Buffy the Vampire Slayer s05e22 Episode Script

Previously on "Buffy the Vampire Slayer": You are the Slayer.
Into each generation a slayer is born.
- Let's start with "Hi, I'm Buffy".
- Xander.
- Cordelia.
- Willow? - Mr Giles.
- Angel.
Gave me a pretty good run there.
Bet the blood's just pumpin'.
- Bet it's hot.
- Don't hurt me.
Don't hurtyou? What's going on? Help me.
Call the police.
- Get outta here, girl.
- Are you guys havin' a fight? Cos, you know, fighting's not cool.
- Get out of here.
- No, she wants to stay.
I don't mind a little appetiser.
Have you ever heard the expression "Biting off more than you can chew"? OK.
How about the expression "vampire slayer"? - What the hell you talkin' about? - Wow.
Never heard that one.
OK.
How about "Oh, God, my leg"? Oh, God! My leg! See? Now we're communicating.
Wow.
Been a long while since I met one who didn't know me.
You should get home.
- How'd you do that? - It's what I do.
Butyou're just a girl.
That's what I keep saying.
- Something goin' on out back? - Vampire.
- Anything? - Nothing you want to hear.
- The ritual is - Explain it again.
- There's nothing newto - Go through it again.
The Key was living energy.
It needed to be channelled, poured into a specific place at a specific time.
The energy would flow into that spot, the walls between the dimensions break down.
It stops, the energy's used up, the walls come back up.
Glory uses that time to get back into her own dimension, not caring that all manner of Hell will be unleashed on Earth in the meantime.
But only for a little while, right? The walls come back, no more Hell? That's only if the energy is stopped.
And nowthe key is human, is Dawn "The blood flows, the gates will open.
The gates will close when it flows no more.
" When Dawn is dead.
I have places to be.
Why blood? Why Dawn's blood? I mean, why couldn't it be a lymph ritual? Cos it's always got to be blood.
- We're not discussing dinner right now.
- Blood is life, lackbrain.
Why do you think we eat it? It's what keeps you going.
Makes you warm.
Makes you hard.
Makes you other than dead.
Course it's her blood.
Pretty simple math here.
We stop Glory before she can start the ritual.
- We still have a couple of hours.
- If my calculations are right.
But - I don't wanna hear it.
- I understand that.
No, you don't understand.
We are not talking about this.
Yes, we bloody well are! If Glory begins the ritual, if we can't stop her Come on.
Say it.
We're bloody well talking about this.
Tell me to kill my sister.
She's notyour sister.
No.
She's not.
She's more than that.
She's me.
The monks made her out of me.
I hold her, and I feel closer to her than It's not just the memories they built.
It's physical.
Dawn is a part of me.
The only part that I We'll solve this.
We will.
Don't have another coma, OK? If the ritual starts, every living creature in this and every other dimension imaginable will suffer unbearable torment and death.
Including Dawn.
Then the last thing she'll see is me protecting her.
You'll fail.
You'll die.
We all will.
I'm sorry.
I love you all, but I'm sorry.
OK.
All in favour of stopping Glory before the ritual.
Suggestions? Ideas? Time's a-wastin'.
- When you say you love us all - Shut up.
Willow, I betyou've got some dark spell a-brewin'.
Make her a toad? Little hoppy toad? We hit her with a hammer? Hoppy toad.
What about Ben? He can be killed, right? I know he's an innocent but not like Dawn innocent.
We could kill a regular guy.
God.
It's doubtful he'll surface again this close to the ritual.
We can expect it's Glory we're dealing with.
We don't have to kill her.
We just have to stop her from doing the ritual.
There's only the one time that she can do it, right? Yeah.
We get her on the ropes, we keep her occupied till it's too late.
OK.
But I'm still not hearing enough ideas.
- She's a god.
Let's think outside the box.
- You go think outside the bleeding box.
Yes, Anya.
Apart from your uninfectious enthusiasm, have you anything to contribu - The Dagon Sphere.
- Sorry? When Buffy first met Glory, she found that magical glowy sphere that was meant to repel Glory.
We've got it in the basement.
It might drive her away or hurt her.
And Olaf the troll god's enchanted hammer.
