Camp Wannakiki (2018) s06e10 Episode Script

1
[upbeat music]
- Betty, why did you
bring us out here?
- Yeah, what is this place?
Some sort of a ThunderDome?
- It's a basketball
court, you nitwits.
You know, I figured
since we have our campers
doing friendly competitions
every day, that'd be good
for us to give it a try.
- Yeah, that way
you could better
understand their mental state.
- I don't even understand
my three personalities
and you expect me to
understand the campers?
- Oh, you gotta start somewhere.
Anyway, the name of
the game is Horse.
- Whores?
- Oh, I'm gonna be good at this.
- No, I got this one.
Lemme go get my waterproof wig.
- Oh, get my cat o' nine
tails and my handcuffs.
- No, not whores,
you stupid whores.
Horse, you know,
like neigh neigh.
- Oh, there's role playing too?
- Like Furries. Go get
my ostrich feathers.
- No, it's a ball game.
- Yeah, you try to
get the same basket
as the person before you.
- Are there going to be
enough baskets for everyone?
- Yeah, when I play with balls,
I like to have my own basket.
- No, you have to throw
the ball in the hoop.
If you get it, the
next person has
to try from the same spot.
If you don't, you get a letter.
- And then the first person
to get the word,
horse is the loser.
- Wait, the whore is the loser?
- That doesn't sound right.
You get laid, you get paid
and you are the loser?
What sort of a demonic
Republican hell is this?
- Yeah, when I get some money
and some honey,
I'm a winner, baby.
- Oh no. Just watch.
Every time I get the ball in
the hoop, you try to copy me.
[upbeat music]
[audience clapping]
- [Both] Wowie zowie.
She's on fire.
[upbeat music continues]
- See? Now, you try.
- Oh no, that's like some
coordination crazy stuff. No.
- Can't we just go back
to doing the whole,
who's the biggest
whore thing instead?
- Honestly, I don't
even know why I try.
- Me either.
- It's like she
doesn't even know us.
Camp it up at Camp Wannakiki
[birds chirping]
[upbeat music]
- Where the hell do you
think they're shipping us to?
- I don't know. I just took
the bag off of my head.
- You shouldn't have, sweetie.
- I swear to God there's
a Hamburger Mary's out
in one of these corn fields.
- You think so?
- We're going to the
Cornfield Mary's.
- Yum.
[upbeat music continues]
- It's our last daily
activity and all I have to do
to become the next camp champ
is roll around in horse shit.
- I can't wait to be
back in the saddle.
I think we're gonna ride horses.
The only problem is the
bit. It's not my favorite.
- I heard something
about barebacking.
I think I'm gonna do really well
at this daily camp activity.
- Howdy, campers.
- [All] Howdy, Ruthie.
- Welcome to Trident Farm.
We're here today with Pam,
who's one of the
owners of the farm.
Pam, thanks for having us.
- We're really happy
to have you guys.
Welcome to Trident.
- We're so excited.
Pam, why don't you tell us a
little bit about Trident Farm?
- So Trident Farm is a
hunter jumper show barn.
We specialize in taking people
who have never ridden all the
way up to competing in shows
and we've been here
for about 16 years.
- Amazing.
Now, I believe you said
the farm is situated
on over 60 acres.
- [Pam] We have 60 acres
and almost 60 horses here.
- Almost 60 horses. Did
you hear that, campers?
- Yes.
- Wow.
- So Pam, I think before
we let our campers loose
on the farm with your
horses, it might be best
to sort of check
out their skills
and see what we're dealing with.
What do you think?
- I think that's
a fantastic idea.
And we have a little
exercise set up
in our indoor riding
arena for you guys.
- That's right, campers.
So for the first part of
today's daily activity,
we're gonna do a
little hobby horsing
and see what sort
of skills you got.
What do you say?
- [All] Let's work.
- Giddy up, giddy up.
- Oh. There's a dog.
- There's animals everywhere.
[upbeat music]
[quirky music]
- I heard we're gonna
be hobby horsing.
I have no fucking
clue what that is.
- Okay, campers, can you trot?
There we are.
Nice, nice.
My little fillies.
- Side saddle only. I'm a lady.
Neigh, bitches.
- There we go. LuLu.
- It seems familiar.
