The Nanny s05e15 Episode Script

Here we are! Home sweet home.
Thank you so much for coming all the way to Koorestan just to say you love me, Max.
( Giggles ) ( laughter ) Now, you haven't said it in New York yet, so say it again.
Fran, aren't you getting kinda tired of hearing it, or is that just me? ( laughter ) There you go, sweetheart.
Fran Yes? I love you.
( Giggles ) Hi, everyone, we're home.
And guess what, your father has something he wants to share with you all.
I've told Miss Fine I love her.
What else is new? ( laughter ) Oh, oh, yes.
I didn't take it back.
Oh, congratulations! That's wonderful news.
( laughter ) Shall I get you a fork? What for? To stick in yourself.
You're done.
( laughter ) She was working in a bridal shop in Flushing, Queens 'Til her boyfriend kicked her out in one of those crushing scenes What was she to do, where was she to go, she was out on her fanny So over the bridge from Flushing to the Sheffield's door She was there to sell make up but the father saw more She had style, she had flair, she was there, that's how she became the Nanny Who would have guessed that the girl we described Was just exactly what the doctor prescribed? Now, the father finds her beguiling Watch out, C.
C.
And the kids are actually smiling such joie de vivre She's the lady in red when everybody else is wearing tan The flashy girl from Flushing, the Nanny named Fran ( laughter ) Niles, I see something sickening.
( laughter ) Well, that was fun, now what? ( laughter ) Alright, knock it off.
( Clears throat ) Oh, I'm sorry, C.
C.
Miss Fine, would you please try to conduct yourself, a little more professionally? No, you conduct yourself first.
No, I asked you first! No, I asked you first! Max: No, no, no.
Stop it, stop it.
No! Stop it! C.
C.
, C.
C.
I do apologize.
What was it that you wanted to say? You mean besides "yuck?" ( laughter ) Maxwell, we have business to attend to other than playing kissy face with the help.
Oh, come on, Miss Babcock, I'm not really that much help.
( laughter ) You know, I'm really going to miss you.
I've grown accustomed to your waist.
( laughter ) Do you know what is so sad? I mean, besides the fact that you sleep in Brighton's old bed? ( laughter ) Maxwell is going to worm his way out of this like always.
Nanny Fine is headed for such a fall.
Oh, God.
I don't wanna be around to see that.
Actually, I do.
( laughter ) Here's my beeper number.
( Giggling ) Oh, Fran, this thing with you and dad is so romantic.
I just hope the same thing happens to me someday.
Well, except for the fact that I become a cleaning lady and wait around for six years for the man I love to finally make a move.
( laughter ) ( sighs ) I know, it's like a fairy tale.
( laughter ) Oh, Nanny Fine, cute coat.
How many Muppets had to die for that? ( laughter ) You know, I can understand you being bitter, but, honey, when you stay too long at the fair a man loses respect.
Another three years and I was out that door myself.
( laughter ) You know, Nanny Fran, I think it is so precious how you think Maxwell saying he loves you means something.
I think it's pretty obvious that he's not taking it back this time.
Oh, no, he's not going to take it back.
He is going to drag this thing on and on and on until you get disgusted and die.
( laughter ) But like a cockroach I was here long before you and I'll be here long after you're gone.
( laughter ) Oh, Max, you know how happy you made me that you told me you loved me, but don't you think it's time we went on to the next level? ( laughter ) You know, I'm not going to be 69 forever.
Now, Miss Miss Fine, uh, uh, Franny, but we can't just jump into this.
I'm awfully worried about the children.
First of all, we can't jump.
Period.
( laughter ) Second of all.
Whose children are you worried about? Yours? Theirs? Or theirs? ( laughter ) Coming through.
Come, coming through.
Round you go, round you go, buddy.
- Come on, buddy, - Come on back here.
It just got away from you.
That's all.
Just got a little away from him.
( laughter ) ( laughter ) Hello.
( Coughs ) C.
C.
, I could've saved you the trip.
I'm not going to any party for "Cats.
" Oh, Maxwell.
Come on, how many shows hit a billion performances? Why don't you take your husband? Oh, I don't want to go with her.
( laughter ) One drunken stupor in 2006 and I'm still paying for it.
( laughter ) You see? Even they're married.
You know, I'm not going to wait around forever.
I'm telling you, Mister.
