Nip/Tuck s06e02 Episode Script
Enigma
previously on "nip/tuck" We're still friends.
No, we're not friends.
I'm your wife.
That's liz's attorney.
She's suing me for divorce.
Just calm down! You know what'll calm me down?A boat--yours.
Sean mcnamara, will you marry me? Yes.
What is going on with you? I haven't been able to sleep.
Sean.
Sean? Sean! Wake up, sean! Shit.
Christian! Christian! Christian! Christian, get up! What happened? I don't know.
I woke up, and he was like this.
Sean.
Sean! Call 911.
Go.
Jesus.
Jesus.
Come on.
Did you see him take those pills? No, I didn'T.
I didn't even know.
We're gonna have to pump his stomach.
- Paramedics are coming.
- No, we don't have time for that, all right? Just maintain his airway.
Come on, sean.
Come on, sean.
Hold his mouth.
Keep it open.
- Ok? - ok.
He was already given a gastric levage.
What the hell is taking so long? Christian, it's only been 10 minutes.
Did I ask you? Look.
I am as worried about him as you are.
Really, sweetheart? Is that why you gave him prescription sleeping pills? I gave him a prescription because he couldn't sleep.
How was I supposed to know he'd abuse it? Do you have any idea what kind of stress he's been under? Do you? I thought that was just him.
Oh, beautiful.
That's why he's living the lifestyles of the rich and famous with you and trying to pay child support and trying to keep the business from going under.
He told me you were purposely cutting back.
We did an infomercial for vaginal rejuvenation, for god's sake.
We got another surgeon in so that we could get an extra 10%.
Are you blind? He's hanging on by a thread.
Something must have happened.
I proposed to him.
You what? I proposed to him.
Oh, gee, no pressure there.
Miss.
Come on, help me out here.
You know what? You can get some rest.
- I can take care of this consult.
- I'm fine.
You're blowing the whole thing out of proportion.
I took one sleeping pill, i still couldn't sleep, so I took another one, that's all.
It could have happened to anybody.
Anybody who washes pills down with a fifth of glen kella.
I said I'm fine.
Let's drop it.
Tell us what you don't like about yourself, jared.
My name's enigma.
Jared chose that name because he says it expresses how he feels, and it's pretty descriptive for us, too.
Well, tell us about your scarification.
Skin was professionally removed by a scalpel.
Lasers won't fix these.
We should be able to remove them with skin grafts or z-plasty incisions.
Oh, thank god.
Well, that's a start.
Turn around, jared.
Show the doctors what else you've done.
Please turn around, enigma.
Can you do anything about that horrible thing, doctors? It looks like it was well done, meaning all the ink is at the same level.
It makes laser removal much easier.
It should take about 6 to 8 treatments, and after that, with the hair regrowing, it should be unnoticeable.
Enigma, do you want these procedures? No.
The way I look is the way I feel inside.
I don't want to change a thing.
Well, I'm sorry, mr.
And mrs.
Mccloud, but if your son doesn't want these removed, you can't force him to, even though he is a minor.
We're fully aware of that, dr.
Troy.
I'm a criminal attorney.
But enigma, garth, and I have a contract.
It's something that we all agreed upoN.
They agreed to send me to military school if I don't have them removed.
Don't make it sound so one-sided, son.
We agreed to let you listen to the music that you like.
I said that I would call you enigma until your 18th birthday.
I wish you would have aborted me.
We don't know why this happened.
All his life, he's been attracted to the darker side of his personality.
He's--he's been this way since he was a small child.
We tried to go along for a while, but carving the sign of the devil into your forehead is going too far.
His darkness is destroying our family.
One set crystal tumblers with decanter.
Do you think this trim here is solid gold? - I don't know.
- Of course it is, fool! Get your grubby fingerprints off it.
What the hell's going on? You have ignored all of my requests for an itemized account of everything on this-- Don't you touch it! So you board her illegally.
Not illegally, by court order.
Get that away from me.
Where can I find the keys to the stateroom? Who are you?I don't even recognize you.
Look.
I tried to be empathetic, I've tried to be understanding and kind, but you could give a shit.
Fine, you want to wallow in your misery, you want to make me the bogeyman, that's fine, all right? Just don't take my boat! Oh, no.
I know how important this thing is to you.
It represents the beginning of your new life, a new life that i was not invited to be part of.
You know, I don't even like boats.
So you know what? I think I'm gonna burn it, like a giant funeral pyre commemorating the death of our marriage.
But first, I'm gonna have all my lesbian friends come, and we're gonna have a big bash, and we're gonna wear our bikinis and rub each other with coconut oil and give this piece of shit the sendoff it deserves! You think we could launch our jet skis from here? Lizzie, you're all wet.
I'm sorry.
That was way out of line.
I saw it.
I saw him push your overboard.
I hope you have a hidden trust fund somewhere because-- This is none of your business, specs.
You've just lost your case, all right? I am gonna go call mrs.
Troy's lawyer.
You can consider me a witness.
Give me your hand.
I want to thank you.
I thank you because you know what, christian? Now I'm getting it all.
