DC's Legends Of Tomorrow (2016) s06e03 Episode Script
The Ex-Factor
1
Hey, you're gonna
have to pay extra for that.
Whatever.
[electricity crackling.]
Whatever you want, take it.
- [alien.]
Where is your ruler? - [man.]
What ruler? [beeps.]
[alien.]
"The king defends his throne.
" This is your king.
Where is he? I don't know what you are talking about.
Please Don't kill me.
Yo, that's DJ S'more Money.
That's right.
He used to date Zari Tarazi before she disappeared.
I heard rehab.
[alien.]
Where can I find this S'more Money? Judging some crazy singing competition out in Hollywood.
[alien.]
That is an odd occupation for a king.
But, as is the way, I will challenge him to a death duel.
[theme music playing.]
[punk music playing on record player.]
You spurn my natural emotions [Constantine breathing heavily.]
- Are you hungry? I could cook.
- I'm good.
Why don't you stay the night this time? John - Stop talking.
- Okay.
- [cell phone chimes.]
- Oh.
Wait, what is that sound? The Buzzes.
- Hmm - The Buzzcocks? Oh, come on, it's only one of England's seminal punk rock bands.
Ever fallen in love with someone "Ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn't have fallen in love with?" Aw.
John, are you trying to tell me something? 'Course not.
Unless you're trying to tell me something? - 'Course not.
- Good.
Besides, great music is not just about the lyrics.
It's about the buzz.
The buzz.
The excitement that you get when you play something that's true and real.
[cell phone chimes.]
How many bloody phones do you have? Personal phone and business phone, a phone for all the Persian guys my mom tries to set me up with.
[whooshing.]
- And a phone for emergencies.
- [Behrad.]
It's Les-Lay.
You can open up your eyes, B.
We're decent.
Regrettably.
Zari! I know you told me not to bother you at your yoga retreat, but it's your ex, DJ S'mores.
He was eviscerated by an alien.
Ooh.
Wow, that is a lot to digest.
Yeah, so, I'm thinking, for the funeral, we need a statement dress.
It's his burial, but your red carpet! Bye! [Zari.]
History is literally being made.
DJ S'more Money's death is shattering records for most Cat-Chats in an hour.
The whole world saw it.
Apparently, the alien killed him during a live taping of Da Throne.
Da Throne? In our future, it's a wildly popular singing competition, and is single-handedly keeping network television alive in 2045.
I don't know which is more surprising.
An alien attacking Zari's ex-boyfriend or the fact that network TV still exists.
Gideon, do us a favor and bring up the video for them, will you? [Gideon.]
Smashing! I love an evisceration.
My name is Lord Knoxacrillion, and I am here to slay the king.
[growls.]
[Agent Sharpe.]
Why would one of Sara's pod aliens kill a reality star? Maybe the alien mistook S'more for a real king.
Yeah, and thought that he could usurp marshmallow man's power by offing the bastard.
Okay, so all we have to do is stop an alien from killing a celebrity.
Simple enough.
Let's suit up for La La Land.
- What a load of crap.
- [Constantine.]
Oh Yeah, Mick, uh Shower wouldn't do you wrong, mate.
[clicks tongue.]
Mick, use your words.
This is a spaceship, is it not? Why don't we use it to find Sara? [groans.]
Mick, we have been over this.
The galaxy is hundreds of billions of light years across, okay? One of those displaced aliens is going to lead us to Sara.
You and Spooner are gonna QB.
- Can you show her the ropes, please? - No.
I'm taking the day off.
You're gonna let him talk to you like that? I don't take it personal.
That's just Rory.
Yeah, he's worse than usual.
Sara's absence is really getting to him.
Yeah, I'm sure Sara's absence is really getting to Rory.
- Must be very hard for him, Nate.
- I'm sorry.
We're gonna find her.
I bet Sara's pulling a Thor: Ragnarok and she's kicking some aliens' asses and they're all shouting her name.
Sara! Sara! Sara! Sara! Sara! You have to wake up.
- Sara.
- [rustling.]
Whatever's out there, it's still tracking us.
[whimpers.]
Don't panic, Gary.
This is Sara freaking Lance.
A little Amelia Earhart poison isn't gonna slow you down.
[weakly.]
I I'm too weak, Gary.
I can't fight.
- It's on you.
- Me? I'm no fighter.
Kayla didn't exactly fight Spartacus now, did she? [imitates chomping.]
No, no, absolutely not.
Gary Gary, listen to me.
If I hadn't done unforgiveable things to survive, I never would've made it out the other side.
Now, Ava is my other side.
And I don't care if you have to eat your way through the entire solar system, I am gonna get back to her.
I'm getting back to her.
[announcer.]
The competition is heating up on this year's Da Throne.
With the golden buzzer still in play and the wild card yet to be revealed, anyone could still take the throne.
[crowd cheering.]
[upbeat music playing.]
[cell phone ringing.]
- Mâmân! - That's your ex? [sighs.]
Jealous? Of some life-size S'more who judges some soulless singing competition? Real musicians don't compete to win over the masses with mediocre auto-tuned drivel, love.
Spoken like a former punk guitarist.
- You wanna talk to Mom? - No.
Mâmân, I gotta go.
I love you.
No, I love you more.
Sending you mushes from Hollywood.
Yeah, I'm visiting Zari in Hollywood.
All right.
Every season has a secret celebrity contestant.
What? I read up on the rules.
Last year, President Dwayne Johnson showed up.
And for an old guy, he can still get down.
The Rock's the president? Please tell me John Cena is his chief of staff.
[Agent Sharpe over comms.]
Guys, focus.
We need to find a way into this place.
I got this.
[sighs.]
- Hold, please.
- You're kidding me.
- What? They're designer.
- Oh.
Right.
[exhales deeply.]
Hi! [people chattering excitedly.]
[cameras clicking.]
[announcer.]
Welcome back to Da Throne.
Our next performance starts now! [singing.]
Hand on a wheel I like to stay in control 'Cause I get mine independent My color's silver and gold Chain hang low like fruit from a branch It's a juice avalanche Dripping from my shoulders Down to my pants [woman on PA.]
Saucéy is on stage.
Can we get Hunter Moon to the left wing? - Hey.
- Whoa.
Yeah.
Uh, we really stand out, don't we? You hear that song? It's kind of catchy.
- Look at all this fruit - You want it Make a whole lot ofjuice with that - Fill it in my boots - I got it - Get a champagne flute with that - They see it, yeah, yeah [all cheering.]
Cat-Chat is losing its damn mind over that juicy performance.
What does last year's winner and the king of Da Throne have to say? [S'more Money.]
Sorry, babes, but that was weak.
[crowd groaning.]
Weak? That's not what you said last night.
- You said my fruit was - Whoa! Let's not kiss and tell.
Now, who do we have to the stage next? My! You are big and strong.
