The Magicians (2016) s05e06 Episode Script
Oops!... I Did It Again
1 Previously on "The Magicians" You're not right, El, and we both know why.
You said you don't remember what happened when you were possessed, but Julia does.
And I don't.
I don't know why you're accusing me of lying.
[WHISPERING.]
Eliot, let me out.
We're looking for Stoppard.
Mom? Mom, what's wrong? Moms die every day.
Circle of life.
We know you're trying to look out for your mom.
You're saying you'll leave? Sorry, man.
I'm not going anywhere.
The Harmonic Convergence.
AKA the end of the world.
The convergence will only occur during this perfect alignment.
If we move the moon out of position No Convergence, no Circumstance, no apocalypse.
If you have moon brain, then you will see Her aura.
If it is green, She is listening.
Only then may you ask Her to move.
You will need a piece of Her.
Like a moon rock? In here, boss.
Ladies.
- You're moving the moon? - Yeah.
[BOTH SHOUTING.]
[EXPLOSION.]
Uh, guys? I think we broke the moon.
NASA estimates just hours before the first pieces reach our atmosphere.
In a tweet, the president stressed the need for calm, saying, "We will fix the moon decisively.
The American people have absolutely nothing to fear.
" [BELL DINGS.]
I know we are dealing with the lunapocalypse problem, but I have to insist that we all take a minute for a little self-care/pizza, okay? Okay.
Cautioning everyone that though the world appears to be coming to an end, everyone's behavior will still be counted when the time comes for judgment.
Feeling the wrong kind of boned right now.
At least the Harmonic Convergence isn't happening anymore.
[INHALES, EXHALES DEEPLY.]
I just have this bad feeling.
Hey.
We'll figure out how to stop this.
I mean, on the off-chance the president doesn't.
Let's review.
Emergency code words if this all goes shit-shaped? Um - Really? - Kidding.
Okay.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
As follows.
"Credenza," no questions asked.
"Inglenook," tie those fools up, toss 'em through the Fillory portal.
"Chifforobe," flee to Canada.
"Armoire," shield up, stat.
"Kimono" BOTH: All hell has broken loose.
Time and hope are quickly running out.
Everything I'm seeing says the first chunk's gonna hit around 10:00 p.
m.
We have 12 hours.
[BOWL CLATTERS.]
Uh, look.
What if we created a massive portal in the atmosphere? No, we need a specialist, and the meta-math is just it's too this is really bad, Julia.
Nuh-uh.
Don't you dare give up.
- [SNEEZES.]
- This math is so damn frustrating.
Yeah, but you'll get it.
Jesus.
- What happened to your shoe? - Have you been out there? It is the literal end of the actual world.
No, it's not.
We're gonna stop it.
Yeah, tell that to the rioters and the prayer circles and people fucking in the streets.
I can't believe this is happening.
I'm just numb.
Try the truffled prosciutto, it's incredible.
I did have one idea after my very bad idea to take the subway.
Okay, do you know Richard's Reverse Entropy spell? We already talked about it.
Unfortunately, it's just way too small.
True, but I reworked it.
And check my math.
[MUTTERS.]
This is fantastic, but I don't think we have enough cooperative power.
Chances are high for a surge in the next 12 hours.
- We could use it.
- And we have enough hedges around the world on standby to do it with us, so That might not be enough.
We make it enough.
Today we are saving the world, and this time it's gonna stick.
Damn right, we are.
Okay.
[SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE.]
But just in case Anything I need to say to you? Jules, we're good.
[INDISTINCT SPEECH ON TV.]
[SMOOCHES.]
Scientists around the world have been sending out their predictions for what we should expect in the coming hours.
Though the tides remain mysteriously intact, expect volcanic activity, tectonic shifts, disrupted weather patterns, and strange behavior from animal life.
[DRAMATIC MUSIC.]
And to Sharon Cappanelli from ninth grade: I lied.
It was my tampon, and that was your girlfriend.
I'm not sorry.
Thanks for spreading the word, Pete.
Stand by.
[SIREN WAILING.]
Everyone's set.
We're just waiting for the surge.
[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC.]
You guys feel that? It's the surge.
It's cresting.
We should Go.
Pete, now! Did it work? [SIREN WAILING.]
It didn't work.
We failed.
[EXPLOSIONS.]
[EERIE MUSIC.]
[EXPLOSION.]
[BELL DINGS.]
[INHALES, EXHALES DEEPLY.]
Feeling the wrong kind of boned right now.
At least the Harmonic Convergence isn't happening anymore.
Although the world's greatest minds are locked in a desperate race to save humanity from this sudden lunar cataclysm, time and hope are quickly running out.
Everything I'm seeing says the first chunk's gonna hit around 10:00 p.
m.
We have 12 hours.
[SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE.]
Uh, look, what if we created a massive portal in the atmosphere? We need a specialist, and the meta-math is just it's too - this is really bad, Julia.
- Am I crazy, or This already happened, right? - [SNEEZES.]
- This math is so damn frustrating.
This did.
This did already happen.
[GASPS.]
Ow! Not a dream.
Hey, am I on something, or did we try this plan yesterday? We're At Westbrook's estate? [FOOTSTEPS.]
Jesus.
- [LAUGHS.]
- What happened to your shoe? Have you been out there? It's the literal end of the actual world.
No, it's not.
We're stopping it.
Tell that to the rioters, prayer circles, and people fucking in the streets.
BOTH: We're in a time loop.
Excuse us while we briefly sidebar.
Why exactly is this happening? "Why is anything?" he asked, still freaked, 'cause the last thing he remembers is all of Earth ending.
- It felt so inevitable.
- I know.
But why us, now? Time loop? Of course we're the chosen ones.
We're us.
Okay, everybody.
What is going on with you two? Quick recap, Kady's plan won't work.
We tried it, and the moon still crashed into the Earth.
Uh, okay.
What do you mean, "tried it"? We suspect we're in a time loop.
How? Obviously the moon's a wily cunt who doesn't wanna die.
Okay.
All right, so no reverse entropy.
What do you guys suggest? We cast Vinnola's Oxygen Saver on Penny 23, then he travels to the moon.
It's easier to do a portal there.
Look, GPS is kinda broken.
- I might end up in a wall.
- It's the apocalypse.
Gonna need you to try.
[SOFT MUSIC.]
Fuck all of you.
Fine.
[INHALES, SIGHS.]
[UPBEAT MUSIC.]
You got this, man.
[INHALES DEEPLY.]
- [CRUNCH.]
- Oh oh, no! No! No! [ALL EXCLAIMING.]
[THUD.]
[GROANS.]
[EXPLOSIONS.]
[BELL DINGS.]
Okay, forget the moon.
Let's move the Earth.
Kady, get your hedge bitches on the horn.
- We got cooperating to do.
- I'm on it.
[EXPLOSIONS.]
- [BELL DINGS.]
- Okay.
I found a spell that can hold the pieces in suspension, we just right, good to assume we can all do sphincter magic? [EXPLOSIONS.]
[BELL DINGS.]
Could we make this very big? [EXPLOSIONS.]
- [BELL DINGS.]
- Mother-shit! You you okay? No, Julia.
I'm not okay.
Bless you.
[SNEEZES.]
Whoa.
Allow me to explain.
So here we are, eight loops in.
Ten.
If these loops sent us back even a little earlier, we could stop Marina from bad-touching this whole situation, but we can't.
Okay, so we need time magic.
I know a horomancer who builds machines.
- Maybe he has something.
- Fantastic, vámanos.
One problem I kind of let his mom die last time I saw him.
Oh.
Oh, come on.
Like you guys are all saints? You're in a time loop? - Well, why you two? - 'Cause we're the best-looking.
Here.
This is Penny's address.
- Margo, what are you doing? - [SHUSHES.]