I am getting the boat, I'm getting the car, and I'm getting the house!Oh, my god! And the only thing that you're ever gonna be left with is a truckful of regret and your big dick.
Liz Jesus.
Big dick.
Stay still.
Are we done? I have to pick my daughter up from day care.
We are all done, and you will never have to see me again, for your moustache, anyways.
Of course, you might want to think about doing your bikini line.
- How often do you wax? - Excuse me? Orange face push too hard.
Nobody like the hard sell.
And those chicken legsshe need to eat some pork.
What's so funny, you two? Nothing, kimmie.
We say you are a good businesswoman.
This is tea tree oil.
I want you to use this twice a day.
Thanks.
Ok.
Mani-pedi? No, I'm, uh, looking for--you have an electrolysis person? Kimber henry? What are you doing here?I'm booked.
Go.
Look at you, huh? From the first lady of porn to frying follicles on ventura boulevard.
I mean, sweetie, you can't make that shit up.
This is my place of business, christian.
Why are you here? Your place of business.
This is bullshit.
You and I both know that.
Right? Tony Curtis must have broke her heart bad.
I have an offer you can't refuse.
Yeah? What's that? I want to get into your business.
What, laser hair removal? No.
Don't be stupid.
Skin flicks.
Oh, stop it.
What? I'm serious.
I mean, we could come up with a great concept, you know? I mean, turn it into a series or something, right? Seriously, come up with a--i don't know.
What about me banging you, you know, and a bunch of other chicks with a bag on my head so nobody recognizes me.
I did that with a chick once, you know? It was very interesting.
She was the one that wore the bag, but You know, I get 3 or 4 phone calls a week begging me to make a comeback.
They say, "whatever you want, kimber.
" So if vivid and vixen can't pull me back in, christian, why in the world would you think you could? Well, at least you know somebody still wants you.
Oh, and they do.
You know, uh, just this morning, I was presented with this opportunity to launch my own sex toy line.
So I'm still a goddess in this sordid business.
I just don't want to do it.
Sounds good.
I'll do it.
Do what? Make a mold of my dick.
- Oh, god.
- No, come on! Think about it.
Make a mold of little--little christian, you know.
We'll market it like "kimber henry's favorite love buddy.
" Right?I mean, whatever.
I mean, you know, that's your thing.
You know?That's good, right? Yeah.
You're crazy.
I'm not crazy.
Don't tell me it's not the prettiest thing you ever saw.
Come on, perfect girth, perfect length.
We can make a shitload of money.
I don't know if you heard or not, but I'm going through a divorce right now, so Oh.
Well, I'm--I'm really sorry to hear that.
Just think about it.
Poor orange face Hey.
How come you didn't come over last night? How come you didn't tell me that you have a death wish? I don'T.
Look.
I made a mistake.
I should have known better than mixing sleeping pills with alcohol.
I'm sorry.
So am I.
What for? There is no trust here.
And I cannot build a relationship on a mountain of bullshit.
I think we should just take a giant step back, put our engagement on hold.
Christian told me everything.
The fact that you think that i can't handle your being broke, i mean-- I'm not broke.
No? I just don't have the cash flow right now.
I guess I felt too embarrassed to tell you that.
You're gonna break off our engagement over this? I wish you knew me better, sean.
Things mean nothing to me.
Honesty--that means everything.
Hey.
I was just, uh, looking for a q-tip.
Give me my pills.
I didn't take your goddamn pills.
I said, give me my pills, all right? I'm not gonna watch you sabotage your life like this.
It's enough I have to watch my son do it.
Give them to me.
Give them to me, or I will call the state and have them revoke your license to prescribe.
I can't sleep.
Teddy just broke up with me.
Your inability to deal with your anxiety started a long time before teddy.
You're dancing on the precipice of a big black hole, my friend, whether you'd like to admit it or not.
I'll just see you go to rehab before I watch you fall in.
I find one more pill missing, i mean one, from me or the office, and I swear to you I will call the state board and the dea and have you reported, you understand? What the hell is she doing here? I specifically requested teddy for all of my surgeries.
Tough titties, christian.
She asked if I could cover, and I said that I could.
Sorry.
I heard you and teddy broke up, sean.
So am I.
Come on, let's get this over with.
"The only light is darkness.
" This kid's a bowl of smiles, isn't he? Looks like he just carved it.
I get 50% of the profits, ok? Fine.
If you're gonna drag me through the mud again, I might as well get rich doing it.
And, uh, I need to start a college fund for jenna.
Fine.
Just do it.
Rub a thick coating of this all over your genitals and make yourself hard.
Can you give me a hand? Christian, do it.
Gee.
Come on, baby, can you give me a hand here? Not after what you've put me through.
Come on, give me--just--just let me--let me touch those pretty babies.
Come on.
Oh, that's good.
That's it.
Quick! Come on, hurry up.
Pour the mold before I lose my wood.
- Come on! - Ok.
- Lay back.
- Before I lose the woody!All right! How long does this take to set? What? 20 minutes? Just think of me.
Oh! No way, sweetie.
I'll probably be thinking about how much money I'll make.
