Teen Titans Go! (2013) s05e52 Episode Script
Witches Brew
1 [bird crowing.]
[cat meowing, rat squeaking.]
[elephant trumpeting, lion roaring.]
Go! [opening theme playing.]
T-E-E-N T-I-T-A-N-S Teen Titans, let's go Teen Titans, go! [howling.]
[Cyborg.]
Halloween party at the tower! Whoo-the-hoo! Whoo-hoo! It's gonna be sick! [Raven.]
Eh.
[electronic dance music playing.]
[button beeps.]
Would any of you care to tell me why you're all acting like you're going to a party? Uh, because we're going to a party.
We are not going to a party.
We are hosting a party! And as hosts, it is our job to fret over details no one cares about, until we are sick to our stomachs! So we can'ts have the fun at our own party? Of course not! The party is not for us.
It's for the people we're trying to impress.
- And who's that? - Oh, I don't know, just the Justice League! [all gasp and shudder.]
That's why tonight, everything has to be extra spooky.
[switch clicking.]
If you want spooky, I got spooky.
Do you dare feast upon these Eyeballz and Brainz! [spookily.]
Ooo.
- Nasty! - [gasps.]
The squishiness.
Mmm-mmm-mmm.
You peeled them Eyeballz just like I likes.
[shattering.]
We need real scares, or the Justice League won't stay at our party.
You didn't really expect me to conjure real eyeballs and brains? Of course I did.
And to think I was going to rely on you - to make a real witch's brew.
- [crashing.]
But we gotta have that good witch's brew, bro.
I's disgusted by the idea of a Halloween party with no witch's brew.
Don't worry, I can make it myself.
Robin, you shouldn't be messing with the witch's brew on Halloween.
The forces you may unleash Is that grape soda? Along with a fresh squeeze of lime and the final ingredient [spookily.]
Ooo.
Fizzy water! [all.]
Fizzy water! How is that any different from lame grapes and pasta? Because this is a real witch's brew.
Real witches don't use fizzy water.
Yes, they do.
I got the ingredients from the Internet.
See, bubbles.
That's how you know this is real, mama, look at 'em bubbles.
Clearly, you do not know anything about witches, Raven.
Really? - Behold, the perfect witch's brew! - [crashes.]
[doorbell chimes.]
[chuckles.]
They're here! [elevator dings.]
[dramatic music playing.]
Happy Halloween! [Transylvanian accent.]
Welcome to our spooky party! [coughs.]
[ticking.]
[teeth chatter.]
This is going horribly! We need something to distract them.
- [stammers.]
Cyborg, hit it.
- Hit what? Hit it! - [thuds.]
- You can't just tell somebody to hit it without having worked out what it is beforehand.
I mean, that's nonsense.
Music, hit the music.
Ooh.
- [button clicks.]
- [techno music playing.]
Quick, while they're having fun, let's make sure we have enough potpourri in the bathroom.
[squeaks.]
[both gasp.]
[laughing.]
[brakes screech.]
[bell dings.]
[all laughing.]
[techno music playing.]
[all cackling.]
[toilet flushing.]
Great job, Titans.
We have successfully masked our shame and the shame of those to come.
[crying.]
No, no, no! The Justice League has gone! Oh, it's official, our party was lame.
[distant cackling.]
What? Did you hear that? It sounds like The Justice League's laughing at us for being so lame.
Ah.
Why they gots to rub it in? Actually, it sounds like witches.
[thunder rumbling.]
Have we not established you do not know the thing about the witches? It's obvious we're being mocked from afar.
There's nothing left to do but stew in self-pity.
Or we could just enjoy the party.
I said stew! [all groaning and moaning.]
[alarm blaring.]
Crime alert! Well, Halloween's already been ruined.
We might as well go fight crime.
It looks like the trick or treaters are under attack! [Justice League witches cackling.]
[Robin.]
It's the Justice League.
- [laughs wickedly.]
- [shrieking.]
[Cyborg.]
And they've become witches! What could have turned them into witches? What do you think's turned them into the witches, mama! [mumbles.]
Drinking the witch's brew at the party! The duh.
But that was just grape soda and fizzy water.
Yeah! Witch's brew! Just like it said on the Internet.
So you're saying drinking grape soda made them evil? No.
That made them witches.
Now they're just lashing out because they lack self-esteem.
They can'ts even gets close to the society's impossible high standards of beauty.
I means, check out them hair and nose warts.
[Starfire.]
And the outdated wardrobe.
I mean, I think they look fine, but you know how some people can be so judgmental.
Yes, society is the real villain here.
What are you guys talking about? Witches, Raven! How about you read a book and educate yourself! [cackling.]
We have bigger things to deal with.
[yelping.]
[Cyborg.]
They got the kids! [Starfire.]
We have to find out where they are taking them.
Don't worry.
I know just how to lure them out.
