Bones s06e04 Episode Script

2 So, I've been a freegan for about a year now.
In fact, if Al Gore really cared about the environment he'd live out of Dumpsters.
- You should, like, totally be in charge of the earth.
- Don't I know it.
This is a primo Dumpster.
Two restaurants and a convenience store use it.
You're the only person I've ever brought here.
Nobody's taken me out to dinner in, like, forever.
We are gonna indulge in a freegan feast, milady.
- Hop in.
- Okay.
Ooh.
Fact "best before" dates are just marketing tools to increase profits and make more garbage to feed the corporate monster.
Oh, look! Eggs! And some apples.
Just eat around the bruised part.
Mmm.
This is like throwing out a baby.
I feel so close to you right now.
Oh! Look at all the yogurt.
And the veggies.
Wait a minute.
Do you smell that? There's something choice down there.
You learn to recognize scents, like a wine guy.
- Mmm.
- Could be meat.
Fact if you cook it through, it's fine.
Mmm.
It's meat.
Hmm.
The perfect murder? I'm a forensic anthropologist.
It would be odd if I didn't consider the perfect murder.
First consideration complete annihilation of the body.
No body, no murder.
Perfect.
Why are we talking about this? My car.
I choose the topic of conversation.
Also, my car achieves excellent gas mileage.
Currently 51 miles per gallon.
Okay.
You win.
So, let's talk about the perfect murder.
Of course, at this point, I'm simply being theoretical.
What do you mean, "at this point"? Well, there are so many variables in a person's life it would be irrational to completely rule out the possibility of murdering someone.
No, it's not.
You say "I'm never gonna murder someone.
" I don't believe in absolutes.
Scary.
You know what? You're really scaring me right now.
Because you know that if I did commit murder, you'd never be able to catch me.
I could catch you.
No.
My plan is foolproof.
Oh, now it's an actual plan? Now, this is a good place to dispose of a body.
The trash men they come every other day, then it's off to the landfill, body never to be seen.
- Perhaps.
- There is no perfect murder.
It's chance and luck.
My plan is perfect.
If you can plan the perfect murder, so can I.
I can too.
Yeah.
Okay.
What's this? That's it? This is everything we found in the Dumpster - The head and hands.
- Who found it? - A couple of Dumpster divers.
- Dumpster divers.
The prominent glabella suggests the victim is male.
Whoa.
Hodgins is gonna love that.
Okay, what is that, some kind of a bird's nest? It's the victim's hair.
Wow.
Okay, was he scalped? The teeth have been shattered, most likely in an effort to obfuscate identity.
You know, a Dumpster will cause a guy to decompose pretty good too.
You should keep that in mind when you plan your own murder.
Anything I should know, Seeley? No, Camille.
I'll need you to separate out all fragments of remains from the refuse.
- You think the rest of him's in here? - I doubt it.
Based on the striations on the distal end of the ulna it's clear the hands were sawed off.
Overall, I must say this was a well-conceived method for disposal.
Right.
Is that how you would do it? I'm sorry.
I can't share my murder plans with you.
- Why? - You are dating a journalist.
If, in a postcoital haze, you relayed my method she might print it for killers everywhere to see.
Right.
Because, you know, dismemberment and murder is my topic of conversation after sex.
There is something unusual about the phalanges, Dr.
Brennan.
Flattened exostosis on the first metacarpal and proximal phalanx.
- That? Even I know what that is.
- You do? Yeah.
Old Army Ranger buddy of mine had the same injury.
He got it from shooting a Desert Eagle handgun.
- You think he's military? - No, but victim definitely had a thing for big guns.
The evidence is consistent with your theory.
That's right.
You see? 'Cause I always get my man.
I am a woman.
Dr.
Brennan? Yes, Dr.
Saroyan? Is this a good time to interrupt? Since you've already interrupted me, I think it's the best possible time to interrupt.
Good.
I want to introduce you to someone.
- Who? - Before I tell you his name I want you to understand that he is, in fact, very well-educated with several advanced degrees.
Why does he look like that? Because he's "the Science Dude.
" Professor Bunsen Jude, the Science Dude? I don't know what that means.
Uh, he's got his own kids' science show on TV about science The Science Dude.
As I am no longer a child, I don't really watch those.
Dr.
