The Sopranos s06e11 Episode Script

So every time I asked you "how's work?" and you said "fine," you were having your own private little joke on me? What's going on? I went to Blockbuster today to rent "Cinderella Man" - And guess what? - Is it still a classic? I found out that our son the liar had been fired three weeks ago.
From Blockbuster? how the fuck do you do that? They got rhesus monkeys working as managers over there.
He was taking promotional items and selling them posters, standups.
Standees! This whole thing's bullshit.
Most of that stuff gets thrown out anyway.
The store's policy was very clear.
Well maybe I care about the environment.
Did that ever occur to you? "Wallace and Gromit," I mean that weighed like 50 lbs.
How many trees gave their lives for that? - It just goes to the dump.
- Can I come home to a peaceful house one goddamn night? You tell me to think like a businessman, yet every time I do there's something wrong.
I made money promoting pArties in high school, that was no good.
- Now this.
- You know what I think? all those days you go in late, you call in sick, you deserve to get canned.
The worst part is you don't even give a shit.
What, I should care about Blockbuster? fucking religious fanatics! - I can't live on what they pay me anyway.
- Why not?! You live at home! We feed you! You have a social life but I can't? You have any idea what it costs at a decent club in New York? It's $500 for a bottle of Cristal, and it's a two-bottle minimum.
You spend $1,000 a night on champagne? No, not every night.
All right, barely ever.
and Hernan, everybody we take turns picking up the tab.
Hernan.
Or the girl he crippled when he flipped over the car? Is she there, drinking champagne with you in her wheelchair? It wasn't his fault.
Her parents are going for a big payday because his dad was in "Forbes" magazine.
Oh God almighty! If it makes you feel any better I've been looking for a new job every day online! Oh Jesus! You can't even talk to her.
Are you fucking kidding me? You should be kissing her feet.
Because when you were growing up, if it wasn't for her, I would have knocked all your baby teeth out with one shot.
I can't sleep.
- A.
J.
- Somebody call? It's not only that he's a complete stranger to the truth, he's got this dead streak in him.
It chills me to the bone.
He's fuckin' spoiled, that's all.
We gave him too much.
Come on, he went to school with lots of privileged kids.
Most of them are off in ivy league universities now, doing very well.
No, this is something in him.
Deep down it's like this big "fuck you" to everything.
I don't know what that's about.
Remember that whole god-is-dead business on the day of his confirmation? - Maybe he'll surprise us.
- Aren't you the sunny optimist when you want to go to sleep? - I saw the light was on.
Can I come in? - Sure, hon.
I'm going to California.
I don't know for how long.
- California? what are you talking about? - Finn took that year off.
And it was great when dad was hurt he was here for me.
But now he's going back to dental school, I want to be with him.
I thought you two were having problems.
I never said that.
I don't know if I want to go to law school or med school.
Those are nice options to have.
That's what we call a high-class problem.
His dad said that he can get me a lab job at UCLA where he teaches oral surgery.
I mean if I decide on med school that will look really great on my application.
What you're really saying is you're following this man to California.
Meadow, you drop this bomb on us at 1:30 in the morning forgive us if we need some time to adjust.
- I have to make plane reservations - You'll be back for Christmas? I don't know.
no pressure please, okay? Tidelands project your slice of no-shows I spoke to the union and we can't make five work no more.
Rollbacks, not to mention my end's way down.
Now more than ever I got captains looking to me to deliver them those no-show jobs - on account of the medical insurance.
- Health care costs these days.
Bitch all you want about John, he understood that ours is a mutually-beneficial arrangement.
John's folding laundry in fucking Danbury.
It's on my shoulders to take care of the family, even if he's boss just in name.
now I made a decision, and, with all due respect, it's final.
You see, this is what I get.
I never should have let you slide on the vitamins.
Again with the vitamins.
You told me there were 1500 cases of Centrum on that truck.
When your nephew delivered it, there were cartons ripped open, pills all over the floor.
Anybody got shorted, it was yours truly, but you know what all right, all right, all right, put it back in your pocket.
But I gotta get some relief on this other situation.
For the supreme commander's control over the sworn enemy's capital city is the epitome of their power in Europe.