Favorite coffee shop, hipster club where we suspect he DJ's on the weekend, and it's your lucky day his Travelling's borked, so he's a sitting duck in a scarf.
Margo, we can't just kill Penny.
We don't; he dies anyway, along with everyone.
This is basic trolley problem shit.
Ovary up.
- Okay.
- If I wanted revenge on Penny, I would've gotten that a long time ago.
You've got particles all over you.
Were you spritzed with something? Spritzed, like with what? Something that nebulized a cloud of temporal permanence around you? [CLICKS TONGUE.]
Mm.
BOTH: "Permanence.
" For men and women.
Yeah, I may have accidentally stolen a weird perfume bottle from a time witch in Fillory.
Okay, whatever you really did, it's created a field around you both that would explain why you're in a time loop.
Ah.
And here we thought we were special.
- What are you doing? - Helping.
You said it's the end of the world, right? - That is right.
- I think I can hop you guys back a full 48 hours so you can prevent this.
Oh, really? Just like that? Well, it's really goddamn complicated, but I'm a genius.
- Oh.
- Oh.
Here we go.
[DEVICE CLICKING.]
Are we time traveling right now? The hell? What's wrong? [GROANS.]
Nothing's working at all.
- Are you saying your shit's broken? - I hope so.
The alternative is all time magic's in some kind of lockdown.
What could even do that? Something powerful and ancient.
You mean like the moon? Maybe if I just fix this and bypass the oscillation Hey, no rush, but in 30 seconds, we're all gonna die.
This'll get you there.
Not in one piece, but Wait, what? [DEVICE CLICKS.]
Shit.
- I'm sorry.
- Oh, well.
[EXPLOSIONS.]
[BELL DINGS.]
I cannot believe we didn't consider going to Jane Chatwin first.
Well, she is a person that may be upset with us.
Yes.
- No.
- Huh.
Time magic's locked down, and the portal to Fillory's blocked.
This smacks of a not-so-random coincidence.
[EMERGENCY SIRENS WAILING.]
Okay.
We can still get there.
Penny can't do shit.
What about that other Traveller dickbucket, - Gavin what's-his-name? - Everything I'm seeing says the first chunk's gonna hit around 10:00 p.
m.
TOGETHER: We know! 12 hours.
We're seeing this wrong.
We're missing something.
Uh, maybe we need to take a step back.
Start thinking outside the box.
- What do you suggest? - Remember Professor Soto? - Oh, the one with the pants? - Yeah.
He had that ridiculous test everyone thought was impossible.
That we solved because we rule.
- Solved how? - You want me to remember a solution I came up with at a rager doing upside-down shots in a fur bikini? You say rager, I say problem-solving session.
That's how we do: we put our minds on something different and we catch the solution out of the corner of our eye.
So is this actually a plan or do you just wanna blow off steam? Two birds, Bambi.
Besides, we're stuck in a game that keeps hitting reset.
Infinite time, zero consequences.
Just you and me saving the world through unbridled hedonism.
Mm, fun.
Let's do it.
[KNOCK AT DOOR.]
[WHISPERING.]
Eliot.
[KNOCKING.]
- Hey.
- Uh, hey.
Did someone just knock on the door? No.
We going? Yeah.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
Okay, miscreants.
It's Armageddon.
So die as you lived - Boring.
- Or join us in an end-of-the-world soiree and die legends.
Your choice.
You heard the man.
[ROWDY MUSIC.]
[CLAPS.]
Come on! It's a tie! Anything? Not yet! [LAUGHS.]
- Oh! - [LAUGHS.]
- [SCREAMS.]
- [ROWDY SCREAMING.]
[BELL DINGS.]
- [REPTILE ROOM'S "CONTROL".]
- Gimme your control Gimme your control Mmm.
[WHISPERING.]
Eliot! [MUSIC FADES.]
El, El.
You look like you saw a ghost.
Hey, ask it how we stop the moon.
- Actually, I think I might - Wait! Oh, my God, I think I got something.
An idea.
Hit me.
[LAUGHS.]
Cock and balls, I forgot.
- [CHUCKLES QUIETLY.]
- [LAUGHS LOUDLY.]
[BELL DINGS.]
[DUBSTEP MUSIC.]
This isn't working.
No offense, Rajit.
- It's Todd.
- [LAUGHS.]
No.
Come back when you're Rajit.
Okay.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
You know, I've been thinking clearly we need something a little bit stronger.
No, we need an idea.
You know what? I'm gonna go hydrate and, I don't know stare at moon chunks hurtling straight for Earth.
Can't be worse than discovering I just jacked Todd off for three time loops in a row.
[LAUGHS.]
Eliot.
No [QUIETLY.]
It's never happening.
[LOUDLY.]
Leave me alone.
[BELL DINGS.]
I never, never, never, get so close It's under control I'm reachin' the end of a hallway I never, never, never - Been so out my body - [KNOCKING.]
[MUSIC FADES.]
[KNOCKING CONTINUES.]
[KNOCKING CONTINUES.]
I can walk away from you all fucking day! [BELL DINGS.]
Pardon me, Brenda.
I'm gonna get this.
[DREAMY DANCE MUSIC.]
[INHALES DEEPLY.]
I got a lead.
I've been talking to this weird oceanographer guy who no joke has a dolphin harem, but he also knows some real shit about Hey, what's up with you? What's up is my brain is a snake eating its tail, and the tail is another snake eating its tail.
Jesus.
Okay, you stay here.
I'll report back with some research.
[BELL DINGS.]
[BREATHING HARD.]
[EERILY MUFFLED.]
I figured it out, El.
From talking to that dolphin fucker.
Everything he said checked out.
We need to go to Fisher Beach.
It's kind of out of the way.
Lifeguard station 17.
Everything I'm seeing says the first chunk's - gonna hit around 10:00 p.
m - Eliot.
- We have 12 hours.
- Hey.
I got the answer.
You can take a breather.
Not right now, Margo.
Okay, "Leaving Las Vegas.
" I was happy to give you space to tell your Monster secrets in your own time, but we're stuck in the Jean-Paul Sartre bullshit and you're getting worse fast.
I told you, this isn't important right now, okay? Whatever it is, you remember it's not your fault, okay? This math is so damn frustrating.
Can we just stop the moon first, please? Not if your liver falls out of your twat first.
Let's talk about it.
- No.
- Seems like we have to.
It's me.
- Don't be a coward.
- Stop.
[INHALES DEEPLY.]
It's still in me, okay? [SOFT DRAMATIC MUSIC.]
[INHALES DEEPLY.]
I am seeing what I am seeing.
Some pieces of him must've held on.
The Monster is gone.
I exorcised it and Q threw it into the Seam.
The only thing here is you medicating instead of facing your memories and your feelings and I empathize, I do.
But I think you're forgetting you can tell me anything.
I just told you, and you didn't believe me.
I love you.
Even when you're nuts.
But our window's 12 hours to stop the moon or it's game over again, and I need it to be fixed before I go as nuts as you, so just sit this round out - No.
- And I'll go alone.
No, no, no.
Please, please.
I can - You can't.
- Keep it together, I can keep it together.
- See you yesterday.
- I can keep it together.
Please.
No, Margo.
[SOMBER MUSIC.]
[DUBSTEP MUSIC.]
[BELL DINGS.]
[INHALES, EXHALES.]
I'm feeling the wrong kind of boned right now.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
What you said yesterday Yesterday at Westbrook's house? [DISTANT COMMOTION.]
Yesterday before you went to Fisher Beach.
I didn't go to Fisher Beach.
- You don't - At around 10 p.
m.
- We have 12 hours.
- You don't remember.
Remember that tit-chafe Marina showed up and broke the moon? - How could I forget? - [SNEEZES.]