Brennan, I am Professor Bunsen Jude, the Science Dude.
I'm very happy to meet you.
I hope we can be friends.
Nice to meet you, Dude.
Amazing.
The professor has a proposition for you.
Ah, yes.
I would like to shoot a special episode of my show here in your lab, with you as my very special science guest.
No.
Dr.
Brennan, this would be very good for the Jeffersonian.
The Jeffersonian is over a century and a half old.
I doubt my appearance on a mere children's show will have much effect.
Dr.
Brennan, my show is not "mere.
" Do you have any idea how many children I have introduced to the world of science? No.
Oh.
Millions and millions.
I am a serious scientist.
I hold degrees in astrophysics, anatomy, chemistry and economics.
Children are not rigorous when it comes to empirical inquiry.
They mostly enjoy bad smells and loud noises.
Well, who doesn't like that? - I'm sorry, Professor.
- All right.
Wait, wait.
What How about I prove myself to you? I'll assist you in this case.
If I'm useful, then you do my show.
Dr.
Brennan, you could use a second pair of eyes.
We happen to be squintern-free.
There you go.
I will be your squintern.
All right.
Ha, ha! Okay.
Amazing! What do you observe? Ah.
Uh-oh.
Well, uh This is a cut-off head those are hands, and that there's his hair.
Perhaps I should have specified that you tell me something pertinent.
May I? Oh, God.
Okay.
As you can see from the deltoid appearance this tells us this is not head hair.
Oh, God.
You mean it's What? From No, no.
No.
That would really be a lot.
I think it's-it's head hair, but it's not from the top of the head.
It's from his, uh, chin and cheeks.
Dude is correct.
A beard.
That's better than It's all right to vomit, Dude.
When science gets icky, it's all right to be si Wow.
Mean-looking.
What's really scary, though, is that there's somebody out there even worse who cut off his head and hands.
One little detail this hair.
Not from his head.
It's his beard.
Ah.
No problemo.
Okay.
Voilà.
Okay.
Well, let's get this to Booth see if anyone's missing this guy.
- Mr.
Gering? - Yeah.
Greg Gering, Gering Bail Bonds.
Yeah, right.
Yeah.
Look at that.
I recognize you from all those billboards I see all over the place, yeah.
My people tell me you can identify this missing person.
Yeah.
This is Ray Ray Kaminski a.
k.
a.
Wolf.
Wolf? Ah.
You guys put up bail for him? No.
Wolf is one of the good guys.
Or almost a good guy.
He's a skip tracer.
Bounty hunter.
Fully licensed, very experienced.
One of my best.
You sure he's dead? Oh, yeah.
Hard to believe somebody got the drop on the Wolf.
- Uh, was he after anyone in particular? - Yep.
Nutcase named Charles Braverman indicted for the murder of a coworker.
Here.
Jammed a mechanical pencil through the guy's eye for singing show tunes at his desk.
Guy looks like an accountant.
He's 5'7", only 142 pounds.
Charles Manson was 5'2".
Jeffrey Dahmer couldn't bench-press his own weight.
You've been in this business as long as I have you come to judge how dangerous a man is by the size of his bail.
- How much? - Million bucks.
That's why I sent my best guy after him.
The Wolf.
Well, thanks for these.
Those are for you.
You can maybe hand them out to everybody you arrest.
Why would I do that? Because I am the picture of cooperation.
Provided you with a murder suspect.
Excuse me.
Dr.
Hodgins? Yeah? Whoa! Professor Bunsen Jude, the Science Dude? Hey, man, it is an honor to meet you.
Thank you.
Dr.
Brennan sent me to Observe, analyze Deduce.
No offense, Dr.
Hodgins, but you're a little older than my usual viewers.
When I was in college, we used to have this drinking game.
Every time you said the word "amazing," we'd Well, anyway, I'm very familiar with your work.
I'm pitching in to help Dr.
Brennan.
She sent me to see if you found anything out from the beard.
- Yucky.
- Yeah.
So, observe.
Insects, various mineral particulates, mucus.
Bugs, dirt, snot.
Is that blood? Analyze.
It's barbecue sauce.
More specifically, a vinegar-and-tomato-based sauce most commonly found in western Virginia.
You're thinking you can trace his location before he passed away from the clues in his beard.