I need to talk to you.
remember I told you about that trip to Paris? I won it at the silent auction at the feast.
Well, the date is here and I think I would like to go.
you don't remember the first goddamn thing about this, do you? we stood right here talking about it for 15 mites.
- I know, you won a trip to Paris.
- Why do you have to lie? I'm not! You're always saying I'm lying.
- Why Paris? - It is one of the great cities of the world.
But the frogs hate us.
- Go to Italy.
- They weren't auctioning a trip to Italy.
It's actually a good deal.
It's a week for two for $5,000.
How's the euro doing? I don't know, Tony.
I had three years of high-school French.
- I can't get away for a week, Carm.
- I could go with Ro.
We've been talking about taking a trip together for years ever since our Rome thing went belly up.
Oh yeah when Anthony walked through the plate-glass door.
I could really use a vacation now Meadow leaving, my spec house the thought of tearing it down and starting over, - It makes me nauseous.
- Yeah.
Plus him.
I just don't know what to do anymore.
You know what? You should go.
You deserve it.
It'd be good for you too.
Do whatever it is that boys do when they're on their own.
Whatever.
I said go.
I'll be fine.
I'm so excited.
I'm gonna call Ro.
Oh, hey hey! Look.
Tony.
Hey.
What the fuck? My brother's over there.
- What's that supposed to mean? - Nothing.
he's just there, that's all.
You sandbag me, I cut your fucking throat open.
I'm sorry.
I didn't know what else to do.
I want back in.
- Can I sit? - No, you can't sit.
It was complicated.
I was working things out.
I'm sure it gets complicated when you're taking it up your fag ass.
I'm not a fag.
I never was.
- Excuse me? - It was the medication I was on.
For my blood pressure.
It fucked with my head, but I'm over that now.
I can probably get a letter from my doctor.
A note from your doctor saying you don't like to suck cock? First off, I pay my way back in.
I got 200k that goes directly to you personally.
No one else needs to know.
Long term, I know construction's out.
Those guys But meth, running girls, a lot more tolerant atmosphere.
I got contacts in A.
C.
With your support I could set myself up there.
I'd be close but not too close.
Ton'! Please, don't turn your back on me.
He was fucking stalking you, T.
That's the thing with the gays.
It's the living in the closet, makes them devious.
Speaking of crystal meth, look at this walyo.
Say what you will about Richie Aprile, but when he found out his son was gay, he did the right thing.
He disowned him.
I got an A.
A.
meeting.
Alcoholics-fucking-anonymous now too Salvatore Lucania must be looking down on all of us - With great pride.
- There's gonna be a lot of popular sentiment to get rid of Vito.
Phil alone fuck Phil! You know what that's about? He's gotta polish his rep as a tough prick so he can make boss.
Vito in Atlantic City He's out there.
He's not part of us.
And we get, you know, a trickle of cash coming in each month.
- You ready? - Oh, there's so much going on here, just the thought of flying, the heightened security come on.
I got something for you, for your trip.
Now this is the real Louis "Vitoon.
" You had a rough year me in the hospital, you there around the clock I want you to enjoy yourself.
Hmm? when you were in that coma, I told you I loved you.
- Do you remember? - No.
- I should tell you more often.
- Well Nobody's stopping ya.
Okay, listen up, kids.
Francesca, look at me.
You can't tell anyone, even your friends at school, that daddy's home - for a little while.
- Are you gonna have to go back to Afghanistan? The CIA doesn't tell you where they'll send you next.
Is it dangerous to be a spy? Not as long as nobody knows who you are.
I'm what they call "working deep cover.
" That's why, like I said, - You gotta keep the secret.
- I won't tell.
- You better not! - I won't! I love you guys.
How long till you can move back in with us? Just until I straighten this shit out with Tony.
It's looking good.
In a few days I'll know.
What about counseling for your problem? - Have you talked to father Macken? - Marie, I thought I made it clear I don't have a problem.
That's over with.
In fact, I'm seriously thinking we should have another kid.
Yo, dad, check it! Attaboy, V! Hello? Hi.
Fuck you.
- I know, look - Not a word, not a note.
- What kind of person are you? - I'm sorry.
You'd help.
You're seriously fucked up.
I got kids.
I couldn't live without 'em.
Bullshit.
