Robot Chicken s05e15 Episode Script
The Godfather of the Bride II
It's alive! In a survival situation, you can find water inside of a cactus.
Oh, I just can't figure this thing out What's a VDV anyway? How about now, grandma? - Oh, I see.
This is the port for the HDMI jack, not the output for the coaxial cable interface.
Right it is.
From the makers of Guitar Hero comes a new game where the fun just Didgeree-don't stop! Get ready for Didgeree-doo Hero.
Rock amazing concerts on the sun swept planes of Australia Blow that didge! You're the best dude! Master the art of Didgeridoo to classics like, "Oh Ho the Banyan Tree," "That's Not A Knife," and Metallica's "Enter Sandman.
" Order now and get a free tube of Aborigine Face paint made from Iron Ore and Duck Droppings.
Go Buy Didgeridoo Hero! Anyone can Didgeridoo it! Send in the next candidate for building the bomb.
Great Scott! My name is Doctor Emmett Brown.
My resume is in here somewhere Attended MIT.
Inventor.
Professor.
It says here you're inventing a time machine? Not to worry, it doesn't run on plutonium.
Definitely don't need plutonium for the time machine.
Your crazy hair makes you look smart.
Like Einstein.
Ahhh hahahaha.
But Einstein was a Jew! That's why I named the dog Einstein.
Oh, that's good.
I've actually been sending Einstein on some trial runs in the time machine that needs plutonium doesn't need plutonium.
I don't have a time machine.
Now lemme ask you a question about the plutonium.
Can it fit in the engine valve of a 1982 DeLorean? I like this guy.
We have chosen you to build the bomb.
Great, lemme just get that plutonium and I'll be back in five minutes with your bomb.
And here you go, here's your bomb.
Nice working with you guys.
See you later.
Hey, this looks exactly like the pinball machine from the staff lounge.
Damn it! Let it be known that I died for your Whoa.
Whoaaa You're not like other boys, Edward.
That's because I'm actually And all that time, I've been waiting for you, Bella.
Oh! Uh, do you know the speed limit's like 65? Do you know that every time you get behind the wheel of a car you're driving a lethal weapon? I love you.
Bella says you've got crazy powers.
That true? Sure is.
Try this on for size.
Whoa! Two bits! You should be an accountant.
You've got a real head for money.
And the bishop was charged with statutory rape, due to the girl's young age.
Ugh.
Isn't that so disgusting? Meh.
I bet he eats dinner at 4:00.
Cut it out, Molly! You're ruining it! Hello, I'm Lady Gaga.
Are you sick of boring, run-of-the-mill babysitters? Then maybe it's time for Goo Goo Gaga, the premiere avant-garde baby-sitting service from Gaga.
The evening's entertainment begins with song, dance, and tribal masks.
When you return home, you'll find your baby sleeping soundly dangling from the ceiling covered in menstrual blood.
I'm wearing a diaper made of dirty angel farts.
Oooh la la.
Goo Goo Gaga.
There are sides of me that you'll never understand.
More of your favorite fried Pterodactyl, Fred? Yabba dabba Yes or no.
Hello, I am the Great Gazoo! Aaaaaaaaaah! It's a god! It's a green god!!! H-Here, take her! Take my wife! P-Please, there are children present.
He wants our children! Forgive me, Betty! Whoa, whoa, I'm no Roman Polanski.
Then, let this animal sacrifice appease your holy rage! I I just wanted to go on adventures Our God is weak! Kill it! Kill it!!!!! What an unfitting end for such an important peripheral character! Yabba dabba fuck you! You ever notice how red bone marrow performs hematopoiesis like this.
Oh, I'm eating a little bit of blood.
I'll have a little of that.
But brown bone marrow performs hematopoiesis like this! Chuck! It's your cousin Marvin Berry! You know that new sound you've been looking for? Well listen to this! That's Johnny B Good I just laid it down last week! Motherfucker stole my song! Keep him there! I'm 15 minutes away! Chuck! You gonna pee on me or what? And if one of your kids accidentally sets fire to the living room rug Who's the motherfucker been stealin' my songs?! Chuck Berry?! How the fuck do you know my name, man?! You're only one of the biggest rock stars in history Oh, really Oh, hey there.
How you doin', young lady? All right! Oy, my tuchas! Ethel! Ethel! Oh Shlomo, Shlomol You won't believe this tsurras! We've got moths! Oy vey? Are you a dog? How many times has this happened to you? You're out on the street.