Yes, I do.
Deduce! Amazing! Listen, why don't you want to do a kids' show? - It's a waste of my time.
- It's a science show.
Kids' science.
Parker loves that show.
He's always watching it.
He's always shouting out that slogan "Ready, aim, fire!" "Observe, analyze, deduce.
" The whole point with the kids' show is that you have an opportunity to, you know, brainwash a bunch of normal kids into geeks, you know? Future squints.
- I'd be more likely to scare them away.
- What? People should stick to their strengths.
Well, you know, people should expand.
I mean, expansion is good.
They should grow.
You believe in evolution, right? If I didn't, I'd have to believe that early humans coexisted with dinosaurs.
To believe that, I'd have to be dimwitted.
Ah, cavemen fought the Tyrannosaurus rex.
That's a fact.
I can't tell if you're joking.
I hope you are.
Oh, it's Angela.
Hello? Hodgins and that Dr.
Amazing - Uh, Angela means Science Dude.
- Yeah, they ran an analysis on the contents of the victim's beard.
The beard? Why the beard? It was full of stuff.
- "Stuff"? - Could you be more specific? Okay.
Well, there were needles from the red spruce which means that he was at an altitude higher than 4,300 feet.
And the leg from a rare bug called the emerald ash borer.
How rare is that? Rare enough that, when it's combined with altitude and a not-so-secret barbecue sauce made by Ollie's B-B-Q in western Virginia you're left with a half-mile stretch off the 250 highway where the victim had to be shortly before being killed.
That's very good work, Angela.
Thank you.
Yeah.
- You're going to need Tutti for this one.
- Tutti? If there's a dead body out here, Tutti will find it.
Maybe Tutti's gotten smart, right, and realized it's best just to avoid dead body smell altogether.
I mean, this body could be in bits, right? - Could be.
- All we found were the head and the hands.
- Somebody trying to make it harder to identify the victim? - Uh-huh.
Yeah.
That's Okay.
So that's it for Tutti? - That's all she got? - No.
That's how Tutti indicates.
You dig there, you'll find human body parts, or my name isn't Maggie Maggregor.
Now who's lying down where those murder body parts are parked, huh? Who's lying down? Maybe you can get her to dig too? Headless, handless.
Right stage of decomposition.
I'd say you found the rest of our victim.
Yeah, more bones for Bones to work on.
Excuse me.
What in God's name are you people planting up here at this time of year? What are you doin' here? These agents are surveilling a cabin just over there and reported suspicious activity.
A moldering dead body counts as suspicious.
These are most likely the remains of a bounty hunter named Ray Kaminski.
Bounty hunter? By any chance, was he in pursuit of a fugitive named Charles Braverman? Yeah.
He's out on bail for murder.
Looks like the bounty hunter chased Braverman out to his cabin and Braverman took him out.
It gets worse.
Braverman's wife was slated to be a material witness against her husband.
- "Was"? - She's gone missing.
That's why we put that place under surveillance.
Too late, it appears.
Maybe there are two bodies out here.
No, I scoured this whole area with Tutti you know, the cadaver dog.
Well, all we can do is hope that Molly Braverman is out there somewhere hiding from her homicidal maniac husband.
- I'll find her for you.
- Ah, chéri.
I love it when you sing that song.
Phew.
All right, everyone, are we wearing our masks and gloves? Health and safety first.
Really? That's how you roll? All right.
Human remains rotted.
The medical term that describes the condition of this flesh is? Anybody? Anybody? Yes? Uh, it's "gooey.
" Good.
That's not exactly what I was looking for.
Decomposed due to autolysis.
The destruction of cells as a result of an aseptic chemical process.
Amazing! But you had me at "decomposed.
" Okay.
Okay.
Ask something else.
I'd like to know how this person died.
Dr.
Saroyan is the boss.
We must always respect our superiors.
And our mom and dad.
That's why I tell kids to ask first before removing simple household items when doing an experiment.
Cause of death.
All right.
Well And there it is.
The cause of death.
- Just like that? - Yes.
Bowing inward fracture.
Fracture lines indicating high-velocity trauma, most likely a gunshot.
You'd throw it to a cartoon now, right? To explain velocity? Captain Speedy falling off the cliff explaining velocity is the rate of change of displacement with time.
