iCarly s06e02 Episode Script
iGo One Direction
carly, Îλα! ohhh Ohhhhhh Ohhh Ohhhhhh How ya doin'? I'm sick and dying! Oh.
maybe I should take you to a doctor.
nooo.
Just open our door so I can go in there And just be alone.
'kay.
Hey! Hey! Hola.
hey, guys.
hi.
what is going on here?! I'm cookin' steaks.
playin' video games.
I'm in a kiddie pool! gibbehhhh.
How long have you guys been hanging in our apartment?! uh, how long have you guys been on vacation? eight days.
'bout eight days.
ohhhh Ohhhh she okay? no.
She's like dying.
ohhhhhh.
gib, help her up.
kay-kay.
ohhhh Ohhhh man, she looks sicky-sick.
yeah.
She's got jungle worms.
oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my--oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
well, what are jungle worms? they're like these scuzzy little parasites That set up camp in your guts.
ohhhhhh how do you know about jungle worms? my mom got 'em from usin' Some foreign guy's toothbrush.
so what are the symptoms? uhhh Dry mouth I'm so thirsty chills can someone cover me with a blanket? moaning ohhhhh groaning ohhhhh and a lot of, y'know Uh Vomiting.
poor kid.
yeah.
One of us should probably get in there and help her.
hey these steaks are ready.
I want one! carne! mmmm.
Feed me.
in 5, 4, 3, 2 I know,you see.
Somehow the world will change for me and be so wonderful.
Live life,breathe air.
I know somehow we gonna get there And feel so wonderful.
It's all for real.
I'm telling you just how I feel.
So wake up the members of my nation.
It's your time to be.
There's no chance unless you take one.
and the time to see the brighter side of every situation.
Somethings are meant to be.
So give you best and leave the rest to me.
Leave it all to me.
Leave it all to me.
iCarly S06E02 iGo One Direction oh yeah Oh yeah Yes after this will you massage my feet? no, gross.
C'mon, work the heel.
Rub it like a man.
tsk! Tsk! Tsk! so, am I better? Are my jungle worms gone? yeah, I'd say You're pretty much over it.
But you still could be contagious, So don't go kissing any boys.
yeah, no problem -- I don't have a boyfriend.
I didn't think so.
Well, I'll be in my apartment upstairs If you need anything else.
hey, doc I got this weird-lookin' bump growin' outta my neck.
that's your head.
no, I meant a bump That could be a problem If it's not oh, hey, guys -- Guess what I got! a woman? a real job? a friend your own age? no! Shhheck it out I just found this at the junkyard! Amongst the junk! what is that -- a motorcycle? mm-hmm.
A motorcy What about this looks like a motorcycle?! do you see wheels? a motor? anything motorcycle related? look.
I'm just a kid -- I'm not a "Wizard".
get in between the toes.
oh.
Is that some kind of exercise machine? uh, thee best exercise machine ever made! It's called the omni-flex.
what are you gonna do with it? fix it up and use it.
like, to get in shape? I'm already "In shape.
" yeah, the shape of a tall marshmallow.
uhhh Look at these toned abs.
what's that In your belly button? there's nothing in my-- Whoa, popcorn.
okay, fellow icarly people.
Check out the email I just got from the manager Of a certain british band known as one direction.
shut up.
one direction?! oh my god, oh my god, Oh my god read the email! he says "Dear freddie.
" oh my god! "In response to your email, "My clients, one direction, "Will be in the seattle area later this week" no way, real life?! ssh.
Let him finish!!! "And they would love "To appear on icarly And perform a song.
" sounds good.
t-bo! You cannot borrow my deodorant.
Just-- Hello lady.
hi.
Are you, um Spencer spay? shay.
is that fudge on your face? no, no.
Yes.
Uh, who are you? justine.
I think they left this at my door by mistake.
oh Well thanks.
no way, is that an omni-flex? yeah! You wanna come in And look at it?! sure! Oh my gosh, I used to work out on one of these.
really? 'cuz, uh Y'know, I'm a personal exercise trainer.
yeah? You lookin' for new people to exercise? yes.
cool.
