Ed, Edd n Eddy (1999) s05e09 Episode Script
All Eds Are Off/Smile for the Ed
1
[WHISTLING] >> ED!
>> EDD! >> EDDY!
>> BRRR, YEAH!
>> SWIMMING CLASS
CERTAINLY IS AN INVIGORATING WAY.
TO START THE DAY.
DON'T YOU AGREE, EDDY?
>> [SNORING] AAH!
THE DAM'S BURST!
MAN THE LIFEBOAT!
WOMEN AND ME FIRST!
THIS EARLY MORNING
STUFF'S KILLING ME.
HEY, WATCH IT, AHAB!
I'M TRYING TO CATCH
A FEW WINKS HERE.
>> ED, IS THA
GRAVY YOU'RE CONSUMING?
>> [WHISTLE]
>> MY TURN!
OH, SILLY ME.
I DROPPED MY READY
INSTANT GRAVY MIX.
GOOD THING IT DIDN'
OPEN UP, HUH, GUYS?
>> ED, YOU'VE CONTAMINATED
THE POOL WITH A THICKENED.
GELATO OF MEAT DRIPPINGS.
>> THERE'S
PLENTY FOR EVERYONE.
WHO NEEDS A LADLE?
>> OH, MAN, I THINK
I LEFT THAT ON THE BUS.
>> [MUTTERING] >>
I'VE GOT GRAVY IN MY EAR.
>> GREAT!
SO I END UP WITH A DETENTION
BECAUSE OF YOUR STUPID
EATING HABITS.
>> IS IT THA
TIME ALREADY?
OOH, GRAVY CAKES.
YUM.
[CHEWING] >>
EXCUSE ME, ED,
BUT DON'T YOU FEEL
THIS DAILY DIET OF GRAVY
MAY BECOME DETRIMENTAL
TO YOUR HEALTH?
[ENGINE SPUTTERS AND STARTS]
>> I SWEAR HE'S OBSESSED.
WITH THE STUFF.
IT'S STASHED HERE.
HIDES IT THERE.
I BET YOU COULDN'T GO
A LOUSY DAY WITHOU
YOUR LOUSY GRAVY, ED.
>> SAYS YOU.
>> SO PROVE IT!
>> AAH!
YOUR VOICE IS LIKE TOOTHPICKS
IN MY DRUMSTICKS, EDDY!
>> I AGREE, ED.
I'VE ALWAYS WISHED EDDY
COULD COMMUNICATE WITH
A TONE OF VOICE THAT DIDN'
RATTLE THE TIMBERS OF EVERY
HOUSE IN A 4 BLOCK VICINITY.
>> DON'T TOUCH
THAT DIAL, KIDS.
>> WHAT ABOU
YOU, MR. ENCYCLOPEDIAC?
I BET I COULD STOP YELLING
WAY BEFORE YOU COULD STOP
USING THOSE BIG, FANCY
SCHMANCY WORDS OF YOURS.
>> PLANK SAYS DOUBLE D
WOULD GO WACKY IF HE ONLY USED.
WORDS WITH ONE SYLLABLE.
>> HA!
EVEN THE DOORSTOP'S
GOT YOU PEGGED.
>> AW, DORK, DORK, AND
DORKY ARE HAVING A LITTLE TIFF.
AIN'T IT PRECIOUS?
[LAUGHING] WHAT DORKS.
>> ALWAYS WITH THIS
DUCK WORD, YES, KEVIN BOY?
ROLF WOULD WAGER HIS LOVE
OF MAMMAL FLESH AND 25 CENTS
THAT YOU CANNOT RENOUNCE
THIS LABEL FOR THE MIXED NUTS
ED BOYS.
>> 25 CENTS?
>> WHAT?
I CAN GIVE UP SAYING
DORK JUST LIKE THAT.
>> THINK YOU COULD GO A
WHOLE DAY WITHOUT THAT CHUNK.
OF TERMITE FOOD
TELLING YOU WHAT TO DO?
>> EASY PEASY
LEMON SQUEEZEY, EDDY.
RIGHT, PLANK?
>> SOUNDS LIKE WE
GOT OURSELVES A BET.
SO WHAT DO YOU SAY, BOYS?
YOU IN OR WHAT?
>> I'M IN.
>> ROLF WILL PARTAKE.
>> THIS IS
GONNA BE A HOOT.
>> NO GRAVY OR BUST.
>> VERY WELL THEN.
I WELCOME THE CHALLENGE
TO MY VAST RESOURCE OF
>> YO, NAZZ.
WANT IN ON THIS ACTION?
>> AS IF.
>> THEN MAY
THE BEST AHEM
GENTLEMAN WIN.
[BELL RINGS] >> [GRUNTS]
>> WATCH WHERE
YOU'RE GOING, FISH FACE!
>> HI-LO!
>> AHEM.
NICE TRY, WINDBAG.
>> JEEPERS, SARAH.
WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?
>> JIMMY!
QUICK!
TELL ME TO DO
SOMETHING, ANYTHING!