Did Josh just sneeze on the pizza? [EERIE DISSONANT MUSIC.]
[BELL DINGS.]
So let's release that ache, that desire for control.
Understand the moment we're in.
Accept our state of being.
Take a breath.
Send a prayer up to the god of your understanding.
Send a prayer and accept.
Amen.
- ALL: Amen.
- Thank you.
You've momentarily lessened my existential dread.
[SOFT SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC.]
[DOOR SLAMS.]
This may be the end.
No, I'm not reading this.
Okay, asshole.
Bring it.
I just wanna say This world is flawed.
We each have good in us and bad.
Every day we fight to let the good win.
This this is the last day.
Think about those who you love.
Turn off the TV and be with them.
- Thank you and good - [LAPTOP CLICKS SHUT.]
I'm sorry.
Were you listening to that? It was so depressing.
Not really.
Hey, you okay? Not really.
Me neither.
Cookie? Yeah.
[PANIC AND SIRENS WAILING.]
I have to admit I don't think their spell will work.
[CHUCKLES DRYLY.]
It won't.
Can't believe I'm about to die.
You are, but then you'll just start all over again.
We're in a time loop.
Shut up.
Seriously? That's a relief.
Like, uh, "Groundhog Day"? [CHUCKLES.]
Or "Russian Doll"? Or "Happy Death Day" or "Happy Death Day 2U"? Or "Source Code"? Oh, that "X-Files".
The "Star Trek".
"Edge of Tomorrow" but really "All You Need Is Kill" and it's, like, why change the title like that, right? Wow.
You really love time loop stories, don't you? And you're awake in the loop.
You're the hero.
I am totally jealous.
[HELICOPTER BLADES WHIRRING.]
[EMERGENCY SIRENS WAILING.]
Hey, you wanna get out of here? I've got this place on my bucket list and well, uh it's gotta be now.
And to Sharon Cappanelli from ninth grade: I lied.
- Man.
- It was my tampon, - and that was your girlfriend.
- Time loops.
Gnarly.
Extremely gnarly.
So you're talking to me about it.
Yeah.
As opposed to Alice, Julia, or Kady.
Or, to state the obvious, Margo.
I kind of blew it beyond repair with Margo.
How is anything beyond repair when you're stuck in a time loop? Well, she was awake with me for a while and then she got kicked out somehow, and now I am utterly alone.
Well, if I'm learning anything from these squishy pierogi tacos is that not everything belongs together.
[POLICE SIREN WAILING.]
- How can we help? - Help save the world? [CHUCKLES.]
Honestly, I don't know.
It might not be possible.
This might be it.
Me, alone, in this particular 12 hours.
- Eternally.
- Okay.
Sounds like a lot for you.
So, uh, anything I can do to help you? [GROANS QUIETLY.]
I wish.
Because the longer this goes on, the more certain I am that the Monster is inside of me and trying to get out.
Good metaphor.
I'm being literal.
Oh.
Shit.
[EXHALES DEEPLY.]
It's worse every loop.
I hear its voice, I see blood on the walls, I I see this door.
It wants out.
Have you tried letting it out? Why in God's name would I do that? I I I'm just spitballing.
A lot of the time in these movies the solution of the problem is facing the thing you're most afraid of.
What if I die? What if you do? - [TIRES SQUEAL.]
- [MAN SCREAMS AND CAR SMASHES.]
WOMAN: Why?! Anyway.
You're not upset you're about to die? [AIR RAID SIREN WAILING.]
I don't love it.
But you'll figure out a way to fix this.
[SIREN CONTINUES WAILING.]
[BELL DINGS.]
[ECHOEY AND DISTANT.]
The world's greatest minds are locked in a desperate race to save humanity.
Everything I'm seeing says the first chunk's gotta hit around 10 p.
m.
We have 12 hours.
[BOWL CLATTERS.]
What if we create a massive portal in the atmosphere? We'd need a specialist.
[SNEEZES.]
[KNOCK AT DOOR.]
[KNOCKING CONTINUES.]
[KNOCKING.]
[BREATHING DEEPLY.]
[KNOCKING.]
[EERIE MUSIC.]
[HINGES CREAK.]
[EXHALES.]
Charlton? Well, fuck! [CHUCKLES.]
How the hell are you here? I was trapped wandering your Remembrances when mercifully you decided not to sleep for five days and broke your brain.
That gave me an opening to contact you.
That voice? That was you? [CHUCKLING.]
Yes, of course.
When all the scary creatures were pulled out, I held on tight as I could in your Happy Place, and, well here we are.
This place was so vivid in your mind, but there is nothing like the real thing, is there? The sights, the sounds, the [SNIFFS.]
smells! Oh, I forgot about smells, Eliot.
They're overwhelmingly unpleasant.
Those messages? That was you, too? "I'm still here"? "Let me out"? Yes.
I wanted you to know that I was still here and I wanted to be let out.
In red paint? Right, like strawberries and Santa Claus.
And blood, Charlton.
Well, perhaps it was a touch ominous.
As was the creepy whisper.
- I was trying to be polite.
- Well It is nice to have a non-imaginary imaginary friend for the end of the world, I guess.
Half-imaginary.
I was passenger in your unconscious.
Now, I'm still in your head.
But the conscious part? I can't tell you how much of an improvement this is.
Your Happy Place is nice and I was able to see everything you were doing here, but well, there's no substitute for being heard.
Especially since I often disagree with your choices, and I'd like to share my opinions.
Oh, that's peachy.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
Well, let's start now.
[EXHALES DEEPLY.]
Opinion on what to do next? Oh, well, I'd think that's obvious.
[CHUCKLES.]
Is it? In case you didn't notice, Margo was sort of driving the bus on this whole thing before I screwed up and lost her.
You didn't lose her, Eliot.
She's out of the loops, Charlton.
No, I simply mean I don't think that's about you.
I think she got too close to the answer.
Perhaps that's why she was thrown from your shared loop experience.
That does have the ring of logic to it.
Margo mentioned a beach, did she not? Fisher Beach.
[SOFT DREAMY MUSIC.]
Okay.
Let's go.
Why is there no one here? I think it's a cancel-your-beach-trip kind of day today.
Psst keep your eyes peeled for anyone or anything who might not want us here.
Is that phone wire? Are phones generally used underwater? I think we got a lead.
Lifeguard station 17.
That's the same track Margo was on.
This didn't go well for her, so perhaps we should discuss before going in there, okay? Ovary up, Charlton.
[SOFT SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC.]
Uh I guess off and whales? [STERNLY.]
What is the purpose of this distraction? With whom are we speaking? We are the whales.
Like all of them? Of course.
Why do you speak through a TV? Why do you? What is the nature of your query? Okay, I don't really know how to explain this.
Um okay, so you probably don't know this, but we we are in a time loop.
We are aware of the disturbance.
Oh, huh.
Whales grok time loops.
So do you happen to remember if a woman named Margo came to see you? Uh, brilliant, about yea high, maybe a little brusque.
A contemptuous creature.
We were compelled to wash away her temporal immunity.
You took her Permanence off.
Why? Her manner was appalling.
That does sound like Margo, okay.
I apologize for her bedside manner, and I just I humbly and I respectfully ask, do you do you have any insight into this loop that we're in? Our magic caused it.
[GASPS.]
You're magicians? Pay attention! We will explain once.
Our ancestors made a pact with the Old Gods and so we spend our lives tracing sigils into the ocean floor.
This task is crucial.
Why? To ensure the Kraken stays dormant.
Like the the Kraken-kraken? What's a Kraken-kraken? Should the Kraken ever awaken it would soon consume the world.
Okay, got it.
So, the loops.
Why? The moon colliding with Earth obliterated our protective sigils causing the Kraken to rise.
[WHALES SINGING.]
Kinda seems like a hat on a hat when you've already got a moon apocalypse.