I love Captain Speedy! The trajectory is a straight shot to the heart fatal.
Which is sad but amazing.
Amazing.
So Braverman and Molly were high school sweethearts.
- No reports of spousal abuse.
- So? He was considered a martinet at the workplace control freak.
Not at home? More likely, Molly successfully subjugated her own personality and desires to her husband.
Then why did she agree to testify against him? - A chance to be free.
- Free? - She's free now.
- Yeah, but she won't be on her own.
I mean, she's not prepared to cope.
Okay.
So we're looking for someone who took her in a friend or a family member? No.
She won't have any friends.
Braverman wouldn't have allowed it.
- Sweets.
- Yeah.
Not by herself, not with a friend.
Then what's left? Surrogates.
- People who have babies for other people? - No, no, no.
Someone that she comes into contact with in a formal way, like an employee.
Oh, right.
Or like a housekeeper or a tax adviser or personal trainer? Yes, exactly.
Look for someone that she overcompensates or, uh, utilizes more often than she needs to.
- - Dude, Dr.
Saroyan tells me that you determined cause of death.
Keen observation and careful thought are traits that are as valuable as kindness, understanding and compassion.
Much more valuable actually.
Well, I try to promote all the traits which make for a good citizen.
I agree that substantial damage has been done to this rib.
Do you have an explanation for the fact that the two sides of the rib fail to match? - I missed something? - The two sides of the fracture.
There's a gap of at least seven millimeters which is unaccounted for.
I missed it entirely, but there's no shame in making a mistake.
If you're a child.
But here that kind of carelessness could lead to a murderer escaping.
And as the old adage goes, if at first you don't succeed you pick yourself up and, ignoring all the doomsayers and mopey-dopes you try again.
Amazing.
Now the only component that's evading us is a bullet that caused this injury.
No.
That is not the only component evading us.
What have we got? I've asked Angela to create a reenactment of the victim's death.
I'm just inputting the data now.
Professor Jude turned out to be quite impressive, didn't he? If you're six years old.
A kind mind is a fine mind.
It just That stuff gets into your head and - Go, Angela.
- As you can see the victim was struck in the left fourth rib with a blow that was powerful enough not only to fracture the rib, but also dislodge a portion of the bone.
Dude found a fragment of the rib.
My theory is that the fragment was propelled forward and shot into the heart, thus killing him.
So, he wasn't killed by a bullet, but by a piece of his own rib? - There's no indication of the weapon being a bullet.
- What did the rib damage? I hate to be the one to suggest this, but this might be the perfect time for Hodgins and the Science Dude to join forces.
Bring merriment to your experiment.
I just made that one up myself.
Molly Braverman saw her hairdresser twice a week.
That's a lot.
That's exactly what Sweets said we should look for.
We talked to the hairdresser, and get this Molly asked if she could stay at the hairdresser's house for a few days.
- You don't seem pleased.
- Ah, you know well, the hairdresser said I was the second F.
B.
I.
agent who called.
So, you know, I checked in with Caroline, and nobody else followed the hairdresser lead.
Wh Braverman? That's exactly what I thought, but it was a woman who called.
Yes? F.
B.
I.
F.
B.
I.
Special Agent Seeley Booth.
This here is Dr.
Temperance Brennan from the Jeffersonian.
- Can we talk to you for a minute? - I'm sorry.
This isn't a good time.
Mrs.
Braverman, we have reason to believe that you're in danger.
Your husband may have discovered where you are and What is it? Something wrong? Booth, It's Braverman.
Stay inside and lock the door.
Hey, hey! Hey! Whoa, whoa, whoa! Whoa! Watch it! Can't you see I'm running? Are you kiddin' me, lady? Whoa, ho-oh! Whoa, whoa, whoa! Stay down, Bones.
Stay down.
Booth, she's got a shotgun.
Bones! Hey! Whoa, whoa, whoa! Easy, easy.
Thanks a lot, idiot! You just cost me 200 grand.
I need another damn bounty hunter.
Come on, we're in your castle.
We're all on the same side.
- How about losing these stupid bracelets? - On the same side? You assaulted a federal agent.
He didn't identify himself as such.
Besides, he's a big boy.
It's not like he can't handle a love tap or two.
A wanted fugitive escaped because of your interference, so have a seat.