Could you do a workout tomorrow, 'round seven pm? seven is perfect.
'kay.
Well, bye.
no-ho-ho Bye to you.
Okay.
I love what you've done for me.
hey.
hey.
sam here yet? no, she texted me from jail And said she'd be a few minutes late.
sam's in jail?! nah, she was just visiting her cousin, tanya.
Uh, nice water bottle holder.
don't make fun of it.
Spencer got this for me In texas.
See all the little handguns? oh, yeah.
You gotta love texas.
noooooo!!!! you can't drink after me! I could still be contagious with jungle worms! oh right.
'sup m'peeps? whoa gib.
holy what? are you all dressed up like that 'cuz one direction's Coming here? noooo.
Is that today? Nooooo.
What? you guys, one direction Are on their way up! oh my god oh my god Oh my god oh my god oh my god! how was that? fan-tastic! Gorgeous! so, what time do we do the show tonight? we start at seven thirty, So probably get here twenty minutes early.
okay, cool.
hey guys, Quick announcement I am not currently dating anyone.
Just puttin' that out there.
and I give good foot massages.
Just puttin' that out there.
yeah, I'm not puttin' anything out there.
Anyway We made you guys Some british sandwiches, If you're hungry.
what are "British sandwiches"? oh, y'know, They're sandwiches that are They have um They're just normal sandwiches.
so who's hungry? yeah.
me too.
okay, we'll bring 'em up.
cool.
freddie, gibby, come help us.
'kay.
sure.
something we can do for you? uh, would you guys autograph My Sister's scrapbook? yeah.
Sure.
cool.
Just sign it by your pic.
yeah.
Sure -- What's your sister's name? uhhh My sister's name is, Uh Gib-- G Girlby.
girlby? that's a name? yeah.
It's a really popular girls' name here in america.
You wouldn't know that.
is there any water around here? over there.
ah.
Handguns! oh hey sam.
one direction here yet? yeah, they're upstairs Gettin' ready to do the show.
mmm.
Awomome.
Ahh.
Why are you dressed Like a rapper That never sold any records? I tricked this really hot lady Into thinking I'm a personal exercise trainer, And she'll be here any minute-- You're not a good listener! And hel well? You just gonna stand there and look all stupid? who are you? bethany.
yeah, uh, look kid, I don't wanna buy any of your church candy, Or whatever you're selling.
I got a really hot lady coming here-- are you an exercise trainer Or not? exercise trainer? I smell fudge.
ah, hey Kid What are you doing? smelling this fudge.
well get out.
my mother said you were gonna exercise me.
no, I'm supposed-- Your mother? I thought she wanted to work out.
well ya thought wrong, moron.
hey! I'm an adult.
You do not call adults "Morons".
pbbbbbbfffffffffttttt! no.
Whija--?!?! Oh.
ohhh.
can he stand?! here, let's try ohhh.
whoa, he's really sick.
oh no! This is horrible! how'd he get so sick so fast? ohhh I feel cold And thirsty.
Will somebody hold me? no.
here Have some more of this water.
whoa what?! What? What?! Harry You drank from my water bottle?! yeah.
oh my god.
I gave harry styles jungle worms! nooooo! Ahhh gaaaahhhh, Nooooo!!! I'm so sad.
I'm so sad.
Oh! is he better? I think so.
Or maybe not.
How long has he been lying here sick? almost a week.
I don't get it -- Carly had jungle worms -- She felt better after two days.
well, sickness is Y'know, it's just Other times There it is.
wow.
Good to know.
we're so lucky To have a doctor right here In the building.
yes.
Well, if I can be Of any more help you helped nothing! y girls have A couple hundred bucks You can float me 'til the weekend? get out! leave! C'mon, we gotta roll.
'kay.
Oh, uh, harry, You need anything before I go? oh, no.
Wait Could I have some more fruits? fruit, sure.
and And could you cut them Into the little cubes, The way that you do? 'course.
