Black-ish (2014) s06e08 Episode Script

1 DRE: When I was a kid, art was just a bunch of old white guys from Europe painting other old white guys.
And then I saw my first Basquiat.
It was art, but it was also confrontational, revolutionary, and somehow undeniably black.
It changed everything for me, and because of that, my house is festooned with the works of prominent African-American artists.
"Soul Power" by Fahamu Pecou.
A bold painting by a bold artist.
Oh, I love this one because it tells the world that black people can swim, even though I can't.
And this is one of the last pieces the great Noah Davis did before he passed away.
And the man who did Obama's portrait did my T-shirt, because Kehinde Wiley is smart enough to get paid while he's still alive.
Good morning, family.
- Morning, babe.
- Mm.
Notice anything different about me? Hmm.
You're getting less needy? - No, that can't be that.
- JACK: Mm.
How is it possible that in a house so full of people, I can feel so alone and so cold? [Speaking French.]
LYNETTE: Dre? Is this an original Noah Davis? Oui, Lynette.
06x08 - O Mother Where Art Thou I never knew - you were an art lover.
- Oh.
Lynette loves anything that gets better with age, son.
Wine, art, moi.
[Both laugh.]
I have a bachelor's degree in Visual Arts from Spelman.
I wanted to study Art History, but they talked me out of it.
- Oh, boy.
- POPS: One of the last things - me and Ruby agreed on.
- Mm-hmm.
That and that cheese is not a dessert, no matter what Europe says.
[Laughs.]
We did you a favor, son.
Name me one successful Black artist.
Unh-unh.
Besides the guy who makes them happy little trees.
Mama, I keep telling you, we cannot claim Bob Ross just because he has an afro.
He ain't one of us.
Well, I'm gonna have to see his mama before I'm convinced.
- [Laughing.]
Believe.
That right? - Think about it.
Hey.
This is what I was born into.
Well, Dre, don't listen to them.
- Thank you.
- You and Rainbow have great taste.
Okay, first off, Rainbow has horrible taste.
That's all me.
- [Gasps.]
- All right? She wanted to hang stupid family pictures up.
Whoa, wait.
You chose all those paintings? I thought they came with the house.
[Sighs.]
I tried to take these philistines to the Kerry James Marshall exhibit, but no.
They wanted to go to a birthday party at a trampoline park.
The trampoline park had pictures of people on the trampoline.
- That's art, too, Dad.
- [Groans.]
And I got to see the Mona Lisa of ankle breaks.
- Mm-mh.
- The way his wife laughed after he hurt himself? [Chuckles.]
- They're probably divorced by now.
- Oh, yeah.
Andre, if you ever want to talk about art, you can do it with me.
Really? Oh, it is one of my favorite things.
- I am a member at LACMA - Ooh.
The Hammer, The Broad The California African American Museum? I have a plaque at the plaza.
A plaque in the plaza? Right between George Lucas' wife and Robert De Niro's wife.
- This is amazing.
- [Chuckles.]
Lynette, you're amazing! Okay, okay, okay.
Get your own fiancée.
- She's amazing, Pops.
- We have to go now.
Lynette has to referee the Urban League's - annual charity basketball game.
- [Snorts, chuckles.]
- Oh.
Okay.
- Say goodbye, baby.
Oh, bye.
But I loved catching up with you.
Oh.
I love you, too.
- What'd you say? - I I-I As in the band, U2.
I love U2, UB40, Us3, - anything with a "U" in it, Pops.
- Mm-hmm.
"You Be Illin'.
" Yeah! Huh! Get off me! No! Get away! RAINBOW: I've got pepper spray! I've got pepper spray! Wait What No, Mom, Mom, I'm I'm fine.
It's It's just a game.
Right now, I'm defending a children's hospital from the undead.
- Seen a lot of awful things in those halls.
- Hmm.
- But I've also seen a lot of hope.
- Hmm.
You want to join? Oh, I'd love to, but no.
Mnh-mnh.
I just made myself a pot of tea, and I'm gonna read a book.
Uh, come on, Mom.
We both have the day off.
Wouldn't it be great to do some mother-son zombie-busting? Okay, well, we can agree to disagree on that one and you can agree to put all of this back when you're done.
- Okay.
- Yeah? I promise I will put everything back perfectly as soon as all of the children are safe and sound.
- Whatever.
- Okay? All right.
We are back in the ga Uhp.
I'm dead.
All right.
Hey, guys.
This is good news.
The vape industry will pay us a lot of money if we can rehabilitate their image by proving their product is not for kids.
