RE NOT GOING TO EAT YOURS.
HEY, THANKS.
I DON'T KNOW WHY I'M SO CHATTY WITH YOU.
IT'S STRANGE, BUT I FEEL LIKE WE HAVE A LOT IN COMMON.
WHAT'S WRONG? YOU LOOK A LITTLE PALE.
HOW MUCH OF THIS STUFF DID YOU EAT? I'M FINE.
SEE THAT GUY BACK THERE? NOW, DOES HE SEEM LIKE THE KIND OF GUY WHO'S RUNNING $5 MILLION WORTH OF DRUGS? DRUGS? YOU SEE, THE AIRLINES AIN'T SAFE ANYMORE.
YOU KNOW, THEY GOT THE METAL DETECTORS AND SHIT.
SO NOW THESE GUYS, THEY'RE RUNNING DRUGS ON THE RAILS.
THAT GUY, THIS TRAIN, THAT'S THE CASE I'M WORKING ON.
REALLY? THAT'S WHAT YOU'VE BEEN WORKING ON? AMAZING, ISN'T IT? NOTHING'S SACRED TO THEM SCUMBAGS.
WHAT'S SO FUNNY? OH, UH IT'S JUST, I MEAN, YOU KNOW, RUNNING DRUGS ON A TRAIN.
I MEAN, IT JUST SEEMS SO STUPID.
YOU KNOW, IT'S LIKE WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT IT, YOU KNOW? SO, HOW LONG YOU BEEN WORKING ON THIS? OH, A LONG TIME.
VERY LONG TIME.
BUT TODAY'S A BIG DAY.
YEAH? SEE, WHAT THAT GUY DOESN'T KNOW, IS A WHOLE BUNCH OF F.
B.
I.
AGENTS ARE GOING TO BE GETTING ON IN PEORIA.
F.
B.
I.
, REALLY? AND THEY'RE GONNA GO THROUGH THIS TRAIN INCH BY INCH BEFORE WE GET TO CHICAGO.
EVERY CAR, EVERY NOOK, EVERY CRANNY, EVERY BAG.
TOOK WEEKS JUST TO GET THE GODDAMNED SEARCH WARRANTS.
ALL THE BAGS? ALL OF THEM.
"T" MINUS 22 MINUTES AND COUNTING.
YOU KNOW, I THINK THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH THAT MEAT LOAF.
I GOT--I GOTTA GET SOME AIR.
EXCUSE ME.
YOU OK? YEAH.
IT'S LIKE I TOLD YOU.
I JUST NEEDED SOME AIR.
PEORIA.
RIGHT ON TIME.
CAN I TELL YOU SOMETHING? YOU MADE A REAL BAD MISTAKE WITH THE RING.
THE RING? THE HIGH SCHOOL RING.
I MEAN, MAYBE IT'S A LITTLE DIFFERENT FOR YOU BIG-CITY TYPES, BUT OUT HERE, HIGH-SCHOOL RINGS STILL MEAN SOMETHING.
MARYSVILLE HIGH.
CLASS OF '77.
I STILL WEAR IT WITH PRIDE.
AND WHEN I GIVE ONE OF THESE THINGS TO SOMEONE, IT MEANS SOMETHING.
YOU SEE, I THINK SOMEONE GAVE THAT RING TO YOUR WIFE.
AND I DON'T BUY FOR A SECOND THAT SHE'D LEAVE IT BEHIND.
YOU'RE THE GUY THAT'S BEEN HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH MY WIFE.
WHAT EXACTLY ARE WE GONNA FIND WHEN WE OPEN UP YOUR TRUNK? YOU'RE NOT GONNA FIND ANYTHING.
I DOUBT THAT.
GO TO HELL.
YOU WANT TO SEE WHAT'S IN MY TRUNK? COME ON.
I'LL SHOW YOU.
FINE.
THESE YOUR F.
B.
I.
GUYS? I LIED.
YOU'RE THE CASE, ASSHOLE.