I'll be right back with it.
and Could you put Warm socks on my feet? sure.
I'll heat up a pair In the dryer.
what else ya want carly To do for ya -- Wash your tour bus? sam how 'bout twenty bucks? no! beat it, clown! One and two and good, Tell your mom to call me And good and pull and-- I wanna stop! why?! cuz I've already been doin' this for forty-five seconds! Where's the dang fudge?! no more fudge! I hate you! Awww, kid Bethany What's wrong? Wow, you're already sweating.
no one likes me -- 'cuz I'm awkward.
you're not awkward.
I'm not? you just have a terrible, Terrible personality.
You're so mean.
And look at your shirt What is that stain? mucus.
okay, well some people don't wanna be friends With girls Who have mucus all over them.
I need a make-over.
well Yeaaahh.
But you also need to be nicer To people.
And snot less on yourself.
I wanna make-over!!! all right!!! And if harry's not better By Friday, We'll have to cancel our shows In san francisco.
san francisco! Mah town! Wooo! I've never been there.
well I feel awful.
I don't know Why he's not getting better.
oh carly Oh, sweet, innocent, Stupid little carly.
why am I stupid? harry Doesn't wanna get better -- 'cuz you make him Breakfast in bed, And you warm his socks, And read him stories And brush his hair And, you know, you're not ugly.
what do you think, hot pants? well, if you were treating me Like you've been treating harry, I sure wouldn't wanna leave.
you think harry's faking? not faking.
I'm sure he was sick.
I just think, Now, he's havin' a good time At "Hotel carlyfornia.
" you did not just say that.
I said it And I'm proud of it.
oh.
Uh.
okay, so what are we gonna do about this? uh, I know What might motivate harry To get outta bed And back on stage.
you think I should work him over With the butter sock? y'know, I really Really don't.
did she say 'butter sock'? is that a sock? full of butter? do you guys wanna hear my idea? yes.
does it involve the butter sock? no! Look, I was just thinking Harry might suddenly feel better If he thought He was gonna be replaced In one direction.
whoa, wait -- replace harry? not for real.
We just make him think he's being replaced.
who with? Baby, you light up my world Like nobody else The way that you flip Your hair Gets me overwhelmed But when you smile At the ground It ain't hard to tell stop it!!! Oh, oh You don't know You're beautiful nooooo! what? please get rid of him.
I'm feeling better.
you really think You can perform? yes! What time's icarly? 'bout an hour.
you're not even wearing A watch.
well I'll be ready! Just please Don't let him sing or dance, Ever again.
yeah.
whoa! well that worked.
it really worked! it worked great.
wait What worked? and Done.
Make-over complete.
I wanna see, I wanna see!!! okay.
oh my god! I look awful! noooo, you look great! you made me look worse Than I did when I got here! but I-- moron! bethany wait! Bethany c'mon, come back! Our story can't just end Like this! We need some kind of resolution! okay icarly fans 'tiz the moment Ya been waitin' for.
five super-cool guys All without jungle worms.
we give you The fantaztical Boybandable One Direction One Direction - What makes you beautiful You're insecure Don't know what for You're turning heads When you walk Through the door Don't need makeup To cover up Being the way that you are Is enough Everyone else in the room Can see it Everyone else but you Baby, you light up my world Like nobody else The way that you flip Your hair Gets me overwhelmed But when you smile At the ground It ain't hard to tell You don't know Oh oh You don't know You're beautiful If only you saw What I can see You'd understand Why I want you so desperately Right now I'm looking at you And I can't believe You don't know Oh oh You don't know You're beautiful Oh, oh, oh That's what makes you Beautiful So girl, come on You got it wrong To prove I'm right I put it in a song I don't know why You're being shy And turn away when I look Into your eyes Everyone else in the room can see it.
Everyone else but you Baby, you light up my world like nobody else The way that you flip your head Gets me overwhelmed But when you smile at the ground It ain't hard to tell You don't know Oh oh You don't know beautiful If only you saw what I can see You'd understand Why I want you so desperately Right now I'm looking at you And I can't believe You don't know Oh oh You don't know you're beautiful Oh, oh, oh That's what makes you beautiful
maybe I should take you to a doctor.
nooo.
