Robot Chicken s05e19 Episode Script

Hello? Oh, my It smells like this room has not been cleaned for five whole seasons of a television show.
Oh! Hello chicken! Ooh, your chair so dirty.
If I clean you no run away, okay? You promise? I like you, Chicken.
Oh man! I just realized they'll probably show the Sex and the City 3 trailer! Why are you so excited? I tried to drag you to the last one and you almost broke up with me.
The last one flopped pretty bad, so the studio's making the third one more guy-friendly.
Well, the lack of testes was making me testy but this boring event just took a sperm for the better.
Hey everyone, this chick is giving me some ah you know what, it's too easy.
Joke withdrawn, everyone.
Joke withdrawn.
"The detective said Samantha's collar was rigged to blow as soon as she made a sex pun.
So it couldn't have been on her for more than 60 seconds.
" Carrie, come to Miranda's, quick! The collar was rigged to blow as soon as she tasted tuna.
Ironically, she was making an actual tuna fish sandwich.
Mr.
Big, someone is killing my friends! You've got to help us! Carrie, I have two secrets.
First, my real name isn't Alexander Big.
My second secret is THIS.
Out of the way gaybies! Hyah! Hyah! Big? I feel so strange.
Your brain is getting used to your new body, Miss Bradshaw.
Uhh, what shall I do with her old body? Donate it to science.
Shut up! The Katherine Heigl movie is starting.
Sex and The City 3! Sex and The City 3! Shhh!! Hey hey hey! I avoid starvation for another day! Sorry Yogi, but if you steal one more basket, it's my job.
You'll never catch me, I live the life of the free! Not this time, Yogi.
Ho Chi Hacharu! Quite the surprise, but try this one on for size! Hey, hey, hey! Go, Go! Power Forest Rangers Go, go! Power Forest Rangers Go, Go! Power Forest Rangers Go, Go! Power Forest Rangers Go, Go! Power Forest Rangers What the fuck is happening!! And that is how you bring Yogi Bear to Japan! You're welcome! They called me mad, but I did it! Egypt shall forevermore be known as the land of giant boobies! Haha.
They're like giant boobies! Don't be an idiot! I just don't think we're ready for this.
Not-not right now.
Okay.
I understand.
It's okay.
Are you on your way to a fancy party?! That was my line from our first appearance on this show.
Eyegorp! I deserve it! Oh, man.
You seem so RUTHLESS time to make you TOOTHLESS! Mmm, your beak looks ribbed for MY pleasure! Oh! Ow! That's not half bad actually.
I'm so happy 'cause you are gonna die GONNA DIE! No no no! No, stop! A drumroll? It's so suspenseful! AAAAAAAAAAA!! What an ironic death! I'm a CHAMPION! Looks like SOMEONE'S been watching Tony Jaa's The Protector.
L-Looks like someone just peed in his Gatchaman boxer shorts! Whew.
Suck my sleigh balls! Argh! My only weakness! Duh da da da dah dah daaaah! Bitch.
Pudding! B-b-b-blam! How do you like this taste of Bitch Pudding?! Your momma sure liked it when she ate it out of my butthole! B-Blam! Bitch Pudding! Blam blam blam blam blam! Whoooo! Blam! Blaaaaamm Ow! You saved me! - Have at thee! My life has value after all! Ding dang! This is gonna be one dilly of a slobberknocker! These ratings will be glorious.
Let me just get that for you.
I wish I was a bionic chicken.
That would be so cool.