- And Patty.
- I'm hot to trot.
- Very nice job. Get
your gallop on, girls.
- All the animals start
screeching and growling
when I try to approach them
so I guess I'm just
gonna ride this.
- Can you canter?
- Yes, I can.
- I can canter while I canter.
Jesus Christ was born this day.
- Look at you
campers, looking good.
Add leg ladies, add leg.
Squeeze 'em forward.
Look at Nutella. LuLu, great.
Oh, you're in sync.
Trot it out, girls. Trot it out.
And there we have
it. Look at that
Charlie's Angels of
the barn yard set.
Okay, campers, what do you
say we put your new skills
to the test and
have a little race?
All right, on your
mark, get set, go.
Campers.
- You're coming down, slags.
- No, that is not
a regulation trot.
Add leg, add leg.
- What?
- There we go. Catch
up, Patty, come on.
- Add leg, more leg.
- Forward. There we are.
Wow.
- Watch out for
Ruthie's keister.
- Nutella's clearly in the
lead. Here come the others.
Nutella's in the lead.
- Hurry on, Patty.
- Oh my gosh.
- Campers, campers.
It's okay. It's okay.
- It's Nutella in the lead.
Oh, Nutella followed by
Patty and LuLu by her hair.
- It looks like
I'm best in show.
Come on Caramel, let's
go claim my prize.
Giddy up.
- Boy, they are really
loving those riding props.
- How are the results
of this weighted
in my Camp Champ score card?
[upbeat music]
- All right, campers, it's time
to meet your new horse friends.
- Oh, what?
- So first up we have Lena.
Lena is a 23-year-old
quarter horse
and a semi-retired
show jumping horse.
And I believe she
goes with LuLu today.
- [Ruthie] That's correct.
LuLu, this is your
horse for the day.
- Oh, hello Lena.
Oh, I love her.
- Next up, we have Normandy.
Normandy is a 13-year-old
Friesian Sport horse.
She's a former trail
horse turned show horse
and I believe she belongs
to Nutella this afternoon.
- Oh my goodness.
Hello, Normandy.
- And last but certainly
not least, we have Jet.
Jet is a 5-year-old
imported Irish sport horse
and he is super happy to
be helping Patty today.
- Yay.
- Oh Patty, the Irish horse.
- Top of the morning.
- All right campers,
let's get some helmets on
and let's start horsing around.
- Woo.
- Oh yeah.
- Wait, where do
we put our helmets?
- [Ruthie] The staff
at Trident Farm
has devised a little steeple
chase for you campers.
First you'll trot around
the rainbow circle,
then you'll canter if you can,
over to the trans pride box
before slithering
through the slaloms.
Finally grab a beanbag from
me and place it on the barrel.
Okay, campers.
- You know Jet, I always saw
us together in the top two.
I always knew it would be us.
This way, this way.
Hello everybody, this is Jet
and Jet is from Ireland
where they talk like this.
I'll work on it.
We gotta do the gay circle, Jet.
Come on. Go that way.
Go that way, buddy.
Yeah, that's a good boy, Jet.
Yeah, walk over that.
Yeah, walk over that.
Walk over that. Walk over that.
[poop sounds]
Walk over that. Walk over that.
I'm squeezing you like
a tube of toothpaste
with my legs like
I was instructed.
Come on.
[poop sounds]
Oh sure, sure.
I didn't wanna do that either.
Jet, we gotta stop
in the trans box.
Okay, you're gender fluid,
Jet. That's fine too.
Whatever you want.
It's beautiful, Jet.
We gotta go to Ruthie.
Come on. Go to Ruthie.
Look, it's a big carrot.
- Come on.
Oh my God, you're so big.
Hi. Okay, there we go.
All right. Good luck.
I would like to request
that you go there
so move that way.
- Oh, okay. Oh,
we're so close, Jet.
- [Ruthie] Toss your
bean bag on the bucket.
Yay.
- Get the bean bag, Jet.
Did I get my horseplay badge?
Do I have to dress up like Jet
at the talent show tonight?
How many episodes are left?
- It's not our first
rodeo. [chuckles]
Isn't that right, Normandy?
Hello everyone, this
is Normandy. Hi.
I too was a French girl.
