Teen Titans Go! (2013) s05e49 Episode Script

Collect Them All

1 [animal sounds.]
[opening theme playing.]
Go! T-E-E-N T-I-T-A-N-S Teen Titans, let's go Teen Titans, go Check out these sweet collectibles! The more I collect, the better I feel.
Each one I get fills me with a false sense of accomplishment.
What is all this junk? These collectibles are very valuable.
This is an investment, Robin.
Collectibles only have value if other people want them.
Once this pointless fad passes, all you'll have left are some lame doodads.
I just don't see the point.
The point is to collect them all.
And I almost have.
I just need one more.
- [dramatic music playing.]
- It's super rare.
You means this one? [all.]
Ooh.
Where did you get that? Down at that spooky store filled with cobwebs and creepy things in jars.
I tells the proprietor I wants that super rare one, - and I don't cares what it costs - [all.]
Ooh.
So he gave me this, but said, if I is not careful, my collection would eventually collect me.
What does that even mean? I think it was a warning on the dangers of obsessive collecting.
I wouldn't be so quick to dismiss the rantings of a creepy shop owner.
- I want it! - I want that thingy! - No, that's mine! - Mine! [beaming.]
Why is it glowing? No clue! But now I want it even more! [all grunting.]
Uh, maybe you guys should drop it.
Titans, you're collectibles! [beaming.]
"Collect them all before I do.
The Toy Master.
" Challenge accepted.
To collect the Titans before the Toy Master, I'll need to do a deep dive into the disgusting world of collectible culture.
- [beeping.]
- Starting here.
A yard sale.
The perfect place to find a one-of-a-kind collectible.
[Cyborg.]
Hey, Robin! Over here.
Don't worry, Cyborg.
I'll have you outta here in no time.
- [exclaims.]
$10? - Yeah, so? Seems like a lot for yard-sale junk.
I'm a collector's item, dude.
My package's in mint condition and everything.
So, your value comes from the fact that your packaging has no flaws? Quality packaging like this is worth more than gold, baby.
I see.
- [grunting.]
- [Cyborg groaning.]
[screaming in pain.]
[clears throat.]
This package is in terrible condition.
And I'll give you 75 cents.
[groans.]
Yes! Ha-ha! I saved you, and a few bucks.
[sobbing.]
Why did you do that? Why? Got to collect them all! [whooshing.]
Maybe the other Titans will be found in this store.
No, man.
You don't find the good collectibles in stores.
That's too easy.
You gotta find them off the beaten path.
Of course.
They'll no doubt be in the clutches of some weirdo who stood in line before the store opened to get his filthy hands on 'em.
And I bet those are the filthy hands we're looking for.
Come on, man, just 'cause a guy looks like an unmarried weirdo with too much disposable income doesn't mean he's a collector.
[whispering.]
Hey, creep.
You collect? Oh, yeah.
Gotta collect them all.
[godly music.]
[both.]
Ooh.
Hello, the friends.
Oh, my gosh, Star, you're so tiny and cute! You are the tiny and the cute also.
[both giggling.]
I'll give you 75 cents for the Starfire.
True collectors don't accept money.
I'll battle you for it.
Music to my ears.
[shouting.]
- [Robin grunting.]
- [man groaning.]
- [bones cracking.]
- [man.]
Oh! Ow! [stammering.]
I meant our collectibles.
They do the battle.
- Seriously? - Oh, yeah.
See, you get these collectibles, and then you make 'em battle each other.
They all got strengths and weaknesses and whatnot.
And the best part is whoever wins gets to keep the loser's collectible.
[scoffs.]
That all sounds very stupid.
But if those are the rules Hello, tiny friend.
I like your little shoesy woozies.
[both giggling.]
[clearing throat.]
Let's get this over with.
[8-bit music.]
Starfire, cat scratch! - [grunting.]
- [cat yowling.]
[groaning.]
Whoa! Cyborg, sonic cannon! Don't got one.
Got a boom box though.
Ooh! And a meatball blaster.
- You should use that one.
