Regular Show (2010) s06e09 Episode Script
The White Elephant Gift Exchange
1 All right, everybody.
It's the holiday season, so we've got a lot of things on the it's the holiday season, so we've got a lot of things on the agenda.
We've got a lot of things on the agenda.
We've got hang the lights on the agenda.
We've got hang the lights on the tree, prepare the track for the we've got hang the lights on the tree, prepare the track for the annual sled-a-thon, and last but tree, prepare the track for the annual sled-a-thon, and last but not least, tonight is our yearly annual sled-a-thon, and last but not least, tonight is our yearly white elephant gift exchange.
Not least, tonight is our yearly white elephant gift exchange.
- White elephant gift exchange.
- Whoo! Whoo! Hear that, sugar plums?! Whoo! Hear that, sugar plums?! White elephant! Hear that, sugar plums?! White elephant! You all know muscle man brings white elephant! You all know muscle man brings it with the gifts! You all know muscle man brings it with the gifts! I'm gonna start bringing in the it with the gifts! I'm gonna start bringing in the holiday cheer right now! I'm gonna start bringing in the holiday cheer right now! Whoo-hoo! Holiday cheer right now! Whoo-hoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo-hoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Benson, you've got to Benson, you've got to call off the white elephant.
Benson, you've got to call off the white elephant.
Yeah.
Call off the white elephant.
Yeah.
You know muscle man always Yeah.
You know muscle man always pranks us by getting terrible you know muscle man always pranks us by getting terrible gifts.
Pranks us by getting terrible gifts.
Every year, his gifts gifts.
Every year, his gifts ruin Christmas! Every year, his gifts ruin Christmas! Yeah! Ruin Christmas! Yeah! I love the guy, but he doesn't Yeah! I love the guy, but he doesn't know when to quit.
I love the guy, but he doesn't know when to quit.
You remember the glove know when to quit.
You remember the glove incident.
You remember the glove incident.
Incident.
Don't remind me.
Don't remind me.
Every time you think you're don't remind me.
Every time you think you're gonna get sothing you want, every time you think you're gonna get sothing you want, then bam! Muscle man gonna get sothing you want, then bam! Muscle man swoops in, steals your good then bam! Muscle man swoops in, steals your good gift, and you're stuck with his swoops in, steals your good gift, and you're stuck with his prank one.
Gift, and you're stuck with his prank one.
But this year's gonna be prank one.
But this year's gonna be different.
But this year's gonna be different.
This year, we're gonna give him different.
This year, we're gonna give him the horrible gifts.
This year, we're gonna give him the horrible gifts.
Really? Okay.
The horrible gifts.
Really? Okay.
Nice! Really? Okay.
Nice! But there's no way Nice! But there's no way of knowing if he'll pick the But there's no way of knowing if he'll pick the right gift.
Of knowing if he'll pick the right gift.
It's impossible to rig right gift.
It's impossible to rig it.
It's impossible to rig it.
It's not impossible it.
It's not impossible if the odds are stacked in your It's not impossible if the odds are stacked in your favor.
If the odds are stacked in your favor.
What do you mean? Favor.
What do you mean? I mean I've got a What do you mean? I mean I've got a plan.
I mean I've got a plan.
The order of the white elephant plan.
The order of the white elephant gift exchange is decided by the order of the white elephant gift exchange is decided by picking random numbers out of a gift exchange is decided by picking random numbers out of a hat.
Picking random numbers out of a hat.
Next up is number 6! Hat.
Next up is number 6! Ohhhhhhhhhh! Next up is number 6! Ohhhhhhhhhh! Lucky number 6! Ohhhhhhhhhh! Lucky number 6! But what if it wasn't lucky number 6! But what if it wasn't random? But what if it wasn't random? What if we write the exact same random? What if we write the exact same number on every slip of paper What if we write the exact same number on every slip of paper pretend to have our numbers number on every slip of paper pretend to have our numbers called? Pretend to have our numbers called? Lucky number 6! Called? Lucky number 6! I wonder what it could be.
Lucky number 6! I wonder what it could be.
Yes.
I wonder what it could be.
Yes.
What could it be? Yes.
What could it be? What's something muscle man what could it be? What's something muscle man wouldn't want to steal What's something muscle man wouldn't want to steal something even he would find wouldn't want to steal something even he would find absolutely horrible? Something even he would find absolutely horrible? Deodorant.
Absolutely horrible? Deodorant.
Oh, a new tie Deodorant.
Oh, a new tie A hugstable doll? Oh, a new tie A hugstable doll? Close but no.
- A hugstable doll? - Close but no.
- Close but no.
- Aww.
Aww.
Salad accessories? Aww.
Salad accessories? Yes Salad accessories? Yes salad accessories! Yes salad accessories! It's a known fact that salad accessories! It's a known fact that muscle man hates anything it's a known fact that muscle man hates anything salad-related.