>> OH, OK.
UM, DO MY MATH HOMEWORK FOR ME.
[MONKEY CHATTERING] >>
I'M MY OWN PERSON, PLANK.
>> CHECK I
OUT, SHAKESPEARE.
WITHOUT PLANK, GNOME-HEAD'S
FALLING APART, BEGGING
TO GET BOSSED AROUND.
READY TO CHICKEN OUT?
[CHICKEN SQUAWKS]
>> NO. NOT AT ALL.
IT IS FUN TO
SPEAK IN SMALL WORDS ALL DAY.
NOT HARD ONE BIT.
[HORN HONKS] [HORSE WHINNIES]
>> DOUBLE D
HOW MUCH LONGER?
MUST ME EAT GRAVY.
AND BE AS ONE.
OH, THE SUFFERING!
>> [CHUCKLING]
[BELL RINGS]
>> KNOCK IT OFF, YA!
UM, YOU KNOW.
[HORSE WHINNIES] >>
DON'T, UM PUSH, ED-DY.
YOU ARE NOT OH FAIR.
>> HERE YOU GO, EDDY.
[ROOSTER CROWS] WASHED,
DARNED, AND STATIC-FREE.
I'M NOT LISTENING TO YOU.
>> TABLE KIND
OF TASTES LIKE GRAVY.
>> FORGET THE GRAVY, ED.
HERE.
GNAW ON THIS.
>> MASHED POTATOES.
NO GRAVY?
>> NICE CATCH, YA DORK!
DORK, DORK.
DORKY, DORKY, DORK!
[BONES CRACKING]
MAN, THAT FELT GOOD.
>> MUST FOLD SOCKS.
>> LET'S SEE HERE.
CONSCIENT-IOUS?
WHAT KIND OF BUNK WORD IS THAT?
OH, HERE'S ANOTHER ONE.
TEMPER-A-MENTAL.
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU,
BUT THAT'S JUST PLAIN STUPID.
>> STOP!
I WILL NOT TOLERATE YOUR
SINGLE-HANDED ANNIHILATION
YOUR OWN MONETARY GAIN, EDDY.
>> THINK, JONNY, THINK.
JUST MAKE UP YOUR MIND.
>> WHAT'S THAT, PLANK?
YOU WANT ME TO WHAT?
MOVE ALL YOUR STUFF TO MY HOUSE?
YOU WANT TO BOSS
ME AROUND INSTEAD
AND HANG OUT WITH SOMEONE
WITH A NORMAL-SIZED HEAD?
YOU'RE A RIOT, PAL O' MINE.
>> NOBODY TAKES ORDERS
FROM THIS CHUNK OF TERMITE FOOD.
EXCEPT ME!
NUTS TO YOUR STUPID
BET, HOME WRECKER.
>> THANK YOU,
JONNY THE WOOD BOY.
ROLF COULD NOT FIND THE
STRENGTH TO OPEN THE DOOR.
>> GRAVY?
>> I'VE GOT LOVE
IN MY TUMMY, SARAH.
>> ME, TOO, JIMMY.
>> MMM! MEATY.
[PIG SNORTING] YEP.
REAL MEATY MEAT.
>> THE GAMES HAVE ENDED.
ROLF CAN NO LONGER RESIS
THE SWEET FLESH DRAPED IN FA
LIKE PAPA'S THERAPEUTIC TRUSS.
>> IT IS YOU!
COME TO ED.
BELLY MISSES YOU.
>> ED, STOP!
YOU AND EDDY ARE THE
ONLY ONES LEFT IN THE BET.
>> [BURPS] >> I WIN!
HA HA HA!
AM I LOUD ENOUGH
FOR YOU, DOUBLE D?
HOW ABOUT NOW?!
NO?!
HOW ABOUT NOW?!
>> UH-OH.
BUTTERSCOTCH.
>> BUTTER-WHAT?
>> OH, WOULD
YOU LOOK AT THAT.
IT'S FUN WITH BUTTERSCOTCH
PUDDING TUESDAY TODAY.
IT'S NOT GRAVY AFTER ALL.
>> NOT GRAVY?
[CHICKEN SQUAWKS]
>> $1.25 EXACTLY.
CONGRATULATIONS.
I DO HOPE THIS EASES
THE DISCOMFORT A TAD.
WHO WOULD HAVE KNOWN YOU
WERE ALLERGIC TO BUTTERSCOTCH
PUDDING?
>> NOT ME, DOUBLE D.
>> WHAT'S BLOAT HEAD
GONNA DO WITH THAT CASH?
>> SEE?
>> A GRAVY CATALOGUE.
>> THERE'S MEXICAN HOT TAMALE
GRAVY AND SCOTTISH HAGGIS GRAVY.
SWISS CHEESE CHICKEN GRAVY.
YUM.
>> OH, COME ON!
YOU'RE GONNA SPEND THE
MONEY ON MORE GRAVY?
>> IRONY, EDDY.
LOOK THAT UP IN THE DICTIONARY.
>> OH, YEAH?
