Regular Show (2010) s05e33 Episode Script
Expert or Liar
Pulling weeds is the worst! Who planted these weeds next to the flowers anyway? Excuse me, young man.
Are you responsible for this beautiful garden? Yeah.
You must know a lot about flowers.
Are you an expert? I'm totally an expert! We got an expert! What the.
?! Yeah, that's right! I'm Bert Coleman, host of TV's hit game show " Expert or Liar"! Each week, I disguise myself and question people on the street .
.
to see who's an expert or liar! I've been waiting for this! Now Rigby, you're claiming to be an expert on flowers, well, we got 10 flower-related questions for you.
Answer each one correctly, and you're an expert, but get just one question wrong and the whole world will know you're a big fat liar! First question! What color are violets? Easy, red! No wait! That is incorrect!! You are a liar! You make me sick! Liar!! Flower expert? More like a big dumb liar no one wants to hang out with! Classic Rigby.
Ah, come on! Stop it! What was I suppose to do? He just showed up and zipped off his face! Got to admit he got you good liar.
I'm not a liar! I may not be an expert on flowers, but I'm an expert at something! Whatever.
I've got to get back on the show, and then you'll see how much of an expert I am! You'll all see!! Dude, you don't have to do this, you know.
I have to! That jerk Bert Coleman made a fool out of me! How are you even gonna find him? He's always in disguise.
Easy! His customs are really lame! I just got to find the weirdest-looked person, put the weirdo face off, then, bang! I go back on TV and prove I'm an expert.
Dude, that's the worst plan ever.
I don't care!! Nobody ever takes me seriously, I'm sick of it! I'm going after Bert Coleman and I'm not coming back until I find him, so don't wait up! Excuse me, sonny.
Could you help me read this map? Maps? Yes, I'm an map expert! Oh, wonderful! I'm also an expert at finding you!!! Bert Coleman!!!!! Bert who? Bert Coleman!!!! Bert Coleman!!!! Bert Coleman!!!!! Bert Coleman!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bert Colemeeeeeen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh no no no!!! These are not optimum chip levels! Mordecai! What did I tell you about hoarding snacks? It wasn't me, it was Rigby! Where is he? He's not here.
He got humiliated on national television for lying, and now he's trying to get back on the show to redeem himself.
You know, typical Rigby.
Benson? Did you say he was humiliated on a TV show? Yeah.
I have to go.
Coleman Bert Coleman.
Benson? Where am I? My apartment.
Here, eat this.
You look terrible.
Why are you being so nice to me? Look, Rigby.
I know you don't always see eye to eye, but we do have one thing in common.
I too was humiliated on national television.
And now, back to Say That Word! Benson, you've made it to the final round.
Say that word, and you will win 100,000 dollars! Woo-hoo! 100,000!! What will you do with that money? Quit my dumb job at the park! You work in a park? Sounds awful! Now, let's see that final word! Alright Benson, say that word! Banana!! Oh, I'm sorry Benson.
The word is " Bandana"! Not quite sure how you missed that one.
I mean there it is Bandana! You just had to say that word.
I thought we screened people to make sure they know how to read.
Noooooooooooooooo! Wow! Brutal! The mockery, the scorn, for years I couldn't leave the house without someone handing me a banana.
I would never wish that kind of pain on anyone.
-Not even you.
-Thanks, Beson.
I just need to get back on that show and prove I'm an expert at something.
Expert, huh, well, I think we both know what you're best at.
Slacking off! -Sandwiches! Wait what? Yah, man, sandwiches.
Meat, bread, condiments, what else do you need to know? All right, let's go with sandwiches.
But how are we gonna find Bert Coleman? Let me handle that.
All right, listen up! Today I have a special test for all of you.
Go to all the sandwich shops in town- Oh yes! -and find Bert Coleman for Rigby.
Aw what! Why should we help that lair? He's the one who got himself into this mess.
That maybe, but think of all the times his lying got you out of messes.
Mordecai, who lied to get you out of doing your chores countless times.
Or when Pops broke that vase, Who lied and told Mr.
Maellard and told him a bird did it.
And Muscle Man, How many times did you get Rigby to lie to Starla, cause you weren't man enough to do it yourself.
Point made, bro.
Actually, my friend Cody is an intern on expert and Lair.
He might be able to tell us where Bert Coleman will be.
Geez Thomas why didn't you say so sooner? -All right then, Rigby and I will talk to this intern, as for the rest of you, Start searching those sandwich shops, or you're all fired!!! Thanks again, Cody.
Anything for Thomas.
Ok, let's see.
