Northern Exposure s05e22 Episode Script
Grand Prix
Tach it up, race fans.
Chris here with a trackside update.
Eight days and counting till Sunday's starting pistola in a grueling contest of man and machine versus Mr.
Clock in what promises to be the der Nüburgring of wheelchair racing.
I've already seen some tour busses coming in- people wantin'to see these superb athletes.
Got the winner of this year's Boston marathon here, the winner of the Atlanta Peachtree.
And we've got some losers here, too, people.
But that's what makes a horse race.
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
All righty.
Hi.
Sorry I'm late.
I'm starved.
Special's rabbit cacciatore.
Lester Haynes is building a new house.
I know.
With an indoor pool.
That's just to start.
He's building "Concert hall quality" stereo system throughout.
And guess who's going to wire it up? Neil Nasmith? Wrong.
He fired Neil.
I was just there.
Lester wants me to do it.
That's good.
This is the biggest job I ever had.
For the first time, I'm the man with the plan.
It's nice.
It's financial security.
Yeah, makes you want to think about the future.
You know, I could get a new place.
I mean, a bigger place.
So, uh, what brings you to Cicely? Um, the marathon.
Right.
Uh, sorry.
I'm just a little preoccupied right now.
Yeah, well, uh, I've got the best training program I've ever had, Ed.
And finally I've got a racing chair that I have confidence in.
But I came down with this stupid tennis elbow.
Bad timing.
Yeah.
Maurice's new race doctor put her on, uh, corticosteroids.
Uh, and Naprosyn- the same things I was given at the sports medicine institute in Seattle.
But the meds never cut it.
If this elbow costs me a few hundredths of a second, I'm sitting there with bronze or silver around my neck.
And I'm not really into base metals.
Wow.
Ed, hey, is there anything you can do? Listen, I'm a firm believer in alternative medicine.
No, it's not that.
It's just- Well, see, the whole " shamaneering" thing- I don't think it's something I can get into right now.
See, I've got this script- the shaman low-budget picture thing I've been trying to set up for about six months now.
And, well, turns out the new Steven Seagal picture, On Deadly Ground- It has some of the same action beats in it.
I just got my fourth rejection.
As you can see, I got a lot of work to do.
Wait a minute.
What about a poultice? Like Leonard always talks about.
I- I don't know.
Maybe mugwort in a topical application.
We want to thank The Brick for providing this tasty meal.
It is with a sense of great pride and humility that we welcome these superb athletes from all over the face of the globe.
Names such as France's Marc Pettier and our two-time national champion- Cliff Zweibel.
In order to pamper these dynamos while our own Joel Fleischman is, uh, north of the 60, I have brought in Grant Saperstein, M.
D.
, F.
A.
C.
S.
, from L.
A.
Now, many of my friends and acquaintances have come to me and asked, "Maurice Minnifield, why are you an advocate for wheelchair athletics?" As some of you know, I had an accident a few months ago that landed me in a wheelchair.
I learned firsthand the stupidity and inconvenience of having inaccessible business establishments and thoroughfares.
It seems like your range of motion is maybe a little better.
But the smell just gets worse.
Oh.
Uh- That-That's the gray fox doody.
What? Well,just a smidgen, kind of as an emulsifier.
you people- with your grit, determination and skill- will do for Cicely.
To the athletes.
Hey, Lester.
Who'd you have to bribe to get this past the plan check? Oh, Maurice.
To what do I owe the honor? Oh, you don't owe an honor.
You owe the bank.
Well, not exactly, Maurice.
Not exactly.
What, you going out of pocket on this thing? Well, right now, I'm going out of my mind.
Building and Safety- If these guys had a nickel for every nit they pick, heck, they could afford a place just like this.
I see you favor a small master.
Oh, no.
The master's back there.
This is the observatory.
That's how come there's no roof members.
It's gonna have all-steel framing here 'cause the ceiling's gonna slide away.
I've got a couple hundred pounds of Zeiss glass gonna sit right here.
Really? Can you imagine the power this place is gonna pull? And here's the guy who's making it all possible for me.
Ted.
Hey, Maurice.
I was dyin' before Mr.
Banks came around.
This guy is putting in a reverse synchro something- Well, you tell him, Ted.
It's a reverse synchrons generator.
Improves power from 0.
8 to 1.
0.
And I'm gonna be completely independent of government utilities.
Damn.
Hey, what's up, Ed? Hey, Sam.
I don't wanna talk to a paralegal.
I wanna talk to the lawyer himself.
Uh, all right.
I gotta go.
I gotta go.
Ed? Ed Chigliak? Dr.
Saperstein.
Ed, wait up a second.
There's something I gotta ask you.
Uh- Did you prescribe a mugwort poultice for Kim Greer? That's right.
Listen, I have a great respect for, uh, non-Western, indigenous medicines.
Tao, chakras- all that stuff.
And listen, this masseuse at Bally's gave me an acupressure massage- really relieved my sciatica.
Huh.
Neat.
Well, neat, yes.
But my point is, you really can't interfere with a course of treatment I've undertaken with a patient, right? Well, isn't everybody entitled to a second opinion? Absolutely.
Second, third, if there's the slightest doubt about a diagnosis.
Unfortunately, that's not the case with Kim's medial epicondylitis.
Which is what tennis elbow is.
Ah.
Tennis elbow does not respond to mugwort.
To be honest with you, Ed, I don't know that the heck mugwort is.
Anyway, the patient's point tenderness distal to the epicondyle shows some relief with the one-percent lidocaine.
Which coincidentally proves my differential diagnosis.
Yeah, but, uh, the pain keeps coming back.
So far.
But things aren't helped by a topical ointment, which has caused a secondary dermatitis running clear up the arm.
Uh, that's a rash.
Let's cut to the chase.
Ed, are you covered by malpractice insurance? No.
Uh, didn't think I needed it.
Hmm.
Well, Kim came to me, and- Patients turn on you, Ed.
Like that.
Yesterday's savior is tomorrow's Mengele.
I know whereof I speak.
Why do you think I'm in Alaska as race physician? I was partner in one of the top plastic surgery and maxillofacial practices on the West Side of Los Angeles.
I lost it- everything.
Boom.
That's all they left me.
Wow.
And was it my fault? I told her repeatedly- " Wear a hat.
" Damn.
We just can't seem to get past that brick wall at 24.
31.
I thought you guys had the chair that finally eliminated frame flex.
You mean that was flexing on you? Yeah.
What the hell is happening here? I don't know.
Hop out.
Let me take a look.
Tubular chrome-moly fork, leveraged steering, custom aluminum " V" cage design.
Carbon-fiber wheels.
I wonder if I made a wrong turn here.
Well, if it is a mistake, it's Mike's.
He invented the Minnifield ZX1000.
Yeah, and I invested in it.
