iCarly s06e04 Episode Script

Okay.
Interesting.
So you guys see this too, right? There's a table.
I see the table.
I'm gonna find out what's going on.
Mister President.
.
Miss.
- Argh.
.
- Aye! Hey T-Bo.
Oh hey, Carly.
You are Carly, aren't ya? You better not be some girl in a Carly costume.
Nah, it's me.
Who are all these people? They're having the international costume convention at the hotel down the street.
So for the past two days.
.
This place has been infested with costumed freaks.
Uh, can I get a Blueberry Blitz? No! Aliens creep me out! Get outta my face! - Have fun.
- Yeah, I won't.
So what's up? There's a costume convention up the street.
Ah.
Hm.
You know, some of these weirdos look pretty cool.
Yeah, I know.
I wanna wear a costume.
Too bad Halloween only comes once a year.
Yeah.
Ya know, who says Halloween can only come once a year? The Lords of Holidays? How long 'til October thirty-first? Uh.
.
'Bout six months.
Perfect.
We're right at the half-way point.
Uh, what are ya thinking here? That we have our own "in between Halloween" party.
Next Saturday.
Oh.
.
Oh, we can call it Halfoween.
- Yes.
- Mm.
For what? Making up our own holiday and calling it Halfoween.
What, you afraid we're gonna get busted by the ween police? A little.
We're doing it.
Saturday night.
- To Halfoween! - Halfoween! Fist-bumping! Hey.
Who's he supposed to be? I dunno.
Hey, who are you supposed to be? I'm John Wilkes Booth.
Oh no! No no no no no no no no no no no.
.
In 5.
.
I know you see.
Somehow the world will change for me.
And be so wonderful.
Live life, breathe air.
I know somehow we're gonna get there.
And feel so wonderful.
It's all for real.
I'm telling you just how I feel.
So wake up the members of my nation.
It's your time to be.
There's no chance unless you take one.
And the time to see the brighter side of every situation.
Some things are meant to be.
So give me your best and leave the rest to me.
Leave it all to me.
(Leave it all to me).
Leave it all to me.
Just leave it all to me.
I'm sorry, shoes.
We had a lotta fun together, but I need to move on.
It's not shoe, it's me.
And don't worry, you'll meet other feet.
Oh, and no matter what you hear.
.
I'm not doing this 'cuz I'm about to start dating.
.
Some newer, younger, hotter shoes.
And that's how you break up with your old shoes! All shoes for this iCarly Webcast were provided by Shoe Shoe Shoodio.
.
A division of Tao Chemical.
Okay.
.
Ya wanna hear what we're doing next Saturday night? Do ya? Do ya wanna hear what we're doing next Saturday night? Do ya? Do ya? We're celebrating a brand new holiday.
.
- That we invented.
.
- Called.
.
Halfoween! Woo! Woo! What is Halfoween, you ask? - Hmm.
Is it a skin disease? - No.
Is it a country, just South of northoween but north of southoween? That makes no sense.
Aw, I'm a nub.
Freddie, tell the humans what Halfoween is! Halfoween is a new holiday invented by us here at iCarly as a way of celebrating Halloween at the half-way point between the previous Halloween and the future Halloween.
Any reproduction of Halfoween without written consent from ICarly Enterprises will result in the arrest and beating of your mother and/or cat.
And to get you in the mood for Halfoween.
.
Check out this half-a-Jack-o'lantern.
Ooh.
And this half-a-skeleton.
Ooh.
And of course.
.
Half-a-Gibbehhhhh.
Ooh.
Now don't worry.
.
This is only a visual effect.
I have not actually been sliced in half.
Okay, next on iCarly.
.
Hey.
.
Put that bowl of chips down by the lamp.
Yes ma'am.
And don't eat any.
Yes ma'am.
Happy Halfoween! What do ya think? Well, it's an improvement.
I'm Lewbert! See my wart?! That's amazing.
Awesome.
I both hate and love that.
Thanks.
And your costume.
.
I'm Sushi.
I'm Tuna Sushi! See my Ginger and Wasabi? I thought you were Toro Sushi.
What's toro? Fatty tuna.
No, I am not fatty tuna.
Thank you.
What are you looking at? Your costume.
I don't get it.
I'm hand sanitizer.
- Well.
.
Does it.
.
- Pump my head.
Oh.
Wait.
.
This doesn't smell like hand sanitizer.
Yeah, I didn't have any so I used Dijonnaise.
You did n.
.
Dijonnaise.
Ah! - Hey, is it ready yet? - No, but close! What is that thing? A cool game I rigged up for the party.
Does it work yet? Yep! See, right there where the coffee table is, there's going to be a huge basket filled with fabulous prizes.
- Who says fabulous? - Him.
So, I pull on this rope, and it'll lower a kid down into the basket, and then said kid has eight seconds to grab as many prizes as he can, before I jerk him back up outta the basket! Cool game! What do you call it? A lawsuit waiting to happen.
No.
I call it the jerk basket.