I give it another three years, and then I am out of here.
( laughter ) Niles: Miss Fine, Miss Fine.
Oh, oh.
Oh, thank God.
What's wrong? Niles, do you think that it's possible that Mr.
Sheffield told me that he loves me just to string me along forever? Oh, no.
Although he isn't very good with commitment.
I'm still on a week to week.
( laughter ) Oh, no, this is ridiculous.
Miss Babcock is out of her mind.
I'm not listening to her.
But you know what, if she asks you out for drinks in the year 2006, don't go.
( laughter ) Oh, Niles, Niles come here, I want to tell you something.
Mm-hmm? Niles, can you keep a secret? Well, I'm good until I meet another person.
( laughter ) Look I I'm serious, this concerns Miss Fine.
Oh, no, you're not going to disappoint her again.
Not unless you think she'll be disappointed by this.
Oh, sir.
Oh, sir, it's beautiful.
This is the happiest day of my life.
( laughter ) You know, it's funny how you pictured it but you're never really prepared for it.
Do you, do you think she'll like it? Oh, my God, she'll be speechless.
Maybe I should give it to her now then.
( laughing ) No, seriously, Niles, I want your word that you won't say anything.
Oh, on my honor, sir, I won't say a word.
I swear.
Oh, and sir, congratulations.
Thank you, Niles.
Yes! Niles, what happened? - Did Miss Babcock die? - No, no.
Better.
Oh? Well, not better, but good.
What? What? Oh, I can't say a word.
Mm.
Two words! Okay, good, good.
First word, yes, what? I, I.
Okay good.
Second word.
Wow.
I cried.
I got a cold in my eye.
I boogered, I goo.
I goo! I goo! Okay, sounds like "I goo.
" I goo.
I joo.
I'm a Jew! I'm a Jew! No, no, no.
I joo, I boo, I goo, I do.
I do? - He does? - He do! Yahoo! ( Shouting ) ( dialing ) ( phone rings ) Yes? I'm getting married! Sorry, Miss, you got the wrong number.
Ma, it's me.
Mr.
Sheffield's gonna propose.
Oh, my God, I'm so happy.
Oh, hold on, I'm getting beeped.
Oh, ma, don't disconnect.
Hello? Mrs.
Fine, I think you ordered too much food.
You want four orders of ribs? You know, I can take my business across the street to Mr.
Lee.
He's not judgmental.
I'm sorry, I can't talk now, my daughter is getting proposed to.
Get out of town! Hold please, I have another call.
Hello? Mr.
Chung, what's taking so long? I ordered an hour ago.
Hang on lady, I'm talking to Sylvia Fine.
Her daughter is about to get proposed to.
What? Sylvia.
Hi, ma.
Guess what? Mr.
Sheffield is gonna pop the question.
Oh, I hope you told him no, it'll kill Sammy.
Hang on a second, I'm getting beeped.
Oy, this thing is like Grand Central Station.
Hello? It's Rabbi Margulies, Mazel Tov on your daughter! By the way, I'm not accusing, but we found Raisinettes in the organ bay.
Sheffield residence.
Niles, is it true? (all together) Let's just hope he doesn't take it back.
Ma? You disconnected me.
What I was going to tell you was: it's a big secret.
I'm not even supposed to know yet.
Mamala, look, please, who am I gonna tell? ( laughter ) He's coming.
( laughter ) Oh, Miss Fine, there's something I wanted to ask you.
Yes? ( Music ) ( laughter ) I wanted to ask you if you'd like to have dinner tonight.
( laughter ) Alright, how about Italian? Oh, no, no, this is a rather special occasion.
Oh? 'Cause I've booked the Rainbow Room, so why don't you ask your family to join us? I think they should all be there.
Now I'm going to be tied up at the theater until about 7:30 so I'll see you here about 8:00.
( Doorbell rings ) Oh, I'll get that, unless it's a surprise you don't want Oh, he's gone.
( laughter ) Hi! I'm so happy for you! Ma told you? No! I heard it from Mr.
Chung at the Rickshaw Hunan Palace.
Oh, by the way, he sent this.
Congratulations! ( laughter ) Shh! I'm technically not even supposed to know myself yet.
Mr.
Sheffield wants to pop the question in front of everyone at the Rainbow Room.
You're invited tonight.
Fran, after all this time, I can't believe he's finally going to pop the question.
