Teen Titans Go! (2013) s05e07 Episode Script

My Name Is Jose

1 [ANIMAL SOUNDS.]
Go! [TITLE MUSIC.]
T E E N T I T A N S Teen Titans let's go [scratching.]
T-TEEN, T-TEE-TEEN Teen Titans, go! [TITANS YELLING PLAYFULLY.]
[MUSIC.]
[CYBORG SCATTING.]
I's gotta stop that Lex Luthor, yo! I will use the vision of the X-rays to see through this wall.
[IMITATING LASER BEAM SOUND.]
[SCREAMS.]
He must be on the other side of this tall building.
You're about to be taken out, fool! [GRUNTS.]
BOTH: Single bound! - Whoo! - All right! [ROBIN GRUNTS.]
I knocked the building over with my super strength.
ALL: Super strength! What are you doing? We's pretending to be superheroes, Mama.
Uh, you are superheroes.
Yes, but we are pretending to be the good superhero.
The best superhero ever.
Superman! Even his name is super.
And he's got them superpowers, yo.
We all have superpowers.
[GRUNTS.]
But Superman has cool powers.
- We're bored with ours.
- Bored? You're bored being an awesome half-robot who can transform into anything? The only thing I can't transform into is an interesting hero.
[SIGHS IN EXASPERATION.]
Beast Boy, you can turn into a dinosaur.
True, true.
But mostly as a donkey.
[NEIGHS.]
Yeah, that's what's up.
Starfire, you can shoot lasers out of your hands.
Oh, the big [EXCLAIMING.]
And Robin you've got great hair.
Not as great as Superman.
Look at that tight curl.
Come on, guys, we're awesome heroes, and we should be happy with our powers.
Well, we's not.
I would take any other hero's superpowers in a second.
Seriously, there are a lot of heroes with stupid powers, you know.
Anything is better than nothing.
Raven, you can use your magical spells to give us the powers of the other superheroes.
Yes, I can, but if I do this Be warned.
[MUSIC.]
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[MOCKINGLY.]
"Be careful what you wish for.
" We know.
- Just give us them powers, Mama.
- Okay.
Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos! [SCREAMING.]
[GASPING.]
[SCREAMING.]
[SCREAMING.]
Um, did it work? We look exactly the same.
You didn't ask for new costumes, just new powers.
So whose superpowers did I get? I've given you Aqualad's powers.
You can breathe underwater and talk to fish.
[MUSIC.]
- Oh, man, that sounds boring.
- Try it and see.
[GRUNTS.]
- What up, fish? - My name is José.
Cool, man.
That fish has no personality, man.
How am I gonna [GASPS.]
[CHOKING.]
Gills? [SHRIEKS.]
Bath tub! Gotta get to a bath tub! [SCREAMING.]
What about me? I can fly, right? [GROANS.]
I gave you Vibe's powers.
You can create shock waves by breakdancing.
That's whack.
I was already a [VOCALIZES.]
fresh breakdancer.
- Not so much.
- No.
[LAUGHS.]
Oh, look at this one.
Oh, I got [SCREAMING.]
[SPLASHES.]
Uh, something's up with my dome, Mama.
It's got all these thoughts and feelings in it.
That's because I gave you Saturn Girl's powers.
Aw, man.
You's give me the power of thinking? Everyone knows the superhero with feelings powers is always sent in a trap.
I's not fun anymore.
Can I at least control people's minds? Nope, just thinking and feeling.
[CRYING.]
Why!? Why are my limbs doing the wiggles? You've got Plastic Man's powers.
Ooh, the stretchy.
[SHRIEKING.]
[SCREAMING.]
[SPLASH.]
Hey! [TELEPHONE RINGING.]
[SCREAMS.]
I do not like the wiggles.
[GRUNTS.]
This is lame.
We all got stupid powers.
Not me.
I got Superman's powers.
- What? - No fair.
Man, that's the opposite of stupid.
Well, when you learn to cast spells, you can be Superman.
Ooh, can you give me the spell casting powers instead of thinking? Nope, you're gonna have to live with your dumb new powers.
