The Wonder Years s06e11 Episode Script

Over the years, a family develops a kind of character.
A sense of heritage.
A feeling of roots.
For my family, those roots extended all the way to the back of our garage.
It was kind of our Plymouth Rock.
Hey - look at this.
The old placemats.
They'll be great if we have a dinner party.
Yeah, great.
Remember these? Those are mine! Bonnie'll love 'em in the kid's room.
Hey, but - Thanks.
The final week of nineteen-seventy-two.
Where I lived, it was a time of change.
Most particularly in the person of Wow - curtains.
My new brother.
Sure - maybe this looked like the same doofus I'd shared a room with for fifteen years but in one way, he was different.
Will ya look at this pattern, huh? Wayne was in love.
Come on - let's show Bonnie.
And somehowOur garage was never gonna be the same again.
Hey - look at these! This stuff's great! Not that I begrudged the guy his good fortune.
After all, he'd found the girl of his dreams.
These are nice, Wayne.
Bonnie Douglas.
Twenty-three, divorced, and mother of one.
You sure it's alright if we take all this? - Oh, of course it is.
- Yeah - of course it is! Uh, peekaboo! - sweetheart - Wh-what did I do? But it wasn't what he'd done that was so perplexing it was how he was doing it.
Honey You know, you're looking awfully thin - are you sure you're getting enough rest? You know, working two shifts at the plantHe doesn't have time to sleep Besideswho says I want to sleep? God Wayne? A little help, here Oh, yeah.
WellPut it in back, anddon't break anything.
Gotchya.
look at him - he's the cutest little baby.
Look at those eyes.
What a handsome, handsome boy Yeah.
Hell of a lot better lookin' than his old man.
Which, around my houseWas kind of a sore subject.
Has, uhJames beencalling again? Well, noa couple times, but, you knowjust to say "hi".
Mom Don't worry.
You know, the guy's a jerk.
Come onwe gotta go.
And there it was.
Almost overnight, Wayne had changed.
He'd become a picture of patienceSacrifice.
Socan I give you a buck for your help? Huh? Huh? Generosity.
Hang on to it.
Suit yourself.
I'm goin' for the night-shift.
It was almost ironic.
My no-good, lay-about brotherhad becomeA devoted family-man.
As opposed to sayme.
A man devoted to avoiding his family.
Hut-hut.
hike! No matter what the cost.
back! Back! In the first ten days of Christmas recess I'd participated in thirteen semi-organizedSemi-suicidal touch football games.
Jeez.
This ground is rock-solid.
I think I broke somethin'.
- What are we doing here? - Of course, the reason was obvious.
Got ya outta the house, didn't it? He's right.
Come on, guyslet's huddle up.
At sixteen, we were men on the run, fleeing house, home, and parents.
Afraid of nothing.
Except, maybe What are you guys doin' for New Year's eve? Uh.
Serving drinks at my parent's party.
You? My uncle's showing home-movies.
New Year's eve.
The nightmare of family togetherness.
Hey, ya knowEddie Putnam's having a big party.
Yeahat his parents' ski-condo.
In the mountains.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
Plus, Eddie's folks are gonna be out of town, in Aruba.
It was an image to warm the heartOf any red-blooded adolescent.
A beacon of romancerevelryfreedom A moonlit night.
Eddie Putnam's dad's ski-condoand Winnie.
- Happy New Year.
- Happy New Year.
And suddenly, from the ashes of Christmas at homea new hope arose.
A New Year's inspiration.
And all of itjust two hours by car.
Alright - I'm goin'.
Count me in.
- Everyone - go long.
Ready - Break! and with that, The plan was set.
A New Year's blowout.
Down.
Set.
Hut-hut! And nothing could stand in my way.
- Except - A party At a ski-lodge? Just one little hitch.
Wellit's not exactly a lodge And it's not really a party.
Just The bash of the century.
.
a get-together, ya know? They're not gonna have beer, are they? Mom, come on! Beer? Totally ridiculous.
So, what do you say? WellI guess it would be OK Great.
Except, we already have plans for New Year's eve.
- We? - We do? Your brother's taking us all out to dinner.
The whole family.
Including Winnie.
What?! istn't that sweet? He wants to be his treat Well, that's great, but I you know i think it's really important to Wayne.
He's been working so hardKnocking himself out for Bonnie and the baby.
Yeah, wellthanks but no thanks.
Kevin! Mom! Hmmm.
Clearly, we were at an impasse.
So, faced with a tough decision, Mom did what any fair-minded parentWould do.