Look, let me go, and I'll get Braverman back for you.
If Braverman hurts or kills anyone else because you prevented his arrest, I'll charge you as an accessory.
I'm sorry, but I've been chasing this guy for 17 days now.
It's the thrill of the chase, right? You know what I mean.
Come on.
Wow, you're actually letting me go.
Well, thrill of the chase.
You get it, right? Get out of here before I change my mind.
What'd you do that for? Double the pressure on Braverman.
I don't care who gets him first.
I hate it when you're all adult and sensible.
Give me a little bile and revenge.
That's what I appreciate in a man.
What? Human ribs can withstand approximately 400 pounds of force before breaking.
Now, ribs 1 through 3 are the hardest with 4 through 9 getting progressively weaker.
Our victim was a large man with big muscles and dense bones.
I never thought of using paint stir sticks in place of ribs.
Many common household items mimic the properties of human body parts like cantaloupe melons or pudding.
I'm not gonna ask about the pudding.
Start slowly and work our way up? Professor.
Thank you.
Ready? Captain Speedy would say the speed would give us velocity and force.
Wow.
It's 56 miles per hour, which is 25.
3 meters per second.
- That's not enough.
- All right.
Ooh.
How about a slingshot with a golf ball? Ready? Wow! Ribs are really tough.
- Give or take.
- Science is fun.
Yeah! But we do have a responsibility to the truth.
- Yeah.
- And the truth is whatever hit this big, tough man's ribs made a piece fly off.
Should we step this thing up a magnitude or two? Amazing! Sweets Oh.
Hey, how are you? Listen, I need your help.
- I'm in a session.
- No, no, no, no.
Listen, I'm dealing with a dangerous fugitive here.
You understand, don't you? I need your brain to help me figure out what his next move's gonna be.
No, no, no, no.
I still got 20 minutes left here, then I'm all yours.
Oh, ho! No, no, no! Twenty minutes is not gonna work, all right? Two minutes.
Not a second more.
Listen, whatever your problem is, trust me Sweets here can fix it in two minutes.
Two minutes.
Let's go.
Let's go.
Come on.
Okay.
Well, deciding to change genders is a monumental decision in and of itself.
So why don't we take the weekend to reflect on that and then we'll f-figure out what the next steps will be.
Sound good? Yeah.
Yeah.
Hey.
You have to go on the Dude's kiddie show.
No, I don't.
Why? Because it's the dream of every kid in this country who likes science even a little bit.
Well, I'm not a kid.
I'm a fully grown adult.
Okay.
Then do it for your inner child.
If you're referring to a fetus I, unlike you, am not currently pregnant.
Sweetie, you go on this show and millions of little girls are going to look at you and say to themselves, "I can be like her.
" A scientist or an astronaut or a brain surgeon blah-de-blah.
You know, shoot for the stars all that.
Even with the "blah-de-blah," it seems very important to you.
Yeah.
If I have a daughter, I'm going to name her Temperance.
You are? I mean, we won't call her that.
It's awful.
Maybe it'll be her middle name.
But I want her to love you.
You love me.
Yes.
But not everyone is as willing to look as hard for your inner child as I am.
And this kid is half Hodgins, remember? Listen, if the Science Dude makes it all the way through this case helpful or not, I think that you should cut him a break and go on his show.
Yeah.
And I lost you.
No.
No, you haven't.
I am an excellent multitasker.
I need the Dude.
Oh.
Okay.
Dude! Dude! Coming! I'm coming! Yeah? You are on.
Dazzle.
Dude, what do you see here? Ribs.
Broken ribs.
Could you be more specific? Okay.
This is a magnification of the fourth left rib so it's big and our eyes can see things that are usually too tiny for the human eye.
And right here where it's a little bumpy and weird that's where the bone started to heal.
- Remodeling? - Yes, which means this rib was broken before this man was killed.
Amazing! This injury occurred perhaps a week before the victim was killed.
Whatever made him die was not the same thing that broke his rib.
There were two injuries: one that broke off a piece of the rib And another approximately a week later which propelled the bone into his heart and killed him dead.
Well, "killed him dead" is redundant.
But it's clear.
And what do we say about clarity? "It's a barbarity that clarity is a rarity.
" That's very true.