It seemed like such a no-brain idea back in rehab.
I mean, there's so many spinal cord injuries surviving these days that, uh wheelchair athletics is a growth industry.
I mean, it's not the microchip, but we can expand.
We could manufacture skis for able-bodied people.
Or mountain bikes.
What? Does your enthusiasm for wheelchair sports have even the teensiest bit to do with that article in Alaska Business that said Minnifield Communications had bailed out on its employee health plan? Listen, Cliff.
I've been wantin' to talk to you.
That bandana- Do you intend to wear that in the race? It's better than a sunburned forehead.
It doesn't present the proper image for Team Minnifield.
You look more like Long John Silver than a wholesome athlete.
Well, he was a crip.
You listen.
When George Steinbrenner sends his team out on the field, nobody's wearing a bandana.
Nobody's wearing a bowler.
Nobody's wearing a do-rag.
They are all wearing the official New York Yankees baseball cap.
Do you understand that? You.
Edski! What up? - What are you doing here? - I hope you don't mind.
Your heater vent was open, so I came in.
Hey, you know, that Bettie Serveert is dope! You want a sandwich? I suppose it'd be too much trouble for you to shut my fridge.
Hey.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I just thought maybe you'd like to join me in a little celebration here.
It's a red-letter day for me.
Why? Why? Because you're not gonna cure that girl's elbow.
How do you know about her? The poultice didn't work, and neither did the healing stories.
I mean, that- that was laughable.
What do you want from me? Ed.
Nothing's gonna work, Ed.
And you wanna know why? No.
Let me tell you.
Well, first of all, you're a terrible shaman.
That's why.
And " B," your patient has to win at all costs.
You see, Ed, you're dealing with the demon of external validation.
And I'm here to tell ya, doc, you can't beat external validation.
You want to know why? It's because it feels so good.
You're trying to get me to not help Kim.
I care bubkes about Kim, Ed.
I'm your demon- low self-esteem.
You're just making it worse for her, Ed.
Every time you go at her with a poultice, you feed her need to be admired from without.
You reinforce her wish to compulsively compete while simultaneously undermining her confidence.
Get out.
Oh.
Okay.
This is me leavin'.
You can shout at me all you want, Ed.
But External Validation- He's gonna grind you up like a bug.
He eats guys like you with low self-esteem as tapas.
Tapas.
It's open.
Hey.
Maggie's not here.
Oh, that's okay.
Actually, I just came by to see how you were doin'.
I'm now six seconds behind my time, my arm feels like it's on fire, and Heidi Beck had her fastest practice run ever yesterday.
There's some good news though.
Could you get me that envelope right there? Oh, you read it.
All right.
Uh.
"Dear Kim Greer, this is to tell you that you have been named Athlete of the Year"- Hey.
" by Miss Andrews's third-grade class.
Rudy Perpich Elementary School, Blooming Prairie, Minnesota.
" Isn't that sweet? They read about me in Sports 'N Spokes.
I don't know how they knew I was here.
External validation.
A little of that never hurts, huh? No, I mean, that's the problem, Kim.
What's the problem? You want to win.
Yeah.
So? See, that's all you're thinking about- is winning.
You're confirming your sense of self-worth through outward reward instead of through inner appreciation.
Ed, you sound like a daytime talk show.
No, I tell you, Kim.
That is your demon- external validation.
Mine is low self-esteem.
So who am I to be telling you what to do? I should probably just shout my mouth.
Huh? Thing is, Kim, maybe you should just lay off the arm for a while, not even run this race.
Ed, that's nuts.
Come on.
Besides, I could never drop out now, disappoint kids like those.
There are so few role models around.
Oh, boy.
What? See, Kim, even if your arm gets better and even if you win, it's never gonna be enough.
You're always gonna get hung up on that next trophy or plaque.
You're never gonna get enough validation.
And you're never gonna feel like a winner even if you win.
Ed, there is nothing wrong with wanting to win.
It's what drives an athlete- the competitive spirit, the need to be number one.
That's a healthy instinct.
All right.
Catch you later.
Ted, how are you doin' today? Haulin' butt, boss.
Great.
Listen, Roman had a notion on the indoor pool.
Oh, yeah? Yeah.
We, uh, flop the changing room with theJacuzzi.
Flop them? Yeah.
He smartly pointed out nobody noticed that theJacuzzi room is twice as big as the changing room.
Then I thought, " What the heck?" The changing room has the better view, which it doesn't need.
Well, I already wired the rooms according to plan.
I put the breaker in just yesterday.
So my family and I- We're in theJacuzzi and we're lookin' at the back of the garage.
Great.
Well, I could rip it all out and rewire.
Well, you know, blueprints are just that.
Yeah.
Listen, why don't, uh, you come up to the old place tonight? A few of my friends- evenings, we get together in my den.
Houseboy makes Filipino barbecue, and we talk hunting and watch the Sonics.
Wow.
That'd be great.
Well, you don't have plans, do you? Well, no, not really.
Good.
I'll see you there.
Hi.
Come in.
What's the matter? I can't have dinner.
How come? Lester wants me to come up to his current house and go over some stuff or something.
I made Cornish hens.
What can I do? He wants you to work at night too? Meet some people or somethin'.
I don't know what his problem is.
I just started workin' for this guy.
What am I supposed to say to him? "I have plans" or " Can we talk about this tomorrow?" Do you think I want to sit around with a bunch of guys eating Filipino food- whatever the heck that is- and B.
S.
'ing about the building trades when I can be here having a nice dinner, playing Pictionary later? Oh, boy.
This is just what I needed today.
See, look.
Right here.
Look at your body position.
Mike'll tell you you got to tuck in.
I think, Maurice, he was deliberately easing up.
Hmm.
I knew there wasn't anybody on me.
What's happenin' here, guy? How come you're not drafting Pettier, number 27? I couldn't get him in front of me, so I decided to forget strategy and just hammer.
Mmm.
Excuse me, Maurice, but what's the sum total of your wheelchair-pushing experience- from the nurses' station to the head? And you're gonna tell me how to win races? Watch the footage, dude.
I'm stronger.
When I take my pulls, Pettier's and Hordyke's stroke rates go right through the roof.
- Yeah, but are you visualizing victory, son? - Maurice, I won the race.
Winning is a given.
You've got a chance here to set a new record for the 26.
2 in the Cicely Sunrise.
That is the kind of aura that the Minnifield ZX needs.
So anyway, Myra and I are going through the museum.
Beautiful tapestries everywhere.
And her feet are killin' her.
Jimmy, turn that down, will you, please? So she goes down, and she sits down on the staircase.
The guard looks over at her, you know, very sternly, down his nose, you know? Madame, ce n'est pas un cinéma.
Yeah.
" This is not a movie theater.
" Now, is that not the French? Madame, ce n'est pas un cinéma.