WELL, LOOKIE HERE.
I GOT ME SOME BUTTERSCOTCH
PUDDING WITH ED'S NAME ON IT.
HOW'S THAT FOR IRONING?
HA!
HA!
[CAT SCREECHES] >> JUS
A DASH OF HAUTE COUTURE.
FOR MY SCHOOL PORTRAIT, SARAH.
>> EW!
>> OH, GROSS!
>> WOW, PLANK, YOU AND
JIMMY ORDERED CLOTHES FROM.
THE SAME CATALOGUE.
HOW COOL IS THAT?
>> I'M SO GENERIC.
AAH!
[HORSE WHINNIES] >>
NAW, TOO GAME SHOW HOST.
OFF MODEL.
[BURPS] >> DID
YOU FORGET TO BRUSH.
YOUR TEETH, EDDY?
>> PERPETUATING
OUR VANITY, ARE WE?
>> WE'RE PRACTICING FOR
MY SCHOOL PHOTO, SOCK HEAD.
[SHEEP BLEATS]
>> I'M SO PRETTY.
OH, SO PRETTY.
>> DON'T YOU THINK YOUR
PARENTS WILL BE A TAD UPSET WITH.
A PHOTO OF YOU WITH
A SNAIL ON YOUR HEAD?
>> YOU'RE AN IDIOT, ED.
GUESS WHO'S GETTING TO MOVE
INTO HIS BIG BROTHER'S COOL
BEDROOM?
HERE'S A HINT: ME!
>> I WON!
>> REALLY?
>> REALLY.
I'M IN LIKE FLINT, SOCK HEAD.
MY MOM JUST WALKED UP
TO ME AND DANGLED HIS KEY
RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME.
SO I LOOKED AT HER LIKE,
"HUH?" AND THEN SHE'S ALL LIKE,
"YOU CAN MOVE INTO YOUR
BROTHER'S OLD BEDROOM
IF THIS YEAR'S SCHOOL
PHOTO IS NICE FOR ONCE, EDDY."
A PERFECT PICTURE AND NO
MORE BABY BROTHER EDDY.
>> WELL,
CONGRATULATIONS, EDDY.
IT SEEMS YOUR PARENTS HAVE
FINALLY RECOGNIZED HOW YOU'VE
GROWN SINCE YOUR
BROTHER'S DEPARTURE.
>> OOH!
WHOA!
>> MAKE SURE YOU
GET MY GOOD SIDE, BOZO!
>> I GUESS THA
RULES OUT HER FACE THEN.
>> OH! THIS STUPID
DRESS IS GIVING ME A RASH.
>> ROLF IS READY TO HAVE
HIS SOUL PILFERED FROM HIS.
VERY EYES, YES?
THANK YOU, YES.
OOH!
>> OHH!
>> WHAT A JOY IT WOULD
BE TO CAPTURE SUCH BEAUTY.
WITH MY HUMBLE CAMERA.
>> MAKE I
QUICK, CUE BALL.
>> WHAT DO YOU MEAN
YOU THINK YOU BLINKED?
>> TIME TO SCORE
MY BRO'S SWEET PAD.
[DRUM ROLL] >> DORK.
[BELL RINGS] >>
I CAN'T GIVE THIS.
TO MY MOM.
I LOOK LIKE I'M GETTING
MY TEMPERATURE TAKEN.
>> SURELY IT'S
NOT THAT BAD, EDDY.
ISN'T YOUR MOTHER FAR-SIGHTED?
>> AW, YOU
LOOK LIKE AN ONION.
MOMS LOVE ONIONS.
>> OH, I'll
GIVE YOU AN ONION.
I WAS SO CLOSE.
I COULD ALMOST SMELL MY
BROTHER'S STUFFED CAMEL.
[FOOTSTEPS] GROAN.
[CHICKEN SQUAWKS] >>
THE TEACHER'S WATCHING US,
EDDY.
[PLAYING OFF-KEY]
>> YOU KNOW, EDDY.
I AM IN THE PHOTOGRAPHY CLUB.
I'll JUST RETAKE YOUR
PHOTO DURING LUNCH.
[METRONOME TICKING]
>> I LIKE THAT.
IT'LL BE LIKE THIS BUM
PHOTO NEVER EXISTED.
HEY, CHARLIE THE
BIRDBRAIN PARKER, EAT THIS.
>> THANKS, EDDY.
[HORSE WHINNIES] >> PSST!
GET A LOAD OF PRUNE FACE.
>> ROLF HAS SEEN PRUNIER.
[BELL RINGS] >> OH, LOOK.
PERHAPS A NOTICE FROM OUR
ESTEEMED SCHOOL FACULTY.
OHH!
>> AIN'T YOU SUPPOSED
TO BE TAKING MY PHOTO?
MY PHOTO!
HUH?
THEY'RE ALL OVER
THE [BELL RINGS] AAH!
>> HA HA HA HA!
>> IT'S A MIRACLE, YES.
FINALLY SOME ED
BOYS MERCHANDISE.