OH, YEAH? WELL, I'M AFRAID I'M GOING TO HAVE TO BREAK YOUR HEART.
OOH, GO AHEAD, BREAK IT.
THAT IS YOUR TRUNK, RIGHT? YEAH, THAT'S MY TRUNK, AND THAT'S THE I.
D.
CARD I FILLED OUT.
HE SAW ME DO IT.
YOU KNOW, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID WITH THAT KEY.
OPEN IT UP.
NO PROBLEM.
THANK YOU.
THAT--THAT CAN'T BE.
DEAD BODY HACKED TO PIECES IN YOUR TRUNK.
SEEMS PRETTY CLEAR TO ME.
THAT'S NOT MY WIFE.
THIS ISN'T MY TRUNK.
I THREW MINE OFF THE TRAIN.
YOU'RE FULL OF SHIT.
I WAS WITH YOU THE WHOLE TIME.
YOU NEVER LEFT MY SIGHT.
HE'S LYING.
WHY DON'T YOU TELL HIM ABOUT THE AFFAIR YOU WERE HAVING WITH MY WIFE, AND ABOUT THE RING THAT YOU GAVE HER THAT RING UNDER YOUR BED WAS A WOMAN'S RING.
IT WAS MY WIFE'S.
MY WIFE GAVE IT TO YOUR WIFE WHEN THEY STARTED SEEING EACH OTHER.
WHAT? THAT'S MY WIFE IN YOUR TRUNK.
LIKE YOU DIDN'T KNOW.
ADMIT IT! WHEN YOU FOUND OUT YOUR WIFE WAS LEAVING YOU FOR ANOTHER WOMAN, YOU WENT BERSERK.
DECIDED TO GET SOME REVENGE.
THAT'S WHY YOU MURDERED MY WIFE, ISN'T IT? NO, THAT'S NOT TRUE! WHAT ARE YOU SAYING? THAT YOU DIDN'T KILL ANYBODY? NO, I MEAN, YES, I KILLED MY WIFE! THEN WHERE'S HER BODY? IT'S IN THE TRUNK I THREW OFF THE TRAIN.
YOU SAYING YOU KILLED THEM BOTH? NO! NO! YOU LYING SACK OF SHIT! YOU BETTER GET YOUR STORY STRAIGHT, PAL.
JURIES HAVE A HABIT OF FRYING PERJURERS, AND YOU MURDERED MY WIFE.
AND THAT'S A FACT.
NOW GET OUT OF MY SIGHT BEFORE I KILL YOU.
NO, NO! HE'S LYING! YOU SET ME UP! HE SET ME UP! HE SET ME UP! WHAT A CRAZY SON OF A BITCH.
YOU THINK MAYBE HE KILLED THEM BOTH? NAH.
HIS WIFE LEFT HIM.
SHE WAS ON A FLIGHT TO CANCUN.
WE CHECKED IT OUT THIS MORNING.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S WORSE-- FINDING OUT YOUR WIFE WAS CHEATING ON YOU OR FIND OUT SOMEONE SNUFFED HER? I TELL YOU WHAT-- THEY BOTH SUCK.
THERE'S AN EXPRESS HOME.
RUNS THROUGH HERE IN AN HOUR OR SO.
WANT US TO GET YOU A TICKET? NO, NO, NO.
I THINK I'M GONNA RENT ME A CAR.
I NEED TO TAKE SOME TIME.
ALL RIGHT.
LIFE CAN BE SUCH A GRIND.
YOU KNOW, EMMA YOU DON'T LOOK SO BAD FOR A WOMAN WHO'S BEEN HACKED UP AND THROWN OFF A TRAIN.
THAT BONNIE'S MY KIND OF GUY.
HE COMES UP WITH A PLAN, BUT IT'S ANDY WHO HAS TO HATCHET.
I GUESS IT'S TRUE WHAT THEY SAY-- BETTER DEAD THEN WED.
TIME FOR MY FINISH.
NOW, THAT'S WHAT I CALL BOMBING.
TAKE MY LIFEPLEASE!