I know.
To tell you the truth, I was worried he'd never do it.
I know.
Quite frankly, it was getting pretty pathetic.
I know, Val! But would you just act surprised.
( Gasps ) Not now, sheesh! ( laughter ) Show me the love, baby! You're switched on, you're smashing.
Oh, behave! Oh, Brighton, I want you to get every angle to capture this.
Oh, higher, honey, I want you to capture happy, not hippie.
Mom.
Fran.
Oh, can you believe this? ( Crying ) He was so young! ( laughter ) No one died, ma.
Fran is gonna get proposed to.
Oh, thank God! Finally these three kids'll have a father! Oh, Niles, I can't believe this night is finally here.
I only wish Miss Babcock were around to share in the joy.
Hello, hello.
Thank you.
So, Niles, what is the emergency? Oh, you have all been the victim of a hostile makeover.
( laughter ) Now, listen, everyone, when Mr.
Sheffield springs it on me, I want you all to act like you never heard it before.
Just be really surprised, be very convincing.
You what? ( Whispering ) ( gasps ) I.
E.
( Playing wedding march ) Fran, can't we take our coats off? It's been half an hour.
How much longer do we have to wait? No one has waited as long as I have.
( laughter ) Leave the coat on.
( laughter ) Nanny Fine, you know, maybe you should take up knitting.
Maxwell's gonna need warm socks for those cold feet.
( laughter ) You know, I know what you're getting at, but he's not going to be backing out this time.
He'll be here.
That man loves me, I feel it in my heart of hearts.
Swear you saw that ring.
( Phone rings ) Ah! Hello? Relax, it's him.
Fran, I know I'm running late, but I'm gonna need a little more time here There's just one more thing I have to do.
Uh, okay, honey, don't worry, we'll be here, waiting.
( laughter ) Oh, Nanny Fine don't be depressed, at least Maxwell gave you a ring.
A rrrringggg.
( laughter ) ( sighs ) Well, Sarah, my love.
You know you'll always be in my heart.
You're my first love, and you're the mother of our children, and nothing can ever change that.
But, I've met someone very special, and I love her a great deal.
( Chuckles ) And the children are crazy about her.
I think you'll like her.
You know what, in many ways she reminds me of (clear throat) nobody you've ever met.
( laughter ) I think you'll be very happy for us.
Hey, how's it going Mr.
Sheffield? Oh, Jake, congratulate me.
I'm about to ask my nanny to marry me.
The one with the voice? Uh, what voice? Oh, you're in love.
( laughter ) Good night, Jake.
Excuse me, you got the time? Oh yes, 8:50.
You don't really want to know the time, do you? ( laughter ) They did such a good job on him.
He looks like he's just sleeping peacefully.
Yetta, Yetta, he's not dead.
It's always hardest for the young ones to accept.
( laughter ) Sammy and I sent that.
Look, Yetta, it's the nicest one.
( laughter ) He'll be here, ma.
He wouldn't do this to me.
Sweetheart, you know, you can always come home.
We'll redo your room exactly like it was.
( laughter ) I even saved your old Flashdance comforter set.
( laughter ) You mean the one with the two pillow shams that say "what a feeling?" ( laughter ) Nanny Fine, listen.
I packed a few of your things to make the transition easier.
Next, jackets, sweaters and slutty skirts.
( Giggling ) ( laughter ) No, ma, no.
I know him, he loves me, and he would've been here by now.
Something must've happened to him, something must be wrong.
I've gotta go find him.
Mr.
Sheffield, Mr.
Sheffield, ( Max groaning ) Oh, my God! Oh, Mr.
Sheffield.
- Oh, Miss Fine, - Are you hurt? What happened? Oh, I got mugged.
I was on my way home to you.
I'm sorry I'm so late.
Oh.
That's okay as long as you're alright, who cares? I should've fought back.
No, no, no.
They say you never fight back.
You just give the what they want.
You don't argue, you don't get aggressive.
- They got the ring.
- I'll kill them.
I mean, I mean what ring? Oh, Fran, I wanted tonight to be the most romantic night of your life.
I wanted wait a minute.
( Groaning ) Wait, wait.
Fran, Yes? Will you marry me? Oh, Max.
You know, it's all so sudden.
( laughter ) Well, will you? What do you think? ( Applause ) I'm getting married! ( Applause )