>> IF THAT AIN'T A FASHION
STATEMENT, I DON'T KNOW WHAT IS.
>> SAY SOMETHING
FUNNY ABOUT MY BINDER, KEV.
HEE HEE HEE!
>> UM
>> I KNEW IT.
[HORSE WHINNIES]
>> EDDY, WAIT.
PERHAPS WE SHOULD >>
WE GOT TO DITCH THESE PRONTO.
>> WARN THOSE
FINE LITTLE MEN.
NO, WAIT.
IT'S HORACE.
>> IN HERE, EDD.
>> I THINK I
HAVE A PAPER CUT.
>> BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP.
>> BUT THAT PHOTO
COPIER'S SCHOOL PROPERTY.
STUDENTS USE THAT.
>> IF THAT PHOTO EVER GETS
OUT FOR MY MOM TO SEE, I CAN.
KISS MY BROTHER'S ROOM GOOD-BYE.
I BETCHA THERE'S MORE.
IT'S A NIGHTMARE, I TELL YA.
>> [LAUGHING]
>> MMWA!
STOP KISSING YOURSELF. MMWA!
STOP KISSING YOURSELF.
MMWA!
STOP KISSING YOURSELF.
MMWA!
STOP KISSING YOURSELF.
>> [LAUGHING]
>> HELP ME!
[BIRD CAWS] >> I
THINK WE MAY BE ABLE.
TO SAVE EDDY'S
PROVERBIAL BACON YET.
AHEM.
GOOD AFTERNOON, STUDENTS
OF PEACH CREEK JUNIOR HIGH.
THIS IS YOUR PRINCIPAL SPEAKING
WITH A VERY IMPORTANT, UM,
ANNOUNCEMENT.
VERY GOOD.
AHEM.
ALL COPIES OF STUDENT EDDY'S
SCHOOL PHOTOGRAPH ARE TO BE
RETURNED TO HIM IMMEDIATELY.
FAILURE TO COMPLY WILL
WARRANT DETENTION FOR EVERYONE
FOR THE REST OF THE SEMESTER.
THANK YOU.
>> BUMMER.
>> YOU HEARD THE MAN.
>> AHH.
>> DID I JUST DO THAT?
I DID, DIDN'T I?
I JUST IMPERSONATED
THE PRINCIPAL.
MADE FALSE
DECLARATIONS IN HIS NAME.
OH, WHAT HAVE I DONE?
>> WHOO HOO!
GET THIS, GUYS.
THE PRINCIPAL JUST MADE
EVERYBODY GIVE BACK
ALL THE COPIES OF MY BUM PHOTO.
ME!
WHAT A SAP!
PUT YOUR HELME
NEWTON ON, SOCK HEAD.
WE GOT A PICTURE TO TAKE.
MY BROTHER'S ROOM IS IN THE BAG.
>> NOT IN THE HOUSE, EDDY?
>> DRATS!
DUE TO YESTERDAY'S PHOTOGRAPHY
ASSIGNMENT, I'M AFRAID I ONLY
HAVE ONE LAS
EXPOSURE ON THIS FILM.
>> WHATEVER.
ONE-SHOT EDDY'S MY MIDDLE NAME.
>> MAKE-UP!
>> HOW VERY HELPFUL, ED.
>> OW.
>> READY ON 3.
1 2 >> 3.
OOPS! FORGOT ONE.
HA HA HA!
>> HE DID I
AGAIN, DOUBLE D!
[COPIER HUMMING]
>> LOOK, DOUBLE D.
A PICTURE FOR EDDY. SEE?
HE'S GETTING THE KEY
TO HIS BROTHER'S ROOM,
AND IT'S MADE OF POTATO SALAD.
>> AW, ED.
WHAT A LOVELY GESTURE.
ALTHOUGH, MAYBE YOU SHOULD
GIVE IT TO HIM WHEN HE'S NO
SO UPSET.
>> TALK ABOU
ADDING INSECTS TO INJURY.
TWO HOURS OF STINKING CLEAN-UP.
PLUS A WEEK'S WORTH OF DETENTION
FOR IMPERSONATING THE PRINCIPAL.
I DON'T EVEN
REMEMBER DOING THAT.
>> REALLY?
A WHOLE WEEK?
GRACIOUS.
UM ED HAS SOMETHING
FOR YOU, EDDY.
>> DO I EVER.
IT'S A KEY.
>> HEY!
I AIN'T PULLING A STUPID
FACE IN THIS PICTURE.
THIS'LL WORK FOR
MY SCHOOL PHOTO.
BIG BRO'S ROOM, HERE I COME!
>> I'M FLABBERGASTED, ED.
HE SERIOUSLY THINKS HE
CAN APPEASE HIS MOTHER WITH
A CRAYON DRAWING IN
LIEU OF A SCHOOL PHOTO.
I MEAN, THE LINES
ARE ALL WIGGLY.
>> CAN I DRAW YOUR
SCHOOL PHOTO, DOUBLE D?
>> THANK
YOU, ED, BUT I'M
>> MAKE-UP!