It was the fucking life you couldn't live without the gambling, the money, who knows what else.
You're right.
I didn't want to drag you down into this pit I'm in.
Hey, fuck that! everybody else is stupid to you, aren't they? - No.
- You can throw your weight around down there in fucking Jersey.
Everybody kisses your ass.
- I miss you.
- I don't want to know you.
I don't want to hear your voice.
Don't ever call me again.
Do your bowels just jam up when you fly? Hey-yyy! Hopalong che-se-dic'.
What do you know? What do you say? - How you been? - Word is you reached out to Tony.
I appreciate you coming out to see me.
how you doin'? Nicole is choking my balls with this child support.
I could be looking at six months in county.
- Oof! - I was wondering if you could float me 20k at two points, but maybe now is not a good time for you.
No.
No, I could do that.
But I'm gonna have to say two and a half.
Okay.
You know I'm good for it.
Would you stop? Heard on 1010-wins the tunnel's a parking lot.
I hope you didn't get caught in that.
You said you were gonna take care of that fucking finook.
Oh, for Christ's sake.
Fucking Vito again? What the fuck is wrong with you? He's in town, isn't he? I was at Marie's the other night.
She played the innocent, but I could tell she'd seen him.
You're fucking carnac the great now too, huh? I gotta tell you, Anthony, if Vito was here - And you knew about it - Fuck this.
I love they let you smoke here.
I think I should have slept in a while before hitting the stores.
I told you.
- Is your stomach still upset? - I put in the fucking memory stick.
I love that sound French.
It's so elegant.
Isn't it? Nobody fucking knows us here, Ro.
can you believe that? All the guidebooks say you should try and get on the local schedule.
- Did you reset your watch? - Yes, Napoleon.
Jesus.
Eloise and Abelard, my god! What? I would say today the first cultural stop should be the Louvre.
Again, Remy! - How do you say "please"? - S'il vous plait.
- S'il vous plait.
- And the check please.
I don't know what the fuck he said.
You keep talking English.
Why don't you try and use your French? I don't know.
I feel strange.
Me and Tony went to Miami.
He knows like six words in Spanish, but he was right out there with them like he was fucking Ricardo Montalban or something.
Mmm.
I told you we should have gone towards Rue Dauphine.
God damn it, where's my other glove? I had it when we went in there.
- I'm all turned around.
- You had to hurry me out of that restaurant.
- We're miles from the Louvre.
- Fuck, damn it.
I already lost a glove.
Oh my god.
Holy shit.
Look at those clouds.
Paris skies who could have built this? look! Just like "Charade"! Make sure you clean that shit off her tit! Vito Atlantic City, forget it.
Why the change up? I can't keep fighting Phil on this.
Our businesses are all entwined.
You gotta pick your battles.
you want your no-show jobs, Vito's gotta go.
It's the right move, T.
All those weeks in the hospital, surgeries, constant pain, for what? Come out here and get shot over something like this? I'm sorry.
If Vito wanted to pursue that lifestyle, he should have done so quietly.
He was, wasn't he? Anyone in particular you want to give this to? Carlo had the biggest problem with it, let him handle it.
It's Vito's own fault.
why couldn't he stay wherever the fuck he was? Don't beat yourself up about this.
I'll tell Carlo to be at the mall.
Hi, it's me.
I just wanted to let you know that we got in safe and sound.
Call me back.
remember, it's six hours ahead.
Miss you.
I notice all these little plaques all over what do they say? "August 20, 1944.
this man Francois Martine fought in the resistance and the Germans shot him right here on this spot.
" Phil? What the fuck did that tailor do to my Zanella's? - What? - My slacks, what! He's losing his eyesight, poveret'.
Diabetes.
I'll take them to the Korean on my way to church tomorrow.
I've got a meeting of concerned Catholic mothers.
Tell you the truth, I almost want to not go to the meeting.
- Here we go.
- A gay in our own family? This protestant minister from Denver is coming to speak to us tomorrow.
An expert.
I'm so embarrassed in front of father.
Father told me Vito doesn't renounce that lifestyle - He's damned.
- I know.
- What? - I know.
Father put it so well last week.
- "there's nothing gay about hell," he said.
- That's good.