A bit flippant for a creature who caused said apocalypse.
Fortunately, our ancestors implemented a failsafe.
If the Kraken awakens, it sends Earth back 12 hours to allow another chance to avert catastrophe.
Whereupon it'll all just keep happening because the fucking moon is broken.
So it would seem.
Well uh well, if you're if you're magicians, then maybe you can help fix the moon? We cannot.
We must maintain our sigils.
Okay.
If you don't fix the moon, the Kraken's just just gonna keep krakening.
This distraction has gone on too long.
Wait no, no, no.
We must attend to the sigils.
- Hold on.
- Do not contact us again.
No, no, no, no, no.
- No! - [STATIC FIZZES.]
Uh oh, shit.
[BELL DINGS.]
Feeling the wrong kind of boned right now.
Oh, okay.
Bye, I guess.
[EXHALES DEEPLY.]
What am I supposed to do? I can't fix the moon.
That won't work.
You can't help, you're non-corporeal.
True.
But [WHISPERS.]
you're not alone.
So whales really are powerful magicians.
I knew they did weird stuff on the ocean floor, - I just didn't realize it was - Wait.
Yes, Alice tell me what else you know about whales.
Um their closest cousin is the hippo.
Um, their mating season is in the fall.
That is so sad for them.
What if they never get to make love again? Though I am one to talk.
I mean, it's been over a thousand years.
That's not exactly what I needed.
Well, you asked me what I knew.
Is there any info about the Kraken that might point us in a direction? Whoa-ho-ho! Okay.
Well, you have your Lovecraftian god-Krakens.
Uh, and then there's the D&D Kraken which is sort of six-of-one.
And then, of course, there's "Clash of the Titans", - both the original and the remake.
- Thank you.
With the very famous line Thank you, Josh.
Every time the Kraken awakens, time jumps back 12 hours.
Which would be great if it took us back to before the moon broke.
What if we get the time loop spell to trigger a couple hours early? Why don't we just kill all the damn whales? Well, that's clearly what you tried to do when they took away your Permanence.
But she's right.
Maybe we need to let out the thing that scares us.
Maybe we need to, uh, to [MOUTH FULL.]
Release the Kraken! Exactly, yeah.
[STUTTERS.]
But earlier.
Early early enough to a time before the heist.
Shit, we're almost out of time.
[AIR RAID SIRENS WAILING.]
[SOFT DRAMATIC MUSIC.]
Look, if the whales have the power to take away your Permanence, this could be your last shot.
No presh, but you're our only hope.
I will do my very best.
- [BOOM.]
- [BELL DINGS.]
[GASPS.]
Surely, you jest.
I know, I know.
It goes against everything you've ever believed in, and I fully respect that, but the only way to fix this is to release the Kraken right now.
Well, I don't think they liked that.
What? No.
Damn it! Eliot? Please be careful.
Uh, you don't know what they will do.
Hey! You know I'm right! I know you're listening.
You know, I have it on good authority that mating season is in the fall.
Do you never wanna fuck again? - Eliot, that was too personal.
- Uh okay, uh, sorry.
Look, I get it.
Look, I get it your ancestors made a deal, but special circumstances, okay? Just let it out for 30 seconds.
I will fix this and then, you know, uh, the Kraken will be back in its safe little sea bed and, uh, you can maintain your sigils for all of eternity.
You gotta trust me.
Just release the goddamn Kraken.
Please, please, please, please, please.
[WATER BUBBLING.]
Look.
[DRAMATIC MUSIC.]
Hi there! Uh are you the Kraken? [CHUCKING.]
No.
[DRAMATIC MUSIC.]
[HOWLING.]
ALL: [SCREAMING.]
Josh, Margo, Penny.
You guys go inside, loop all the cameras, open the side door for Natasha.
I'll be outside waiting with Eliot and Alice.
Holy shit.
Holy shit.
[CHUCKLING.]
Holy shit.
This is before the moon broke.
[LAUGHS.]
It worked.
- Okay, break.
- Sorry.
[CRICKETS CHIRPING.]
Um, could you just, uh could you You're freaking out, aren't you? - No.
- Look, you can pull the ripcord now.
- Get out, we'll handle this.
- Margo.
Credenza.
Don't ask questions, just do what you say? Mm-hmm.
Fine.
Okay.
[INHALES DEEPLY.]
Slight change of plans.
We are so close to saving everyone.
You can't take that away from us now.
Look, whatever it is you're after what's the point if there's no world left? There'll still be a world, just not as many people.
Have you met people? I've met people, many people.
How many people have you met? Because I bet I've met more people.
What the fuck is wrong with you? Hi.
What the hell did Hell, yes.
What the how did you Julia, now.
[UPLIFTING DRAMATIC MUSIC.]
[CHUCKLES.]
[BELL DINGS.]
- [LAUGHTER.]
- Hey! Hot pizza! That's one pizza we definitely can enjoy.
All right.
Oh, nice pour right there.
[LAUGHTER, CHATTER.]
Yes, cheers, cheers, yes.
- Bam! - [LAUGHTER.]
- All right, Emeril.
- Fresco pizza! - Yes, cheers.
- [GLASSES CLINKING.]
Whoo! You don't want a drink? [EXHALES DEEPLY.]
Actually, I desperately do not.
That's concerning.
Those time loops must've really did a number on you.
So You're right, I have been pushing you away.
Yeah, no shit.
It's just I do remember the Monster.
It was bad and bloody and, um Those memories are, like, right here.
And, um you know, maybe I really do need that drink.
I don't get why you feel like you have to go it alone.
[GROANS QUIETLY.]
I don't either.
My logical brain knows without a doubt that I'm better with you.
Yes, and same.
[SIGHS.]
Tell your coping mechanisms to back off [CHUCKLES.]
Or I'll punch 'em in the dick.
During the loops, we were in it together and then you were gone, and shocking revelation I am utterly miserable when you're not around.
[LAUGHS.]
Yeah, I know.
I don't know if that's fair to you.
What are you talking about? The other thing I learned being in the loops with you for so long you're not exactly who you used to be.
You've Please don't say aged.
You've evolved, Margo Hanson.
You've become more of your true self.
- [CHUCKLES.]
- You've earned it.
And I don't want to ask you to take a step back just so I can try and catch up.
Oh.
I was a mess you had to untangle in there just so you could soldier on, and once you did, you figured out how to fix all of this.
And then you picked up the baton and actually did the thing.
- I got lucky.
- No.
It's 'cause you understand me better than anyone.
Mm-hmm.
So quit acting like you're the screw-up and get on my level, El.
You did it.
You did when the world was on the line, now do it for yourself.
I don't know if I want to get on your level knowing that you jacked off Todd.
- I did not.
- Yeah, you did.
I did not.
[LOUD BANGING ON DOOR.]
The hell? Coming.
[NONSTOP KNOCKING ON DOOR.]
Oh, thank God! I've tried every other magical Penthouse in the city and Todd.
Wh uh, what Why are you here? I need your help.
Something just happened that feels way above my pay grade, and you were the first person I thought of who could help me handle it.
Okay, it's a weird one.
Just hear me out, okay? So this pig dude who kind of looks like that one guy Paul Giamatti played in that one show with all the wigs told me I'm supposed to do a quest.
Seriously? That asshole went to you? Wow.
Ha.
Yeah, he's extremely committed to finding a dude.
Yeah, it's fine, Todd.
We fixed it.
- Are you sure? - Yeah, yes, I'm sure.
The Harmonic Convergence isn't happening anymore.
[STUTTERS.]
The who now? The end of the world? Uh, no.
He did say the end of something but not that.
He was talking about Fillory.
Remind me, is Fillory real? [SOFT DRAMATIC MUSIC.]
The end of Fillory? So so we saved the wrong world? So we're not done.