- [Ruthie] Oh, Normandy,
look how beautiful you are.
- We're gonna go
around this circle.
Good, Normandy. Yes, Normandy
- [Ruthie] Nutella,
you're a champ.
- I try.
There we go.
Ooh, let's stop over here
and visit our trans brothers
and sisters, shall we?
Park, park.
Bravo, darling. Walk on.
All right. Here we go.
Let's go through these.
[upbeat music]
- [Ruthie] Take a
beanbag. Take a beanbag.
- Bravo, bravo and park.
Bravo. Hold, hold,
hold, hold, hold, hold.
Easy as pie.
Nothing can stop us. Walk on.
[upbeat music]
I have been known to horse
around once or twice,
but I think today
was an absolute riot.
- Okay Lena, let's
do this, sister.
See those poles? This way.
So we just met my horse.
This is Lena and we're gonna
be best friends, huh Lena?
And we're gonna
kick some ass today.
Get your snack, girl.
Get your snack on, okay, before
we get out there. Good job.
Don't make me look bad, Lena.
Be patient with me, okay?
I've never done this
before. Good job.
Go over. Okay, go over it.
Nope. This way.
This way, please.
Now we gotta line ourselves up.
Okay, there you go.
Good job, sweetie.
Lena so pretty.
Now go this way.
Okay, now in the box.
Good girl. Okay, now stop.
Thank you. Okay, let's go.
We got this, girl.
We make a great team, Lena.
What do you say we
ditch these mofos
and head back to the camp?
- [Ruthie] Lena and
LuLu, you're almost done.
- Okay, now straight to Ruthie.
Snatch her wig,
Lena. Snatch her wig.
- [Ruthie] Lena, you wouldn't.
- No, she's too sweet.
Okay, let's stop here
so I can get my bean bag.
- Here we go.
You're gonna get a beanbag.
- I want green.
- There you go.
- No yellow, Lena.
It matches my
outfit. Okay, ready?
We gotta put the
beanbag on the barrel.
Ready, here we go.
Okay, good girl.
Okay, straight on till
morning, Lena. Go, go.
I learned so much today. See?
[imitates whinnying]
Now I'm like a a horse girl.
- Campers, did you
have a good time?
- [All] Yeah.
- Pam, thank you and
everyone at Trident Farm
for having us today.
- You're very welcome
and you guys are welcome
to come back and
play with us anytime.
- Well, be careful
what you wish for.
Okay, campers, it's time
to get back in the van
and we gotta head back to camp
for tonight's talent show.
- Wait, wait for me.
[horse neighs]
Okay, mush.
- Oh my goodness.
It's Miss Texas 1988.
[audience clapping]
- Howdy there, Ruthie.
I hear one of these here campers
is aiming to take my crown.
- Well yeah, that's pretty much
how this whole thing works.
- Well listen here, vermin.
I'm the Camp Champ
in these here parts.
Y'all think you've got what
it takes to amp the camp?
- Yes.
- Yeah.
- I reckon I ought
to have a say in
it, don't you think?
- [Ruthie] I reckon so.
- Well then I'll see y'all
at the They Them Theirs
Talent show world.
All right.
Hi ho Silver. I'm gay.
- Bye.
- It's the truth. I used my
prize money to buy a horse.
This is all I could afford.
[upbeat music]
[upbeat music]
- Good evening and welcome
to the Final Talent Show
of Camp Wannakiki Season Six.
- Tonight, we crown
our next Camp Champ.
- Miss Texas 1988,
can you believe it's been
a whole year already?
- It went by so fast.
I'm in total shock.
I thought about keeping
the crown for myself, but
after seeing these campers,
I'm welcoming any of them
to pry it from my
cold dead hands.
- Oh, that's okay, honey.
We've got another
one right here.
- Oh, well in that case,
let's start the show.
[upbeat music]
- [Amber] Let's just say
this isn't a dolly bride
for someone you love or respect.
Her box is a little
beat up and well used.
But is she exclusive? Well, no.
Is she a designer? Also no.
Her niece probably left
her in a box of crayons
on a hot summer day
and just gave her a rinse before
selling her off to Goodwill.
It takes a lot of money
to look this cheap
and a whole city to get
a queen to summer camp.