Just open our door so I can go in there And just be alone.
'kay.
Hey! Hey! Hola.
hey, guys.
hi.
what is going on here?! I'm cookin' steaks.
playin' video games.
I'm in a kiddie pool! gibbehhhh.
How long have you guys been hanging in our apartment?! uh, how long have you guys been on vacation? eight days.
'bout eight days.
ohhhh Ohhhh she okay? no.
She's like dying.
ohhhhhh.
gib, help her up.
kay-kay.
ohhhh Ohhhh man, she looks sicky-sick.
yeah.
She's got jungle worms.
oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my--oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
well, what are jungle worms? they're like these scuzzy little parasites That set up camp in your guts.
ohhhhhh how do you know about jungle worms? my mom got 'em from usin' Some foreign guy's toothbrush.
so what are the symptoms? uhhh Dry mouth I'm so thirsty chills can someone cover me with a blanket? moaning ohhhhh groaning ohhhhh and a lot of, y'know Uh Vomiting.
poor kid.
yeah.
One of us should probably get in there and help her.
hey these steaks are ready.
I want one! carne! mmmm.
Feed me.
in 5, 4, 3, 2 I know,you see.
Somehow the world will change for me and be so wonderful.
Live life,breathe air.
I know somehow we gonna get there And feel so wonderful.
It's all for real.
I'm telling you just how I feel.
So wake up the members of my nation.
It's your time to be.
There's no chance unless you take one.
and the time to see the brighter side of every situation.
Somethings are meant to be.
So give you best and leave the rest to me.
Leave it all to me.
Leave it all to me.
iCarly S06E02 iGo One Direction oh yeah Oh yeah Yes after this will you massage my feet? no, gross.
C'mon, work the heel.
Rub it like a man.
tsk! Tsk! Tsk! so, am I better? Are my jungle worms gone? yeah, I'd say You're pretty much over it.
But you still could be contagious, So don't go kissing any boys.
yeah, no problem -- I don't have a boyfriend.
I didn't think so.
Well, I'll be in my apartment upstairs If you need anything else.
hey, doc I got this weird-lookin' bump growin' outta my neck.
that's your head.
no, I meant a bump That could be a problem If it's not oh, hey, guys -- Guess what I got! a woman? a real job? a friend your own age? no! Shhheck it out I just found this at the junkyard! Amongst the junk! what is that -- a motorcycle? mm-hmm.
A motorcy What about this looks like a motorcycle?! do you see wheels? a motor? anything motorcycle related? look.
I'm just a kid -- I'm not a "Wizard".
get in between the toes.
oh.
Is that some kind of exercise machine? uh, thee best exercise machine ever made! It's called the omni-flex.
what are you gonna do with it? fix it up and use it.
like, to get in shape? I'm already "In shape.
" yeah, the shape of a tall marshmallow.
uhhh Look at these toned abs.
what's that In your belly button? there's nothing in my-- Whoa, popcorn.
okay, fellow icarly people.
Check out the email I just got from the manager Of a certain british band known as one direction.
shut up.
one direction?! oh my god, oh my god, Oh my god read the email! he says "Dear freddie.
" oh my god! "In response to your email, "My clients, one direction, "Will be in the seattle area later this week" no way, real life?! ssh.
Let him finish!!! "And they would love "To appear on icarly And perform a song.
" sounds good.
t-bo! You cannot borrow my deodorant.
Just-- Hello lady.
hi.
Are you, um Spencer spay? shay.
is that fudge on your face? no, no.
Yes.
Uh, who are you? justine.
I think they left this at my door by mistake.
oh Well thanks.
no way, is that an omni-flex? yeah! You wanna come in And look at it?! sure! Oh my gosh, I used to work out on one of these.
really? 'cuz, uh Y'know, I'm a personal exercise trainer.
yeah? You lookin' for new people to exercise? yes.
cool.