You must be our wild card contestant.
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
I am here to challenge the king.
[S'more Money scoffs.]
You and everyone else.
Can we get a hint, lover? Who's under the suit? My name is Lord Knoxacrillion.
And I am here to slay the king.
[Lord Knoxacrillion growls.]
[all cheering.]
DJ, drop that beat! [upbeat music playing.]
[groans.]
[grunting.]
[all cheering.]
[S'more Money.]
That was tight! My man, you are committed.
Wha-bam! [host.]
The gold buzzer? Looks like Lord Knoxacrillion is one step closer to capturing the throne! [S'more Money.]
I don't know how you're gonna top whatever that was.
But if you wanna be the king, figure it out fast, because you're going straight to the finals! [exclaims.]
You're supposed to be showing me the ropes.
Rule number one, stay out of my way.
I'm fresh out of Southern hospitality, so I ain't gonna tiptoe across eggshells like everybody else around here.
Rule number two, this place is like a revolving door.
- Don't unpack.
- Ah.
I see what's going on.
Ava told me you're the last of the original recruits.
I guess I'd be pissy, too, if I was the last OG.
What? Haircut got hitched.
Sara got kidnapped.
And I don't care.
And rule number three I drink on the job.
Guys, meet me in the lab.
The alien's 15 minutes of fame are up.
Um, excuse me, Mr.
Knoxacrillion It is "Lord," flesh-bag.
Oh.
Forgive me, Lord.
It seems that all the finalists have been upgraded to their own exclusive green room.
If you'll just follow me this way.
Mm-hmm.
So, if you would just step right up there.
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
I see no green in this room.
[Nate laughs.]
I told you the Iron Giant wouldn't be a problem.
Okay, the energy in here is way off.
Oh.
Yeah, looks like Spooner took over your den.
She moved my citrine crystal.
- I was manifesting abundance.
- I know.
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
On my planet, we use crystals to Hmm.
You do not have that word.
Procreate.
You know what, Knox? It is factoids like that that really captivate an audience.
Why don't you tell us a little bit more about what you know? Like, do you know where Sara Lance is? Your cardiovascular organ increased to 80 beats per minute when you said "Sara Lance.
" Do you know where Sara Lance is? Yes or no? What is a Sara Lance? Okay, let's try this again, shall we? How did you get to Earth? I was abducted from my home planet.
Eighteen hours ago, my pod crashed in a desert.
Then I woke from stasis to fulfill my prime directive.
Which is? To conquer new planets by challenging their rulers to death duels.
Okay, say you win, you hitch a ride home in like a space cabbie? My inevitable victory will be celebrated with an invasion.
[sighs.]
Picked up the alien vibes from across the ship and look at here, we already kidnapped him.
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
You did not steal me like a whelpling! I followed you here, but I am no prisoner.
- Gideon? - Gideon.
- Oh, um - Gideon! [Gideon.]
Lord Knoxacrillion's superior technology is superior.
Just say the word and I'll blow him to kingdom come.
Impossible! This suit is resistant to even thermonuclear weapons.
If you and your ruler cannot fight with honor, the challenge is canceled.
I will call my armada to invade your planet now.
- What? No, no, no, wait - [Nate.]
Stop We, uh, may be low peons [hesitates.]
but we're honored to explain to you that you got the rules all wrong.
Yeah, Knox.
Can I call you Knox? Listen, bubby.
Death duels isn't what our planet's really about.
Yeah.
Yeah, you see, here on Earth, we compete for the throne via song and dance.
And with those sick vocals, buddy, you're on your way to becoming the new king.
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
Song and dance? More proof you are an immature species.
Very well.
I accept the terms of the challenge.
Bring on Earth's best competitor.
Yes, Dragon Girls! - [Les-Lay.]
Sorry! - Oh! - Sneaky devil, isn't she? - This town's full of them.
Les-Lay, shouldn't you be off running Forbes magazine's - Business of the Year? - Yeah.
Well, we need to talk about Dragonesque, Zari.
Business is tradge.
Even the lip kits aren't selling.
- Everyone has lips.
- Spoken like a true capitalist.
Ignore him.
He thinks dour people have more depths.
You still love fame.
Speaking of, you've been out of the spotlight for too long.
The public doesn't wanna be someone they can't see.
[crunching.]
Cups are edible in 2045.
Eco-friendly is finally in.
Too little too late, if you ask me.
Okay, what about the shareholders? They're going to divest without the face of the company to promote it.
How is this happening? I spent my whole life building this brand.
[Agent Sharpe.]
Long, frustrating story cut short, the alien has to compete for Da Throne.
Nate and Behrad are escorting him to the studio now.
We need a new game plan.
- Aves, do you trust me? - Always, Z.
[S'more Money exhales.]
Look who's back.
Zari T.
Dodged a bullet when the engagement fell through.
Hashtag "blessed"! Um, actually, you're the one who proposed, so 'Cause I thought it would be good for my brand.
Big mistake! - Hey, simmer down, sunshine.
- [S'more Money.]
Who's the blond? [chuckles.]
You know, you Yanks are always behind the eight-ball.
I'm a Master of the Dark Arts, mate, name's Johnny C.
Zari's boyfriend.
Yep.
[S'more Money.]
Dating some Vegas act isn't gonna abracadabra your relevancy back, Zari.
- [laughs.]
- You're over.
You should've never [in Latin.]
Ignis! [S'more Money.]
Now, I'm on top of it Help! Help! Help! Help me! Come on.
No, no, no.
Nobody burn the vodka, that's an accelerant! Get out of my way! Get out of my way! Well, I see the appeal of this celebrity thing.
Hey, Z-Nation.
It's your girl, Zari Tarazi.
So, I have been working on something super top secret, and here it is.
[whispers.]
I'm the wild card.
That's right.
The Dragon Girl is here to claim Da Throne.
[upbeat music playing.]
[announcer.]
Da Throne's played its wild card, superstar Zari Tarazi, facing off against the sisters who can shred for the chance to compete against our golden buzzer winner in the finals.
Everybody wants it, but not everyone has what it takes to win Da Throne.
Friends, foes and neithers, the semifinals are here! Tonight, one contestant will be sent packing.
So, I hope they brought their good Louis.
Who will it be? So, how exactly is Zari throwing her hat in the ring in this circus supposed to put the kibosh on an alien invasion? Uh We're kind of a Swiss Army knife operation.
Every Legend has a utility.
So, when you've got a social influencer from the future, you go with that.
And you hope that being triple threat is still a thing.
Looks like you know how to handle your team.
- Hmm.
- Except Rory.
Yeah, well, he's a special case.
Yeah.
Back home, dealt with guys like him all the time.
You give 'em an inch, they'll take your truck and your virginity.
Next up, we've got the twins who've made K-pop twice as hot, versus this round's wild card, and the king's ex, Zari Tarazi.