This discount doll look
is to show appreciation
to everyone back home
who helped me pull together
the resources to get me here.
But she's here, she's queer
and so, so proud of herself.
I love you, Houston.
- [Martina] You can take
the girl out of Vegas,
but you can't take the
Vegas out of the girl.
All the feathers
and sequins a drag queen
could ever ask for.
I'm a shining example
of Vegas energy in the
most unexpected places.
The other day, walking down
the Strip, someone yelled,
"Hey Martina, you
are of a vajazzle."
I said, "How am
I of a vajazzle?"
They said, "That's
the technical term
for a sequins on a cunt."
To that I replied, "Well, I
do wear a lot of sequins."
So let's have fun tonight
filled with laughter,
echoing through the camp,
celebrating each
and everyone's drag
and making every
moment unforgettable.
- [Ivanna] Viva
Las Peessa, baby.
You can never get enough Peessa
and I'm feeling lucky tonight.
I am wearing a head
to toe custom outfit.
These gloves are
made by a good sister
who gave me some of my first
bookings in Asbury Park.
The headpiece and
gown are created
by two fabulous
designers in Baltimore.
I may have started
as a simple pie,
but now I'm extra extra
large, extra cheesy,
extra pepperoni, extra glamour,
extra campy, extra cunty.
Ivannna Peessa
coming for the crown.
Ding, ding, ding. Order up.
[upbeat music]
- [You'neek] I've never
been to Sissy Square,
but look at what I'm wearing.
For my final talent show,
I wanted to showcase a look
that has been a dream
of mine for years.
This looks encompasses
my unique mix of glamour
and impeccable comedic timing.
I always pride myself on looking
gorgeous and acting stupid.
And this talent
show is just that.
And one last thing, Betty,
you have a swamp ass.
[upbeat music]
- [Rip Em] Here are two key
facts to get to know me.
I love listening to music
that was made before
I was even conceived
and I love to break
the gender binary.
I feel like this look
is totally serving that
as a two for one special.
There are so many great
queer icons to thank
for having the means
to express gender
and sexuality the way we do.
And just like the divas that
came before me, I'm just trying
to leave the world a little
gayer than I found it.
[upbeat music]
- [Stevie] I am intergalactic.
I am out of this world.
But more than that,
I am self-made.
When the stars don't
align for you, it's time
to journey out into space
and find ones that do.
Am I a man? Am I a woman?
Am I human? Am I alien?
No, I am gender.
And gender is a galaxy.
- [Hanna] Welp,
cats out of the bag.
Using only the bare necessities
and hounding for a chance to
make a mammoth impression,
I sheepishly made my
way to Camp Wannakiki.
Feeling froggy, I leaped
into the competition
not knowing what to expect
but with my ducks in a row
and my campy can-do attitude,
I waddled my way to the top,
flowering new friendships
and creating memories
along the way.
Thank you, Camp Wannakiki.
This will always be an amazing
experience I will hold dear.
- [Bee Bop] Bee Bop is here
to blow up the competition.
I knew ever since
You'neek beat my ass,
I was gonna be the
star of Camp Wannakiki.
I solved murder mysteries
and I was even
waterboarded on the pier.
And no matter what, I'm
gonna show everybody
why I'm out of this world.
Bee Bop is gonna put
the bop in your beep.
[upbeat music]
- And now the Camp Wannakiki
Season Six finalists.
[audience clapping]
- [Patty] Camp Champ?
More like Camp Lamp.
Patty Bourree has time
traveled yet again,
but this time it's
right into the hearts
of the viewers at home.
Hi, mom.
No matter where she goes,
Patty Bourree is sure
to light up the room
and electrify the crowd.
Camp Wannakiki has
been no different.
Being here at camp,
she's learned insert,
"inspiring lesson here."
Oh shit, I never got a
round to self-reflection.
Anyways, hey, Sugarbakers,
I've got a bright idea.
Why not crown Patty Bourree
the next Camp Champ?
[audience cheering and clapping]
- [LuLu] Florals for the
finale? Groundbreaking.
Prepare to be pedal struck
by the floral fabulousness
strutting on this stage.
It's the grand finale
and this fierce queen has
blossomed into a bouquet
of brilliance, stemtastic
elegance, petal perfection,
and a scent of sassy.