Muscle man hates anything salad-related.
Ohh! Salad-related.
Ohh! Keep doing this gift Ohh! Keep doing this gift after gift nothing but salad Keep doing this gift after gift nothing but salad accessories until muscle man after gift nothing but salad accessories until muscle man is the only one left in the game accessories until muscle man is the only one left in the game who hasn't stolen anything Is the only one left in the game who hasn't stolen anything Blech! Who hasn't stolen anything Blech! Leaving him no Blech! Leaving him no choice but to pick the last Leaving him no choice but to pick the last remaining gift we set up for choice but to pick the last remaining gift we set up for him.
Remaining gift we set up for him.
And when he goes to open the him.
And when he goes to open the gift And when he goes to open the gift Yeah? Yeah? Gift Yeah? Yeah? I don't know.
Yeah? Yeah? I don't know.
I haven't thought that far I don't know.
I haven't thought that far ahead.
I haven't thought that far ahead.
Awww! Ahead.
Awww! But that's where you Awww! But that's where you guys come in.
But that's where you guys come in.
I already bought all the salad guys come in.
I already bought all the salad stuff.
I already bought all the salad stuff.
We just need to find something stuff.
We just need to find something that will make the worst we just need to find something that will make the worst possible gift for muscle man.
That will make the worst possible gift for muscle man.
Hm-hm! Possible gift for muscle man.
Hm-hm! With pleasure.
Hm-hm! With pleasure.
Yeah.
With pleasure.
Yeah.
We could totally do that! Yeah.
We could totally do that! All right, then.
We could totally do that! All right, then.
Let's split up and get shopping.
All right, then.
Let's split up and get shopping.
We're out for revenge here, let's split up and get shopping.
We're out for revenge here, people, so go, go, go! We're out for revenge here, people, so go, go, go! People, so go, go, go! Ha ha! Ha ha! What about this? Ha ha! What about this? Can't get any worse than expired what about this? Can't get any worse than expired tuna! Can't get any worse than expired tuna! Isn't that a bit much? Tuna! Isn't that a bit much? No way! Isn't that a bit much? No way! Remember what he did to you in No way! Remember what he did to you in last year's white elephant? Remember what he did to you in last year's white elephant? Oh, it's perfect! Last year's white elephant? Oh, it's perfect! It looks just like Oh, it's perfect! It looks just like the s.
S.
Constantinople! It looks just like the s.
S.
Constantinople! I was hoping you'd the s.
S.
Constantinople! I was hoping you'd pick that one, pops.
I was hoping you'd pick that one, pops.
I love it.
Pick that one, pops.
I love it.
Not so fast, I love it.
Not so fast, pops.
Not so fast, pops.
It's my turn now, and I choose pops.
It's my turn now, and I choose to steal This gift! It's my turn now, and I choose to steal This gift! - To steal This gift! - Don't worry, Don't worry, pops.
Don't worry, pops.
It's all part of the game.
Pops.
It's all part of the game.
Now you get to open the last it's all part of the game.
Now you get to open the last gift.
Now you get to open the last gift.
Oh! Gift.
Oh! Ooh! What on earth is this? Oh! Ooh! What on earth is this? Eww! Ooh! What on earth is this? Eww! It used to be Eww! It used to be ranch dressing, 20 years ago.
It used to be ranch dressing, 20 years ago.
Now boom! Brand-new paper ranch dressing, 20 years ago.
Now boom! Brand-new paper weight.
Now boom! Brand-new paper weight.
Weight.
You there what's the worst You there what's the worst expired food item you've got? You there what's the worst expired food item you've got? Oh, dude! Expired food item you've got? Oh, dude! We got to get this! Oh, dude! We got to get this! I don't know.
We got to get this! I don't know.
Don't you think this is too I don't know.
Don't you think this is too harsh? Don't you think this is too harsh? Oh, so muscle man's harsh? Oh, so muscle man's gifts were never too harsh? Oh, so muscle man's gifts were never too harsh? Aah! Aah! Aah! Gifts were never too harsh? Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah! Itching powder in the sweater.
Itching powder in the sweater.
Classic white elephant gift.
Itching powder in the sweater.
Classic white elephant gift.
My eyes! Classic white elephant gift.
My eyes! It's in my eyes! My eyes! It's in my eyes! You're right.
It's in my eyes! You're right.
It's not harsh at all.
You're right.
It's not harsh at all.
Let's buy it.
It's not harsh at all.
Let's buy it.
Hm-hm-hm-hm-hm-hm-hm! How much? $500 for the day.
Benson, do you really $500 for the day.
