Bewitched (1964) s05e09 Episode Script

All right.
Come on.
Sweetheart, you run off and have a good time, okay? - Okay.
- Honey, remember.
No funny business.
- Okay, Mommy.
- Promise? - Yes.
All right.
Go on.
Morning, Mrs.
Gurney.
Ladies.
- Beautiful day, isn't it? - Lovely.
I was just telling the girls I can't believe what's happening to the price of bacon.
And red onions, don't forget the red onions.
I just don't even buy them anymore.
So my salads don't look so pretty.
- I bet you can't.
- I can too.
- You can't.
- I can.
- I dare you.
- I won't.
- I double dare you.
- No.
That proves you can't do it.
Tabitha, you promised.
No fooling around.
He dared me.
I don't care if you get a zillion dares.
You slide down a slide.
You don't slide up a slide.
- But he dared me.
- No buts.
- Now, promise.
No more.
- I promise.
All right.
Come on.
That's better.
Okay, Charlie, let's start behind the fountain.
Okay, girls.
I guess you're gonna have to clear out of here for a while.
Why? What's going on? Little bit to the left, Charlie.
Would Would you mind telling us what's happening? As of tomorrow this park is officially closed.
- Closed? - Okay, raise it a little.
- But why? - Lady, I don't know why.
Maybe so your kids won't get in the way of the bulldozers when they start levelling off this place for the shopping centre.
What shopping centre? But this is a public park.
It says so right on that plaque.
"Dedicated to the city by Colonel Nathan R.
Mossler.
" All I know is what I read in the papers.
Seems like they had a little dipsy down at city hall.
This ground was leased to the city for $1 a year and the city goofed.
They forgot to send in the dollar.
- That's terrible.
- That's life.
Young Mossler decided to take back his grandfather's park and turn it into a shopping centre.
But Charlie, let's move to the second position.
Well, the park gone, just like that.
- It's outrageous.
- They call it progress.
Well, it's wrong.
The kids need this park.
It's the only one in the neighbourhood.
There's no use getting excited.
Like they say, you can't fight city hall.
Well, I don't care what they say.
I'm going to fight, just as soon as I find out one thing.
- What's that? - How do you fight city hall? - Hi, sweetheart.
- Hi, darling.
Can I fix you a drink? No, no, I can fix it myself.
No, sweetheart, I'll do it.
I'll do it.
I want you in a nice, relaxed mood when Oh-oh, what? Oh-oh, the last time you wanted me relaxed was just before you told me that your mother had brought Tabitha a unicorn.
- Darrin, I resent that.
- So did I.
Sweetheart, what I'm trying to tell you about is very, very mortal.
It's so mortal, in fact, that I don't understand it.
Okay, what is it? Well, Tabitha and I went to the park today and I found out that starting tomorrow the park is going to be replaced with a shopping centre.
Well, that's progress, I guess.
That's what Mrs.
Bentley said.
I think it's disgraceful, and I'm gonna do something.
- Honey, relax.
- Yeah, okay.
Now, listen to this.
The city leased that property for $1 a year and forgot to send the dollar.
Now doesn't that sound peculiar to you? Not really.
Civic affairs are sometimes made up of very mysterious arrangements.
Well, they are not going to make this arrangement.
Don't you want Tabitha and the other children to have that park? Yes.
Then you admit it's wrong to close the park.
- Well, yeah.
- Then you'll help? - I didn't say that.
- But you will? - Okay.
Okay.
- Good.
Now, what's the first step? The first step? Well, I guess the first step would be to make an appointment with your councilman.
- That's what Mrs.
Gurney said.
- And? - We have an appointment.
- Good.
On Tuesday, April 15, 1997.
- What? - At 2:30.
Come on, Sam.
Well, honey, it might as well be.
His calendar's booked up to six weeks in advance.
So how about step two? Well, if you can't see your councilman I guess the next step is to take your case to the people.
- The people? - You know, organize.
You You mean organize a protest march or something? You have to be careful how you go about - With picket signs and all that stuff? - Just a minute.
You're right.
I'm going to do it.
Why, there must be a hundred mothers who feel just as angry as I do about losing that park.
They just need a leader.
Someone who'll fight to the last blade of grass to the last grain of sand in the sandbox.
It's just Willow Street Park, not Dunkirk.
I know.
I know, but that's just the way I feel.
It's a matter of principle, a question of integrity.
You know, I'm very proud of you.
Most people accept things just the way they are.
They hope somebody else does something about it.
You know something? You're a witch in a million.
Well, thank you.
You're welcome.
I'm sorry, but we are not moving, not one inch, are we, ladies? We want our park, so you get out of here now.
Ladies, please, for the last time, okay? Please move out of the way.
You're trespassing on private property.
All right, ladies, close ranks.
Mrs.
Stephens, look this way.
That's it.
Look mad.
Good.
Ladies, please.
What do you want me to do, lose my job? You want me to lose my job.
Okay.
You've had it.
You've had it.
That's it.
That's it.