Now, how do we market - gummy-bear-flavored tobacco for adults? - [Cellphone vibrates.]
Go.
- [Laughs.]
- Chewy smoke.
Okay, Dre, what do you got? You got something? Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
I just got a text from Lynette.
Oh, okay.
[Chuckles.]
So, it finally happened, huh? What finally happened? You got yourself a mistress.
- Well done.
- What? No, man.
Lynette is my father's fiancée.
- Oh.
- Oh.
Oh.
I'm sorry.
No, we're both fans of Black art.
- Okay.
Sorry.
- Oh.
So am I.
- Word? - Yeah.
Airbrushed pictures of dead rappers, Maya Angelou quotes on plywood in pretty fonts, oil paintings of naked women in afros posing with various big cats.
Okay, that's not what I was talking about, Charlie.
I'm talking about Black artists.
- Oh.
- Fine artists whose works are in museums.
You know, like Charles White, uh, and Emory Douglas.
You guys know who I'm talking about, right? Obviously, we don't know them, Dre.
And the fact that you're even asking makes me wonder if you even know us.
Okay.
How about Basquiat? Everybody knows Basquiat.
- Mm.
- The cheese? This is insane.
You don't know who Jean-Michel Basquiat is? He brought street art into the fine art world decades before Banksy.
Uh Kara Walker's nightmarish silhouettes tells the story of American slavery and racism.
- So sad.
- I'm sorry, I don't I don't know.
This is where I am.
I can't talk to one person about one of my greatest loves.
Sweaters? - Cannolis? - Art.
You know what? This is crazy.
You know what? I'm just gonna call Lynette and ask her if she wants to go to a gallery.
She understands me.
You go, Dre.
You go be with her.
And while you're at it [Clears throat.]
bring me back a painting of a woman with a white tiger.
Matter of fact, here's $40.
Get me one that lights up.
So, Lynette and I got together, and going to a gallery with someone who loved art as much as I did was everything I hoped it would be.
It was a great day, and there was one way to make it perfect.
It's been a minute since I've been to The Cheesecake Machine.
[Chuckles.]
This is me and my mama's favorite spot.
You know, I love how they put a whole fried chicken on a leaf of iceberg and call it a salad.
[Both laugh.]
It's hard to find a 5,000-calorie salad in this town.
It ain't Georgia.
[Laughs.]
I see somebody's eyes were bigger than his stomach.
I told you not to fill up on that bread.
Now, we have a bit of a ride to get back home.
When was the last time you went to the bathroom? I went at the gallery.
Did you? Okay, you know what? You're right.
I-I should go right now.
- Well, hol hol hold on.
- Mm? There's just a little something - just right there.
- Where? Uh-huh? - Ooh.
[Chuckles.]
- Mnh.
- Got it.
- Oh.
[Chuckles.]
Thank you, Mama.
I mean Lynette.
Uh-oh.
I'm not cheating on my wife.
I'm cheating on my mother.
Whoa! What's happening, Black Jesus?! - [Sighs.]
Wow.
- Mm.
- You're cheating on your mother.
- Ah.
- Congratulations.
- Okay.
You moved past Oedipal and created your own complex.
Okay, here's the thing about it, Bow.
Hmm? - I kind of liked it.
- Ew.
It felt so right.
[Sighs.]
Lynette does a thing for me.
Mm.
This is like the worst Shakespeare play ever.
No, babe, we had a great day.
- Mm.
- We genuinely connected over art.
I didn't realize how much I was missing it until I found it.
Aww.
Well too bad you're gonna have to drop her.
'Cause you know your mom is easily threatened.
What? I'll just top this off for you.
- Okay.
- The hell you will.
You don't know how my baby likes his beer poured.
Go on, get out of here.
Okay.
Here, baby.
- You all right? - Yes, Mama.
She's mellowed.
All right, look at how she's handling Pops' and Lynette's relationship.
She's not threatened.
You're just saying that, Dre, 'cause you want to keep hanging out with Lynette.
No, Bow, I I want you to see it from my mother's perspective.
- Okay.
- Okay? It's half the work, and she doesn't always have to be on.
Everybody wins.
It's a win-win-win.
Okay, I've expressed my concerns, and I've told you how I think this is going to turn out.
So I have no guilt in allowing you to walk into this situation.
But God bless you.
- Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.
- Oh.
Hey, Mama.
- Ooh.
Um, I'm going to the museum with Lynette and the kids, and I would love for you to come with us.
Oh.
Oh, oh, sorry.
I got my earbuds in.
What did you say, sweetie? I said I'm going to the museum with Lynette and the kids, and I want you to come.