Could you do a workout tomorrow, 'round seven pm? seven is perfect.
'kay.
Well, bye.
no-ho-ho Bye to you.
Okay.
I love what you've done for me.
hey.
hey.
sam here yet? no, she texted me from jail And said she'd be a few minutes late.
sam's in jail?! nah, she was just visiting her cousin, tanya.
Uh, nice water bottle holder.
don't make fun of it.
Spencer got this for me In texas.
See all the little handguns? oh, yeah.
You gotta love texas.
noooooo!!!! you can't drink after me! I could still be contagious with jungle worms! oh right.
'sup m'peeps? whoa gib.
holy what? are you all dressed up like that 'cuz one direction's Coming here? noooo.
Is that today? Nooooo.
What? you guys, one direction Are on their way up! oh my god oh my god Oh my god oh my god oh my god! how was that? fan-tastic! Gorgeous! so, what time do we do the show tonight? we start at seven thirty, So probably get here twenty minutes early.
okay, cool.
hey guys, Quick announcement I am not currently dating anyone.
Just puttin' that out there.
and I give good foot massages.
Just puttin' that out there.
yeah, I'm not puttin' anything out there.
Anyway We made you guys Some british sandwiches, If you're hungry.
what are "British sandwiches"? oh, y'know, They're sandwiches that are They have um They're just normal sandwiches.
so who's hungry? yeah.
me too.
okay, we'll bring 'em up.
cool.
freddie, gibby, come help us.
'kay.
sure.
something we can do for you? uh, would you guys autograph My Sister's scrapbook? yeah.
Sure.
cool.
Just sign it by your pic.
yeah.
Sure -- What's your sister's name? uhhh My sister's name is, Uh Gib-- G Girlby.
girlby? that's a name? yeah.
It's a really popular girls' name here in america.
You wouldn't know that.
is there any water around here? over there.
ah.
Handguns! oh hey sam.
one direction here yet? yeah, they're upstairs Gettin' ready to do the show.
mmm.
Awomome.
Ahh.
Why are you dressed Like a rapper That never sold any records? I tricked this really hot lady Into thinking I'm a personal exercise trainer, And she'll be here any minute-- You're not a good listener! And hel well? You just gonna stand there and look all stupid? who are you? bethany.
yeah, uh, look kid, I don't wanna buy any of your church candy, Or whatever you're selling.
I got a really hot lady coming here-- are you an exercise trainer Or not? exercise trainer? I smell fudge.
ah, hey Kid What are you doing? smelling this fudge.
well get out.
my mother said you were gonna exercise me.
no, I'm supposed-- Your mother? I thought she wanted to work out.
well ya thought wrong, moron.
hey! I'm an adult.
You do not call adults "Morons".
pbbbbbbfffffffffttttt! no.
Whija--?!?! Oh.
ohhh.
can he stand?! here, let's try ohhh.
whoa, he's really sick.
oh no! This is horrible! how'd he get so sick so fast? ohhh I feel cold And thirsty.
Will somebody hold me? no.
here Have some more of this water.
whoa what?! What? What?! Harry You drank from my water bottle?! yeah.
oh my god.
I gave harry styles jungle worms! nooooo! Ahhh gaaaahhhh, Nooooo!!! I'm so sad.
I'm so sad.
Oh! is he better? I think so.
Or maybe not.
How long has he been lying here sick? almost a week.
I don't get it -- Carly had jungle worms -- She felt better after two days.
well, sickness is Y'know, it's just Other times There it is.
wow.
Good to know.
we're so lucky To have a doctor right here In the building.
yes.
Well, if I can be Of any more help you helped nothing! y girls have A couple hundred bucks You can float me 'til the weekend? get out! leave! C'mon, we gotta roll.
'kay.
Oh, uh, harry, You need anything before I go? oh, no.
Wait Could I have some more fruits? fruit, sure.
and And could you cut them Into the little cubes, The way that you do? 'course.
I'll be right back with it.
and Could you put Warm socks on my feet? sure.