You wanna fight a god, use the weapon of a god.
Nah.
That thing's too heavy to Yeah.
Good.
- I like this.
Thanks.
- Here to help.
Wanna live.
Smart chicks are so hot.
You couldn't have figured that out in tenth grade? Well, we have some ideas if we could actually get Glory on the run, but But we still have no idea howto find her.
Big day.
It calls me.
I have to be there.
Big day.
They said you have to put this on for the ceremony.
What if I don't? - Come on.
Just - What if I don't like the colour? Look, I wish there was another way.
And I wish you'd fall on your head and drown in your own barf, so I guess we're both disappointed.
I think it'll be quick.
Actually, sir, the bleeding is quite a slow process to give the portal time to Thank you for the information.
- I'll do what I can - Change.
- What? - Change.
Be her.
I don't wanna look atyou.
- Dawn, I don't think you wanna - Be Glory.
Be Glory.
Will you just stop shouting already? So, what's the hubbub, bub? What do you got against old Benjy? He's a monster.
At leastyou're upfront about it.
Don't be so hard on the boy.
He just wants to live.
Most guys'd do the same.
Besides, he's probably the reason your sis and her little cartoon pals are still alive.
That little nagging pinch of humanity that makes me go for the hurt instead of the kill.
Lowering myself to trade blows with the Slayer when I should have just put my fist through her heart.
It's gotta be Ben.
Or maybe you just can't take her.
Funny thing.
You've been here a few hours, and I haven't seen big sis galloping in to save you.
She probably knows what a terrible mistake that'd be.
She's not afraid of you.
No, sweetie, baby.
I'm talking about the ritual.
Cos, you know, I bleed you, the portals open, but once you die they close.
The faster you die, the better for your sorry species.
I'm bettin' Buffy knows that.
Since she's not really your sister, I'm guessin' she isn't gonna show.
And if she does, it might not be to save you.
Buffy.
- Sure you're not gonna tire yourself out? - I'm sure.
We're still working on ideas.
Time's short, but best leave it to the last moment.
If we go in too early and she takes us out, no chance of getting her to miss her window.
Then we wait.
I imagine you hate me right now.
- I love Dawn.
- I know.
But I've sworn to protect this sorry world.
Sometimes that means saying and doing what other people can't.
What they shouldn't have to.
You try and hurt her, and you know I'll stop you.
I know.
This is how many apocalypses for us now? Six at least.
Feels like a hundred.
I've always stopped them.
Always won.
Yes.
I sacrificed Angel to save the world.
I loved him so much.
But I knew what was right.
I don't have that any more.
I don't understand.
I don't know howto live in this world if these are the choices.
If everything just gets stripped away, I don't see the point.
I just wish I just wish my mom was here.
The spirit guide told me that death is my gift.
Guess that means a slayer really is just a killer after all.
- I think you're wrong about that.
- It doesn't matter.
If Dawn dies, I'm done with it.
I'm quitting.
Everything is prepared.
OK, campers, it's almost stab time.
You two, get her.
No.
Buffy! See you in a few.
Any luck? Have you found the Dagon Sphere? I'm sure it's here.
Just be a minute.
Yeah, we're on it.
Let's look over here, where we didn't look yet.
- Time is a factor.
- Yes.
Not to worry.
So, are you more relaxed? No.
No? I mean, it sounded like you arrived.
No.
Yes.
I had the pleasure moment, and the blissful calm that comes right after it.
But it lasted two seconds and now I'm terrified again.
Well, you don't have to be.
What? Spike's sex-bot.
Why didn't they just melt it down into scrap? Maybe Willow wanted it.
I don't think Willowfeels that way about Buffy.
- She's gone through a lot of changes, but - To study it.
Right.
Robotics.
Science.
- Pervert.
- Other pervert.
And don't frighten me like that.
God, who would put something like that there? Is this supposed to be some sort of sick joke? I mean, things aren't bad enough? This is an omen.
No, it's an omen.
It's a higher power, telling me through bunnies that we're all gonna die.
Oh, God.
No, it's not.
It's OK.
No.
You see, usually when there's an apocalypse, I skedaddle.