Why don't you ask your father, honey? Ask me what? - Dad - about that New Years eve thing - You're going, and that's that.
So much for fair-mindedness.
Bye, honey! I'd been set up, sold out, and shipped down the river.
With New Year's eve fast approaching I knew my only hope wasTo look to a higher source.
Wayne - why can't the family get together another night? Because.
Holidays are a time for family.
- yeah - ow, The chothes are hot Wayne! BesidesI thought it would be a nice thing to do.
Who was this guy?And what had he done with my brother? Look I've got other things to do on New Years' eve.
And I was just thinkin' that the family could just hang out without me.
Hang out? We're not just hangin' out! We're goin' to a supper-club.
A supper-club? God - it was worse than I thought.
Oh, yeah! Dinner and a show.
.
maybe a comedian or something.
I reserved us a table right up front.
Will you give me a hand folding this before Bonnie gets here? OK, then.
Maybe it wasTime to take a different tack.
BoyThat must be settin' you back a few bucks.
You know, I hear those supper-clubs cost a bundle.
HeyWhat's money if you don't have people to spend it on, huh? And that's when it hit me.
This wasn't loveThis was insanity.
WAYNE: Besides It wouldn't be the same without you there, son.
Son? OKEnough was enough.
Look, Wayne.
Number one, I'm not your son.
And number two, I don't want to spend New Year's eve in a stupid supper club You don't? No! That's what I'm saying! Well Sure - maybe it was selfish But under the circumstancesAbsolutely necessary.
Hey - I'm sorry I'm late.
- Oh, that's OK.
You get caught up? - Kind ofI saw James.
Woops.
What'd he want? "What did he want?" - The same old thing, to hash everything out we've been through like a hundred times.
I'm shopping, I'm having a good time,and I come out of the store, and he's sitting there, waiting for me.
Why? W-what? Is he following you? I'm gonna kill this guy! Ya know, I'm sick Wayne - don't worryI set him straight for goodI told him it's over like twenty times.
Are ya sure? Definitely.
And there ya had it.
Love at the laundromat.
Two kidsWorking it out.
And one kid making his get-away.
So, Kevin? Are we gonna see you New Year's eve? what? rats! Wellyou know, I was justtalking with Wayne and, don't worry.
He's gonna be there.
- But I thought - - It'd mean a lot to us, Kevin.
Right, honey? And with that kissThere went my night of revelry.
There went Eddie Putnam's dad'sSki-condo.
See ya there! And in its placeI was leftWith just one thought.
New Year's eveWas gonna be onelongnight.
Everybody on this field here today December thirty-first, the final day of nineteen seventy two.
Bands were playing, the crowds were cheering Teenagers were sulking.
Big-time.
So, what do you think? - About what? - My new suit! Pretty sharp, huh? You bought a new suit? Yeah! I want to look good for tonite.
You don't think it's too, uh WayneYou're blocking the TV.
Oh.
Sorry.
Great.
It wasn't bad enough I was stuck in the house.
Now I had to share it with a love-struckClotheshorse.
Oh, maybe Dad has a better tie.
W- wayne Look - about tonight Hey.
You don't have to say a word - I know what you're thinkin'.
- You do? - Sure! You don't have to wear a suit.
A jacket and tie will do just fine.
OK, buddy? uh-ha So, while the rest of my teenage world was heading offTo a New Year's bash in a snow-covered north I was doomed to a night of Family.
I remember the first New Year's eve that Jack and I spent together.
I was nineteen and we had dinner with your parents.
.
- remember, honey? - yeah, i remember Yeah, this was homey.
I just think it's so great what you have here.
The two of you The history you have How much you love your kids Well, that's what we're here for.
- Right? - Right.
Gimme a break And David's gonna have his first New Year's eve! God OK! Let's get a move on! - Seeya there! - OK.
You want to take him? Wayne - sure I can't help you out with the bill, tonight? Sorry, Dad.
Tonight's my treat.
It'll be a night you never forget.
Right, Kev-bo? Which as it happenedWas exactlyWhat I was afraid of.
- Seeya there! - Bye! And so, there was nothing to doBut roll out the barrels, and start the fun.
I mean, hey - How bad could it be? A few hours laterI had my answer.
In spades.
By nine-fifteen It was clearthis was gonna be the worst New Year's eve in history.
Bar none.
I'll tell ya, I wouldn't mind having those girls at my next luau if ya know what I mean.
- He's funny, isn't he? - Yeah.
A riot.
I feel like I'm on location with Jack Lord.