The food sucks.
And they use dishwater for the coffee.
You're better off just eating the actual menu.
Trouble sleeping? You see that guy? Truck salesman.
He got laid off.
Had to cash in his 401(k).
Now he's broke.
That one? Failed her mcats 3 times, thinks she's never gonna be a doctor.
That poor bastard? Lost his house in a fire, didn't have insurance.
Ok.
What about you?What's your story? Fiance dumped mehard.
You? Something similar and then some.
Vivien.
Sean.
You decided yet? He's not hungry.
Vivien, you can't keep telling people about the food.
I need the tips.
Oh, god.
She's such a bitch.
Actually, I did want to eat.
Yeah, but I know what you're really hungry for.
Sleep.
Come with me, I'll show you where you can get some.
Careful there, buddy boy.
I don't think you realize how big it is.
Not even close, milton berle.
Just try and relax.
It's pulling my pubes.
Why'd you want a mold of his dick, anyway? So you don't get lonely when he goes out of town? I'm not dating kimber, all right, mike? Kimber is the mother of my granddaughter.
I know that's hard to believe since I'm so good-looking, but, anyway, she's got some money problems, and I have this fantastic attribute, so I'm helping her out.
We're gonna make millions on this thing, right? Actually, he's the one with the money problems.
He came to me here.
Thank you.
I have to tell you, I've always been a big fan of your work.
Oh, jesus.
Get this off my dick, would you? All right.
All right.
Oh, thank god.
That's it? So that's what the big fuss is about? Like you've ever seen bigger? I got to go.
Look.
You're gonna want to soak it for a while, but you'll be fine.
Thanks, doc.
Hope to see you soon, kimber.
Nice seeing you, mike.
Oh, for christ's sakes, snap yourself out of it, would you? As if mike would date an old leather shoe like you.
Whatever, christian.
So, uh, we'll do this again tomorrow night, right? Yeah?I promise I'll shave better.
No.
No?What are you talking about? Come on, we're gonna make a pile of money out of this thing.
We're a great team.
Think of jenna.
Ok.
Sotomorrow night at 9:00? I find this place very relaxing.
You find it relaxing to be around human suffering? We're all suffering, sean.
It's just that these people can't hide it.
Watching them bleed makes me feel lessalone.
What do you think happened to that guy? Ahspinal cord injury, probably from a car accident.
How do you know? He has a compound fracture of his femur, and he's not squirming in pain.
You a doctor or something? Plastic surgeon.
- Nice.
- Yeah.
- Him? - Um uh, broke his hand.
Um, pretty badly, from the looks of the swelling.
Tell me more.
Tell me whatbones he's broken.
The--the metacarpals, the middle phalanges.
Possible that he punched someone.
It would not be uncommon for him to break the scaphoid as well.
Him? He has lung cancer.
Stage 3.
I don't think he's gonna live through the night.
So this is what you do? You get off in the E.
R.
, And it puts you to sleep? I come for the oxycontin.
Two of those little sweethearts, and I'm in snooze city.
- But now that I've met you - No.
I can'T.
It's a schedule ii controlled substance.
If I abuse my power, I get my license stripped.
Bummer.
So you just fake being sick? Yeah.
I tried.
They see right through that.
So then how do you get them? Like this.
Jesus!What are you doing? Doctor man.
What are you still doing here? You must really like me.
I want my cut.
Give me half the pills, or I'm gonna march in there and tell them about your scam.
You might sleep well tonight, but good luck getting any more pills out of them.
I think I might have hit a nerve when I forked myself.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You certainly frayed the muscle tissue, and whoever stitched you up belongs in a butcher shop.
I assume you don't have any insurance.
Do your plastic surgeon thing, and the pills are all yours.
Deal.
So, are we ready to see some nice, clean skin? Yeah.
Let's take a look.
Just gonna take the bandages off, ok? It might be a little tender.
We've got our son back.
Would you like to see the results? Yeah.
What do you think, enigma? AhI--i feel a lightness.
I feel like death and hate aren't staring back at me for the first time in a while.
I think enigma's dead.
My name's jared.
Do you really have to put me out? Unless you enjoy excruciating pain, in which case I'll happily leave you two alone.
Don't worry about teddy.
I'll be the one doing all the heavy lifting.
Just lay down and get comfortable.
So how'd you sleep last night? Like a baby after a warm bottle.
Mmm.
Me, too.
I'm glad you trusted me.
Please name as many U.
S.
Presidents as you can for me.
Bush.
Nixon.
Bush.
Dr.
Mcnamara, she's all yours.
But then, I suppose you knew that already.
When we're done here, I want you to pack your things and go.
You're firing me? It sucks getting dumped, doesn't it? Except I'll be a gentleman about it, give you two weeks' severance.
I'd rather get the ring i gave you back.
It's worth more.
It's in my office.
If you leave your key on my desk, you can have it back.
Teddy.
What are you doing in sean's office? Umjust picking up the ring that I gave him.
Kind of a closure.
If only it were that easy, right? The only possible closure i could have with christian would land me in a maximum-security prison.