It's sure to be spicy! [crowd cheering and applauding.]
[singing.]
Bonjour! Euros, dollars, pounds, yen Everywhere I go balling Paparazzi all on me Shopping spree in Italy Red carpet, world premiere So glamorous, they love to stare Merci beaucoup, enchanté Stunting in my Cartier Merci beaucoup, enchanté Beat face flawless Cash flow like the River Nile Queen, queen, queen, queen, queen Cover story every magazine Queen, queen, queen Merci beaucoup, enchanté Stunting in my Cartier Merci beaucoup, enchanté Bonsoir! [crowd cheering.]
That gave me drama! That gave me life! Now let's get into the results.
Yes! The Dragon Girl took to the skies and into the finals! Guess we know who's the baddest of the bunch.
That's a hell of a way to save the world.
[growls.]
[rustling.]
[woman.]
Hold.
[woman groans.]
[all scream.]
[retching.]
Ava? [belches.]
It's all right, Sara, you can come out now.
Sorry, things got a little out of hand.
You know how it is when you haven't had bone marrow in a while.
Right? Sara? Director Sharpe? [breathes heavily.]
A planet full of Ava clones? No! Why did you taste so good? Z, you were ratings gold, but those votes were a little too close for comfort.
[sighs.]
It's no big deal.
My next performance just needs to be bigger and splashier.
You know, those on-air interviews can really sway an audience.
And Da Throne viewers are suckers for a good love story.
Oh, my God.
- He'll need a new look.
- [gasps.]
[chuckles.]
Yeah, no.
Thanks, love.
I only have the one.
It'll take a little time and a lot of cooperation, but I can work with this.
Your sex appeal is totally going to waste.
And we have to do something about that hair.
Girl, it's a mess.
Whoa.
No, you're not touching my hair.
I'm not being funny.
Listen, this is my favorite jacket.
Don't take that away from me.
[chuckles.]
[cell phone chimes.]
- [man.]
Ma'am, you cannot come back here.
- [speaking Farsi.]
Mâmân? [sighs.]
I saw you on TV.
And I thought surely my daughter would tell me if she was competing on my favorite show.
It was sort of a last-minute thing.
And you're dating a street magician? First a DJ, now a conman? Zari, just because you're old doesn't mean you have to settle.
Okay, not every woman wants to have their first kid at 20.
[in Farsi.]
[in English.]
I love you, too.
Do you really care about that magic man? I will try my best to support you, no matter what.
No, um it won't last.
John is just a fling.
[chuckles.]
Thank goodness.
But, Zari darling, you look tired.
You need a little more makeup.
Where is he? We have to start rolling.
[Constantine exhales heavily.]
Oh, Nate and Behrad know what a girl wants.
You look hot.
Yeah, I look like that tosser, Criss Angel.
Right.
Remember, stick to the talking points pre-approved by Les-Lay.
Chin up.
Smile.
Easy-peasy.
[Les-Lay.]
In three, two, one.
Tonight we're getting all the tea in our exclusive interview with the Dragon Girl, Zari Tarazi.
And she's joined by her mysterious new beau, London street magician Johnny C.
Zari girl, you shocked the world when you entered Da Throne as a wild card after a prolonged absence from the public eye.
The Z-Nation is dying to know, where have you been? Honestly, focusing on self-care.
I've been traveling the world with close friends, visiting historical sites to die for.
It's all been super low-key.
And, Johnny, is that where you enter the picture? [clears throat.]
Yeah, yeah.
I suppose so, mate, yeah.
Oh, my gosh.
Our meet-cute was so romantic.
I was at a snowga retreat on a historically preserved glacier.
And there he was, showing off with his perfect scorpion pose.
[chuckles.]
We fell for each other instantly.
Yeah, that's a very poetic way of putting it.
Oh, my God, he's so modest.
John doesn't like to brag, but he's actually [whispers.]
minor royalty.
Well, now you know I got to ask, will there be wedding bells in the Dragon Girl's future? I mean, Princess Tarazi does have quite the ring to it, right? - It sounds magical.
- [crowd cheering.]
Yeah, you want to see some magic? Watch me disappear.
[crowd gasping.]
Um You know, we had a really long flight.
He's probably just jet-lagged.
[nervous chuckle.]
[all murmuring.]
- Damn it, John.
- That was harsh.
What the hell was that? You know, I could ask you the same thing, couldn't I? What are you talking about? You just embarrassed me in front of the entire world.
Oh, that's all you care about, isn't it? Trending on bloody Chit-Chat.
Cat-Chat.
Admit it.
Come on, you're using this mission to get back on top.
I can save my home and my business.
And let's not pretend like we all haven't been caught up in your personal drama before.
Oh, yeah, I'm a bastard, but at least I admit it.
You'd rather be fake for the cameras than real when it counts.
- This isn't real.
- Oh, yeah? Remember? We are not together.
Just the way we both like it.
You know, it is really difficult to keep straight what's real anymore, but try this one on for size, all right? I am done.
[S'more Money.]
Trouble in paradise? I got just the thing to dry those tears.
An empowerment anthem.
Something for all the ladies out there.
Because after all, you wouldn't want the Z-Nation thinking some amateur magician clipped the Dragon Girl's wings now, would you? [sighs.]
[Sara breathing heavily.]
[groans.]
Ava, wait.
Slow down.
Where are we, babe? [door opens.]
After you.
[both grunting.]
- You think I don't know my own Ava? - [chokes.]
Gentle beings, we are joined by Lord Knoxacrillion.
If this interview goes anything like the last one, you can expect some bombshells.
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
I detect no explosives in the vicinity.
[laughs.]
That dry wit.
That's what Da Throne fans are loving about you.
But here's the million-dollar question.
Where on Earth did you come from? I am not from Earth.
I am from the planet Arkana.
[host.]
Oh, really? What do you think of your competition, the Dragon Girl, Zari Tarazi? That's an alien.
Unless she's spouting real fire, she does not stand a chance.
Feisty.
So, what made you enter Da Throne? Why haven't we caught him? We did.
It's complicated.
I was ambushed by a gangster feared all over the galaxy.
You would say she has a face with chicken wings on it.
Her name was Kayla.
- Gideon.
- [Gideon.]
Yes, Mr.
Rory.
Uncloak.
Initiate Matador's Last Strike.
What the hell are you doing, Rory? Last of the OG's picked up on a few secret commands.
You can't just fire on Hollywood.
- Watch me.
- [Gideon.]
Activating weapons systems.
[beeping.]
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
Foolish humans.
You think that is a threat? [Gideon.]
Shall I prepare to fire? - Yes.
- No! Die, you alien scum.
[clicking.]
Incoming! [Gideon.]
I am detecting alien battleships entering the Earth's atmosphere.
[alarm blaring.]
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
Fire on me and your ship will be destroyed.
Try another trick and the invasion will begin.