Of course.
[SOFT, DRAMATIC MUSIC.]
You said you don't remember what happened when you were possessed, but Julia does.
And I don't.
I don't know why you're accusing me of lying.
[WHISPERING.]
Eliot, let me out.
We're looking for Stoppard.
Mom? Mom, what's wrong? Moms die every day.
Circle of life.
We know you're trying to look out for your mom.
You're saying you'll leave? Sorry, man.
I'm not going anywhere.
The Harmonic Convergence.
AKA the end of the world.
The convergence will only occur during this perfect alignment.
If we move the moon out of position No Convergence, no Circumstance, no apocalypse.
If you have moon brain, then you will see Her aura.
If it is green, She is listening.
Only then may you ask Her to move.
You will need a piece of Her.
Like a moon rock? In here, boss.
Ladies.
- You're moving the moon? - Yeah.
[BOTH SHOUTING.]
[EXPLOSION.]
Uh, guys? I think we broke the moon.
NASA estimates just hours before the first pieces reach our atmosphere.
In a tweet, the president stressed the need for calm, saying, "We will fix the moon decisively.
The American people have absolutely nothing to fear.
" [BELL DINGS.]
I know we are dealing with the lunapocalypse problem, but I have to insist that we all take a minute for a little self-care/pizza, okay? Okay.
Cautioning everyone that though the world appears to be coming to an end, everyone's behavior will still be counted when the time comes for judgment.
Feeling the wrong kind of boned right now.
At least the Harmonic Convergence isn't happening anymore.
[INHALES, EXHALES DEEPLY.]
I just have this bad feeling.
Hey.
We'll figure out how to stop this.
I mean, on the off-chance the president doesn't.
Let's review.
Emergency code words if this all goes shit-shaped? Um - Really? - Kidding.
Okay.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
As follows.
"Credenza," no questions asked.
"Inglenook," tie those fools up, toss 'em through the Fillory portal.
"Chifforobe," flee to Canada.
"Armoire," shield up, stat.
"Kimono" BOTH: All hell has broken loose.
Time and hope are quickly running out.
Everything I'm seeing says the first chunk's gonna hit around 10:00 p.
m.
We have 12 hours.
[BOWL CLATTERS.]
Uh, look.
What if we created a massive portal in the atmosphere? No, we need a specialist, and the meta-math is just it's too this is really bad, Julia.
Nuh-uh.
Don't you dare give up.
- [SNEEZES.]
- This math is so damn frustrating.
Yeah, but you'll get it.
Jesus.
- What happened to your shoe? - Have you been out there? It is the literal end of the actual world.
No, it's not.
We're gonna stop it.
Yeah, tell that to the rioters and the prayer circles and people fucking in the streets.
I can't believe this is happening.
I'm just numb.
Try the truffled prosciutto, it's incredible.
I did have one idea after my very bad idea to take the subway.
Okay, do you know Richard's Reverse Entropy spell? We already talked about it.
Unfortunately, it's just way too small.
True, but I reworked it.
And check my math.
[MUTTERS.]
This is fantastic, but I don't think we have enough cooperative power.
Chances are high for a surge in the next 12 hours.
- We could use it.
- And we have enough hedges around the world on standby to do it with us, so That might not be enough.
We make it enough.
Today we are saving the world, and this time it's gonna stick.
Damn right, we are.
Okay.
[SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE.]
But just in case Anything I need to say to you? Jules, we're good.
[INDISTINCT SPEECH ON TV.]
[SMOOCHES.]
Scientists around the world have been sending out their predictions for what we should expect in the coming hours.
Though the tides remain mysteriously intact, expect volcanic activity, tectonic shifts, disrupted weather patterns, and strange behavior from animal life.
[DRAMATIC MUSIC.]
And to Sharon Cappanelli from ninth grade: I lied.
It was my tampon, and that was your girlfriend.
I'm not sorry.
Thanks for spreading the word, Pete.
Stand by.
[SIREN WAILING.]
Everyone's set.
We're just waiting for the surge.
[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC.]
You guys feel that? It's the surge.
It's cresting.
We should Go.
Pete, now! Did it work? [SIREN WAILING.]
It didn't work.
We failed.
[EXPLOSIONS.]
[EERIE MUSIC.]
[EXPLOSION.]
[BELL DINGS.]
[INHALES, EXHALES DEEPLY.]
Feeling the wrong kind of boned right now.
At least the Harmonic Convergence isn't happening anymore.
Although the world's greatest minds are locked in a desperate race to save humanity from this sudden lunar cataclysm, time and hope are quickly running out.
Everything I'm seeing says the first chunk's gonna hit around 10:00 p.
m.
We have 12 hours.
[SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE.]
Uh, look, what if we created a massive portal in the atmosphere? We need a specialist, and the meta-math is just it's too - this is really bad, Julia.
- Am I crazy, or This already happened, right? - [SNEEZES.]
- This math is so damn frustrating.
This did.
This did already happen.
[GASPS.]
Ow! Not a dream.
Hey, am I on something, or did we try this plan yesterday? We're At Westbrook's estate? [FOOTSTEPS.]
Jesus.
- [LAUGHS.]
- What happened to your shoe? Have you been out there? It's the literal end of the actual world.
No, it's not.
We're stopping it.
Tell that to the rioters, prayer circles, and people fucking in the streets.
BOTH: We're in a time loop.
Excuse us while we briefly sidebar.
Why exactly is this happening? "Why is anything?" he asked, still freaked, 'cause the last thing he remembers is all of Earth ending.
- It felt so inevitable.
- I know.
But why us, now? Time loop? Of course we're the chosen ones.
We're us.
Okay, everybody.
What is going on with you two? Quick recap, Kady's plan won't work.
We tried it, and the moon still crashed into the Earth.
Uh, okay.
What do you mean, "tried it"? We suspect we're in a time loop.
How? Obviously the moon's a wily cunt who doesn't wanna die.
Okay.
All right, so no reverse entropy.
What do you guys suggest? We cast Vinnola's Oxygen Saver on Penny 23, then he travels to the moon.
It's easier to do a portal there.
Look, GPS is kinda broken.
- I might end up in a wall.
- It's the apocalypse.
Gonna need you to try.
[SOFT MUSIC.]
Fuck all of you.
Fine.
[INHALES, SIGHS.]
[UPBEAT MUSIC.]
You got this, man.
[INHALES DEEPLY.]
- [CRUNCH.]
- Oh oh, no! No! No! [ALL EXCLAIMING.]
[THUD.]
[GROANS.]
[EXPLOSIONS.]
[BELL DINGS.]
Okay, forget the moon.
Let's move the Earth.
Kady, get your hedge bitches on the horn.
- We got cooperating to do.
- I'm on it.
[EXPLOSIONS.]
- [BELL DINGS.]
- Okay.
I found a spell that can hold the pieces in suspension, we just right, good to assume we can all do sphincter magic? [EXPLOSIONS.]
[BELL DINGS.]
Could we make this very big? [EXPLOSIONS.]
- [BELL DINGS.]
- Mother-shit! You you okay? No, Julia.
I'm not okay.
Bless you.
[SNEEZES.]
Whoa.
Allow me to explain.
So here we are, eight loops in.
Ten.
If these loops sent us back even a little earlier, we could stop Marina from bad-touching this whole situation, but we can't.
Okay, so we need time magic.
I know a horomancer who builds machines.
- Maybe he has something.
- Fantastic, vámanos.
One problem I kind of let his mom die last time I saw him.
Oh.
Oh, come on.
Like you guys are all saints? You're in a time loop? - Well, why you two? - 'Cause we're the best-looking.
Here.
This is Penny's address.
- Margo, what are you doing? - [SHUSHES.]
