The Neighborhood (2018) s05e21 Episode Script

1
Oh, hey, Tina. Sorry, I'm in a rush.
It's coffee with the principal day,
and I have to stop at Starbucks
- because school coffee is straight trash.
- Ugh.
Okay. Look, r-real quick. Feel this.
Whoa, that's a lot of cash.
Why do you have all that?
If it's illegal, don't tell me, Tina.
I'm a snitch.
It's advanced ticket sales
for our school musical.
Word must have gotten around
that the director's a genius.
Oh, okay, so you're a genius now?
Follow the money, mama.
Follow the money.
Oh, have a good day, baby.
- Oh.
- Mwah.
- Hoping to beat traffic.
- Okay.
Oh, hey, Calvin. I know
what you're wondering,
and the, uh, the answer is no.
What was I wondering?
Oh, well, you were wondering
if my dad has reached out to me
since I accepted his
friend request one week ago.
He has not.
Oh, well, sorry to hear that.
Hey, it's his loss.
Yeah. (SIGHS) You know
hadn't thought about him for years,
but then Grover found his picture online
and memories just came flooding back.
Yeah. Yeah, I can see
that. Okay, got to go.
You know, every time I pass a Pizza Hut,
I remember he used to
take me there every Friday
after Little League.
Yeah, I would go to the salad bar
and fill my pockets with croutons.
I literally would have ants in my pants.
Hey, you got to remember the good times.
Okay, now, talk to you later.
And then one Friday, the
Hut introduced stuffed crust.
I'm so jazzed to try it with my dad.
That was the Friday that he disappeared.
Just felt lost ever since.
All right.
Tell me more.
Well, there was a time
I had testicular torsion.
I had no one to talk to about that.
And you still don't.
Okay, how about we, uh,
skip to the part of your life
where you are a father and a husband?
You know, like, if
you saw your dad today,
what would you say to him?
(SIGHS) I don't know. I guess I
Guess I would say, uh,
"Hey, Lamar.
"It's great to see you again.
Thanks for abandoning
me." And then face punch!
Okay. All right. You know what, Dave?
Maybe it's a good thing
he hasn't responded to you.
Yeah, well, maybe it's a good
thing that I haven't responded to him.
Face punch again.
God, just thinking about
him makes me angry A.H.
You know what? I'm just
gonna go ahead and say it.
Angry as heck!
- (DOOR CLOSES)
- Oh, damn.
Welcome to the block,
welcome to the neighborhood ♪
Welcome to the hood. ♪
Dad? You haven't left yet?
I tried, but I got Dave'd.
Yeah, well, I've been there,
but we need to head
over to the Fuse Box.
Some of the people we hired don't
actually do anything until I get there.
Look, son, you're gonna have
to light a fire under their asses.
That's your job now.
Management is more than
having a parking spot.
You have a parking spot?
I'm paying $20 to park at the bank.
Hey.
Excuse me.
I'm looking for 1172 Evergreen Drive.
Uh, yeah, that's next door.
Oh, then you must know
my son, David Johnson.
Oh, damn.
You're Lamar?
I am he, and he is I,
and both of me is delighted to meet you.
(LAUGHS)
Yeah, you are definitely Dave's daddy.
(LAUGHS)
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm
just gonna pop in on my son.
Okay, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa. I mean, what's the rush?
I mean, you've been gone for 30 years,
what's 30 more minutes?
I think we should talk.
♪
Okay, we're gonna need lots
of spare parts, so I'm gonna
need you guys to hit up
car auctions, salvage yards.
Uh Oh, Reynard,
you know we started at 10:00.
Yeah, sorry, my girlfriend's cat.
Oh, no, I-I'm sorry.
Did-did the cat die?
Oh, no, she just has a cat.
You know how it is.
Uh, no, I-I don't. Uh, anyway,
as I was saying, I've compiled a list
of E.V. parts and models that we need.
We need motherboards touch screens,
batteries Oh, uh, uh, uh, Reynard.
Uh, R-Reynard, what are you doing, man?
Oh, my phone's at one percent, bro.
You can't just unplug things.
I-I was updating our servers.
Now I got to restart the update.