We're through.
Ready or not, I'm going through.
That's it.
You wouldn't dare.
Oh, yeah? Just watch my dust, all right? Okay, Jeff, follow me, nice and slow.
What the? Looks like somebody somewhere is on our side.
You want me to call the cops? No, you better call the boss.
Let him sweat it out.
I've had it.
I've made enough enemies down here let alone up there.
Here comes Mossler.
This will be good.
Well, well, what's going on here? Got a little problem, have we? Yes, I'll say we have.
- Those mothers won't budge.
- Say we have no right to close the park.
Oh, well, they just don't know all the facts.
Who's the leader? The blond one in the middle.
- Let me show you how to handle this.
- Good.
Hi, there.
My name's Harlan Mossler.
I'm the owner of this property.
There seems to be a little misunderstanding.
It could get bigger.
Now wait a minute.
I'm a family man myself.
I love kids.
Well, then, kindly ask these gentlemen to vacate the premises and we'll all be happy.
- Yeah.
- Give it to him, Samantha.
- Hit him where it hurts.
Okay, boys.
Let's call it a day.
You're giving up? You're gonna let us have the park? No, no, on the contrary.
I need time to get a court injunction which means if you persist in obstructing these men l'm gonna have each of you thrown in jail.
Now, if you'll pardon me, I must be rushing on.
Nice chatting with you.
What are we gonna do now? We're gonna keep right on picketing.
Didn't you hear? He said he's gonna have us thrown in jail.
Yes, I know.
I know, but don't worry.
- There's always step three.
- What's that? I don't know.
But I'll think of something.
Darrin, you old son of gun, we've done it again.
This Easy Way Rent-A-Car presentation is a masterpiece.
Just don't hog all the credit this time, huh, Lar? - Let's make it 50-50 right down the line.
- Done.
I'll even go you one better, Darrin.
If H.
B.
Doesn't like it, it's all yours.
I wonder where he is? It isn't like him to be late.
Must be him now.
Yes? Good.
Send him on in.
Now remember, all smiles.
That's how happy we are about our presentation.
- Thank you.
- Come in.
Come in, H.
B.
- You know Darrin Stephens.
- Yes, Stephens.
I'm sorry to be late.
I had some business to attend to.
Everything all right I hope? Yes.
I saw to that.
Can you imagine? Women were picketing the site of my new shopping centre.
We never should have given them the vote.
Troublemakers, that's what they are.
Like I always say, give the housewives all those modern appliances and they have more time on their hands than they know what to do with.
Right, Darrin? Yes.
Yes, indeedy.
Sam.
- Hi, sweetheart.
- Hi, darling.
How goes the battle? You're not gonna believe what happened today.
I think I will.
It's not all good.
I'll believe that too.
Well, what happened was we won today's battle but tomorrow the war may get a little sticky.
The owner of the property said he's gonna get an injunction.
And if we show up tomorrow, he's gonna have us all thrown in jail.
- Can he do that? - I was afraid that might happen.
There's only one thing to do.
- Stay in there and fight, right? - Wrong.
I suggest an immediate and strategic retreat.
I refuse to be intimidated.
I'm gonna keep right on going.
You're gonna keep right on going, all right, to jail.
I don't care.
And now that I have whipped up my courage I think I'll finish whipping up dinner.
I know, honey.
It's an admirable cause, admirable.
But the fact remains the city goofed and there's nothing anyone can do about it.
You women are trespassing on private property.
Darrin, I told you.
I am perfectly willing to go to jail, if that's what it takes.
Sweetheart, you've got to look at the whole picture.
Step back and look at the big canvas.
A lot of people stand to benefit from a shopping centre.
And let's not forget, the city has a budget problem.
It needs all the property taxes it can collect.
Darrin, what's gotten into you? You're the one that told me I should stand up for my principles no matter what.
- Yes, of course, and it still goes.
Except that every once in a while a bigger principle comes along that's even more important.
Like what? Like the principle of providing food and shelter for one's loved ones.
Darrin, how about telling me what you're not telling me? Sam, do you happen to know who Harlan Mossler is? Yes.
He's a very selfish man.
If he is, it's his hobby.
He makes his living as the owner of Easy Way Rent-A-Car one of McMann & Tate's biggest clients.
What does that got to do with it? He's also the owner of the SavMost Market chain.
Good.
- I'm glad you told me.
- I thought you would be.
Now I can tell my fellow protesters not to shop there.
- And then there's - I thought we dropped it.
- Listen to me.
- It's no use.
My mind is made up.
I forbid you to go down to that park tomorrow! - Hypocrite.
- Sorehead.
Sam? Sam, are you in the kitchen? Look, Sam.
Enough "Breakfast on table.
Aunt Hagatha babysitting in nursery.
I'm at the park sitting in front of a bulldozer.
Over.
Down with hypocrites.
" Good morning, Darrin.
And don't give me that " Larry, what are you doing here?" routine.
Larry, what are you doing here? Then you haven't seen the morning paper? No, why? Look for yourself.