I just love him so much.
You know?I justI do.
I'll be fine.
Um, please don't tell him you saw me like this, ok? - I'd really rather he didn't know.
- No worries.
Ok, kimber henry.
My dick is in your hands.
Don't blow it.
At least she knows how.
You sad, sad girl.
Excuse me? Talk about a sucker.
He dangles his dingle right in front of you, and you're down on your knees.
What's this? Oh, that's right--legal fees.
Give me back christian's cock.
Don't you dare.
You have not learned a thing.
You sound like the bitter,spiteful, jilted ex-wife you are.
You are such a loser, kimber.
You think you can make him change? I have seen him treat you like shit.
He traded your ass in for a goddamn car.
What's it gonna take for you to realize what you're dealing with? You have no idea who he is, liz.
You never have.
That's why you up there saying those vows at an altar was a joke.
That's why I left.
You're a joke, kimber, and the reason you had to leave was because you weren't standing up there.
And if you think cashing in on his cock is gonna make that dream come true, then you haven't learned anything in all these years, and I think that that is so unbearably pathetic.
You think that you can wipe out his darkness with your love? You can't, and you know why? Because underneath that darkness, there's nothing there.
I deserve better than that.
I don't know about you.
Why don't you just go ahead and kiss him? I'm always looking for balance.
My pecs are lagging, I just hit it harder in the gym next time.
Fascinating.
Damn, hate it when that happens.
The water is cold.
Hey, hey! Hey, there's the guy I'm looking for.
- Check out these numbers.
- Ok.
The distributor put the kimber henry love rocket into 30 stores in the los angeles/san francisco markets two days ago.
Well, they've already sold out, 5,000 units.
Whoa, all right, kimber.
- I'm so happy for you.
- Thanks.
What the hell you hugging him for? It's my cock that's selling like hotcakes.
Well, actually, it's not, christian.
It's mike'S.
What? Well, I hope it's cool, christian.
You know, after I saw how magnificent his manhood was, i knew he was the only man that could really make the splash that I needed to launch my new product line.
Oh, I'm taking you to spago to celebrate.
- I'll see you.
- Bye.
You're a whore, kimber.
We had a deal, little bitch.
Like you wouldn't have sold me out for half a penny.
I can barely breathe, it's so hot in here.
Let me turn on the air conditioner.
Yeah.
Like that? Yeah.
Come here.
Ohthe iceman wants to cometh again? Yeah.
Third time is the charm, and if it isn't, what better way to pass the hours? You're objectifying me, you know? You're using me for a sleeping pill.
Well, you're doing a shitty job.
Hey, you got any more of that oxy left? No.
I chew them like pez.
We could get more.
Oh, that was crazy.
Yeah, yeah, but it worked, right? Got us what we needed.
I suggest the thigh.
It's fleshy, and it heals quick.
No.
It's your turn.
Fair is fair.
This is not who we are.
Really? Who are we? We're two people suffering from psychosis due to an extended lack of sleep.
Whatever.
At least I'm trying to do something about it.
Not this way.
Jesus.
I shouldn't be doing this.
I just broke up with someone.
So did you.
If they gave out awards for craziest rebound, we would win, right? That's what I am to you, just some rebound? Stab yourself.
You owe it to me.
You know what? I've had enough self-destruction for a lifetime.
No, no, no, no, no.
Please.
I don't want to be in this alone.
Don't you get it? You stay awake long enough, you lose touch with reality.
It's like we're hallucinating.
This is a hallucination? I think I might be in love with you.
The doctor will be along shortly to stitch you up.
In the meantime, here's some medicine for the pain.
Dr.
Beyman, telephone.
Blair, dr.
Blair We have a breaking story in pasadena, where police are removing the bodies from what they are calling a double homicide and suicide.
Garth and amanda mccloud were found murdered in their home, shot then mutilated by their own son, who then turned the gun on himself.
Friends and family of the slain couple say their son, jared mccloud, referred to himself as enigma.
Garth mccloud was a professor of biology at city college, and his wife amanda was a criminal attorney known best for her work in the rico cases of the early 1980s.
Neighbors says that over the past few years What do you want, lizzie? The family had been struggling with jared's insistence You're watching the news, huh? Yep.
I'm watching the news.
They were good people.
They never gave up on their son.
He just couldn't face that he was just one of those people, just bad to the bone.
Ok.
That's enough.
Ok, so lay it on me.
I'm sure you got another piece of shit for me to eat.
When I look at that kid, i see what it's like to live in your anger, and I could feel it happening to me.
As devastated as I was when you dumped me, it was nothing compared to the hell that I have been in.
I'm dropping the lawsuit.
That's it.
Game over.
I just wanted you to know.
You're jerking me off, right? Not anymore.
Are you doing the right thing, lizzie? I know it's not easy.
Actually, it's easier than i imagined.
Hating you and living in that darkness was taking up too much space in my head, and I wanted it out.
I missed you, you know? Christian It's so weird thinking that you hated me.
You're not listening to me.
I've let my hatred go, and i don't plan on thinking about you at all.