Okay, what am I looking at here? You know that myth where some Good Samaritan anonymously sends in evidence that cracks the case? - That never happens.
- It happened.
- That's the victim, isn't it? - Yeah.
He's playing pool with his boss, the bail bondsman.
So what? Here we go.
Slight disagreement between gentlemen.
Does he really think that wig is fooling anyone? - He's terminal.
- What? Cancer.
The diagnosis isn't good.
Oh, wow! Okay, at least we know how he cracked his rib.
- Gotta give the little guy credit for guts.
- Someone thinks he's gonna die he takes risks he might otherwise avoid.
Yeah.
Or he just goes crazy.
The Wolf cheated.
He called the wrong shot.
There was money at stake.
I did what I had to do.
Yeah, so you cracked him in the ribs? I protested in a vigorous fashion.
We put it behind us.
I didn't track him down and kill him later.
Maybe he wasn't so forgiving.
Maybe he felt embarrassed that an old man in a bad wig made him look like a fool.
- Right.
So he comes after you.
- You protest again, even more vigorously by which I mean you chop off his head.
Look! You people Guys like me and the Wolf, we're not lawyers.
We don't talk things through.
The Wolf once took a shot at me because I complimented his mother in a way he didn't appreciate.
Guys like you, you get older, you get weak, maybe you overcompensate? I'm still kickin'.
Thanks, sonny.
You're wearing that wig because of chemotherapy.
You are going to die, sir, within the next year.
Doctor says more like six months.
And it's none of your business, but I believe in God and I would like to make a good impression when I stand before him.
Make up for what, about a hundred assault convictions? Assault in the course of my chosen profession.
No aggravated assault, no killing anybody.
If I were you, I'd be asking why Janet LeBlanc sent you that security tape.
Oh, what? The other bounty hunter? She's the only one who would benefit.
Why would one of your own bounty hunters want to incriminate you? Because she wants you wasting your time on me while she finds Braverman.
Mission accomplished.
- You're being pretty damn helpful.
Isn't he? - Mm-hmm.
If you get to Braverman first I don't have to pay out 200 large.
Which is why I'll play this for you.
Charlie, tell me where you are , and I'll come right away.
Is that Molly Braverman? No, I promise.
The F.
B.
I.
had no idea I was hiding you.
What'd you do, duplicate the SIM card on her cell? No need.
They got an app for that.
Give me that.
I can meet you at the corner of 21st and Scott in 30 minutes.
Okay, that recording was made an hour and a half ago.
I contacted the officers who were assigned to protect Molly, and she's already gone.
What kind of woman runs away with a man whom she knows to be a murderer? I should have known.
She's so used to being controlled, she can't live without it.
I don't care about why.
The question is where.
Where are they? Right here.
Okay, the intersection where they planned to meet is right here.
Now, if Molly was driving No, no, no.
He would have taken over once they got together.
- How could you possibly know that? - Well, since she's willing to accept the fact that her husband killed a man it suggests that she's a submissive and compliant woman.
So, where do you think they'll go? Okay, this is ludicrous.
Sweets can't possibly know that.
Actually, I can.
What I'm doing here, it's no less precise than profiling a suspect.
See, this meeting place is not random.
It's right off the 66 interstate.
From here, Braverman will head west.
Now you're psychic? Eighty-seven percent of all people escaping head west.
I know.
It's one of those bizarre psychological truths.
It's like, uh, circling clockwise when you're staking out a house.
Even the Dude would call that pseudoscience.
Credit card records show past reservations at campgrounds at Walker State Park and Fremont State Park.
Yeah.
They would want a familiar place where they feel secure.
Both west of here, by the way.
Just Okay, well, then the fastest route here is between the 66 and 81.
I'll buy it, especially since we don't have anything else.
- He won't make it to the 81.
- Now who's psychic? When Braverman rolled off the car, he landed flat-footed.
From that height, and the speed he was going he must have dislocated his femoral head from his acetabular.
No, it couldn't be that bad.
He's been running ever since.
Once he's in the car and immobile his adrenaline will wear off, and the pain will become unbearable.
He'll need drugs and medical care.
- You don't think he'd be stupid enough to go to a hospital? - He won't have a choice.
I'll contact all the hospitals and the urgent care facilities along the route.
Nothing? You've found nothing? We have tried everything we could think of.