>> NO, WAIT.
SELF-PORTRAIT.
[WHISTLING] >> ED!
>> EDD! >> EDDY!
>> BRRR, YEAH!
>> SWIMMING CLASS
CERTAINLY IS AN INVIGORATING WAY.
TO START THE DAY.
DON'T YOU AGREE, EDDY?
>> [SNORING] AAH!
THE DAM'S BURST!
MAN THE LIFEBOAT!
WOMEN AND ME FIRST!
THIS EARLY MORNING
STUFF'S KILLING ME.
HEY, WATCH IT, AHAB!
I'M TRYING TO CATCH
A FEW WINKS HERE.
>> ED, IS THA
GRAVY YOU'RE CONSUMING?
>> [WHISTLE]
>> MY TURN!
OH, SILLY ME.
I DROPPED MY READY
INSTANT GRAVY MIX.
GOOD THING IT DIDN'
OPEN UP, HUH, GUYS?
>> ED, YOU'VE CONTAMINATED
THE POOL WITH A THICKENED.
GELATO OF MEAT DRIPPINGS.
>> THERE'S
PLENTY FOR EVERYONE.
WHO NEEDS A LADLE?
>> OH, MAN, I THINK
I LEFT THAT ON THE BUS.
>> [MUTTERING] >>
I'VE GOT GRAVY IN MY EAR.
>> GREAT!
SO I END UP WITH A DETENTION
BECAUSE OF YOUR STUPID
EATING HABITS.
>> IS IT THA
TIME ALREADY?
OOH, GRAVY CAKES.
YUM.
[CHEWING] >>
EXCUSE ME, ED,
BUT DON'T YOU FEEL
THIS DAILY DIET OF GRAVY
MAY BECOME DETRIMENTAL
TO YOUR HEALTH?
[ENGINE SPUTTERS AND STARTS]
>> I SWEAR HE'S OBSESSED.
WITH THE STUFF.
IT'S STASHED HERE.
HIDES IT THERE.
I BET YOU COULDN'T GO
A LOUSY DAY WITHOU
YOUR LOUSY GRAVY, ED.
>> SAYS YOU.
>> SO PROVE IT!
>> AAH!
YOUR VOICE IS LIKE TOOTHPICKS
IN MY DRUMSTICKS, EDDY!
>> I AGREE, ED.
I'VE ALWAYS WISHED EDDY
COULD COMMUNICATE WITH
A TONE OF VOICE THAT DIDN'
RATTLE THE TIMBERS OF EVERY
HOUSE IN A 4 BLOCK VICINITY.
>> DON'T TOUCH
THAT DIAL, KIDS.
>> WHAT ABOU
YOU, MR. ENCYCLOPEDIAC?
I BET I COULD STOP YELLING
WAY BEFORE YOU COULD STOP
USING THOSE BIG, FANCY
SCHMANCY WORDS OF YOURS.
>> PLANK SAYS DOUBLE D
WOULD GO WACKY IF HE ONLY USED.
WORDS WITH ONE SYLLABLE.
>> HA!
EVEN THE DOORSTOP'S
GOT YOU PEGGED.
>> AW, DORK, DORK, AND
DORKY ARE HAVING A LITTLE TIFF.
AIN'T IT PRECIOUS?
[LAUGHING] WHAT DORKS.
>> ALWAYS WITH THIS
DUCK WORD, YES, KEVIN BOY?
ROLF WOULD WAGER HIS LOVE
OF MAMMAL FLESH AND 25 CENTS
THAT YOU CANNOT RENOUNCE
THIS LABEL FOR THE MIXED NUTS
ED BOYS.
>> 25 CENTS?
>> WHAT?
I CAN GIVE UP SAYING
DORK JUST LIKE THAT.
>> THINK YOU COULD GO A
WHOLE DAY WITHOUT THAT CHUNK.
OF TERMITE FOOD
TELLING YOU WHAT TO DO?
>> EASY PEASY
LEMON SQUEEZEY, EDDY.
RIGHT, PLANK?
>> SOUNDS LIKE WE
GOT OURSELVES A BET.
SO WHAT DO YOU SAY, BOYS?
YOU IN OR WHAT?
>> I'M IN.
>> ROLF WILL PARTAKE.
>> THIS IS
GONNA BE A HOOT.
>> NO GRAVY OR BUST.
>> VERY WELL THEN.
I WELCOME THE CHALLENGE
TO MY VAST RESOURCE OF
>> YO, NAZZ.
WANT IN ON THIS ACTION?
>> AS IF.
>> THEN MAY
THE BEST AHEM
GENTLEMAN WIN.
[BELL RINGS] >> [GRUNTS]
>> WATCH WHERE
YOU'RE GOING, FISH FACE!
>> HI-LO!
>> AHEM.
NICE TRY, WINDBAG.
>> JEEPERS, SARAH.
WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?
>> JIMMY!
QUICK!
TELL ME TO DO
SOMETHING, ANYTHING!
>> OH, OK.
UM, DO MY MATH HOMEWORK FOR ME.