Favorite coffee shop, hipster club where we suspect he DJ's on the weekend, and it's your lucky day his Travelling's borked, so he's a sitting duck in a scarf.
Margo, we can't just kill Penny.
We don't; he dies anyway, along with everyone.
This is basic trolley problem shit.
Ovary up.
- Okay.
- If I wanted revenge on Penny, I would've gotten that a long time ago.
You've got particles all over you.
Were you spritzed with something? Spritzed, like with what? Something that nebulized a cloud of temporal permanence around you? [CLICKS TONGUE.]
Mm.
BOTH: "Permanence.
" For men and women.
Yeah, I may have accidentally stolen a weird perfume bottle from a time witch in Fillory.
Okay, whatever you really did, it's created a field around you both that would explain why you're in a time loop.
Ah.
And here we thought we were special.
- What are you doing? - Helping.
You said it's the end of the world, right? - That is right.
- I think I can hop you guys back a full 48 hours so you can prevent this.
Oh, really? Just like that? Well, it's really goddamn complicated, but I'm a genius.
- Oh.
- Oh.
Here we go.
[DEVICE CLICKING.]
Are we time traveling right now? The hell? What's wrong? [GROANS.]
Nothing's working at all.
- Are you saying your shit's broken? - I hope so.
The alternative is all time magic's in some kind of lockdown.
What could even do that? Something powerful and ancient.
You mean like the moon? Maybe if I just fix this and bypass the oscillation Hey, no rush, but in 30 seconds, we're all gonna die.
This'll get you there.
Not in one piece, but Wait, what? [DEVICE CLICKS.]
Shit.
- I'm sorry.
- Oh, well.
[EXPLOSIONS.]
[BELL DINGS.]
I cannot believe we didn't consider going to Jane Chatwin first.
Well, she is a person that may be upset with us.
Yes.
- No.
- Huh.
Time magic's locked down, and the portal to Fillory's blocked.
This smacks of a not-so-random coincidence.
[EMERGENCY SIRENS WAILING.]
Okay.
We can still get there.
Penny can't do shit.
What about that other Traveller dickbucket, - Gavin what's-his-name? - Everything I'm seeing says the first chunk's gonna hit around 10:00 p.
m.
TOGETHER: We know! 12 hours.
We're seeing this wrong.
We're missing something.
Uh, maybe we need to take a step back.
Start thinking outside the box.
- What do you suggest? - Remember Professor Soto? - Oh, the one with the pants? - Yeah.
He had that ridiculous test everyone thought was impossible.
That we solved because we rule.
- Solved how? - You want me to remember a solution I came up with at a rager doing upside-down shots in a fur bikini? You say rager, I say problem-solving session.
That's how we do: we put our minds on something different and we catch the solution out of the corner of our eye.
So is this actually a plan or do you just wanna blow off steam? Two birds, Bambi.
Besides, we're stuck in a game that keeps hitting reset.
Infinite time, zero consequences.
Just you and me saving the world through unbridled hedonism.
Mm, fun.
Let's do it.
[KNOCK AT DOOR.]
[WHISPERING.]
Eliot.
[KNOCKING.]
- Hey.
- Uh, hey.
Did someone just knock on the door? No.
We going? Yeah.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
Okay, miscreants.
It's Armageddon.
So die as you lived - Boring.
- Or join us in an end-of-the-world soiree and die legends.
Your choice.
You heard the man.
[ROWDY MUSIC.]
[CLAPS.]
Come on! It's a tie! Anything? Not yet! [LAUGHS.]
- Oh! - [LAUGHS.]
- [SCREAMS.]
- [ROWDY SCREAMING.]
[BELL DINGS.]
- [REPTILE ROOM'S "CONTROL".]
- Gimme your control Gimme your control Mmm.
[WHISPERING.]
Eliot! [MUSIC FADES.]
El, El.
You look like you saw a ghost.
Hey, ask it how we stop the moon.
- Actually, I think I might - Wait! Oh, my God, I think I got something.
An idea.
Hit me.
[LAUGHS.]
Cock and balls, I forgot.
- [CHUCKLES QUIETLY.]
- [LAUGHS LOUDLY.]
[BELL DINGS.]
[DUBSTEP MUSIC.]
This isn't working.
No offense, Rajit.
- It's Todd.
- [LAUGHS.]
No.
Come back when you're Rajit.
Okay.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
You know, I've been thinking clearly we need something a little bit stronger.
No, we need an idea.
You know what? I'm gonna go hydrate and, I don't know stare at moon chunks hurtling straight for Earth.
Can't be worse than discovering I just jacked Todd off for three time loops in a row.
[LAUGHS.]
Eliot.
No [QUIETLY.]
It's never happening.
[LOUDLY.]
Leave me alone.
[BELL DINGS.]
I never, never, never, get so close It's under control I'm reachin' the end of a hallway I never, never, never - Been so out my body - [KNOCKING.]
[MUSIC FADES.]
[KNOCKING CONTINUES.]
[KNOCKING CONTINUES.]
I can walk away from you all fucking day! [BELL DINGS.]
Pardon me, Brenda.
I'm gonna get this.
[DREAMY DANCE MUSIC.]
[INHALES DEEPLY.]
I got a lead.
I've been talking to this weird oceanographer guy who no joke has a dolphin harem, but he also knows some real shit about Hey, what's up with you? What's up is my brain is a snake eating its tail, and the tail is another snake eating its tail.
Jesus.
Okay, you stay here.
I'll report back with some research.
[BELL DINGS.]
[BREATHING HARD.]
[EERILY MUFFLED.]
I figured it out, El.
From talking to that dolphin fucker.
Everything he said checked out.
We need to go to Fisher Beach.
It's kind of out of the way.
Lifeguard station 17.
Everything I'm seeing says the first chunk's - gonna hit around 10:00 p.
m - Eliot.
- We have 12 hours.
- Hey.
I got the answer.
You can take a breather.
Not right now, Margo.
Okay, "Leaving Las Vegas.
" I was happy to give you space to tell your Monster secrets in your own time, but we're stuck in the Jean-Paul Sartre bullshit and you're getting worse fast.
I told you, this isn't important right now, okay? Whatever it is, you remember it's not your fault, okay? This math is so damn frustrating.
Can we just stop the moon first, please? Not if your liver falls out of your twat first.
Let's talk about it.
- No.
- Seems like we have to.
It's me.
- Don't be a coward.
- Stop.
[INHALES DEEPLY.]
It's still in me, okay? [SOFT DRAMATIC MUSIC.]
[INHALES DEEPLY.]
I am seeing what I am seeing.
Some pieces of him must've held on.
The Monster is gone.
I exorcised it and Q threw it into the Seam.
The only thing here is you medicating instead of facing your memories and your feelings and I empathize, I do.
But I think you're forgetting you can tell me anything.
I just told you, and you didn't believe me.
I love you.
Even when you're nuts.
But our window's 12 hours to stop the moon or it's game over again, and I need it to be fixed before I go as nuts as you, so just sit this round out - No.
- And I'll go alone.
No, no, no.
Please, please.
I can - You can't.
- Keep it together, I can keep it together.
- See you yesterday.
- I can keep it together.
Please.
No, Margo.
[SOMBER MUSIC.]
[DUBSTEP MUSIC.]
[BELL DINGS.]
[INHALES, EXHALES.]
I'm feeling the wrong kind of boned right now.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
What you said yesterday Yesterday at Westbrook's house? [DISTANT COMMOTION.]
Yesterday before you went to Fisher Beach.
I didn't go to Fisher Beach.
- You don't - At around 10 p.
m.
- We have 12 hours.
- You don't remember.
Remember that tit-chafe Marina showed up and broke the moon? - How could I forget? - [SNEEZES.]
Did Josh just sneeze on the pizza? [EERIE DISSONANT MUSIC.]
[BELL DINGS.]