[alarm continues blaring.]
Rory, what the hell did you do? Uh The Earth was screwed anyway.
Mick, we need to talk, okay? [gun powering up.]
What, you're gonna shoot me? What the hell is wrong with you? If you were kidnapped by aliens, Sara would have found you by now.
[scoffs.]
You know what, you're right.
I wish I was the one taken, but I wasn't.
And I am sick of your bad attitude and your drinking and your lack of personal hygiene, okay? What would Lita say? She's at college.
- That's great.
- No, it's not.
She never returns my calls.
When she does, she's always whispering or she's at some party and there are [sighs.]
boys in the background.
Mick, just because Lita's busy, it doesn't mean she doesn't love you anymore.
Okay? It just means she doesn't need you.
But I need you.
Sara's missing.
It isn't just hard for you.
So get yourself together, okay? Or get the hell off my ship.
[exhales deeply.]
Hello, my old friend.
- Oh, bollocks! - [laughs.]
I'm sorry, did I scare you? Oh, my God.
You're smoking? Yeah, yeah, don't tell me in 2045 it's illegal.
Yes, but it's perfect.
It totally plays up the whole bad boy image you've got going on.
Cat-Chat went crazy when you dissed Z.
Oh, hang on a minute.
You're telling me that you're actually pleased that I walked out on that interview? Oh There's no story unless Zari's unhappy.
Why do you think S'more Money was so good for her brand? He cheated on her with her assistant and leaked the photos.
You're her assistant.
Yeah.
Get ready to light up.
Ooh.
Do you think you can say something to make Zari cry? She's usually so guarded.
You know what? I quit.
[S'more Money.]
Thanks for coming, Lord K.
Now, what's your song for the finals? [Lord Knoxacrillion.]
I will wail, as in battle.
Mmm.
Not really sure that's gonna work.
Again.
But listen.
I got this banger I've been working on.
It's sort of like a female empowerment anthem.
On my planet, we do not follow a binary gender construct.
We all carry and bear children.
[S'more Money.]
Perfect.
[chuckles.]
Perfect.
Then you can use the song.
Wha-bam! I am synthesizing 500,000 of Earth supreme vocalists.
I will be king.
[S'more Money.]
Whoa! Hey, this is my dressing room.
Come on now, hey.
What are you up to, you sneaky git? [S'more Money.]
I don't got to tell you guys nothing! You talk or I'll rip that stupid donut off your head and feed you your tender bits.
Okay, okay, okay.
Chill, chill.
I gave Knox and Zari the same song.
He's up first.
No way she can win.
I cannot wait to punch you in the face again.
Me first, please.
What? Can't the pacifist blow off a little steam? [blows.]
I don't want him anywhere near the competition.
Give me a hand.
Our last two contestants are one step closer to taking home the crown.
First to our stage, give a virtual hand for the winner of the gold buzzer, Lord Knoxacrillion! [cheering and applause.]
[woman.]
I love you, Lord Knox! [man.]
So this is what it must feel like to be a king.
I dig it.
- [whispers.]
Zari, listen - [shushes.]
I'm watching the competition.
[cheers and applause.]
[man.]
Uh, you may begin.
[singing.]
I love me, myself and I So hard that I might Die That cheat.
He's singing my song.
Then I resurrect myself No need for a man's help Strong, fierce and free You'll never behead me 'Cause I am a dream Your superstar queen Soaring through the air The real Dragon Girl's here I won't leave you I won't deceive you So bow down and beware The real Dragon Girl's here So bow down and beware The real Dragon Girl's here [crowd cheering.]
[all chanting.]
Lord Knox! Lord Knox! Lord Knox! [chanting continues.]
That wasn't real music.
Tosser couldn't even connect to the lyrics.
Doesn't mean anything.
It means everything, John.
It means we lost.
A finalist who sang a gender-bending diss track? That was everything, and it's going to be a hard act for Zari to follow.
- [exhales.]
- I've gotta know.
Why would you tell your mother that this wouldn't last? What? Is this really the time? Um Yeah.
Because, John, you and I can't even take the first step.
And even if we did, this thing we have is bound to end.
It always does.
[clicks tongue.]
That's usually my line.
I know that I don't deserve to be happy, and I know we'll probably muck this up, all right? But I'm willing to throw the dice.
I want this to be real.
I do.
What do you say? [microphone feedback.]
[singing.]
You spurn my natural emotions You make me feel I'm dirt And I'm hurt And if I start a commotion I run the risk of losing you And that's worse Ever fallen in love with someone Ever fallen in love In love with someone Ever fallen in love In love with someone You shouldn't have fallen In love with I can't see much of a future Unless we find out What's to blame What a shame [upbeat music playing.]
And we won't be together much longer Unless we realize that We are the same [all cheering.]
[both.]
Ever fallen in love with someone Ever fallen in love In love with someone Ever fallen in love In love with someone You shouldn't have fallen In love with Ever fallen in love with someone You shouldn't have fallen In love with [cheering and applause.]
[S'more Money.]
Imposter! [crowd gasping.]
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
What is this? Another trick? [Nate.]
The trick was, S'more Money gave you a song he already gave Zari.
Drama! And still our virtual audience is Cat-Chatting their votes.
[all cheering.]
[S'more Money.]
Get out of my throne! And the new winner is [suspenseful music playing.]
[crowd cheering.]
[exclaims.]
Whoo! Friends, foes and neithers, you have spoken.
Zari Tarazi is the new queen of Da Throne.
[all cheering.]
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
I am your humble servant, Queen Z.
Okay.
[clinking.]
I never doubted you for an instant.
I sure as hell did.
Well, I couldn't have done it without my team.
My fashion guru, Behrad.
Nate on hair, and of course my boyfriend.
Now there's a word to make lesser men wilt.
- Scared? - Terrified.
- Me, too.
- [chuckles.]
- [Nate.]
Mmm, mmm.
- [Behrad.]
Hmm? - Come on.
- What is Whoa, whoa, whoa! - [Behrad.]
Put that thing away.
- Stop that.
Can't you see? He's as small as a grasshopper.
And like one of your grasshoppers, my kind is ancient.
Technology and subterfuge has been key to our survival, my [screams.]
- Why? - [Agent Sharpe.]
Rory! Listen.
I got to thinking.
Sara was smuggled on a ship, we've been searching for the wrong cargo.
We need to find the driver.
The alien called her Kayla.
- You drew that? - I did.
Okay, so we're looking for, um, an alien that looks like she has chicken wings on her face? Uh Yes.
Anyway, we find Kayla, we find Sara.
So what do you think, Cap? Rory, I think that's an excellent idea.
Oh.
Good.
[grunts.]
Space girl, melting away Space girl, gravity betrayed her Space girl, a punk rock treasure You wouldn't happen to be missing an Ava clone from your dinner party, would you? The infamous Sara Lance.