Great, I mean, as long as we can just stay good friends, you know? You know what? We can'T.
No, we're not friends.
I'm your wife.
That's liz's attorney.
She's suing me for divorce.
Just calm down! You know what'll calm me down?A boat--yours.
Sean mcnamara, will you marry me? Yes.
What is going on with you? I haven't been able to sleep.
Sean.
Sean? Sean! Wake up, sean! Shit.
Christian! Christian! Christian! Christian, get up! What happened? I don't know.
I woke up, and he was like this.
Sean.
Sean! Call 911.
Go.
Jesus.
Jesus.
Come on.
Did you see him take those pills? No, I didn'T.
I didn't even know.
We're gonna have to pump his stomach.
- Paramedics are coming.
- No, we don't have time for that, all right? Just maintain his airway.
Come on, sean.
Come on, sean.
Hold his mouth.
Keep it open.
- Ok? - ok.
He was already given a gastric levage.
What the hell is taking so long? Christian, it's only been 10 minutes.
Did I ask you? Look.
I am as worried about him as you are.
Really, sweetheart? Is that why you gave him prescription sleeping pills? I gave him a prescription because he couldn't sleep.
How was I supposed to know he'd abuse it? Do you have any idea what kind of stress he's been under? Do you? I thought that was just him.
Oh, beautiful.
That's why he's living the lifestyles of the rich and famous with you and trying to pay child support and trying to keep the business from going under.
He told me you were purposely cutting back.
We did an infomercial for vaginal rejuvenation, for god's sake.
We got another surgeon in so that we could get an extra 10%.
Are you blind? He's hanging on by a thread.
Something must have happened.
I proposed to him.
You what? I proposed to him.
Oh, gee, no pressure there.
Miss.
Come on, help me out here.
You know what? You can get some rest.
- I can take care of this consult.
- I'm fine.
You're blowing the whole thing out of proportion.
I took one sleeping pill, i still couldn't sleep, so I took another one, that's all.
It could have happened to anybody.
Anybody who washes pills down with a fifth of glen kella.
I said I'm fine.
Let's drop it.
Tell us what you don't like about yourself, jared.
My name's enigma.
Jared chose that name because he says it expresses how he feels, and it's pretty descriptive for us, too.
Well, tell us about your scarification.
Skin was professionally removed by a scalpel.
Lasers won't fix these.
We should be able to remove them with skin grafts or z-plasty incisions.
Oh, thank god.
Well, that's a start.
Turn around, jared.
Show the doctors what else you've done.
Please turn around, enigma.
Can you do anything about that horrible thing, doctors? It looks like it was well done, meaning all the ink is at the same level.
It makes laser removal much easier.
It should take about 6 to 8 treatments, and after that, with the hair regrowing, it should be unnoticeable.
Enigma, do you want these procedures? No.
The way I look is the way I feel inside.
I don't want to change a thing.
Well, I'm sorry, mr.
And mrs.
Mccloud, but if your son doesn't want these removed, you can't force him to, even though he is a minor.
We're fully aware of that, dr.
Troy.
I'm a criminal attorney.
But enigma, garth, and I have a contract.
It's something that we all agreed upoN.
They agreed to send me to military school if I don't have them removed.
Don't make it sound so one-sided, son.
We agreed to let you listen to the music that you like.
I said that I would call you enigma until your 18th birthday.
I wish you would have aborted me.
We don't know why this happened.
All his life, he's been attracted to the darker side of his personality.
He's--he's been this way since he was a small child.
We tried to go along for a while, but carving the sign of the devil into your forehead is going too far.
His darkness is destroying our family.
One set crystal tumblers with decanter.
Do you think this trim here is solid gold? - I don't know.
- Of course it is, fool! Get your grubby fingerprints off it.
What the hell's going on? You have ignored all of my requests for an itemized account of everything on this-- Don't you touch it! So you board her illegally.
Not illegally, by court order.
Get that away from me.
Where can I find the keys to the stateroom? Who are you?I don't even recognize you.
Look.
I tried to be empathetic, I've tried to be understanding and kind, but you could give a shit.
Fine, you want to wallow in your misery, you want to make me the bogeyman, that's fine, all right? Just don't take my boat! Oh, no.
I know how important this thing is to you.
It represents the beginning of your new life, a new life that i was not invited to be part of.
You know, I don't even like boats.
So you know what? I think I'm gonna burn it, like a giant funeral pyre commemorating the death of our marriage.
But first, I'm gonna have all my lesbian friends come, and we're gonna have a big bash, and we're gonna wear our bikinis and rub each other with coconut oil and give this piece of shit the sendoff it deserves! You think we could launch our jet skis from here? Lizzie, you're all wet.
I'm sorry.
That was way out of line.
I saw it.
I saw him push your overboard.
I hope you have a hidden trust fund somewhere because-- This is none of your business, specs.
You've just lost your case, all right? I am gonna go call mrs.
Troy's lawyer.
You can consider me a witness.
Give me your hand.
I want to thank you.
I thank you because you know what, christian? Now I'm getting it all.