So let's release that ache, that desire for control.
Understand the moment we're in.
Accept our state of being.
Take a breath.
Send a prayer up to the god of your understanding.
Send a prayer and accept.
Amen.
- ALL: Amen.
- Thank you.
You've momentarily lessened my existential dread.
[SOFT SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC.]
[DOOR SLAMS.]
This may be the end.
No, I'm not reading this.
Okay, asshole.
Bring it.
I just wanna say This world is flawed.
We each have good in us and bad.
Every day we fight to let the good win.
This this is the last day.
Think about those who you love.
Turn off the TV and be with them.
- Thank you and good - [LAPTOP CLICKS SHUT.]
I'm sorry.
Were you listening to that? It was so depressing.
Not really.
Hey, you okay? Not really.
Me neither.
Cookie? Yeah.
[PANIC AND SIRENS WAILING.]
I have to admit I don't think their spell will work.
[CHUCKLES DRYLY.]
It won't.
Can't believe I'm about to die.
You are, but then you'll just start all over again.
We're in a time loop.
Shut up.
Seriously? That's a relief.
Like, uh, "Groundhog Day"? [CHUCKLES.]
Or "Russian Doll"? Or "Happy Death Day" or "Happy Death Day 2U"? Or "Source Code"? Oh, that "X-Files".
The "Star Trek".
"Edge of Tomorrow" but really "All You Need Is Kill" and it's, like, why change the title like that, right? Wow.
You really love time loop stories, don't you? And you're awake in the loop.
You're the hero.
I am totally jealous.
[HELICOPTER BLADES WHIRRING.]
[EMERGENCY SIRENS WAILING.]
Hey, you wanna get out of here? I've got this place on my bucket list and well, uh it's gotta be now.
And to Sharon Cappanelli from ninth grade: I lied.
- Man.
- It was my tampon, - and that was your girlfriend.
- Time loops.
Gnarly.
Extremely gnarly.
So you're talking to me about it.
Yeah.
As opposed to Alice, Julia, or Kady.
Or, to state the obvious, Margo.
I kind of blew it beyond repair with Margo.
How is anything beyond repair when you're stuck in a time loop? Well, she was awake with me for a while and then she got kicked out somehow, and now I am utterly alone.
Well, if I'm learning anything from these squishy pierogi tacos is that not everything belongs together.
[POLICE SIREN WAILING.]
- How can we help? - Help save the world? [CHUCKLES.]
Honestly, I don't know.
It might not be possible.
This might be it.
Me, alone, in this particular 12 hours.
- Eternally.
- Okay.
Sounds like a lot for you.
So, uh, anything I can do to help you? [GROANS QUIETLY.]
I wish.
Because the longer this goes on, the more certain I am that the Monster is inside of me and trying to get out.
Good metaphor.
I'm being literal.
Oh.
Shit.
[EXHALES DEEPLY.]
It's worse every loop.
I hear its voice, I see blood on the walls, I I see this door.
It wants out.
Have you tried letting it out? Why in God's name would I do that? I I I'm just spitballing.
A lot of the time in these movies the solution of the problem is facing the thing you're most afraid of.
What if I die? What if you do? - [TIRES SQUEAL.]
- [MAN SCREAMS AND CAR SMASHES.]
WOMAN: Why?! Anyway.
You're not upset you're about to die? [AIR RAID SIREN WAILING.]
I don't love it.
But you'll figure out a way to fix this.
[SIREN CONTINUES WAILING.]
[BELL DINGS.]
[ECHOEY AND DISTANT.]
The world's greatest minds are locked in a desperate race to save humanity.
Everything I'm seeing says the first chunk's gotta hit around 10 p.
m.
We have 12 hours.
[BOWL CLATTERS.]
What if we create a massive portal in the atmosphere? We'd need a specialist.
[SNEEZES.]
[KNOCK AT DOOR.]
[KNOCKING CONTINUES.]
[KNOCKING.]
[BREATHING DEEPLY.]
[KNOCKING.]
[EERIE MUSIC.]
[HINGES CREAK.]
[EXHALES.]
Charlton? Well, fuck! [CHUCKLES.]
How the hell are you here? I was trapped wandering your Remembrances when mercifully you decided not to sleep for five days and broke your brain.
That gave me an opening to contact you.
That voice? That was you? [CHUCKLING.]
Yes, of course.
When all the scary creatures were pulled out, I held on tight as I could in your Happy Place, and, well here we are.
This place was so vivid in your mind, but there is nothing like the real thing, is there? The sights, the sounds, the [SNIFFS.]
smells! Oh, I forgot about smells, Eliot.
They're overwhelmingly unpleasant.
Those messages? That was you, too? "I'm still here"? "Let me out"? Yes.
I wanted you to know that I was still here and I wanted to be let out.
In red paint? Right, like strawberries and Santa Claus.
And blood, Charlton.
Well, perhaps it was a touch ominous.
As was the creepy whisper.
- I was trying to be polite.
- Well It is nice to have a non-imaginary imaginary friend for the end of the world, I guess.
Half-imaginary.
I was passenger in your unconscious.
Now, I'm still in your head.
But the conscious part? I can't tell you how much of an improvement this is.
Your Happy Place is nice and I was able to see everything you were doing here, but well, there's no substitute for being heard.
Especially since I often disagree with your choices, and I'd like to share my opinions.
Oh, that's peachy.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
Well, let's start now.
[EXHALES DEEPLY.]
Opinion on what to do next? Oh, well, I'd think that's obvious.
[CHUCKLES.]
Is it? In case you didn't notice, Margo was sort of driving the bus on this whole thing before I screwed up and lost her.
You didn't lose her, Eliot.
She's out of the loops, Charlton.
No, I simply mean I don't think that's about you.
I think she got too close to the answer.
Perhaps that's why she was thrown from your shared loop experience.
That does have the ring of logic to it.
Margo mentioned a beach, did she not? Fisher Beach.
[SOFT DREAMY MUSIC.]
Okay.
Let's go.
Why is there no one here? I think it's a cancel-your-beach-trip kind of day today.
Psst keep your eyes peeled for anyone or anything who might not want us here.
Is that phone wire? Are phones generally used underwater? I think we got a lead.
Lifeguard station 17.
That's the same track Margo was on.
This didn't go well for her, so perhaps we should discuss before going in there, okay? Ovary up, Charlton.
[SOFT SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC.]
Uh I guess off and whales? [STERNLY.]
What is the purpose of this distraction? With whom are we speaking? We are the whales.
Like all of them? Of course.
Why do you speak through a TV? Why do you? What is the nature of your query? Okay, I don't really know how to explain this.
Um okay, so you probably don't know this, but we we are in a time loop.
We are aware of the disturbance.
Oh, huh.
Whales grok time loops.
So do you happen to remember if a woman named Margo came to see you? Uh, brilliant, about yea high, maybe a little brusque.
A contemptuous creature.
We were compelled to wash away her temporal immunity.
You took her Permanence off.
Why? Her manner was appalling.
That does sound like Margo, okay.
I apologize for her bedside manner, and I just I humbly and I respectfully ask, do you do you have any insight into this loop that we're in? Our magic caused it.
[GASPS.]
You're magicians? Pay attention! We will explain once.
Our ancestors made a pact with the Old Gods and so we spend our lives tracing sigils into the ocean floor.
This task is crucial.
Why? To ensure the Kraken stays dormant.
Like the the Kraken-kraken? What's a Kraken-kraken? Should the Kraken ever awaken it would soon consume the world.
Okay, got it.
So, the loops.
Why? The moon colliding with Earth obliterated our protective sigils causing the Kraken to rise.
[WHALES SINGING.]
Kinda seems like a hat on a hat when you've already got a moon apocalypse.
A bit flippant for a creature who caused said apocalypse.