Well, that's gonna do me.
I have to work in the morning.
Yeah, I'd better bag it too.
You'll ream me if I don't complete that sale for you by tomorrow.
Again.
I'll see ya.
Good night, Ted.
Good night,Julian.
Good night, everybody.
Is this an original Warhol? Hmm? Yeah.
Wow.
A real Warhol.
I had a real good time.
Yeah, it was fun.
Mm-hmm.
I didn't know Filipino people ate okra.
You know, I wonder what it's like to be, you know, really rich.
What do you mean? Well, like, uh, Armand Hammer, you know.
Somebody like that.
Oh, right.
Yeah, to never have to worry about money.
To never have to ask yourself, "Gee, I wonder what this is gonna cost.
" Those people here tonight- Every single one of them is taking a percentage.
I mean, it's draining.
How can I ever expect to accumulate anything? And three and one.
You in the bathrobe- Okay.
And again.
Here we go.
Crank it up.
Burn, baby, burn! Come on now! Whoo! That's fabulous! Well, hello.
Hi.
Oh.
Uh, sorry to disturb you.
I was following a little green man, but I lost him.
He moved his trailer recently.
I don't know which side of the camp.
Are you all right? Mariangela's passed out in the back bedroom again.
She turned my sister's birthday party into a- a twisted simulacrum of a celebration.
Well, I'd better be going.
I've gotta find External Validation.
I provided that for her for the first few years.
Now it's- it's as if- Well, good-bye.
Are you sure you don't wanna come in? I got a pitcher of margaritas.
Nice Beemer.
Hey.
Get away from the car.
External Validation? Yeah.
Here.
Now get out.
Oh, no.
I'm here for Kim Greer.
Oh, yes.
You're Chigliak, aren't you? Low self-esteem.
Ed.
What's your name? Oscar Pulitzer.
Well, I'm here because Kim's my patient.
You have to love and respect her so much, don't you? She's one of my best customers.
I want you to leave her alone.
Her parents were driven.
High achievers, demanding, no introspection.
Kim started chasing me when she was seven, when she took up the clarinet.
We're made for each other.
And what God has brought together, let no shaman put asunder.
All right then.
What's this? You're gonna fight me? For Kim? Yes, I am.
Let's get it on.
Okay, bud.
Ed.
Ed.
Ed.
What's wrong with you, man? Has your brain turned to onion dip? I'm not listening to you.
So you're gonna fight Oscar, huh? He's gonna dance all over your face.
- Tell him what degree black belt you are.
Go on.
Tell him.
- Who can count 'em? I can't back down.
I'm her shaman.
Remember eighth grade? Bob Scaligieri? Huh? One shot to the jewels! You were down, rollin' around.
And all in front of your girlfriend.
Let's go.
The grove? Let's do it.
Brewed up a pot of decaf.
Anybody care for a cup? Great.
What are those? These? My lucky shoes.
You're not gonna wear 'em in the race, are you? Well, yeah.
I'd rethink that if I were you.
What do you mean? Here.
Try these puppies on.
Why? Because I wanna see how they look.
You're wearin' them in the marathon.
Maurice, hello.
I don't even need shoes.
I only wear these 'cause of an old superstition.
I'm certainly not wearing those.
Why the hell not? I'm riding with my lucky shoes, just like I've done in every race since '87.
Mm-mmm.
No, you're not.
I prenegotiated a deal with Reebok.
I can't believe you sold the advertising space on my feet.
What about the back of the chair? You're not gonna leave that blank, are you? BullFrog Sunblock.
Forget it.
You wear 'em if you want.
Look, son, you'd better wake up and smell the Gatorade.
I hate to be the one to break it to you, but sports is business.
And promotion is what stokes the whole machine.
I'm a pragmatist.
I've got an I.
Q.
above room temperature, but I've never seen anybody as anal about this stuff as you are.
I'm in venture capital, and I'm in it to come out on top.
I'm not asking you to wear cigarette signage, but you are riding for Reebok.
Now, I own that chair.
I've been payin' your expenses, and if I want to recoup a little bit, I will recoup.
Ready for lunch? I tried to call you at work, but you left already.
Uh-oh.
I have to stay.
Dr.
Saperstein isn't familiar with the staff.
And he's kind of upset.
Why? Uh, something clawed through the top of his convertible last night.
Well, there goes our six-month anniversary celebration.
Yeah.
Am I late? I'm really sorry.
Mm-mmm.
Good.
One of the sponsors choppered us up to the top of the glacier to the east to do some extreme.
I couldn't pass it up.
Buddies of mine skied glacier at Chamonix.
Eh! Your snow is very wet.
Um, Dr.
Saperstein, this is Ted Banks.
Hey, Ted.
Hi.
So I'll just get changed, and, uh, we'll get to it.
I wanna show you somethin'.
What? - For me? - Of course that's for you.
Wow.
That's nice.
- I almost didn't wanna give it to you.
- Why not? - It's plain.
- Well, it's simple, but it's pretty.
And it's the thought that counts.
- Great.
- Oh, what'd I say? I wanted to get you something nice.
I didn't wanna get you some cheap bracelet and pretend it's the same as diamonds.
It's not the same.
And it's not the thought that counts.
Things count too.
Well, not to me.
I always said to myself that money doesn't matter.
But that's because I know I'm never gonna have it, so I don't let it matter.
But you see nice stuff, and you want it.
Everybody wants it.
I wish you hadn't stopped by.
Ed? Ed? Ed? Ed? Ed.
Are you all right? Ed.
Hey.
Are you okay? Hey, are these your pajamas? We found them in the middle of Main Street.
Mrs.
Grippo ran over them with her truck.
Mrs.
Grippo? Yeah.
Oh.
Can you get up? Can you- Can you get up, Ed? I think you need to see a doctor.
All right? Come on.
Let's just try.
Golly.
You all right? Boy, your electrolyte levels are way down.
You're showing signs of severe dehydration.
Ed? Can you remember what you were doing in the street at night without clothes? I gotta get back and work on my script.
Ed.
Ed.
Where were you? Oh, that's Coffee Pot Mountain- the Inupiaq name.
Without cold-weather gear? Ed, when? For three days and three nights.
Ed, for heaven's sake, you were in the store yesterday.
I was? Uh-huh.
You-Your stack of juice oranges kept collapsing.
Remember? I went out to the crossroads.
This power spot.
Crossroads? What, like in those blues songs? Ed! What are you talking about? Need to get him on a glucose-sodium drip.
I.
V.
? Really? Ed? He'll be okay.
Boy.
Ed.
Oh, there you are.
Hiya, boss.
I'm goin' down to the stables, and I'll be back about 4:00 for a meeting with the borough.
Oh, do you have horses? Yeah, I got a few.
Quarter horses.