I'm sure he didn't come up with that himself.
One thing I do know, Vito has to be made to face his problem squarely.
Thanks for the ride.
New York's only classic rock station: - Q104.
3 - Here.
You don't need to do that, but you're sweet.
Okay.
- Yeah? - I was just wondering if you thought about my offer.
Yeah, I thought, and I need to know who these Atlantic City contacts are.
Meet me in the mall, 11:00.
don't be late.
- Get him up.
- No! - Come here, come here.
- Shut up.
Don't be moving.
Stop.
You're a fucking disgrace.
husband comes home with a duck under his arm, he says, "This is the pig I've been fucking.
" The wife says, "It's not a pig, it's a duck.
" He says, "I wasn't talking to you.
" Vito he was found beat to death this morning in a motel in Fort Lee.
- My cop up there told me.
- Minchia.
Plus the homicide detectives told him Vito had a pool cue rammed up his ass.
- Lover's quarrel maybe? - Look, we all know who did it.
Phil! The fucking balls on that prick! What did I always say about him? I see you heard the news.
- That must have been Phil, right? - Jimmy Olsen over here.
I know he's out of line, but still, you kind of have to admire the guy.
It's not all talk with him.
I'm just saying he saved us all a lot of trouble, right? Can't have been an easy decision, killing a made guy, huh? Naturally Phil won't brag about it 'cause he can't.
Phil was in a tough situation, his family honor was stained.
If I got to Vito first, net result would have been the same.
Fucking-a.
I wish I'd have borrowed money from Vito.
You know what this is, right? It's not about Vito, it's about me.
Phil's saying he can do whatever the fuck he wants, including kill a captain in my own family and I can't do a fucking thing about it.
It's always been partly about that.
Believe me, the vitamins are just the beginning.
It's Carmela.
- Is Paris burning? - Hi, you busy? No no, just bullshitting with Sil.
How's it goin'? Actually it's cold, raining.
- When it drizzles, huh? - You're worse than Ro.
I'm going out of my mind with these pop references.
I am seeing some incredible things, Tony.
Talk about the History Channel, you would love it here.
- How's the toast? - The what? The french toast? Actually they call it something else.
- How's the french fries? - Pommes allumettes.
- Fuck it.
- Have you heard from Meadow? More than I thought.
You realize this kid knows how to do absolutely nothing? She was asking if she needed to get the car serviced regularly 'cause there's no snow out there.
- How's Prince Albert? - He'd fit right in over in France.
None of those dipshits want to work either.
I did get him to hose down the trash cans though.
That's something.
You're probably busy.
I'll let you go.
I just wanted to say hello.
I miss you.
I miss you too.
be careful, eh? People are gonna expect a response.
See, this is what the fuck I was talking about.
- We hit one of Phil's guys? - Joe Bananas went after Carlo Gambino.
Made guys got killed, the war went seven years.
How many times do I gotta say this? When guys are on the mattresses, they're not out earning.
So? What? All Phil cares about is fucking money.
He's got that wire room in Sheepshead Bay, right? - Our guys have seen it.
- Yeah.
I live in Las Vegas six months.
My friend has a restaurant.
I work there.
- I like U.
S.
A.
- And I like France.
Ro, are you coming or what? - Okay, you call me, yeah? - D'accord.
He lives in Belleville.
They've got a Belleville in France.
You're not really gonna go out with him, are you? - I mean he's like 26 years old.
- Duh! God, isn't this pretty? "1350 A.
D.
" You realize some woman just like us wore this? She was probably married, had children.
"Gallo roman baths, third century.
" I wonder what they got up to there, huh? This city is so old.
You think about all the people who have lived here, Generation after generation, Hundreds and hundreds of years, all those lives.
God, it's so sad.
I mean, it isn't sad, I don't know.
It just makes you think, - Just makes you look at yourself differently.
- Mmm.
There was this one night in the hospital when it was very touch-and-go with Tony.
- Mm-hmm.
- He came out of the coma for a minute and he said, "who am I? where am I going?" At the time I didn't know what he meant.
But coming here, I feel the same way.
Isn't that odd? Let me get a picture.
Oh honey, what? We worry so much.
Sometimes it feels like that's all we do, but in the end it just gets washed away.