Fortunately, our ancestors implemented a failsafe.
If the Kraken awakens, it sends Earth back 12 hours to allow another chance to avert catastrophe.
Whereupon it'll all just keep happening because the fucking moon is broken.
So it would seem.
Well uh well, if you're if you're magicians, then maybe you can help fix the moon? We cannot.
We must maintain our sigils.
Okay.
If you don't fix the moon, the Kraken's just just gonna keep krakening.
This distraction has gone on too long.
Wait no, no, no.
We must attend to the sigils.
- Hold on.
- Do not contact us again.
No, no, no, no, no.
- No! - [STATIC FIZZES.]
Uh oh, shit.
[BELL DINGS.]
Feeling the wrong kind of boned right now.
Oh, okay.
Bye, I guess.
[EXHALES DEEPLY.]
What am I supposed to do? I can't fix the moon.
That won't work.
You can't help, you're non-corporeal.
True.
But [WHISPERS.]
you're not alone.
So whales really are powerful magicians.
I knew they did weird stuff on the ocean floor, - I just didn't realize it was - Wait.
Yes, Alice tell me what else you know about whales.
Um their closest cousin is the hippo.
Um, their mating season is in the fall.
That is so sad for them.
What if they never get to make love again? Though I am one to talk.
I mean, it's been over a thousand years.
That's not exactly what I needed.
Well, you asked me what I knew.
Is there any info about the Kraken that might point us in a direction? Whoa-ho-ho! Okay.
Well, you have your Lovecraftian god-Krakens.
Uh, and then there's the D&D Kraken which is sort of six-of-one.
And then, of course, there's "Clash of the Titans", - both the original and the remake.
- Thank you.
With the very famous line Thank you, Josh.
Every time the Kraken awakens, time jumps back 12 hours.
Which would be great if it took us back to before the moon broke.
What if we get the time loop spell to trigger a couple hours early? Why don't we just kill all the damn whales? Well, that's clearly what you tried to do when they took away your Permanence.
But she's right.
Maybe we need to let out the thing that scares us.
Maybe we need to, uh, to [MOUTH FULL.]
Release the Kraken! Exactly, yeah.
[STUTTERS.]
But earlier.
Early early enough to a time before the heist.
Shit, we're almost out of time.
[AIR RAID SIRENS WAILING.]
[SOFT DRAMATIC MUSIC.]
Look, if the whales have the power to take away your Permanence, this could be your last shot.
No presh, but you're our only hope.
I will do my very best.
- [BOOM.]
- [BELL DINGS.]
[GASPS.]
Surely, you jest.
I know, I know.
It goes against everything you've ever believed in, and I fully respect that, but the only way to fix this is to release the Kraken right now.
Well, I don't think they liked that.
What? No.
Damn it! Eliot? Please be careful.
Uh, you don't know what they will do.
Hey! You know I'm right! I know you're listening.
You know, I have it on good authority that mating season is in the fall.
Do you never wanna fuck again? - Eliot, that was too personal.
- Uh okay, uh, sorry.
Look, I get it.
Look, I get it your ancestors made a deal, but special circumstances, okay? Just let it out for 30 seconds.
I will fix this and then, you know, uh, the Kraken will be back in its safe little sea bed and, uh, you can maintain your sigils for all of eternity.
You gotta trust me.
Just release the goddamn Kraken.
Please, please, please, please, please.
[WATER BUBBLING.]
Look.
[DRAMATIC MUSIC.]
Hi there! Uh are you the Kraken? [CHUCKING.]
No.
[DRAMATIC MUSIC.]
[HOWLING.]
ALL: [SCREAMING.]
Josh, Margo, Penny.
You guys go inside, loop all the cameras, open the side door for Natasha.
I'll be outside waiting with Eliot and Alice.
Holy shit.
Holy shit.
[CHUCKLING.]
Holy shit.
This is before the moon broke.
[LAUGHS.]
It worked.
- Okay, break.
- Sorry.
[CRICKETS CHIRPING.]
Um, could you just, uh could you You're freaking out, aren't you? - No.
- Look, you can pull the ripcord now.
- Get out, we'll handle this.
- Margo.
Credenza.
Don't ask questions, just do what you say? Mm-hmm.
Fine.
Okay.
[INHALES DEEPLY.]
Slight change of plans.
We are so close to saving everyone.
You can't take that away from us now.
Look, whatever it is you're after what's the point if there's no world left? There'll still be a world, just not as many people.
Have you met people? I've met people, many people.
How many people have you met? Because I bet I've met more people.
What the fuck is wrong with you? Hi.
What the hell did Hell, yes.
What the how did you Julia, now.
[UPLIFTING DRAMATIC MUSIC.]
[CHUCKLES.]
[BELL DINGS.]
- [LAUGHTER.]
- Hey! Hot pizza! That's one pizza we definitely can enjoy.
All right.
Oh, nice pour right there.
[LAUGHTER, CHATTER.]
Yes, cheers, cheers, yes.
- Bam! - [LAUGHTER.]
- All right, Emeril.
- Fresco pizza! - Yes, cheers.
- [GLASSES CLINKING.]
Whoo! You don't want a drink? [EXHALES DEEPLY.]
Actually, I desperately do not.
That's concerning.
Those time loops must've really did a number on you.
So You're right, I have been pushing you away.
Yeah, no shit.
It's just I do remember the Monster.
It was bad and bloody and, um Those memories are, like, right here.
And, um you know, maybe I really do need that drink.
I don't get why you feel like you have to go it alone.
[GROANS QUIETLY.]
I don't either.
My logical brain knows without a doubt that I'm better with you.
Yes, and same.
[SIGHS.]
Tell your coping mechanisms to back off [CHUCKLES.]
Or I'll punch 'em in the dick.
During the loops, we were in it together and then you were gone, and shocking revelation I am utterly miserable when you're not around.
[LAUGHS.]
Yeah, I know.
I don't know if that's fair to you.
What are you talking about? The other thing I learned being in the loops with you for so long you're not exactly who you used to be.
You've Please don't say aged.
You've evolved, Margo Hanson.
You've become more of your true self.
- [CHUCKLES.]
- You've earned it.
And I don't want to ask you to take a step back just so I can try and catch up.
Oh.
I was a mess you had to untangle in there just so you could soldier on, and once you did, you figured out how to fix all of this.
And then you picked up the baton and actually did the thing.
- I got lucky.
- No.
It's 'cause you understand me better than anyone.
Mm-hmm.
So quit acting like you're the screw-up and get on my level, El.
You did it.
You did when the world was on the line, now do it for yourself.
I don't know if I want to get on your level knowing that you jacked off Todd.
- I did not.
- Yeah, you did.
I did not.
[LOUD BANGING ON DOOR.]
The hell? Coming.
[NONSTOP KNOCKING ON DOOR.]
Oh, thank God! I've tried every other magical Penthouse in the city and Todd.
Wh uh, what Why are you here? I need your help.
Something just happened that feels way above my pay grade, and you were the first person I thought of who could help me handle it.
Okay, it's a weird one.
Just hear me out, okay? So this pig dude who kind of looks like that one guy Paul Giamatti played in that one show with all the wigs told me I'm supposed to do a quest.
Seriously? That asshole went to you? Wow.
Ha.
Yeah, he's extremely committed to finding a dude.
Yeah, it's fine, Todd.
We fixed it.
- Are you sure? - Yeah, yes, I'm sure.
The Harmonic Convergence isn't happening anymore.
[STUTTERS.]
The who now? The end of the world? Uh, no.
He did say the end of something but not that.
He was talking about Fillory.
Remind me, is Fillory real? [SOFT DRAMATIC MUSIC.]
The end of Fillory? So so we saved the wrong world? So we're not done.
Of course.
[SOFT, DRAMATIC MUSIC.]