Benson, do you really want to go through with this? Benson, do you really want to go through with this? Wow! Want to go through with this? Wow! These gloves are great! Wow! These gloves are great! Do you think so? These gloves are great! Do you think so? Yeah! Do you think so? Yeah! They're so soft! Yeah! They're so soft! Do you really they're so soft! Do you really think so? Do you really think so? Yeah, I do! Why? Think so? Yeah, I do! Why? Because they're Yeah, I do! Why? Because they're made of my old underwear! Because they're made of my old underwear! Aah! Aah! Made of my old underwear! Aah! Aah! Aah-aah-aah! Aah! Aah! Aah-aah-aah! Noooo! Aah-aah-aah! Noooo! I didn't want to retire at 65 noooo! I didn't want to retire at 65 anyway.
I didn't want to retire at 65 anyway.
Pleasure doing business with anyway.
Pleasure doing business with you.
Pleasure doing business with you.
Man.
You.
Man.
Which one should we give him? Man.
Which one should we give him? I don't know which which one should we give him? I don't know which one's worse.
I don't know which one's worse.
All of them.
One's worse.
All of them.
All of them! All of them.
All of them! Put all of them together now! - All of them! - Put all of them together now! Put all of them together now! Okay, okay, okay.
Cool it.
He's here.
Happy white elephant, Benson! Geez.
What's with all the salad stuff? You guys on a diet or something? What's with all the salad stuff? You guys on a diet or something? All right, everybody.
You guys on a diet or something? All right, everybody.
We're down to the last two All right, everybody.
We're down to the last two gifts.
We're down to the last two gifts.
I wonder what they could be.
Gifts.
I wonder what they could be.
Next up is number 6! I wonder what they could be.
Next up is number 6! Ohhhhhhhhhh! Next up is number 6! Ohhhhhhhhhh! Lucky number 6! Ohhhhhhhhhh! Lucky number 6! Rigby, come on up and lucky number 6! Rigby, come on up and pick your gift! Rigby, come on up and pick your gift! Hmm.
Pick your gift! Hmm.
Which one? Hmm.
Which one? Good choice, bro.
Which one? Good choice, bro.
Good choice, bro.
Yeah, I know.
Yeah, I know.
Good.
Yeah, I know.
Good.
I know you know.
Good.
I know you know.
I know you know.
Well, I know you know I know.
Well, I know you know I know.
Just open it! Well, I know you know I know.
Just open it! Open it.
- Just open it! - Open it.
- Open it.
- Huh?! Huh?! A new TV? Huh?! A new TV? Happy a new TV? Happy white elephant, bro! Happy white elephant, bro! Oh.
What? White elephant, bro! Oh.
What? What? Oh.
What? What? Okay.
What? Okay.
What's the deal, muscle man? Okay.
What's the deal, muscle man? What are you what's the deal, muscle man? What are you talking about, bro? What are you talking about, bro? Come on.
Talking about, bro? Come on.
We know this is a prank.
Come on.
We know this is a prank.
Yeah! We know this is a prank.
Yeah! Is this thing gonna electrocute Yeah! Is this thing gonna electrocute me if I plug it in or something? Is this thing gonna electrocute me if I plug it in or something? No, bro! Me if I plug it in or something? No, bro! It's not a prank! No, bro! It's not a prank! It's an honest-to-goodness it's not a prank! It's an honest-to-goodness flat-screen TV.
It's an honest-to-goodness flat-screen TV.
Flat-screen TV.
Look, I admit I haven't been the Look, I admit I haven't been the best white elephant participant look, I admit I haven't been the best white elephant participant in the last few years.
Best white elephant participant in the last few years.
Some of you may have even called in the last few years.
Some of you may have even called my pranks harsh or out of line.
Some of you may have even called my pranks harsh or out of line.
And I thought my pranks harsh or out of line.
And I thought this gift would bring us closer And I thought this gift would bring us closer together, 'cause you guys are this gift would bring us closer together, 'cause you guys are like my family.
Together, 'cause you guys are like my family.
That's what the holidays are all like my family.
That's what the holidays are all about family.
That's what the holidays are all about family.
About family.
Anyways, since there's nothing Anyways, since there's nothing good left to steal, I'll just anyways, since there's nothing good left to steal, I'll just take this one.
Good left to steal, I'll just take this one.
Mordecai, rigby, others, you have ruined the spirit of the white elephant gift exchange.
Have ruined the spirit of the white elephant gift exchange.
Now you get to spend all of white elephant gift exchange.
Now you get to spend all of eternity in my temple of gifts.
Now you get to spend all of eternity in my temple of gifts.
P.
S.
You don't get to open eternity in my temple of gifts.
P.
S.
You don't get to open the gifts.
P.
S.
You don't get to open the gifts.
Aw, man! The gifts.
Aw, man! Look, I know we went Aw, man! Look, I know we went a little overboard with the Look, I know we went a little overboard with the prank gift for muscle man, but a little overboard with the prank gift for muscle man, but did you see the ones he gave prank gift for muscle man, but did you see the ones he gave us the ranch dressing, the did you see the ones he gave us the ranch dressing, the sweaters, the underwear gloves?! Us the ranch dressing, the sweaters, the underwear gloves?! I could go on.