Here. Hey, let's just take ten.
(SCOFFS) Ten's a pretty short break.
You just got here.
Hey, lil' bro. I came to take
you out to lunch, but, uh,
looks like you got your hands full.
That guy sucks.
Yeah, Reynard.
You know, he was great when
we worked together at JPL.
We used to always screw around
together and make fun of the boss.
But now that I am the
boss, that guy sucks.
Daddy's gonna have to fire him.
Uh, wait, why can't you do it?
You know I'm not good at confrontation.
I sign every petition
outside of Trader Joe's,
no matter what they're for.
Dad always knocks the
clipboards out of their hand.
Well, Marty, you keep telling Pop
you want to be treated
like a full partner, right?
Well, drop the hammer down on that dude.
Go on, now.
And I-I've got to ask,
what were your parents thinking
- when they named you Lamar?
- Mm.
It's actually a combination
of my parents' names.
- Oh.
- Oh.
Well, that makes sense.
Latasha and Marcellus.
Of course.
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
Lamar, I got to be straight with you.
Your son and I are good friends.
Best friends?
He would say that, yes.
And that's why I wanted
to talk to you before
I took you over to see Dave.
He's got complicated feelings about you.
I-I'm sure you can understand why.
I get it. I've been out
of his life for years.
When I heard from him,
I couldn't find the words to write back,
so I just hopped on a bus and here I am.
(KNOCKING) Hey, Calvin,
I got your text. What's the emergency?
Oh, hi. Who's this? Oh,
my God, you're Lamar.
Are you Lamar? You're Lamar.
Dave's gonna freak out.
Don't let him see him. Oh, wait,
that's why you brought
him over here. I'm sorry.
I've had so much coffee this morning.
You must be Gemma.
Actually, it's Gemma with a "juh."
Well, you're as beautiful
as you are caffeinated.
Thank you.
Uh, Tina, Gemma, let me talk
to you guys for a second.
Oh. Oh, okay. Excuse us.
- (CHUCKLES)
- Yeah.
Look, uh,
Gemma, this is your call,
but should we take him to meet Dave?
Oh, God. I mean, he is Dave's father.
- Hi. Sorry.
- (OTHERS GASP)
But I'd love to go see my son now.
Yeah. Come on. Yeah, let's go.
Uh, Reynard, can we talk?
Sure. I'm doing literally nothing.
Uh
- Look, man (SIGHS)
- Hm?
I'm concerned that your talents
are being underused
here at the Fuse Box.
Clearly, you're capable
of much more, and
I think we need to make a change.
I've been feeling the same way.
You have? Oh, good.
You know, sometimes,
a-a job's requirements
and applicant skills just
don't sync up, you know?
- It's nobody's fault.
- Agreed.
Yeah. Well, I'm glad we talked.
You know, goodbye and, you know, uh,
good luck with that cat.
- Thanks for the pep talk.
- All right. (CHUCKLES)
- I'll see you at lunch.
- What the
Hi, honey.
Hey, buddy.
- You okay?
- Yeah.
Okay, um, why-why don't
you put down the box?
Just recycling.
Hey, you know if they take these?
Whoa!
- Whoa.
- Okay, uh, okay,
Dave, w-why don't you have a seat?
We have something we want to tell you.
And we don't want you to get upset.
Stop it.
Look, Dave,
someone's here to see you. Now,
you may think it's a bad thing,
but we are hoping it's a good thing.
Come on in.
David.
Son.
Lamar?
I want you to know
that I'm so, so sorry.
Okay, D-Dave, whoa, whoa, whoa.
You don't want to do this. Dave!
Oh.
Okay.
All right. Well, or that.
Do you remember that time
I took you to the movies
to see Fern Gully: The Last Rainforest,
but we went into the wrong theater?
It was Basic Instinct. (LAUGHS)
I can't believe it took us
an hour to figure that out.
Oh, your mom was so mad.
Yeah, mom was mad.
Mom was mad a lot back then.
E-Especially when you left
and never came home again.
Ooh.
That turned fast.
You know, I was really
mad, too. I still am.
And I certainly owe you an explanation.
Yeah, you do.
He's been very upset for a long time.