I've been waiting a long time for you.
[electronic music playing.]
Whatever.
[electricity crackling.]
Whatever you want, take it.
- [alien.]
Where is your ruler? - [man.]
What ruler? [beeps.]
[alien.]
"The king defends his throne.
" This is your king.
Where is he? I don't know what you are talking about.
Please Don't kill me.
Yo, that's DJ S'more Money.
That's right.
He used to date Zari Tarazi before she disappeared.
I heard rehab.
[alien.]
Where can I find this S'more Money? Judging some crazy singing competition out in Hollywood.
[alien.]
That is an odd occupation for a king.
But, as is the way, I will challenge him to a death duel.
[theme music playing.]
[punk music playing on record player.]
You spurn my natural emotions [Constantine breathing heavily.]
- Are you hungry? I could cook.
- I'm good.
Why don't you stay the night this time? John - Stop talking.
- Okay.
- [cell phone chimes.]
- Oh.
Wait, what is that sound? The Buzzes.
- Hmm - The Buzzcocks? Oh, come on, it's only one of England's seminal punk rock bands.
Ever fallen in love with someone "Ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn't have fallen in love with?" Aw.
John, are you trying to tell me something? 'Course not.
Unless you're trying to tell me something? - 'Course not.
- Good.
Besides, great music is not just about the lyrics.
It's about the buzz.
The buzz.
The excitement that you get when you play something that's true and real.
[cell phone chimes.]
How many bloody phones do you have? Personal phone and business phone, a phone for all the Persian guys my mom tries to set me up with.
[whooshing.]
- And a phone for emergencies.
- [Behrad.]
It's Les-Lay.
You can open up your eyes, B.
We're decent.
Regrettably.
Zari! I know you told me not to bother you at your yoga retreat, but it's your ex, DJ S'mores.
He was eviscerated by an alien.
Ooh.
Wow, that is a lot to digest.
Yeah, so, I'm thinking, for the funeral, we need a statement dress.
It's his burial, but your red carpet! Bye! [Zari.]
History is literally being made.
DJ S'more Money's death is shattering records for most Cat-Chats in an hour.
The whole world saw it.
Apparently, the alien killed him during a live taping of Da Throne.
Da Throne? In our future, it's a wildly popular singing competition, and is single-handedly keeping network television alive in 2045.
I don't know which is more surprising.
An alien attacking Zari's ex-boyfriend or the fact that network TV still exists.
Gideon, do us a favor and bring up the video for them, will you? [Gideon.]
Smashing! I love an evisceration.
My name is Lord Knoxacrillion, and I am here to slay the king.
[growls.]
[Agent Sharpe.]
Why would one of Sara's pod aliens kill a reality star? Maybe the alien mistook S'more for a real king.
Yeah, and thought that he could usurp marshmallow man's power by offing the bastard.
Okay, so all we have to do is stop an alien from killing a celebrity.
Simple enough.
Let's suit up for La La Land.
- What a load of crap.
- [Constantine.]
Oh Yeah, Mick, uh Shower wouldn't do you wrong, mate.
[clicks tongue.]
Mick, use your words.
This is a spaceship, is it not? Why don't we use it to find Sara? [groans.]
Mick, we have been over this.
The galaxy is hundreds of billions of light years across, okay? One of those displaced aliens is going to lead us to Sara.
You and Spooner are gonna QB.
- Can you show her the ropes, please? - No.
I'm taking the day off.
You're gonna let him talk to you like that? I don't take it personal.
That's just Rory.
Yeah, he's worse than usual.
Sara's absence is really getting to him.
Yeah, I'm sure Sara's absence is really getting to Rory.
- Must be very hard for him, Nate.
- I'm sorry.
We're gonna find her.
I bet Sara's pulling a Thor: Ragnarok and she's kicking some aliens' asses and they're all shouting her name.
Sara! Sara! Sara! Sara! Sara! You have to wake up.
- Sara.
- [rustling.]
Whatever's out there, it's still tracking us.
[whimpers.]
Don't panic, Gary.
This is Sara freaking Lance.
A little Amelia Earhart poison isn't gonna slow you down.
[weakly.]
I I'm too weak, Gary.
I can't fight.
- It's on you.
- Me? I'm no fighter.
Kayla didn't exactly fight Spartacus now, did she? [imitates chomping.]
No, no, absolutely not.
Gary Gary, listen to me.
If I hadn't done unforgiveable things to survive, I never would've made it out the other side.
Now, Ava is my other side.
And I don't care if you have to eat your way through the entire solar system, I am gonna get back to her.
I'm getting back to her.
[announcer.]
The competition is heating up on this year's Da Throne.
With the golden buzzer still in play and the wild card yet to be revealed, anyone could still take the throne.
[crowd cheering.]
[upbeat music playing.]
[cell phone ringing.]
- Mâmân! - That's your ex? [sighs.]
Jealous? Of some life-size S'more who judges some soulless singing competition? Real musicians don't compete to win over the masses with mediocre auto-tuned drivel, love.
Spoken like a former punk guitarist.
- You wanna talk to Mom? - No.
Mâmân, I gotta go.
I love you.
No, I love you more.
Sending you mushes from Hollywood.
Yeah, I'm visiting Zari in Hollywood.
All right.
Every season has a secret celebrity contestant.
What? I read up on the rules.
Last year, President Dwayne Johnson showed up.
And for an old guy, he can still get down.
The Rock's the president? Please tell me John Cena is his chief of staff.
[Agent Sharpe over comms.]
Guys, focus.
We need to find a way into this place.
I got this.
[sighs.]
- Hold, please.
- You're kidding me.
- What? They're designer.
- Oh.
Right.
[exhales deeply.]
Hi! [people chattering excitedly.]
[cameras clicking.]
[announcer.]
Welcome back to Da Throne.
Our next performance starts now! [singing.]
Hand on a wheel I like to stay in control 'Cause I get mine independent My color's silver and gold Chain hang low like fruit from a branch It's a juice avalanche Dripping from my shoulders Down to my pants [woman on PA.]
Saucéy is on stage.
Can we get Hunter Moon to the left wing? - Hey.
- Whoa.
Yeah.
Uh, we really stand out, don't we? You hear that song? It's kind of catchy.
- Look at all this fruit - You want it Make a whole lot ofjuice with that - Fill it in my boots - I got it - Get a champagne flute with that - They see it, yeah, yeah [all cheering.]
Cat-Chat is losing its damn mind over that juicy performance.
What does last year's winner and the king of Da Throne have to say? [S'more Money.]
Sorry, babes, but that was weak.
[crowd groaning.]
Weak? That's not what you said last night.
- You said my fruit was - Whoa! Let's not kiss and tell.
Now, who do we have to the stage next? My! You are big and strong.
You must be our wild card contestant.
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
I am here to challenge the king.
[S'more Money scoffs.]