Sweaters, the underwear gloves?! I could go on.
You're not supposed to get I could go on.
You're not supposed to get gifts you like.
You're not supposed to get gifts you like.
You're supposed to give gifts gifts you like.
You're supposed to give gifts you don't like.
You're supposed to give gifts you don't like.
That's what makes it fun.
You don't like.
That's what makes it fun.
Except you had to go and rig the that's what makes it fun.
Except you had to go and rig the game and get revenge.
Except you had to go and rig the game and get revenge.
Well, I hope you're happy with game and get revenge.
Well, I hope you're happy with yourselves.
Well, I hope you're happy with yourselves.
I guess he's right.
Yourselves.
I guess he's right.
Maybe we got too hung up on it.
I guess he's right.
Maybe we got too hung up on it.
It really is just a maybe we got too hung up on it.
It really is just a silly game, after all.
It really is just a silly game, after all.
And he did give us silly game, after all.
And he did give us that sweet TV.
And he did give us that sweet TV.
Yeah.
That sweet TV.
Yeah.
Muscle man was just trying to Yeah.
Muscle man was just trying to have a good time, and maybe muscle man was just trying to have a good time, and maybe that's what we should do, too.
Have a good time, and maybe that's what we should do, too.
Mr.
white elephant, sir That's what we should do, too.
Mr.
White elephant, sir Yes? Mr.
white elephant, sir Yes? Send us back so yes? Send us back so we can stop muscle man from Send us back so we can stop muscle man from opening that gift.
We can stop muscle man from opening that gift.
Well, I don't know.
Opening that gift.
Well, I don't know.
I've never really done that well, I don't know.
I've never really done that before.
I've never really done that before.
I suppose you could go home, or before.
I suppose you could go home, or you could see what's in this I suppose you could go home, or you could see what's in this box.
You could see what's in this box.
Can we see what's in box.
Can we see what's in it first? Can we see what's in it first? Oww! It first? Oww! No, thanks.
Oww! No, thanks.
I think we'll just go home.
No, thanks.
I think we'll just go home.
Fine.
- I think we'll just go home.
- Fine.
- Fine.
- Muscle man, wait.
Muscle man, wait.
What is it, bro? Muscle man, wait.
What is it, bro? Well, the truth is == What is it, bro? Well, the truth is == Benson, wait! Well, the truth is == Benson, wait! It's not a TV! Benson, wait! It's not a TV! It's just a box full of old it's not a TV! It's just a box full of old Chinese food! It's just a box full of old Chinese food! What?! Chinese food! What?! Huh? What?! Huh? Huh? Gotcha, bros! Gotcha, bros! Heartfelt speech gets 'em every gotcha, bros! Heartfelt speech gets 'em every time! Heartfelt speech gets 'em every time! Time! What were you gonna say, Benson? What were you gonna say, Benson? Enjoy opening that what were you gonna say, Benson? Enjoy opening that gift.
Enjoy opening that gift.
[ In slow gift.
Okay, bro.
Okay, bro.
- [ Motion .]
Okay, bro.
- have a Holly jolly have a Holly jolly Christmas have a Holly jolly Christmas it's the best time of Christmas it's the best time of the year it's the best time of the year I don't know if there'll be the year I don't know if there'll be snow, but have a cup of cheer I don't know if there'll be snow, but have a cup of cheer have a Holly jolly Christmas Snow, but have a cup of cheer have a Holly jolly Christmas and when you walk down have a Holly jolly Christmas and when you walk down the street and when you walk down the street say hello to friends you know the street say hello to friends you know and everyone you meet say hello to friends you know and everyone you meet ho ho, the mistletoe And everyone you meet ho ho, the mistletoe hung where you can see ho ho, the mistletoe hung where you can see somebody waits for you hung where you can see somebody waits for you kiss her once for me somebody waits for you kiss her once for me have a Holly jolly Christmas kiss her once for me have a Holly jolly Christmas and in case you didn't hear have a Holly jolly Christmas and in case you didn't hear oh, by golly, have a Holly and in case you didn't hear oh, by golly, have a Holly jolly Christmas this year oh, by golly, have a Holly jolly Christmas this year have a Holly jolly jolly Christmas this year have a Holly jolly Christmas have a Holly jolly Christmas it's the best time of Christmas it's the best time of the year it's the best time of the year Have a Holly jolly Christmas and when you walk Christmas and when you walk Now, this is fun! And when you walk Now, this is fun! - Now, this is fun! - say hello to friends you say hello to friends you know and everyone you meet say hello to friends you know and everyone you meet ho ho, the mistletoe Know and everyone you meet ho ho, the mistletoe hung where you can see ho ho, the mistletoe hung where you can see somebody waits for you hung where you can see somebody waits for you Somebody waits for you kiss her once
It's the holiday season, so we've got a lot of things on the it's the holiday season, so we've got a lot of things on the agenda.