I underlined the part that says: "The leader and organizer is Mrs.
Darrin Stephens.
" Well? Well, I must say Sam takes an excellent picture.
Is that all you can say? Your wife is biting the hand that feeds us and all you can say is that? Come on, Larry.
So Sam's all fired-up about something that's important to any mother.
- It'll blow over.
- Sure, it will.
What's Sam trying to do, put us out of business? Larry, take it easy.
Even if Mossler sees the paper, he's not gonna read the fine print.
Maybe that's Sam now.
- Hello? - Stephens.
This is Harlan Mossler.
I've just been looking at the morning paper.
Hi, there, Mr.
Mossler.
- Yes, I know all - Let me talk to him.
Hi, H.
B.
Larry Tate here.
I was just dropping by to pick Darrin up.
What seems to be the problem? What's that? No, I had no idea.
Samantha Stephens? Furthermore, she's right back at it this morning.
Now, Tate, all I've got to say is there had better be an explanation.
Don't worry about a thing, H.
B.
Stephens is on his way out the door right now.
Says who? Now, now, Darrin, no offence.
Look, I'm married to a real nut myself.
- Larry, let's not get personal - Now, now, you know what I mean.
Sam's so upset about losing a little park that she doesn't realize she's standing in the way of progress.
She should step back, take a look at the overall picture.
After all, a lot of people stand to benefit from a shopping centre.
That's just what I told Sam.
There, you see? Then we agree.
- No, no, we don't.
- But you just said that When I said that to Sam, I didn't like the sound of it.
And when I hear it from you, I like it even less.
If knocking down a park for a shopping centre is progress l'm a monkey's uncle! - Watch it, Darrin.
With those long arms, you're leaving yourself wide open.
I don't care.
I'm going down there.
Attaboy.
Now, you're talking.
I'll say I am.
I'm gonna give Sam all the moral support I can, late as it is.
First, I'll get dressed.
Mrs.
Stephens? Your husband will be here in a few moments.
And if he's not man enough to handle his wife's behaviour then he's not man enough to handle my advertising account.
- That's blackmail.
- No, that's sound business.
Hi, honey.
Mr.
Mossler.
Ladies.
If you two would like to chat I'll give you exactly one minute.
- He can do it in 30 seconds.
- It won't take that long.
You don't have to say a word.
I've decided to back down.
No, you're not.
You're gonna stay right here and fight.
Stephens, is this some kind of monstrous joke? What are you doing? Like the sign says, happy children mean a happy tomorrow.
- Stephens, that does it.
- Yes, Stephens.
As of this moment, you are no longer with McMann & Tate.
Fine.
That's just fine with me.
I'm sorry.
Nothing personal, but business is business.
Right, H.
B.
? Right is right and wrong is wrong and never the Tate, will you stop babbling? Right.
I'm with you, H.
B.
We've said enough already.
Mr.
Mossler, before you do anything drastic l'd like to ask you one question.
What's that? Your grandfather there, the one who said happy children mean a happy tomorrow what do you think he'd say if he knew you were closing this park for your own selfish gain? - Forget it, honey.
You can't reach him.
- Now, wait a minute.
I want to hear what Mr.
Mossler has to say.
Really, Mrs.
Stephens, whatever my grandfather may say is irrelevant.
I'm not surprised at you, Harlan.
I guess it's my fault, because I gave you too much.
Sam, what's the matter with him? I guess he's thinking it over.
- Did you see that? - See what? What? - What's the matter, H.
B.
? - Nothing.
The sun must be hotter than I think.
You were a spoiled brat as a child and now you're a greedy, spoiled brat as a man.
- Don't you hear anything? - No.
Hey, stand up straight when I'm talking to you.
- Are you all right, H.
B.
? - Yes.
I've been thinking about these fine ladies and their fine children and the need for this park that my grandfather so graciously donated.
- I was thinking about that too.
- Mrs.
Stephens, ladies I have reconsidered this matter.
And in the tradition of the late Colonel Nathan "Ramrod" Mossler although it costs me great personal loss I hereby rededicate this park to the children of this community.
Beautiful.
Think of the mileage we can get out of the publicity.
Oh, Tate, will you shut up? Mr.
Mossler, somehow I always knew that deep down you were a Mossler through and through.
And, Stephens, I hereby award you all the advertising accounts of Mossler Enterprises.
Thank you, sir.
If you'll excuse me, ladies.
I have to run now.
Let's go! We won.
You did it.
Well, welcome back to McMann & Tate.
I don't know, Larry.
With the entire Mossler account, I could start my own agency.
I only said that you were no longer with us in the hope that Mossler would realize what a selfish stand he was taking.
- Larry, would you like to explain that? - No.
Okay, Larry, everything's back to normal.
Thanks to you, you son of a gun.
You know, I wonder what came over him to make him change his mind? - I wonder.
- Me too.
Honey? Sam, what's the matter? Nothing.
It was just the sun.
Must be hotter than I think.