You and everyone else.
Can we get a hint, lover? Who's under the suit? My name is Lord Knoxacrillion.
And I am here to slay the king.
[Lord Knoxacrillion growls.]
[all cheering.]
DJ, drop that beat! [upbeat music playing.]
[groans.]
[grunting.]
[all cheering.]
[S'more Money.]
That was tight! My man, you are committed.
Wha-bam! [host.]
The gold buzzer? Looks like Lord Knoxacrillion is one step closer to capturing the throne! [S'more Money.]
I don't know how you're gonna top whatever that was.
But if you wanna be the king, figure it out fast, because you're going straight to the finals! [exclaims.]
You're supposed to be showing me the ropes.
Rule number one, stay out of my way.
I'm fresh out of Southern hospitality, so I ain't gonna tiptoe across eggshells like everybody else around here.
Rule number two, this place is like a revolving door.
- Don't unpack.
- Ah.
I see what's going on.
Ava told me you're the last of the original recruits.
I guess I'd be pissy, too, if I was the last OG.
What? Haircut got hitched.
Sara got kidnapped.
And I don't care.
And rule number three I drink on the job.
Guys, meet me in the lab.
The alien's 15 minutes of fame are up.
Um, excuse me, Mr.
Knoxacrillion It is "Lord," flesh-bag.
Oh.
Forgive me, Lord.
It seems that all the finalists have been upgraded to their own exclusive green room.
If you'll just follow me this way.
Mm-hmm.
So, if you would just step right up there.
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
I see no green in this room.
[Nate laughs.]
I told you the Iron Giant wouldn't be a problem.
Okay, the energy in here is way off.
Oh.
Yeah, looks like Spooner took over your den.
She moved my citrine crystal.
- I was manifesting abundance.
- I know.
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
On my planet, we use crystals to Hmm.
You do not have that word.
Procreate.
You know what, Knox? It is factoids like that that really captivate an audience.
Why don't you tell us a little bit more about what you know? Like, do you know where Sara Lance is? Your cardiovascular organ increased to 80 beats per minute when you said "Sara Lance.
" Do you know where Sara Lance is? Yes or no? What is a Sara Lance? Okay, let's try this again, shall we? How did you get to Earth? I was abducted from my home planet.
Eighteen hours ago, my pod crashed in a desert.
Then I woke from stasis to fulfill my prime directive.
Which is? To conquer new planets by challenging their rulers to death duels.
Okay, say you win, you hitch a ride home in like a space cabbie? My inevitable victory will be celebrated with an invasion.
[sighs.]
Picked up the alien vibes from across the ship and look at here, we already kidnapped him.
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
You did not steal me like a whelpling! I followed you here, but I am no prisoner.
- Gideon? - Gideon.
- Oh, um - Gideon! [Gideon.]
Lord Knoxacrillion's superior technology is superior.
Just say the word and I'll blow him to kingdom come.
Impossible! This suit is resistant to even thermonuclear weapons.
If you and your ruler cannot fight with honor, the challenge is canceled.
I will call my armada to invade your planet now.
- What? No, no, no, wait - [Nate.]
Stop We, uh, may be low peons [hesitates.]
but we're honored to explain to you that you got the rules all wrong.
Yeah, Knox.
Can I call you Knox? Listen, bubby.
Death duels isn't what our planet's really about.
Yeah.
Yeah, you see, here on Earth, we compete for the throne via song and dance.
And with those sick vocals, buddy, you're on your way to becoming the new king.
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
Song and dance? More proof you are an immature species.
Very well.
I accept the terms of the challenge.
Bring on Earth's best competitor.
Yes, Dragon Girls! - [Les-Lay.]
Sorry! - Oh! - Sneaky devil, isn't she? - This town's full of them.
Les-Lay, shouldn't you be off running Forbes magazine's - Business of the Year? - Yeah.
Well, we need to talk about Dragonesque, Zari.
Business is tradge.
Even the lip kits aren't selling.
- Everyone has lips.
- Spoken like a true capitalist.
Ignore him.
He thinks dour people have more depths.
You still love fame.
Speaking of, you've been out of the spotlight for too long.
The public doesn't wanna be someone they can't see.
[crunching.]
Cups are edible in 2045.
Eco-friendly is finally in.
Too little too late, if you ask me.
Okay, what about the shareholders? They're going to divest without the face of the company to promote it.
How is this happening? I spent my whole life building this brand.
[Agent Sharpe.]
Long, frustrating story cut short, the alien has to compete for Da Throne.
Nate and Behrad are escorting him to the studio now.
We need a new game plan.
- Aves, do you trust me? - Always, Z.
[S'more Money exhales.]
Look who's back.
Zari T.
Dodged a bullet when the engagement fell through.
Hashtag "blessed"! Um, actually, you're the one who proposed, so 'Cause I thought it would be good for my brand.
Big mistake! - Hey, simmer down, sunshine.
- [S'more Money.]
Who's the blond? [chuckles.]
You know, you Yanks are always behind the eight-ball.
I'm a Master of the Dark Arts, mate, name's Johnny C.
Zari's boyfriend.
Yep.
[S'more Money.]
Dating some Vegas act isn't gonna abracadabra your relevancy back, Zari.
- [laughs.]
- You're over.
You should've never [in Latin.]
Ignis! [S'more Money.]
Now, I'm on top of it Help! Help! Help! Help me! Come on.
No, no, no.
Nobody burn the vodka, that's an accelerant! Get out of my way! Get out of my way! Well, I see the appeal of this celebrity thing.
Hey, Z-Nation.
It's your girl, Zari Tarazi.
So, I have been working on something super top secret, and here it is.
[whispers.]
I'm the wild card.
That's right.
The Dragon Girl is here to claim Da Throne.
[upbeat music playing.]
[announcer.]
Da Throne's played its wild card, superstar Zari Tarazi, facing off against the sisters who can shred for the chance to compete against our golden buzzer winner in the finals.
Everybody wants it, but not everyone has what it takes to win Da Throne.
Friends, foes and neithers, the semifinals are here! Tonight, one contestant will be sent packing.
So, I hope they brought their good Louis.
Who will it be? So, how exactly is Zari throwing her hat in the ring in this circus supposed to put the kibosh on an alien invasion? Uh We're kind of a Swiss Army knife operation.
Every Legend has a utility.
So, when you've got a social influencer from the future, you go with that.
And you hope that being triple threat is still a thing.
Looks like you know how to handle your team.
- Hmm.
- Except Rory.
Yeah, well, he's a special case.
Yeah.
Back home, dealt with guys like him all the time.
You give 'em an inch, they'll take your truck and your virginity.
Next up, we've got the twins who've made K-pop twice as hot, versus this round's wild card, and the king's ex, Zari Tarazi.
It's sure to be spicy! [crowd cheering and applauding.]
[singing.]