This queen has got what it
takes to be the next Camp Champ.
Stop and smell the slay.
Sashay, bouquet.
[audience clapping]
- [Nutella] Grab your
popcorn, it's time for a show.
Nutella Fitzgerald is the
embodiment of old Hollywood,
but without the racism.
For years, Black icons have
been shoved to the background
of scenes and forced to
play only slaves, servants,
and side characters.
But times are changing.
Everyday Ebony entertainers
are breaking box office records
and winning countless awards.
That's why today I hope to
keep you all reeling, inspired
by the power of Josephine
Baker, the poise
of Dorothy Dandridge and
the tenacity of Eartha Kitt.
So lights, camera, action.
Nutella's ready
for the spotlight.
After all, every beautiful
movie does end in black.
- Wow, can I just say this
is a stunning top three?
- Absolutely.
- Gorgeous.
You three are our
finalists for season six
and I could not be more happy
or proud for all of you.
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
- Every single season, I am
thrilled with our finalists.
And I'm not just saying that
because I'm supposed to.
I really mean that.
Every season I'm
thrilled with them
and you three are
absolutely no exception.
- Thank you.
- I can't believe it.
We're finally here.
- Yeah, looking at
all three of you.
It really me wanna give up
the crown, the crown.
I wanna give up the
crown. I'm sorry.
- God, It's like
- Each of you represent
like a different aspect
of drag and camp so well.
It really showcases that the
whole season has done this
and you as a top three
really highlight that
in such a beautiful spectrum.
- Thank you
- LuLu Krystals, wow, you are
doing Denver proud tonight.
- Don't you know it?
Yeah, opposite track record
of any Denver contestant.
- The Denver curse
is certainly broken.
- It is broken, baby.
- You look stunning
today from head to toe.
I loved every single bit of it.
- LuLu, tonight you
are in full bloom.
And I mean, I can smell
you from here, but
Woo, there.
- I'll waft it for you.
- You've had such a great run
and I'm so happy
to see you up here.
- Thank you.
This has been such a wild ride,
but I have absolutely
no regrets.
I wouldn't do
anything different.
This experience has really
taught me that I am valid,
that everyone's drag is valid,
and everyone has a spot
in the world of drag.
And yeah, it was just a
reaffirmation of I am enough.
This has been so
amazing. Thank you.
Thank you. Thank you.
- LuLu, this headpiece
all the way down,
but like that really, I
can't stop staring at it
so big and glorious and floral
and yeah, you are just so
floral and elegant and lovely.
I love the reveal.
I'm stoked to see you up here
and your craftiness and
your glamour altogether.
- Thank you. Thank you.
- LuLu, I look
forward to everything
that you bring to
the stage every day.
I think you're so creative
and I think you're so funny
and so wonderful
and I'm just so happy that
you are up there right now.
- Nutella Fitzgerald, doing
Chicago proud this season.
- Yes ma'am.
- I do love a good film
noir. I mean, come on.
- Me too.
- Tell us, how are
you feeling right now?
- I feel great. I am
having the time of my life.
I am just overwhelmed
with emotions,
but extremely happy to be here
and I'm just enjoying
it with my friends.
- Yeah, this look is
amazing and very unexpected
and also very Nutella
because it's smart and witty
and you delivered it so well.
- Thank you.
- Nutella, whew. This just, wow.
The concept, the execution,
it's very stunning,
not "fin" for you.
I'm sure you have a lot
of wonderful things ahead.
- Thank you.
- And I will take a bite out
of that chocolate bar, please.
- That is fine. I
have several, yes.
- This gown just represents
you and your time here.
It's beautiful, it's tailored.
The silhouette is
perfect on you,
but yet it is campy
that it lights up
and you've got the
popcorn and the chocolate
and the Camp Wannakiki logo
is on the chocolate bar.
And then you made us laugh.
Even though you're wearing this
beautiful, incredible piece
of art, you still made us laugh.
This to me is you and it is
just absolutely top notch.
- I'm just very
thrilled to be here
because my version of camp is
not always welcome back at home
and it's nice to
see it validated
and just to have the opportunity
to spread joy and love
with all my fellow campers
and I'm also learning
from them as well.