I'd like to have more, but it's a sore point with Myra.
She says they're a money pit.
But that's because she doesn't like them.
Mmm.
You know what I think it is? She resents me.
No way.
Yeah.
Listen, does a person get where I'm at by going to endless meetings at their kids' school every night? You married? No.
I have a girlfriend.
Uh-huh, and how does she feel about your career? I mean, does she ever complain because you work too hard? Ever try to make you feel guilty about it? A little, yeah.
Yeah.
"'Twas ever thus.
" Uh, Lester.
Yeah.
Before you go, uh, this is the bill on Mrs.
Haynes's studio.
Wait a minute.
I'm a little confused.
Wh-What's this figure here? Uh, that's the labor.
That's the cost of labor? I'm a little surprised here.
Did you do the work yourself? Well, I kicked down the rough-in to Buddy Talleksen.
And that's the lowest figure you could get out of Buddy? Well, yeah.
But what about your commission? What do you mean? I'm just blue-skying here, but is there some relief there? Relief? You want me to cut my commission? Um, I don't know.
Look, maybe I shouldn't have said that, but I thought we had a bond.
Oh, you-you mean, like, the Native American discount.
Well, yes, if that's how you choose to describe it.
Listen, I work with my people whenever I can.
What about Neil Nasmith? Well, Neil's gone, isn't he? Just like Custer.
Oh.
Well, I'll- I'll work with these numbers.
Okay.
I'll see you later.
Chris in the Mornin' T.
C.
'ing some racing " B" in a flash.
Ruth-Anne Miller still has Sunrise Marathon sweats and T's, plus sun visors.
They're priced to go.
Also for you athletes runnin' the race tomorrow, she's havin' a special on WD-40.
Get this.
Oddsmakers are giving even money on relative newcomer Kim Greer's chances against the one-woman Panzer battalion- Germany's Heidi Beck, in the women's division.
Good luck, ladies.
Let's avoid a pile-up.
This just in.
Spectator parking's now available at Maurice Minnifield's pear orchard.
That's 12 bucks a day for cars, That does not- repeat- not include water hookup.
Ed.
Ed.
Ed? How you doin'? Oh.
Well, Dr.
Saperstein had you on a glucose drip all morning.
He sent you home with these prescription high-nutrient drinks.
Hmm? I'm gonna make you some soup.
Kim- I'm gonna come right to the point here.
Physically, your elbow's not as bad as you think it is.
You're thinking about my elbow still? I tried to fight External Validation for you, Kim.
He's just too tough.
You gotta fight him yourself.
I can't do it for you.
See, Kim, your head is telling you that you've gotta be number one or you have no identity.
But your heart is telling you something completely different, and it's talking to your elbow.
Yeah, but, Ed, she really wants to be number one.
No, Maggie.
It's just that, well, what if she comes in number two? Well, then she's number two.
No, it's not "Well, then she's number two.
" My whole family will be there.
My friends.
Like the clarinet, Kim.
Did I tell you about my clarinet? You quit.
You gave up all that music because your Cousin Gina was the lead singer in a garage band.
And you just knew there was no way you could compete with that.
I put in that call over an hour and a half ago.
Yeah, yeah.
Everything is going along fine.
Then I came down here tonight, and my Romanée-Conti was the temperature of bath water.
You fried the compressor.
Oh, no.
You're kiddin' me.
I don't kid on double time.
No wonder it overheated.
You're supposed to vacuum the coils at least three times a year.
I told Chigliak that.
Yeah, Chigliak.
Hmm.
Well, you're, uh, workin' for Lester Haynes, huh? Yep.
I wonder how much that phantasmagoria out there he's building's worth.
I wonder how much it cost him.
You got any idea? - No.
- Wonder what the overruns are costing.
Brand-new unit.
But you got the house on the hill, so what the hey.
What are you beefin' about? I'm the one payin' for it.
There you go.
Man, you guys.
You wanna know how much he's spendin' up there? I'll tell you- a half a mil on his wife's studio alone.
But he wants me to cut him a discount.
Of course he does.
That's his function in life.
Function.
His function.
Where's the joke? How do you think he amassed all that wealth? - I guess I expected more.
- Well, that was your mistake, wasn't it? I expected taste and class or- or an elevated way of conducting himself.
Like Louis XV orJoe Kennedy Sr.
? Well, no.
Let me tell you something, my friend.
A man named Fitzgerald said it pretty well.
"The rich are different.
They have more money.
" Good night, Ted.
Try not to do any loud hammering.
Can I have your attention, please? We have a lost child- Now, remember.
Tuck in.
You're welcome.
- No.
Tuck.
Tuck.
- Oh.
Yes.
And don't go all out on Heartbreak Hill.
Are you understanding anything I'm saying to you? Well,just do the best you can.
Hey, I read about this kid Soong.
He's fast, but he's raw.
What happened to Zweibel? This guy's better.
If you say so.
He's the new generation.
Besides, Las Vegas is givin' me So no matter how it comes out, I'm a winner, right? Wait a second.
You have money on the other guy the whole time, huh? Downside protection.
Oh, man, you're too much.
Yeah.
Where do I get that action? Ah.
Hey, Ed.
Up and around, huh? Yeah.
I'm not up to writing yet though.
How's your elbow? You know, it's better.
I was just telling Dr.
Saperstein.
I'm not pain free, but my range of motion's much improved.
I slept almost all night.
The prednisone finally kicked in.
I don't know.
Things only eased up after I changed my visualization techniques.
- Based on what Ed said.
- What Ed said? Mm-hmm.
About the coffee? What coffee? "Umpak" or somethin'.
- Coffee Pot Mountain.
- Sorta.
Common sports methodology- You visualize your goals.
I have a chance at a personal best in this race.
That's that I tried focusing on.
We'll see what happens.
Well, good.
A lot like, um, those motivational techniques they use in golf.
Inner golf.
I guess that can work, but as far as effecting a big reversal of any kind- Inner golf.
So you tell yourself a healing golf story? No, no.
That's the point.
It's not about healing.
It's about putting.
Go! Go! Go! Whoo! Whoo! Mmm.
Good.
It's the Colonel.
I'm, uh- I'm sorry how I've been, you know, wrecking our anniversary and everything.
Mmm, that's okay.
You know, workin' for Lester- Man, it hasn't been good for my frame of mind.
I know.
You know what's funny.
He depresses me.
You know, the guy has all that money and all that beautiful land, and the guy depresses you.
He's sad.
Sad? Mmm.
Homesick.
He's lost touch with the old ways.
Chief Seattle said, "How can you sell the air?" Lester can't really own the land.
Seattle said, "Our dead never forget the beautiful world that gave them being.
"They still love its winding rivers, "its great mountains and sequestered vales.
"And they watch, in the tenderest affection, "over the lonely hearted living and often return to visit and comfort them.