Maybe you'll learn how awesome your real powers are.
Now, I'm gonna use my heat vision to warm up a burrito.
Huh? I's can only think about heating up a burrito.
[GRUNTING.]
[FARTS.]
[SOBBING.]
Ah, it's still cold.
[SAD MUSIC.]
[BOTH CRYING.]
Titans, these powers may be dumb, but they're real powers.
From real heroes.
I'm sure by learning to use them, we'll see their value.
- Oh, yes.
- Oh, I got it.
- Perhaps in time.
- I don't like it, but okay.
[HIP-HOP MUSIC.]
[SCREAMING.]
Whoo, I'm floating! Ah! So, what do you like to do for fun? My name is José.
[GIGGLING.]
Woo-hoo! [TELEPHONE RINGING.]
Sorry, you have the wrong number.
- My name is José.
- Whoo! [LAUGHS.]
[ALARM BLARES.]
ALL: Proficiency! So, how are the new powers working out? - They're great.
- What? You heards right.
I've been dodging trucks all day.
I didn't get hurt once.
I do not mind the silly noodles.
[GIGGLES.]
Yeah, I'm keeping the fish-talking powers.
- My name is José.
- Ha-ha! You are the man.
Are you kidding me? I gave you guys the stupidest powers ever! You might have given us stupid powers, - but at least they're different.
- Yeah, it's a nice change of pace.
[ALARM BLARING.]
ROBIN: Crime alert.
Looks like Gizmo is staging a robot invasion from a floating fortress.
Titans, go! Hey, Titans.
What's wrong with your powers? Shouldn't you be a donkey or something, Beast Boy? [LAUGHS.]
I gots me some new thinking powers, you little fool.
And I have the power of the stretchy body parts.
And I could talk to fish.
- My name is - Not now, José.
So you switched your powers for lame powers? [LAUGHS.]
That's right, Gizmo.
We were desperate for a change.
- That's dumb.
- RAVEN: I'll handle this.
Stand down, Gizmo.
You are no match for me now that I have Superman's powers.
Ooh, I sensing that you gots to watch out for that Kryptonite, Superman Mama.
[CHUCKLES.]
What are the chances of Gizmo having Kryptonite? [YELLS.]
Kryptonite, my only weakness.
Why do you think Superman doesn't mess with me? Ah! You's gotta change us back, Mama.
We cannot defeat the Gizmo with the terrible powers.
Too weak.
Can't change your powers back.
What are we gonna do? Titans, listen.
Aqualad, Saturn Girl, Vibe and Plastic Man might have dumb powers, but if they can use them to defeat villains, so can we.
Starfire, slingshot! [SCREAMS.]
Throw! [LAUGHS.]
You think you can defeat me with dancing? They don't call it breakdance for nothing.
[EXCLAIMS.]
Hey.
Get him.
My name is José.
Aah! Shoo! Go away! Good job, José.
You will be doing the long stretch in the prison, Gizmo.
[GIGGLES.]
[SCREAMS.]
Oops.
[SCREAMING.]
[SIGHS.]
What good is being Superman if you're knocked out by a Kryptonite ray? I think I've got enough power to change us back.
Nah, Mama, we's good.
I likes all this thinkings and feelings.
Any powers are better than none.
I very much enjoy the wiggles.
- And I got a new best friend.
- My name is José.
- It sure is.
- We got lucky this time.
What are the chances that we'll find another battle uniquely suited to your stupid powers? Whoa.
I sensing a new danger.
There's trouble at an underwater electric eel dance competition, and nobody can reach the phone to call for help.
That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard.
Maybe, Raven.
But today, we learned that it doesn't matter what powers we have, there will always be a convenient situation where our incredibly specific powers will be surprisingly effective.
Whatever.
As long as I get to be Superman.
ALL: Woo-hoo! My name is José.
[THEME MUSIC.]

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