We've got a lot of things on the agenda.
We've got hang the lights on the agenda.
We've got hang the lights on the tree, prepare the track for the we've got hang the lights on the tree, prepare the track for the annual sled-a-thon, and last but tree, prepare the track for the annual sled-a-thon, and last but not least, tonight is our yearly annual sled-a-thon, and last but not least, tonight is our yearly white elephant gift exchange.
Not least, tonight is our yearly white elephant gift exchange.
- White elephant gift exchange.
- Whoo! Whoo! Hear that, sugar plums?! Whoo! Hear that, sugar plums?! White elephant! Hear that, sugar plums?! White elephant! You all know muscle man brings white elephant! You all know muscle man brings it with the gifts! You all know muscle man brings it with the gifts! I'm gonna start bringing in the it with the gifts! I'm gonna start bringing in the holiday cheer right now! I'm gonna start bringing in the holiday cheer right now! Whoo-hoo! Holiday cheer right now! Whoo-hoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo-hoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Benson, you've got to Benson, you've got to call off the white elephant.
Benson, you've got to call off the white elephant.
Yeah.
Call off the white elephant.
Yeah.
You know muscle man always Yeah.
You know muscle man always pranks us by getting terrible you know muscle man always pranks us by getting terrible gifts.
Pranks us by getting terrible gifts.
Every year, his gifts gifts.
Every year, his gifts ruin Christmas! Every year, his gifts ruin Christmas! Yeah! Ruin Christmas! Yeah! I love the guy, but he doesn't Yeah! I love the guy, but he doesn't know when to quit.
I love the guy, but he doesn't know when to quit.
You remember the glove know when to quit.
You remember the glove incident.
You remember the glove incident.
Incident.
Don't remind me.
Don't remind me.
Every time you think you're don't remind me.
Every time you think you're gonna get sothing you want, every time you think you're gonna get sothing you want, then bam! Muscle man gonna get sothing you want, then bam! Muscle man swoops in, steals your good then bam! Muscle man swoops in, steals your good gift, and you're stuck with his swoops in, steals your good gift, and you're stuck with his prank one.
Gift, and you're stuck with his prank one.
But this year's gonna be prank one.
But this year's gonna be different.
But this year's gonna be different.
This year, we're gonna give him different.
This year, we're gonna give him the horrible gifts.
This year, we're gonna give him the horrible gifts.
Really? Okay.
The horrible gifts.
Really? Okay.
Nice! Really? Okay.
Nice! But there's no way Nice! But there's no way of knowing if he'll pick the But there's no way of knowing if he'll pick the right gift.
Of knowing if he'll pick the right gift.
It's impossible to rig right gift.
It's impossible to rig it.
It's impossible to rig it.
It's not impossible it.
It's not impossible if the odds are stacked in your It's not impossible if the odds are stacked in your favor.
If the odds are stacked in your favor.
What do you mean? Favor.
What do you mean? I mean I've got a What do you mean? I mean I've got a plan.
I mean I've got a plan.
The order of the white elephant plan.
The order of the white elephant gift exchange is decided by the order of the white elephant gift exchange is decided by picking random numbers out of a gift exchange is decided by picking random numbers out of a hat.
Picking random numbers out of a hat.
Next up is number 6! Hat.
Next up is number 6! Ohhhhhhhhhh! Next up is number 6! Ohhhhhhhhhh! Lucky number 6! Ohhhhhhhhhh! Lucky number 6! But what if it wasn't lucky number 6! But what if it wasn't random? But what if it wasn't random? What if we write the exact same random? What if we write the exact same number on every slip of paper What if we write the exact same number on every slip of paper pretend to have our numbers number on every slip of paper pretend to have our numbers called? Pretend to have our numbers called? Lucky number 6! Called? Lucky number 6! I wonder what it could be.
Lucky number 6! I wonder what it could be.
Yes.
I wonder what it could be.
Yes.
What could it be? Yes.
What could it be? What's something muscle man what could it be? What's something muscle man wouldn't want to steal What's something muscle man wouldn't want to steal something even he would find wouldn't want to steal something even he would find absolutely horrible? Something even he would find absolutely horrible? Deodorant.
Absolutely horrible? Deodorant.
Oh, a new tie Deodorant.
Oh, a new tie A hugstable doll? Oh, a new tie A hugstable doll? Close but no.
- A hugstable doll? - Close but no.
- Close but no.
- Aww.
Aww.
Salad accessories? Aww.
Salad accessories? Yes Salad accessories? Yes salad accessories! Yes salad accessories! It's a known fact that salad accessories! It's a known fact that muscle man hates anything it's a known fact that muscle man hates anything salad-related.
Muscle man hates anything salad-related.