[MONKEY CHATTERING] >>
I'M MY OWN PERSON, PLANK.
>> CHECK I
OUT, SHAKESPEARE.
WITHOUT PLANK, GNOME-HEAD'S
FALLING APART, BEGGING
TO GET BOSSED AROUND.
READY TO CHICKEN OUT?
[CHICKEN SQUAWKS]
>> NO. NOT AT ALL.
IT IS FUN TO
SPEAK IN SMALL WORDS ALL DAY.
NOT HARD ONE BIT.
[HORN HONKS] [HORSE WHINNIES]
>> DOUBLE D
HOW MUCH LONGER?
MUST ME EAT GRAVY.
AND BE AS ONE.
OH, THE SUFFERING!
>> [CHUCKLING]
[BELL RINGS]
>> KNOCK IT OFF, YA!
UM, YOU KNOW.
[HORSE WHINNIES] >>
DON'T, UM PUSH, ED-DY.
YOU ARE NOT OH FAIR.
>> HERE YOU GO, EDDY.
[ROOSTER CROWS] WASHED,
DARNED, AND STATIC-FREE.
I'M NOT LISTENING TO YOU.
>> TABLE KIND
OF TASTES LIKE GRAVY.
>> FORGET THE GRAVY, ED.
HERE.
GNAW ON THIS.
>> MASHED POTATOES.
NO GRAVY?
>> NICE CATCH, YA DORK!
DORK, DORK.
DORKY, DORKY, DORK!
[BONES CRACKING]
MAN, THAT FELT GOOD.
>> MUST FOLD SOCKS.
>> LET'S SEE HERE.
CONSCIENT-IOUS?
WHAT KIND OF BUNK WORD IS THAT?
OH, HERE'S ANOTHER ONE.
TEMPER-A-MENTAL.
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU,
BUT THAT'S JUST PLAIN STUPID.
>> STOP!
I WILL NOT TOLERATE YOUR
SINGLE-HANDED ANNIHILATION
YOUR OWN MONETARY GAIN, EDDY.
>> THINK, JONNY, THINK.
JUST MAKE UP YOUR MIND.
>> WHAT'S THAT, PLANK?
YOU WANT ME TO WHAT?
MOVE ALL YOUR STUFF TO MY HOUSE?
YOU WANT TO BOSS
ME AROUND INSTEAD
AND HANG OUT WITH SOMEONE
WITH A NORMAL-SIZED HEAD?
YOU'RE A RIOT, PAL O' MINE.
>> NOBODY TAKES ORDERS
FROM THIS CHUNK OF TERMITE FOOD.
EXCEPT ME!
NUTS TO YOUR STUPID
BET, HOME WRECKER.
>> THANK YOU,
JONNY THE WOOD BOY.
ROLF COULD NOT FIND THE
STRENGTH TO OPEN THE DOOR.
>> GRAVY?
>> I'VE GOT LOVE
IN MY TUMMY, SARAH.
>> ME, TOO, JIMMY.
>> MMM! MEATY.
[PIG SNORTING] YEP.
REAL MEATY MEAT.
>> THE GAMES HAVE ENDED.
ROLF CAN NO LONGER RESIS
THE SWEET FLESH DRAPED IN FA
LIKE PAPA'S THERAPEUTIC TRUSS.
>> IT IS YOU!
COME TO ED.
BELLY MISSES YOU.
>> ED, STOP!
YOU AND EDDY ARE THE
ONLY ONES LEFT IN THE BET.
>> [BURPS] >> I WIN!
HA HA HA!
AM I LOUD ENOUGH
FOR YOU, DOUBLE D?
HOW ABOUT NOW?!
NO?!
HOW ABOUT NOW?!
>> UH-OH.
BUTTERSCOTCH.
>> BUTTER-WHAT?
>> OH, WOULD
YOU LOOK AT THAT.
IT'S FUN WITH BUTTERSCOTCH
PUDDING TUESDAY TODAY.
IT'S NOT GRAVY AFTER ALL.
>> NOT GRAVY?
[CHICKEN SQUAWKS]
>> $1.25 EXACTLY.
CONGRATULATIONS.
I DO HOPE THIS EASES
THE DISCOMFORT A TAD.
WHO WOULD HAVE KNOWN YOU
WERE ALLERGIC TO BUTTERSCOTCH
PUDDING?
>> NOT ME, DOUBLE D.
>> WHAT'S BLOAT HEAD
GONNA DO WITH THAT CASH?
>> SEE?
>> A GRAVY CATALOGUE.
>> THERE'S MEXICAN HOT TAMALE
GRAVY AND SCOTTISH HAGGIS GRAVY.
SWISS CHEESE CHICKEN GRAVY.
YUM.
>> OH, COME ON!
YOU'RE GONNA SPEND THE
MONEY ON MORE GRAVY?
>> IRONY, EDDY.
LOOK THAT UP IN THE DICTIONARY.
>> OH, YEAH?
WELL, LOOKIE HERE.