"
Chris here with a trackside update.
Eight days and counting till Sunday's starting pistola in a grueling contest of man and machine versus Mr.
Clock in what promises to be the der Nüburgring of wheelchair racing.
I've already seen some tour busses coming in- people wantin'to see these superb athletes.
Got the winner of this year's Boston marathon here, the winner of the Atlanta Peachtree.
And we've got some losers here, too, people.
But that's what makes a horse race.
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
All righty.
Hi.
Sorry I'm late.
I'm starved.
Special's rabbit cacciatore.
Lester Haynes is building a new house.
I know.
With an indoor pool.
That's just to start.
He's building "Concert hall quality" stereo system throughout.
And guess who's going to wire it up? Neil Nasmith? Wrong.
He fired Neil.
I was just there.
Lester wants me to do it.
That's good.
This is the biggest job I ever had.
For the first time, I'm the man with the plan.
It's nice.
It's financial security.
Yeah, makes you want to think about the future.
You know, I could get a new place.
I mean, a bigger place.
So, uh, what brings you to Cicely? Um, the marathon.
Right.
Uh, sorry.
I'm just a little preoccupied right now.
Yeah, well, uh, I've got the best training program I've ever had, Ed.
And finally I've got a racing chair that I have confidence in.
But I came down with this stupid tennis elbow.
Bad timing.
Yeah.
Maurice's new race doctor put her on, uh, corticosteroids.
Uh, and Naprosyn- the same things I was given at the sports medicine institute in Seattle.
But the meds never cut it.
If this elbow costs me a few hundredths of a second, I'm sitting there with bronze or silver around my neck.
And I'm not really into base metals.
Wow.
Ed, hey, is there anything you can do? Listen, I'm a firm believer in alternative medicine.
No, it's not that.
It's just- Well, see, the whole " shamaneering" thing- I don't think it's something I can get into right now.
See, I've got this script- the shaman low-budget picture thing I've been trying to set up for about six months now.
And, well, turns out the new Steven Seagal picture, On Deadly Ground- It has some of the same action beats in it.
I just got my fourth rejection.
As you can see, I got a lot of work to do.
Wait a minute.
What about a poultice? Like Leonard always talks about.
I- I don't know.
Maybe mugwort in a topical application.
We want to thank The Brick for providing this tasty meal.
It is with a sense of great pride and humility that we welcome these superb athletes from all over the face of the globe.
Names such as France's Marc Pettier and our two-time national champion- Cliff Zweibel.
In order to pamper these dynamos while our own Joel Fleischman is, uh, north of the 60, I have brought in Grant Saperstein, M.
D.
, F.
A.
C.
S.
, from L.
A.
Now, many of my friends and acquaintances have come to me and asked, "Maurice Minnifield, why are you an advocate for wheelchair athletics?" As some of you know, I had an accident a few months ago that landed me in a wheelchair.
I learned firsthand the stupidity and inconvenience of having inaccessible business establishments and thoroughfares.
It seems like your range of motion is maybe a little better.
But the smell just gets worse.
Oh.
Uh- That-That's the gray fox doody.
What? Well,just a smidgen, kind of as an emulsifier.
you people- with your grit, determination and skill- will do for Cicely.
To the athletes.
Hey, Lester.
Who'd you have to bribe to get this past the plan check? Oh, Maurice.
To what do I owe the honor? Oh, you don't owe an honor.
You owe the bank.
Well, not exactly, Maurice.
Not exactly.
What, you going out of pocket on this thing? Well, right now, I'm going out of my mind.
Building and Safety- If these guys had a nickel for every nit they pick, heck, they could afford a place just like this.
I see you favor a small master.
Oh, no.
The master's back there.
This is the observatory.
That's how come there's no roof members.
It's gonna have all-steel framing here 'cause the ceiling's gonna slide away.
I've got a couple hundred pounds of Zeiss glass gonna sit right here.
Really? Can you imagine the power this place is gonna pull? And here's the guy who's making it all possible for me.
Ted.
Hey, Maurice.
I was dyin' before Mr.
Banks came around.
This guy is putting in a reverse synchro something- Well, you tell him, Ted.
It's a reverse synchrons generator.
Improves power from 0.
8 to 1.
0.
And I'm gonna be completely independent of government utilities.
Damn.
Hey, what's up, Ed? Hey, Sam.
I don't wanna talk to a paralegal.
I wanna talk to the lawyer himself.
Uh, all right.
I gotta go.
I gotta go.
Ed? Ed Chigliak? Dr.
Saperstein.
Ed, wait up a second.
There's something I gotta ask you.
Uh- Did you prescribe a mugwort poultice for Kim Greer? That's right.
Listen, I have a great respect for, uh, non-Western, indigenous medicines.
Tao, chakras- all that stuff.
And listen, this masseuse at Bally's gave me an acupressure massage- really relieved my sciatica.
Huh.
Neat.
Well, neat, yes.
But my point is, you really can't interfere with a course of treatment I've undertaken with a patient, right? Well, isn't everybody entitled to a second opinion? Absolutely.
Second, third, if there's the slightest doubt about a diagnosis.
Unfortunately, that's not the case with Kim's medial epicondylitis.
Which is what tennis elbow is.
Ah.
Tennis elbow does not respond to mugwort.
To be honest with you, Ed, I don't know that the heck mugwort is.
Anyway, the patient's point tenderness distal to the epicondyle shows some relief with the one-percent lidocaine.
Which coincidentally proves my differential diagnosis.
Yeah, but, uh, the pain keeps coming back.
So far.
But things aren't helped by a topical ointment, which has caused a secondary dermatitis running clear up the arm.
Uh, that's a rash.
Let's cut to the chase.
Ed, are you covered by malpractice insurance? No.
Uh, didn't think I needed it.
Hmm.
Well, Kim came to me, and- Patients turn on you, Ed.
Like that.
Yesterday's savior is tomorrow's Mengele.
I know whereof I speak.
Why do you think I'm in Alaska as race physician? I was partner in one of the top plastic surgery and maxillofacial practices on the West Side of Los Angeles.
I lost it- everything.
Boom.
That's all they left me.
Wow.
And was it my fault? I told her repeatedly- " Wear a hat.
" Damn.
We just can't seem to get past that brick wall at 24.
31.
I thought you guys had the chair that finally eliminated frame flex.
You mean that was flexing on you? Yeah.
What the hell is happening here? I don't know.
Hop out.
Let me take a look.
Tubular chrome-moly fork, leveraged steering, custom aluminum " V" cage design.
Carbon-fiber wheels.
I wonder if I made a wrong turn here.
Well, if it is a mistake, it's Mike's.
He invented the Minnifield ZX1000.
Yeah, and I invested in it.
It seemed like such a no-brain idea back in rehab.