Ohh! Salad-related.
Ohh! Keep doing this gift Ohh! Keep doing this gift after gift nothing but salad Keep doing this gift after gift nothing but salad accessories until muscle man after gift nothing but salad accessories until muscle man is the only one left in the game accessories until muscle man is the only one left in the game who hasn't stolen anything Is the only one left in the game who hasn't stolen anything Blech! Who hasn't stolen anything Blech! Leaving him no Blech! Leaving him no choice but to pick the last Leaving him no choice but to pick the last remaining gift we set up for choice but to pick the last remaining gift we set up for him.
Remaining gift we set up for him.
And when he goes to open the him.
And when he goes to open the gift And when he goes to open the gift Yeah? Yeah? Gift Yeah? Yeah? I don't know.
Yeah? Yeah? I don't know.
I haven't thought that far I don't know.
I haven't thought that far ahead.
I haven't thought that far ahead.
Awww! Ahead.
Awww! But that's where you Awww! But that's where you guys come in.
But that's where you guys come in.
I already bought all the salad guys come in.
I already bought all the salad stuff.
I already bought all the salad stuff.
We just need to find something stuff.
We just need to find something that will make the worst we just need to find something that will make the worst possible gift for muscle man.
That will make the worst possible gift for muscle man.
Hm-hm! Possible gift for muscle man.
Hm-hm! With pleasure.
Hm-hm! With pleasure.
Yeah.
With pleasure.
Yeah.
We could totally do that! Yeah.
We could totally do that! All right, then.
We could totally do that! All right, then.
Let's split up and get shopping.
All right, then.
Let's split up and get shopping.
We're out for revenge here, let's split up and get shopping.
We're out for revenge here, people, so go, go, go! We're out for revenge here, people, so go, go, go! People, so go, go, go! Ha ha! Ha ha! What about this? Ha ha! What about this? Can't get any worse than expired what about this? Can't get any worse than expired tuna! Can't get any worse than expired tuna! Isn't that a bit much? Tuna! Isn't that a bit much? No way! Isn't that a bit much? No way! Remember what he did to you in No way! Remember what he did to you in last year's white elephant? Remember what he did to you in last year's white elephant? Oh, it's perfect! Last year's white elephant? Oh, it's perfect! It looks just like Oh, it's perfect! It looks just like the s.
S.
Constantinople! It looks just like the s.
S.
Constantinople! I was hoping you'd the s.
S.
Constantinople! I was hoping you'd pick that one, pops.
I was hoping you'd pick that one, pops.
I love it.
Pick that one, pops.
I love it.
Not so fast, I love it.
Not so fast, pops.
Not so fast, pops.
It's my turn now, and I choose pops.
It's my turn now, and I choose to steal This gift! It's my turn now, and I choose to steal This gift! - To steal This gift! - Don't worry, Don't worry, pops.
Don't worry, pops.
It's all part of the game.
Pops.
It's all part of the game.
Now you get to open the last it's all part of the game.
Now you get to open the last gift.
Now you get to open the last gift.
Oh! Gift.
Oh! Ooh! What on earth is this? Oh! Ooh! What on earth is this? Eww! Ooh! What on earth is this? Eww! It used to be Eww! It used to be ranch dressing, 20 years ago.
It used to be ranch dressing, 20 years ago.
Now boom! Brand-new paper ranch dressing, 20 years ago.
Now boom! Brand-new paper weight.
Now boom! Brand-new paper weight.
Weight.
You there what's the worst You there what's the worst expired food item you've got? You there what's the worst expired food item you've got? Oh, dude! Expired food item you've got? Oh, dude! We got to get this! Oh, dude! We got to get this! I don't know.
We got to get this! I don't know.
Don't you think this is too I don't know.
Don't you think this is too harsh? Don't you think this is too harsh? Oh, so muscle man's harsh? Oh, so muscle man's gifts were never too harsh? Oh, so muscle man's gifts were never too harsh? Aah! Aah! Aah! Gifts were never too harsh? Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah! Itching powder in the sweater.
Itching powder in the sweater.
Classic white elephant gift.
Itching powder in the sweater.
Classic white elephant gift.
My eyes! Classic white elephant gift.
My eyes! It's in my eyes! My eyes! It's in my eyes! You're right.
It's in my eyes! You're right.
It's not harsh at all.
You're right.
It's not harsh at all.
Let's buy it.
It's not harsh at all.
Let's buy it.
Hm-hm-hm-hm-hm-hm-hm! How much? $500 for the day.
Benson, do you really $500 for the day.