I am getting the boat, I'm getting the car, and I'm getting the house!Oh, my god! And the only thing that you're ever gonna be left with is a truckful of regret and your big dick.
Liz Jesus.
Big dick.
Stay still.
Are we done? I have to pick my daughter up from day care.
We are all done, and you will never have to see me again, for your moustache, anyways.
Of course, you might want to think about doing your bikini line.
- How often do you wax? - Excuse me? Orange face push too hard.
Nobody like the hard sell.
And those chicken legsshe need to eat some pork.
What's so funny, you two? Nothing, kimmie.
We say you are a good businesswoman.
This is tea tree oil.
I want you to use this twice a day.
Thanks.
Ok.
Mani-pedi? No, I'm, uh, looking for--you have an electrolysis person? Kimber henry? What are you doing here?I'm booked.
Go.
Look at you, huh? From the first lady of porn to frying follicles on ventura boulevard.
I mean, sweetie, you can't make that shit up.
This is my place of business, christian.
Why are you here? Your place of business.
This is bullshit.
You and I both know that.
Right? Tony Curtis must have broke her heart bad.
I have an offer you can't refuse.
Yeah? What's that? I want to get into your business.
What, laser hair removal? No.
Don't be stupid.
Skin flicks.
Oh, stop it.
What? I'm serious.
I mean, we could come up with a great concept, you know? I mean, turn it into a series or something, right? Seriously, come up with a--i don't know.
What about me banging you, you know, and a bunch of other chicks with a bag on my head so nobody recognizes me.
I did that with a chick once, you know? It was very interesting.
She was the one that wore the bag, but You know, I get 3 or 4 phone calls a week begging me to make a comeback.
They say, "whatever you want, kimber.
" So if vivid and vixen can't pull me back in, christian, why in the world would you think you could? Well, at least you know somebody still wants you.
Oh, and they do.
You know, uh, just this morning, I was presented with this opportunity to launch my own sex toy line.
So I'm still a goddess in this sordid business.
I just don't want to do it.
Sounds good.
I'll do it.
Do what? Make a mold of my dick.
- Oh, god.
- No, come on! Think about it.
Make a mold of little--little christian, you know.
We'll market it like "kimber henry's favorite love buddy.
" Right?I mean, whatever.
I mean, you know, that's your thing.
You know?That's good, right? Yeah.
You're crazy.
I'm not crazy.
Don't tell me it's not the prettiest thing you ever saw.
Come on, perfect girth, perfect length.
We can make a shitload of money.
I don't know if you heard or not, but I'm going through a divorce right now, so Oh.
Well, I'm--I'm really sorry to hear that.
Just think about it.
Poor orange face Hey.
How come you didn't come over last night? How come you didn't tell me that you have a death wish? I don'T.
Look.
I made a mistake.
I should have known better than mixing sleeping pills with alcohol.
I'm sorry.
So am I.
What for? There is no trust here.
And I cannot build a relationship on a mountain of bullshit.
I think we should just take a giant step back, put our engagement on hold.
Christian told me everything.
The fact that you think that i can't handle your being broke, i mean-- I'm not broke.
No? I just don't have the cash flow right now.
I guess I felt too embarrassed to tell you that.
You're gonna break off our engagement over this? I wish you knew me better, sean.
Things mean nothing to me.
Honesty--that means everything.
Hey.
I was just, uh, looking for a q-tip.
Give me my pills.
I didn't take your goddamn pills.
I said, give me my pills, all right? I'm not gonna watch you sabotage your life like this.
It's enough I have to watch my son do it.
Give them to me.
Give them to me, or I will call the state and have them revoke your license to prescribe.
I can't sleep.
Teddy just broke up with me.
Your inability to deal with your anxiety started a long time before teddy.
You're dancing on the precipice of a big black hole, my friend, whether you'd like to admit it or not.
I'll just see you go to rehab before I watch you fall in.
I find one more pill missing, i mean one, from me or the office, and I swear to you I will call the state board and the dea and have you reported, you understand? What the hell is she doing here? I specifically requested teddy for all of my surgeries.
Tough titties, christian.
She asked if I could cover, and I said that I could.
Sorry.
I heard you and teddy broke up, sean.
So am I.
Come on, let's get this over with.
"The only light is darkness.
" This kid's a bowl of smiles, isn't he? Looks like he just carved it.
I get 50% of the profits, ok? Fine.
If you're gonna drag me through the mud again, I might as well get rich doing it.
And, uh, I need to start a college fund for jenna.
Fine.
Just do it.
Rub a thick coating of this all over your genitals and make yourself hard.
Can you give me a hand? Christian, do it.
Gee.
Come on, baby, can you give me a hand here? Not after what you've put me through.
Come on, give me--just--just let me--let me touch those pretty babies.
Come on.
Oh, that's good.
That's it.
Quick! Come on, hurry up.
Pour the mold before I lose my wood.
- Come on! - Ok.
- Lay back.
- Before I lose the woody!All right! How long does this take to set? What? 20 minutes? Just think of me.
Oh! No way, sweetie.
I'll probably be thinking about how much money I'll make.
The food sucks.