I mean, there's so many spinal cord injuries surviving these days that, uh wheelchair athletics is a growth industry.
I mean, it's not the microchip, but we can expand.
We could manufacture skis for able-bodied people.
Or mountain bikes.
What? Does your enthusiasm for wheelchair sports have even the teensiest bit to do with that article in Alaska Business that said Minnifield Communications had bailed out on its employee health plan? Listen, Cliff.
I've been wantin' to talk to you.
That bandana- Do you intend to wear that in the race? It's better than a sunburned forehead.
It doesn't present the proper image for Team Minnifield.
You look more like Long John Silver than a wholesome athlete.
Well, he was a crip.
You listen.
When George Steinbrenner sends his team out on the field, nobody's wearing a bandana.
Nobody's wearing a bowler.
Nobody's wearing a do-rag.
They are all wearing the official New York Yankees baseball cap.
Do you understand that? You.
Edski! What up? - What are you doing here? - I hope you don't mind.
Your heater vent was open, so I came in.
Hey, you know, that Bettie Serveert is dope! You want a sandwich? I suppose it'd be too much trouble for you to shut my fridge.
Hey.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I just thought maybe you'd like to join me in a little celebration here.
It's a red-letter day for me.
Why? Why? Because you're not gonna cure that girl's elbow.
How do you know about her? The poultice didn't work, and neither did the healing stories.
I mean, that- that was laughable.
What do you want from me? Ed.
Nothing's gonna work, Ed.
And you wanna know why? No.
Let me tell you.
Well, first of all, you're a terrible shaman.
That's why.
And " B," your patient has to win at all costs.
You see, Ed, you're dealing with the demon of external validation.
And I'm here to tell ya, doc, you can't beat external validation.
You want to know why? It's because it feels so good.
You're trying to get me to not help Kim.
I care bubkes about Kim, Ed.
I'm your demon- low self-esteem.
You're just making it worse for her, Ed.
Every time you go at her with a poultice, you feed her need to be admired from without.
You reinforce her wish to compulsively compete while simultaneously undermining her confidence.
Get out.
Oh.
Okay.
This is me leavin'.
You can shout at me all you want, Ed.
But External Validation- He's gonna grind you up like a bug.
He eats guys like you with low self-esteem as tapas.
Tapas.
It's open.
Hey.
Maggie's not here.
Oh, that's okay.
Actually, I just came by to see how you were doin'.
I'm now six seconds behind my time, my arm feels like it's on fire, and Heidi Beck had her fastest practice run ever yesterday.
There's some good news though.
Could you get me that envelope right there? Oh, you read it.
All right.
Uh.
"Dear Kim Greer, this is to tell you that you have been named Athlete of the Year"- Hey.
" by Miss Andrews's third-grade class.
Rudy Perpich Elementary School, Blooming Prairie, Minnesota.
" Isn't that sweet? They read about me in Sports 'N Spokes.
I don't know how they knew I was here.
External validation.
A little of that never hurts, huh? No, I mean, that's the problem, Kim.
What's the problem? You want to win.
Yeah.
So? See, that's all you're thinking about- is winning.
You're confirming your sense of self-worth through outward reward instead of through inner appreciation.
Ed, you sound like a daytime talk show.
No, I tell you, Kim.
That is your demon- external validation.
Mine is low self-esteem.
So who am I to be telling you what to do? I should probably just shout my mouth.
Huh? Thing is, Kim, maybe you should just lay off the arm for a while, not even run this race.
Ed, that's nuts.
Come on.
Besides, I could never drop out now, disappoint kids like those.
There are so few role models around.
Oh, boy.
What? See, Kim, even if your arm gets better and even if you win, it's never gonna be enough.
You're always gonna get hung up on that next trophy or plaque.
You're never gonna get enough validation.
And you're never gonna feel like a winner even if you win.
Ed, there is nothing wrong with wanting to win.
It's what drives an athlete- the competitive spirit, the need to be number one.
That's a healthy instinct.
All right.
Catch you later.
Ted, how are you doin' today? Haulin' butt, boss.
Great.
Listen, Roman had a notion on the indoor pool.
Oh, yeah? Yeah.
We, uh, flop the changing room with theJacuzzi.
Flop them? Yeah.
He smartly pointed out nobody noticed that theJacuzzi room is twice as big as the changing room.
Then I thought, " What the heck?" The changing room has the better view, which it doesn't need.
Well, I already wired the rooms according to plan.
I put the breaker in just yesterday.
So my family and I- We're in theJacuzzi and we're lookin' at the back of the garage.
Great.
Well, I could rip it all out and rewire.
Well, you know, blueprints are just that.
Yeah.
Listen, why don't, uh, you come up to the old place tonight? A few of my friends- evenings, we get together in my den.
Houseboy makes Filipino barbecue, and we talk hunting and watch the Sonics.
Wow.
That'd be great.
Well, you don't have plans, do you? Well, no, not really.
Good.
I'll see you there.
Hi.
Come in.
What's the matter? I can't have dinner.
How come? Lester wants me to come up to his current house and go over some stuff or something.
I made Cornish hens.
What can I do? He wants you to work at night too? Meet some people or somethin'.
I don't know what his problem is.
I just started workin' for this guy.
What am I supposed to say to him? "I have plans" or " Can we talk about this tomorrow?" Do you think I want to sit around with a bunch of guys eating Filipino food- whatever the heck that is- and B.
S.
'ing about the building trades when I can be here having a nice dinner, playing Pictionary later? Oh, boy.
This is just what I needed today.
See, look.
Right here.
Look at your body position.
Mike'll tell you you got to tuck in.
I think, Maurice, he was deliberately easing up.
Hmm.
I knew there wasn't anybody on me.
What's happenin' here, guy? How come you're not drafting Pettier, number 27? I couldn't get him in front of me, so I decided to forget strategy and just hammer.
Mmm.
Excuse me, Maurice, but what's the sum total of your wheelchair-pushing experience- from the nurses' station to the head? And you're gonna tell me how to win races? Watch the footage, dude.
I'm stronger.
When I take my pulls, Pettier's and Hordyke's stroke rates go right through the roof.
- Yeah, but are you visualizing victory, son? - Maurice, I won the race.
Winning is a given.
You've got a chance here to set a new record for the 26.
2 in the Cicely Sunrise.
That is the kind of aura that the Minnifield ZX needs.
So anyway, Myra and I are going through the museum.
Beautiful tapestries everywhere.
And her feet are killin' her.
Jimmy, turn that down, will you, please? So she goes down, and she sits down on the staircase.
The guard looks over at her, you know, very sternly, down his nose, you know? Madame, ce n'est pas un cinéma.
Yeah.
" This is not a movie theater.
" Now, is that not the French? Madame, ce n'est pas un cinéma.