I GOT ME SOME BUTTERSCOTCH
PUDDING WITH ED'S NAME ON IT.
HOW'S THAT FOR IRONING?
HA!
HA!
[CAT SCREECHES] >> JUS
A DASH OF HAUTE COUTURE.
FOR MY SCHOOL PORTRAIT, SARAH.
>> EW!
>> OH, GROSS!
>> WOW, PLANK, YOU AND
JIMMY ORDERED CLOTHES FROM.
THE SAME CATALOGUE.
HOW COOL IS THAT?
>> I'M SO GENERIC.
AAH!
[HORSE WHINNIES] >>
NAW, TOO GAME SHOW HOST.
OFF MODEL.
[BURPS] >> DID
YOU FORGET TO BRUSH.
YOUR TEETH, EDDY?
>> PERPETUATING
OUR VANITY, ARE WE?
>> WE'RE PRACTICING FOR
MY SCHOOL PHOTO, SOCK HEAD.
[SHEEP BLEATS]
>> I'M SO PRETTY.
OH, SO PRETTY.
>> DON'T YOU THINK YOUR
PARENTS WILL BE A TAD UPSET WITH.
A PHOTO OF YOU WITH
A SNAIL ON YOUR HEAD?
>> YOU'RE AN IDIOT, ED.
GUESS WHO'S GETTING TO MOVE
INTO HIS BIG BROTHER'S COOL
BEDROOM?
HERE'S A HINT: ME!
>> I WON!
>> REALLY?
>> REALLY.
I'M IN LIKE FLINT, SOCK HEAD.
MY MOM JUST WALKED UP
TO ME AND DANGLED HIS KEY
RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME.
SO I LOOKED AT HER LIKE,
"HUH?" AND THEN SHE'S ALL LIKE,
"YOU CAN MOVE INTO YOUR
BROTHER'S OLD BEDROOM
IF THIS YEAR'S SCHOOL
PHOTO IS NICE FOR ONCE, EDDY."
A PERFECT PICTURE AND NO
MORE BABY BROTHER EDDY.
>> WELL,
CONGRATULATIONS, EDDY.
IT SEEMS YOUR PARENTS HAVE
FINALLY RECOGNIZED HOW YOU'VE
GROWN SINCE YOUR
BROTHER'S DEPARTURE.
>> OOH!
WHOA!
>> MAKE SURE YOU
GET MY GOOD SIDE, BOZO!
>> I GUESS THA
RULES OUT HER FACE THEN.
>> OH! THIS STUPID
DRESS IS GIVING ME A RASH.
>> ROLF IS READY TO HAVE
HIS SOUL PILFERED FROM HIS.
VERY EYES, YES?
THANK YOU, YES.
OOH!
>> OHH!
>> WHAT A JOY IT WOULD
BE TO CAPTURE SUCH BEAUTY.
WITH MY HUMBLE CAMERA.
>> MAKE I
QUICK, CUE BALL.
>> WHAT DO YOU MEAN
YOU THINK YOU BLINKED?
>> TIME TO SCORE
MY BRO'S SWEET PAD.
[DRUM ROLL] >> DORK.
[BELL RINGS] >>
I CAN'T GIVE THIS.
TO MY MOM.
I LOOK LIKE I'M GETTING
MY TEMPERATURE TAKEN.
>> SURELY IT'S
NOT THAT BAD, EDDY.
ISN'T YOUR MOTHER FAR-SIGHTED?
>> AW, YOU
LOOK LIKE AN ONION.
MOMS LOVE ONIONS.
>> OH, I'll
GIVE YOU AN ONION.
I WAS SO CLOSE.
I COULD ALMOST SMELL MY
BROTHER'S STUFFED CAMEL.
[FOOTSTEPS] GROAN.
[CHICKEN SQUAWKS] >>
THE TEACHER'S WATCHING US,
EDDY.
[PLAYING OFF-KEY]
>> YOU KNOW, EDDY.
I AM IN THE PHOTOGRAPHY CLUB.
I'll JUST RETAKE YOUR
PHOTO DURING LUNCH.
[METRONOME TICKING]
>> I LIKE THAT.
IT'LL BE LIKE THIS BUM
PHOTO NEVER EXISTED.
HEY, CHARLIE THE
BIRDBRAIN PARKER, EAT THIS.
>> THANKS, EDDY.
[HORSE WHINNIES] >> PSST!
GET A LOAD OF PRUNE FACE.
>> ROLF HAS SEEN PRUNIER.
[BELL RINGS] >> OH, LOOK.
PERHAPS A NOTICE FROM OUR
ESTEEMED SCHOOL FACULTY.
OHH!
>> AIN'T YOU SUPPOSED
TO BE TAKING MY PHOTO?
MY PHOTO!
HUH?
THEY'RE ALL OVER
THE [BELL RINGS] AAH!
>> HA HA HA HA!
>> IT'S A MIRACLE, YES.
FINALLY SOME ED
BOYS MERCHANDISE.
>> IF THAT AIN'T A FASHION
STATEMENT, I DON'T KNOW WHAT IS.