Bonjour! Euros, dollars, pounds, yen Everywhere I go balling Paparazzi all on me Shopping spree in Italy Red carpet, world premiere So glamorous, they love to stare Merci beaucoup, enchanté Stunting in my Cartier Merci beaucoup, enchanté Beat face flawless Cash flow like the River Nile Queen, queen, queen, queen, queen Cover story every magazine Queen, queen, queen Merci beaucoup, enchanté Stunting in my Cartier Merci beaucoup, enchanté Bonsoir! [crowd cheering.]
That gave me drama! That gave me life! Now let's get into the results.
Yes! The Dragon Girl took to the skies and into the finals! Guess we know who's the baddest of the bunch.
That's a hell of a way to save the world.
[growls.]
[rustling.]
[woman.]
Hold.
[woman groans.]
[all scream.]
[retching.]
Ava? [belches.]
It's all right, Sara, you can come out now.
Sorry, things got a little out of hand.
You know how it is when you haven't had bone marrow in a while.
Right? Sara? Director Sharpe? [breathes heavily.]
A planet full of Ava clones? No! Why did you taste so good? Z, you were ratings gold, but those votes were a little too close for comfort.
[sighs.]
It's no big deal.
My next performance just needs to be bigger and splashier.
You know, those on-air interviews can really sway an audience.
And Da Throne viewers are suckers for a good love story.
Oh, my God.
- He'll need a new look.
- [gasps.]
[chuckles.]
Yeah, no.
Thanks, love.
I only have the one.
It'll take a little time and a lot of cooperation, but I can work with this.
Your sex appeal is totally going to waste.
And we have to do something about that hair.
Girl, it's a mess.
Whoa.
No, you're not touching my hair.
I'm not being funny.
Listen, this is my favorite jacket.
Don't take that away from me.
[chuckles.]
[cell phone chimes.]
- [man.]
Ma'am, you cannot come back here.
- [speaking Farsi.]
Mâmân? [sighs.]
I saw you on TV.
And I thought surely my daughter would tell me if she was competing on my favorite show.
It was sort of a last-minute thing.
And you're dating a street magician? First a DJ, now a conman? Zari, just because you're old doesn't mean you have to settle.
Okay, not every woman wants to have their first kid at 20.
[in Farsi.]
[in English.]
I love you, too.
Do you really care about that magic man? I will try my best to support you, no matter what.
No, um it won't last.
John is just a fling.
[chuckles.]
Thank goodness.
But, Zari darling, you look tired.
You need a little more makeup.
Where is he? We have to start rolling.
[Constantine exhales heavily.]
Oh, Nate and Behrad know what a girl wants.
You look hot.
Yeah, I look like that tosser, Criss Angel.
Right.
Remember, stick to the talking points pre-approved by Les-Lay.
Chin up.
Smile.
Easy-peasy.
[Les-Lay.]
In three, two, one.
Tonight we're getting all the tea in our exclusive interview with the Dragon Girl, Zari Tarazi.
And she's joined by her mysterious new beau, London street magician Johnny C.
Zari girl, you shocked the world when you entered Da Throne as a wild card after a prolonged absence from the public eye.
The Z-Nation is dying to know, where have you been? Honestly, focusing on self-care.
I've been traveling the world with close friends, visiting historical sites to die for.
It's all been super low-key.
And, Johnny, is that where you enter the picture? [clears throat.]
Yeah, yeah.
I suppose so, mate, yeah.
Oh, my gosh.
Our meet-cute was so romantic.
I was at a snowga retreat on a historically preserved glacier.
And there he was, showing off with his perfect scorpion pose.
[chuckles.]
We fell for each other instantly.
Yeah, that's a very poetic way of putting it.
Oh, my God, he's so modest.
John doesn't like to brag, but he's actually [whispers.]
minor royalty.
Well, now you know I got to ask, will there be wedding bells in the Dragon Girl's future? I mean, Princess Tarazi does have quite the ring to it, right? - It sounds magical.
- [crowd cheering.]
Yeah, you want to see some magic? Watch me disappear.
[crowd gasping.]
Um You know, we had a really long flight.
He's probably just jet-lagged.
[nervous chuckle.]
[all murmuring.]
- Damn it, John.
- That was harsh.
What the hell was that? You know, I could ask you the same thing, couldn't I? What are you talking about? You just embarrassed me in front of the entire world.
Oh, that's all you care about, isn't it? Trending on bloody Chit-Chat.
Cat-Chat.
Admit it.
Come on, you're using this mission to get back on top.
I can save my home and my business.
And let's not pretend like we all haven't been caught up in your personal drama before.
Oh, yeah, I'm a bastard, but at least I admit it.
You'd rather be fake for the cameras than real when it counts.
- This isn't real.
- Oh, yeah? Remember? We are not together.
Just the way we both like it.
You know, it is really difficult to keep straight what's real anymore, but try this one on for size, all right? I am done.
[S'more Money.]
Trouble in paradise? I got just the thing to dry those tears.
An empowerment anthem.
Something for all the ladies out there.
Because after all, you wouldn't want the Z-Nation thinking some amateur magician clipped the Dragon Girl's wings now, would you? [sighs.]
[Sara breathing heavily.]
[groans.]
Ava, wait.
Slow down.
Where are we, babe? [door opens.]
After you.
[both grunting.]
- You think I don't know my own Ava? - [chokes.]
Gentle beings, we are joined by Lord Knoxacrillion.
If this interview goes anything like the last one, you can expect some bombshells.
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
I detect no explosives in the vicinity.
[laughs.]
That dry wit.
That's what Da Throne fans are loving about you.
But here's the million-dollar question.
Where on Earth did you come from? I am not from Earth.
I am from the planet Arkana.
[host.]
Oh, really? What do you think of your competition, the Dragon Girl, Zari Tarazi? That's an alien.
Unless she's spouting real fire, she does not stand a chance.
Feisty.
So, what made you enter Da Throne? Why haven't we caught him? We did.
It's complicated.
I was ambushed by a gangster feared all over the galaxy.
You would say she has a face with chicken wings on it.
Her name was Kayla.
- Gideon.
- [Gideon.]
Yes, Mr.
Rory.
Uncloak.
Initiate Matador's Last Strike.
What the hell are you doing, Rory? Last of the OG's picked up on a few secret commands.
You can't just fire on Hollywood.
- Watch me.
- [Gideon.]
Activating weapons systems.
[beeping.]
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
Foolish humans.
You think that is a threat? [Gideon.]
Shall I prepare to fire? - Yes.
- No! Die, you alien scum.
[clicking.]
Incoming! [Gideon.]
I am detecting alien battleships entering the Earth's atmosphere.
[alarm blaring.]
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
Fire on me and your ship will be destroyed.
Try another trick and the invasion will begin.
[alarm continues blaring.]
Rory, what the hell did you do? Uh The Earth was screwed anyway.