[giggles.]
[child's voice.]
I'm wittle dimples.
I'm just a wittle boy who loves lollipops.
[giggles.]
This is humiliating, bro.
You don't like dwessing up like this? No, man, we don'ts.
We don't likes it at all! Perhaps there is the other plan? [normal voice.]
There is not another plan! If we're going to save the kids, we're gonna have to act like kids.
[child's voice.]
You want to rescue the wittle kiddies, right? [all mumble agreement reluctantly.]
[Beast Boy.]
We gots to.
[normal voice.]
Then get into character! [flatulence.]
I poohed in my pants! [baby voice.]
Where's my lollipop? Popops-a-doops! stinker.
[giggles.]
[normal voice.]
Good.
Now let's get their attention with a little song.
[child's voice.]
On the good ship, wowipop Wow.
[normal voice.]
Sing the song! [all.]
On the good ship, lollipop It's a sweet trip To the candy shop Where bonbons play On the sunny beach Of Peppermint Bay [slurping.]
On the good [all yelping.]
[cackling.]
[laughs, child's voice.]
I told you, our adorable disguises would do the trick.
Stop talking like that.
[clears throat, normal voice.]
Sorry.
[Justice League witches cackling.]
[cackling continues.]
You're still the Justice League, you can't do this! [cackling.]
[all cackling.]
Let's just save these kids.
[all crying.]
So what's the plan? If there's one thing that can take on witch's magic, it's more magic.
[chants a spell.]
[all cackles.]
[brakes screech.]
- [birds chirping.]
- Why didn't it work? Because, as we've been trying to politely tell you all night, you don't know anything about witches.
But you have not received the message.
We's already said theys be angry due to their crushing lack of self-esteem.
So the only way to save those kids is to make the witches feel pretty on the inside.
By making them look the pretty on the outside.
[grunts.]
Light [upbeat music playing.]
Yous gots to pluck them hair and nose warts, yo.
- Pluck, pluck, pluck.
- [grunts.]
[whimpers.]
Try these dope kicks on.
[Superman witch grunts.]
Ooh, and the fashionable headwear.
[grunting.]
[Beast Boy.]
Oh, snaps, you witches be looking good, yo.
[Cyborg.]
Real good! They are brimming with the confidence.
They don't need those kids now that they have something better.
- Self-esteem! - [camera shutter clicking.]
[lock buzzes.]
[kids screaming.]
Huh.
I guess I don't know anything about witches.
- [kids shouting.]
- You sure don't.
[cat meowing, rat squeaking.]
[elephant trumpeting, lion roaring.]
Go! [opening theme playing.]
T-E-E-N T-I-T-A-N-S Teen Titans, let's go Teen Titans, go! [howling.]
[Cyborg.]
Halloween party at the tower! Whoo-the-hoo! Whoo-hoo! It's gonna be sick! [Raven.]
Eh.
[electronic dance music playing.]
[button beeps.]
Would any of you care to tell me why you're all acting like you're going to a party? Uh, because we're going to a party.
We are not going to a party.
We are hosting a party! And as hosts, it is our job to fret over details no one cares about, until we are sick to our stomachs! So we can'ts have the fun at our own party? Of course not! The party is not for us.
It's for the people we're trying to impress.
- And who's that? - Oh, I don't know, just the Justice League! [all gasp and shudder.]
That's why tonight, everything has to be extra spooky.
[switch clicking.]
If you want spooky, I got spooky.
Do you dare feast upon these Eyeballz and Brainz! [spookily.]
Ooo.
- Nasty! - [gasps.]
The squishiness.
Mmm-mmm-mmm.
You peeled them Eyeballz just like I likes.
[shattering.]
We need real scares, or the Justice League won't stay at our party.
You didn't really expect me to conjure real eyeballs and brains? Of course I did.
And to think I was going to rely on you - to make a real witch's brew.
- [crashing.]
But we gotta have that good witch's brew, bro.
I's disgusted by the idea of a Halloween party with no witch's brew.
Don't worry, I can make it myself.
Robin, you shouldn't be messing with the witch's brew on Halloween.
The forces you may unleash Is that grape soda? Along with a fresh squeeze of lime and the final ingredient [spookily.]
Ooo.
Fizzy water! [all.]
Fizzy water! How is that any different from lame grapes and pasta? Because this is a real witch's brew.
Real witches don't use fizzy water.
Yes, they do.
I got the ingredients from the Internet.
See, bubbles.
That's how you know this is real, mama, look at 'em bubbles.
Clearly, you do not know anything about witches, Raven.
Really? - Behold, the perfect witch's brew! - [crashes.]
[doorbell chimes.]
[chuckles.]
They're here! [elevator dings.]
[dramatic music playing.]
Happy Halloween! [Transylvanian accent.]
Welcome to our spooky party! [coughs.]
[ticking.]