Want a demonstration? - Uh-huh.
- Oh, okay.
Okay, see, I pull this.
.
And it lowers the kid from the ceiling.
.
Gibby?! What what?! Gibbehh.
How long have you been up there?! I dunno, I fell asleep.
Okay, now imagine the coffee table's the big basket.
I lower Gibby down in to the basket.
.
There's no basket.
There'll be a basket! And then he grabs a prize.
I don't see a prize.
Just grab a napkin! Wow.
A napkin.
And then I jerk him outta the basket.
.
Aah! Ow!.
.
And then he gets to keep his prize.
All right, eight seconds on the clock! Okay, Simon, as soon as your hand touches a prize, you'll have eight seconds to grab as much stuff as ya can.
.
.
.
And then I'm gonna jerk ya right up outta the basket! Wait, I'm not ready yet! Here we go! Down.
.
Down.
.
Down.
.
Down.
.
Down.
.
Down.
.
Down.
Go! - Come on! - A little more! - Jerk! - Whoa! Woo! Yeah! Okay who's next?! - Me, me, me.
- Yeah! Hey Gibby! What's your costume a'sposed to be, weh?! Can you cool it with the Lewbert voice? 'Kay.
So what's your costume? I'm Alumina-man.
.
A superhero made entirely out of aluminum.
So, like Iron Man? Uh, at half the weight.
- Lisa, come here! - Hey! Hey there, Mister purple robot.
Happy Halfoween.
Thank you for inviting me to your party.
Would you like some candy? Uh let's see yeah.
Oh.
- Hi.
- Hey.
How great is it when a party guest brings ya candy? Hello, Carly.
Please have some candy.
Thanks.
All right, what's going on here?! I'm Lewbert! I got a wart! Ha ha ha.
Your wart is plump and hairy.
Candy? Sure, thanks.
- Hey Gibby.
- Hi, Gibby.
Girls.
You're so funny on iCarly.
So funny.
Yeah.
The show's a lotta fun.
Ha.
Hey, next time you're on iCarly, ya think we could come watch? Yeah, and maybe we could.
.
Do you not see me eating chicken wings?! Please.
Carly, Carls.
.
- What's up? - You gotta see this! Look! They're us! They wore iCarly costumes! How great is that?! Well, it's great for you and Freddie.
- Do the thing ya did! - Oh yeah, do it! 'Kay.
In five.
.
Four.
.
Three.
.
Two.
.
- I'm Sam! - I'm Carly! No you're not.
Why don't you guys go get some corn dogs.
'Kay.
Sure.
- I'm Carly.
- You're really not! Ya know, I didn't mean to be rude, but if you were a girl.
.
You wouldn't like it if some guy dressed up like you and was trying to pretend like he.
.
And was trying to pretend like he.
.
How come your voice sounds all.
.
How come your voice sounds all.
.
Okay what's going on with your guys' voic.
.
.
.
With your guys' vo.
.
Whoa whoa whoa, what's happening?! Why do we sound all weird?! I dunno but it's freaking me out! - Me too! - Ah.
Ah.
Ah.
Ah.
Ah.
- Ah.
- Nah-ha.
All right.
Here we.
.
Not now, I'm about to drop a kid.
Later.
Just come outside! Ahhhh! Your voice is so weird! Wait! Don't leave me! What do you wan.
.
? Ah! How do you make your voice sound like that?! - I'm not doing it on purpose! - Ah! Oh my God! - I think somebody did this to us.
- Whoa! Swing low, sweet chariot.
- Stop that! - Sorry.
This is serious! What if we talk like this forever?! I'll never get a boyfriend! Well, come on, it's not like you've had a boyfriend up 'til now.
Aw, that's mean! Luke, I am your father.
Stop playing around! Why you so uptight? Will you help us?! Okay okay um.
.
When did the weird talking start? Um.
.
'Bout five minutes ago.
- Yeah.
- 'Bout five.
Okay.
.
Is there anything that all three of you ate or drank? - Uh.
.
No.
- I don't think so.
Wait! Yeah.
.
We all had that candy.
From the robot! The purple robot! Well, who was in the purple robot costume?! We don't know! Okay, we just gotta find that purple robot.
.
.
.
And beat the fudge outta whoever's inside.
All right, you guys split up and find him.
What are you gonna do? I gotta work the jerk basket! Aw! Hey! Ah! Gibbeh, Gibbeh, Gibbeh.
Oh.
Oh.
.
It's.
.
It's just you.
What are you doing in my bed?! Ah! Relax.
.
Don't be scared.
Whoa.
.
This is one freaky dream.
It's not a dream! I need to find the purple robot person! Have you seen the purple robot person?! I'm pretty sure this is a dream.
Ah forget it! Wait.
.
W.
.
Why are you in my bed with a platter of chicken wings? Wings make me tired so I took a nap.
Why didn't you just.
.
Aw! You got wing sauce on my pillow! Relax.
This is just a dream.
D'ah.
.