Swing dancing, scuba diving, sword fighting Nope, no episodes about sandwiches.
that's kind of your thing, right Rigby? Wait a minute, it says here that Bert Coleman will be at an arcade tomorrow, Of course! Video games! If there's anything I'm a true expert at, is that! Man, who would have thought skipping work to play video games would finally pay off! Ehh yeah, we'll deal with that later.
For now, we gotta get you ready.
It won't be that easy, Expert or Lair doesn't allow repeat guests.
Hmm hmm, I got an idea.
Hey buddy that's a pretty hard score! Are you an expert at video games? Yeah, I'm an expert.
We got an expert! Surprise! I am Bert Coleman and you're on- Expert or lair! Well I've got a surprise for you, Bert Coleman.
We meet again, now put me back on the show, Bert.
We don't do repeat guests! Get out of here lair! No! I'm here to stand up for myself, and everyone else out there who has been humiliated on television! That's right! My name is Joe, and they made a fool out of me on "Pull My Finger"! They got me on that "I Kissed Your Wife"! "Pie In The Face"! And I was humiliated on "Say That World"! "Hey it's banana!" Put him back on the show, Bert.
You want a second chance huh? Well I have something really special for you! It's our season finale and we're broadcasting live! Say hello to the folks at home! He's in for it now! And that's not all, if you lose, we'll rerun this episode everyday as long as the show is on the air.
which will be a long time cause our ratings are really good! So what do you say? Bring on the questions.
To the gaming center! You must answer ten questions about video games, each correct answer will move you ahead on the obstacle course Let the game begin! First question, How much lemonade takes you to the final level of "Lemonade Stand"? I know this.
That is correct! Name the two main characters in "Xtreme Xscape"! Hairowitz! Afrosky! -Correct! The secret move in "Hoop Jams 5000" is Triple double layup combo! Correct! John and John from "Strong Johns"! Correct! The hammer's weakness is furniture! Correct! Left! Right! AB! AB! Start! Correct! The Maximum Gloves! -Correct! Shikara Yamashito! Correct! In "Dig Champs", How fast are the giant slugs? Trick questions! They're giant snails! Correct! Last question, who holds the universe record in the game "Broken Bones"? It-it was Garrett Bobby Ferguson.
Wrong, hahahahahah, lair! I said he was, until the record was broken by Mordecai and Me! And I did it because I'm- an Expert! In your face! He did it he actually did it! Oh good show ahahahahah! Good thing he didn't go with sandwiches am I right guys? Sandwiches, oh no! Where's Muscle Man? Take off the bun, Bert, Take off the Bun!
Are you responsible for this beautiful garden? Yeah.
You must know a lot about flowers.
Are you an expert? I'm totally an expert! We got an expert! What the.
?! Yeah, that's right! I'm Bert Coleman, host of TV's hit game show " Expert or Liar"! Each week, I disguise myself and question people on the street .
.
to see who's an expert or liar! I've been waiting for this! Now Rigby, you're claiming to be an expert on flowers, well, we got 10 flower-related questions for you.
Answer each one correctly, and you're an expert, but get just one question wrong and the whole world will know you're a big fat liar! First question! What color are violets? Easy, red! No wait! That is incorrect!! You are a liar! You make me sick! Liar!! Flower expert? More like a big dumb liar no one wants to hang out with! Classic Rigby.
Ah, come on! Stop it! What was I suppose to do? He just showed up and zipped off his face! Got to admit he got you good liar.
I'm not a liar! I may not be an expert on flowers, but I'm an expert at something! Whatever.
I've got to get back on the show, and then you'll see how much of an expert I am! You'll all see!! Dude, you don't have to do this, you know.
I have to! That jerk Bert Coleman made a fool out of me! How are you even gonna find him? He's always in disguise.
Easy! His customs are really lame! I just got to find the weirdest-looked person, put the weirdo face off, then, bang! I go back on TV and prove I'm an expert.
Dude, that's the worst plan ever.
I don't care!! Nobody ever takes me seriously, I'm sick of it! I'm going after Bert Coleman and I'm not coming back until I find him, so don't wait up! Excuse me, sonny.
Could you help me read this map? Maps? Yes, I'm an map expert! Oh, wonderful! I'm also an expert at finding you!!! Bert Coleman!!!!! Bert who? Bert Coleman!!!! Bert Coleman!!!! Bert Coleman!!!!! Bert Coleman!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bert Colemeeeeeen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh no no no!!! These are not optimum chip levels! Mordecai! What did I tell you about hoarding snacks? It wasn't me, it was Rigby! Where is he? He's not here.
He got humiliated on national television for lying, and now he's trying to get back on the show to redeem himself.
You know, typical Rigby.
Benson? Did you say he was humiliated on a TV show? Yeah.
I have to go.
Coleman Bert Coleman.
Benson? Where am I? My apartment.