The problem is, projectiles either bounce off the rib crack it or fragment it into several pieces.
But nothing knocked out one small fragment? It's like I told the Science Dude, we need something that strikes at more than but less than 70 meters per second.
Which translates to? Faster than a golf ball hit with a 3-iron, but slower than a rubber bullet.
Oh, good Lord.
I think I'm onto something.
Whoa! You made a bazooka! If you mean potato bazooka, then yes.
P.
V.
C.
tube.
Commercial hair spray as an accelerant.
Hold and load.
Man.
I haven't shot a potato gun since I was a kid.
Is this in any way safe? Strictly 18 and over, so I am completely out of my comfort zone.
Okay.
Loaded and ready.
Professor.
Thank you.
Spuds away! Wow.
So that's 62.
5 meters per second give or take.
Let's check the playback on that.
Eureka! I see that your results are congruent with what happened but are we really saying that our victim was killed by a potato gun? Oh, it's Hodgins.
Hey, Hodgins, you got a weapon for us? It's a potato gun.
Did you get that thesis from the Dude? That would be correct.
- Okay, murder by vegetable? - Well, not literally.
Murder by something that approximates the speed force and velocity of a potato.
A blunt, malleable projectile moving at a relatively slow speed.
That is very good work.
Ah, but good enough that you will agree to appear on my show? Yes.
- Oh, excuse us.
- I got it, I got it.
- Yeah, it's Booth.
- This is Agent Clansnick.
McArthur Hospital off the 66 just reported a couple male and female- male with a dislocated leg.
- Were they carrying any potatoes? - Excuse me? No, we're eight miles out.
We're on our way.
- What do you want to do? - Well, what I want to do, I'm gonna find a doctor who'll find him and pump him with enough morphine to stun an elephant.
Well, physicians can't do that.
It's against the Hippocratic oath.
"First, do no harm.
" Right.
I'm just saying.
- She followed us.
- Hey! Janet.
Ja-Ja-Janet! Janet! Ja Braverman's mine, G-man.
It's gonna be okay, okay? There you go.
- There's another way around.
This way.
- Okay.
- Pretty hard to find.
- Look.
There.
Okay, let's go.
Come on.
I'm gonna go back the other way.
All right.
Run, Charles.
I got her! Get out of my way.
Janet! No, wait! - Drop the weapon.
- Relax, G-man.
He's fine.
It's only a beanbag gun.
Drop it now.
I got the guy.
Bounty is mine.
On your knees.
Now! He's officially mine.
Booth.
Bones, you okay? Where's Molly? She's incapacitated.
Most likely for the next six to eight hours.
Hey, Bones, do you think that a potato gun and a beanbag gun could generate the same Fig Newtons per square inch? It's just "newtons," Booth.
Yes, I-I think they could be very similar.
Why? The bounty hunter killed the Wolf? They're both after Braverman at the same time in the woods near his cabin.
So she just takes him out for the 200-grand bounty.
Well, it was an accident.
The rib fragment broke off in the fight at the pool hall.
You had no idea that your beanbag gun would kill him.
Bones, what are you, a defense lawyer now? Well, a kind mind is a fine mind.
She cut off his head.
That wasn't an accident.
I have no rebuttal to that statement.
Right.
Let's go.
I am so nervous.
Anyone else nervous? You nervous? I'm nervous.
What if she starts explaining human dissection to these kids? That's gonna be a problem.
What is the code of the scientist? Observe, analyze, deduce! Wow.
These are not normal, fun children.
Kids, I want you to meet a very special friend.
In fact, this is her lab.
Isn't it amazing? It's amazing! She's a forensic anthropologist.
And what she does is amazing! She looks at old bones.
She figures out how people lived, what they were like even how they died.
She's amazing like magic.
She's amazing! But it's not magic.
It's Science! Her name is Dr.
Temperance Brennan.
But she's better known as the Bone Lady.
Dr.
Brennan, would you like to lead us in our scientists' oath? I most certainly would, Science Dude.
We see big stars.
Tiny atoms too.
Because that is what scientists do.
We get the facts and say what's true.
Because that is what scientists do.
We use our minds, embrace what's new.
Because that is what scientists do.
Thank you, Dr.
Brennan.
No.
Thank you.
What's that mean? English - US - SDH