Sure.
Sounds great.
- Does it? - Yeah, sounds like fun.
[Chuckles.]
Look at my baby.
Taking his children and his mama out for a day at a classy museum.
- Mm-hmm.
- Oh, boo.
- Mwah.
- Mwah.
- Thank you, Mama.
- Proud of you, baby.
- Thank you.
- Uh-huh.
[Chuckles.]
[Clears throat.]
Having two mamas is gonna be great.
Hmm.
Uh how do you feel about adding an extra wife to this situation? I mean, you know, you always talk about how, you know, you hate doing the laundry.
I just feel we could you kn Okay.
I was just, you know Like I said, I was just, um just asking for a friend.
- JUNIOR: How's the book, Mom? - Aah! Ah.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey, Junior.
It's good.
[Sighs.]
Yeah, it's really, really good.
- Yeah, it looks like a real page-turner.
- Uh-huh.
- It's all right.
- Mom, I know you're a book person, but you should try this.
- VR is an incredible stress reliever.
- Oh, come on.
Okay.
I don't know if I'm gonna get into this.
Die! Die, you zombie jerks! I'll see you in Hell! [Grunts.]
This is all I ever wanted.
[Imitates explosion.]
It was all happening.
I was on a date with my art mom and my birth mom.
It was the type of thing dreams are made of.
My chérie amour - Mmm.
- Aww.
- Lovely as a summer day - Mmm.
[Laughs.]
You want some ice cream with that pie, baby? Bow says I have to cut back on the dairy.
[Laughs.]
You see any Rainbows around here, Lynette? Clear skies from what I can see, Ruby.
- Shall we, Dre? - Put it in my mouth.
Ah! - Mmm.
Mmm! - [Laughs.]
Mmm! - Mom mom mom mom.
- [Laughs.]
Yes! Oh! [To the tune of "My Chérie Amour".]
Mom mom mom mom Mom mom - Dre.
Dre.
- Huh? Hmm? The hell is wrong with you, boy? Nothing, Pops.
It's It's all good.
It's all very good.
Hey, guys, where should we start first, upstairs or downstairs? - Upstairs.
- Downstairs.
Okay, you know what? I'll choose.
Let's go to the sculpture garden.
- Okay.
- Okay.
This will be fun.
You just got to get into the spirit.
[Sighs.]
Why are you so on board with this? You think Lynette is the first woman to drag me into a museum? Look, she's not even the first woman to drag me into this museum.
I've learned as a black man of my age that there are certain subjects that people assume I know a lot about jazz, boxing, ribs, the war - Which war? - It doesn't matter.
Once a brother gets a few gray hairs in his head, white people just assume you're wise.
Why do you think Morgan Freeman has played God so many times? 'Cause he's got that old Black magic.
So, you could just lie to people? No, I don't just lie to people.
I use their assumptions about me against them.
Mm, I don't think people are that gullible, Pops.
Watch and learn, Jack, my boy.
Watch and learn.
This piece leaves me cold.
Well, you have to admit the artist does have masterful control of the medium.
You know, I didn't notice that before.
[Chuckles.]
Now I feel like an idiot.
Did I see you open for Herbie Hancock? I'm just here with my family today.
So let's just keep it our secret.
The interesting thing about this piece is that it's all about the objectification of the Black male body.
- Mm.
- Well, there's not much to objectify.
Ma Mama, come on.
Well, I'm just saying, there should be a little more "there" there.
- You know what I mean? - [Laughs.]
Amen.
- Come on, now.
You know what I'm saying.
- "Amen"? Huh? Like a little, old penis, okay? [Sighs.]
I don't know about you, but I think this artist shows amazing control of the medium.
Mm-hmm.
Absolutely.
The medium is totally controlled.
Amazingly.
[Chuckles.]
Aww.
That's so adorable.
You kids have no idea what you're talking about.
Excuse me.
I think what they meant to say is that this particular artist shows amazing control of the medium.
Oh.
I see it now.
Hey, I don't know why, but I feel comfortable asking you I haven't talked to my dad in 15 years.
Should I call him? Let's talk about it, son.
And I said, "Well, in this house, your name is O'Shea Jackson, and no, you cannot have another soda.
" - [Both laugh.]
- Look at us, two single mothers who raised Black sons in Los Angeles in the '80s.
Oh, we went through a lot.
Yeah.
The riots.
- Mm.
- O.
J.
- Ooh.
- [Chuckles.]
- The Kobe-Shaq beef.
- Mm.
Oh, that one almost tore my family apart.