And they use dishwater for the coffee.
You're better off just eating the actual menu.
Trouble sleeping? You see that guy? Truck salesman.
He got laid off.
Had to cash in his 401(k).
Now he's broke.
That one? Failed her mcats 3 times, thinks she's never gonna be a doctor.
That poor bastard? Lost his house in a fire, didn't have insurance.
Ok.
What about you?What's your story? Fiance dumped mehard.
You? Something similar and then some.
Vivien.
Sean.
You decided yet? He's not hungry.
Vivien, you can't keep telling people about the food.
I need the tips.
Oh, god.
She's such a bitch.
Actually, I did want to eat.
Yeah, but I know what you're really hungry for.
Sleep.
Come with me, I'll show you where you can get some.
Careful there, buddy boy.
I don't think you realize how big it is.
Not even close, milton berle.
Just try and relax.
It's pulling my pubes.
Why'd you want a mold of his dick, anyway? So you don't get lonely when he goes out of town? I'm not dating kimber, all right, mike? Kimber is the mother of my granddaughter.
I know that's hard to believe since I'm so good-looking, but, anyway, she's got some money problems, and I have this fantastic attribute, so I'm helping her out.
We're gonna make millions on this thing, right? Actually, he's the one with the money problems.
He came to me here.
Thank you.
I have to tell you, I've always been a big fan of your work.
Oh, jesus.
Get this off my dick, would you? All right.
All right.
Oh, thank god.
That's it? So that's what the big fuss is about? Like you've ever seen bigger? I got to go.
Look.
You're gonna want to soak it for a while, but you'll be fine.
Thanks, doc.
Hope to see you soon, kimber.
Nice seeing you, mike.
Oh, for christ's sakes, snap yourself out of it, would you? As if mike would date an old leather shoe like you.
Whatever, christian.
So, uh, we'll do this again tomorrow night, right? Yeah?I promise I'll shave better.
No.
No?What are you talking about? Come on, we're gonna make a pile of money out of this thing.
We're a great team.
Think of jenna.
Ok.
Sotomorrow night at 9:00? I find this place very relaxing.
You find it relaxing to be around human suffering? We're all suffering, sean.
It's just that these people can't hide it.
Watching them bleed makes me feel lessalone.
What do you think happened to that guy? Ahspinal cord injury, probably from a car accident.
How do you know? He has a compound fracture of his femur, and he's not squirming in pain.
You a doctor or something? Plastic surgeon.
- Nice.
- Yeah.
- Him? - Um uh, broke his hand.
Um, pretty badly, from the looks of the swelling.
Tell me more.
Tell me whatbones he's broken.
The--the metacarpals, the middle phalanges.
Possible that he punched someone.
It would not be uncommon for him to break the scaphoid as well.
Him? He has lung cancer.
Stage 3.
I don't think he's gonna live through the night.
So this is what you do? You get off in the E.
R.
, And it puts you to sleep? I come for the oxycontin.
Two of those little sweethearts, and I'm in snooze city.
- But now that I've met you - No.
I can'T.
It's a schedule ii controlled substance.
If I abuse my power, I get my license stripped.
Bummer.
So you just fake being sick? Yeah.
I tried.
They see right through that.
So then how do you get them? Like this.
Jesus!What are you doing? Doctor man.
What are you still doing here? You must really like me.
I want my cut.
Give me half the pills, or I'm gonna march in there and tell them about your scam.
You might sleep well tonight, but good luck getting any more pills out of them.
I think I might have hit a nerve when I forked myself.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You certainly frayed the muscle tissue, and whoever stitched you up belongs in a butcher shop.
I assume you don't have any insurance.
Do your plastic surgeon thing, and the pills are all yours.
Deal.
So, are we ready to see some nice, clean skin? Yeah.
Let's take a look.
Just gonna take the bandages off, ok? It might be a little tender.
We've got our son back.
Would you like to see the results? Yeah.
What do you think, enigma? AhI--i feel a lightness.
I feel like death and hate aren't staring back at me for the first time in a while.
I think enigma's dead.
My name's jared.
Do you really have to put me out? Unless you enjoy excruciating pain, in which case I'll happily leave you two alone.
Don't worry about teddy.
I'll be the one doing all the heavy lifting.
Just lay down and get comfortable.
So how'd you sleep last night? Like a baby after a warm bottle.
Mmm.
Me, too.
I'm glad you trusted me.
Please name as many U.
S.
Presidents as you can for me.
Bush.
Nixon.
Bush.
Dr.
Mcnamara, she's all yours.
But then, I suppose you knew that already.
When we're done here, I want you to pack your things and go.
You're firing me? It sucks getting dumped, doesn't it? Except I'll be a gentleman about it, give you two weeks' severance.
I'd rather get the ring i gave you back.
It's worth more.
It's in my office.
If you leave your key on my desk, you can have it back.
Teddy.
What are you doing in sean's office? Umjust picking up the ring that I gave him.
Kind of a closure.
If only it were that easy, right? The only possible closure i could have with christian would land me in a maximum-security prison.
I just love him so much.
You know?I justI do.