Benson, do you really want to go through with this? Benson, do you really want to go through with this? Wow! Want to go through with this? Wow! These gloves are great! Wow! These gloves are great! Do you think so? These gloves are great! Do you think so? Yeah! Do you think so? Yeah! They're so soft! Yeah! They're so soft! Do you really they're so soft! Do you really think so? Do you really think so? Yeah, I do! Why? Think so? Yeah, I do! Why? Because they're Yeah, I do! Why? Because they're made of my old underwear! Because they're made of my old underwear! Aah! Aah! Made of my old underwear! Aah! Aah! Aah-aah-aah! Aah! Aah! Aah-aah-aah! Noooo! Aah-aah-aah! Noooo! I didn't want to retire at 65 noooo! I didn't want to retire at 65 anyway.
I didn't want to retire at 65 anyway.
Pleasure doing business with anyway.
Pleasure doing business with you.
Pleasure doing business with you.
Man.
You.
Man.
Which one should we give him? Man.
Which one should we give him? I don't know which which one should we give him? I don't know which one's worse.
I don't know which one's worse.
All of them.
One's worse.
All of them.
All of them! All of them.
All of them! Put all of them together now! - All of them! - Put all of them together now! Put all of them together now! Okay, okay, okay.
Cool it.
He's here.
Happy white elephant, Benson! Geez.
What's with all the salad stuff? You guys on a diet or something? What's with all the salad stuff? You guys on a diet or something? All right, everybody.
You guys on a diet or something? All right, everybody.
We're down to the last two All right, everybody.
We're down to the last two gifts.
We're down to the last two gifts.
I wonder what they could be.
Gifts.
I wonder what they could be.
Next up is number 6! I wonder what they could be.
Next up is number 6! Ohhhhhhhhhh! Next up is number 6! Ohhhhhhhhhh! Lucky number 6! Ohhhhhhhhhh! Lucky number 6! Rigby, come on up and lucky number 6! Rigby, come on up and pick your gift! Rigby, come on up and pick your gift! Hmm.
Pick your gift! Hmm.
Which one? Hmm.
Which one? Good choice, bro.
Which one? Good choice, bro.
Good choice, bro.
Yeah, I know.
Yeah, I know.
Good.
Yeah, I know.
Good.
I know you know.
Good.
I know you know.
I know you know.
Well, I know you know I know.
Well, I know you know I know.
Just open it! Well, I know you know I know.
Just open it! Open it.
- Just open it! - Open it.
- Open it.
- Huh?! Huh?! A new TV? Huh?! A new TV? Happy a new TV? Happy white elephant, bro! Happy white elephant, bro! Oh.
What? White elephant, bro! Oh.
What? What? Oh.
What? What? Okay.
What? Okay.
What's the deal, muscle man? Okay.
What's the deal, muscle man? What are you what's the deal, muscle man? What are you talking about, bro? What are you talking about, bro? Come on.
Talking about, bro? Come on.
We know this is a prank.
Come on.
We know this is a prank.
Yeah! We know this is a prank.
Yeah! Is this thing gonna electrocute Yeah! Is this thing gonna electrocute me if I plug it in or something? Is this thing gonna electrocute me if I plug it in or something? No, bro! Me if I plug it in or something? No, bro! It's not a prank! No, bro! It's not a prank! It's an honest-to-goodness it's not a prank! It's an honest-to-goodness flat-screen TV.
It's an honest-to-goodness flat-screen TV.
Flat-screen TV.
Look, I admit I haven't been the Look, I admit I haven't been the best white elephant participant look, I admit I haven't been the best white elephant participant in the last few years.
Best white elephant participant in the last few years.
Some of you may have even called in the last few years.
Some of you may have even called my pranks harsh or out of line.
Some of you may have even called my pranks harsh or out of line.
And I thought my pranks harsh or out of line.
And I thought this gift would bring us closer And I thought this gift would bring us closer together, 'cause you guys are this gift would bring us closer together, 'cause you guys are like my family.
Together, 'cause you guys are like my family.
That's what the holidays are all like my family.
That's what the holidays are all about family.
That's what the holidays are all about family.
About family.
Anyways, since there's nothing Anyways, since there's nothing good left to steal, I'll just anyways, since there's nothing good left to steal, I'll just take this one.
Good left to steal, I'll just take this one.
Mordecai, rigby, others, you have ruined the spirit of the white elephant gift exchange.
Have ruined the spirit of the white elephant gift exchange.
Now you get to spend all of white elephant gift exchange.
Now you get to spend all of eternity in my temple of gifts.
Now you get to spend all of eternity in my temple of gifts.
P.
S.
You don't get to open eternity in my temple of gifts.
P.
S.
You don't get to open the gifts.
P.
S.
You don't get to open the gifts.
Aw, man! The gifts.
Aw, man! Look, I know we went Aw, man! Look, I know we went a little overboard with the Look, I know we went a little overboard with the prank gift for muscle man, but a little overboard with the prank gift for muscle man, but did you see the ones he gave prank gift for muscle man, but did you see the ones he gave us the ranch dressing, the did you see the ones he gave us the ranch dressing, the sweaters, the underwear gloves?! Us the ranch dressing, the sweaters, the underwear gloves?! I could go on.