But it wasn't just the bad jokesAnd stupid hats And the God-awful music that were gnawing at me.
Did ya hear the one about the peanut walking down the street? There was something missing here.
- Something like - Dad, where's Wayne? - Got meprobably hit traffic.
- Whatfor an hour-and-a-half? Don't worry, honey - he'll be here.
This is his night.
But I wasn't so sure.
I bet he's at someplace good.
Like a party.
Kevin, will you stop? Why don't you just relax, and have fun? OK, ladies and gentlemen.
Now we got a special treat for you! Straight from I don't know where *** Max the Magnificent! - That's it.
I'm calling Wayne.
- Kevin But I'd had it.
I was outta there.
thank you You know what I need from the audience is avolunteer.
- How about you, sir? - No, Ino.
Oh, come on, Jack - you love magic - No, I - Come on ***I must say, I insist.
*** Ah, well.
Like they saya bird on the head Come on, butthead - pick up! But Wayne was still unaccounted for.
Face it.
This whole evening was one colossal bust.
Bonnie? - You're late.
- Kevin, hi The way she was dressed made me glad I hadn't worn a tux.
Is your family here? Well, they're inside.
Arent' ya gonna come in? - Is Wayne here? - No - Isn't he with you? - No.
What happened? I meanhe spill something on his suit? But suddenly I had a feeling this wasn't about haberdashery.
I was hoping he was here.
He was so upset when he left.
He left? What do you mean he left? Kevin Wayne and I split up.
What?! It's not that I don't love him.
I mean, he came into my life, and he's done so much for meand you see how great he is with David But It's just that I just saw James, and I didn't think I'd feel anything It wasweird.
There we were - some phoney magicianHarassing my dad While my brother's whole life was coming apart.
Maybe I shouldn't have told him tonight.
God - you really must hate me, huh? Not to mention your folks - what they're gonna think of me But if she'd come looking for forgiveness I'm sorry.
I really am.
But not for you.
Yeah.
Kevin! You don't want to miss this! They're about to saw your father in half.
And now, ladies and gentlemen, for my finale - sawing a human bodyIn half.
But somehow, I knew I couldn't stay to pick up the pieces.
Kevin, is everything alright? No.
We gotta find Wayne.
That night we looked for Wayne everywhere.
Bonnie's houseour housesix coffee-shops, four bars even the bowling alley.
But he was nowhere.
It was like hevanished.
And then just when we were ready to give up Isn't that Wayne's car? Where? We found him.
Yeah, that's it.
Maybe you should go in alone.
Yeah.
I wasn't quite sure what to expect.
For some reason, I'd never actually hung out at a laundromat on New Year's eve.
So I tried to prepare myself for the worst.
An outraged maniac.
A jilted slob.
He shoots! Or, just a guy in a bad suitTossing socks at a washing machine.
Wayne? Hey, butthead! Fancy meeting you here.
Catch.
That a way You missed it.
I sank sixteen in a row! OK.
Seventeen.
All the people that were here earlier doing laundry werevery impressed.
You'd be surprised how many people save their laundry for the major holidays.
Is it me, or.
.
am I the only one talking here? Ya knowwe missed you at the dinner club.
Oh, yeah? How'd it go? good, They had a m-magician.
Sounds like hell.
Yeah.
Listen, uh I heard about what happened.
Yeah.
Me, too.
Ya know You can'tmakesomeone fall in love with you.
Nah, noYou can't make 'em fall in love.
It's just gotta happen! And I guess that's when it hit me.
How hard this guy had tried.
How hard he'd been trying his whole life.
And suddenly it all made sense.
Who my brother really was.
Not the family man he'd wanted to be Or the stupid older brother I'd fought with my whole life.
But just another grown up kid with the broken heart Kevin? Are you guys OK? It's almost midnight! Say this for my girlfriendShe had timing.
We are here, in Times Square Another year, huh? Nineteen seventy-two was a memory.
- Five! Four! - Like it or not.
Three! Two! One! Happy New Year! Happy New Year The funny thing isLooking back now - Happy New Year, Kevin.
- Happy New Year.
What I remember most is how it ended.
So, buttheadYou gonna kiss her or not? Come on! You're only young once Hell - the guy was right.
So maybe that New Year's eve, nineteen seventy-two Didn't work out exactly like any of us planned.
There was heartbreak we didn't anticipate and events we couldn't have imagined.
Still, it wasn't all bad.
There was a magician.
So maybe there was a message in it all.
The future was calling us.
And no matter what There was no turning back now.