I'll heat up a pair In the dryer.
what else ya want carly To do for ya -- Wash your tour bus? sam how 'bout twenty bucks? no! beat it, clown! One and two and good, Tell your mom to call me And good and pull and-- I wanna stop! why?! cuz I've already been doin' this for forty-five seconds! Where's the dang fudge?! no more fudge! I hate you! Awww, kid Bethany What's wrong? Wow, you're already sweating.
no one likes me -- 'cuz I'm awkward.
you're not awkward.
I'm not? you just have a terrible, Terrible personality.
You're so mean.
And look at your shirt What is that stain? mucus.
okay, well some people don't wanna be friends With girls Who have mucus all over them.
I need a make-over.
well Yeaaahh.
But you also need to be nicer To people.
And snot less on yourself.
I wanna make-over!!! all right!!! And if harry's not better By Friday, We'll have to cancel our shows In san francisco.
san francisco! Mah town! Wooo! I've never been there.
well I feel awful.
I don't know Why he's not getting better.
oh carly Oh, sweet, innocent, Stupid little carly.
why am I stupid? harry Doesn't wanna get better -- 'cuz you make him Breakfast in bed, And you warm his socks, And read him stories And brush his hair And, you know, you're not ugly.
what do you think, hot pants? well, if you were treating me Like you've been treating harry, I sure wouldn't wanna leave.
you think harry's faking? not faking.
I'm sure he was sick.
I just think, Now, he's havin' a good time At "Hotel carlyfornia.
" you did not just say that.
I said it And I'm proud of it.
oh.
Uh.
okay, so what are we gonna do about this? uh, I know What might motivate harry To get outta bed And back on stage.
you think I should work him over With the butter sock? y'know, I really Really don't.
did she say 'butter sock'? is that a sock? full of butter? do you guys wanna hear my idea? yes.
does it involve the butter sock? no! Look, I was just thinking Harry might suddenly feel better If he thought He was gonna be replaced In one direction.
whoa, wait -- replace harry? not for real.
We just make him think he's being replaced.
who with? Baby, you light up my world Like nobody else The way that you flip Your hair Gets me overwhelmed But when you smile At the ground It ain't hard to tell stop it!!! Oh, oh You don't know You're beautiful nooooo! what? please get rid of him.
I'm feeling better.
you really think You can perform? yes! What time's icarly? 'bout an hour.
you're not even wearing A watch.
well I'll be ready! Just please Don't let him sing or dance, Ever again.
yeah.
whoa! well that worked.
it really worked! it worked great.
wait What worked? and Done.
Make-over complete.
I wanna see, I wanna see!!! okay.
oh my god! I look awful! noooo, you look great! you made me look worse Than I did when I got here! but I-- moron! bethany wait! Bethany c'mon, come back! Our story can't just end Like this! We need some kind of resolution! okay icarly fans 'tiz the moment Ya been waitin' for.
five super-cool guys All without jungle worms.
we give you The fantaztical Boybandable One Direction One Direction - What makes you beautiful You're insecure Don't know what for You're turning heads When you walk Through the door Don't need makeup To cover up Being the way that you are Is enough Everyone else in the room Can see it Everyone else but you Baby, you light up my world Like nobody else The way that you flip Your hair Gets me overwhelmed But when you smile At the ground It ain't hard to tell You don't know Oh oh You don't know You're beautiful If only you saw What I can see You'd understand Why I want you so desperately Right now I'm looking at you And I can't believe You don't know Oh oh You don't know You're beautiful Oh, oh, oh That's what makes you Beautiful So girl, come on You got it wrong To prove I'm right I put it in a song I don't know why You're being shy And turn away when I look Into your eyes Everyone else in the room can see it.
Everyone else but you Baby, you light up my world like nobody else The way that you flip your head Gets me overwhelmed But when you smile at the ground It ain't hard to tell You don't know Oh oh You don't know beautiful If only you saw what I can see You'd understand Why I want you so desperately Right now I'm looking at you And I can't believe You don't know Oh oh You don't know you're beautiful Oh, oh, oh That's what makes you beautiful