All of it just just gets washed away.
Come here.
Oh.
I know what the papers are saying, but the police think it might've not have been a gay thing.
Marie, honey, they pick up strangers in bars and truck stops.
The way they beat him oh God, his face.
He didn't even look like a person anymore.
You can't let your mind dwell on turn that off! Aunt Cel' hasn't called.
not even to talk to the kids.
How could people be so cruel? It is a sin after all, Marie.
The church is very clear on that.
But you're here.
You came.
Father always says hate the sin, love the sinner.
I wish I was dead.
I mean it, I wish I was dead! You know what? I'll make the funeral arrangements.
You're in no condition.
Given the circumstances, A small private service, just the immediate family.
He was a good man, wasn't he, Phil? He was.
I loved him like a brother-in-law.
But god moves in strange ways.
Our tailor, he's going blind, 47 years old.
Walk in those shoes.
And I gotta think, Marie, Vito on some level maybe it's better for the kids not to have that role model.
So All the women in your house are gone.
How do you feel about Carmela taking a trip without you? Do we really have to fucking talk about this? Of course not.
Before we end, is there anything you'd like to discuss? Okay.
How about the fact that I hate my son? I come home and he's sitting on the computer in his fucking underwear.
Wasting his time in some chitchat room, going back and forth with some other fucking jerkoff, giggling like a little schoolgirl.
I want to fucking smash his fucking face in.
My son.
What do you think about that? Anthony, I think your anger towards A.
J.
Has been building for some time.
We have to deal with this.
All I know is it's a good thing my father's not alive, - Because he'd find this fucking hilarious.
- Find what hilarious? The kind of son I produced.
You mean because Anthony doesn't conform to your father's idea of what a man should be? His, mine or anybody's.
Let me tell you If Carmela let me kick A.
J.
's ass like my father kicked my ass, - He might have grown up with some balls.
- Like you.
Yeah, like me.
He might have also grown up taking out his anger at his father's brutality towards him on others.
He might have grown up with a desperate need to dominate and control.
Anthony, we've been dancing around this for years how you live.
What is it you want for your life? I couldn't even hit him if I wanted to, he's so fucking little.
It's Carmela's side of the family, they're small people.
her father you could knock him over with a fucking feather.
Okay.
But I have to point out what you resent Carmela doing for A.
J.
, protecting him from his father, is the very thing you had often wished your mother had done for you.
I love this fois gras.
I can't get enough.
The presentation alone gives you calories, but who cares? We should feel guilty? We walked our asses off.
Man, you know what's strange, Ro? When you go to a place you've never been before, it's like all the people were imaginary till you got there.
It's like until you saw them, they never existed, and you never existed to them.
I don't know, maybe you're more a Philosophical person than I am.
No no, it just made me think, that's all.
You know, it's the same as when you die life goes on without you.
Like it does in Paris when we're not here.
Tomorrow we hit the stores.
- Chloe, Dior.
- A Kelly bag pour moi.
Bordeaux is so delicious.
When we were in St.
Eustache's I noticed that you lit two candles, for Jackie and Jackie Jr.
, right? You know we never really talked about that.
- About what? - About Jackie Jr.
What's there to talk about? Madame.
Oof, madonn'.
- Merci.
- Oh boy! I didn't mean to invade, Ro.
It's just I mean, we're friends.
If there was anything you wanted to share I mean, I-I cannot begin to imagine losing a son.
Jesus, Carm.
We're on vacation.
We're having a beautiful dinner.
Why would you bring this up? I didn't mean to upset you, Ro.
I thought because we had this time together - It's fucking morbid, that's what it is.
- I'm sorry, Ro.
He's dead.
He's gone.
What can I do about it? Light a candle.
I picture him with his dad, and with his grandma who he loved and with Jesus.
what's the matter with you? Why would you bring New Jersey here? - Why can't we just have a good time? - You're right, I apologize.
I'm going out with Michel tonight.
Okay.
You know, you're welcome to come, Carm.
- I mean that.
- Thank you, but no.
You go.
I want to walk along the seine one more time.
We gotta call the exterminator.
these are rat turds.
What time did Patsy and them say? There they are! The pirates of Prosciutt', - The Brigands of Bracioll'.