You! You.
.
Happy Halfoween, Freddie Benson.
- Who are you?! - An old friend.
.
Who will now dramatically remove his robot head.
Nevel.
Are you feeling all right Freddie? You don't sound like yourself.
It's not funny! On the contrary, it is quite funny.
In fact, I don't think my funny bone has ever been so tickled.
Yeah well, you're in big trouble, buddy.
- Ooh, am I? - Yep.
Carly! I found the purple robot.
.
- It's Nevel! - It's Nevel?! Nevel's the one who.
.
- Wait, where are you?! - Just wait downstairs.
.
Freddie, I'd like you to meet my friends, Demetri and E-Von.
No you don't.
If you haven't noticed, they're large and powerful.
Whatever, Nevel.
Carly and Sam are looking for you too.
And when Sam gets her hands on you.
.
Carly and Sam are looking for a guy in a purple robot costume.
- So? - Demetri.
.
E-Von.
.
Help Mister Benson out of his clothes.
What?! No! No.
I have a wart! Hello? Purple robot? Don't be afraid.
I just wanna eat you! Aah! Purple robot! And now.
.
The head.
Nevel come on, there's no reason to put the head on me.
Let's just talk about this! I thought we were friends! And now.
.
Why are you doing this to me.
.
No one can hear you scream in a purple robot costume.
You can't take the head off.
It's magnetically sealed.
- Open the elevator.
- Yes Sir.
I hope Carly and Sam don't get too violent when they find you.
Oh wait, I hope they do.
Going down.
Ah! - Did you find the purple robot?! - No, but it's Nevel! Nevel?! - Yeah, Freddie found him! - Where are they?! I dunno! I was talking to Freddie on the phone and I said "where are you? " But then he didn't ans.
.
My voice.
.
My voice is coming back! La la la la la la! I'm not a man-girl any more! Well.
Wait, is mine?! Uh, hello?! Testing one two three.
.
Ham.
.
Ribs.
.
Fried chicken.
.
Pork.
.
Bacon.
.
Various meats.
.
It's coming back! And I'm hungry! Carly! I got him! Come on! Open the door, open the door, open the door! I'm trying.
I can't get it open.
Come on! - They got him! - Well look who it is.
- Your voice is back.
- Yeah, whatever it was wore off.
We tried to take his head off to see who it is.
.
- It's Nevel.
- Nevel?! Papperman?! Yep.
Why'd ya do it, Nevel? Hey, what's the matter with you?! Oh, don't wanna talk? I think I know a way to make him talk.
With Dijonnaise? No.
And.
.
Eighteen! Woo! - Should I stop?! - No! Nineteen! Woo! And now.
.
?! Twenty! Okay, I think Nevel's had enough.
Help me get the ropes off him.
Yep.
I don't think Nevel's gonna be bothering us anytime soon.
Nope.
And what makes you girls think that? 'Cuz we just slammed you in.
.
Nevel! - What the.
.
?! - Papperman?!?! Well, there's a twist.
Happy Halfoween! Wait! If you're.
.
Then who's in the robot costume? Well.
.
Let's disengage the magnetic head release and find out.
This is the worst party ever! - Dude, I am so sorry.
I didn't.
.
- Twenty times?! You had to slam me twenty times?! Here.
Why?! 'Cuz! You iCarlys were supposed to help me regain my popularity after the bread and butter pickle incident with that little girl, and you failed! No we didn't fail! We did help you! It's not our fault that afterwards you went and screamed at some dude in a wheelchair! He rolled over my foot and scratched my loafers! - Well, who gives a rat's.
.
- Sam.
.
- Wh.
.
Don't you think.
.
- Stop.
.
Stop.
He's right.
- What?! - Carly.
.
Are you kidding me?! No.
After that video went viral.
.
Of Nevel screaming at that man in the wheelchair.
.
We should've done something to help him.
- Why should we have helped him.
.
- It's our fault.
Nevel.
.
I don't know what to say.
.
Except.
.
I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry.
Well.
.
I guess I'm a big enough man to accept your apology.
- Good now get out.
- No.
Nevel, if you don't have plans.
.
Please stay here and celebrate Halfoween with us.
Ah.
A peace offering.
Hmm.
I accept your invitation.
Gibby.
.
Fetch me a chicken wing.
I ain't fetching you a chicken wing.
Gibby.
.
Bring Nevel a chicken wing.
Thank you.
I'll need a napkin.
Well.
.
Demetri.
.
E-Von.
.
I won't be needing your muscles any more tonight.
You may go.
Take him.
My wing! What's this? Oh, Sam Puckett, you let me go! Ah! You're squeezing my inner elbows! Ha! I think I'll keep this napkin.
Wh.
.
What are you iCarlys gonna do to me?! - No! - I hate being dangled! Too bad! You people better get me down from here right now! - You heard 'em.
- Going down! - Aah! - Woo! No! No, no, no, no! Not again! You're wrinkling my pants! No.
.
Woo! How does it feel?!