And to be in a community
of people that show love
and acceptance, no matter
who you are as a person
and what you have to
offer is incredible
and I thank each and
every one of you.
- The range that you have
presented has been outstanding.
It's just been so
amazing just seeing
every single consistent
performance from you.
- Thank you so much.
- Patty Bourree, my goodness.
I think I've seen this lamp
at every single antique
store, rummage sale,
estate sale ever.
I got it instantly.
My ex took ours with him.
Thank God 'cause
I didn't like it
but I love this.
- But it's back.
- But I love this.
You are just consistency
in everything you do.
You are just so consistent,
whether it's looks
or quality or humor
or what have you, you are
just the queen of consistency.
And I'll tell you, that
gets you real far in life.
- Thank you.
Unfortunately, I'm still
feeling like a villain in this.
- You're looking a
little villainous,
but you know, everyone
loves a villain.
- I think this look is
so incredibly glampy
because it has a glamorous
element to it, despite the,
you know, ridiculousness of it.
- For example, the light
bulb pair is brilliant.
You're definitely the
queen of lamp today.
The lamp champ.
- I would say she really
knows how to amp up her lamp.
- I wrote that down.
Amp up her lamp, oh.
- I'm feeling good tonight
but I'm also just
waiting for you guys
to be like, "We hated
you the whole time
and you don't deserve to
be here," bucket of blood.
- Oh god, she's on to us.
Cancel the blood drop.
- If you wanna do
that, please do it now
because I'm so appreciative of
all your kind words tonight.
I think that the experience
of being at camp
really taught me
that as a drag artist, I
don't need to stand on my own
and I can let other people in
and be a collaborator.
And that is a risk I haven't
always been willing to take.
And the campers here
have really taught me
that it's a risk that I am
willing to learn to take.
- My face absolutely lit up
when I saw you come out here.
- Oh, Miss Texas.
- I love this look.
The use of the different
patterns is perfect.
Trailing that cord behind is
yeah, absolutely hilarious.
Yeah, great look.
- You three campers have been
so consistent all season.
In fact, I can't
remember a day that one
or both of you have
not been in the top.
I mean it's just gonna be
such a hard decision to make.
But there is only
one Camp Champ badge.
But before we get to that,
let's take a look at
your journey so far.
Oh, I think we moved it.
It's over here now.
Oh, it's over here now?
Oh, peekaboo.
[timer beeping]
[upbeat music]
- The synthetic blonde unit.
- [Nutella] Hello
peasants, plebeians
and my little pin cushions.
- If it's not crystal clear
already, let's get to the point.
- Everyone's virginity
is safe from us.
[balloon pops]
- Well, it hit a star.
- Ah, okay.
- Step right up
to see Bonnie, the
bouncing bimbo ballerina
in her death testifying
tightrope walking act.
- The human cannon ball,
Miss Red, White, and Boobs.
- Mrs. Patty Bourree ran
away with the circus.
- So congratulations,
Nutella Fitzgerald.
- Thank you.
[fart noises]
- Just take a sip of me.
- So tonight, congratulations,
Patty Bourree.
- Thank you. Thank you so much.
- It's me, Salvador Dali Parton.
- Puppies playing poker.
I've got a full house.
- Congratulations,
LuLu Krystals.
- Thank you.
- You are the winner of the
Artsy Fartsy Day at Camp.
[upbeat music continues]
[water splashes]
[bowling pins clatter]
- Octopussy is the hardest
working marine biologist
at her marine biology workplace.
- Honk honk, beep beep. Make
way for this queen of the road.
- Congratulations,
Patty Bourree.
- Thank you.
- Knock, knock. Got wood?
You can never keep a hoe down
or away from an
udderly fab crown.
- And today that winner
is Nutella Fitzgerald.
Congratulations.
- Thank you so much. I
really appreciate it.
- My husband,
Straightist Whiteson
is the second best poacher/CEO
I've ever been married to.
- Welcome to the jungle.
- I came here to shut down
Camp Wannakiki. [laughs]
Have you ever
heard of the ranger
who was here before
Ranger Danger?
Ranger Bubble Butt.
- And today that
winner is LuLu Krystals
and her ghoul pal, Meredith.
- The whole class bowed
down when Patty barked,
"Hey, guess what, losers?
I am the queen of
this here playground."