- Ah, fine.
Cyborg, meatball blaster! [shouting.]
[Starfire exclaiming.]
Gabaloush! [groans.]
Whoo! All right! Booyah! Too much of the beef that has been ground and mixed with the egg yolk and the bread crumbs.
Ha-ha! Yes! - The spoils of victory! - [groans.]
I'm starting to understand why you guys were so into this.
It feels good to get the collectible I wanted.
But I need more.
I need them all! So far, we hit up a yard sale and some random weirdo on a street.
Where else can we find the collectible? I know just the place.
[dog barking.]
[whispering.]
There! - [Cyborg.]
He is cute as a button.
- [snoring.]
You two will have to sneak in and take Beast Boy away from that sleeping child.
Dude, really? The small human will have much of the sadness upon awakening.
Forget the kid! I have to collect them all! Now get in there! Come on, dude.
We're rescuing you.
No thanks.
I loves it here.
I gets all them good snuggles.
Gots to get in on this.
[Robin.]
Hey! Do not find unconditional love in the arms of that child.
Too late! We're snuggling.
[all sigh.]
Ooh, snuggly, snuggly the snuggle.
[blissful exclaiming.]
[farts, sighs.]
[both laugh.]
[grunts.]
Fine! I'll do it myself.
[alarm blaring.]
[all shrieking.]
[growling.]
[roaring.]
[groaning.]
I have to collect them all.
[wailing.]
[whooshes.]
There's only one place that we haven't tried.
Online shopping.
Ha! There she is! And for only $3.
95.
Unbeatable pricing.
Hoo, doggy! $44 shipping and handling? That is the shameful service charge.
And ordered.
I'll take that.
Thank you very much.
[laughing wickedly.]
Yes! My collection is complete! I Raven, is that you? Yeah, it's me.
Abadath Materdon Jimbos! Uh, something's ain't right, yo.
Look, her eyes are the wrong colors.
That is some poor craftsmanship.
Yo, this ain't Raven! This Bootleg Raven.
I'm a unlicensed knockoff.
Sold for cheap! Zamabam Zip-it-on Zapadoo! [groans.]
Then where's the real Raven? In my collection, you fool.
[announcer.]
The Toy Master.
Behold! My mint, in-box Raven! Hey.
- [all exclaiming.]
- You are the adorable! Thanks.
You guys are cute, too.
It's you.
And I must thank you for collecting the others and bringing them to me.
Soon the Teen Titans will be mine.
And nobody will be left to stop me from collecting the entire world.
- It's not over yet.
- [8-bit music playing.]
I challenge you to a battle, Toy Master.
Very well.
But I must warn you, my collection is quite impressive.
[exclaims.]
The Justice League? We can't beats them fools! They are the most powerful of the collectibles.
We have to try.
Remember, Titans, this is about something greater than ourselves.
My collection! I have to collect them all! - Titans, go! - [shouting.]
Green Lantern! [groaning.]
[gasps.]
[Cyborg screaming.]
Starfire, meow cannon! - [screaming.]
Meow! - [cat meows.]
Wonder Woman, yogurt! I must use the bathroom! Bootleg Raven, dark magic! Abadab Beeferon Binto! [chomping.]
[exclaims awkwardly.]
[exclaims.]
Nice move, Bootleg! Not bad, Robin, but time to end this.
Superman, heat vision! [beaming.]
Face it.
You're defeated, and your collection is mine.
Now you'll have to spend countless hours rebuilding your collection, while making my collection even more valuable by your very desire to own it.
"More valuable"? You know what? Forget it.
[all.]
What? Yeah, I'm not really into this stuff.
You win.
[stammers.]
Don't you want to collect them all? Eh.
Seems like a big waste of time and money.
But I've captured your friends! - Don't care.
- No, you have to care.
Collectibles only have value if other people want them.
Eh.
- [shouting.]
No! - [beaming.]
The curse has been the broken.
- [all cheering.]
- Yes! Thank you, Robin.
Today, we learned from you the importance of not falling prey to the obsessive collecting.
Oh, you're welcome.
I'm just glad to have the team back.
[exclaims awkwardly.]

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