But now I love you so much I have inappropriately timed sex, try to think of ways to fight a god, and worry terribly that something might happen to you, and also that something'll happen to me.
I have guilt that I'm not more worried about everyone else, but I just don't have enough.
I'm on total overload, and I don't thinkthat I could be more nervous than I am right now.
Care to wager on that? Anya, you wanna marry me? - Can I take that as a maybe? - You're proposing to me.
Yes.
You're proposing to me cos we're gonna die.
And you think it's romantic and sexy, and you know you won't have to go through with it cos the world's gonna end.
- I'm proposing to you, Anya, because it's not.
- You can't knowthat.
I believe it.
And I think we're gonna get through this.
I think I'm gonna live a long and silly life, and I'm not interested in doing that withoutyou around.
- OK.
- OK? Yes.
I mean, yes.
- No.
- No? After.
Give it to me when the world doesn't end.
- What have you got for me? - Some ideas.
Well, notions.
Or theories based on wild speculation.
Did I mention I'm not good under pressure? I need you, Will.
You're my big gun.
I'm your No, I was never a gun.
Someone else should be the gun.
I could be a cudgel.
Or a pointy stick.
You're the strongest person here.
- You knowthat, right? - No.
Will, you're the only person that's ever hurt Glory.
At all.
You're my best shot at getting her on the ropes, so don't get a jelly belly on me now.
Well, I do sort of have this one idea.
But, last few days, I've mostly been looking into ways to help Tara.
I knowthat shouldn't be my priority Of course it should.
Well, I've been charting their essences.
Mapping out.
I think, if I can get close enough, I may be able to reverse what Glory did, take back what she took from Tara.
It might weaken Glory, or make her less coherent.
Or it might make all our heads explode.
Buffy? I'll try to work it.
Don't worry, love.
It won't be long.
Bitch.
I'm supposed to work on the factors.
I'm not I'm gonna bring you back.
No, that's good.
That could be pivotal.
- Thank you, guys.
- You're gonna need some - Way ahead of you.
We have time? - If you hurry.
OK.
I'll grab some weapons too.
- I'm looking for something in a broadsword.
- Don't swing that thing near me.
- I happen to be - A glorified bricklayer? - I'm also a swell bowler.
- Has his own shoes.
- The gods themselves do tremble.
- Spike, shutyour mouth.
Come with me.
Weapons are by the TV.
I'll grab the stuff upstairs.
Buffy If you wanna just hand them over the threshold Come in, Spike.
Presto.
No barrier.
I won't bother with the small stuff.
Couple of good axes should hold off Glory's mates while you take on the lady herself.
We're not all gonna make it.
You knowthat? Yeah.
Always knew I'd go down fightin'.
I'm counting on you to protect her.
Till the end of the world.
Even if that happens to be tonight.
I'll be a minute.
I know you'll never love me.
I knowthat I'm a monster.
Butyou treat me like a man.
And that's Getyour stuff.
I'll be here.
She will come to you soon.
We on schedule? Yes, it's time.
Will? Tara, baby? Is there somewhere you should be? They held me down.
No one's holding you.
It's the big day, right? Do you wanna go? You're a killer.
This is all set down.
Stay close but don't crowd her.
We'll follow in a minute.
Everybody knows their jobs.
Remember, the ritual starts - we all die.
And I'll kill anyone who comes near Dawn.
Well, not exactly the St Crispin's Day speech, was it? - We few.
We happy few.
- We band of buggered.
- Shpedoinkel.
- What is that? The portal must open up there.
Will, you're up.
Need anything? Could use a little courage.
The real kind.
But thanks.
You.
What are you doing here? She's with me.
What the frickin' hell did that bitch do to me? You look fine.
Truly.
She made a little She made a hole.
- I need a brain to eat.
- Take mine, O Groovetastic One.
I said a brain, you worthless dirt.
Big day.
I got places to be.
Big day.
Need a brain.
Suppose I could always use yours.
OK, then.
Come and get it.
You don't seem very well.
Your little witch bitch gave me kind of a headache there.
But if you thinkthis is gonna last I notice you're talking, whereas in your position, I would attack me.
O, Most Sweaty-Naughty-Feelings-Causing One, should we Go guard the girl.