- And I'm gonna start
with today's winner,
Nutella Fitzgerald.
- Penelope Pencil present.
- It really has been a
magical journey all season
at Camp Wannakiki.
Any one of you would make
a fantastic Camp Champ.
But as you know, there is only
one final Camp Champ Badge.
So you three can
wait in the rec room
while we make one more
final tough decision.
- All right, all
right, all right.
- You got it, babes.
Maybe, it's a tie.
- I mean, you never know.
- Maybe it's a tie this season
Maybe it's a triplet tie.
- Well, well, well.
- That was some show.
That was fabulous.
- I think that no shade
to any previous season,
but I think that might
have been the best finale.
- Well, fine.
[all laugh]
- You know, I started
by saying no shade
so that means whatever
I say is okay, right?
- I forgot you were here.
- I get that a lot. It's fine.
- Miss Texas, how do
you think today went?
- That was incredible.
After seeing those three,
I'm ready to give up
the crown, the crown, I'm
ready to give up the crown.
- Not drag and not
horseback riding either.
The way you galloped
in this afternoon.
That was a fun daily activity.
I'm glad you were
able to pop in.
- I loved my horse.
He had really big
eyes, a big nose
and a really big tail.
- Ooh, let's talk
about our top three.
I mean, I gotta say Miss
Texas, you would have loved
to see all of these campers
throughout the season.
I said it to the campers before,
but the three on
the stage have been
the most consistent
throughout this entire season.
Literally every day one or
two of them were in the top.
- They were just terrific the
whole time they were at camp.
I adored all three of them.
- It was so cute to see two
of my season's daughters
up there avenging them.
[all laugh]
I was flabbergasted. This
was incredible to watch.
This season has really
amped up the camp,
so you have a a great top three
and I can't wait to
see the whole season.
- Did you have a favorite
standout look tonight?
- Nutella, absolutely
showstopper.
That was such an
incredible look.
The concept, I hadn't
seen anything like it.
And she is just such a
grounded stage presence
so it's really, whew,
gives me chills.
- Everything that we get
from Nutella every time
is absolutely fantastic.
Tonight was no exception.
I actually wrote on
my little score sheet,
"Nutella, I am dying,"
because it was just
so terrific tonight.
- It was a good day for Nutella
and it was a good
season for Nutella.
She's had such poise, and the
construction on her garments
like day in, day out have
just been impeccable.
If you think of her
season as a film,
this being the
big finale finale,
she's kind of tied a
little bow on it tonight.
- And you know what else
she gives us every night?
Pure camp.
- Yes.
- Well, let's talk
about LuLu Krystals.
She had a wonderful
look tonight.
She looked stunning.
That headpiece.
I thought that Ivanna Peessa
was gonna jump out of her seat
and come snatch it
'cause it was so good.
- She's also had a
very consistent run.
And just the attitude
and it's just funny.
The smile is always there.
Campy can-do attitude
is always there
whether it's the daily activity
or the talent show, just been
a delight to have all season.
- Kooky girl, friendly,
great entertainer.
She really deserves to
be in this top three.
- I love me some Dixie
Krystals, of course
and it was so cool to
see her daughter come out
and also be so uniquely herself.
At the end when she said,
that this process has
helped her realize
that she is enough,
I really hope she sticks
with that 'cause she is.
She has something
really unique about her
that's phenomenal to see.
- She's more than enough.
- Yeah.
- And then we had Patty Bourree
every single night just
giving us show stopping looks.
I love the lamp look today.
- She has got that
cabaret vibe to her
and she's very varied
in her presentations,
but there's an element of Patty
in everything that you see.
And I think that's really smart.
And I think that tonight
as her show stopping finale
look just was like the icing
on the cake.
I thought it was really,
really cute, really clever.
- She is really smart.
In fact, I think
she's probably one
of the smartest campers
that we've had here.
I think she really-
- Miss Texas is right here.
- It's fine. I'm dumb I know.
- She knew how to
like play the game
and she knew how to really
make herself stand out at camp.
Tonight's costume is a
great example of that.
- I love trash, but I can
deeply appreciate polish
and she just has
that full detail
and I love that
she does that while
keeping it so campy, having
that little cord at the bottom,
being a lamp.
I loved it.