Then a dog you know walks by.
But before you can finish your conversation, your owner drags you away.
Not anymore.
Veringular announces the new DogPhone.
And that's not all.
DogPhone now comes with free Voicemail.
You have 37 messages.
Veringular.
Bringing dogs together.
Not so fucking smart now, are we? I am going baaaaack to the sea.
Back to the sea! Great Scott! I'm all out of plutonium.
How am I ever going to generate enough Gigawatts to get home again? Great Scott! Can you turn that up? Jigga what? Jigga who ls that Huey Lewis? No, man.
Chuck Berry? ZZ Top maybe? That's Jay-Z, man.
That's famous enough for me.
And apparently he's got the Gigawatts I need! It's the Roc! With the Doc! Jigga on that future flow Got you unravelin' You stuck in the present Jigga time-travelin' J on that next ish You move slow-mo Came out the Lexus Hopped in the De-lo Movin' so fast You be askin' "Why, kid?" Go back in the past Fuck your moms like McFly did Rappers betta head home Else'll be a massacre All you got's a microphone We got flux capacitor! You can let a gun blow But you'll never test Shawn We already know, got Bulletproof vests on You can never catch us You be movin' so slow We escaped the Libyans! Going double ocho Done that, been there All over the time-line Two MC's squared equals E, dog, Einstein That dog okay? He's more of a guinea pig than a dog.
Yo, B! Hit 'em with that futuristic hook! Our future's bright So hot! Your future's not Great Scott! We got those jumpin', jumpin', jumpin' Jiggawatts Jiggawatt? We're hotter than One point twenty one That's alot! Ha ha! We've got those jumpin', jumpin', jumpin' Jiggawatts Jiggawatt? Jiggawho? Invested my money right There's nothin' I can't afford You can try to skate through life Hova got a hoverboard So crisp, take a whiff Rock my Calvin's on tour You be smellin' like Biff I hate manure!! Fulfill my density Now we in the trigger spot Jay, time to hit me! I'll give you all the Jiggawatts! Yeah, Jigga, I know who's gonna win the NBA Championship in 2035.
You may not even be alive.
Ha ha ha ha.
I know your grandkids' grandkids.
I'm so official!
Oh, I just can't figure this thing out What's a VDV anyway? How about now, grandma? - Oh, I see.
This is the port for the HDMI jack, not the output for the coaxial cable interface.
Right it is.
From the makers of Guitar Hero comes a new game where the fun just Didgeree-don't stop! Get ready for Didgeree-doo Hero.
Rock amazing concerts on the sun swept planes of Australia Blow that didge! You're the best dude! Master the art of Didgeridoo to classics like, "Oh Ho the Banyan Tree," "That's Not A Knife," and Metallica's "Enter Sandman.
" Order now and get a free tube of Aborigine Face paint made from Iron Ore and Duck Droppings.
Go Buy Didgeridoo Hero! Anyone can Didgeridoo it! Send in the next candidate for building the bomb.
Great Scott! My name is Doctor Emmett Brown.
My resume is in here somewhere Attended MIT.
Inventor.
Professor.
It says here you're inventing a time machine? Not to worry, it doesn't run on plutonium.
Definitely don't need plutonium for the time machine.
Your crazy hair makes you look smart.
Like Einstein.
Ahhh hahahaha.
But Einstein was a Jew! That's why I named the dog Einstein.
Oh, that's good.
I've actually been sending Einstein on some trial runs in the time machine that needs plutonium doesn't need plutonium.
I don't have a time machine.
Now lemme ask you a question about the plutonium.
Can it fit in the engine valve of a 1982 DeLorean? I like this guy.
We have chosen you to build the bomb.
Great, lemme just get that plutonium and I'll be back in five minutes with your bomb.
And here you go, here's your bomb.
Nice working with you guys.
See you later.
Hey, this looks exactly like the pinball machine from the staff lounge.
Damn it! Let it be known that I died for your Whoa.
Whoaaa You're not like other boys, Edward.
That's because I'm actually And all that time, I've been waiting for you, Bella.
Oh! Uh, do you know the speed limit's like 65? Do you know that every time you get behind the wheel of a car you're driving a lethal weapon? I love you.
Bella says you've got crazy powers.
That true? Sure is.
Try this on for size.
Whoa! Two bits! You should be an accountant.