Mick, we need to talk, okay? [gun powering up.]
What, you're gonna shoot me? What the hell is wrong with you? If you were kidnapped by aliens, Sara would have found you by now.
[scoffs.]
You know what, you're right.
I wish I was the one taken, but I wasn't.
And I am sick of your bad attitude and your drinking and your lack of personal hygiene, okay? What would Lita say? She's at college.
- That's great.
- No, it's not.
She never returns my calls.
When she does, she's always whispering or she's at some party and there are [sighs.]
boys in the background.
Mick, just because Lita's busy, it doesn't mean she doesn't love you anymore.
Okay? It just means she doesn't need you.
But I need you.
Sara's missing.
It isn't just hard for you.
So get yourself together, okay? Or get the hell off my ship.
[exhales deeply.]
Hello, my old friend.
- Oh, bollocks! - [laughs.]
I'm sorry, did I scare you? Oh, my God.
You're smoking? Yeah, yeah, don't tell me in 2045 it's illegal.
Yes, but it's perfect.
It totally plays up the whole bad boy image you've got going on.
Cat-Chat went crazy when you dissed Z.
Oh, hang on a minute.
You're telling me that you're actually pleased that I walked out on that interview? Oh There's no story unless Zari's unhappy.
Why do you think S'more Money was so good for her brand? He cheated on her with her assistant and leaked the photos.
You're her assistant.
Yeah.
Get ready to light up.
Ooh.
Do you think you can say something to make Zari cry? She's usually so guarded.
You know what? I quit.
[S'more Money.]
Thanks for coming, Lord K.
Now, what's your song for the finals? [Lord Knoxacrillion.]
I will wail, as in battle.
Mmm.
Not really sure that's gonna work.
Again.
But listen.
I got this banger I've been working on.
It's sort of like a female empowerment anthem.
On my planet, we do not follow a binary gender construct.
We all carry and bear children.
[S'more Money.]
Perfect.
[chuckles.]
Perfect.
Then you can use the song.
Wha-bam! I am synthesizing 500,000 of Earth supreme vocalists.
I will be king.
[S'more Money.]
Whoa! Hey, this is my dressing room.
Come on now, hey.
What are you up to, you sneaky git? [S'more Money.]
I don't got to tell you guys nothing! You talk or I'll rip that stupid donut off your head and feed you your tender bits.
Okay, okay, okay.
Chill, chill.
I gave Knox and Zari the same song.
He's up first.
No way she can win.
I cannot wait to punch you in the face again.
Me first, please.
What? Can't the pacifist blow off a little steam? [blows.]
I don't want him anywhere near the competition.
Give me a hand.
Our last two contestants are one step closer to taking home the crown.
First to our stage, give a virtual hand for the winner of the gold buzzer, Lord Knoxacrillion! [cheering and applause.]
[woman.]
I love you, Lord Knox! [man.]
So this is what it must feel like to be a king.
I dig it.
- [whispers.]
Zari, listen - [shushes.]
I'm watching the competition.
[cheers and applause.]
[man.]
Uh, you may begin.
[singing.]
I love me, myself and I So hard that I might Die That cheat.
He's singing my song.
Then I resurrect myself No need for a man's help Strong, fierce and free You'll never behead me 'Cause I am a dream Your superstar queen Soaring through the air The real Dragon Girl's here I won't leave you I won't deceive you So bow down and beware The real Dragon Girl's here So bow down and beware The real Dragon Girl's here [crowd cheering.]
[all chanting.]
Lord Knox! Lord Knox! Lord Knox! [chanting continues.]
That wasn't real music.
Tosser couldn't even connect to the lyrics.
Doesn't mean anything.
It means everything, John.
It means we lost.
A finalist who sang a gender-bending diss track? That was everything, and it's going to be a hard act for Zari to follow.
- [exhales.]
- I've gotta know.
Why would you tell your mother that this wouldn't last? What? Is this really the time? Um Yeah.
Because, John, you and I can't even take the first step.
And even if we did, this thing we have is bound to end.
It always does.
[clicks tongue.]
That's usually my line.
I know that I don't deserve to be happy, and I know we'll probably muck this up, all right? But I'm willing to throw the dice.
I want this to be real.
I do.
What do you say? [microphone feedback.]
[singing.]
You spurn my natural emotions You make me feel I'm dirt And I'm hurt And if I start a commotion I run the risk of losing you And that's worse Ever fallen in love with someone Ever fallen in love In love with someone Ever fallen in love In love with someone You shouldn't have fallen In love with I can't see much of a future Unless we find out What's to blame What a shame [upbeat music playing.]
And we won't be together much longer Unless we realize that We are the same [all cheering.]
[both.]
Ever fallen in love with someone Ever fallen in love In love with someone Ever fallen in love In love with someone You shouldn't have fallen In love with Ever fallen in love with someone You shouldn't have fallen In love with [cheering and applause.]
[S'more Money.]
Imposter! [crowd gasping.]
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
What is this? Another trick? [Nate.]
The trick was, S'more Money gave you a song he already gave Zari.
Drama! And still our virtual audience is Cat-Chatting their votes.
[all cheering.]
[S'more Money.]
Get out of my throne! And the new winner is [suspenseful music playing.]
[crowd cheering.]
[exclaims.]
Whoo! Friends, foes and neithers, you have spoken.
Zari Tarazi is the new queen of Da Throne.
[all cheering.]
[Lord Knoxacrillion.]
I am your humble servant, Queen Z.
Okay.
[clinking.]
I never doubted you for an instant.
I sure as hell did.
Well, I couldn't have done it without my team.
My fashion guru, Behrad.
Nate on hair, and of course my boyfriend.
Now there's a word to make lesser men wilt.
- Scared? - Terrified.
- Me, too.
- [chuckles.]
- [Nate.]
Mmm, mmm.
- [Behrad.]
Hmm? - Come on.
- What is Whoa, whoa, whoa! - [Behrad.]
Put that thing away.
- Stop that.
Can't you see? He's as small as a grasshopper.
And like one of your grasshoppers, my kind is ancient.
Technology and subterfuge has been key to our survival, my [screams.]
- Why? - [Agent Sharpe.]
Rory! Listen.
I got to thinking.
Sara was smuggled on a ship, we've been searching for the wrong cargo.
We need to find the driver.
The alien called her Kayla.
- You drew that? - I did.
Okay, so we're looking for, um, an alien that looks like she has chicken wings on her face? Uh Yes.
Anyway, we find Kayla, we find Sara.
So what do you think, Cap? Rory, I think that's an excellent idea.
Oh.
Good.
[grunts.]
Space girl, melting away Space girl, gravity betrayed her Space girl, a punk rock treasure You wouldn't happen to be missing an Ava clone from your dinner party, would you? The infamous Sara Lance.
I've been waiting a long time for you.
[electronic music playing.]