Here, eat this.
You look terrible.
Why are you being so nice to me? Look, Rigby.
I know you don't always see eye to eye, but we do have one thing in common.
I too was humiliated on national television.
And now, back to Say That Word! Benson, you've made it to the final round.
Say that word, and you will win 100,000 dollars! Woo-hoo! 100,000!! What will you do with that money? Quit my dumb job at the park! You work in a park? Sounds awful! Now, let's see that final word! Alright Benson, say that word! Banana!! Oh, I'm sorry Benson.
The word is " Bandana"! Not quite sure how you missed that one.
I mean there it is Bandana! You just had to say that word.
I thought we screened people to make sure they know how to read.
Noooooooooooooooo! Wow! Brutal! The mockery, the scorn, for years I couldn't leave the house without someone handing me a banana.
I would never wish that kind of pain on anyone.
-Not even you.
-Thanks, Beson.
I just need to get back on that show and prove I'm an expert at something.
Expert, huh, well, I think we both know what you're best at.
Slacking off! -Sandwiches! Wait what? Yah, man, sandwiches.
Meat, bread, condiments, what else do you need to know? All right, let's go with sandwiches.
But how are we gonna find Bert Coleman? Let me handle that.
All right, listen up! Today I have a special test for all of you.
Go to all the sandwich shops in town- Oh yes! -and find Bert Coleman for Rigby.
Aw what! Why should we help that lair? He's the one who got himself into this mess.
That maybe, but think of all the times his lying got you out of messes.
Mordecai, who lied to get you out of doing your chores countless times.
Or when Pops broke that vase, Who lied and told Mr.
Maellard and told him a bird did it.
And Muscle Man, How many times did you get Rigby to lie to Starla, cause you weren't man enough to do it yourself.
Point made, bro.
Actually, my friend Cody is an intern on expert and Lair.
He might be able to tell us where Bert Coleman will be.
Geez Thomas why didn't you say so sooner? -All right then, Rigby and I will talk to this intern, as for the rest of you, Start searching those sandwich shops, or you're all fired!!! Thanks again, Cody.
Anything for Thomas.
Ok, let's see.
Swing dancing, scuba diving, sword fighting Nope, no episodes about sandwiches.
that's kind of your thing, right Rigby? Wait a minute, it says here that Bert Coleman will be at an arcade tomorrow, Of course! Video games! If there's anything I'm a true expert at, is that! Man, who would have thought skipping work to play video games would finally pay off! Ehh yeah, we'll deal with that later.
For now, we gotta get you ready.
It won't be that easy, Expert or Lair doesn't allow repeat guests.
Hmm hmm, I got an idea.
Hey buddy that's a pretty hard score! Are you an expert at video games? Yeah, I'm an expert.
We got an expert! Surprise! I am Bert Coleman and you're on- Expert or lair! Well I've got a surprise for you, Bert Coleman.
We meet again, now put me back on the show, Bert.
We don't do repeat guests! Get out of here lair! No! I'm here to stand up for myself, and everyone else out there who has been humiliated on television! That's right! My name is Joe, and they made a fool out of me on "Pull My Finger"! They got me on that "I Kissed Your Wife"! "Pie In The Face"! And I was humiliated on "Say That World"! "Hey it's banana!" Put him back on the show, Bert.
You want a second chance huh? Well I have something really special for you! It's our season finale and we're broadcasting live! Say hello to the folks at home! He's in for it now! And that's not all, if you lose, we'll rerun this episode everyday as long as the show is on the air.
which will be a long time cause our ratings are really good! So what do you say? Bring on the questions.
To the gaming center! You must answer ten questions about video games, each correct answer will move you ahead on the obstacle course Let the game begin! First question, How much lemonade takes you to the final level of "Lemonade Stand"? I know this.
That is correct! Name the two main characters in "Xtreme Xscape"! Hairowitz! Afrosky! -Correct! The secret move in "Hoop Jams 5000" is Triple double layup combo! Correct! John and John from "Strong Johns"! Correct! The hammer's weakness is furniture! Correct! Left! Right! AB! AB! Start! Correct! The Maximum Gloves! -Correct! Shikara Yamashito! Correct! In "Dig Champs", How fast are the giant slugs? Trick questions! They're giant snails! Correct! Last question, who holds the universe record in the game "Broken Bones"? It-it was Garrett Bobby Ferguson.
Wrong, hahahahahah, lair! I said he was, until the record was broken by Mordecai and Me! And I did it because I'm- an Expert! In your face! He did it he actually did it! Oh good show ahahahahah! Good thing he didn't go with sandwiches am I right guys? Sandwiches, oh no! Where's Muscle Man? Take off the bun, Bert, Take off the Bun!