I'll be fine.
Um, please don't tell him you saw me like this, ok? - I'd really rather he didn't know.
- No worries.
Ok, kimber henry.
My dick is in your hands.
Don't blow it.
At least she knows how.
You sad, sad girl.
Excuse me? Talk about a sucker.
He dangles his dingle right in front of you, and you're down on your knees.
What's this? Oh, that's right--legal fees.
Give me back christian's cock.
Don't you dare.
You have not learned a thing.
You sound like the bitter,spiteful, jilted ex-wife you are.
You are such a loser, kimber.
You think you can make him change? I have seen him treat you like shit.
He traded your ass in for a goddamn car.
What's it gonna take for you to realize what you're dealing with? You have no idea who he is, liz.
You never have.
That's why you up there saying those vows at an altar was a joke.
That's why I left.
You're a joke, kimber, and the reason you had to leave was because you weren't standing up there.
And if you think cashing in on his cock is gonna make that dream come true, then you haven't learned anything in all these years, and I think that that is so unbearably pathetic.
You think that you can wipe out his darkness with your love? You can't, and you know why? Because underneath that darkness, there's nothing there.
I deserve better than that.
I don't know about you.
Why don't you just go ahead and kiss him? I'm always looking for balance.
My pecs are lagging, I just hit it harder in the gym next time.
Fascinating.
Damn, hate it when that happens.
The water is cold.
Hey, hey! Hey, there's the guy I'm looking for.
- Check out these numbers.
- Ok.
The distributor put the kimber henry love rocket into 30 stores in the los angeles/san francisco markets two days ago.
Well, they've already sold out, 5,000 units.
Whoa, all right, kimber.
- I'm so happy for you.
- Thanks.
What the hell you hugging him for? It's my cock that's selling like hotcakes.
Well, actually, it's not, christian.
It's mike'S.
What? Well, I hope it's cool, christian.
You know, after I saw how magnificent his manhood was, i knew he was the only man that could really make the splash that I needed to launch my new product line.
Oh, I'm taking you to spago to celebrate.
- I'll see you.
- Bye.
You're a whore, kimber.
We had a deal, little bitch.
Like you wouldn't have sold me out for half a penny.
I can barely breathe, it's so hot in here.
Let me turn on the air conditioner.
Yeah.
Like that? Yeah.
Come here.
Ohthe iceman wants to cometh again? Yeah.
Third time is the charm, and if it isn't, what better way to pass the hours? You're objectifying me, you know? You're using me for a sleeping pill.
Well, you're doing a shitty job.
Hey, you got any more of that oxy left? No.
I chew them like pez.
We could get more.
Oh, that was crazy.
Yeah, yeah, but it worked, right? Got us what we needed.
I suggest the thigh.
It's fleshy, and it heals quick.
No.
It's your turn.
Fair is fair.
This is not who we are.
Really? Who are we? We're two people suffering from psychosis due to an extended lack of sleep.
Whatever.
At least I'm trying to do something about it.
Not this way.
Jesus.
I shouldn't be doing this.
I just broke up with someone.
So did you.
If they gave out awards for craziest rebound, we would win, right? That's what I am to you, just some rebound? Stab yourself.
You owe it to me.
You know what? I've had enough self-destruction for a lifetime.
No, no, no, no, no.
Please.
I don't want to be in this alone.
Don't you get it? You stay awake long enough, you lose touch with reality.
It's like we're hallucinating.
This is a hallucination? I think I might be in love with you.
The doctor will be along shortly to stitch you up.
In the meantime, here's some medicine for the pain.
Dr.
Beyman, telephone.
Blair, dr.
Blair We have a breaking story in pasadena, where police are removing the bodies from what they are calling a double homicide and suicide.
Garth and amanda mccloud were found murdered in their home, shot then mutilated by their own son, who then turned the gun on himself.
Friends and family of the slain couple say their son, jared mccloud, referred to himself as enigma.
Garth mccloud was a professor of biology at city college, and his wife amanda was a criminal attorney known best for her work in the rico cases of the early 1980s.
Neighbors says that over the past few years What do you want, lizzie? The family had been struggling with jared's insistence You're watching the news, huh? Yep.
I'm watching the news.
They were good people.
They never gave up on their son.
He just couldn't face that he was just one of those people, just bad to the bone.
Ok.
That's enough.
Ok, so lay it on me.
I'm sure you got another piece of shit for me to eat.
When I look at that kid, i see what it's like to live in your anger, and I could feel it happening to me.
As devastated as I was when you dumped me, it was nothing compared to the hell that I have been in.
I'm dropping the lawsuit.
That's it.
Game over.
I just wanted you to know.
You're jerking me off, right? Not anymore.
Are you doing the right thing, lizzie? I know it's not easy.
Actually, it's easier than i imagined.
Hating you and living in that darkness was taking up too much space in my head, and I wanted it out.
I missed you, you know? Christian It's so weird thinking that you hated me.
You're not listening to me.
I've let my hatred go, and i don't plan on thinking about you at all.
Great, I mean, as long as we can just stay good friends, you know? You know what? We can'T.