- So what y'all are saying is
that we have no idea who
should win the Camp Champ.
- I guess I'll just keep
the crown. It's fine.
- Problem solved.
But speaking of fabulous crowns,
Miss Texas 1988,
thank you so much
for joining us here at the table
and this afternoon
riding a big steed.
- Thank you all so much.
It was truly a treat
to come back to camp.
I love you all.
I love this whole
place, this experience,
and I'm so thrilled for
the next Camp Champ.
- Oh, thank you, Miss Texas.
- [Announcer] The
winner of Camp Wannakiki
will receive a
stupendous prize package,
including Itza Pola, a
fabulous custom foam wig
by season four
camper, Pola Frost.
Shimmer and Shine with a year's
supply of glittery makeup
by Elektra Cosmetics.
Set sail, baby. An all
expense paid cruise
provided by Dream Vacations
and Adventures By Maps dot com.
All this and $10,000
in cold hard cash
provided by Hamburger Mary's,
where you can eat,
drink, and be Mary baby.
- This finale is so incredible.
The top three are
absolutely amazing.
- Every single entertainer
on that stage has fought
for that place and
deserves to be there.
And no matter who is
crowned Camp Champ,
this season is gonna have
a great representation.
- It's a little hard to gauge
who's gonna be our Camp Champ,
because I'm only
here for two days,
but I put both dollars
I have on Nutella.
- My girl, LuLu,
she is a dark horse
and she is going to
make her mother proud
and take that crown
back to Denver
and then I'll come
back from Vegas
and steal it from her. [laughs]
- I really hope this year,
we have a person of
color win Camp Wannakiki.
- Unfortunately,
there can only be one
and I personally think that
it needs to be Nutella.
She's incredible, she's
sweet, she's kind,
and everything she does
is just so perfect.
- None of them. Bee
Bop is going to win.
- Shortly before tonight's
talent show, our campers voted
for the individual they felt
was the most congenial camper
this season at Camp Wannakiki.
I am thrilled to say
that the individual
who earned the coveted
Most Congenial Badge is
Hanna Barbera.
[audience cheering and clapping]
- Congratulations. You've
just earned $500 cash.
- Congratulations,
Hanna. Here you are.
Come on, give it up for Hanna.
[audience cheering and clapping]
- Thank you, friends. I
really, really appreciate it.
I can't believe it.
I'm gonna keep this forever.
Thank you so much.
- We're gonna keep
you forever, babe.
- Yeah.
- Thank you all so
much. I love you all.
- Oh, congratulations.
- Congratulations.
[audience cheering and clapping]
- Congratulations.
- And now the time has come.
Let's bring back our
top three finalists
of Camp Wannakiki Season Six.
[audience cheering and clapping]
And now let's hear it
for our reigning Camp
Champ, Miss Texas 1988.
[audience cheering and clapping]
- I have something I wanna say.
When I first came to
camp, I was afraid,
but then I mustard
up the courage
to be crowned the big
wiener of season five.
I am so glad I got
to come back to camp
and ketchup with everyone.
And I want to remind you
all to relish these moments
because after this, your
opportunities will be abundant.
Whether you win or lose, I
just want you all to know
that in my heart, you're
a bunch of wieners.
- And the winner of
Camp Wannakiki Season
Six Camp Champ is
Nutella Fitzgerald.
[audience cheering and clapping]
- Oh yeah, baby.
Oh, yes darling.
- Black don't crack.
[audience cheering and clapping]
- Period.
Camp it up at Camp Wannakiki
- Cherry.
- Cherry.
The name of the game is Horse.
- Whores?
- That's my line.
Why would you? [laughs]
- I am not too fond of a bridle,
but the bit is the worst part.
- [Crew Member] Can you
do it again real quick?
That horse is pissing
right behind you.
- Oh great.
- I'm sorry.
- Good evening and welcome
to the Final Talent Show
of Camp Wannakiki Season Six.
- [Videographer Bailey] You're
kind of covering Miss Texas.
- That's fine.
- But how is this?
- How is this?
- All right, try that again.
- Just step up
and push us aside.
We're not used to
sharing a stage.
- [Bailey] Okay, that's a wrap
on Camp Wannakiki Season Six.
[audience cheering and clapping]