- Hey, Dom.
Game out in Canarsie.
I appreciate the rollers you sent.
Linguini fra diav', you want to stay? Naw, I gotta stop by my daughter's in Metuchen.
Hey sorry to hear about your boy.
Uh-huh.
Terrible thing.
Son 13, daughter nine years old.
Syracuse tanked again.
That pool cue I wonder if it was chalked.
Very funny, Dom.
very cute.
I don't quite get it, but cute.
Hey, you know the autopsy found a three ball in his side pocket? - You're on a run.
- They found a hankie with Carlo's lipstick in his other pocket.
I'm just breaking balls.
You're right though shouldn't laugh about a tragedy.
That old homo actor Raymond Navarro? He had an ivory dildo stuck up his ass when they found him.
Pretty up on all this shit, huh, Dom? Come to think of it, he was from Jersey too.
- What'd they find up your mother's cunt? - Time to hit the trail - For Metuchen, huh, what do you say? - My mistake.
Carlo's lipstick was on Vito's cock.
Hit him! Hit that prick! No, Carlo! Carlo! Get him off me! How's that, you fuck? Fuck! Call patsy and them, Say we had to leave a pipe broke.
We wait till the store closes, we get him out.
Cut him up in the work area? No more of that.
Uh, DNA.
Ditch his car, get some biangaleen.
Sil! Come on, open the door! - Shit.
- Hello, anybody in there? Ton', you don't want to come in here.
- Get back in your car, go for a ride.
- What? Fat Dom Gamiello came over, you know, just to break balls re Vito, Carlo Sil hit him first.
Tony, let me just that's right, Ton', you go.
You don't know nothin'.
You were right.
They kill a made guy, this is what happens.
Say hello to gab.
Tell her I hope she's over the flu.
Goddamn Vito! What's the hardest thing about skateboarding? I give up.
What's the hardest thing about skateboarding? Telling your parents you're gay.
- Signore.
- I thought you were going out for dinner.
See you in the garage a minute? - What now? - Tomorrow morning, 7:00 a.
m.
you go to this address.
You ask for a Mr.
Caravalho.
- I just got off the phone with him.
- At 7:00 in the morning?! - For what? - You're gonna be working construction.
- What? - Ferrying cement in a wheelbarrow.
- So, it's outdoors? - Yeah.
- Well, it's wintertime.
- You've got a lot of those hooded sweatshirts like the mulignans wear that you watch on MTV.
- You can double up.
- Come on, this is bullshit.
Every penny you make, you keep.
we won't charge you any rent.
And believe me, the pay is good.
it's a union job.
I just want to see you do good.
You're my son and I love you.
Look, I'm just gonna have to leave your friend in the lurch when I go back to school.
That's okay, he deals with that all the time.
I'd just as soon keep searching online.
I'm sure you would, but if you're not at that site tomorrow morning, I'm gonna take away your car.
And then I'm gonna take away your clothes.
And then I'm gonna take away your room and then I'm gonna take away your mother's cooking.
And pretty soon you're gonna be out in the fucking street.
- What the hell are you doing? - It might get a little drafty driving down there tomorrow.
But I will have this fucking thing towed out of here and ground up into fucking Brillo pads.
I mean look at it.
You don't take care of it.
Don't put me to the test.
Look, I found Cosette.
Your friend someone needs to tell her she's dead.
Your taxi is coming.
Bonsoir, madame.
Shit! the Toulouse-Lautrec placemats.
I got the other one.
There she is! The world traveler.
- Mmm.
- Hey! - How was your trip? - Oh my God, Tony.
Welcome home.
How was the trip? Oh my God, Ma, Paris! "Police are withholding specific details of the murder.
A Brooklyn relative of Spatafore who spoke on conditions of anonymity" what does that mean? It means when you don't know who the person is.
"told reporters that Spatafore and his wife had recently separated.
Relatives say that the victim had surprised his friends and family by declaring himself a homosexual and saying he wished to lead an openly gay lifestyle.
" I don't understand.
Dad wasn't a spy? No.
With this jet lag, I can't sleep.
I'm doing darks if you have any.
Have a great day at work.
- Hey, I knew this guy.
- What? He was in the mob? I shot him for the thin club.
here.