You've got a real head for money.
And the bishop was charged with statutory rape, due to the girl's young age.
Ugh.
Isn't that so disgusting? Meh.
I bet he eats dinner at 4:00.
Cut it out, Molly! You're ruining it! Hello, I'm Lady Gaga.
Are you sick of boring, run-of-the-mill babysitters? Then maybe it's time for Goo Goo Gaga, the premiere avant-garde baby-sitting service from Gaga.
The evening's entertainment begins with song, dance, and tribal masks.
When you return home, you'll find your baby sleeping soundly dangling from the ceiling covered in menstrual blood.
I'm wearing a diaper made of dirty angel farts.
Oooh la la.
Goo Goo Gaga.
There are sides of me that you'll never understand.
More of your favorite fried Pterodactyl, Fred? Yabba dabba Yes or no.
Hello, I am the Great Gazoo! Aaaaaaaaaah! It's a god! It's a green god!!! H-Here, take her! Take my wife! P-Please, there are children present.
He wants our children! Forgive me, Betty! Whoa, whoa, I'm no Roman Polanski.
Then, let this animal sacrifice appease your holy rage! I I just wanted to go on adventures Our God is weak! Kill it! Kill it!!!!! What an unfitting end for such an important peripheral character! Yabba dabba fuck you! You ever notice how red bone marrow performs hematopoiesis like this.
Oh, I'm eating a little bit of blood.
I'll have a little of that.
But brown bone marrow performs hematopoiesis like this! Chuck! It's your cousin Marvin Berry! You know that new sound you've been looking for? Well listen to this! That's Johnny B Good I just laid it down last week! Motherfucker stole my song! Keep him there! I'm 15 minutes away! Chuck! You gonna pee on me or what? And if one of your kids accidentally sets fire to the living room rug Who's the motherfucker been stealin' my songs?! Chuck Berry?! How the fuck do you know my name, man?! You're only one of the biggest rock stars in history Oh, really Oh, hey there.
How you doin', young lady? All right! Oy, my tuchas! Ethel! Ethel! Oh Shlomo, Shlomol You won't believe this tsurras! We've got moths! Oy vey? Are you a dog? How many times has this happened to you? You're out on the street.
Then a dog you know walks by.
But before you can finish your conversation, your owner drags you away.
Not anymore.
Veringular announces the new DogPhone.
And that's not all.
DogPhone now comes with free Voicemail.
You have 37 messages.
Veringular.
Bringing dogs together.
Not so fucking smart now, are we? I am going baaaaack to the sea.
Back to the sea! Great Scott! I'm all out of plutonium.
How am I ever going to generate enough Gigawatts to get home again? Great Scott! Can you turn that up? Jigga what? Jigga who ls that Huey Lewis? No, man.
Chuck Berry? ZZ Top maybe? That's Jay-Z, man.
That's famous enough for me.
And apparently he's got the Gigawatts I need! It's the Roc! With the Doc! Jigga on that future flow Got you unravelin' You stuck in the present Jigga time-travelin' J on that next ish You move slow-mo Came out the Lexus Hopped in the De-lo Movin' so fast You be askin' "Why, kid?" Go back in the past Fuck your moms like McFly did Rappers betta head home Else'll be a massacre All you got's a microphone We got flux capacitor! You can let a gun blow But you'll never test Shawn We already know, got Bulletproof vests on You can never catch us You be movin' so slow We escaped the Libyans! Going double ocho Done that, been there All over the time-line Two MC's squared equals E, dog, Einstein That dog okay? He's more of a guinea pig than a dog.
Yo, B! Hit 'em with that futuristic hook! Our future's bright So hot! Your future's not Great Scott! We got those jumpin', jumpin', jumpin' Jiggawatts Jiggawatt? We're hotter than One point twenty one That's alot! Ha ha! We've got those jumpin', jumpin', jumpin' Jiggawatts Jiggawatt? Jiggawho? Invested my money right There's nothin' I can't afford You can try to skate through life Hova got a hoverboard So crisp, take a whiff Rock my Calvin's on tour You be smellin' like Biff I hate manure!! Fulfill my density Now we in the trigger spot Jay, time to hit me! I'll give you all the Jiggawatts! Yeah, Jigga, I know who's gonna win the NBA Championship in 2035.
You may not even be alive.
Ha ha ha ha.
I know your grandkids' grandkids.
I'm so official!