Well, that's gonna do me.
I have to work in the morning.
Yeah, I'd better bag it too.
You'll ream me if I don't complete that sale for you by tomorrow.
Again.
I'll see ya.
Good night, Ted.
Good night,Julian.
Good night, everybody.
Is this an original Warhol? Hmm? Yeah.
Wow.
A real Warhol.
I had a real good time.
Yeah, it was fun.
Mm-hmm.
I didn't know Filipino people ate okra.
You know, I wonder what it's like to be, you know, really rich.
What do you mean? Well, like, uh, Armand Hammer, you know.
Somebody like that.
Oh, right.
Yeah, to never have to worry about money.
To never have to ask yourself, "Gee, I wonder what this is gonna cost.
" Those people here tonight- Every single one of them is taking a percentage.
I mean, it's draining.
How can I ever expect to accumulate anything? And three and one.
You in the bathrobe- Okay.
And again.
Here we go.
Crank it up.
Burn, baby, burn! Come on now! Whoo! That's fabulous! Well, hello.
Hi.
Oh.
Uh, sorry to disturb you.
I was following a little green man, but I lost him.
He moved his trailer recently.
I don't know which side of the camp.
Are you all right? Mariangela's passed out in the back bedroom again.
She turned my sister's birthday party into a- a twisted simulacrum of a celebration.
Well, I'd better be going.
I've gotta find External Validation.
I provided that for her for the first few years.
Now it's- it's as if- Well, good-bye.
Are you sure you don't wanna come in? I got a pitcher of margaritas.
Nice Beemer.
Hey.
Get away from the car.
External Validation? Yeah.
Here.
Now get out.
Oh, no.
I'm here for Kim Greer.
Oh, yes.
You're Chigliak, aren't you? Low self-esteem.
Ed.
What's your name? Oscar Pulitzer.
Well, I'm here because Kim's my patient.
You have to love and respect her so much, don't you? She's one of my best customers.
I want you to leave her alone.
Her parents were driven.
High achievers, demanding, no introspection.
Kim started chasing me when she was seven, when she took up the clarinet.
We're made for each other.
And what God has brought together, let no shaman put asunder.
All right then.
What's this? You're gonna fight me? For Kim? Yes, I am.
Let's get it on.
Okay, bud.
Ed.
Ed.
Ed.
What's wrong with you, man? Has your brain turned to onion dip? I'm not listening to you.
So you're gonna fight Oscar, huh? He's gonna dance all over your face.
- Tell him what degree black belt you are.
Go on.
Tell him.
- Who can count 'em? I can't back down.
I'm her shaman.
Remember eighth grade? Bob Scaligieri? Huh? One shot to the jewels! You were down, rollin' around.
And all in front of your girlfriend.
Let's go.
The grove? Let's do it.
Brewed up a pot of decaf.
Anybody care for a cup? Great.
What are those? These? My lucky shoes.
You're not gonna wear 'em in the race, are you? Well, yeah.
I'd rethink that if I were you.
What do you mean? Here.
Try these puppies on.
Why? Because I wanna see how they look.
You're wearin' them in the marathon.
Maurice, hello.
I don't even need shoes.
I only wear these 'cause of an old superstition.
I'm certainly not wearing those.
Why the hell not? I'm riding with my lucky shoes, just like I've done in every race since '87.
Mm-mmm.
No, you're not.
I prenegotiated a deal with Reebok.
I can't believe you sold the advertising space on my feet.
What about the back of the chair? You're not gonna leave that blank, are you? BullFrog Sunblock.
Forget it.
You wear 'em if you want.
Look, son, you'd better wake up and smell the Gatorade.
I hate to be the one to break it to you, but sports is business.
And promotion is what stokes the whole machine.
I'm a pragmatist.
I've got an I.
Q.
above room temperature, but I've never seen anybody as anal about this stuff as you are.
I'm in venture capital, and I'm in it to come out on top.
I'm not asking you to wear cigarette signage, but you are riding for Reebok.
Now, I own that chair.
I've been payin' your expenses, and if I want to recoup a little bit, I will recoup.
Ready for lunch? I tried to call you at work, but you left already.
Uh-oh.
I have to stay.
Dr.
Saperstein isn't familiar with the staff.
And he's kind of upset.
Why? Uh, something clawed through the top of his convertible last night.
Well, there goes our six-month anniversary celebration.
Yeah.
Am I late? I'm really sorry.
Mm-mmm.
Good.
One of the sponsors choppered us up to the top of the glacier to the east to do some extreme.
I couldn't pass it up.
Buddies of mine skied glacier at Chamonix.
Eh! Your snow is very wet.
Um, Dr.
Saperstein, this is Ted Banks.
Hey, Ted.
Hi.
So I'll just get changed, and, uh, we'll get to it.
I wanna show you somethin'.
What? - For me? - Of course that's for you.
Wow.
That's nice.
- I almost didn't wanna give it to you.
- Why not? - It's plain.
- Well, it's simple, but it's pretty.
And it's the thought that counts.
- Great.
- Oh, what'd I say? I wanted to get you something nice.
I didn't wanna get you some cheap bracelet and pretend it's the same as diamonds.
It's not the same.
And it's not the thought that counts.
Things count too.
Well, not to me.
I always said to myself that money doesn't matter.
But that's because I know I'm never gonna have it, so I don't let it matter.
But you see nice stuff, and you want it.
Everybody wants it.
I wish you hadn't stopped by.
Ed? Ed? Ed? Ed? Ed.
Are you all right? Ed.
Hey.
Are you okay? Hey, are these your pajamas? We found them in the middle of Main Street.
Mrs.
Grippo ran over them with her truck.
Mrs.
Grippo? Yeah.
Oh.
Can you get up? Can you- Can you get up, Ed? I think you need to see a doctor.
All right? Come on.
Let's just try.
Golly.
You all right? Boy, your electrolyte levels are way down.
You're showing signs of severe dehydration.
Ed? Can you remember what you were doing in the street at night without clothes? I gotta get back and work on my script.
Ed.
Ed.
Where were you? Oh, that's Coffee Pot Mountain- the Inupiaq name.
Without cold-weather gear? Ed, when? For three days and three nights.
Ed, for heaven's sake, you were in the store yesterday.
I was? Uh-huh.
You-Your stack of juice oranges kept collapsing.
Remember? I went out to the crossroads.
This power spot.
Crossroads? What, like in those blues songs? Ed! What are you talking about? Need to get him on a glucose-sodium drip.
I.
V.
? Really? Ed? He'll be okay.
Boy.
Ed.
Oh, there you are.
Hiya, boss.
I'm goin' down to the stables, and I'll be back about 4:00 for a meeting with the borough.
Oh, do you have horses? Yeah, I got a few.
Quarter horses.
I'd like to have more, but it's a sore point with Myra.