- This is a - Diversionary tactic? Go guard.
It's strange.
You're not as blurry with speed as usual.
- The witch - It's not her.
Might be this.
I heard it's supposed to repel you.
So my guess is you probably shouldn't touch it, either.
You're gonna wish you Stand fast.
Kill anyone who dares approach.
This will be our day of glory.
- Well punned.
- It just called out to me.
Tara.
Willow? - Tara? - Willow - I got so lost.
- I found you.
I will always find you.
You know what? I'm feeling a little better.
And now I'm a little bored.
I'm sorry.
Cos you're about Wow.
The Slayer's a robot.
Did everybody else know the Slayer was a robot? Glory? You're not the brightest god in the heavens.
Buffy! I'm up here! Buffy! No, you don't.
Buffy! I'm up here! Buffy! You lostyour hammer, sweetcheeks.
What are you gonna hit me with now? Whatever's handy.
And the glorified bricklayer picks up a spare.
- Has anyone noticed we're going backwards? - It's crossed my mind.
As long as Buffy can keep Glory down long enough, it doesn't matter.
Only a few minutes left to start the ritual.
You.
You can help me.
Untie me.
Please.
Help me, she's coming.
Well, it seems she's running a bit late, is the thing.
And if Her Splendidness can't be here in time to bleed you Hey, kid.
Wanna see a trick? - How we doing? - So far it's a tie.
We haven't got up to Dawn, but then neither has anyone else.
Someone's up there.
- OK, we gotta charge or something.
- We tried that.
- Spike, can you hear me? - Yeah, loud and clear.
- Is there someone up there with Dawn? - Yeah, can't tell who.
- Are you talking to us? - Get up there.
Go now.
- Yeah, but - Go.
Well, what do you know? It's just about that time.
Spike.
Doesn't a fella stay dead when you kill him? Look who's talking.
Come on, Doc.
Let's you and me have a go.
I do have a prior appointment.
- This won't take long.
- No, I don't imagine it will.
You're just a mortal.
You couldn't understand my pain.
Then I'll just have to settle for causing it.
- You can't kill me.
- No.
But my arm's not even tired yet.
You don't come near the girl, Doc.
I don't smell a soul anywhere on you.
Why do you even care? I made a promise to a lady.
Then I'll send the lady your regrets.
No.
No.
- Stop it.
- You're a god.
Make it stop.
I'm sorry.
Tell her it's over.
She missed her shot.
She goes.
She ever, ever comes near me and mine again We won't.
I swear.
I guess we're stuck with each other, baby.
Can you move? Need a minute.
- She could've killed me.
- No, she couldn't.
Never.
And sooner or later Glory will re-emerge, and make Buffy pay for that mercy.
And the world with her.
Buffy even knows that.
And still she couldn't take a human life.
She's a hero, you see.
- She's not like us.
- Us? Shallow cuts.
Shallow cuts.
Let the blood flowfree.
- Dawn.
- Buffy.
This should be interesting.
- Here.
- Buffy, it hurts.
I got it.
Come here.
You're gonna be OK.
- Go.
- Buffy, it's started.
Xander.
Anya.
- I'm sorry.
- It doesn't matter.
What are you doing? - I have to jump.
The energy.
- lt'll kill you.
I know.
Buffy, I know about the ritual.
- I have to stop it.
- No.
I have to.
Look at what's happening.
Buffy, you have to let me go.
Blood starts it, and until the blood stops flowing, it'll never stop.
You know you have to let me.
It has to have the blood.
Cos it's always got to be blood.
It's Summers blood.
It's just like mine.
She's me.
The monks made her out of me.
Death is your gift.
- Death - is your gift.
- Buffy, no.
- Dawnie, I have to.
- No.
- Listen to me.
Please, there's not a lot of time, listen.
Dawn, listen to me.
I love you.
I will always love you.
This is the work that I have to do.
Tell Giles Tell Giles lfigured it out.
And I'm OK.
And give my love to my friends.
You have to take care of them now.
You have to take care of each other.
You have to be strong.
Dawn, the hardest thing in this world is to live in it.
Be brave.
Live.
For me.