Sweaters, the underwear gloves?! I could go on.
You're not supposed to get I could go on.
You're not supposed to get gifts you like.
You're not supposed to get gifts you like.
You're supposed to give gifts gifts you like.
You're supposed to give gifts you don't like.
You're supposed to give gifts you don't like.
That's what makes it fun.
You don't like.
That's what makes it fun.
Except you had to go and rig the that's what makes it fun.
Except you had to go and rig the game and get revenge.
Except you had to go and rig the game and get revenge.
Well, I hope you're happy with game and get revenge.
Well, I hope you're happy with yourselves.
Well, I hope you're happy with yourselves.
I guess he's right.
Yourselves.
I guess he's right.
Maybe we got too hung up on it.
I guess he's right.
Maybe we got too hung up on it.
It really is just a maybe we got too hung up on it.
It really is just a silly game, after all.
It really is just a silly game, after all.
And he did give us silly game, after all.
And he did give us that sweet TV.
And he did give us that sweet TV.
Yeah.
That sweet TV.
Yeah.
Muscle man was just trying to Yeah.
Muscle man was just trying to have a good time, and maybe muscle man was just trying to have a good time, and maybe that's what we should do, too.
Have a good time, and maybe that's what we should do, too.
Mr.
white elephant, sir That's what we should do, too.
Mr.
White elephant, sir Yes? Mr.
white elephant, sir Yes? Send us back so yes? Send us back so we can stop muscle man from Send us back so we can stop muscle man from opening that gift.
We can stop muscle man from opening that gift.
Well, I don't know.
Opening that gift.
Well, I don't know.
I've never really done that well, I don't know.
I've never really done that before.
I've never really done that before.
I suppose you could go home, or before.
I suppose you could go home, or you could see what's in this I suppose you could go home, or you could see what's in this box.
You could see what's in this box.
Can we see what's in box.
Can we see what's in it first? Can we see what's in it first? Oww! It first? Oww! No, thanks.
Oww! No, thanks.
I think we'll just go home.
No, thanks.
I think we'll just go home.
Fine.
- I think we'll just go home.
- Fine.
- Fine.
- Muscle man, wait.
Muscle man, wait.
What is it, bro? Muscle man, wait.
What is it, bro? Well, the truth is == What is it, bro? Well, the truth is == Benson, wait! Well, the truth is == Benson, wait! It's not a TV! Benson, wait! It's not a TV! It's just a box full of old it's not a TV! It's just a box full of old Chinese food! It's just a box full of old Chinese food! What?! Chinese food! What?! Huh? What?! Huh? Huh? Gotcha, bros! Gotcha, bros! Heartfelt speech gets 'em every gotcha, bros! Heartfelt speech gets 'em every time! Heartfelt speech gets 'em every time! Time! What were you gonna say, Benson? What were you gonna say, Benson? Enjoy opening that what were you gonna say, Benson? Enjoy opening that gift.
Enjoy opening that gift.
[ In slow gift.
Okay, bro.
Okay, bro.
- [ Motion .]
Okay, bro.
- have a Holly jolly have a Holly jolly Christmas have a Holly jolly Christmas it's the best time of Christmas it's the best time of the year it's the best time of the year I don't know if there'll be the year I don't know if there'll be snow, but have a cup of cheer I don't know if there'll be snow, but have a cup of cheer have a Holly jolly Christmas Snow, but have a cup of cheer have a Holly jolly Christmas and when you walk down have a Holly jolly Christmas and when you walk down the street and when you walk down the street say hello to friends you know the street say hello to friends you know and everyone you meet say hello to friends you know and everyone you meet ho ho, the mistletoe And everyone you meet ho ho, the mistletoe hung where you can see ho ho, the mistletoe hung where you can see somebody waits for you hung where you can see somebody waits for you kiss her once for me somebody waits for you kiss her once for me have a Holly jolly Christmas kiss her once for me have a Holly jolly Christmas and in case you didn't hear have a Holly jolly Christmas and in case you didn't hear oh, by golly, have a Holly and in case you didn't hear oh, by golly, have a Holly jolly Christmas this year oh, by golly, have a Holly jolly Christmas this year have a Holly jolly jolly Christmas this year have a Holly jolly Christmas have a Holly jolly Christmas it's the best time of Christmas it's the best time of the year it's the best time of the year Have a Holly jolly Christmas and when you walk Christmas and when you walk Now, this is fun! And when you walk Now, this is fun! - Now, this is fun! - say hello to friends you say hello to friends you know and everyone you meet say hello to friends you know and everyone you meet ho ho, the mistletoe Know and everyone you meet ho ho, the mistletoe hung where you can see ho ho, the mistletoe hung where you can see somebody waits for you hung where you can see somebody waits for you Somebody waits for you kiss her once