But we survived it all.
There should be streets named after us.
Ruby Boulevard.
Lynette Avenue.
[Both laugh.]
I know.
Dre, three bread baskets at The Cheesecake Machine, and not once did you tell me all the things we had in common.
- Well - Wait a minute.
What was that? Mama, she's joking, all right? We talked about you the entire time.
No, no, no.
Not that part.
You took her to The Cheesecake Machine? Yeah.
The one on Sepulveda? Yeah.
That That's the closest one.
You could've taken her to sushi or some other nonsense, but instead, you took her to our place? If she wants to go, you let her son Doug take her.
- I - That tacky-ass restaurant is where you take your mother! You betrayed me! Oh.
Oh, oh, oh.
Come here.
Oh, I see you, I see you! - [Grunts.]
- Okay, I don't have the energy for whatever this is.
So, I had made a mistake and got too comfortable with my side mom.
Now there was hell to pay.
Ma? Brought you some Rolos.
Your favorite.
You can just leave them on the table.
[Sighs.]
Look.
Hey, Mama.
I'm sorry I took Lynette to The Cheesecake Machine.
I didn't know.
How could you not know that The Cheesecake Machine was our place? Ma, because it's everybody's place.
It's the one thing that everybody agrees on.
If they put one in the Middle East, I think everything would be good.
But still, it was something special just between the two of us.
[Sighs.]
I don't know if you've noticed, but your tastes have changed.
Ever since you went off to college and started experiencing a world outside of what I know, I've been losing parts of you.
Mama, that's not true.
Ah, yes, it is, Dre.
But still I guess it's also just a part of life.
I don't want to be the reason you don't grow.
I've adjusted to you living in Sherman Oaks.
Mm.
And I've adjusted to Rainbow being in the house.
[Laughs.]
I guess I'm just gonna have to adjust to sharing you with another woman.
I'm glad you've got an art friend.
- You are? - Mm.
I really am.
Come here.
These saved your life.
[Chuckles.]
So, Mom was cool with me hanging out with Lynette.
But something still felt off.
All right, Mom, I have got my headset, and I'm ready to go.
Uh, Mom, are are you dead in the game? Are you dead in life? Shh.
Junior, I beat the game.
I made my way to Catalina and killed every damn zombie on this island.
Once I was safe, I dragged over this couch, found a copy of my book, and put my feet up.
Come on.
Join me.
Let's relax together.
Oh, yeah, this is nice! I bet we could find a golf cart and go for a joy ride.
I could get used to it here.
Please, sweetie, don't make me ice you.
You're right, Mom.
Let's just do it your way.
Let's relax.
Love you.
Love you.
Even though Mama said she was fine, I could tell she needed some more convincing.
- Hey, Mama.
- Hey.
You remember that poster I had on my wall as a kid? You know, the one from "Good Times"? Ah, yeah.
The one with all them Negroes sinning? - [Chuckles.]
- So you do remember it.
You know that was the first piece of art I owned? Oh, Dre.
You know I only bought that to cover up the hole I punched in your wall after they canceled "St.
Elsewhere.
" - [Chuckles.]
- You know, it doesn't matter why.
What matters is that no corner of my life has not been inspired by you.
Aww.
I mean, Mama, you may not have taught me about art, but you showed me how to be passionate about the arts.
All that time we spent listening to records, you don't think that had an effect on me? Mm.
Mama, everything I am is because of you.
- Oh, I know.
- Mm.
Are you sure? Mm.
Because you will always be my number-one girl.
Ain't no competition.
So, you don't want to take Lynette to the gospel brunch at the House of Blues? - No, I don't.
- Mm.
In fact I've cleared my schedule.
So, if you want to go to the Farmer's Market, let's go.
If you want to go to church, let's go.
But it will be just the two of us.
All right, then.
- I already know.
- Hmm? I want to go to The Cheesecake Machine.
Done.
In Palm Springs.
- Palm Springs? - It's a new one! They just opened, Dre.
There's not even any graffiti in the bathroom yet.
Yeah, that's that's more of a weekend.
Great! Then we'll make a whole weekend of it, Dre.
[Laughs.]
You go tell your wife.
I'll start packing.
Rainbow, we're going away for the weekend! You can't come! And next, we have this self portrait by James Adams.
As with all the other paintings that we've seen today, you might notice that this piece clearly displays his trademark control of the medium.
Excuse me.
I don't recognize you.
Are you one of our docents? That depends.
What's a docent? Security? No need.
I'll let myself out.
Remember, control of the medium is within all of you.
Well, that sucks.
He was our ride.