And that's understandable.
The truth is,
being absent wasn't my choice.
It was the choice of a jury of my peers.
- Oh, damn.
- Oh, damn.
Wait,
were you in prison?
Well yes.
Was it a violent crime?
Because if it was, my friend Calvin
is gonna take you right out of here.
No. No, no, no, I'm not a monster.
Yeah, and-and I'm not a bouncer, Dave.
I stole some money, but
it was a victimless crime.
I took a bunch of money
from some rich people.
I was like Robin Hood,
legendary hero of the common folk.
Who'd you give the money to?
Oh, I kept it.
I was not exactly like Robin Hood.
Dave, I so wanted to tell you,
but I didn't want you
to live with the stigma.
Your mother agreed.
Oh, boy, did she agree.
But the hardest thing about prison
was not being able to see my son.
What about when you got out?
I was a loser. I was embarrassed.
Then I pulled myself together
and I worked up the courage
to send you the friend request.
I'd seen pictures of you
and your family on Facebook.
So happy.
So, I've been waiting,
hoping we can have
some kind of relationship.
Well
face punch seems a lot less likely now.
Was face punch on the table?
- (LAUGHS) Oh, yeah, it was a face punch
- Oh.
and a nut kick and
something to do with jazz hands.
I don't know how Reynard didn't
understand I was firing him.
I told him he was being
underused at the Fuse Box,
that it wasn't a good
match for his skills
and that he'd be much happier elsewhere.
Well, that's pretty much perfect.
The only thing you left
out was "you're fired."
It was implied. It was
really, really implied.
(LAUGHS)
Look, it doesn't matter
how implied it was, Marty.
People are gonna hear
what they want to hear.
You know, if you said that to me,
I would just say, "Thanks, man."
He just said, "Thanks, man," didn't he?
Yeah.
Look, bro, as a coach,
sometimes I have to
give players bad news.
The thing I've learned is
it is best to be direct.
Well, it seems mean.
You are damn right it's mean,
but it is nicer in the long run.
Okay. Help me.
Teach me your blunt and brutal ways.
(SIGHS)
Okay. (CLEARS THROAT) I'll be you,
you'll be Reynard. All right.
- Yeah?
- Sit down.
Don't sit down. You're fired.
(GASPS)
Tina.
I don't mean to toot our own horns,
but we did a good thing
for Dave today.
Calvin, quick question, by any chance,
did you see an envelope full of cash
that I left on the counter?
Uh, no. Why?
Ugh. It's gone. It's the school's money.
And I left it here so I wouldn't
forget to move it into the safe,
but I forgot.
I think you're missing the
point of a safe. (LAUGHS)
You put things straight
into it to make it safe.
Hence the name safe.
Are you done?
(CHUCKLES) Come on, come on.
It's got to be here somewhere.
- (SIGHS)
- All right? We haven't had anybody
in the house who could have, uh
- Oh. Oh.
- Oh? Oh, oh, what?
What, what, what?
Lamar. He just told us
that he's been in prison.
He was?
And I gave that thief bottled water.
I knew I should have
just tapped his ass.
So they fed you dinner at 05:00?
Yeah, it wasn't my biggest
problem with prison.
But I got to be honest, I still
get hungry at 5:00. (CHUCKLES)
Do you have an apple?
Hey, Calvin, Tina,
Lamar was just telling us
- about his time in the joint.
- (DOOR CLOSES)
Did you know that you could
wash clothes in the toilet?
Hey, I did not.
But why don't you tell us
all about it in the kitchen?
- Yeah.
- Ooh, and get Lamar an apple.
Oh, yeah.
(SIGHS)
Hey, uh, Calvin, Tina,
I have to thank you
for everything that
you did for me today.
You know, I finally
feel like this huge
hole in my life has been filled.
Well, we're about to rip it back open.
What do you mean?
Dave,
Lamar took Tina's envelope of money.
What? CALVIN: Yeah.
He cracked your safe?
Money doesn't always
have to be in a safe.
Maybe somebody else took it.
It had to be him, Dave.
He's-he's the only one that's
been in our kitchen and prison.
I should have known.
Hate to be pushy, any ETA on that apple?