She says they're a money pit.
But that's because she doesn't like them.
Mmm.
You know what I think it is? She resents me.
No way.
Yeah.
Listen, does a person get where I'm at by going to endless meetings at their kids' school every night? You married? No.
I have a girlfriend.
Uh-huh, and how does she feel about your career? I mean, does she ever complain because you work too hard? Ever try to make you feel guilty about it? A little, yeah.
Yeah.
"'Twas ever thus.
" Uh, Lester.
Yeah.
Before you go, uh, this is the bill on Mrs.
Haynes's studio.
Wait a minute.
I'm a little confused.
Wh-What's this figure here? Uh, that's the labor.
That's the cost of labor? I'm a little surprised here.
Did you do the work yourself? Well, I kicked down the rough-in to Buddy Talleksen.
And that's the lowest figure you could get out of Buddy? Well, yeah.
But what about your commission? What do you mean? I'm just blue-skying here, but is there some relief there? Relief? You want me to cut my commission? Um, I don't know.
Look, maybe I shouldn't have said that, but I thought we had a bond.
Oh, you-you mean, like, the Native American discount.
Well, yes, if that's how you choose to describe it.
Listen, I work with my people whenever I can.
What about Neil Nasmith? Well, Neil's gone, isn't he? Just like Custer.
Oh.
Well, I'll- I'll work with these numbers.
Okay.
I'll see you later.
Chris in the Mornin' T.
C.
'ing some racing " B" in a flash.
Ruth-Anne Miller still has Sunrise Marathon sweats and T's, plus sun visors.
They're priced to go.
Also for you athletes runnin' the race tomorrow, she's havin' a special on WD-40.
Get this.
Oddsmakers are giving even money on relative newcomer Kim Greer's chances against the one-woman Panzer battalion- Germany's Heidi Beck, in the women's division.
Good luck, ladies.
Let's avoid a pile-up.
This just in.
Spectator parking's now available at Maurice Minnifield's pear orchard.
That's 12 bucks a day for cars, That does not- repeat- not include water hookup.
Ed.
Ed.
Ed? How you doin'? Oh.
Well, Dr.
Saperstein had you on a glucose drip all morning.
He sent you home with these prescription high-nutrient drinks.
Hmm? I'm gonna make you some soup.
Kim- I'm gonna come right to the point here.
Physically, your elbow's not as bad as you think it is.
You're thinking about my elbow still? I tried to fight External Validation for you, Kim.
He's just too tough.
You gotta fight him yourself.
I can't do it for you.
See, Kim, your head is telling you that you've gotta be number one or you have no identity.
But your heart is telling you something completely different, and it's talking to your elbow.
Yeah, but, Ed, she really wants to be number one.
No, Maggie.
It's just that, well, what if she comes in number two? Well, then she's number two.
No, it's not "Well, then she's number two.
" My whole family will be there.
My friends.
Like the clarinet, Kim.
Did I tell you about my clarinet? You quit.
You gave up all that music because your Cousin Gina was the lead singer in a garage band.
And you just knew there was no way you could compete with that.
I put in that call over an hour and a half ago.
Yeah, yeah.
Everything is going along fine.
Then I came down here tonight, and my Romanée-Conti was the temperature of bath water.
You fried the compressor.
Oh, no.
You're kiddin' me.
I don't kid on double time.
No wonder it overheated.
You're supposed to vacuum the coils at least three times a year.
I told Chigliak that.
Yeah, Chigliak.
Hmm.
Well, you're, uh, workin' for Lester Haynes, huh? Yep.
I wonder how much that phantasmagoria out there he's building's worth.
I wonder how much it cost him.
You got any idea? - No.
- Wonder what the overruns are costing.
Brand-new unit.
But you got the house on the hill, so what the hey.
What are you beefin' about? I'm the one payin' for it.
There you go.
Man, you guys.
You wanna know how much he's spendin' up there? I'll tell you- a half a mil on his wife's studio alone.
But he wants me to cut him a discount.
Of course he does.
That's his function in life.
Function.
His function.
Where's the joke? How do you think he amassed all that wealth? - I guess I expected more.
- Well, that was your mistake, wasn't it? I expected taste and class or- or an elevated way of conducting himself.
Like Louis XV orJoe Kennedy Sr.
? Well, no.
Let me tell you something, my friend.
A man named Fitzgerald said it pretty well.
"The rich are different.
They have more money.
" Good night, Ted.
Try not to do any loud hammering.
Can I have your attention, please? We have a lost child- Now, remember.
Tuck in.
You're welcome.
- No.
Tuck.
Tuck.
- Oh.
Yes.
And don't go all out on Heartbreak Hill.
Are you understanding anything I'm saying to you? Well,just do the best you can.
Hey, I read about this kid Soong.
He's fast, but he's raw.
What happened to Zweibel? This guy's better.
If you say so.
He's the new generation.
Besides, Las Vegas is givin' me So no matter how it comes out, I'm a winner, right? Wait a second.
You have money on the other guy the whole time, huh? Downside protection.
Oh, man, you're too much.
Yeah.
Where do I get that action? Ah.
Hey, Ed.
Up and around, huh? Yeah.
I'm not up to writing yet though.
How's your elbow? You know, it's better.
I was just telling Dr.
Saperstein.
I'm not pain free, but my range of motion's much improved.
I slept almost all night.
The prednisone finally kicked in.
I don't know.
Things only eased up after I changed my visualization techniques.
- Based on what Ed said.
- What Ed said? Mm-hmm.
About the coffee? What coffee? "Umpak" or somethin'.
- Coffee Pot Mountain.
- Sorta.
Common sports methodology- You visualize your goals.
I have a chance at a personal best in this race.
That's that I tried focusing on.
We'll see what happens.
Well, good.
A lot like, um, those motivational techniques they use in golf.
Inner golf.
I guess that can work, but as far as effecting a big reversal of any kind- Inner golf.
So you tell yourself a healing golf story? No, no.
That's the point.
It's not about healing.
It's about putting.
Go! Go! Go! Whoo! Whoo! Mmm.
Good.
It's the Colonel.
I'm, uh- I'm sorry how I've been, you know, wrecking our anniversary and everything.
Mmm, that's okay.
You know, workin' for Lester- Man, it hasn't been good for my frame of mind.
I know.
You know what's funny.
He depresses me.
You know, the guy has all that money and all that beautiful land, and the guy depresses you.
He's sad.
Sad? Mmm.
Homesick.
He's lost touch with the old ways.
Chief Seattle said, "How can you sell the air?" Lester can't really own the land.
Seattle said, "Our dead never forget the beautiful world that gave them being.
"They still love its winding rivers, "its great mountains and sequestered vales.
"And they watch, in the tenderest affection, "over the lonely hearted living and often return to visit and comfort them.
"