[teeth chatter.]
This is going horribly! We need something to distract them.
- [stammers.]
Cyborg, hit it.
- Hit what? Hit it! - [thuds.]
- You can't just tell somebody to hit it without having worked out what it is beforehand.
I mean, that's nonsense.
Music, hit the music.
Ooh.
- [button clicks.]
- [techno music playing.]
Quick, while they're having fun, let's make sure we have enough potpourri in the bathroom.
[squeaks.]
[both gasp.]
[laughing.]
[brakes screech.]
[bell dings.]
[all laughing.]
[techno music playing.]
[all cackling.]
[toilet flushing.]
Great job, Titans.
We have successfully masked our shame and the shame of those to come.
[crying.]
No, no, no! The Justice League has gone! Oh, it's official, our party was lame.
[distant cackling.]
What? Did you hear that? It sounds like The Justice League's laughing at us for being so lame.
Ah.
Why they gots to rub it in? Actually, it sounds like witches.
[thunder rumbling.]
Have we not established you do not know the thing about the witches? It's obvious we're being mocked from afar.
There's nothing left to do but stew in self-pity.
Or we could just enjoy the party.
I said stew! [all groaning and moaning.]
[alarm blaring.]
Crime alert! Well, Halloween's already been ruined.
We might as well go fight crime.
It looks like the trick or treaters are under attack! [Justice League witches cackling.]
[Robin.]
It's the Justice League.
- [laughs wickedly.]
- [shrieking.]
[Cyborg.]
And they've become witches! What could have turned them into witches? What do you think's turned them into the witches, mama! [mumbles.]
Drinking the witch's brew at the party! The duh.
But that was just grape soda and fizzy water.
Yeah! Witch's brew! Just like it said on the Internet.
So you're saying drinking grape soda made them evil? No.
That made them witches.
Now they're just lashing out because they lack self-esteem.
They can'ts even gets close to the society's impossible high standards of beauty.
I means, check out them hair and nose warts.
[Starfire.]
And the outdated wardrobe.
I mean, I think they look fine, but you know how some people can be so judgmental.
Yes, society is the real villain here.
What are you guys talking about? Witches, Raven! How about you read a book and educate yourself! [cackling.]
We have bigger things to deal with.
[yelping.]
[Cyborg.]
They got the kids! [Starfire.]
We have to find out where they are taking them.
Don't worry.
I know just how to lure them out.
[giggles.]
[child's voice.]
I'm wittle dimples.
I'm just a wittle boy who loves lollipops.
[giggles.]
This is humiliating, bro.
You don't like dwessing up like this? No, man, we don'ts.
We don't likes it at all! Perhaps there is the other plan? [normal voice.]
There is not another plan! If we're going to save the kids, we're gonna have to act like kids.
[child's voice.]
You want to rescue the wittle kiddies, right? [all mumble agreement reluctantly.]
[Beast Boy.]
We gots to.
[normal voice.]
Then get into character! [flatulence.]
I poohed in my pants! [baby voice.]
Where's my lollipop? Popops-a-doops! stinker.
[giggles.]
[normal voice.]
Good.
Now let's get their attention with a little song.
[child's voice.]
On the good ship, wowipop Wow.
[normal voice.]
Sing the song! [all.]
On the good ship, lollipop It's a sweet trip To the candy shop Where bonbons play On the sunny beach Of Peppermint Bay [slurping.]
On the good [all yelping.]
[cackling.]
[laughs, child's voice.]
I told you, our adorable disguises would do the trick.
Stop talking like that.
[clears throat, normal voice.]
Sorry.
[Justice League witches cackling.]
[cackling continues.]
You're still the Justice League, you can't do this! [cackling.]
[all cackling.]
Let's just save these kids.
[all crying.]
So what's the plan? If there's one thing that can take on witch's magic, it's more magic.
[chants a spell.]
[all cackles.]
[brakes screech.]
- [birds chirping.]
- Why didn't it work? Because, as we've been trying to politely tell you all night, you don't know anything about witches.
But you have not received the message.
We's already said theys be angry due to their crushing lack of self-esteem.
So the only way to save those kids is to make the witches feel pretty on the inside.
By making them look the pretty on the outside.
[grunts.]
Light [upbeat music playing.]
Yous gots to pluck them hair and nose warts, yo.
- Pluck, pluck, pluck.
- [grunts.]
[whimpers.]
Try these dope kicks on.
[Superman witch grunts.]
Ooh, and the fashionable headwear.
[grunting.]
[Beast Boy.]
Oh, snaps, you witches be looking good, yo.
[Cyborg.]
Real good! They are brimming with the confidence.
They don't need those kids now that they have something better.
- Self-esteem! - [camera shutter clicking.]
[lock buzzes.]
[kids screaming.]
Huh.
I guess I don't know anything about witches.
- [kids shouting.]
- You sure don't.