You have got some nerve.
An orange?
You know what? Lamar,
get out of my house.
- What?
- Get out of my house.
Get out of my house.
Whoa, Dave, what's going on?
This man is a thief.
Where's the money, Lamar?
What money?
You see?
That's exactly what a thief would say.
Look at him, hands
shaking, stomach growling.
It's 5:15. I'm starving.
He stole money from their kitchen.
The money from the play?
(GEMMA SIGHS) And I was
gonna give you an apple.
How could I be so naive?
You know, I really thought that
we were starting to build something.
Me too. Dave, you have to trust me
T-Trust? Why would I ever trust you?
You know, this is exactly
what I should have expected.
Everybody said that you
were a selfish loser.
Mom, all the kids at school,
every waitress at Pizza Hut.
But for some reason, I held out hope.
Get out of my house, Lamar.
Get out of my life.
You already know how to do that.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone.
- (DOOR CLOSES)
- (SIGHS) This is sad.
I know.
He's leaving with my money.
Poor Dave. I mean,
what a roller coaster.
What happened?
Well, Dave had a dad,
then he didn't have a dad,
then he got his dad back
and he lost him again.
And on top of that,
my fat envelope of cash got taken.
- Oh, you mean the one that was on the counter?
- Yeah.
Oh, I put that in the safe this morning.
What? Wh Why would you do that?
So it would be safe. (SHORT CHUCKLE)
That's why they call it a safe, Mama.
Hey, uh, Mal-Mal Mm-mmm.
Not now.
Oh, my God, Calvin.
And you accused that poor
man of stealing the money.
Hey, I mean, you got to
admit, it was a good guess.
Okay, uh, I'll check
arrivals, you check departures.
Dave, this is a bus station.
There's no arrivals or
departures. It's just a curb.
Right. Um
Okay, w-what if he's already
gone through security?
No security, just a curb.
Yeah, well, we must have missed him.
(SIGHS) Look, Dave,
I'm sorry I led you down this path.
He just looked guilty.
It's all right, Calvin.
You only got involved because, well,
you love me.
Da Wha
What'd I tell you about
throwing the L-word around
all willy-nilly like this in public?
Ooh, there he is. Lamar. Lamar.
David, what are you doing here?
Uh, well (SIGHS)
we wanted to tell you that
we found the money.
Oh, I'm glad.
- I told you I didn't take it.
- Yeah.
- Look, I'm partially responsible.
- He's totally responsible.
Look (SIGHS)
This is hard for me.
Let me make it easy. Apology accepted.
Yeah, no.
I'm not apologizing.
You know, I thought the worst of you
because you never gave me any reason
to trust you.
You have to earn that.
How can I do that?
I haven't quite figured
that part out yet.
But I'm willing to work on it with you.
Me too, son.
MAN: (OVER P.A.): Bus 343
is now departing for Oxnard.
That's my bus.
Hope I see you again soon.
Hey, uh, I-I have one
question, man. Um
You know, there is a-a Lamar,
Latasha, and a Marcellus.
So, where did David come from?
Oh, that was actually a
fight I lost with his mom.
I wanted to name him LaDavid.
Come on, lil' bro, you
got this, all right?
- You're right, you're right. I got this.
- Yeah. Okay.
(SINGSONGY): Good morning!
You are fired!
- What?
- Boom.
You are fired.
Terminated. Canned. Finito!
Your employment here has come to an end.
Sayonara and good luck
on future endeavors,
wherever they are, because
they will be elsewhere.
Because, to be clear,
Reynard Kittay,
you are fired.
- But the cat has a
- I don't give a damn about no cat!
- Malcolm?
- Yeah?
Please escort this man off the
premises in case he acts a fool.
- Let's go, Reynard.
- (SCOFFS)
Can I at least get my
Red Bull out fridge?
I drink your Red Bull.
I drink it up.
Wow.
Who are you?
I, my good man, am a boss.
Yes, you are. And you know what?
I think you deserve a parking spot.
Well, all right. (LAUGHS)
What-what Do we have one of those?
Well, sure we do, if you,
uh, paint some lines
next to the dumpster.
Go on, now.