>> SAY SOMETHING
FUNNY ABOUT MY BINDER, KEV.
HEE HEE HEE!
>> UM
>> I KNEW IT.
[HORSE WHINNIES]
>> EDDY, WAIT.
PERHAPS WE SHOULD >>
WE GOT TO DITCH THESE PRONTO.
>> WARN THOSE
FINE LITTLE MEN.
NO, WAIT.
IT'S HORACE.
>> IN HERE, EDD.
>> I THINK I
HAVE A PAPER CUT.
>> BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP.
>> BUT THAT PHOTO
COPIER'S SCHOOL PROPERTY.
STUDENTS USE THAT.
>> IF THAT PHOTO EVER GETS
OUT FOR MY MOM TO SEE, I CAN.
KISS MY BROTHER'S ROOM GOOD-BYE.
I BETCHA THERE'S MORE.
IT'S A NIGHTMARE, I TELL YA.
>> [LAUGHING]
>> MMWA!
STOP KISSING YOURSELF. MMWA!
STOP KISSING YOURSELF.
MMWA!
STOP KISSING YOURSELF.
MMWA!
STOP KISSING YOURSELF.
>> [LAUGHING]
>> HELP ME!
[BIRD CAWS] >> I
THINK WE MAY BE ABLE.
TO SAVE EDDY'S
PROVERBIAL BACON YET.
AHEM.
GOOD AFTERNOON, STUDENTS
OF PEACH CREEK JUNIOR HIGH.
THIS IS YOUR PRINCIPAL SPEAKING
WITH A VERY IMPORTANT, UM,
ANNOUNCEMENT.
VERY GOOD.
AHEM.
ALL COPIES OF STUDENT EDDY'S
SCHOOL PHOTOGRAPH ARE TO BE
RETURNED TO HIM IMMEDIATELY.
FAILURE TO COMPLY WILL
WARRANT DETENTION FOR EVERYONE
FOR THE REST OF THE SEMESTER.
THANK YOU.
>> BUMMER.
>> YOU HEARD THE MAN.
>> AHH.
>> DID I JUST DO THAT?
I DID, DIDN'T I?
I JUST IMPERSONATED
THE PRINCIPAL.
MADE FALSE
DECLARATIONS IN HIS NAME.
OH, WHAT HAVE I DONE?
>> WHOO HOO!
GET THIS, GUYS.
THE PRINCIPAL JUST MADE
EVERYBODY GIVE BACK
ALL THE COPIES OF MY BUM PHOTO.
ME!
WHAT A SAP!
PUT YOUR HELME
NEWTON ON, SOCK HEAD.
WE GOT A PICTURE TO TAKE.
MY BROTHER'S ROOM IS IN THE BAG.
>> NOT IN THE HOUSE, EDDY?
>> DRATS!
DUE TO YESTERDAY'S PHOTOGRAPHY
ASSIGNMENT, I'M AFRAID I ONLY
HAVE ONE LAS
EXPOSURE ON THIS FILM.
>> WHATEVER.
ONE-SHOT EDDY'S MY MIDDLE NAME.
>> MAKE-UP!
>> HOW VERY HELPFUL, ED.
>> OW.
>> READY ON 3.
1 2 >> 3.
OOPS! FORGOT ONE.
HA HA HA!
>> HE DID I
AGAIN, DOUBLE D!
[COPIER HUMMING]
>> LOOK, DOUBLE D.
A PICTURE FOR EDDY. SEE?
HE'S GETTING THE KEY
TO HIS BROTHER'S ROOM,
AND IT'S MADE OF POTATO SALAD.
>> AW, ED.
WHAT A LOVELY GESTURE.
ALTHOUGH, MAYBE YOU SHOULD
GIVE IT TO HIM WHEN HE'S NO
SO UPSET.
>> TALK ABOU
ADDING INSECTS TO INJURY.
TWO HOURS OF STINKING CLEAN-UP.
PLUS A WEEK'S WORTH OF DETENTION
FOR IMPERSONATING THE PRINCIPAL.
I DON'T EVEN
REMEMBER DOING THAT.
>> REALLY?
A WHOLE WEEK?
GRACIOUS.
UM ED HAS SOMETHING
FOR YOU, EDDY.
>> DO I EVER.
IT'S A KEY.
>> HEY!
I AIN'T PULLING A STUPID
FACE IN THIS PICTURE.
THIS'LL WORK FOR
MY SCHOOL PHOTO.
BIG BRO'S ROOM, HERE I COME!
>> I'M FLABBERGASTED, ED.
HE SERIOUSLY THINKS HE
CAN APPEASE HIS MOTHER WITH
A CRAYON DRAWING IN
LIEU OF A SCHOOL PHOTO.
I MEAN, THE LINES
ARE ALL WIGGLY.
>> CAN I DRAW YOUR
SCHOOL PHOTO, DOUBLE D?
>> THANK
YOU, ED, BUT I'M
>> MAKE-UP!
>> NO, WAIT.
SELF-PORTRAIT.